STILL MINORLY CLOPPY. NOT REAL CLOP, BUT THOSE NOT WANTING ANYTHING RELATIVELY CLOSE TO CLOP SHOULD SKIP THIS SECTION. WILL CONTINUE BELOW.

With Spike gone, I nervously cracked open the bathroom door. I saw Twilight exhale heavily and wipe her forehead. Her collar was off, but it was merely thrown on the floor next to the bed. If Spike had come in, there was a small chance, but still a chance, he would've figured it out. Luckily Twilight had talked him away. She panted heavily as she turned to look at me.

"T-that... was close." She gasped. I nodded in agreement.

"Too close. We uhhh.... shouldn't risk that again."

"... We're gonna do it again though."

"Oh yeah, sure. Just uhh... safer. Speaking of which... sorry. I couldn't stop..." I looked down at the floor bashfully as I went to retrieve my pants and boxers.

"Huh? Sorry about what?" Twilight asked raggedly, still trying to catch her breath fully.

"You know... erm... inside...." I stuttered out nervously while I pulled on my clothing. "I guess I kinda failed at the safety thing..."

"Oh! Hee hee hee! I told you I had a plan for that silly! I've gotten potions from Zecora and medecine from Dr. Wooly to prevent any kind of pregnancy or anything else that could happen. I thought it all through!"

"Oh... Well... still should've asked first or something."

"To waste just enough time for Spike to catch us?"

"Good point... Still sorry." I mumbled as I finished dressing myself. Twilight let out a huge sigh. I turned to see her snapping the section of the wall that hid her porn back in place. "By the way, that collar you got for Fang was waaaay too frilly."

"Oh, it didn't look like that when I bought it. I had it modified for me."

"That makes a lot more sense then..."

END OF CLOPPY STUFF. END OF CLOPPY STUFF.

"Right, well now that we're done.... Can I go get my son and play with my pets now?" I asked hopefully. Twilight rolled her eyes and chuckled a little.

"Ok, go ahead..."

"Yes!" I turned around, opened the door, and ran out, almost falling off the steps in my rush. Fang greeted me with a loud series of barks and an almost laughing grin. It almost seemed like he knew exactly what had happened, which he probably did. I saw Robin fly over from the top of the wooden horse head in the middle of the room and perch on my shoulder. "Oh good, we're all here! Time to go get Unity then!"

"Sharky! Wait!" Spike ran out of the kitchen and stopped next to me. "Whew! I didn't even realize you were here!"

"Oh good, I was a bit worried."

"Huh?"

"Nothing. Did you want something?"

"Yeah! Rarity had me stay an extra long time at her house today! We spent the whole time making something for you. She wants you to go get it when you can, ok?"

"Really? What'd you guys make?"

"Huh-uh, can't tell you." Spike teased with a broad grin. "Rarity said not to!"

"Awww c'mon! Are you sure you can't let it slip just this once? Man to man, you know?"

"Nope. I promised!"

"Oh darn! Stopped by a promise. Oh well. I'll stop by after I pick up Unity then. Thanks Spike!"

"No problem." As soon as I finished talking with Spike, I turned, opened the door, and left. I closed the door and turned once more to run of to Fluttershy's house, but I nearly tripped over something. I stumbled, regained my balance thanks to Fang grabbing my hand in his mouth and pulling back, and looked down to see my least favorite maroon news mare.

"No! No no no no no! Leave me alone!" I hissed at her before she could even open her mouth.

"Oh come on, just one little interview?" She begged.

"No! I just want to be left alone. I've already made it clear to all of you that I'm not interested."

"Ok, then how about this? Give me an interview, or I scream and call down all the other reporters in town just waiting to get to you!"

"What?! You wouldn't dare!"

She took in a sharp breath.

"Stop stop! Alright! Fine." I groaned under my breath while the mare smiled triumphantly. "I'll give you an interview... I just have to go get something first, ok?" The mare frowned at my words.

