Chapter 3: Making Friends is Hard

The door to the grounded cloud home swung open, allowing three figures in. The first was Rainbow Dash, followed closely by her adoptive daughter, Scootaloo, and finally Ponyville's newest resident, Discord.

“So, this is going to be your home for a while,” Rainbow said, before she started pointing out the home's facilities. “Kitchen's in there, the bathroom through that door, and your bedroom's up here.”

She lead the draconequus upstairs, to a newly constructed room at the end of the hall.

“Right here,” Rainbow announced as she opened the door.

The white haired stallion trudged in and crawled onto the bed.

“So...” Rainbow began awkwardly. “Dinner'll be ready pretty soon.”

“I'm not hungry,” Discord said, unfeelingly.

“Oh... well, it'll be down here when you are.” Rainbow waited for a reply for a few seconds before slowly closing the door.

She and Scootaloo made their way downstairs and collapsed on the couch.

Scootaloo turned to her mother and asked, “Are you sure that's the same Discord? He seems... different.”

Rainbow sighed. “That's Discord, alright, but he's definitely not the same one.”

“Or this is just a ruse and he's just waiting to strike,” Scootaloo observed.

Rainbow's gaze went up, starring in the direction of their new ward. “Maybe... but I doubt it.”

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

While their first date was as spectacular as Applebloom always hoped it would be, their second was far more... Awkward.

The restaurant was nice, nothing too fancy, just a local diner near the Ponyville Market. Midnight and Twilight were having a good time, but that wasn't the problem. The problem was a certain princess of the night getting wind and insisting on making it a double date. At least Big Mac seemed to share her sentiment on the subject.

“And I shall have the 'country fried oat-steak', good sir,” Princess Luna finished their round of orders.

The lunar princess was currently disguised as a midnight blue pegasus named Starry Sky with a star ringed cloud for a cutie mark. It was the same disguise she usually wore when she didn’t want to be recognized.

As the waiter left to place their order, Luna turned and asked the youngest of their group with a smirk, “So, Dame Applebloom, is it everything you dreamed it would be?”

Applebloom, understandably, hesitated. “Uh... Ah suppose. Ah mean, Ah'm happy with everything, but it is kinda weird, ya know, knowin' how Ah'm datin' a pony Ah used to look at like a big sister, and one Ah used to see like a big brother.”

“Oh, so it's weird being with us?” Twilight asked, teasingly.

Applebloom rolled her eyes, a little smile on her face, “You know what Ah mean, Twi. To be honest, it's also kinda weird knowing that... well... Ah'm actually fallin' in love with a mare.”

“Aww, thank you, Applebloom,” Twilight blushed a little. “I'm falling for you, too. You're a wonderful mare. Of course, I'm sure that's no surprise to your big brother, here.” She shot a teasing look at the silent giant.

“So, what about you two?” Midnight asked. “Are you two going to be announcing your relationship anytime soon?”

“We have decided to do so upon the Winter Solstice,” Luna answered. “It is a special holiday to me, and I can think of no better time to reveal ourselves.”

“It sounds romantic,” Applebloom said, approvingly. “Ah can't wait for the weddin'.”

“Oh, I know!” Twilight agreed, excitedly. “I mean, my brother's wedding was big, but this is the first time one of the Royal Sisters has been married in six hundred years! Oh, are you going to invite Trixie?”

“Trixie? Ain't that the mare that caused all that trouble some years back?” Big Mac pondered out loud. “Why would we invite her?”

“Yeah,” Applebloom chimed in. “Ah get she turned over a new leaf, and what not, but Ah don't think Big Mac knows her too well, do ya?”

“Oh, she would be my guest,” Luna explained, “being the descendant of my daughter, Lulamoon, and my closest living relative beside Tia.”

Big Mac's eyes shot wide at the realization, “So... she's gonna be mah step-great-great-however-many-times-great-granddaughter?”

“Yes,” was the princess's simple reply.

“That's gonna take some getting' used to.”

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

“Alright, first thing first, you need to see how ponies interact with each other,” Rainbow said as she lead Discord through town.

“And how am I going to do that?” asked the former spirit of chaos.

“Easy,” Rainbow said, grinning smugly. “I asked Pinkie to arrange a party for you. It's not going to be very big, but it should help you get used to how ponies do things.”

“And if I do something that I shouldn't?” Discord asked.

“That's what I'm here for,” said Rainbow, puffing out her chest in pride.

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

Five ponies walked leisurely through the streets of Ponyville, admiring the beautiful afternoon.

“That was a wonderful meal,” Luna said with a happy sigh. “As much as the chefs at the palace delight me, there is just something about the more common food.”

“It’s the love they put into it,” Midnight said. “They aren't making food because someone important needs to be impressed, they make it because they want ponies to enjoy the food itself.”

“Eeyup,” agreed Big Mac.

“Well, perhaps I shall bring Tia here, if she hasn't already been,” said Luna.

“So,” Twilight began, shifting the conversation. “Are you two going to come with us to Discord's welcome party?”

