I stood there in the doorway of the library, looking down at the plate of cooked meat at my feet with a bemused expression on my face. Slowly, my gaze drifted up and I eyed the two nervous ponies standing on the other side of the entrance way.

Rarity and Rainbow both shifted—clearly uncomfortable—causing their hooves to sink a bit deeper into the snow beneath them. They looked at each other quickly before returning their attention to me, strained smiles upon their faces. Every few seconds, Rainbow’s tail would twitch, as if she was trying to swat an invisible fly.

I just continued to eye them, chewing on the inside of my cheek. My eyes flicked down to the steaming piece of meat again, my eyebrow raising slightly. Okay, ignoring the fact that they not only found meat, but cooked it as well, what are they up to?

Keeping my eyes on the scene before me, I slowly leaned over and opened a drawer on the small table beside the door. Pulling out a notebook and charcoal stick I had stashed there, I closed the drawer with a soft 'click'. Flipping to a clean page, I placed the tip of the charcoal stick on the page and began to write.

+Okay, I’ll bite. What do you two want?+

After reading the message, Rarity’s smile grew even more strained, if that was at all possible. Rainbow’s wings twitched at her side, and she whined softly.

“Darling,” Rarity said with exaggerated confusion. “What could possibly make you think we want something from you?” I gave a pointed look at the meat, and she chuckled apprehensively.

“Well, I can see where you might get an idea like that, but that’s no reason for you to assume that we are just doing this to get something out of it. This is simply a kind gesture between friends.” Beside her, Rainbow nodded quickly.

A kind gesture, my ass, I snorted. If that’s the kind of game they wanted to play, I was fine with playing along. Glancing between the two mares, I just shrugged and reached down to grab the plate of meat. Straightening up, I smiled and nodded to them in thanks before beginning to close the door.

“WAIT!” I paused before opening the door again, smirking down at the two flustered mares.

“Fine,” Rarity grumbled. “We were hoping you’d do something for us.” I raised an eyebrow, waving my hand to indicate she should continue.

“Well, you see… we were hoping that, if you wouldn’t mind, and of course feel free to say no, but we were hoping that you might be so kind as to… well—”

“Come on, Rarity, stop beating around the bush,” Rainbow huffed suddenly, cutting off her companion. Turning, Rainbow leapt into the air, hovering in front of me.

“Okay, dude, here’s the deal. There’s a human show going on in Ponyville, and we want to enter you in it,” she said bluntly, crossing her forelegs in front of her chest as she looked at me. I blinked in surprise, before narrowing my eyes at her.

+And why should I agree to this?+ I asked.

“Because we gave you meat!” Rainbow said loudly, pointing at the plate in my hands.

“And because,” Rarity added, giving her companion an annoyed look. “There is a twelve-thousand bit prize for the first place winner. We’d be willing to split it with you, of course.”

+You just want the bits, don’t you?+

“The bits might have crossed my mind,” Rarity said, eyeing her hoof, not looking at me. I turned to look at Rainbow, eyeing her curiously.

+Why are YOU doing it?+

“One of the managers of Canterlot’s weather team, Winter Cold, is signing her human up for the show,” she grumbled. “At the last manager meeting in Cloudsdale, she kept going on about how her human was sure to win, and how her human was the best.

"...need to put her in her place,” she added with a grumble.

I frowned slightly. Winter Cold… why does that name sound familiar? I thought about it for a few minutes before mentally shrugging and returned to the conversation at hand.

+Since I’m intelligent, doesn’t that mean that this would count as cheating?+

“Please, it’s only cheating if we get caught,” Rainbow smirked, rolling her eyes.

“Besides, darling,” Rarity added, “it’s a human show, and you are a human.” I tapped on my chin before writing one last question.

+How are we splitting the prize money if we win?+

“Four-thousand bits each,” Rainbow said, her wings quivering as she hovered.

+50-25-25+

“No way!” the pegasus whined. “Even thirds.”

+You’re asking me to demean myself for your personal gain. 50-25-25, or go ask Applejack for a human+

“40-30-30, because we got you meat,” Rarity said, eyeing the steaming piece of meat on the plate in my hands. I blinked a couple of times as I glanced down at the meat. After staring at it for several seconds, I shrugged before picking up the meat and taking a bite out of it. What the heck, I’ve got nothing better to do today.

+Deal+ I wrote out before closing the notebook. Turning, I shoved it into my bags which were hanging off the nearby coat rack. Buckling the bags around my waist, I pulled on my hooded sweater and slipped on my sandals. I had tried to get a pair of boots from Rarity, but we soon found out that, due to her unwillingness to cater to humans after Sweetie Belle’s accident, Rarity had no experience making boots for humans. She promised to find out how to make me a pair as quickly as possible, but in the meantime, I was stuck with what I had: a pair of sandals.

I was unsure of how I was going to survive the winter with only my sandals to protect my feet from the elements until Rarity made the boots. I lucked out, however, as Twilight was able to quickly come up with a solution after I told her about my problem. She had magically enchanted my sandals with a spell that allowed me to wear them out in the snow without my feet getting cold. Even though my toes were exposed to the winter weather, it felt like I was wearing thick, woolen boots. The only downside was that she needed to renew the enchantment every couple of days, or else it would wear off. It also caused the sandals to wear down faster than they would normally.

Picking up the meat, I tossed the plate onto the coffee table before exiting the library. As I closed the door behind me, I took another bite from the meat, chewing it happily. It was surprisingly good, although it needed more seasoning in my opinion.

I finished off the meat as we headed towards the market, sucking my fingers to get all of the juice off of them. The sun was out and it was a surprisingly warm day. Foals were out, running around and playing in the snow, their parents watching them from the warmth of their homes.

As we walked, Rarity chatted quietly with me, explaining how the show was going to work, as Rainbow hovered nearby.

“Now, these shows tend to judge humans in several different ways. They judge on appearance, behavior, whether the human is aggressive or not, and how well they can be trained. We should be fine for all of them, but do try and be on your best behavior, okay?” I gave her an annoyed look, to which she just rolled her eyes. “You know what I mean.”

“This is going to be awesome!” Rainbow cooed, doing flips in the air. “I’m going to rub Winter’s face in this when we win!”

“You mean ‘if’ we win, darling,” Rarity chided.

“Come on, Rarity! How can we not win with the big guy here?” she asked, patting me on the shoulder. “We’re guaranteed first place!”

“Don’t count your dragons before they hatch,” Rarity said, shaking her head with a smile.

We had just reached the market when something moderately heavy landed on my back.

“There you are,” a voice cooed in my ear as something wrapped around my neck. Grunting in surprise, I looked behind me, glaring at the black pegasus now clinging to my shoulders.

