The Ballad of Echo the Diamond Dog

by Rust

First published 13th of February, 2012

A human finds himself in Equestria... He decides to forsake Ponyville and see the world instead.

I always wanted to go to Equestria. When I got the chance, I took the deal without reading the fine print. To my surprise, I didn't arrive there as a pony, or even as a human. It seems I get to view this world from a different perspective than what I've imagined.

My name is Echo. I am a Diamond Dog.

---

-Edited by the one, the only, Nathan Traveler!
-(Cover by Jovial_Shake of fimfiction.net)
-Now featured on Equestriadaily.com!

(Prologue) A Message From Echo

Dear Reader,

On my first day in Equestria, I had my throat torn out.

I know, huh? Not what you'd expect from a cartoon world of happy, carefree ponies who learn about the magic of friendship. Nope. I get baptized into my new life with a fight to the death. What a way to roll out the welcome wagon.

Anyway, I suppose I should introduce myself before I begin recounting my tale. I am a diamond dog, in case you haven't noticed. I used to have a human name, just like you, but...I'm not that person anymore, so we can forget about it. You can call me Echo, if you want to call me anything besides "doggy," "boy," or "fleabag." And no, I will not fetch the god-damn stick for you. Get it yourself.

I'm sure you've read those stories about other humans who somehow stumble their way into Equestria. I'd like to tell you right now that absolutely ninety-two point eight percent of them are completely wrong. Let me guess, they followed the standard "wake up in the Everfree" shtick? Maybe they're still human, or they just wake up as a cute, cartoon horse with a tattoo on their ass. Or even, after some awkward shenanigans around Ponyville, they are turned into a pony so that they can spend the rest of their four-legged lives with their beloved, undoubtedly a member of the Elements of Harmony?

Predictable.

And, unrealistic.

The reality is, the few humans who do end up in Equestria rarely have it so easy. Usually, they end up like me. I don't mean as a diamond dog, either. More often than not, they end up dead or bleeding out on the side of the road. You see, Equestria isn't really the happy-go-lucky, peaceful realm of rainbows and puppy dogs. Well, admittedly, it looks that way, but that's besides the point. Equestria is just as dangerous, if not more so, as Earth. All those big bad monsters that run around willy-nilly cause a lot more havoc than you'd think. And Discord? Oh, man, that guy has got to be the biggest dick in history! (Counting Earth and Equestrian, of course.) The ponies you know so well? The only really difference between them and us is that they learn their lesson if you drive it into their skulls hard enough.

They can be just as prejudiced, just as spiteful, just as cruel as the average human. Greed, violence, and even racism can be seen in some of the more detestable examples of equine life.

Thankfully, a significant number of them aren't like that. At least, they aren't that way to me anymore. Not after I've carved out a place for myself, earned their respect and trust, yadda yadda yadda, that sort of thing.

Bottom line is, Equestria is eerily familiar to Earth. And yet...different. Mercifully different.

My first day there, I found this out the hard way. Why do you think I'm writing this with a claw dipped in ink? I haven't been able to use my throat for anything besides howling, whining, growling and eating for decades now.

So sit back, relax, and try not to get the facts mixed up with the truth.

My name is Echo. I am a diamond dog.

And this is my story.

(1) Never Trust a Man in a Matching Tracksuit

"I don't believe you."

The old man sitting across the table from me leaned back in his armchair and gave me a toothy grin, which quite frankly looked absolutely demented, as one of his canines was much larger than the other. He was wearing a tannish-grey tracksuit, with golden stripes running up the sides. His eyes seemed to be mismatched, as if they were different sizes. To complete his ridiculous appearance, he had a scraggly white fu-manchu going on that makes my pubic hair look like silk.

"What's not to believe?" he purred, in a velvety voice that somehow reminded me of Q, from Star Trek. "I'm offering you the chance to live out your dream. Haven't you always wanted to leave behind this frothing ball of filth for greener pastures? Have we not been discussing this for the past hour, or did I leave a beehive in my ear again... It's so hard to keep track of those things, you know. One would think the constant buzzing would give it away."

His demeanor was relaxed, yet strangley giddy, like a kid who goes into a toy store with his mom and thinks, "Okay, just play it cool." He was probably insane. I should have known better than to take him up on his offer for a cup of coffee to discuss My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. He'd seen me watching the newest episode on my laptop while I was riding home on the bus. Stupid public transportation. Why couldn't you have just thrown me a rapist or something? You know what those guys are about. Him? No freaking way.

Admittedly, the man knew his ponies pretty well. He seemed particularly learned in all the hypothetical stuff, like the founding of Equestria, the origins of the Princesses, and even some of the theories behind the Elements of Harmony. We spent the better part of twenty minutes just debating the concept of magic. To be honest, I'd never thought that a somewhat intellectual man like myself would ever end up in a run down coffee shop, discussing the theoretical physics of an imaginary land of adorable ponies. And then, simply out of the blue, he'd asked me if I wanted to go to Equestria.

Of course, my response was something along the lines of "Aw hell yeah!" Of course I wanted to go there. What kind of question is that? Any brony worth his salt would love to go there. And I am a very, very salty brony.

He said that he could send me there, and he was deadly serious. And now, here we are.

"Well, for one, Equestria isn't real, man. It's just a cartoon. That should have tipped you off from the start." There I go again, using my logical logic logically.

He laughed at this, and for some reason it echoed mysteriously around the coffee shop we were sitting in. "Ah, but who are you to decide what is real? Perhaps none of this is real, maybe it never existed! Maybe Equestria is the reality, and we're nothing but the cartoon?"

"Who are you to decide that it isn't real?" I shot back.

He only seemed to get smug at this. "Who aren't I to decide? Who am I? Who are you? Life's great mystery, I suppose. And yet, a rolling stone gathers no moss, but instead runs over the helpless woodland creatures in its path."

Whatever the hell this guy is on right now, I want some.

He continued, "But no rolling stone is created rolling. No, they all need just one little kick to send them on their merry way. That's what I'm offering you here."

"So, what, you want to kick me?" I deadpanned.

"More precisely, I want to punt you straight out of the universe!" He cackled then, and it reminded me of when my grandma used to make the dreaded "Mystery Meat" soup; she'd laugh like a witch boiling a foul brew. Which was kind of what she acted like, bless her dead heart.

I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. Maybe I should just humor this guy. It's not like I've got anything else to do today; I finished all my classes at the university, and all I have to look forward to now is enjoying some microwaved ramen noodles in my shabby little apartment in the Chinese district. I took a glance outside, and sure enough, it was raining again. It's always raining here. Unwilling to soak myself to the bone, I decided to play along.

"All right, let's say you could do this. Let's say, hypothetically, that you can actually boot me straight to Equestria. Why? Why would you do this?"

