Every heartbeat drummed in my ears, a constant thump thump thump while I did my best to affix it over my head.  Internally, I was screaming at myself and my stupidity.  'Rookie mistake you fuck stick!  Fuck  FUCK!'  So long as I could get the armored shell back on quickly, it would be okay.  Slimy grit and gore scraped against my skin as I forced the helmet on.  It wasn't straight, it wasn't clean, but lined up enough for the latches to catch as both hands forced the small levers into place with a sound click.  Most of my vision was obscured with the gore and dirt that graced the front of my helm.  The same offal that lovingly coated my face and neck in my haste.  Through the small areas that weren't smeared, I could get a sense of where I was at least.  As the small bundle of cables clicked into place, navigation markers burst into life on my displays.  A slightly distorted view of the world soon followed as I mentally triggered the cameras inset into the unit.  Out of everything, there was one thing that drove me from fear into anger.  The simple note that was still gently flashing in the corner of my vision.

***Please wait.  Attempting to allocate processing power to address your inquiry.

***You are user 2 of 4.  Your estimated wait time is between 2 and 5 minutes.

***Your requests are important to us.  Please continue to hold.  An AI will be with you shortly.

Quietly, I turned my back on the remains of the shattered city and shuffled toward the gaping hole behind me.  Step by tender step, I approached the cave entrance.  That is when something came to my attention.  A soft beeping that increased as I neared the caverns.  After a moment of contemplation, I realized why it was so familiar and easily forgotten.  When you get used to hearing a radiation detector beeping every second of every day, you just zone it out.  Still, it was enough to give me pause.  A few steps back, and the sound decreased.  A few yards and the unit was silent.  Interesting.

"Seven, are you working yet?  I could use some help here."

***Please wait.  Attempting to allocate processing power to address your inquiry.

***You are user 2 of 4.  Your estimated wait time is between 2 and 5 minutes.

***Your requests are important to us.  Please continue to hold.  An AI will be with you shortly.

"Damned computers are going to be the death of me..."

With only one way left to test my theory, I took off into the cavern that was my home for far too long.  The constant beeping quickly became my friend once more as the gaping edifice swallowed me whole.  When entering the chasm, the location made me happy the minotaurs did not seem to possess cannons or other siege weaponry.   From the entrance to the pony encampment was a straight line of sight.  For the record, I had my doubts that the massive creatures would be any threat now that there was something more for the ponies to fight for.  Celestia's recovery and the rescue of the prisoners seemed to do wonders for morale.  I did my best to hurry through the camp, but was still met with questions and comments as I was partially coated in blood once again.  They were all met with an upheld finger in the hopes that "hold on a minute" was universal.

Through the camp and into the tunnels I traveled.  Past the massive figures of waiting drones and through somewhat decluttered passages, three figures followed me.  Doing my best to ignore them, my pace quickened.  The sound of armored boots thumping to concrete contrasted wildly against the clicking of hooves in the distance as I contorted my body past a support drone welding brackets to the blasted door.  Soon enough, the ever familiar armored entrance to my vault awaited with opening doors.  Be it magic or the RFID chips imbedded in my armor, I didn't care.  Before I stepped through the gates, my waiting fingers flipped up a panel inset in the wall to press a large red button.  Following the same routine that was beaten into me from years of training, I stepped onto the faded yellow footprints painted on the floor and braced for what was to come.  I really hated this part.

Through the section around where I stood, a loud squeal rang out as amber lights flashed around.  There was a difference between radiation decon and foreign contaminants after all.  Through the strobing light and screaming noises, I could see two princesses come to a stop in the distance.  A haggard stallion stood with them with a mixture of curiosity and weariness on his face.  Then again, I imagine I didn't make too good of a first impression on him as I stood there yelling at the ceiling as the pipes above did little more than gurgle and choke instead of shower me with an assortment of chemicals.  Typical government engineering.  I guess I would have to do it all by hand.  With a squeal of tired metal, the drawer under the button opened to reveal a decon kit within.  Sighing softly to myself I reached in to get this mess over with.  The first sheet of many was tugged out of the drawer.  Whatever bureaucrat decided this needed to die.  What was the point of "emergency decon" if the system failed and you had to wipe down *everything* with a set of glorified paper towels?

At first, it had been frustrating.  Soon, it turned into far more than that when the buzzer and lights stopped and the ponies approached.  Twilight didn't seem content to let me be alone with my irritation, and proceeded to try to introduce myself to this "Shining Armor" fellow.  Truthfully, I just ignored the vast amount of what she was saying and mentally filed it away for later reference like so many safety briefs in my past life.  'No, First Sergeant I have no idea where my freaking reflective belt is after all this time.'  Eventually, I got enough gore off my helmet and chest to where it was safe to enter my unit.  Finally.  With a gesture to follow, I headed through the armored doors and waited for the room to be declared safe.  I'll admit that it was really hard not to laugh as the door shut and Twilight got a face full of compressed air when the nozzles powered up.  The sooner I could get this helmet off and clean my face, the better.  It was starting to reek of rotten gore pretty bad.

Idly, I dragged one of the aptly named 'M291 Chemical Decontaminating Wipes' around the base of my helmet and grimaced from the amount of gore pressed into the crevices.  It really didn't help that the kit I was using looked to have been made in the late 1980's.  Freaking government spending.  At least Shining Armor had stopped staring at me constantly.

"So let me get this right.  Shining is your brother, Captain of the guard, a crown prince, AND Cadence's husband?  You ponies have some weird fairyland standards on things."