“Where do you think you’re heading off to?” Avera asked, grinning smugly at me.

I growled, taking a swipe at her from over my shoulder. She ducked down, laughing as she dodged the halfhearted attack. Pushing off of my back, she took to the air, flying lazily in front of us. Rainbow and Rarity eyed her nervously, unsure of what to do.

“We’re just taking Max out for a little walk through town,” Rarity said lamely, trying her best to seem casual. “Just a little time between friends.”

“Really?” Avera asked, raising an eyebrow. “And would that time amongst friends include participating in a human show?” At her words, Rarity and Rainbow sagged visibly.

“Look,” Rainbow said quietly, “you can’t tell anypony about this, okay?”

“Okay, I won’t,” Avera said, leaning back and placing her hooves behind her head. As Rarity and Rainbow breathed a sigh of relief, she smiled smugly, “but, you have to let me go with you.”

“What?!” Rarity yelped, gaping at the pegasus. “Definitely not!”

“Yeah, we’ve already got the details worked out!” Rainbow added hotly.

“Do those details include what would happen if Twilight found out that you two not only had her human participate in a human show, but go out in public without one of his guards to accompany him?” Avera asked, the smirk still on her face.

Rainbow glared at the black pegasus before sighing and hanging her head in defeat. “Fine. What do you want?”

“Oh, relax. I don’t want any part of the prize,” Avera said, landing back on my shoulders. “I just want to come along for the ride. It’s boring at the library, what with Primrose sleeping and Ebony, Spike and Twilight out at City Hall helping the mayor with some technical details concerning Hearth’s Warming.”

Rainbow opened her mouth to say something but I cut her off. Shaking my head at her, I turned to look at Avera.

~You can tag along, but no funny business~

“No worries, tall stuff. I just need something to do today,” she said, draping herself across my back in a lazy fashion. Rolling my eyes, I turned and motioned for Rarity and Rainbow to continue walking as Avera got comfortable on my back.

The noise was the first thing that hit me as we entered the warehouse reserved for the show. The building was full of ponies, most of whom were from out of town, judging by the fact that I had never seen most of them before in Ponyville.

Ponies flitted here and there, working to put the final touches to whatever was needed to get the show started. Humans dotted the area, some being used by ponies to move large equipment, while others were sitting by their owners, waiting for the show to start. I noticed immediately that the majority of humans in the warehouse were female.

Upon entering the warehouse, Rarity had hurried off to get me signed up for the show, leaving Avera and Rainbow to ‘watch’ me.

“A lot of ponies here,” Avera commented from my back as she looked around.

“Yeah, and they’re all about to get their flanks kicked,” Rainbow snarked, a look of confidence on her face. The look disappeared and a silent grimace flashed across her muzzle as her eyes locked onto someone in the crowd. Leaning slightly to the side, I placed my head next to hers, trying to see who she was glaring at. After a few seconds, I saw the pony in question.

Ah, so that’s Winter Cold. Now I remember, I thought as I eyed the mare. She was the unicorn that Twilight and I had bumped into on the train during our first trip to have dinner with her folks. Her light gray coat was immaculately clean, her blue mane done up in a bun. Her human, Brutus, sat beside her, staring off into the distance.

I scrunched up my face as I stared at the pair. Turning to look at Rainbow, I found her blushing as she stared at me, her face inches from mine. I raised an eyebrow and gave her a confused look.

“Do you have to be so close?” she asked me. I just shook my head, snorting in amusement as I leaned back.

After a few minutes, Rarity reappeared, weaving her way through the crowd. As she neared, she gave us a big smile.

“Everything’s ready to go,” she said happily. “Now we just need to wait for the judges to start.”

“How did you get the forms necessary for registration?” Avera asked, cocking her head to the side. “I’m pretty sure you need a medical form from a veterinarian showing that the human is healthy.”

“Why is that a problem?” Rainbow asked. “Max is healthy.”

“Yes, and he also has different vitals than an Equestrian human,” Avera replied.

“Oh, that doesn’t matter, darling,” Rarity said, waving a hoof at her. “I gave the forms to Applejack and had her fill them out using one of her humans.” Slipping a hand discreetly into my bags, I pulled out my notebook.

+Ignoring the fact you convinced the Element of Honesty to fill out false forms, did I mention already that this is totally cheating?+

“As long as you keep your notebook to yourself, nopony will ever know,” Rarity replied with a huff. “Now, would you kindly put this on, darling?” I caught the collar she tossed at me and turned it around in my hands, studying it. It was just a regular collar, made from a black plastic material. On one side of the collar was a white tag that bore the number ‘13’ on it in bold black numbers.

As I strapped the collar around my neck, Avera eyed it curiously. “What’s that for?”

“During the show, humans must wear collars. The number indicates that Max is the thirteenth human registered,” Rarity explained. “Oh, and one more thing.” Her horn glowed briefly and my clothing was encased in a blue glow. Slowly, Twilight’s cutie mark disappeared from the clothing, leaving them bare.

Yeah, totally cheating, I smirked, eyeing the patch of cloth that used to hold the mark of my owner.

Suddenly, a bell chimed out, echoing around the warehouse. Rarity perked up at the sound. “Oh, it appears that they’ve started the judging.” Opening her saddlebags, Rarity pulled out a brush, a comb, and a pair of scissors, holding them in her magic.

As she started to approach me, I took a step back, eyeing her warily. This just caused Rarity to tsk, rolling her eyes.

“Come now, darling,” she huffed. “The first stage of judging is on the human’s appearance. I need to make you look presentable before it’s your turn.”

Slowly, I lowered myself to the ground, sitting cross-legged on the brushed dirt. Smiling happily, Rarity trotted over to me and began to run the brush and comb through my hair, using the scissors to trim up any part that was getting too long.

As she worked, I placed my notebook in my lap, quickly writing out a message when I was sure no one was watching.

+You put any ribbons in my hair, and I’m leaving+

“Don’t worry,” she said upon reading the note. “I know when ribbons are appropriate and when they aren’t. We just have to make you look presentable. We won’t win any prizes if you go out looking like a ruffian. That would be the worst possible thing that could happen.”

After several minutes of Rarity messing with my hair, a pegasus mare flew over to us, a clipboard in her hooves.

“Ms. Rarity?” she asked, hovering in front of our group. “Your human is up next. Please move him to the staging area.” Without waiting for an answer, the mare flew off. Rarity ran the comb through my hair one last time before she allowed me to stand.

“Alright, let’s go,” she said, tucking her utensils back into her saddle as I stood up, resisting the urge to shake my head. “And do try and keep yourself presentable until we get there.” I narrowed my eyes, but followed after her nonetheless, Rainbow and Avera flying close behind as we walked through the crowd.