He scratched his beard, stroking it like it was a prize pumpkin at the county fair. "Why not?"

I was puzzled by this. "What do you mean, 'why not'?"

"Think of one good reason why I shouldn't. After all, based on what you've told me about yourself, it's not like you have much going for you here. Mix things up a little, my friend! Why not be an adorable animated equine for a while! Throw a little..." he waved his hand around as he searched for a word. "Throw a little chaos into the mix."

"You know what? Fine. Have your fun. Send me to Equestria. I don't care how you do it, or what I am when I get there. Surprise me. I don't know what you get out of this, and frankly, I'm not sure I want to. Deal?" I raised my hand for him across the table.

I would later regret ever saying those words.

"Deal," he smirked. His wizened old hand snaked out and shook mine firmly. There was a strange source of heat that rose from in-between our palms, but before I could react to it, the old coot let go and jumped up onto the table, surprisingly spry for someone who looked so old.

"Sayonara!" he cried, and wound his left foot back as if preparing for a penalty kick.

I tired to get up then. "Whoa, man, easy there-"

But I didn't have time to finish. His foot lit up with this weird light, and he whipped it toward me with unnatural speed. I barely had time to process the motion before his running sneaker collided with my face.

I felt the strangest sensation of falling, but not in any particular direction, as the world suddenly went dark.

My thoughts slowly spiraled down to blankness. Did I just get kicked in the face by an old man? Why was his foot glowing like that?

More importantly... I hope he hasn't stepped in any dog shit recently.

And then...

(2) Red of Tooth and Sharp of Claw

In the beginning... there was pain. Lots and lots of pain. My whole body felt like someone had decided to hit me over the head with a brick, toss me in a wood chipper, and than piece my body back together with a welding torch and some duct tape.

Usually when you regain consciousness to feel like this, your eyes fly open and the first thing you can think of is, "Holy shit, what did I do last night?"

Not me. I remembered everything. But... my eyes didn't fly open. I tried to open them, and they fluttered briefly, before closing again. They felt strange. Different, almost. My thoughts went back to the conversation I'd had with that crazy old punk from the coffee shop. Could he have really done it? My heart oddly leapt at the thought with joy, but my brain quickly took back control. I developed a mental list to help me determine my situation.

1.) Take an inventory of myself.

2.) Find out if I'm actually in Equestria.

3.) Find out WHERE in Equestria I am.

4.) ...

5.) Take over the world.

I'm an ambitious bastard, aren't I?

As far as I could tell from the weird signals my body was sending me, I was lying on my back, on some kind of cold, hard surface. I tried to open my eyes again, succeeding this time. The lids felt oddly heavy. This didn't do me any good, though, because wherever I was, it was pitch black. Oh well, at least I could move something. I roved my eyes around my sockets, and again I noticed how strange they felt. Whatever. I was on a roll now, so I moved on to the next phase of step one.

I tried my fingers next. I attempted to flex them, starting from pinkie to thumb. I couldn't be sure yet, but it seemed simpler in moving them, if that description makes any sense. I definetly felt something move, but it was if someone had stabbed a bike pump into my hands and inflated them. They felt several sizes larger, that much I could say for sure. Alright! That's a good sign! I can now officially say that I am not a pony! Ponies don't have fingers, somehow they get by just fine with their mouths. After a few minutes of finger twitches, I managed to make fists. Good. Now I can beat the false teeth out of that old guy next time I see him. Slowly, control over my fingers returned, and after a while I regained fully hand dexterity, but it still felt limited somehow.

I went for my arms next, staring with the shoulder muscles. Nothing happened. Huh. I switched back down to my hands again, rolling my wrists around instead, and working the forearm. What the hell? My forearms felt positively gigantic! I was kind of muscular before, but this just felt ridiculous. I then focused on my elbows, using the ground as leverage and lifting my forearms into the air, so that they were standing straight up. I was curious about my hands, so I slowly leaned my arms together until I felt them touch over my chest.

By the gods.

My hands were absolutely enormous now! They were thick and dense... and furry? I carefully ran my fingers over each other. Something felt odd. I started counting. One... Two... Three... Four... Uh-oh. It seemed that I only had four fingers now, including thumbs. These new digits felt much thicker and more robust, and I could feel something sharp on the end of each one, similar to a fingernail, but pointy. Claws, maybe? What exactly was I?

Some more wiggling around of my upper appendages eventually restored enough mobility to lift my arms up and about. I lifted them straight up, to encounter some kind of smooth resistance when they were three-quarters out. Huh. So I'm inside something, or underground. I gave the surface a shove, wincing as it abruptly gave way, letting in a blindingly white rectangle of light shine down onto me. I could hear bird calls, weirdly, and the sound of wind on trees. It was still winter where I'd been before, so this only encouraged my assumption that I was now in Equestria. Heart pounding with excitement, I pushed the rectangle as hard as I could. It literally flew off several feet into the air, before crashing down somewhere to the side.

The light was almost painful, as the sun was shining right down on my face. The sky was a uniform color, the palest of blues, and a few clouds chased each-other across the stratosphere. Blinded, I put a hand up to block the glare. A huge, meaty paw swung up where my arm should have been. Thick, stubby fingers, bulging forearms, and a relatively muscular bicep only served to confirm what I'd felt in the darkness. The entire limb was covered in what appeared to be a short, but thick coating of fur, longer on the outside edge where my elbow was.

Everything looked like it was straight out of a cartoon, I kid you not. I had a freaking outline, for Christ's sake! The colors were so much more solid than before, and there was a lot less detail to be seen. It was rather aesthetically appealing in a way, and I found that I enjoyed the new perspective immensely. Okay, I am now without a doubt in Equestria.

I reached up, grabbed the edges of my pit and hauled myself into a sitting position. The first thing I noticed was that I was still wearing the same clothes I'd had on in the coffee shop. My sweatshirt had torn open where my huge arms had grown, and my pants seemed to be strangely warped, as though my legs were broken underneath. Grimacing, I stuck my stubby thumbs under the waistband and tried to pull them off.

Rrrrrrip!

Shit. I guess I went and... ripped my pants. God damn you, Spongebob. Damn you to the blackest pits of hell.

I proceeded to tear the remains of my pants off my form, taking my shoes with them, revealing my legs to be covered in the same even coating of fur as my arms. That was where the similarities between my pairs of limbs ended, however. I ran my eyes over a brand spanking new set of animal legs. From the knee up, it felt pretty much the same. Below the knee, it seemed that the bottom of my foot had rounded out and lengthened, giving me an extra joint. I guess that means I would be walking around on tiptoes from now on. Wait, did I even have any toes? I glanced down again to reveal wide paws where my feet used to be, with similar stubby digits. Gleaming claws poked out from my toes. I wiggled them.

