I slowly came to again. My head was in extreme pain, and my thoughts were scrambled and scattered. I blinked my eyes quickly a few times to clear away the fuzziness. I looked around to see... chest.

"Bah!" I quickly jumped to my feet and ran forward a few steps to get away from whoever I had just seen. I ended up running into the corner of a desk in whatever room I was in. The corner contacted the middle of my head, putting me in even worse pain. "Argh!" I fell backwards onto my rear end. I rubbed my head lightly to try and ease the pain.

"Sharky?! Are you ok?!" I looked around quickly for the source of the voice. Suddenly, white filled my vision. I looked up, following the smooth white belly of somebody. I mentally made myself skip what I knew I would see further above, and looked straight at Rarity's face.

"Gah! Rarity!" I scooted even further backwards, stunned to see her as a human... kind of. "I mean uh... H-hi Rarity..."

"Sharky! You're back!" Rarity, totally ignoring my reactions to her, ran over and wrapped me in a big hug. Totally oblivious the the fact that her chest was on my face! I quickly pushed Rarity off of me and got back to my feet.

"Never. Never do that again. Make a shirt or something now." I turned away from Rarity the moment I started speaking. She had a confused tone to her voice when she responded.

"What? Why did you push me? What's wrong Sharky?" I started breathing in and out deeply in order to calm myself. I didn't mean to freak out so badly.

"Nothing... Say, isn't this your room?" I looked around at the somewhat familiar surroundings. I would definitely never forget the room I slept with a pony in!

"Why, yes it is dear. Why won't you look at me?" Rarity tried walking in front of me, but I closed my eyes and put both hands over them.

"How in hell did I end up here? The last thing I remember is being hit by the bear." Rarity paused for a moment, leaving the room wrapped in silence

"That's all you remember?"

"Yeah."

"Nothing else?"

"Why? Should I?"

"... *sigh* I rather wish you did. Anyway, you are here because after you passed out, Steven walked you over here."

"Steven did that? Ya bet I did. Boy, did I get an eyeful on the way..."

"Well, he stared at me the whole time. He tried to touch me too, but I set him straight." I rubbed my cheek as I suddenly noticed a new pain.

"I see. Well, can you... please make a shirt?"

"You want a shirt dear? Well, I'll have to measure you..."

"No no, not for me, for you."

"What? Why?"

"Cause you're naked. That's bad if you're a human, which you kinda seem to be."

"So... not having clothing on as a human is a bad thing?"

"... Well, it's not necessarily bad, but i-it's really throwing me off."

"Why? What's wrong with it dear?"

"*sigh* Look, in order to truly explain that, I'd have to delve into some science and history of my kind. I really don't think you're all that interested in it. Please, just cover yourself? Upper and lower body preferably."

"Umm... if you insist..." I heard some rustling for a moment. "Ok, I'm covered!" Rarity announced happily. I uncovered my eyes and saw that she had simply wrapped herself in plain purple fabric from just below her collarbones down to just below her hips. She was cutting it very close to indecent, but I could live.

"Close enough."

"Yes, it's not exactly fashionable, but I suppose it'll have to do for now."

"Ha, hey, this reminds me. I need to take you out to dinner still!" Rarity gave me a small confused grin.

"You want to take me to dinner?!"

"Rather, I want to have you for dinner! Well yeah, remember? We were supposed to go when I took you to get your mane fixed, but it got too late." Rarity nodded.

"Yes dear, the time you left me to the rabid paparazzi. I remember that very well."

"Well uhh... uh..." Rarity giggled lightly.

"I'm kidding dear! It's just a bit of humor."

"I didn't know you had a sense of humor Rarity!" I gave her a broad grin back. She started blinking at me quickly.

"Oh? You... like a girl with a sense of humor?" I nodded.

"Eeyup. Funny girls are great! Not as fun as shy girls though." Rarity gave me a small frown.

"Oh. So, what exactly do you like in a girl, hmm?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Oh, just curious." I walked around to Rarity's bed and sat down on the edge, still facing her.

