Sirens… everywhere! Behind us, in the front, to the sides, up above, the sirens are everywhere. Yet, despite this, Fireball drives on, seemingly indifferent.

My eyes scan the seemingly impenetrable line of police cars. This is it it seems. We never made it, we failed. I failed.

I watched in horror as a monstrous car rises out of the wall and and creates a long dark expanse that engulfs our vehicle. I can't see the lights and the siren is deafening. It's on two wheels and is barely rising now. I wanna get up and fly away, but my wings won't respond to my commands. My legs fail to even twitch and even my tail is frozen. It's like fate has destined me to end this way. Oblivious to my silent plea, the truck continues to accelerate.

I can't see anything except the enormous piece of machinery right in front of me. It is a giant shark among minnows. Besides that it doesn't seem to be hindered by anything else. I can hear the sirens gaining in intensity and cringe slightly. I really thought we'd have a better end than this, oh well, fate is a cruel bitch, we had a long run. Everything slows as I close my eyes. I watch in slow motion as the front of the truck compresses as it hits the wall of cars. All our belongings are thrown forward, and yet, I watch. My eyes turn back to the massive cop car. It has turned into a blot in the sky that is quickly falling towards me. I don't care though, I’ve already lost the battle. My eyes finally close as the Shadow descends onto me.

Giving out a yell I sit up and look around frantically. For one, I’m back in the cab of the vehicle, two, the light from outside has dimmed and we are still racing at top speed through the country. It was just a dream, only a dream, a nightmare. I haven't had a nightmare in over 25 years and now I’m having them night after night...

I look over and see Fireball staring ahead, trying to look like she's ignoring me, but we've known each other long enough to tell what the other is thinking. She's... I can't think about it...

“Thanks... for bringing me back in here... the wind helped calm me down.”

She doesn't even acknowledge my presence or the fact that I spoke. Playing with my hooves nervously I try again. “So... um... anything new?” Again, no answer. Luna dammit all! “Fireball, please just speak to me. I feel like I’m missing something here.”

I hear her suppress a sniff and try to choke out a few words but I can't quite understand them. Sighing to myself I scoot over and sit next to her. “Hey... I’m sorry for what I said... I just can't let go of the past and pretend like it wasn't real...” I cringe as I let loose words I knew would incite a response. Thankfully there was no response forthcoming, so I counted my blessings and pushed forward. “Look, I know you are touchy about this subject, so lets just forget it ever happened okay?” Seeing no answer was going to come I guess I’ll have to guilt her into it. “You're putting off this... aura... and it's really dimming the mood in the car... come on and smile for me, please?” I see something tugging at her lips. I've got her now. “Don't make me tickle you, you know I know where you are ticklish.” Reaching over I'm poised over her ears and ready to strike.

Before I can however she spins towards me, beaming like a lighthouse. “Oh come on, no fair! I can't fight back because I'm driving!” Yes! Score, usually she has to get me out of the bad mood, well guess what, my turn, woo!

“That's the point though, I can get you back for all those surprises you gave me!”

“Oh, you mean the surprises back in 'Equestria' or the surprises 'Here'?”

Smiling I knew this is a trick question, I can see her frowning a little bit, but I'm determined not to let it come back. “From both you silly filly, you've done so much to me that I'm going to NEED twenty five years to make it up!” There we go, now she's really beaming. There's absolutely nothing that can spoil this moment. Wait I don't have any wood in the car do I? Dammit...

Sirens blare and I can see little blue and red lights approaching from behind. “Well shit, and here I thought we could go a day without getting rammed up the ass with cop cars...” Sighing I climb back over in my seat and look at Fireball expectantly.

“Well then, I guess we better show them how fast we can go correct?” Well, last I checked this truck could go around 110... or at least, that's what I’ve been up to and OH MY SWEET CELESTIA WE ARE ACCELERATING!

My truck seemed to scream with joy as it roared down the road. The police cars, having noticed the acceleration, also put on the speed to try and catch us. Rounding a corner I nearly flew into Fireball as my hooves lost traction and we started doing a bicycle with the truck, which I don't know is really possible or there's some magic afoot. Either way I can feel the right wheel leave the ground and my flank leave the seat, which is not at all fun.