In the center of the warehouse, several fifteen-foot high stands sat in a circular formation, allowing ponies to sit and get a good view of what was happening in the center of the circular clearing. As Rarity led us to a gap in between the stands, I chanced a glance over the sea of ponies, trying to catch a glimpse of the area in the middle of the stands.

I froze, my eyes widening in horror at what I saw. Immediately, my heart rate skyrocketed as the organ tried its best to burst forth from my chest. I was dimly aware that my arms had suddenly began to tremble, and a cold sweat was beginning to trickle down my back.

In the center of the ring of stands, several ponies sat behind a small table, obviously judges. Just in front of them, however, was a large hole that had been boarded up recently. A thick green carpet rested atop the planks of wood, trying in vain to hide the covered hole. It didn’t matter; I knew what was beneath those wooden beams.

I jerked violently as a hoof touched my shoulder. Glancing over, I saw Avera giving me a concerned look.

“You okay, tall stuff?” she asked softly, studying my face. I stared at her for several seconds before replying.

~I’m out~

“What do you mean ‘you’re out’?” she asked as she cocked her head to the side, confused. At her words, Rarity’s head whipped around and she gave me a startled look. Even Rainbow looked surprised.

~I’m out. I’m not doing this~ I signed, slowly beginning to back up. Around us, ponies were giving us curious looks, but none lingered.

“Why are you backing out now?” Avera asked.

~Because, twelve feet underneath those boards out there is where I nearly lost my life during the human pit fight~ I signed, jabbing a finger out at the boarded-up hole. ~I’m not going back out there!~

Avera’s head jerked back, her eyes widening at what I had told her. Her ears folded against her head, and she floated to the ground.

“What’s going on?” Rarity hissed to Avera as she trotted over. “We’re next in line!” As Avera explained what was wrong, I took another step back, not taking my eyes off of the hidden pit. I swallowed thickly as dark memories started to resurface. Why the hell are they holding the human show in the same warehouse as… as that?!

I was snapped back to reality by Rainbow bumping my shoulder with her flank.

“Come on, dude,” she said softly, a warm smile on her face. “It’s different this time. We totally have your back. Nothing bad is going to happen.”

“Certainly, darling. Should anything happen, we’ll have you out of here in a jiffy!” Rarity added, giving me a smile of her own. Beside her, Avera nodded her head.

I glanced back at the hidden pit, unconvinced.

“Tell ya what,” Avera said, hopping into the air again. “You go out there and get examined, and if after that you still aren’t comfortable, we’ll leave, no questions asked. Deal?” I chewed on my bottom lip for a few seconds before sighing heavily, trying to calm my racing heart. Slowly, I nodded my head.

I’m not going to like this, I thought as we moved forward again, heading for the gap in the stands. Rainbow, ever loyal, was walking beside me, her shoulder pressed against my hip as she tried to keep me calm.

When we arrived, a unicorn stallion was waiting for us. Glancing up from his clipboard, he eyed me curiously.

“Ms. Rarity and—” he glanced at the clipboard quickly “—Max?”

“That would be us,” Rarity said, placing a hoof on her chest.

“Once the current human leaves, it’ll be your turn. Wait for the signal, then walk your human to the center of the stage,” the stallion said. As he turned his attention back to the show in progress, Avera looked at me.

“I’m gonna head up into the stands to watch. Rarity and Rainbow will be with you the entire time, and should anything happen, I’ll be there in a flash, okay?” I nodded my head, still eyeing the area in front of me with some trepidation. My instinct was telling me to run, the feeling of death slowly descending upon me. I could almost taste it in the air, but I was pretty sure that was my imagination.

...I hoped it was my imagination.

After a few seconds, the human and pony currently out on stage headed off towards the opposite side of the ring of stands, exiting via another gap on the far side. An assistant by the panel of judges waved to Rarity, indicating that it was our turn. Glancing up at me, she gave me an encouraging smile, which had no effect at calming my nerves. Swallowing thickly, I followed Rarity as she trotted out towards the middle of the makeshift miniature stadium, Rainbow close beside me.

The silence that fell as we headed towards the stage was almost deafening. I felt all eyes upon us, more specifically me, and I swallowed thickly, trying to keep my pace steady. As we stepped out from beside the stands, a gentle murmur of hushed conversation filled the air, ponies clapping softly as Rarity led me towards the table of judges.

As I walked, I tried to keep my eyes straight ahead and ignore the fluttering in my stomach. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw ponies eyeing me curiously, chatting softly with their neighbors. I clenched my teeth, trying to keep my composure. The scene was just too familiar for my liking. All these ponies, sitting around the area… the arena, all staring at me. It was just like… just like…

Above me, the crowd of ponies roared with delight, pounding their hooves on the boxes and crates as they cried out for more blood. Bags of bits exchanged hooves as bets were placed, and deals struck. Pegasi flitted through the air, trying to get a better look at what was happening below. The pained shriek of human suffering filled the air, causing the crowd to roar louder, pumping their hooves into the air.

My right eye twinged with phantom pain as I walked, but I resisted the urge to rub it. Taking a deep breath, I let it out slowly as I kept my pace steady. Beside me, Rainbow glanced up, giving me a concerned look. I ignored her, focusing instead on Rarity’s tail bobbing in front of me, trying to block out everything else.

Same thing, different ponies, different form of entertainment, I mused darkly as I walked. I bet none of them even know what the pit was used for. It seemed like such a shame to me that they were using this area for their human show, considering how many humans must have died here. My mind drifted to the red-haired female, struggling to breathe as my hands tightened around her throat. A shiver ran up my spine.

I was brought out of my funk by something soft and warm brushing my clenched fist. Glancing down, I saw that Rainbow had run her wing over my hand, trying her best to comfort me.

“Come on,” she murmured softly, smiling up at me. “You can do this. We’re here for you.” Struggling to relax my muscles, I slowly unclenched my fist, my knuckles having turned white. Taking another deep breath, I tried desperately to calm my nerves.

Glancing up, I realized that we had finally reached the judges’ table. There were three of them, a mare pegasus, a mare earth pony, and a stallion unicorn.

“Ms. Rarity,” the stallion said, looking over a piece of paper he had placed in front of him. He was an older-looking pony, white streaks running through his brown mane. His coat was a dark green, and his fetlocks were longer than average.

He looked up from the paper, gazing out at us from behind a pair of half-rimmed glasses, his green eyes studying me closely.

“This is your human, Max?” he asked, his voice soft.

“Yes, yes he is,” Rarity replied curtly. Glancing back down at the paper, the unicorn was silent for several seconds before nodding his head.

“Very well. Please strip your human. We need to examine him.” ...Fuck.