"Well, I can respect curiosity. I guess if I had to choose... I like shy girls, smart girls, and girls with class." At that third one, Rarity got a huge grin. "One or the other though, not one with all three traits. I guess for good measure, if they were athletic as well it would be nice. Athletic girls usually have better bodies. Not too athletic though, because then their... Actually, that's enough explaining. Sluts. the easier the better. I know you didn't ask, but I felt like sayin."

"Their what dear?"

"Nothing, nothing. So, what do you like in a stallion?" Rarity seemed caught off guard.

"W-why would you ask that?"

"Oh, I dunno, just... curious." I grinned at her.

"Well... I wasn't expecting you to ask... but... I like..." Rarity seemed to be slowly moving towards me. "A tall, strong male... that's brave and kind. Being a gentlepony is necessary." She was blinking a lot, and certainly getting closer. I started leaning back a little nervously. "Good with foals is a must. A very, very large must... and I've only ever met one like that..." Rarity was practically on top of me on the bed now. I could feel my throat tightening with nervousness. I swallowed the lump in my throat and managed to speak again.

"Uhh... is that Sweetiebelle?!" I pointed behind Rarity towards the doorway. She frowned and looked back.

"Sweetibelle I thought I told y... Sweetiebelle isn't here..." While Rarity was talking to nothing, I rolled off the bed and fell onto the floor on the other side.

"Well, look at the sun! I've got to be going, see you for that dinner tomorrow Rarity! I'll... ask about that half-human thing later. Byeeeee!" I sprinted for the door and barreled down the stairs. I ran right for the door and flung it open, allowing me to acidentally plow into the group of half-human girls in front of it. "Oh hi! You're all... naked. Fuck yeah, all of you hold still for a minut-- ahh crap." I lifted my hands in front of my eyes again.

"Sharky, why are ya coverin' you're eyes? Aren't you happy to see the girls that saved you?" RD asked. The pure confidence in her voice brought a smile to my face.

"I'd love to see the girls that saved me, but they're naked. Maybe if they go get something to wear from Rarity, I'll talk to them."

"What? Why is this so important?" Twilight asked. I sighed heavily again.

"Look, Shy, RD, go inside and get something to wear. Twilight, let me explain this to you. After you get clothes of some sort. I'll be at Flutters-- wait, the animals are all still evil! What are you guys doing here?!" Twilight reached out and patted my shoulder.

"Don't worry. As soon as we had them all beat with Fluttershy's stare, they changed back. It was almost like they were made to be beaten."

"Oh... Good. Well, I'll meet you back at Fluttershy's house." I turned away from them and lifted my hand away from my eyes. To my relief, none of them had moved in front of me. I went to the library as quickly as I could, nearly sprinting. I made it in and the first thing I started looking for was Unity. I found Spike wandering around in the living room as a half-human. He had actual hands, was about three inches taller, and he had a short green mohawk instead of spines on his head. Luckily, he was more... physically restrained than the girls had been. "Hiya Spike!" The little dragon-boy jumped and his head snapped in my direction.

"Sharky! What in Equestria happened to me?!" He shouted. I shrugged.

"Hell if I know. Ask Twilight. By the way, I dunno if you heard, but you were right. I was hurting Twilight. So, I've moved. Sorry we couldn't spend more time together bud." I walked by him as I talked. I gave him a good pat on the head to show him I cared about him, then continued looking for Unity.

"W-wait! That's not what I wanted!"

"Well, sometimes what we want doesn't matter. In the end, no matter what, we have to do what's right. Right now, far as I can tell, not hurting Twilight is the right thing." Spike looked up at me with large glassy eyes.

"B-but Sharky... it's not what was supposed to happen..." I walked upstairs and found Unity laying in Spike's bed. I picked him up and he frowned at me.

"Hey, don't you give me that look! You almost killed me today!" He 'hmph'ed in a tiny baby squeak. I laughed and carried him back downstairs. "You must want dinner huh? Well, I should really go back home and make you a bottle." I walked out of the house without giving Spike another look.

"Ohhh... I'm never gonna hear the end of this from Twilight..."