"How do I know you won't just run off, huh?"

"I promise! Look, as you know, that's my house." I pointed to the library. "Just knock on the door and tell whoever answers that I sent you, ok?"

"I want my brother to come too, for pictures of course." The mare motioned back to her cameraman. I hadn't really noticed him before, since he never spoke. He was a pale blue unicorn with a couple of blank photos for a cutie mark. He didn't look like he was supposed to be pale blue, he looked like his coat had faded, not grown that way. He looked really tired too. Now that I thought about it, the maroon mare did too. She was paler than when I had first met her.

"Sure, he can come... just don't take too many pictures. I'm camera shy. Anyway, gotta go bye!" I turned and took off running without another word. Fang took a few seconds to catch up with me and my robin clung to my shoulder stubbornly. I stopped running after a few seconds and slowly turned to look at Fang. "Alright boy, I got a job for you, 'kay?"

He nodded and perked up his ears to show he was listening.

"Go back to the house and sneak in. Keep a careful eye on that lady we just talked to and make sure she doesn't start trying to snoop through the house. If she does, chase her out."

He nodded again and I gave him an affectionate scratch behind the ears.

"Good boy. Go on now." Fang took off as I turned back in the direction of Fluttershy's house. I sprinted all the way to Fluttershy's house to get Unity, and we arrived in about 10 minutes. I knocked on the door and put on my best angry expression to mess with Fluttershy... I was having a little bit of trouble making an angry face though.

"Ugh! Can't even make a simple angry look! You'll never get anywhere like this! Let's see, what makes you mad... Oh! Your friend and marefriend were almost killed by assassins that you still have yet to track down the source of! Does that make you feel like a failure?"

Fluttershy opened the door right as my face finished contorting into a horrific scowl.

"Hey!" I shouted at Ravidos. Fluttershy stumbled and fell backward. She landed roughly on her flanks and curled into a little ball.

"Eeeeeeeeek!" She squeaked in fear. I quickly fixed my face and crouched down next to her.

"Oh geez! Sorry 'Shy! I didn't mean to scare you that bad!" I had wanted to mess with her a little by pretending I was mad she had kept Unity from me, not scare her stiff by screaming in her face. I waved my hands around in distress for a few seconds before doing the only thing I could think to do. I grabbed the statue-like pegasus in my arms and hugged her close to my chest. I stroked her mane soothingly as I held her in an effort to calm her down. I had the urge to caress her and kiss her head, maybe whisper that everything was alright. However, that seemed a bit inappropriate for our current relationship as friends. After a few minutes of hugging her stone-like body, she finally began to loosen up a bit.

"W-w-w-w-wh-why?" She whimpered into my chest, breaking my heart just a tiny bit.

"I didn't mean to frighten you like that Fluttershy... I'm sorry." I took a deep breath and began to explain my intentions. "I just wanted to mess with you a little bit. You know, for keeping my son from me."

"W-w-what y-y-ou did w-w-wasn't f-f-funn-n-ny... Y-you r-r-really sc-scared me..." Heart broke a little more.

"I know, that wasn't what I was planning to do, something went wrong..." I tried to explain weakly.

"W-why w-would you s-s-scare me at a-all?" She was sobbing now, not stuttering. My heart was now a collection of shattered bits and I had never felt like more of a dick.

"I-I didn't want to scare you at all, just mess with you. It was going to be harmless, I swear."

"T-t-then w-what happened?"

I took a deep breath and pondered how to actually explain it. I mean, what was I supposed to say? 'Well, I was actually yelling at a voice that speaks to me in my head.' Actually, that was pretty much the truth. I settled on that.

"Well, I had just wanted to make a mad face at you, but you ended up openeing the door right as I was screaming at a voice that exists only in my head."

"... O-ok, I trust y-you."

"Wait, what? You're not going to ask what I'm talking about or question the sense there?"