Turning, Rarity gave me a quick apologetic look before her horn lit up. A burst of magic later and my clothes disappeared. I was now standing completely naked, except for the collar, in front of a large crowd of ponies.

I thought I explained to them being naked in public makes me uncomfortable, I grumbled as I eyed Rarity in annoyance. She gave me another apologetic look before stepping back. One of the judges, the earth pony, stood and walked out from around the judges’ table.

I eyed her as she approached me. Her coat was a rich, dark orange, while her hooves were painted yellow. Her mane flowed down her shoulders, a mixture of different shades of orange and yellow. An unlit cigarette hung from her mouth.

A hush fell over the warehouse as she began to circle me, eyeing my exposed flesh with brilliant blue eyes. As she paused in front of me, a familiar wolf-whistle rang out, causing her to flinch slightly.

I resisted the urge to groan. God damn it, Avera. Ignoring the interruption, the mare resumed her circling.

After several minutes, the mare stepped back, chewing the butt of her cigarette.

“What do you have, Rosey?” the stallion asked.

“A human male,” she said, and I had to resist really, really hard to not roll my eyes. “Muscular build, somewhat more so than an average human of his apparent age. He’s also a lot taller than an average human, nearly six feet tall if I had to guess.” Slowly, she began to circle me again as she talked, her eyes darting here and there as she studied me with an intensity that made me feel like I was being X-rayed.

“He appears to be in perfect health: muscle structure is good, hair is in good condition. No visible tumors or growths.” I saw Rarity’s eyes light up as the mare talked, but the look of happiness slowly disappeared as she continued to speak.

“He has several scars running vertically down his lower back, as well as some scarring on his left hand and forearm. There is a large scar across his chest; looks like the wound was severe—surprised he survived that injury—as well as a scar across his face. Right eye is milky and useless. Overall, it looks like he’s had a rough ride. We’ll have to mark him down for that.” As she continued to voice her observations, the crowd clung to her words, whispers trickling around the stands.

Moving around to stand in front of me, she removed the cigarette from her mouth and tucked it behind her ear. She then lifted herself up onto her hind legs, propping one of her forelegs on my shoulder. Placing a hoof on my bottom jaw, she gently forced my mouth open, examining my teeth.

Upon seeing my teeth, she jerked her head back, blinking in surprise.

“His teeth don’t look like they are supposed to. He has several normal molars in the back, but also what appears to be incisors and canines in the front. Could possibly be artificial.” Cocking her head to the side, she gave my teeth a curious look before leaning forward and jamming her tongue in my mouth!

I tried to jerk my head back, but the mare’s grip on my neck tightened, keeping my head locked in place. Her hoof kept my lower jaw from snapping shut. I could feel her tongue running over my teeth, and I shivered. It tasted smoky, and I could feel her saliva coating my teeth. I resisted the urge to gag.

As quickly as she started, however, she stopped. Leaning back, she smacked her lips, running her tongue over her own teeth.

“Nope,” she said eventually. “They’re real.” Still keeping herself upright on my shoulders, she turned to look at Rarity.

“Where did you purchase this human?”

“In Canterlot,” Rarity replied without missing a beat. “From a group of traders that found him. He was wandering the desert, if I remember correctly.”

“Curious,” the mare hummed, turning to look back at me. I was busy running my tongue over my teeth, trying to get the weird taste of pony tongue out of my mouth. I doubt very much that that was necessary.

“We’re going to have to mark him down for his teeth,” the mare said as she dropped back down onto all fours. “They aren’t typical for humans, and aren’t considered desirable for standard human breeding.”

“Oh, come on,” I heard Rainbow huff under her breath. She crossed her forelegs, glaring angrily at the judge.

“However,” the mare, Rosey, continued, walking around me again. She poked me with her hoof, being careful not to injure me. In fact, her hoof was surprisingly soft and tender, almost caring. “He’s extremely docile, considering the condition his body’s in. Most humans growl when you try to look in their mouth, or fidget when being examined. He’s stood perfectly still the entire time, and hasn’t made a single noise. I think we can give you extra marks for that.” Smiling at Rarity, she removed the cigarette from behind her ear and returned it to her mouth.

With that, she turned and retreated back to the judges’ table.

“I think that will be it, Ms. Rarity,” the stallion said, looking over at Rarity. “You may escort your human off stage and prepare him for the next event.”

Rarity nodded to the stallion before turning towards me. Her horn lit up and I once again found myself fully clothed. I sighed, smiling internally as we headed towards the exit of the stands. The closer we got to the gap, the better I started to feel.

Stepping through the gap and emerging on the other side of the stands, I sighed heavily, my shoulders sagging in relief. I had managed to get through that ordeal.

“See, that wasn’t so bad, was it?” Avera asked as she approached, hopping off the top of the stands and floating down to us.

“Yeah,” Rainbow said, hovering in front of me. “You did just fine, dude! Although, it was a load of horseapples that they marked you down for your scars. They should have been giving you more points for them. Those scars are awesome!”

~It was actually going pretty well until the judge stuck her tongue in my mouth!~

“She stuck her tongue in your mouth?” Avera squawked, her wings flaring. Beside me, Rarity nodded her head, a bemused look on her face.

“Indeed she did,” she said. “For the life of me I don’t know why, though.”

“Damn,” Avera swore, her ear flicking as a large smile spread across her face. “I knew I was sitting in the wrong section. From where I was, it just looked like she was studying your teeth closely.”

~She was studying them closely. Very closely~ I signed, shivering slightly.

“Well, look on the bright side,” the black pegasus said with a smirk. “You only have two more events left to go through.”

I rolled my eyes at her, snorting loudly. ~Forgive me for not leaping for joy~

The next event was designed to test a human’s temperament and aggressiveness. It was run by the other mare judge, a young pegasus with an extremely light blue coat and purple mane. She would test the human’s submissive behavior. If the human showed any signs of aggression, they would be marked down accordingly. The higher the show of aggression, the higher the marking.

The mare, who was coincidentally named Calm Breeze, seemed quite at peace with what she was doing, even when a human nearly snapped at her during one of her examinations.

When it was my turn to be examined, Avera retreated back into the stands, making sure she got a better seat in case something else interesting happened. Heading back onto the makeshift stage, I felt my stomach tighten slightly, but overall I felt better than when I had first entered the area.

Calm Breeze smiled as we approached, motioning for Rarity to lead me to the center of the stage. As Rarity stepped away, leaving me by myself, I glanced down at the pegasus mare, cocking my head to the side.

“Hello,” she cooed softly, cocking her head to the side as well, a small smile on her face. Lifting a hoof, she pointed it to the floor before saying firmly, “Sit.” Sniffing, I did as she asked and sat down on the green carpet, sitting cross-legged. As I did so, Calm Breeze gave me a confused look, her wings twitching slightly.