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It didn't take me long to reach the place where the animals and I had fought. I found my sword laying where it had landed and my glove sitting right on top of it. I guess once the animals were back to normal the bird put my glove where I would find it. In fact, the robin that stole the glove was sitting on a branch above the blade. It looked down at me and chirped guiltily.

"Oh, you feel bad for what you did?" I asked the bird. It nodded at me. "Well, you're forgiven. It's not your fault after all. Actually, you were very smart!" The bird chirped at me questioningly. "Yeah, smart. You aimed for the cloth in the glove rather than my face directly. That makes you smart for thinking of a way to disarm me." The bird chirped happily and I laughed. "Yeah, good job. Well, I gotta go." I turned to leave, but the bird flapped behind me and landed on my right shoulder. "Oh, you wanna come along? Thank god, I hope it tastes like chicken! Well, I won't stop you."

"Bark!" Fang came loping out of the woods towards me. His ears were flat and he wouldn't look at me directly.

"Oh c'mon Fang, you can't think I'd be mad at you!" His left ear perked up. "If anything, I'd say I'm pretty proud of how well you held your own back there!" He tilted his head up at me and looked at me with interest. "You turned that bear right? I saw your marks all over him! That's amazing boy!" He lifted his head all the way up and barked happily. I laughed along with him. "Always remember, no matter what, you're still my best friend Fang!" I cheered to him. He yipped happily, and we made our way back home, a new friend in tow.

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I had finally settled Unity down and gotten to get some rest in. "Finally... Unity's in bed, I'm settled in my corner, and I might get to go t--"

*Knock* *Knock* *Knock*

"Well, nevermind." I pushed myself up off the ground, waking up the robin that refused to leave my shoulder and letting Fang, who had been curled up on my side, fall. "Who is it?"

"It's Twilight and Fluttershy!" I opened the door for them. Twilight was wearing a skin-tight dark blue dress that was the same length as Rarity's cloth. It had only one loop that went around her left shoulder. Fluttershy was wearing a green tank top that showed off her stomach and short green shorts. I gave Fluttershy a confused look.

"Rarity was running low on green f-fabric..." Fluttershy explained. I nodded.

"I understand. Hey, how much to adopt this bird? He seems to like me." I pointed to the robin on my shoulder.

"Oh, he's f-free. That isn't one of m-my birds..." I gave her a confused look.

"I thought you cared for all the animals..."

"W-well, I do... but not all of t-them ask me to find owners f-for them..."

"Oh, I see. Well, I was going to talk to Twilight, but I'm sure you know enough about animal biology to follow along with this discussion." Fluttershy gave me a timid smile and I turned to Twilight.

"Right, well... You were going to explain why clothes are so necessary." Twilight reminded me. We all strode inside and sat down in a few chairs.

"Yes of course, but first, I'd like to know what happened after that bear hit me. I'm kinda fuzzy after that, and out cold just a little while after that..." Twilight nodded.

"Of course! I'd be happy to tell you. Ok, here it goes. When Fluttershy ran in she paralyzed all of the animals simply with her stare. Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and I all came in just after that, not that we were needed. Fluttershy got all the animals to come back here all on her own! When we came back to you though, you were gone and Rarity was no longer with the rest of us. We all went to her boutique, expecting to find you there. You know the rest."

"Fair enough. Well, to explain why clothes are important to humans... You see, whereas you mares have a period called heat in which your body produces chemicals to arouse males, humans don't have that. Rather, the human male is conditioned to react to a female's physical apperance, specifically genetalia. This means that a female human's body can cause arousal in males on sight. In order to avoid this, humans wear clothes. It also provides minor heat and protection." Twilight and Fluttershy seemed to take in what I said for a moment.

"So... at any time, a human male can be made sexually aroused merely through sight?" Twilight asked. I nodded.

"Mind you, clothing was originally adopted for protection. However, now that we can control our environments, that's the only viable reason I can think of for you girls to wear clothing.

"B-but that means that... w-when you s-saw us earlier..." Fluttershy trailed off. I could feel a warm blush spread across my cheeks.

"Well, that's enough excitement for one day! Sorry, but we'll have to reschedule dinner Fluttershy. G'night!" I trudged groggily back into my corner and curled up. in a matter of minutes, I was asleep.