After another session of "get-to-know-you" with my new body, I pulled myself up and out of the pit, my new arms hauling me with ease. I sat on the edge and gazed around, taking in the new world.

I appeared to be on top of some kind of stepped pyramid in the middle of a tropical jungle. The container I had been in suspiciously looked like some kind of stone coffin, and it was covered in artfully crafted runes carved into the stone. I'd never been to anywhere equatorial before, but this seemed like the rainforest, almost. Huge trees with broad, palmy leaves stretched out of the jungle, hanging with snake-like vines and moss. From what I could see of the forest floor from my perch on the pyramid, it was covered in small ferns and dead foliage.

And it was roasting. This heat was almost unbearable. I glanced down at my sweatshirt and decided to make a few modifications. With a sharp claw, I cut it down the middle, cutting through the t-shirt underneath as well, opening it up as if it had a zipper, and tore away the ragged sleeves up to my elbows. Still not enough. I needed relief. Instinctively, I put my tongue out to pant, and found it oddly satisfying. I began to feel much better. All right, so I'm some kind of dog thing. Wait, that means... I whipped my head around to my backside, and sure enough, a short, shaggy tail was beating a soft rythym on the inside of the coffin.

I have a tail. ME FUCKING GUSTA.

I couldn't resist letting out a whoop of excitement. It came out more like a strangled yelp. Shocked, I tried to cover my mouth with my hands, but was met only with pain as they encountered flesh where before there was none. Suprised by this new discovery, I ran my paws over my new face, gingerly working out the shape. A long muzzle. Wet nose. Angled forehead. Soft, tufted ears. Bushy fur on the sides of my elongated jaw. I put an experimental finger in my mouth and winced. Sharp teeth, too.

What am I? That question now took priority above all else. I looked around again. It's not like I'm going to find a mirror in the middle of the jungle, so a river would be the next best thing. Plus, this heat was making me thirsty. There was a depression in the general layout in the forest some distance to the west. When looking for water, always go down. That's a general rule of thumb for survival.

Another good rule for survival is that a scavenger usually makes it to the end. With this in mind, I pilfered what I could from my clothes. Shoelaces from my discarded shoes, a few strips of denim from my abandoned pants, and my wallet, which still contained a few crumbled bills and debit cards. I still had my backpack as well, and inside I found my water bottle and my half filled three-ring binder for my psychology class. I rummaged around through the pack until I came across a jackknife I kept in a hidden pocket. The city I'd lived in had a reputation for being unfriendly at night, and from what I'd seen on Animal Planet, the jungle wasn't exactly a stroll through suburbia. I flicked the blade open to make sure it worked, then closed it and slid it onto one of my backpack's straps by the belt clip. After readjusting the straps for my new body, I slipped it back on.

With my course in mind, I pushed off the edge of the container, landing on extremely wobbly legs. Almost falling over, I managed to grab hold of the edge to steady myself. I groaned. Guess this means I'm going to have to learn how to walk all over again.

I took a quick peek over the side of the pyramid and mentally screamed every known swear in the english and equestrian dictionary. That's a lot of stairs. And here I was without a slinky...

Battered and sore, I had finally managed to reach the bottom. After the horror that was the staircase from hell, I can now understand why all those lazy bastards I see at the mall just take the escalator. Walking on flat ground was easier, much easier, and I soon found out that my absurdly long arms could be added into the motion. Soon enough, I was loping around at a brisk pace, Donkey Kong style.

As I made my way in what I hoped was a western direction, I couldn't help but notice how intense everything was. It seemed that my sense of smell was incredibly developed now, and I could smell everything from the mold on the underside of a leaf, to the laundry detergent I'd used on my now-sleeveless sweatshirt. My hearing was superb as well, and the smallest rustle of a plant could be heard crystal clear.

The jungle was vibrantly alive, and it seemed almost ridiculous how much life there was. The light shone down in brilliant sunbeams through gaps in the canopy, cutting through the silky shadows of the forest floor. The cries of birds were continuously overlapping, and yet eerily melodic, as if they were singing in some grand musical score that I couldn't possibly comprehend.

After about half an hour of loping through the jungle, I emerged from the shadows onto a sandy riverbank. The river itself was slightly brown, but it flowed swiftly and the surface was smooth. I bent down onto all fours by the edge and greedily slurped up as much water as I could. It tasted like liquid sunshine, despite the fact that there were bits of mud and bugs in it. I filled up my water bottle to the brim, and drank my fill a second time.

My thirst slaked, I now looked into the water to see what I had become. A noble, wolfish face cuiously looked back at me, and I was reminded faintly of the cartoon version of Balto. I smiled, and the face smiled back at me, baring wicked fangs that glimmered in the sunlight. My fur was a dusty brown, faintly streaked with red, and the underside of my new face, as well as my chest, was a creamy tan. My eyes had big black pupils, and very little discernible color to them. I wiggled my eyebrows roguishly, and laughed at how it looked. It sounded like a mix between an eighteen wheeler downshifting on the highway and a pig gargling molasses.

And yes, I've heard a pig gargle molasses. Don't ask. It's a very, very weird story.

It seemed that along with my new body, I had a new voice as well. "Do re mi fa so la ti do!" I sang, though it came out more like an off-key howl.

I pointed at my reflection. "You talkin' to me? Are you talkin to me?" My new voice was gruff and deep, and it felt like I was growling every time I said something. I could have some fun with this.

"I gotta do what I gotta do." Rocky Balboa impersonation? Dead on.

"Come with me if you want to live." The Terminator. Sexy.

"Euuuughghghghghgh!" It seemed I could now perfectly imitate Chewbacca, as well.

I couldn't help but cackle at this, a dry hyena-like chuckle. I spent the next few minutes trying out my new facial expressions, occasionally laughing some more when one struck me as absurd.

A sudden crashing in the undergrowth snapped me out of my fun. My ears whipped around before I did, straining to identify the source of the commotion. The noises grew closer, and developed into the solid rhythm that I somehow instinctively knew was the sound of a running pony.

As if to confirm this, a pony burst out from the undergrowth, running at full speed, eyes widening at the sight of the river as it skidded to a halt. It looked this way and that, and I could see fear in its movements. I looked at it carefully, taking in the sight of the first pony I would see in Equestria.

It was a mare. A pegasus, to be precise. Her coat was a sandy tan, and her long, unkempt mane was black, though streaked with lighter mixes of gray. From under an explorer's hat perched on her head, experienced magenta eyes shone brightly. She wore some kind of collared khaki shirt, and saddlebags were draped over this. Her cutie mark was a blue compass. One of her wings was heavily bandaged, as if broken... And she looked exactly like she did in the show.

Sweet baby Luna in her cradle, it's Daring Do!

