The fifteenth of Septem-

“FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK LOOK OUT BELOOOOOOW!”

CRASH

...ber.

My landing was heralded by the kicking up of dirt, leaves, sticks, and literally anything else that was within two feet of where I made a three-inch imprint into the ground. I wasn't sure exactly what that was, on account of the fact that I had my eyes closed and was deafening myself with a combination of streams of cuss words and very feminine-sounding screaming.

“Arrell!” somepony yelled. I felt a hoof on my side and hissed in pain, causing them to pull away. “Wh-what...what just…”

They would learn the context later, but for now, I'll tell it to you rather than leave you confused. Still unable to fly, I thought I had finally gotten a hoof on how to do it when I managed to hover above the ground for a few second. So naturally, my first instinct was to climb a giant tree in the Everfree Forest and jump off.

Emphasis on giant.

To put it simply, that tree had a lot of branches that cracked against me as I fell, leaving cuts and bruises all over my body. Not to mention the landing itself, which probably doubled that total. Sure, I had been in battles before and sustained all sorts of injuries, but most of the time, I was expecting the attacks and was able to brace myself. Plus, I was fueled by adrenaline that kept me going. Here, all I did was fall out of a tree, and now I was swearing and screaming at the ground.

If I sound like a wimp, let me remind you: it was a giant tree. Emphasis on giant. The fall itself took over half a minute.

The pony who had put a hoof on me before retracting it seemed to talk to somepony else, then I felt the somewhat familiar aura of magic surround my body. I was lifted up with a noticeable lack of difficulty and placed on somepony's back, where my body went limp as I lost consciousness.

“Clap. Clap. Clap. Applause, applause. Well done.”

I sighed. “Thank you, GLaDOS.”

Styx smirked. “You just jumped out of a tree of your own free will. Don’t expect me to let you live this down.”

“I’m surprised this is all you plan on never letting me live down.” I sat down. “Of course, it wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t taken away my ability to fly and thus severely hampering my competence in the process all for the sake of making things more difficult for me for plot convenience.”

“...plot whatnow?”

“Forget it. Just ignore those last three words.”

“...right. But you know what? You punched me, you can live with it.”

I groaned. “Of course...”

On the bright side, she seemed to be doing much better now. She didn’t look as tired or ragged as before, and clearly was in a better mood. I assumed she had had time to rest.

“So, I just wanted to give you a little update on the pseudo-goddess,” she continued. “She’s gonna be visiting you the next time you sleep after you’ve recovered. I won’t be there, so you’ll be on your own with her. That’ll let you two have a proper introduction.”

“Great. I’m going to meet a random shy girl for the first time, with no one else around, and I’m already in a relationship. This won’t be awkward at all.”

Styx shrugged. “It’s only awkward if you make it awkward.”

They found the article while I was unconscious and recovering. A diamond pickaxe from Minecraft, just like I expected. Able to break apart ground, walls, and literally any other inanimate object into perfect cubes, which could then be placed elsewhere exactly as they were. Some burglar pony had found it and been planning to use it to rob ponies, but he got hungry, and used it for something as mundane as getting some apples. It wasn’t hard to find him after that, since all they had to do was follow the path of perfectly-removed blocks.

At least my broken body had kept me from helping in cleaning up the town by putting stuff back. Of course, that wasn’t all it kept me from doing. I was stuck in bed, never able to stay conscious for more than a few moments when they woke me up to shove food or water down my throat, and then I was out like a light again.

Finally, I woke up of my own accord. My whole body felt numb, but I wasn’t in any pain. Glancing around, I saw that I was in a strange wooden room with odd tribal masks on the walls. Instantly, I came to the conclusion that I was in Zecora’s hut.

I tried to move my limbs, but they barely responded. Looking down, I saw that my torso was completely wrapped in bandages, and my hooves had a fair amount of wrapping on them as well. However, what confused me was that from under each section of bandages came a small rubber tube, which was connected to a bag of purple liquid nearby. It reminded me of an IV drip from back home, except it didn’t seem to be powered by anything. It just...worked.

I chalked it up to either cartoon magic or weird herbs and sat up, very slowly. I felt a hoof on my shoulder from behind all of a sudden and gasped.

“Don’t move too much,” I heard Risk’s voice warn me. “If those tubes get disconnected, you’re in trouble.”

I blinked. “...what?”

“He means you’ll put yourself in danger,” False clarified, stepping into my view. “When you fell out of the tree, you didn’t just get cut and bruised. You landed in a pretty dangerous plant.”

“Poison Joke?”

“Much worse than Poison Joke,” Risk replied. “Zecora refers to it as something in her own native language, which we obviously don’t understand, so False called it the one-day leaf. Which I still think is a pretty bland name.”

False glared at him. “It makes sense, and that’s what matters.”

“Um...what does the ‘one-day leaf’ do? Because I really don’t like the sound of it.”

Risk sighed. “Basically...within a day of touching it, it starts rotting away your skin and bones until it’s completely disintegrated your body, except for the vital organs, which just collapse with nothing to support them.”

“...oh. Um...gross. So, uh...that liquid coming through the tubes...it’s a cure, right?”

False shook her head. “It’s just a deterrent. There is no cure, but if it gets deterred for long enough after touching the leaf but before it starts taking effect, your body will just develop a natural immunity to it.”

“So just lie there for a while and don’t move too much,” Risk said with a chuckle. “Zecora says it should only be another day or two. It’s already been...what, a week?”

My eyes widened. “...how have I been unconscious for a whole week?”

“That’s the deterrent,” False explained. “It keeps you asleep, unless forcefully awoken. The one-day leaf only affects you when you’re fully awake.”

I blinked. And blinked again. “...you mean...like I am...now?”

There was a silence. Finally, Risk broke it. “...how did we not realize that before?”

“Never mind! Just get Zecora!”

I started to feel lightheaded, and my vision went blurry. My back legs, which previously were just numb, suddenly began to lose all feeling entirely. My hearing started to fade.

“...not the deterrent…!”

“...broke in...”

“...who would...”

My consciousness faded away once again. But this time, I didn’t dream.