“Odd,” she mused out loud. “That’s not how most humans sit.”

“Is that a problem?” Rarity asked nervously, probably hoping that we wouldn’t get marked down for it. I silently agreed. If they marked me down for the way I sat, I was getting up and leaving.

“No,” Calm Breeze answered, her calm smile returning. “It’s just most humans sit with their legs outstretched in front of them. Nothing’s wrong with how he’s sitting, it’s just… unique.”

Studying me for a few more seconds, she then moved forward and slowly put a hoof against my chest. She began applying pressure, trying to push me backwards. I relented immediately and allowed her to push me back until I was lying on the ground, my legs still crossed as I stared up at the warehouse’s ceiling far above me. I remember this view, I thought dryly to myself.

Calm Breeze seemed surprised at the ease with which I had allowed her to push me over.

“He showed no resistance to being pushed onto his back, “ she said to the other judges, eyeing me curiously. “No groaning or growling. Completely submissive. Also, just a bit of observation; he appears to be very flexible, keeping his legs crossed even when laying down. It doesn’t look very comfortable, but he’s doing it anyways. Not sure if it’s because that’s how he’s trained, or because of other reasons.”

Moving over to sit beside me, she slipped her hoof under my shirt, gently rubbing my stomach. Slowly, she worked her way up towards my chest, humming quietly to herself. It actually felt really relaxing, and I found myself fighting to keep my eyes open, my earlier trepidation completely gone.

“He allows his stomach and chest to be touched without showing signs of discomfort despite being exposed,” Calm Breeze said quietly. “If anything, I can feel his muscles relaxing at my touch.” Pulling her hoof from beneath my shirt, she grabbed my arms and carefully pulled me back into a sitting position.

Releasing my arms, she quickly grabbed my right hand with her hooves. She then began to play with it, moving my fingers, causing them to clench and unclench. She would grab the fingers individually and wiggle them around. As she did this, she kept her dark purple eyes locked on my face, searching for signs of aggression or discomfort. It felt weird, but I didn’t really mind. My little cousin used to do this all the time to me back home, especially when I had something in my hands at the time.

One particularly sudden movement with one of my fingers caused my knuckle to crack loudly, echoing around the warehouse. A gasp went up from the crowd and Calm Breeze froze, her eyes widening.

Slowly, I lifted up my other hand, and her body tensed. I clenched my fist several times before using my thumb to crack the knuckles on that hand. With each pop and crack Calm Breeze’s expression grew more and more bewildered.

Blinking, she opened and closed her mouth several times before finally speaking, “He appears to have no problem with his hands being played with, and doesn’t mind having a joint popped, as demonstrated by him doing it himself.”

Releasing my hand, the pegasus stared at me for a bit before moving forward and bopping me on the nose with her hoof.

I scrunched up my face, startled by the sudden act. Reaching forward, she did it again, only this time with more force behind it. This time, I snorted, trying to fight off a sneeze. Her fetlocks were tickling my nose something fierce.

The third time she did it, I reacted. Against my better judgment, I leaned forward with great speed, reaching out and tapping my hand against her muzzle. She jerked back with a squawk, wings flaring. A gasp went up from the crowd again, and I saw one of the attendants nearby tense, ready to spring into action to detain me.

Blinking in confusion, Calm Breeze rubbed her muzzle with a hoof as she stared at me. Removing her hoof from her muzzle, she leaned forward a fourth time to touch my face. As her fetlock brushed my nose, I tried to fight the sensation but couldn’t. Clamping a hand over my mouth, I sneezed loudly. This earned a giggle from the judge, her eyes twinkling with mirth.

“He seems to have no problem with ponies touching his face,” she said, standing up. “And even seems to have a playful nature as well. From what I’ve seen so far, he’d be great to have around foals.”

“You don’t know the half of it,” Rarity said, giving me a large smile. I didn’t know if she was talking about my time with the Crusaders, or with Pumpkin and Pound Cake.

Flitting over to the judges’ table, Calm Breeze grabbed a pair of saddlebags before flying back over. Rummaging around in the bags, she pulled out an apple and handed it to me. I stared at the red fruit in my hand, confused.

Glancing back up at the judge, I saw her just sitting there, watching me.

“Go on,” she said softly. “Eat it.” She mimed eating something and pointed at the apple. Shrugging mentally, I lifted the apple to my mouth to take a bite out of it. However, before I could Calm Breeze reached out and quickly took the apple from my hand. I sat there, staring at my empty hand with a blank look on my face. I should have known…

“Doesn’t respond to having his food taken from him,” Calm Breeze said, rolling the apple around in her hooves as she looked at me. She studied my face for several minutes, chewing on her bottom lip.

“He is extremely docile, almost to a fault. I was not expecting this, considering the scars across his body show past abuse. It almost looks like he went toe-to-toe with a manticore.”

“Actually, I believe it was three,” Rarity corrected. Her eyes immediately widened and she clamped a hoof over her mouth. Calm Breeze stared at her, mouth agape.

“He took on three manticores… and lived?!”

“Well,” Rarity said, scrunching up her face slightly. “He didn’t exactly fight them. More like he ran away from them… while carrying three fillies in his arms.”

“Still, that’s impressive,” Calm Breeze murmured, eyeing me closely. She opened her mouth to say something else, but Rainbow interrupted her.

“He took on a pack of timberwolves by himself and kicked their flanks. I should know, I was there!”

“Well, that settles it, then,” Calm Breeze said, nodding her head. “Given that he’s not only faced manticores and timberwolves, but come out as docile as he is, I’d say we have to give him full marks.” Reaching a hoof back into the saddlebag, Calm Breeze pulled out a flat-looking cookie. She handed it to me before turning back to Rarity.

“That will be all for this test,” she said with a smile. “Congratulations, your human just received the highest score for this part of the show.”

As the judge walked off, I stood up, eyeing the cookie in my hand. Taking a bite, I chewed slowly, rolling the taste around in my mouth. The treat was dry and tasted rather bland, although it had a hint of cinnamon to it.

The things I do for my friends, I mused, continuing to eat the cookie as we walked off the stage.

The last test was simple. The unicorn stallion would test the human’s ability to understand and follow simple orders. Due to my high score last round, I was scheduled to go last. That meant that Rarity, Rainbow, Avera, and I were basically sitting around doing nothing for a good forty-five minutes.

As it neared the time when I was supposed to go ‘perform’, Rainbow suddenly flew off. She returned several minutes later, an uneasy look on her face.