Luna's expression shifted ever-so-briefly to a scowl before going back a more neutral look. “No, I do not believe I am ready to face Discord peacefully, at the moment. Instead, I believe Sir Macintosh and I shall find a more secluded location to enjoy the more pleasurable aspects of a relationship.”

“Eww,” Applebloom gagged. “Ah don't need to hear 'bout that.”

Luna giggled as she and her date walked back to town, leaving the others to walk to Sweet Apple Acres alone.

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

“I don't know what to do,” Discord whispered to Rainbow Dash, his panic rising.

“Just have fun,” she said back.

Discord gave the mare a flat stare. “Fun to me would be bringing the furniture to life and having it sit on ponies, but something tells me that wouldn't be taken well... Plus, I'm rather lacking in the power department, for that.”

“Oh, right. Well, let's start with mingling,” Rainbow advised.

“I thought hurting others was bad,” Discord replied, giving her a confused look.

“She said 'mingle', not 'mangle',” came another voice.

Rainbow looked up and smiled. “Twilight!” she exclaimed, giving the purple unicorn a friendly hug. “Thank Celestia you're here. We could really use your egg-head-ness.”

“You seem to be doing well on your own,” Twilight said. “Mingling is actually a great place to start. After all, the first step to making new friends is just saying 'hello'.”

“So what exactly is 'mingling' and how does one do it?” Discord asked.

“Simply put, it's casual conversation in a social setting, like a party, usually with those you don't already know.” Twilight explained.

“So... I just talk to ponies?” Discord asked.

“Pretty much, yeah,” Rainbow confirmed.

“And what do I talk about?” asked Discord.

“Whatever comes to mind,” answered Twilight.

Discord hesitated for another few seconds before taking his first step towards who would hopefully be a new friend, a light olive mare with a two tone gamboge mane, with Rainbow close behind for support.

The two stared awkwardly at one another for a moment, forced grins plastered on their faces.

“What do I say?” Discord whispered to Rainbow out of the corner of his mouth.

Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Introduce yourself.”

“Oh...” He turned back to the mare and said, “I'm... Discord, spirit... Former spirit of chaos.”

“Um... Junebug, perfumer,” the mare replied. “I... make perfume... from exotic flowers.”

Once again, the two fall into an awkward silence until Discord finally said, “I once made a flower that smells like two week old rotten diapers.”

Rainbow could only facehoof. Maybe he would have better luck with somepony else.

“Really? You mean the south sea stink lily? I actually have one of those in my garden. They're gorgeous, despite their smell. I've always seen it as a perfect example of the polarity of nature.”

Rainbow peeked over her hoof, a look of pure disbelief in her eyes.

“Thank you, you're the first pony to get where I was going with that. Ponies are so obsessed with external beauty they forget that even beautiful things can be awful.”

Junebug smiled. “Especially when it comes to wild nature, outside pony control.”

That... that actually worked? She allowed a small, hopeful smile. This just might turn out better than I thought.

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

With his confidence boosted by such a successful first interaction, Discord threw himself into more and more... With disastrous results.

As the stallion he was just speaking to stormed off in fury, Discord couldn't help but ask, “What did I say?”

As Rainbow was too busy groaning into her hooves, Twilight took the liberty of explaining, “Offering to stuff a pony's sick loved ones after they pass is... well, it's not considered very nice.”

“But, if he loves her, why wouldn't he want her around forever?”

“Because it's creepy as fuck.”

“Scootaloo, language!”

Twilight turned and smiled at the pair of fillyhood friends approaching their small group. “Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, have you come to assist our new... friend in learning proper pony interaction?”

“She did,” Scootaloo replied. “I just came to see him struggle.”

“Not cool, Scoots,” Rainbow admonished.

Scootaloo scoffed. “Well, excuse me. After everything he's done, I think I should get to smile at his misfortune, for once.”

“You say that like he did something to you,” Rainbow said, angrily.

“Duh, he did,” Scootaloo argued.

“No he didn't,” Sweetie said. “You, me, and Applebloom were all in that diner with Cheerlie and the rest of the class. Discord never did anything there, and we never even saw him.”

Scootaloo 'glared' at her friend. “No he...” her hard expression turned into confusion. “He did... didn't he?”

“No, he left us alone.”

“I... I need to go,” Scootaloo said, brow furrowed in thought, before she ran out the door.

“What the hay was that about?” Rainbow asked no one in particular.

“I don't know,” Sweetie answered anyway. “She's been acting like that all day.”

“Why would she say Discord messed with you guys when he didn't?” Rainbow asked.

“Maybe she just had nightmares about it?” Sweetie ventured, not really believing it.

“Whatever the reason, I'm sure it's not too bad,” Twilight spoke up. “I'll talk to her later. Come on, Discord, we can still show you how to make friends.”

“Yes... I'm coming,” Discord replied absentmindedly. His mind was following the young mare that had just stormed out.

Author's Notes:

I wasn't aware of this, but it seems the comics already hinted at Luna x Big Mac. Though, I doubt their relationship would have gone anywhere in that.