As nice as Trace and Twilight were, it was good to walk through Ponyville with Rarity. Her presence had less of a sense of being escorted, and more a friendly walk. Probably just my nerves, but any sense of comfort was welcome in a new world.

Sadly it seemed Roseluck had already packed up her flowers and gone home for the evening. A pity. I'd wanted to see her again. Still, there was always tomorrow.

And since my brain hates me, it decided then to point out that I'd given Alex books that detailed all sorts of horrible things I was potentially capable of. If it were me, I'd round up Matt and Trace and go for round two of the interrogation game. I was ready to start checking around every corner for an ambush before I reined in my paranoia.

But not before Rarity noticed.

"Is something the matter, dear?" She asked, stopping beside me.

"Just concerned about what will happen to me. That other shape of mine could have a lot of dangerous abilities. I gave Mr. Roberts a set of books that detail those abilities. I'm just half afraid he might decide it's too dangerous for me to stay here," I admitted, feeling a bit sheepish.

I would have sent me away. I may not be as powerful as a Solar Exalted but the thought of what harm I could do to these ponies chilled my blood. They were so open and trusting. My Solar NPC would have caused all kinds of havoc. But I could still do terrible things. I didn't even know what charms I had.

"You don't need to worry about Alex. He is a rare breed, a true knight. He would judge your actions, not just what you could do." Rarity gave me a reassuring look, and I felt myself calming. "And as wonderful as he is, he is not the final authority on who is allowed to stay in Ponyville."

I'd already decided I would trust Alex to decide for me, but I could see Rarity would likely not want to talk about the possibility that I might have to leave town just after arriving.

I decided it was time for a subject change, "Rarity, do you know anything about human undergarments?" Brain, why do you hate me? Couldn't you come up with any other topic?

"Not much I'm afraid, darling. Not much call for them." She told me as we started walking again.

"I um... I'll be needing a bra." Or I could poke somepony's eye out. The cool evening air and the fabric rubbing across them had caused my nipples to make their presence known.

"A bra?" Rarity asked.

"It's a garment to support and cover my..." I indicated my bosom. "Keep things like my, uh headlights from showing."

"Headlights, darling?" Rarity turned to get a better look at me. I felt myself blushing yet again at her examination of my chest. "I see... I have some ideas for that, but if you have any pictures of what they should look like, it would be helpful."

”I'll show you some examples when I've got my tablet back." I said as we walked past a side street where I noticed a slightly seedy looking bar with a sign proclaiming it to be the Grain Bucket. What caught my attention though was the mare walking from the bar towards us.

Actually, it wasn't so much walking, or maybe weaving, as stumbling. It was clear she'd had quite a bit to drink. Rarity's ears flicked back and she gave the mare a pitying look. As for me, I instantly recognized that electric blue mane as belonging to my first pony friend and I wondered why Blitzen was in this inebriated state.

She paused for a moment when she saw us, her eyes taking a moment to focus. She looked right at me. "I jusht wanted to get good an shalted every night. Then you showed up and I had to do shomething... and you're sho pretty. Why do you make me feel like thish?" Blitzen slurred as she staggered toward me.

I did not expect what happened next. Blitzen got up onto her hind legs, a feat which surprised me given her unsteady condition. She walked the two steps needed to bring herself to stand just in front of me. She stood there for a second before her balance failed and she fell against me hitting my chest face first. Instinctively, I put my arms around her to hold her up. And then she straightened up and kissed me...

I'm not sure I can describe that kiss... It was clumsy, awkward, and messy. Her mouth covered most of my face until I pushed her head back from mine. For some reason, I paused when it was just our lips touching... there was something... nice about the feeling of her lips against mine. She tasted of salt and alcohol. When I noticed that, I realized I was kissing her back. I was so stunned, I stumbled and fell on my backside, leaving Blitzen unsupported.

She dropped down back to her normal quadrupedal stance and we locked eyes. It felt like I was falling into her eyes for a moment. Then she wavered and fell forward. Somehow, her face ended up in my chest again. She let out a snort and her tongue lolled out onto my dress depositing yet more booze scented drool on the already mistreated fabric.

"You make me feel like I'm flying..." Her voice trailed off as her eyes closed and she started snoring.

Rational Thought

Rational Thought has encountered an unexpected error and was closed. Most likely causes for this are: You kissed a pony.
* Press any key to restart Rational Thought.
* Wait for Rarity to tap you to see if you’re alright to automatically reboot system.
You will lose any unsaved information in all applications.