“Okay, I just went to check,” she said in a hushed voice. “Winter Cold and her human have already gone. In order to beat Brutus, you need to get a perfect score!” She shifted on her hooves nervously, her wings twitching by her side.

“What’s wrong?” Avera asked, smirking. “I thought you said we had this in the bag.”

“Don’t worry, darling,” Rarity added, placing a hoof on Rainbow’s shoulder. “I’m sure that Max will do fine.” When she looked at me, I gave her a small smile and a wink.

“I guess,” Rainbow said, returning the smile. She then perked up, her confident demeanor returning. “Yeah, yeah! We can totally do this!”

Just then, the same pegasus mare from before fluttered over, eyeing her clipboard.

“Ms. Rarity, your human is up next,” she said. “Please get ready.” As she flew off, I stood up and cracked my back, sighing happily.

“Just one more to go and then you’re done,” Avera said as she stretched. “Then we can go back to the library.”

As Rarity, Rainbow, and I headed towards the the gap in the stands, Avera flew off to find a seat. We were called out the minute we arrived, and I was soon standing on the stage for the third time that day, Rarity and Rainbow off to the side. The stallion stood in front of me, eyeing me over his glasses.

The minute I was in place, we began. The commands were fairly standard: come, stay, sit, lay down, shake, play dead (that was my personal favorite, although the irony of it wasn’t lost upon me), and speak (and the irony continued to grow). He had me walk beside him as he circled around the edges of the stands, halting and heeling whenever he asked.

I followed his commands instantly and without hesitation. After several laps around the circular stage area, he started to try and trip me up by giving several commands in rapid succession. I wasn’t sure if he was impressed that I was following his orders perfectly, or getting frustrated.

I really blew everyone’s minds when, as a last ditch effort to get me to screw up, he rambled off a list of around ten commands, one right after the other. I think he was hoping that I wouldn’t know which command to follow.

I did every single command perfectly, in order, without pause, ending up looking at the judge upside down from a handstand.

As the crowd and the judge picked their jaws up off of the floor, I saw Rarity and Rainbow hoofbump out of the corner of my eye.

“W-well, Ms. Rarity,” the stallion said when he finally found his voice again. “I must say, I was not expecting this. Your human is able to follow commands so well, he’s almost pony-like. I do believe I have no choice but to give him full marks for this.” Instantly, Rainbow was airborne, whooping in joy as she did flips through the air.

“Aw yeah!” she cheered, pumping a hoof. As the crowd began to cheer—clapping lightly as to not spook the humans—a smug smile spread across Rarity’s face.

“If you would take your human off stage, we will be announcing the winners shortly,” the judge said, inclining his head.

As we exited, Avera flew down, a large smile across her muzzle.

“I think that went fairly well,” she said as she hovered down beside me.

“Fairly well?” Rainbow said, her whole body trembling. “He got full marks! That means unless something comes up, we just got first place!” Squealing happily, she flipped through the air.

Turning to look at me, Avera smirked. “See, it wasn’t that bad, right?”

~Speak for yourself. That was the most awkward thing I’ve done lately~ I replied, glaring over at her in mock annoyance.

“Aw,” she cooed, “does somepony want a treat for being a good boy?” As she spoke, she held up another one of those stale cinnamon cookie treats, waving it front of my face. I growled at her, before snatching the cookie from her grasp.

Placing it in my mouth, I glared at her as she continued to laugh at me.

~I’m going to eat this, but I am highly offended by it~ As I chewed on the stale treat, the sound of a bell ringing out echoed around the warehouse. The crowd grew quiet as a voice, magnified by magic, spoke up.

“The judges have made their final decision. All contestants, please report to the stage for the award announcements.” As the echoes died down, Rarity blinked in surprise.

“Well, that was certainly quick,” she said.

“What did you expect? Max was the last one to go. It’s not like they're going to take that long to figure out the winners,” Avera chuckled as we started to make our way back towards the stage. This time, Avera remained with us as we emerged into the staging area.

All the participants were standing in a row in front of the judges’ table, ponies standing beside their humans, a hopeful expression on the owners’ faces. I could see Winter Cold standing at the far end of the line, a smug smile on her face. As my eyes drifted to her human, I winced. I didn’t think someone could get uglier over time.

We took our spot on the end of the line, Rainbow quivering excitedly as we waited. After several minutes, the three judges walked out on stage and took their seats behind the table. The crowd fell silent as the three ponies held one last hushed conversation before turning their attention to the line of participates in front of them.

Calm Breeze was eyeing the line of humans, a small smile on her face. The unicorn stallion was eyeing the crowd, a bored expression on his face.

Rosey, the earth pony, stood up and cleared her throat, drawing everyone’s attention. When she spoke, her voice carried around the stands, clear and loud.

“After much consideration and discussion, we have come to an agreement. The winners are as follows: in fourth place, is Willow Wisp with her human, Crystal.” As the crowd applauded respectfully, a brown earth pony with dark green mane stepped forward to receive her ribbon, a shy smile on her face. She moved back to stand next to her human, a young female with short blond hair.

“In third place, is Emerald Dawn with her human, June.” A dark green unicorn stepped forward, blowing her multi-hued orange mane out of her face as she approached the judges. Once she received her prize, she took her placed beside her human again. Again, the crowd applauded.

“In second place, is Winter Cold with her human, Brutus.” Winter blinked in surprise, her brow furrowing before she composed herself. Smiling sweetly, the unicorn stepped forward to receive her prize. Turning back to rejoin her human, her eyes landed on me. They widened slightly before her forced smile turned into a triumphant smirk. I felt a small chill run through my body.

As Winter returned to her human’s side, Rainbow was practically bouncing in place, a large grin on her face. For a moment, it looked like someone had painted Pinkie and given her some wings.

“And finally,” Rosey said, glancing over the row of humans, “in first place, we have Rarity with her human, Max.” I immediately moved my foot to stomp down on Rainbow’s tail, stopping her from leaping into the air and cheering. Avera snickered loudly as Rainbow began dancing in place, bobbing her head up and down.

With a smile on her face, Rarity stepped forward, the crowd cheering her on, to receive her prize.

“Well done,” Rosey said. As she shook Rarity’s hoof with her own, the other humans and their owners began to disperse, and the crowd slowly began to trickle from the stands. “As the first place champion, you not only win the twelve-thousand bit prize, but your human also earns certain breeding rights, and will be allowed to enter any human show in the near future, regardless of class or breeding.”

I winced slightly when she started talking about selective breeding. Beside me, Avera just snickered louder.

“Thank you, darling,” Rarity said as she accepted the large bag filled with bits.

“You certainly have a fine human here, Ms. Rarity,” Rosey said with a smile. “Congratulations on winning first place.”