Finally the wheels regain traction and the sirens start to lose the intensity that they began with. Sighing in relief I let a smile creep to my face. There was absolutely nothing that could stop us... except that ridiculously long LINE OF COP CARS! “FIREBALL SLOW DOWN MY TRUCK CAN'T RAMP THAT!”

“I DON'T CARE, I'M NOT ABOUT TO GET CAUGHT! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA I HAVE A NEED FOR SPEED MOTHER BUCKERS!” I have no idea what she's talking about, but I don't want to die. I'm going to hate myself for this.

Diving under the drivers side I floor the brake pedal and stick my hoof under the gas pedal to keep it from going down. It hurts SOO much... “God dammit... this hurts...”

“Then stop doing it! I can make it!” No... you can't ow this hurts.

“Look, we're done, you can't make this jump and there's no turning around. Just stop, worst comes to worst you have to incinerate something and I might be able to carry you away.” Actually I'm pretty sure she's too heavy, but anything to get rid of this pressure!

After a grueling five seconds I feel the pressure decrease and the truck start to slow. My inner sense starts spitting out numbers that I really can't care any less about, so I just ignore them. Well... looks like we are boned, at least we'll be going out together. Another few seconds pass as the truck screeches to a halt. My brain informs me that we have indeed stopped, even though I can't seem to pry myself from the floor boards.

“Get out of the car!” a voice blares.

I hear the window roll down and I groan as I try to pry myself off the floor. “Well, since you asked so nicely, FUCK OFF!” Great... Fireball is making some more friends.

There's a pause, apparently they didn't expect that. “Ma'am, please exit the vehicle or else we will have to come in oursel- hey what are you doing?”

After finally managing to extract myself from the floor I peeked at the line of cars and the one lone figure making it's way through them. He sorta kinda maybe looked like my ass hole of a neighbor... but his eyes are yellow and his actions are purposeful. His grin looks evil and every other step his hair parted to show off two things protruding out from his head. “Well if it isn't my favorite little ponies.” Okay, this went from awkward to crazy as fuck awkward. “Congratulations on making it this far despite my best efforts. I'm almost glad you did, gave you a chance to prove yourself..” Slowly making his way over to the drivers side door he then got the window rolled up in his face and the door locked.

“Sorry crazy dude, this is private property.” I almost burst out laughing, but I felt that I needed to stay silent.

“Well I’m sorry miss, but I would like to come inside.” As he said that he snapped his fingers and the door unlocked. Before he could open it however, Fireball delicately pushed the lock mechanism again, keeping him out. Frowning the stranger again, snapped his fingers and unlocked the door, eliciting the same response as before. Sighing he looked Fireball right in the eyes. “You were always my favorite, always the more chaotic of bunch.” Wait, did he raise us? He's a human, what the hell am I thinking?

Again, he tries unlocking the door, and again Fireball prevents him from opening it. “You're kidding me right?” He tries to open the door and unlock it at the same time but Fireball's glow surrounds the door and keeps it shut, locking it once again. “You know, it really is no fun after the fifth time you know?”

I can see the corners of her mouth twitch up into a smile. “It is for me! I haven't even had a drop of alcohol yet either!” Note to self, never leave beer unattended with Fireball while leaving the house without a way separate way back in. Sighing again, the man gives up and starts to leave the driver's side door alone.

Making his way over, he rounded the truck to my side and stared at me, his smile gone, an evil grin in it's place. “Are you going to open the door, or am I?” He sounds so arrogant! I just want to punch him in the face! Who does this ass hole think he is, God? “I'm assuming that's a no.” Snapping his fingers the door unlocks, this time reaching for the handle in the same motion. I did not want this man inside my vehicle, and since he had no badge I could call this self defense, right? Oh fuck it, I just punch him in the face, through the window.