Of all the ponies I'd thought about being able to meet, she was the one I'd least expected. The adventurer looked a little worse for wear, and she was panting hard, indicating that she'd been running fast and far. She hadn't noticed me yet, probably due to my earthy fur and green sweatshirt. Summoning up my courage and all known etiquette about greeting a sentient member of an opposite species, I spoke my first words to a pony in Equestria.

"Sup?"

Daring Do whirled around, surprised by my presence. She shook her head and groaned to herself, "Of course, there's always one more when I least expect it. Why can't I just make a clean getaway for once. For once!" She obviously thought I meant harm, judging by the way that she was holding herself now, ready to bolt away down the riverbank. I had absolutely no intentions of doing so. In fact, she seemed like she could use a hoof, er, paw, right now.

"Whoa, chill out, miss. I'm not going to do anything to you," I said as gently as possible, but my new voice didn't make it sound very peaceful.

Her eyes narrowed. "Yeah, right! Like I'd believe a Diamond Dog! You guys would sell your own grandmare if it meant you'd get a few more jewels to snack on. Who do you work for, huh? Did Auihzotl send you?"

So I was a Diamond Dog, then. And apparently I ate gems. Huh. This explained her behavior, she probably thought I was going to attack her and rob her blind. No doubt she was loaded up with rare priceless treasures that I'd find delicious. I wonder what else could eat? I was beginning to feel a bit peckish.

I held up my paws in the classic "I surrender" pose. "Look, we could argue who sent me all day. I couldn't even answer that for you if I wanted to, believe me. But what's important here is that you look like you need some help. Do you want some?"

"Why would a mangy mutt like you help a pony?" she asked, disbelief clearly etched onto her face.

I recalled the old man in the coffee shop. "Why not? It's not like I've got anything else to do today."

Daring Do gave me a strange look, then. "You don't act like a Diamond Dog."

"Nope!" I said happily.

A distant crashing echoed in the distance, and both our sets of ears immediately flicked over to the source, farther into the undergrowth. Daring Do turned to me, desperation clearly written on her face. "They're coming! Ahuizotl's pets have been chasing me for miles now, but I can't clear this river. I don't know who you are, but please, I do need your help!"

I interlaced my fingers and cracked my bulky knuckles, making several loud pops echo across the river. "Anything for a lady in distress," I solemnly stated, and made an eloquent bow. I then strode up to her and offered her my paw. "But if I help you out, you have to answer a few questions for me."

The crashing sounded again, much closer. Daring Do grabbed my massive paw, which pretty much swallowed up her hoof, and shook it vigorously. "Deal!"

I gave her my best Ace Ventura impersonation. "Alllllllll righty then!" I turned and faced the undergrowth, was was now rumbling with the noises of her pursuers. I recalled the episode that Daring Do had been in, and I distinctly remembered the beasts that were approaching. "So, let me guess at what we've got coming out of there. Five cats: a tiger, a puma, a cheetah, a bobcat, and one itty bitty little fluff-ball of a kitten."

Damn, I'm good. This is what being a brony does to you, I guess.

"Uh, yeah... but how did you know that?" She stared at me like I had grown a second head.

"Internet." The crashing grew even closer. They were almost on top of us now, and I fancied that I could see some of the undergrowth shaking a ways off. I instinctively flexed my hands, stiffening my fingers, and the black claws coming out of them suddenly extended several inches, the dark edges gleaming like daggers in the sun. I glanced down at them and gave a wolfish grin.

There was a savage growl, and from the shadows leaped the biggest, baddest, most pissed-off looking tiger I'd ever seen. Hell, it's the only tiger I've ever seen, but you get the idea. Like an orange missile, it rocketed out from the undergrowth straight at me, claws outstretched to slice and dice.

It was at that moment that my complete surprise saved my life. I took a step backwards, tripping over my new feet, and fell over on my back. I saw the tiger streak over head where my face had been not a heartbeat before. There was a sudden, surprised yowling, followed by a mighty splash as it landed in the river and was promptly attacked by ferocious alligator. I could hear Daring give a whoop of triumph.

Turning my face from the grisly sight, I regained my footing and put up my dukes. Two more shapes sped out from the shadows, the puma and the cheetah. They came at me from the front, swiping with their claws and attempting to drive me back to the river. I stumbled backwards, clumsily dodging their blows. I felt one foot slide off the riverbank. Wetness on my fur. In the fury of desperation, I charged forward into the hail of tooth and claw, easily knocking the two cats aside like bowling pins in a seven-ten split.

I had a mere second to reflect on how that was possible. These things were the same size as I was on all fours, so the only way that made any sense was that I was obviously a lot denser than they were. This probably meant I had some protection against their attacks. Booyakasha!

The puma rolled with the impact and sprang right back up, charging at me before taking a flying leap over its fallen companion. Everything became a blur at that point. Reacting on pure instinct, I did the only thing that could come to mind.

I stepped into the attack and punched that furry son of a bitch in the face as hard as I could.

There was the distinct sound of bones breaking as my meaty ham of a fist stopped the puma mid-flight and sent it soaring into the undergrowth. Then, a sharp pain as the cheetah managed to dart in and sink its teeth into my leg. I could feel the whistling of wind in my ears as I grabbed it by the head and ripped the cat off, spinning around and flinging the light feline into a nearby tree with sickening speed, where it collided and slumped to the ground like a sack of bricks.

A scream of panic. I whirled around to find Daring pinned on her back by a bobcat, fending off a flurry of swipes with her forehooves, swinging up at the bobcat's face, giving as good as she was getting. But at this rate, she wouldn't last long.

Something took over in me, then. I felt a fire brew up in my chest, and it shot into my extremities like a bolt of lightning. I sank down onto all fours and sprinted towards her, the blood pounding in my ears so loudly that it was all I could hear. I opened my jaws and tackled the bobcat off her, slamming my teeth down on the back of its neck like a bear trap, before shaking it violently from side to side. The taste of blood flooded my system. I released my grip and it slumped to the forest floor, dead, its neck broken, the head hanging on by a few grisly strands.

I felt a sharp stinging agony on the back of my own neck, then. Howling in rage, I reached up and tore the source of the pain from its perch. I gazed at it stupidly for a moment. It was the fluffy kitten. He growled at me from the grip of my hands, sinking tiny white teeth into my thumb. After realizing this wasn't doing anything, he then ceased his efforts and tried to give me the big-eyed stare that only cute, baby animals are capable of making.

Into the river he went.

Panting with effort, I finally came out of my adrenaline rush. I looked around at the scene. A clearing had been flattened out by all the fighting, and Daring Do was sitting up, rubbing a cut she had on her neck. The broken form of the cheetah lay by the tree. The bobcat was by my feet, still bleeding out. On the edges of the clearing, the puma's black tail poked out from under a bush, unmoving.