“Yes, well, that’s all fine and dandy, but there is a slight problem with that,” a voice spoke up from behind me, causing me to jump slightly. Turning, I grimaced slightly when I saw Winter Cold standing there, minus her human, with a large smirk on her face.

“And what problem is that, darling?” Rarity asked, eyeing Winter curiously.

“The fact that that is not your human,” Winter said smugly, pointing a hoof at me. Rosey’s eyes widened.

“What?” She turned to look at Rarity and Rainbow, both of whom had guilty looks on their faces. “This human isn’t yours?”

“No,” Winter answered for them. “He’s not. He belongs to Princess Sparkle, and I’m pretty sure that neither of you are her.” Rosey gave Rarity an affronted look, her eyes blazing.

“Care to explain this?” Both Rarity and Rainbow remained silent, too shocked at this sudden turn of events to formulate a proper response. Winter’s smug look continued to grow. Someone’s made their way onto my shitlist, I thought, glaring at the noble mare with contempt.

“I’m sorry,” Rosey snorted after neither mare answered her. “But if that is the case then your human is disqualified, and I’ll have to report this to the authorities.” A look of horror flew across Rarity’s face, and Rainbow looked like she had just been kicked in the gut.

Avera just laughed and shook her head.

“Do you really expect Princess Sparkle to come out to an event like this?” she asked, causing both Rosey and Winter to look at her.

“I’m sorry,” Winter sniffed, looking down at Avera with disdain. “Who are you?”

“First Lieutenant Avera Noctus,” she replied, before waving a hoof at me, her smile growing. “His handler.”

“H-handler?” Winter choked, her eyes widening. Avera ignored her and turned to look at Rosey.

“Princess Sparkle was very busy today, but wanted to enter her human in the show. Something about letting him get out and have some fun. She didn’t want to win by default from ponies withdrawing, so she asked Ms. Rarity to enter him in her name instead, and not Princess Sparkle’s.”

Rosey blinked in surprise, tilting her head to the side.

“That… actually makes sense,” she muttered thoughtfully.

“But, if you’re the handler, then why is this… mare the one who entered him?” Winter asked, trying to salvage the situation. I placed my hand over my mouth to hide my smirk. It’s like watching a drowning rat.

“Ms. Rarity is Max’s groomer, thus he is more comfortable around her. I’m just here to make sure nopony gets any ideas about the princess’s human,” Avera said with a flick of her ear.

“Well, what about her?” Winter asked frantically, pointing at Rainbow, who just growled at the noble.

“She’s his physical trainer. Keeps him fit and healthy,” Avera replied, her tone bored. “Look, if you’re going to complain about coming in second place, you can do it elsewhere.”

“B-but—”

“I have a scroll here, given to me by Princess Sparkle, that states that Ms. Rarity has permission to enter the princess’s human in this human show,” Avera interrupted, pulling a rolled-up scroll out of the pouch around her thigh. Holding it out to Rosey, she quirked an eyebrow. “Do you need to see it?”

“That will be quite alright,” Rosey said, waving the scroll away. “If you are his handler, and the princess has indeed given permission, then it is allowed.” She gave a sheepish smile to Rarity, who was looking relieved. “Sorry, it’s just we have had ponies steal humans before just to enter them for the prize money.”

“Well, I can assure you, darling, that was not our intention,” Rarity lied with a smile. I bit my tongue to stop myself from laughing. That’s exactly what you did though!

Rosey apologized again before trotting off, leaving us standing there, Winter glared at our group in disgust.

Rainbow crossed her forelegs, looking smug. “What’s wrong, Winter? Upset that your human wasn’t as good as ours? It’s okay, he is pretty awesome.”

“This changes nothing, featherbag,” Winter hissed, her eyes narrowing. Rainbow and Avera both squawked at the name, the latter nearly falling out of the air. “Just because your scarred-up freak beat my purebred this time doesn’t prove anything,” Winter added. She then turned to glare at me, but froze, her eyes widening in horror.

Now, I’ve been in Equestria for over half a year. I’ve lived here long enough to figure out some insults from the local populace (mostly directed at me as some elderly stallion yelled at me to get off of his lawn when I was running away from Rainbow). To call a pegasus a ‘featherbag’ was similar to calling a black person a nig— well, let’s just say it’s something you’re not supposed to say.

So, when Winter called Rainbow a ‘featherbag’, I decided that it was time for her to leave.

When she had been talking, I had crouched down and leaned in as close as I could get without her noticing, tilting my head so that my bad eye was forward. When she finally turned to look at me, I gave her the biggest, tooth-filled, demonic smile I could muster, all while growling deep in my chest.

There was a brief second of silence before the scent of urine filled the area, and then Winter was off across the stage like a bullet. I straightened up, watching her go, before turning and looking at my friends. Rarity gave me a terrified look, and Avera’s smile was no longer present as she eyed me nervously. Rainbow had a look of awe on her face.

“Dude, you just made her wet herself,” she breathed. “That… was… awesome!” Pulling out my notebook, I quickly scratched out a message before tearing the page out and handing it to Dash.

+Nobody insults my friends in front of me+

With that, I turned and walked off, intent on finding my way out of the warehouse that had nearly been my grave.

As we headed back towards town, away from the warehouse, Rainbow was beside herself. She was flitting to and fro, babbling happily as she clutched the blue ribbon to her chest. I couldn’t help the small smile that touched my face as I watched her. Despite the fact I had done all the work, I allowed her to keep the ribbon.

After all, forty-eight hundred bits was good enough for me. That, combined with the money I earned on Nightmare Night, gave me a considerable pile of bits. Besides, although I would never actually admit it to them, I did have some fun today.

Avera walked beside me, using her wings to brush the tops of the snow piles we passed. Rarity was in the rear, staring at the snow-covered ground with a distracted look on her face as she walked.

“Hey, Avera?” Rainbow asked suddenly, flitting down to hover beside me.

“Yeah?”

“How did you get Twilight’s permission down on paper? She didn’t even know we were doing this.” Avera furrowed her brow, confused. Suddenly, she perked up and smirked at Dash.

“Oh, you mean that scroll I pulled out?”

“Yeah, that!”

“I didn’t get Twilight’s permission,” Avera laughed. “Twilight doesn’t even know we’ve left the library.” Both Rainbow and I looked at her in confusion.

“But, you have the scroll!”

“It’s blank,” Avera explained as she pulled out the scroll and unrolled it, showing that there was nothing written on it. “I was bluffing.”

~And if they had looked at the scroll?~ I asked, raising my eyebrows. Avera just shrugged, looking unconcerned.

“Then we’d have been in trouble and had to beat a hasty retreat.”

~That’s awfully risky~

“There’s no gain without some risk,” Avera said with a shrug.