"N-no. If you s-say it's true, then it's true. I'm g-glad you weren't trying to frighten me like that." Fluttershy finally fully freed her body of all tenseness and relaxed in my arms. I felt my heart slowly piece itself back together as I released her and stood back up to my full height...

*WHACK* ...which caused me to smack my head on her doorway. I had forgotten I had stepped forward into the house to hold her. It didn't really hurt a lot, but I rubbed the back of my head and winced just the same.

"Are you ok?" Fluttershy asked softly. She didn't sound overly concerned. She sounded a little like she was trying not to laugh, actually.

"Yeah yeah, I'm fine. Anyway, I'm here to get my son back. You shouldn't have kept him from me, by the way." I grumbled as I finished rubbing my head. Fluttershy, instead of going to get Unity, gave me a curious stare.

"Why didn't you get here sooner? I thought for awhile you just weren't going to... umm... you know... do it. Did you... start late... or something?" Fluttershy's entire face was red. I wondered for a brief moment where Unity and the Golems were, but if Fluttershy was ok with talking about this, they likely weren't near.

"Uhhh no, why would you think that? We started almost right after we got your message."

Fluttershy's face grew redder, and her blush spread to her body a tiny bit.

"Oh... D-did you take a nap after?"

"No. Actually, we almost got caught by Spike and then I ran here. What're you getting at?"

"Oh... my..."

"What?"

"Nothing! Nothing... I-I'm next... right?"

"Huh?"

"My week... I'm next, right?" Fluttershy was leaning towards me and staring at me. I hadn't noticed until now.

"Yes. Why?"

"Nothing!" She quickly turned and started walking off into her house.

"Hey! My son!" I shouted after her.

"Just a moment! I'm getting him!"

I sighed and rubbed my eyes to relieve some of the pressure building behind them. Smacking my head on the doorway earlier was starting to give me a headache, and Fluttershy's confusing behavior wasn't helping. Soon enough though, she returned with a little bundle.

"Oh, there he is. Thanks 'Sh--

"Shhhh! He's sleeping!" Fluttershy whispered urgently. I gently placed a hand over my mouth and pinched my Robin's beak shut. She seemed to find me pinching the Robin's mouth shut kinda funny, because she stifled a giggle. She shook her head at me with a smile for a reason only known to her and hoofed Unity over to me. I released my mouth and cradled him with my free arm. I turned to be face-to-face with my robin.

"Wake him up, I will slap you off my shoulder. Got it?" I whispered.

He nodded.

"Good." I let go of his mouth and turned back to Fluttershy with a smile. "Thank you 'Shy. For taking care of him. All the time. I know I don't thank you much for it, but I'm sure you're working really hard and taking really good care of him."

"You're welcome. Any time you need my help, I'd be happy to watch him again. After all, I'm sure Twilight won't mind watching him a few times during our week... or the whole week... That... would be... nice.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" She was so quiet there towards the end I hadn't even heard her.

"Nothing!"

"Alright. I should get going then. Bye." I pivoted and started walking off towards the library.

"You'll understand soon..."

I would have shouted back to ask her what she had said, but Unity was in my arm. I just shrugged and kept walking. I rocked him in my arm a bit as I walked to the house. It suddenly struck me as odd that I had never seen Unity asleep at this hour. Then it suddenly struck me as odd that I hadn't realized it was pretty much night. Suddenly the stresses of the day all caught up to me at once, and I was dead tired. I yawned and stretched carefully so as to not disturb my son. Eventually, I got home and walked in with no trouble. There wasn't a sea of reporters waiting for me. I was ready to crawl into bed and rest, but...

"Oh good! You're here! Now we can start the interview!" The newsmare exclaimed excitedly.

.... "Wh...wh... Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" Unity cried. I placed him on the ground carefully, walked to the nearest wall, and headbutted it.

".... Great." I groaned.

Author's Notes:

I get the strangest urge to say 'Fu*k yeah motherfu*ker' in this little box. Strange, right?