Did I really do all that? I'd been in a few fights before, but nothing like this. This was different. Savage. Violent. Raw. And oddly satisfying. I'd never taken a life before at that time. But seeing the still forms of the attackers filled me up with a surprisingly small amount of guilt. It was them or us, right? Survival of the fittest and all that. Resolving to think about it on a later date, I thoughtfully horked a loogie to the side. It was crimson red with bobcat blood. I put a paw up to my face, and it came away a similar color. Jesus, I must be covered in the stuff!

Somewhat self-conscious now, I rinsed off in the river, careful not to get to close to the alligator, who by this time was making a gory mess of the tiger corpse. Weary, I took a seat on the forest floor next to Daring Do, who was busy digging around her pack for something, probably medical supplies.

"Well. That was fun," I sighed.

She looked up from her pack, eying me with curiosity. "You actually helped me."

Well, no shit I helped! I may be crude, sarcastic, and oftentimes downright unpleasant, but I am a gentleman. We have these little things called honor and chivalry. Both of these applied to this situation. Honor for upholding my promise, and chivalry for offering it to her in the first place. Call me old school if you will, because that's just how I roll.

I only nodded in reply. "I made a promise. It's considered good manners to keep those."

Daring Do smiled then. She was rather pretty when she did that. "You are a very odd Diamond Dog, uh..."

She was searching for me name. My name? I had a name, from when I was still human. But this was a new world, a new body. A new life. What I was before was nothing but an echo of what I could be now. An echo... I liked the sound of that.

I smiled back at her, careful not to bare my fangs. "You can call me Echo, miss."

"Excellent! Now I know who to kill for taking my beloved babies from me!"

That voice... it sounded like a cross between Dracula and Joesph Stalin. We both whipped around at the sound of this, and I found myself dazedly up into the face of this big, blue, monkey... cat... alien... thing. I immediately recognized him from the show. This was Daring Do's arch-nemesis, Ahuizotl. And he looked pissed.

I got up again, and wearily extended my claws, ready for a fight.

He eyed me disdainfully. "Please. You disgusting dogs have yet to learn your place. So, permit me to educate you."

And with that, a thin, whip-like tail, ending in what appeared to be a hand swept out from his side, knocking my legs out from under me. On my side now, tired and sore, I could only watch in horror as he lazily extended a massive, blue paw, sickle-like claws shining coldy in the sun...

...And slashed me right across the neck.

My vision suddenly went out of focus, and everything suddenly became muffled, as if I was falling asleep. I felt Auitzotl pick me up by my torn throat and fling me. I dreamily spun through the air, feeling myself collide with something light and feathery. The sensation of weightlessness was interrupted when I felt myself slow down, sinking into dense and wet and cold, before blackness overcame me once again.

(3) A New Den

The intoxicating aroma of freshly cooked burgers hit the roof of my mouth, and I salivated furiously as I watched the greasy cook slap together my order. I'd planned this for days, now. There was absolutely nothing that would keep me from enjoying this feast, and one fit for the gods at that!

"Order up."

Those words, oh, those heavenly words! Like the finest of symphonies delicately whispering their opening notes into my ears, I was all too aware of the fleeting experience that awaited me. Such beauty, such art, such pure, unrestrained uncomprehendable unimdomitable flavor! And it was all mine... mine, mine, mine! I clutched the treasure in the crumpled paper bag to my chest as I hurried to a secluded corner of the restaurant. I had already torn it open in my eagerness to consume the meal before my ass had hit the plastic upholstry of my chosen feeding ground, er, booth.

The burgers fell out of the bag in a glorious waterfall of cheap, greasy, crinkling wrapping. Like a jewler examining a priceless diamond, I negotiated through the pile with a practiced eye. Always start with the best one. Ah, and here it was! I delicately stuck a finger into the fold of the wrapping, slowly, oh so slowly, teasing it open, inch by delicious inch.

The sandwich gradually revealed itself to me, the pinnacle of modern cuisine. It was beautiful; a sloppy, oozing, greaseball that resembled a charred hockey puck more than an actual slab of meat, clumsily slammed in between two flat, shining buns of questionable freshness. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the double-bacon cheeseburger. Fast-food style.

My eyes closed in dreamy contentedness as I inhaled the scent. Oh, by Odin's magnificent chest hair, that smelled like seventeen different kinds of amazing. This was what wars were fought over. Men died for such perfection. Kingdoms had been lost, sons had been sacrificed, villages pillaged, gods cast aside for this single glorious sensation of rapture that was only comparable to-

"Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

I opened my eyes to find myself staring into the beady little peepers of a policeman. "What's the matter, officer?"

"You've been rubbing that burger on your nipples for the past ten minutes now. Plus, you're naked."

I glanced down in shock, and sure enough, there I was, sitting in a fast food joint in nothing but my birthday suit, with grease tracks all around my chest. The remains of my glorious feast were crumbled in a ruin in my hands, a casualty of my ravishing ecstasy.

"Are you all right, sir?"

I looked up at him again. His voice had changed, somehow. "Could you repeat that?"

"Are you all right?"

He sounded eerily familiar, but I couldn't place him.

"Are you all right?" he repeated. "You need to wake up now!"

What?

"Wake up."

Everything faded away from me, and I lunged forward to try and snatch the pile of food from the table before it fell into nothingness. The cop grabbed me by the throat and held me up in a superb one-handed choke-hold. It burned like the fire of a thousand suns, and I gagged and wheezed in his grip.

"WAKE UP!"

Then, I woke up.

My eyes flew open, and I whipped myself up into a sitting position, coughing and wheezing furiously as the pain in my throat intensified immensely. My paws, for they were no longer hands, went up to my neck and clutched it. Oh god. I felt something there that shouldn't be. Oh god what is it this isn't normal what's going on what's going on holy shit I'm gonna die-

BAM!

Something hard smacked into my face, snapping my head to the side. I felt... oddly calm, now. I turned around to face my attacker, one paw rubbing my face, the other still trying to figure out my neck.

Daring Do evenly met my gaze. Her muzzle was covered in blood, as were the tips of her wings. Where did all that blood come from? She hadn't been hurt in the fight - was that mine?! My memory came pouring back at that instant. The flash of claw in the sunlight, the grinning face of that blue bastard, Auihzotl. But, I could have sworn he ended me...

Daring Do must have read my expression of confusion correctly. "Do you feel all right, Echo?" The concern on her face was touching, yet surprising, considering how she'd first reacted to me.

I tried to speak, but the second I moved the tattered remains of my throat, the pain skyrocketed to unbelievable levels. I winced and fell back, clutching my throat piteously.

She was at my side in an instant, and gently pulled my massive paws away. "Easy. Your neck took one hay of a beating, there. I've only just stitched it back together, so try not to tear anything."