All I could do was chuckle as the white stallion snorted at me.  Really wasn't a talkative one once the helmet came off.  Twilight and Cadence were making up for it with all sorts of questions.  It all boiled down to one thing.  Nobody knew why Seven was down.  None of the royals were keeping him busy with questions.  Everything had just cut off abruptly.  It left us in kind of a blind spot really, as the only sources of intel on the outside world were either in my upturned helmet or on the displays around the room.  Considering there were no drones in the air at the moment, that pretty much left a map of the city with the sensors overlaid on it.

"So here is a question for you three.  When I was outside, the sensors didn't show any of your 'magic' but started screaming when I came back into the cavern.  I don't suppose you could tell me what is going on with that, or is my gear just faulty like everything else down here?"

Little did I know this was going to turn into a lecture on magic while I scrubbed bits of minotaur off my visor.

"Magic permeates the world," Twilight began in a well rehearsed tone, "everything is coated in it.  It allows the pegasi to fly, the earth ponies to do their feats of strength, and unicorns to harness the energies around us.  Every pony is special in one field or another.  Cadence is love, and my brother's was in creating defensive barriers."

That last line cut off the snort of derision that was building at 'special power of love.'  

"Could you repeat that last bit one more time?

Before either of the princesses could answer, a somewhat masculine voice came from the corner where Shining sat.  I was wondering when he was going to say something, or even do something besides stare at stuff.  Then again, I wasn't about to get hung so I cut him some slack.

"My skill is magical shields and barriers.  Those few ponies and I kept a shield around the palace for two weeks before it fell and let the minotaurs in.  It was long enough for my wife, sister, and the remainder of the army to get away in any case."

Now that was something I could appreciate.  Smart enough to know when to hold, fold, and more importantly when to bluff.  That could be very useful in the long run for getting the hell out of this glorified cave.  Being able to create safe zones would be an incredible asset.

"Shining, you and I are going to have a long talk about tactics later.  I think we can come up with a few surprises for our friends upstairs.  First though, I need Twilight to spare her lecture and answer my question though.  What makes the cavern so different from the surface?  It's important."

After a moment's contemplation, the purple one answered in a way I didn't expect.

"To summarize, it would have to be that the caverns here contain the largest deposit of magical crystals we have found to date.  It is how we managed to keep the minotaurs at bay for so long, as the mage corps can tap into the stored energies of the world down here.  On the surface, it is just the passive magic of the world."

Before I could open my mouth to reply, the lights in the vault flickered and died.  Everything was cast into ruddy hues as the only source of illumination was crimson text flashing on the displays over and over as everyone looked around in concern.

CRITICAL FAILURE: AI CORE OFFLINE

CRITICAL FAILURE: AI CORE OFFLINE

CRITICAL FAILURE: AI CORE OFFLINE

CRITICAL FAILURE: MAIN POWER OFFLINE

CRITICAL FAILURE: MAIN POWER OFFLINE

CRITICAL FAILURE: MAIN POWER OFFLINE

From the black, a condescending voice trickled forth, like oil on water.

"Well isn't this just a delightful complication..."

"DISCORD!  What did you do this time?!"

My helmet met the floor with a loud clatter as I rose to my feet.  Hands grasping the grip of my slung rifle, it naturally found a home braced against a shoulder.  With little more than two small gestures, light burst from the flashlight attached near the muzzle and the safety clicked off while I whirled toward the corner the voice slithered from.

"Oh, but I'm not over there dear human.  I'm over here."

I'll openly admit that fear was kicking in a little bit as whatever this thing was played with us.  As I turned back and forth trying to find the voice, it took everything I had not to muzzle sweep the ponies.  Everytime I turned toward that gritty voice, its location would change."

"You know, it is rude not to introduce a friend.  Don't you remember that lesson PRINCESS Twilight?  I might just play with our human friend until you do what friends should."

"Ugh..."

The new noise caused me to spin on a heel, brightly outlining the three ponies in the glare of the weapon light.  Just a moment, but a moment none the less where a large caliber weapon was pointed squarely at the trio.  Without thought, my thumb snapped the safety back on and dropped the tip of the rifle toward the floor.

"Shit!  Sorry guys.  You know this Joker?!"

Through the shadows cast by the light I could see all three of the ponies fidgeting uncomfortably.  As the same irritating voice came from behind the trio.

"Oh, I'm sure they could regale you with many stories of our adventures.  The time they froze me in stone is good.  I rather do enjoy the ballad of the Blue Flu, although I do understand why these three are still somewhat irritated about it.  My personal favorite is that one time that I helped Luna find a book that would lead Twilight to a secret catacomb below Canterlot.  Then she doesn't have the gall to even say hello after I lead the minotaurs on a wild chase to help the ponies escape."

Naturally, this is a perfect time for my weapon light to flicker and die.  Thankfully, from the darkness a small orb of light burst to life.  Before I even had a chance to panic about magic and my death, Discord spoke again.

"Yes yes, I do know your aversion to magic.  This is much more mundane than that.  I just borrowed the batteries from your flashlight for a moment so I could do something."

From the small pool of light, a being that I really don't know how to describe stepped forth.  Not out of the light really, the light just flowed off of it like water from someone getting out of a pool.  Discord itself was...something.  A patchwork of animals in a grotesque design.  Where I assumed there would be frankenstein style sutures, the flesh just flowed together naturally.  Either way, it was disconcerting as anything I'd experienced before to see a true chimera of nature strutting about.  Even stranger was a simple red toolbox clutched in one of his hands.

"So, lets see what we can do about that power failure and pesky AI, shall we?"