My hoof is strewn with glass shards and starting to bleed, but the scowl on my face never wavers. I hear a noise in the background and turn to see a happily grinning Fireball clapping her hooves. “That was AWESOME! Though the truck now doesn't have a passenger window, but still, THAT WAS SO COOL!”

“Yes, quite.” My head and ears spin around lightning quick only to meet a fist in the face. My body flies back and hits Fireball, I can tell she's effectively pinned. Through the daze I can see the door being ripped off it's hinges and thrown onto the side of the highway. “You know, I have things to do, ponies to punish, and people to terrorize, so I just want a quick visit to you two and all I get is a hoof to the face. Do you know who I am?”

Through my daze my body refuses to respond to any signals my brain throws at it, but I can barely hear Fireball squeak out, “Dissy?”

I can see my evil neighbor grin and nod. He points to Fireball, “I am your sponsor,” his finger moves over to me, “and I am your creator.” My brain refuses to compute these lines and is about to shut down... I can't go unconscious, this... thing, needs to be dealt with. Struggling back into reality I see him still smiling, the protrusions in his hair seem to have grown a bit, now showing that one was a blue twisted horn and the other was a bit straighter. I couldn't tell what species they were from, but I knew I would if they got any longer.

“Let me tell you a little long forgotten story. Don't worry Fireball you'll get your turn.” I hear her gulp behind me, but my focus is sorely on the man in front of me. “When I first came to rule it was absolutely glorious, ponies were digging holes, clouds were pink, and it hailed rock candy every other day. None of the three tribes could challenge me, and the Alicorns were too much of cowards to do so. However, there were a few books I just couldn't quite find, books that, well, don't exist anymore for special reasons that you need not hear. Anyways, back to the subject at hand, or is it hoof I guess.” He stops and lets out a guffaw of laughter that lasts for a full minute. I don't know why he's laughing, maybe he'll tell us now that he's not. “I would apologize, but I’m not sorry, you two just look so pathetic with those scared little faces on you.” He lets out another bout of chuckles. “Ahem, well, you two are mood killers. Now, lets see, where way I?” I feel a hoof move behind me. “Ah yes, Fireball?”

“You were about to let us go?” I can hear the fear in her voice.

“Oh yes, the book burning, thank you.” Apparently he didn't even notice, that or he's very hard at hearing. “As I said, I couldn't get a hold of these books because SOME unicorn decided to up and make an anti chaos field. This created a problem, so, I fixed it. Using a bit of chaotic energy I created life! Shocker isn't it? If you think about it though, chaos isn't just for destruction, the sun is chaotic and yet it provides warmth, oh my you have to hear about this one time that I-” He coughs a little before grinning again. “Maybe you two will hear that later. So as I was saying, I created another pony race. Being the creature I am I decided not to name it because I thought, and still think, it was hilarious when ponies ran around screaming that they were being attacked by 'things'. Can you believe it? They said 'THINGS'.” He starts laughing again. By this time my brain has managed to reboot. I can't believe that this is Discord, HE'S BEEN MY BUCKING NEIGHBOR FOR TWENTY FIVE BUCKING YEARS? What is wrong with this thing! He coughs again. “Well, I think you can see where we are going with this story. The new race of ponies went out and managed to destroy all but three copies of the book. The first copy was lost on an expedition this silly unicorn thought was important. The second was in a private library so I felt no need to go after it. The third however, landed in the hooves of two impertinent selfish little brats that,” he blew out calmingly. “That of course is of no consequence, after stoning me they hunted down my beloved new subjects and well, the rest is history. Not quite actually. Well, after those two little brats grabbed the throne they took it upon themselves to make the ponies I created part of society. Can you believe that? They were taking MY creations and turning them AGAINST me! How much more rude can a pony get!” He licked his new fang that jutted from the left side of his mouth. “They named them bat ponies and they became 'PRINCESS' Luna's guard, can you believe the audacity those two wanna be's had? It took a long time, but eventually the bat ponies started to die out. By the time that I broke free for a THIRD time, there were only four of you left, or at least, descendants with the true blood. Most of them had intermarried and disrupted their bloodline.”