“Well, thank Celestia that it worked!” Rainbow laughed, hugging the ribbon closer to her chest.

As we reached the marketplace, I had to pause in order to not be taken out by a strange sight: a small, grayish-violet unicorn filly with a red scarf, and a human, with reddish-brown hair and beard, dressed in a black hoodie, zipped by on a sled propelled by the unicorn’s magic.

As I watched them zoom off across the market, somebody cleared their throat behind me. Turning, I saw Rarity giving me a thoughtful look.

“Darling, if you don’t mind, there’s something that’s been bugging me that I simply must ask you,” she said. I nodded to her, giving her a small smile as I reached into my bag for my notebook. Nearby, Avera perked up and Rainbow hovered closer, both with curious expressions on their faces.

“When you were showing us your device, the… the phone, was it?” I nodded my head, and she continued. “Well, when you were showing us those moving pictures of your world, I couldn’t help but notice that there were only humans in them. Are there no ponies on your world?”

I froze, the smile vanishing from my face as my body tensed. I hadn’t told Twilight anything about ponies from Earth. I was hoping to avoid the subject, honestly. Unfortunately, Rarity seemed to have blown that plan clean out of the water.

“Darling?” I blinked, realizing that I had been staring off into the distance. Looking down, I saw Rarity giving me a concerned look. Slowly flipping my notebook open, I sat down on a nearby bench that had been cleared of snow, and began to write.

+Yes, we have ponies back home+

“Then why didn’t we see any?” Rarity asked, cocking her head to the side. “Even in that picture of the big city, there weren’t any ponies. Do they live in a different part of the world?”

I chewed on the inside of my cheek, tapping the charcoal against the paper. Sighing, I ran my hand through my hair before replying. +Do you remember how shocked you were when you discovered that I was intelligent?+

Rarity nodded her head, pulling her scarf a little tighter around her neck as the wind picked up.

“Yes,” she said. “I could hardly believe my eyes. I was sure that I was dreaming and would wake up to find it had never happened. It just didn’t make sense to me, even after Twilight explained that you were from a different world. Naturally, though, I managed to work my mind around it, and well… here we are.” She smiled up at me for several seconds before she blinked and a confused look crossed her face.

“Why?”

+Let’s just say I felt the same way about you ponies+

“Huh? What do you mean by that?” Rainbow asked, reading over Rarity’s shoulder, who looked just as confused. Avera was silent for brief moment before she inhaled sharply, her head jerking back. Her blue eyes widened as she looked up at me.

“Are you telling us,” she asked slowly, “that on your planet… ponies are like the humans here? We’re nothing but animals?” Rarity and Rainbow’s heads whipped up and they stared at me, mouths agape.

Slowly, I nodded my head.

Avera’s ear folded against her head, and she gave me a blank look. Rarity looked slightly ill, but she maintained her composure, patting at her mane absentmindedly with a hoof in a calming gesture. Rainbow continued to stare at me, her mouth agape. Slowly, her wings began to spread by her sides.

“That must have been a major shock for you, to find the roles reversed,” Avera said eventually, her tone oddly casual. I chuckled, shaking my head.

+It’s actually, oddly, very funny sometimes+

“How so?” the black pegasus asked, her ears returning to their normal position. Rarity was calming down as well, though she now looked rather troubled. Rainbow just continued to stare into the distance, her face turning red due to the cold.

+You know those saddles you make to look good, and be fashionable?+ I asked, looking at Rarity. When she nodded, my smile grew. +Back home, we used saddles as a means to allow horses and ponies to carry us more comfortably+

“You use saddles to turn ponies into beasts of burden?” Rarity asked, her eyes widening again.

“Like, as a show of dominance?” Avera asked, scrunching up her face. Beside her, Rainbow squeaked, her wings spreading wider.

+No, as a means for comfort, and to allow us to steer them. Ponies on Earth are as stupid as humans on Equus+

“Interesting,” Avera said, a grin slowly spreading across her face. “I think the princesses would like to know this little tidbit.” I swallowed nervously, my right eye twitching slightly. Avera picked up on my distress and shook her head.

“Don’t worry,” she said. “If anything, it could possibly help you in the long run. If you can treat us ponies as equals, despite what we are like on your old world, then who’s to say ponies here can’t do the same for you?”

“Darling,” Rarity said suddenly, worry etched into expression. “Have you ever told Twilight this?” I blinked in surprise and shook my head. She frowned, her troubled look growing. “I see.” She fell silent, rubbing her chin with a hoof. Slowly, she looked over at Rainbow. I glanced over at her as well, only to find that she was still staring off into space.

“Come on,” Avera said, snapping us back to the present. “We’ve got to get back to the library before Twilight finds out.”

“Before Twilight finds out what?” a voice spoke up. Rarity yelped, Avera and Rainbow leapt into the air in shock, and I jumped, standing up from the bench so fast, I became lightheaded.

Twilight was standing there, scarf wrapped around her neck, saddlebags on her back. She gave us a bemused look, her eyes traveling to each of us in turn. Ebony peeked her head out from behind the alicorn, a blank look on her face.

Silence fell as each group stared at the other, neither saying anything. Then, Twilight’s eyes landed on the ribbon in Rainbow’s hooves.

“What’s that?” she asked, giving it a confused look.

“It’s, uh… it’s a ribbon for… for f-flying. Yeah, a flying ribbon I won in Cloudsdale!” Rainbow gave her a sheepish smile.

I silently prayed that Twilight would buy that lie. I did not want to sit through three hours of her telling me why what I did was wrong, and cheating, and I should never have done it in the first place, followed by writing a friendship report to Celestia.

“Really?” Twilight asked.

“Yeah,” Rainbow said, nodding her head quickly.

“Then why is there a human on it, and ‘Ponyville Human Show’ across the base?” Damn… so close, but no cigar.

“I...uh,” Rainbow began. She fidgeted her hooves, eyes darting back and forth nervously. She took a deep breath…

...and then bolted like a rabbit, a rainbow streak trailing behind her as she sped off into the sky. The sound of thundering hooves told me that Rarity was making a break for it as well, leaving me and Avera to fend for ourselves.

We both glanced at each other before turning to look at Twilight. She was tapping her hoof, giving us both an annoyed look.

“It was his idea!” Avera cried suddenly, pointing a hoof at me. With that, she turned and shot off towards the library in a black blur of fur and feathers. Twilight watched her go before slowly turning her head back to me.

I gave Twilight a large smile, chuckling nervously. Her eyes narrowed. As she opened her mouth to say something, I made my decision.

I’m proud to say that I managed to make it a couple of meters before a lavender aura wrapped around me, lifting me off my feet and carrying me back towards my doom.