Press any key to continue_

Restarting...
You did not shut the system down properly. Scanning memory for errors...
0 errors found.
You totally kissed a pony.

I recovered my wits to find Rarity giving me a look split between worry and disgust. I was afraid she was upset with me for what just happened, but she quickly dispelled that fear.

"Just look at the mess that's been made of your dress. Your first new clothing here and it's already covered in dirt and drool." She gave the snoring Blitzen a withering glare. "And you, just mauled by that mare." Her horn lit up as she began cleaning off my dress with magic. "Do you even know her, or was she so out of it on salt that she tried to kiss a complete stranger?"

“Blitzen’s a friend, she’s the one who found me when I arrived,” I told her. Then a thought hit me, "Wait a sec, salt? What's with the salt? I thought she was drunk."

"Salt affects us like alcohol would affect you, darling. Your friend Blitzen has had quite a bit, it would seem."

I moved my legs out from under Blitzen and stood up, straightening my dress.

"Rarity, I uh...” I was kissing Blitzen, and I really don't know what I'm feeling right now... "I'm sorry about getting the dress you made for me dirty so soon after you gave it to me."

"Not to worry darling. There will be human style gowns at the hospital and I can have your dress cleaned and ready for you in the morning."

"Thinking of the hospital, I'm taking Blitzen with us. I don't want to leave her on her own." I knelt down to lift the sleeping pony. I lifted her easily, surprised at how little she weighed compared to her size. "She's really light, lighter than I was expecting."

"Well of course, she's a Pegasus. It's part of their magic," Rarity told me.

I stumbled and almost dropped Blitzen. "A Pegasus? But?” Where are her wings? I almost added.

Suddenly a number of things made sense. The ridges on her back, the way she reacted to my offhand mention of a flight ring, and the way Rainbow dash seemed disturbed by her.

"It's a sad story, dear. And not mine to tell." Her usual over the top drama was completely gone, replaced by a quiet sadness. "Both the accident and what happened after..."

We were silent for a little while after that. Then Rarity spoke up.

"Bit for your thoughts, dear."

"Just thinking about Blitzen. Trying to imagine what it must have been like for her. To be born to fly and to lose that."

"Yes, terrible thing. Other than Fluttershy, most pegasi seem to barely be able to touch the ground. They fly almost everywhere."

"And here I've been feeling bent out shape over being upgraded by Autochthon against my will. At least I haven't really lost anything. I can't imagine how Blitzen could even come back to Ponyville if this is where she lost her wings... And she came here for me." I felt more than a little ashamed that I hadn't noticed what Blitzen was going through to come here.

We came to the hospital. It seemed I was expected, as a pink maned white pony with a nurses cap came to the door when we approached.

"You must be Miss Eleanor Asher. I'm Nurse Redheart," she said, smiling at me. "Doctor Emerald told me you'd be coming, though he didn't mention you'd be bringing somepony else," She sniffed, her voice full of annoyance. "Is there a reason you're carrying her?"

"Ah, she has become one with her inner self," I replied.

"She passed out." Rarity said, while giving me a look like she thought I'd lost my mind.

"That too." I told the nurse.

Redheart was glaring at the Pegasus in my arms. "She should be taken to her place to sleep it off, then we can see about getting you checked in."

"She doesn't have a place to stay in Ponyville that I know of. She lives in Fillydelphia usually." I explained.

"We don't normally provide a bed to any salted pony that comes along. However if that's what it takes to get you signed in, then we'll do what we can." Redheart said with another glare at Blitzen. "Now follow me Miss Eleanor Asher. Miss Rarity, I think Doctor Emerald is in the east wing."

Rarity perked up and went off to find the doctor. I went down the other hallway with the nurse. Though the hall was fairly wide, she made sure to walk close to me and I felt her tail brushing against my leg a few times as we walked. And once I swear she brushed it up over my rear like she was trying to cop a feel with her tail.

I walked with Redheart down the hall to the room she had in mind. Inside were two empty beds. I set Blitzen down in the nearest bed. I turned and saw Redheart holding a hospital gown in her mouth, which I took from her with a forced smile. I hoped my disgust for the things wasn't as obvious as it felt.

"I'll get out so you can change," she said, stepping out of the room. She closed the door most of the way.