He got real close, his eyes boring into my soul. “This all comes down to a single question my dear subject.” His smile seems to be all over his face. I try to scoot backward, but I hear Fireball whimper slightly so I cease my backwards motion. “Two of the ponies killed themselves, they were old enough to already know of their past, the third had enough sense to try and save her race, she is is the only female left, and you are the only male. I would create more of you, but since I find myself unable to, sending all you ponies to this waste dump was very difficult, I need other means, more crude means, of repopulating the subjects I long to have.” He slithered backwards, leaving me breathing rapidly and unsteadily. “I’ll let you think on that.”

My brain starts to shut down. Too much information, it can't all be true. There's no way, mom and dad, they... NO it can't be true I’m not just the creation of chaos! I'm not... I’m not... I’m... not, am I?

I saw Shadow's eyes close, the grimace and scared expression frozen upon his face for the duration of his time unconscious. I was very much afraid of this new variable in our journey. It was all fun and games until Shadow decided to... never-mind. Now Discord is pulling me out from under the still form of my life long companion. “Now it's your turn little pony. I want to say that it's been a pleasure being an influence in your life and also tell you that you have 'I told you so' rights.” With a snap of his fingers and a turn of my head I watch as all the police cars simply vanish, as if they were never there. “You COULD have missed me, COULD have gone through it, which is what I like so much about you, you have spunk, you are crazy, you are so... deliciously chaotic.” He licked his lips. “Did you ever wonder why your parents were hesitant around you when you first learned your talent? Were you even the least bit surprised when you were assigned somepony to make sure you didn't get into trouble? Did you even notice that you got door duty by the princess' court chambers almost every day? Fire is my territory my little pony. Fire destroys, it burns, it incinerates, it consumes. Everypony was so afraid of you because you were following my path, the path of chaos, and it was starting to show. Oh isn't wonderful? My start pupil has developed so much!” He put a hand up to his chin and started tapping it thoughtfully. It was kinda funny before, the way everypony looked at me. I really didn't mind sitting by the door because I got to see all the different kinds of ponies. My mom and dad did act a bit awkward when I showed them my cutie mark. After awhile though, they started being less tense and happier.

Could what Discord is saying be the truth? I highly doubt it. Seriously, did he expect me to believe that I'm pretty much worshiping him by practicing fire magic? That's absolutely hilarious!

Without cause I began to laugh. I can't believe this guy. To think he was our neighbor for about five years! Wow is he stupid! Seriously, how stupid can Discord get? Well this IS Discord we are talking about, not some of the mill idiot. Hmm I wonder how an idiot runs a mill, that seems like an important job.

I look back at my host to see him watching intentionally. “Are you quite done my faithful student?” Wow, what's with the pet names? Well, it's only me if I answer so let's grab some popcorn and watch the shit storm.

His face slowly starts to frown. I can feel the disappointment and happy mood disappear from him. “Well then, be that way little unicorn. I wish I could harness the chaotic magic you hold in your brain and distribute it. That would make my job a whole lot easier.”

“Before I leave you with the new information that you've learned I would like to give you a choice. I can teach you more, you know. I AM the prevailing knowledgebase for all things chaotic you know.” He winks at me and spreads his arms. “You don't even have to change your life any, you just have to do me a favor every now and then and i'll teach you anything you wish to know.” He got that hungry look. “All you have to do is say yes.”

I have to stay truthful with myself, I feel conflicted. I want to yell back at him, to tell him he was wrong, but I can't help but think that maybe he is telling the truth. Maybe I am just a chaotic pony and it was only a matter of time before I truly went insane.

But wait, if I'm going to go insane, why not have some fun with it first? Why skip to the end of the story when the middle is so much more interesting! Think of the pranks and hilarity that can ensue. Rubbing my hooves together I chuckled evilly. Celestia forbid I lose the chance to fully enjoy life. IF I ever get back to canterlot the first thing I'm doing is putting a springboard on princess Celestia's table and launching a cake in her face. Luna will laugh and Celestia will laugh, and then I get to die happy.

