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Primal Fear

by Aragon

Chapter 1: Nightmares


“I am not
afraid of the monsters”

Those were her words, muttered in the middle of the dark night, muttered when she was still at home. A friend stood by her side, looking at her with worried eyes. But she didn’t mind.

Her mind was fresh and clean and simple, and she felt comfortable. She was not afraid, she felt brave and bold. Nothing could hurt her. She not only said the words, she meant them. She believed in them. She knew they were true. She was not afraid of the monsters.

“But everypony is,” said her friend.

"Everypony is afraid of them"

A student, a know-it-all, the smartest mare she’d ever known. “That’s the reason why we don’t go in there at night.”


Her friend was worried about her, she was scared. Because even being the smartest mare she’d ever known, she was still just a normal pony.

And she smiled at her friend's demeanor

“Everypony is afraid,” she replied proudly. “Everypony, but me. I’ll go there, and spend the night in the forest if you don’t believe me!”

Her friend tried to stop her, tried to scream it wasn’t necessary, but it was already too late. She wouldn’t hear the student’s words, she wouldn’t reason with her. No sense in running away from her own actions now. She was going there.

She would prove the world what she was made of.

“I am not
afraid of the monsters”

She repeated the words, enjoying her own bravado. And then she flew away.

She flew to the forest.

She would prove herself

She flew to the Everfree.


And the stars and the Moon stopped shining, and she could see nothing once she entered the Forest.





The Everfree.




Where monsters await.






She was not afraid of the monsters, those had been her words, those had been her thoughts. She could fight the monsters; she could run from the monsters. She had done so before. She had been there before and she had survived. She had never felt afraid of it. She had never had a reason to be truly afraid.

She was invincible.


But the night was dark and the air was cold, and she realized she was alone.


For entering the Forest was not a simple goal, and spending the night was not a mortal’s option. The trees were shaking, the wolves were howling, and she realized her mistake.

“I’ve never been
alone here before”

But she wouldn’t fly away. She didn’t feel the fear.

She only felt cold.



For the night was dark and the air was cold, and she was now alone. She walked into the forest, looking always ahead. She wasn’t scared of the monsters. She could fight, or she could run.



And the wolves were still howling, but she didn’t mind. And then she heard hoofsteps, right behind her, clear against the relative silence of the Everfree.

And for a moment, her mind froze

Clop

Clop

Clop




And then she heard it breathe, and then she heard its beating heart.




Thump

Thump

Thump

"I can hear it"

She couldn’t hear her own, but she could hear the thing’s heart. The beast’s heart. The monster’s heart.


And she ran.

And for a moment, she could see the trees waving her goodbye

And she ran and ran and flew away, and for a moment she thought she was safe.

It appeared right in front of her

She was not.




Right there, in front of her eyes. Darkness all around her, the only thing she could see was that thing, that beast, that monster. The footsteps had stopped. The breathing had stopped. The beating of the heart had stopped. Everything was silent. She still couldn’t hear the beat of her own heart.



There it was. Ridiculous, stupid, laughable.

Eerie.

She didn’t feel fear, she was not scared. She was too strong to be afraid of such a thing. It was just a head, a stupid head. Nothing she couldn’t fight.


She was not scared.

She only felt cold.



Looking at her, with those cold eyes. With that empty smile. Just a head, she could see no body. A floating stupidity, a levitating madness.

A monster.



And she was brave and she was young, and she was not afraid of the monsters. So she didn’t fight, she didn’t run. She stood there, looking at it defiantly. Confident.

And the monster changed

And that was her mistake.


And the thing went by before she could move, and she felt her legs and wings freeze, and she knew that thing was not alive.

She didn’t feel fear.



She just felt cold.


And the monster made no sound, and just stared at her.

And she could see the black tears, and she tried to run away, but she couldn’t. She tried to scream, to call for help, but she couldn’t. She was frozen. And it was crying.

But the tears didn't fall to the ground

But those weren’t true tears, and she knew. She knew it was not a signal of weakness or pain or sadness. The black tears were just another symbol, another monster. Just like its eyes, just like its smile.

“I am not
afraid of the monsters”

she thought.


And then

the black tear, changed;

it moved.

And the dark of the night became light, and the black tears were alive. A show of madness, of terror, of beauty unfolded in front of her eyes. They were more than black. They were a void, a space where nothing could exist. And she knew that the black tears were alive, and she knew it had seen her.

And the black tears took her legs.

And the black tears took her wings.

And she felt the pain in her head.

And then she realized, she wasn’t feeling cold. She had never felt the cold. She had always been warm, but she had always been alone.

She was alone and scared.





She had always been scared.





Because her friends weren’t there, they weren’t by her side, and the monster was in her head, in her mind, in her soul.

The monster was her.

And she finally said, she finally admitted.

“I am afraid
of the monsters”


Because everypony is
that’s the reason
why we don’t go in there at night.

To the Everfree.



To the place where the monsters await.

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