I slid my new dress off, and picked up the hospital gown. It was definitely made for humans and, like every hospital gown in every world I've had to wear one, it covered up barely enough to preserve modesty while doing nothing to preserve dignity. For a moment I'd swear I saw Redheart peeking as I changed, but when I turned the door was still mostly closed.

"You can come in now," I said.

Redheart trotted in, "Now miss, sit on the bed and take off the gown so I can examine you."

I sat on the bed but the gown stayed on, "Shouldn't the doctor be the one examining me?"

"Right. But I want to take your temperature, blood pressure, things like that."

"I don't need the gown off for that," I protested.

"But that's no fun," she said with a sly smile. "You don't need to worry, I'll be sure to take real good care of you... Ooh, listen to me, I don't usually flirt with patients. But you're not really a patient are you. Doctor Emerald just thinks you need some observation for your first night in a new world... And I'd like to observe you really close tonight. If you know what I mean."

At this point I couldn't even pretend to be oblivious. "Y-you want to what? Why? We aren't even the same species." Yeah, because that stopped me with the vampire, the demoness, the elf, or any of the others I'd been with over the years.

"That's part of the fun. You can't tell me you aren't thinking about it. Ooh, you are so cute when you blush!" She said with a giggle and a blush of her own.

I tried to formulate a response to that, and to figure out what I wanted to have happen next.

"Just a moment, gonna get some things." Redheart said as she turned to one of the cabinets and pulled open a drawer.

As Nurse Redheart searched the drawer, her backside was facing me. Her tail was raised and she was wiggling her rear in a way I was finding oddly hard to look away from. She looked back to see me staring and she smiled with a hungry gleam in her eye.

I was actually imagining Redheart kissing me... and more, when the fates decided it was time to pay attention to my life again and start kicking me around some more. Which is to say, our moment was interrupted by the metaphorical cold shower of an angry Doctor Emerald. At which point my brain woke up and reminded me that I was still dealing with internal questions from when Blitzen kissed me, and perhaps now was truly not the time to try anything more intimate.

"Eleanor! In the last few moments you've been adjusting your position and vocal pitch in ways that seem calculated to elicit a reaction from nurse Redheart. What you do on your own time is your business but please stop flirting with the nurse while she is supposed to be attending to her duties." Emerald said in what was likely a lot quieter tone than I heard in my head.

"I... Wait? What?!" Me flirting?! She was flirting with me!

"You mean you weren't aware of what you were doing? Interesting." Emerald commented as he walked over.

An ugly thought rose in my mind and in a nanosecond my brain confirmed my fears. My hands clenched into fists and I felt a growl starting in my throat, "That goddamned brass plated mechanical bastard!"

There was the sound of shredding fabric and a blue light filled the room. The bed creaked under the sudden change of weight as I took on my mechanical form. I stood up and prepared to howl my fury to the heavens when Emerald interrupted me.

"Please calm yourself Miss Asher." Emerald said in a soothing tone.

I noticed then that the ponies in the room were terrified of me. Well mostly. Blitzen was still passed out, and Redheart seemed to be looking at me in a way I wasn't entirely comfortable with.

"Goddamn it... A Thousandfold Courtesan Calculations charm... It's been running in the back of my mind since earlier today. It... makes me a nearly perfect seductress. I didn't even know I was doing it." Every word of the confession burned with humiliation.

I couldn't take this. I leaned against the wall and started to cry. Then because the humiliation conga wasn't done for the night we all got a wonderful demonstration of Newton's third law of motion.

There was a whistle of steam from my mechanical arm and I went flying across the room. Apparently I had a Piston Driven Megaton Hammer charm. And when my hand was flat against a solid surface, the whole equal and opposite reaction involved flinging me across the room.

I also got to find out what the pin I took out earlier was for, as my left forearm detached from the rest of my arm somewhere along the way.

I smashed into the opposite wall, putting a fair sized hole in the defenseless wall. After a moment or ten of seeing stars I tried to sit up.

"Try to be careful there ma'am." Alex said.

Sitting up, I see I've acquired an audience. Rarity was standing by Emerald, and Alex was holding out a hand to help me stand up. Rainbow Dash was hovering nearby.

I accepted the help and got to my feet as Rainbow took a closer look at the hole in the wall.

"I think that's the same wall the Cutie Mark Crusaders put a hole in when they were trying to get nurse cutie marks. They did way more damage though." Dash said as she looked back to me.

”I just put a human shaped hole in the wall, what could the children do that was worse?! Wait, don't answer that. I don't think I wanna know." Speculating on how bad it might have been did at least slow my tears for the moment.