“I trust you've seen the good this decision will do for you?” His voice was ice cold and reeked of victory. Oh boy I can't wait for this explosion!

I dropped my voice down lower. “Why yes I have my dear Discord, I will cause mayhem and wreak havoc. I shall put salt in the punch and poison joke in all the nobles hair! It will be fan fucking tastic!”

Smiling stupidly I watched as his face turned from glee, to disbelief, to anger. “NO NO! YOU STUPID PONY! THOSE ARE PARLOR TRICKS!” I swear his eyes are so red right now. I wonder what'd happen if I poked him. Oh well let's find out. “I can teach you so much mor- why did you just touch me?”

Shrugging I decided that that was a question worthy of an answer. “I have no bucking clue, but I'm going to do it again,” and so I did. I did it again, and again and again.

I would have continued doing it too if it weren't for the fact that he caught my hoof the fifth time and held it there. I could swear that if you took a needle to him he'd pop like a balloon. It was so funny watching the king of chaos get so riled up about something so small, so I poked him with my other hoof. “It feels so jiggly, have you been letting yourself go? You know there are some programs that can help you with that sort of thing. I heard they are called self help programs. I don't know why they are called self help programs when you are obviously letting someone else help you help yourself. That doesn't make any sense I mean-” Oh buck... I think I went to far, I can actually watch him breathe.

I shake Shadow in hopes that his unconscious state is just as aware of his sleeping state. Apparently it is not. Wellp plan B. He yelps, shoots up, sees Discord opens the door and jumps out, all in one motion I might add, pretty impressive if you ask me. Taking one look at the total peeved chaos god I gave chase.

After jumping out I found that I could not see my partner in crime. Well I wonder where he has gone, oh cool now I'm flying. “Weee! I didn't know you could hold a pony while flying.”

“I can't.” Wow he already sounds out of breath. “But I can carry one.” Oh boy i've only had this happen to me once before in battle training! It's so much- WOOP!

Shadow flipped upside down and flew upwards at the same time. Letting go of me he then positioned his back under me. My job was to simply flip myself over, like a cat. Oh I like cats. It's not that hard and I barely feel it when I land on his back. I can tell his speed has increased too. I remember them saying something about how a pony situated like I am now creates a more aerodynamic streamline thingy that makes the pegasus fly faster or something. I can certainly see the difference. We are definitely speeding along now. “Hey what's the rush, Discord can teleport, it's not like we can get far enough away from him.”

He panted a little before swallowing. “Don't ask me how I know, but he is about to explode, well in the anger sense, not literally, sorry to ruin your expectations.” He dodged around a car that swerved when it saw us pass. I saw a little girl so I waved at her. I smiled even brighter when she waved back, before pointing at me and saying something to her mother. I saw Shadow turn his head and sigh sadly. “I feel sorry for them. Unless they can get out of the blast zone quick eno-”

I suddenly felt pushed sideways by an unseen force. The car with the little girl and mom behind us actually flipped. I watched in slow motion as they rotated above us in a full arc before they landed on all four wheels and skidded to a stop.

I didn't have long to marvel at the miracle because soon Shadow was out of control as well. I suddenly felt his weight drop out from under me. I clenched my legs tighter so I wouldn't lose my grip and tried to flip him so he wouldn't get hurt. Usually pegasi aren't hurt that often from falling, but not often are they falling while unconscious.

I take the brunt of the crash, which was significant as we were probably going in excess of sixty miles an hour. It feels like the fur on my back has been shaved off and my spine my be bruised. I hope not, being a cripple does not sound like fun. Thankfully we came to a stop and I was still able to move all my appendages. That's a good thing, despite the fact that I can't get up, I'm in too much pain. As I start to drift into a painful sleep I hear a buzz. “You should have taken my offer, it will not be so generous, your friend now knows the consequences of abusing a power that I GAVE to him. Now he will have to choose between standing with you, or fighting with me.” As my eyes finally closed I heard him laugh maniacally, the only thing keeping me company as my brain shut down. Next Chapter: I hate trees. Estimated time remaining: 48 Minutes