I leaned back again, stunned. She saved my life. I guess that made us even, then. But what had happened? Where was I now? My eyes roved around, taking in as much as I could. I was in a room that appeared to be made out of planks of a smooth bark, with bamboo poles making up a surprisingly tight flooring. A single window was carved into the wall above my head, letting in the soft glow of sunset. A gap in the paneling served as what I assumed to be a door, as a flap of cloth was hanging down from the top, like a curtain.

The fire in my neck was bearable now that I'd calmed down. I met Daring Do's gaze again, and swept my paw around in an encircling arc, pointing at her, then me, giving another shrug to indicate my question.

This mare was sharp as a tack, and read my gestures with frightening accuracy. "I don't know for sure, but when Auihzotl knocked us into the river, I think that snapped my wing back into place," she said. "I dislocated it in a crash a day ago. I managed to drag you out of the river, then. Auihzotl had left by this time, you see, he never stays to see if I'm dead or not." She chuckled at this. "That's probably why I keep coming back to make his day miserable. Anyway, once I got you out of the river, I saw your throat wide open. I used to work as a medic in college, so I know how to patch up a gash or two. Plus, being an adventurer like myself means that sooner or later you're going to get hurt. It pays to know how to take care of yourself.

"I used the needle from my compass, but I didn't have any string. I went in your pockets and sure enough, I found some really tough stuff. Thick, but tough. I stitched you up right there on the riverbank. It was touch and go for a while, and I wasn't able to save your vocal chords. Those are damaged beyond my skill. I'm sorry, Echo, but I don't think you'll ever be able to speak again."

I let that sink in for a moment. Something bothered me though. Why did I have string in my pockets? I gently ran a finger over my tender new wound, feeling it out. Sure enough, there was a thick cord holding my neck shut. Wait a minute... holy shit. The texture felt familiar, crushed in some places as if squeezed, but thick in others. I suddenly realized what she used.

Daring Do had saved my life with the needle from her compass... and my shoelaces.

Bwa-hahahahahahahahahaha!

I doubled over then in silent laughter, rocking back and forth in hysterics. I had absolutely no idea why this seemed so funny to me. Maybe it was the shock from my near death experience wearing off, or just my way of dealing with the fact that I was now a mute.

"What's so funny?" She asked, clearly interpreting my shaking for laughter, not a seizure.

I smiled and pointed at my neck, then mimed removing the string. I dangled the imaginary cord in front of her for a second, then acted out lacing it through an imaginary shoe on my foot.

"Those were... bootlaces?" She looked astonished.

I nodded again, a big loopy grin plastered to my face.

She looked down at my imaginary boots, then back to me. And promptly burst out laughing.

We laughed like that for a while, like a pair of kindergartners high on acid. Man, I remember kindergarten. Those guys know how to party.

Eventually, we calmed down enough so that I could manage to think again. Ok! Pop quiz! You wake up in a strange place, with a pony you barely know, a wound on your neck so gory that it makes the Joker's smile look friendly, and you're having a great time. Chose from the following.

A:) You're completely insane! Join the club, we've got jackets. Straight-jackets, that is.

B:) You're dead, and this is the afterlife. Congrats, you bastard, I'll be pissing on your grave.

C:) You're just damn lucky.

In my case, it was option C all the way. With this in mind, I gazed around my surroundings with new found reverence. After all, who knew when I'd be savagely mauled again? It's not like you can just kindly ask the nearest hibernating bear to beat the living tar out of you. No, you've got to do all this registration, and then there's the paperwork and...

... Sorry. A little delirious from the blood-loss, here.

I swept both of my arms around again, and patted the ground, fixing Daring with another questioning look.

This one took her a moment to figure out. "Where are we?"

I nodded slowly, careful of my neck.

"We're in my little piece of paradise, out in the middle of nowhere! Come on, I'll show you!" she said with a smirk. After she helped me stagger unsteadily to my feet, she led me through the covered archway on the opposite wall. After a small hallway, we came out into a lare, open room.

Despite the pain, my jaw dropped ten stories. Holy jack-in-the-box.

The room was completely circular, with the same bamboo flooring, woven rush mats scattered as haphazardly as the wicker furniture. There was what looked like part of a tree running up from the center of the room up into the tent-like ceiling, and from it were several small hangers, my backpack dangling from there alongside Daring's hat. Leaning up against the far side of the tree was a small stove, probably powered by some kind of magic. There were no walls aside from the hallway we just left. Instead, the room was built like a gazebo, with a loose netting strung up in between slender support beams along the outside. Through the netting, I could see the jungle spread out far underneath me in the setting sun.

Despite the situation, my inner child was completely stunned. This was, without a fucking doubt, the coolest treehouse I'd ever seen. This was like something out of a fantasy world! Oh, wait. Well, that explains a lot.

Daring laughed again at my expression and went across the room to jump into a hammock hanging from the central pillar and one of the support beams. "Well, what do you think?"

What did I think? At this moment, I wasn't even sure if I could think at all!

I nodded dumbly. Even if I could speak, that's all I could have done, anyway. I slowly strode across the room and pushed through the netting, stepping out onto a narrow porch that circled the entire structure. Off to my side, a set of stairs ran up to the roof of the treehouse, probably up to some kind of water collector to harvest falling rain. Far above, the arcing boughs of the tree blotted out the apex of the sky, but in the faint twilight I could see a few stars beginning to poke through the gaps in the leaves.

I gaped out at the jungle spread out several dozen stories below me. Damn, we were high up! As if to confirm this, Daring fluttered over from her hammock to join me at the railing. "Yep! This is the safest place in the jungle! The tree's too big to climb for the predators, so the only way up is to fly."

To fly up? It was then that I realized she must have hauled my furry ass all the way up from the riverbank. Now that's what I call dedication. We weren't even anymore. I owed her now, twofold.

I pointed at myself, and then at her wings, and made a flapping motion with my arms.

She half-groaned, half-smiled. "Echo, you are the heaviest thing I've ever carried! I swear if you hadn't saved my life back there I'd have left you on the ground. Honestly, what do you your mothers feed you Diamond Dogs?"

I shrugged.

It took her a moment to realize that I was completely serious. "Wait... what?"

I pointed at myself, then shrugged again. Translation: I have no fucking idea, sugartits. Your guess is as good as mine.

"Echo, where exactly are you from again?" There was a tinge of worry in her voice now.

I turned to look out on the jungle again. The sun was setting directly in front of me, so I could assume that was west. Did the sun even set in the west here? Bah. I'll find out later. I roughly estimated where the river was, and sure enough, I could see the indentation in the forest from here. Now, if I could just retrace my path from - ah! There it was!

Way off in the distance was the pyramid I'd woken up on. I waved her over and pointed at it vigorously.

She gave me that weird look again. Uh oh.

"You're from there? Are you sure?"

I nodded, with zest. Zesty motions are just so much more satisfying.