Alex chuckled, "Scoots has cost me many a bit in repair bills. Still, keeps her in fresh air."

I looked at him incomprehensibly.

Dash answered, "Yeah. That awesome little whirlwind of destruction is our daughter." She must have seen the growing confusion on my face. "Adopted, but all ours."

Ok, so their daughter evidently has a talent for destruction that outweighs a semidivine entity with poor power control... Scary.

"Anybody see where my arm landed?" I started looking for the wayward limb.

"I think this is it over here," Alex said. "Is it safe to pick up?"

I nodded and he brought it over to me.

"Beautiful workmanship." He paused for a moment. "Aw geez, didn't mean that to sound flirty." He paused again considering something. "Felt something weird for a moment there but it stopped almost as soon as it started. Like it was testing if it could affect me. One of your Charms perhaps? Involuntary maybe?"

"Broken is more like it. I'm trying to figure out how to remove it, but once I'm in one piece I can shut it off." I said taking the arm and reattaching it. My elbow felt a little sore, but otherwise it was fine. I took a second to isolate the Courtesan Calculations charm and shut it down, hard.

"Wonder why it didn't affect me more than that? Stuff to think about later. For now you should rest up. I'll send somepony to take care of the damage. You have enough on your plate right now, Eleanor." Alex said.

"Huh, you didn't call me ma'am," I noted.

Alex rubbed the back of his neck, "Sorry about that. I hope I'm not stepping over any bounds."

"Only if you called me ma'am again." I replied.

I decided I had put off the inevitable long enough and stepped over to Nurse Redheart. Her blue eyes were filled with uncertainty as I approached.

"Nurse, I want to apologize. Not just for the damage. I was... I was using one of my magic abilities to flirt with you earlier. I didn't realize I was doing it but I should have." I told her.

"It's okay Eleanor Asher. I think I would have found you interesting regardless. It just made me forget that I should check with somepony else before acting on impulses like that." She replied.

"Oh gods... You have a boyfriend. I am so sorry..." I started, feeling shame building up again.

I seriously gave thought to running off to be a hermit in the woods. I'd picked up some survival skills and that way I wouldn't have to mess up anybody's life but my own. If I weren't so tired after all the excitement today, I might have done it.

"Nothing happened, Eleanor. Don't worry about it." Redheart told me with a gentle smile.

"Thank you for seeing it that way." I said.

Then I turned to Rarity and Emerald.

"I've got the same apology to make to you. I'm fairly sure the charm was acting on Rarity right up till I found out she was in a relationship. Evidently my subconscious has some scruples at least. But still I am sorry for what I did." I told them.

"You have control of this charm now?" Emerald asked.

"Yes, and I promise I will keep it locked down till I figure out how to remove it. I know there's a way, I'm just not sure how." I said.

"Please do," Rarity said with a sniff. I gathered she wasn't quite ready to be forgiving, for which I could hardly blame her.

Feeling pretty low after all of this, I got into the empty bed.

"So, let me sum up my day so far. Wake up in chains like a goddamn criminal." I started.

"I'm sorry." Alex said.

"Get interrogated and threatened!" I continued.

"Really sorry," Alex added.

"Things start looking up and then I find out I've been running a subroutine that was trying to seduce every mare I met," I went on.

"No idea how sorry I am," Alex said.

"That one's not your fault," Dash commented.

"I know," Alex replied.

I got what he was trying to do, but it had been a long day, and I was too upset to keep trying to deal with things.

"And now I've put a hole in the wall. I'm tired, sore, angry, embarrassed, and frustrated as hell. So, I'm sorry, hook up the monitor and let me go to sleep. I just can't handle any more today." I finished laying down, letting the doctor apply the contacts for the EEG. I just didn't have it in me right then to deal with any more today.

One day in and I was well on my way to making a complete mess of things in one of the few decent worlds I'd landed in. Admittedly not the first time I'd had a bad time on arriving in a new world, but this time a lot of it was my fault whether intentionally or no.

The worst was that stupid damned charm. It must have been running since I met Roseluck. Which means that what happened with Blitzen was just the charm making her attracted to me. I still didn't know what I was feeling about that kiss and now it was all bullshit. I could feel hot tears leaking from my eyes onto my pillow and I just wished everything would go away.

Yay! Still alive here. Been a bit of a whirlwind with changing jobs, new stresses, getting sick as all get out, etc... but here's a new chapter and Eleanor's first day comes to a close.