Alright, before we begin, I’d like for you to know, I write this for me. Not for you. Throughout my life I’ve made countless mistakes, I’ve made constant choices, and I’ve made constant…corrections…I write this so I’ll never forget my past, which burdens me such. I know of many who have a sadder life than mine, but they were born into it. To them, suffering was life, and happiness was just a break from it. I had no way of preparing for the pain I received…I write this so I’ll always know what I’ve done, and to know what I’ll never do again…But I suppose you don’t care about that…Very well, I suppose I’ve wasted enough of your time…I suppose I’ll begin…

                                                               Spectrum’s Truth

I wasn’t like a lot of other fillies when I was young. I was born into wealth. Born into a family of patrons of the arts, supporters and creators alike, I was thought to be above the rest when I was born, before anybody could even know me, or my name. I had three sisters and two brothers, as my parents said, ‘More people means a higher success rate.’ …when I was a child, I thought nothing of this…It took a long time for me to understand that they thought of me, their daughter, as a mere pawn to use to their own advantage. Before I understood, I went along with it. Bing rich, it was a nice life, though it lacked emotion. I had what I could want, my siblings as well.  I went to the most exclusive art school in all of equestrian, but the colors all seemed grey to me…no matter who was there…or who talked to me…or whoever would guide my brush…I was utterly….alone…

Eventually I reached adolescence, and shed the shell of my childlike attitudes. I had a few friends who I could actually call such, as I knew almost everyone in the town. We would go to shows, go over to each other’s houses…except to mine of course…I didn’t want anybody there…my house was hell to me. It was bland, except for sections littered with red. It was full of nothing. And at the same time, It was full of hate. My siblings fought, but not the way one would expect. They fought as if they were competitors in a business, not like they were family at all. They even tried to ruin each other…They spread rumors, they destroyed each other’s works, and I was subject to this too….for a small time that is. Eventually, with lack of motivation, and reason to work, I halted my artistic exploits…No matter what colors I would use…the canvas remained grey in my eyes. My family now saw me, not as a child with a ruined life, but as somebody who no longer had the chance to replace them. I was truly…miserable…

Eventually, my activity died down so much, my parents refused to pay for my classes. The classes themselves were awful….all they did was cram lies down your throat…but I tried to object to my parents decision, nonetheless, as my classes were my only chance to escape the dark cloud, looming overhead, and be with friends. When I was with them….it was the only time I even had enough emotion and will left to shift my mouth into what I could somewhat consider a smile. I was able to keep them paying for my school bills for another month, but my work was failing, and after that month, not only did they stop paying any bills they already forced upon me, but they kicked me out as well…They just….threw me out….that was the day I finally realized how absolutely…worthless…useless…miserable I actually was…it was the day that my family left my life forever. They didn’t care for me, so why should I, them?

After being forced out of what I thought to be my home, I thought I would be able to stay with some friends of mine. I was right for the most part. I stayed with my closest of friend in my tight-knit group. Her name was Sapling, I believe her parents named her that for some sort of deep meaning I was never told, but I can’t be sure. I thought staying with them would be nice. I would be away from my ‘family’ and with friends. And she was the only child of her family too. If I grew up with a family that was easily able to support six children, I believed my time with Sapling would be some of the nicest in my life…I was more than wrong…She was poor. Beyond poor. She and her parents were living in absolute poverty. They had nearly nothing….and they still welcomed me with open arms…I couldn’t believe it…after my first week there, I worked up enough courage to ask her why she hadn’t asked for money from me or the others of our group. That’s when I learned that she wasn’t alone in being poor. Every time I came over to their houses, they fixed every crack and dent, only to be able to not afford to keep it that way, and have it fall apart again. I was the only one of our group who had the wealth it was believed everyone had. All of my friends…poor…struggling to send themselves to a good school…and they still welcomed me…a sad filly, who wasn’t even going to school anymore…I couldn’t….I couldn’t stand it…So…I left.

I was a burden to them, and they thought so too, though they were far too kind to say that to me. It was night. Around three weeks into my staying there. I simply opened the window in my room, and climbed out. I didn’t even leave a note for them…I didn’t even say goodbye…or thank you…if I could ever see them again…never mind. I didn’t grab any possessions, for I had none. I didn’t even take any food. They needed it more. I could live on the streets on my own…it was my fault this happened anyway…that’s what I thought at least. For a whole year, I roamed streets, stealing food from those who could afford it easily, and never even making eye contact with poor. After staying with Sapling, I couldn’t stand to look into anybody’s eyes….nobody’s…I looked at the ground whenever my eyes were open. For that year, I even forgot what color the sky was…but to me it was grey…everything….was grey…