She frowned, and turned back into the treehouse. I followed her inside, my long arms reaching over her head to pull back the netting, but she didn't notice. Daring went over to a small table by a wicker chair, and opened up a small cabinet on it. She pulled out a large, dusty book that had several faded note cards sticking out of it. It smoothly opened up to the desired page as she plopped it onto a larger table by the tree, probably used for eating. In the last glimmer of twilight, she hurriedly read the page, pausing over a sketching of the pyramid. I looked over her shoulder to see, but at that moment I was completely dumbfounded by the strange, hieroglyphic lettering before me.

I couldn't read Equestrian.

Shit!

How am I supposed to read dirty magazines now?

And yes. I do read the articles. Old school; that's just how I roll.

Daring was mumbling something under her breath, and worriedly glanced out at the pyramid in the distance. The tension was palpable. This probably wasn't going to be good news.

In actuality, it wasn't good, or bad. But it was pretty damn serious.

She finally broke the silence. "Echo, that's called the Temple of Chaos. It's been sealed up since Discord was turned to stone... and apparently, if anything ever comes out of there... that means he's back."

Suddenly, I recalled a bit of conversation from the old man in the coffee shop.

"... Throw a little bit of chaos into the mix..."

Discord!

Discord was the one who sent me to Equestria! Discord had been on Earth... and more importantly, that crazy fuck kicked me in the face!

The sound of Daring Do slamming the book shut startled me out from a lovely daydream of unleashing an army of ferocious dancing lobsters on a certain draqonequus.

"Well, then! I guess I know where we're going next!" she proclaimed happily.

We? Well, why the hell not. As if I've anything better to do!

In true explorer fashion, Daring was chomping at the bit to get at the recently opened temple. I didn't blame her. I wanted to come too. I wanted answers, and the best place to find them was where I began.

"We'll set out in a few days, to give you some time to rest. That sound okay?"

I nodded, and then pointed to the book.

She looked shocked. "You want to read it?" Oh, gee, I'm guessing that Diamond Dogs aren't much for scholars.

I nodded again, then pointed to the symbols on the page and shrugged, before looking at her in what I hoped was my very own version of a puppy dog face.

"You want me to teach you how to read?"

Nod, nod, nod. Jesus, I feel like a bobble head.

She laughed at this, though it was with me, not at me. "You have got to be the weirdest Diamond Dog I've ever heard of. All right, fine. I'll teach you. But in return, I want your help excavating some ruins I can't get at after we go to the Temple of Chaos. With your natural abilities at digging, I can unearth some fresh treasures! That sound good?"

My tail wagged happily at this. Oddly, the prospect of shoveling pawfuls of dirt sounded very appealing.

Daring smiled again, the last vestiges of sunlight sparkling in her magenta eyes. "Good. Now, come on, let's get something to eat. I've got some gems lying around here from a recent raid on a crypt. They're tiny, so you should be able to eat them without hurting your throat."

And so ended my first day in Equestria.

What a long, strange trip it's been.

(4) An Old Dog Learns a New Trick

I woke up with the sun, contentedly slipping from the comforting blanket of unconsciousness as the first rays of light shone through my window. Daring had given me the room I'd woken up in before as my own for the duration of my stay. A thick, woven-rush mat now lay in the corner, serving as my bed. I don't know if it was my new body's preferences, but it really wasn't that bad of a place to crash.

I leaned up and stretched, yawning as I did. Big mistake. In my grogginess, I'd forgotten not to speak, and the flexing of my torn vocal chords to yawn sent a ribbon of sharp pain through my system. Any hope of dozing through the morning was now long gone, and I found myself anxious to begin the day.

Last night had been interesting, to say the least. I'd eaten my first meal in Equestria, a mix of small, seed-size sapphires and oatcakes, along with lots of water for my throat. Surprisingly, I could crush the gems between my teeth with ease, and I attributed this to the surprising jaw strength of the Diamond Dog. You'd think that the gems would taste like dirt, or like nothing, but no, the sapphires tasted like blueberries. Go figure. Maybe rubies taste like cherry or strawberry, and obsidian tasted like licorice? I didn't know, but I wanted to find out.

I rolled over and slowly got up, arcing my back like a cat, popping several vertebrae as I did. My sweatshirt was hanging up on the wall, so I took it down to examine it. It hadn't fared well, but it was still in good condition. I extended a claw and cut off the remaining sleeves, saving the cloth for later. The shirt I'd worn under it had been converted into a belt/rope, and I wore this around my hips, my switchblade tucked into it like a dagger.

I rolled my shoulders around in my newly modified clothing, intrigued by the feeling of cloth on my fur. Something wasn't right with it. I'd forgotten something. Ah! I pulled the hood up over my head. Just as I thought. I needed slits for my ears, so I could still hear when I had the hood up. Another round of custom tailoring provided such a comfort, and I decided to leave the hood up, my tufted ears poking out the top of the green cloth, occasionally swiveling to catch a bird call. I didn't know how to move them on my own yet, and I suspected that was because I'd never had movable ears before, so that meant I had to develop the muscle memory. The hood somewhat limited my peripheral vision, but I didn't care.

Sometimes, looking like a badass is worth the handicap.

I ducked over and crept through the small hallway into the gazebo. Something that struck me as interesting was that I was much bigger than Daring Do, who was a fully grown mare, and yet only came up to my stomach. As a result, some of the furniture in the treehouse was a little too small for me.

And don't get me started on the silverware. I had to learn how to hold utensils all over again. Daring seemed to be able to do so just fine, despite an obvious lack of thumbs. It seemed that pegasi were able to manipulate smaller objects using the feathers on the ends of their wings, which were surprisingly dexterous and worked almost as well as fingers. Think of having an extra pair of arms, and you can get what I mean.

The gazebo was still quiet, and Daring was asleep on her hammock, her face covered by her explorer's hat. The sound of none-too-feminine snoring brought a smug grin to my face. I decided to greet the day, so I took my backpack off of the hook on the tree and proceeded outside to the balcony. I ran a paw over the banister as I walked up the staircase running around the outside of the treehouse.

There was a fenced platform up here, roughly half the size of the one downstairs, that jutted out from the sloped roof. A rain barrel took up one corner, and a system of small pipes climbed from it up into the boughs of the tree. I took a seat on the worn planking, clumsily maneuvering my unfamiliar legs into a comfortable position. I let out a deep, contented breath of air as I took in the view, watching the sun rise. Up here, there was no roof; it was just you and the sky.

Inspired by the sheer immensity of the sight, I removed my backpack and began to dig through it until I'd gotten my psychology binder out, along with a pencil. Half of it was filled with detailed notes and diagrams about the human brain and how it worked (plus the usual doodles of dicks my friends put in there whenever I wasn't looking), but the other half was still blank paper. With a pencil held carefully between three of my large fingers, I began to study the list of words Daring had given me the night before.

