Where did it all go wrong? Ponies. Ponies is where it went all wrong.

Sure, you never had a luxurious life in any sense of the word. Lived with your parents until they kicked you out for smoking weed. Bummed off your friends until they were sick of you and you were forced to find some money of your own. Somehow managed to get a job as a gas station attendant, pumping gas for rich kids in their My Little Pony t-shirts. That’s definitely where it went wrong. Wrong-er, at least.

Did it really matter? It was all wrong, wrong from the beginning. People like you weren’t destined for anything. All your future held was endlessly trading one drug addiction for another. It wasn’t three hours ago that you called your weed dealer to find out that he had been arrested. It was getting harder and harder to get high in this city; the new mayor was calling a serious crackdown on drug users, and sources were disappearing like mayflies. You found it amazing that you could counteract withdrawal simply by getting addicted to a different drug.

You weren’t so sure about this one, however. After the news about your weed dealer, you called up your friend Pete and he excitedly told you about this new high 4chan was talking about. That should have been your first clue. In retrospect, you should’ve asked him which board. Regardless, you still showed up to the bowling alley a few hours later. Pete showed up minutes later and gave you a bro-hoof.

“Hey, how’s it been lately?” he chortles.

You smirk at him. “Cut the small talk. What’s this new drug you’re raving about? Have you actually done it before?”

He practically giggles at you, which comes as a shock. “Dude, this is the best thing you’re ever going to experience in your life. Not only that, but one high is twelve hours long. You’ve gotta set aside TIME to do this, baby.” He chortles again, and practically falls on you.

“Dude, seriously, are you high right now?” you ask, pushing him off. “And don’t call me baby.”

“Whatever,” he snorts. “Just follow me. I promise, you’re going to enjoy this.”

He starts walking into the bowling alley. “A-are we going inside? You mean this dealer operates within the bowling alley?”

Pete giggles again. He’s really gotta stop doing that. “Everything about this is going to completely blow your mind, sister.”

You glare at him, then shrug and follow him into the alley and up to the counter. “Hey,” he whispers to the girl at the counter. “We’re here for the, uh, ponies.” The last word is whispered, and yet it clearly has an effect on the counter-girl. She enthusiastically nods her head and unlocks the maintenance door to the side to let us through.

“Down the hall and to the right,” she whispers back. Pete nods happily, and you, still confused out of your mind, decide to follow him. The door closes behind you, and you silently make your way down the well-lit hallway. Upon reaching the corner, you turn to find another staffed counter.

“You two a couple?” the counter-girl asks when you walk up.

You splutter. “N-no! What the hell?”

Pete laughs at you, and then turns to the girl. “No, we’re both going to be pets today.”

The girl nods, and you turn to stare at Pete. What the hell did that mean? The girl returns moments later with two red and black speckled pills. She hands one to you and the other to Pete.

“There are changing rooms down the hall—you can both disrobe and take your pills in there,” she says.

Pete nods enthusiastically and practically skips down the hall. You roll your eyes, and slowly make your way to your own changing room. None of this made any sense. Pete was acting like a schoolgirl, you were getting offered drugs inside a bowling alley, pets were involved somehow, and for some reason you had to be naked for it? You look down at the pill. A strong scent of tomato sauce hits your nose.

For a moment you are reminded of home.

You shake your head, and push your way into a changing room. The door closes behind you with a click. You turn around and try to open it back up. Locked.

This place was just getting freakier and freakier.

There was another door on the other side of the room, which also appeared to be locked, and a mirror on one of the other two walls. Oh well, you think. Time to see if this was worth the trouble. You slip off your clothing, and look at yourself in the mirror for a moment. Those stupid breasts. You really wish they would just… go away. You don’t even want to direct your eyes further south. It would just be too upsetting. Besides, you were supposed to be getting high, here.

You look down at the pill again. It just seemed far too ominous.

Fuck it.

You take a deep breath, and dry swallow the pill.

It feels like spaghetti squirming its way down your throat.

You stand there and look at the door to your right. Were you supposed to stay in this little room for twelve hours? How long was it going to take for this to kick in anywa—

Your thoughts are interrupted by a sudden spasming in your thigh. You fall to the ground with a grunt and look down at your legs.

Legs weren’t supposed to bend that way.

Your eyes widen as you trace the sensations up your legs and to your stomach. Orange… orange hair was sprouting all over your body. Holy shit.

“What?” you scream. “What’s going o—”

What was that.

You look down to your crotch, and your eyes widen.

What. Was. That.

You scream and jump up, but find that you can no longer balance on your legs. They feel wobbly, and disjointed. You crash to the ground and hit your head on the little bench. The last thing you see before blacking out is a horsey grin staring back at you from the mirror.