Twilight Sparkle isn't the only one with a ravenous appetite for learning!

On Earth, I'd often been called lazy. This was usually true. I'll be the first to admit that I was a grade-A procrastinator.

Hell, if I ever worked for the Department of Defense, and someone launched a nuke at us, they'd call for a counter missile launch, but nothing would happen, because I'd probably be jerking off in the bathroom instead of being at my post.

But when I was interested with something, I would focus on it with so much intensity, it makes me think that there should be a new definition for the word "intensity." Applying this focus to my new world, I had already begun mastering the strange Equestrian alphabet.

Written Equestrian language is like a mix of ancient Egyptian hieroglyphics and Chinese characters. Sometimes a symbol is used to describe something, or sometimes it's a shape that has nothing to do with the subject it's talking about. But without a doubt, it was beautiful to write, each letter comes out like a work of art. When you write something in Equestrian, you're also drawing a picture, I guess.

Anyway, by this point, I guessed that I had the literacy rate of a pre-schooler. Not bad for one night's work, eh?

I'd been writing for a while now, and the sun was at that point in the sky where it began to make it look the bright blue of a summer's day. I folded my binder back up and put on top of my backpack, standing up again for another round of cracking my joints.

It then occurred to me that I had to piss like the dickens.

I didn't remember seeing a bathroom in the treehouse, so I figured Daring just went off the side. It seemed more like a guy-ish thing to do, but then again, Daring Do is probably one of the most badass ponies in Equestria. If she wants to piss like a dude, I could care less. Shrugging off my thoughts, I sauntered up to the edge and let loose.

Ahhhhhh...... Sweeeeeeet relief!

I don't know about you, but taking a piss off a really high up place just makes it so much better. However, the family of wild boars down below the tree would probably disagree with that.

Did I aim for them? You bet your grandmother's tits I did! I even got a headshot on the leader. The look on his face was so hysterical that I almost fell off the platform, I was shaking so hard from the laughter.

After relieving myself, I began examining my body again. I knew absolutely nothing about Diamond Dogs beside what Daring Do and the TV show had told me, and that wasn't much at all. I decided to write a list of what I knew and what I didn't to help me out with the process. I sat back down and opened up my binder to a fresh page, thoughtfully chewing on the end of my steel pen before I began.

I bit through the metal pen with about as much effort as lifting a finger. Oddly, the metal tasted pretty good, kind of like bread. The pen was now ruined, so I thew caution to the wind and tossed the whole thing in my open jaws. Crunchy. The ink kind of spoiled it, but in all honesty, it wasn't bad at all. After grinding it up into a fine pulp, I managed to swallow it without too much trouble. The fact that I'd just completely eaten a steel writing utensil caused me to break into silent laughter again, and I shook my head in slight disbelief as I got a pencil from my pack.

This time scratching my neck with the pencil instead of chewing it, I sat down and wrote my list, combining my knowledge of the show and Daring's comments.

DIET: Gemstones, unknown types of metal, and unknown types of vegetation. Possibly a meat eater as well, given the tooth shape, but definitely omnivorous if that is true.

STRUCTURE: Tall, lanky, and surprisingly dense. Canine cranium, although I seem to have a more wolf-like skull. Large, muscular forearms, probably used for digging. Extendable claws, up to several inches. Capable of traveling on two or four legs, but much faster on all four. Very strong; capable of halting a several hundred-pound puma mid-pounce and sending them backwards with a single punch. Jaws are extremely strong as well, and may even be able to crush diamond. Bones are probably made of a very dense material. Female structure (or existence) is unknown, as one has never been observed.

BEHAVIOR: D-Dogs seem to be heavily mistrusted by ponies (potential racism?). They have a fondness for treasures and are willing to enslave others to get it. They seem to live underground in colonies ruled by a small group or a single alpha male. Are capable of metalwork, as seen by the presence of armored guards, equipped with spears. The spear seems to be the D-Dog weapon of choice. Dog whistles and intense whining are a possible source of mind control. It appears that they are completely illiterate, either unable or unwilling to advance remains to be seen.

I set the pencil down and reviewed the list. Not much, but it was a start. Now that I'd compiled a decent background, I'd either have to finish learning to read, so I could read a book about them, or meet some Diamond Dogs in person. That last option probably wasn't going to work out so well. I strongly doubted that they'd be able to understand my silent communication as well as a pony.

"Morning!"

Turning around from my position, I saw Daring fly up from under the platform to land next to me. She wasn't wearing her shirt or her hat, and her resemblance to Rainbow Dash was almost frightening. Perhaps they were distantly related? I gave her a welcoming smile as she went over to the tree sticking out of the floor. Wait, why is she leaning forward like that? It almost looks like she's going to buck it... OH SHIT NO!

I swiftly stuffed my vulnerable binder inside my backpack as the intrepid mare slammed her hind legs into the thick tree. There was a few seconds delay, and then all the morning dew that had collected in the boughs overhead crashed down onto us like a flash flood.

I glared daggers at her once the downpour had subsided. She shrugged indifferently, water dripping off her soaked mane.

"What? A girl's gotta stay clean, and to be honest, you kind of smelled."

She then flicked out her wings and beat them downwards, taking off in a single stroke. The pegasus proceeded to do a corkscrewing dive over the edge, falling several stories, before pulling up and rising high above me, riding the thermals. Daring alighted onto the platform with a wicked grin, every inch of her perfectly dry.

"Awww, the doggy is all wet now!"

I proceeded to stand up and shake myself violently, spraying her with water and ruining the work of her aerial stunt. I pointed and silently laughed at her shocked expression. Ha!

Bitch please, don't start a gunfight unless you brought some extra ammunition!

"Yeah yeah yeah, laugh it up, furball," she grumbled.

Call me furball one more time and I'll toss you over the edge tied to an anvil.

She did another quick lap in the air, calling me down for breakfast as she flew. Showoff. Well, two can play at this game. I gave the edge an appraising glance and extended my claws. Would this work? Only one way to find out.

I sprinted forward and jumped high over the edge of the platform, but not far. The gaping maw of the jungle opened up beneath me, several hundred feet below. Quick as a rattlesnake, I whipped out my arms and sunk my claws into the very edge of the roof, swinging down and into the gazebo room from above, landing with a smooth little roll.

I stood up to find Daring staring at me from where she was sitting at the table, mouth wide open.

"Wha-how... that. Was... pretty cool," she stuttered lamely.

I took an eloquent bow, my nose brushing the bamboo flooring, and came up grinning. I was beginning to really like my new body.

We had more oatcakes for breakfast, and Daring Do whipped up some flapjacks on the small stove, adding some more of last night's leftover sapphires into mine. I showed her my progress on the Equestrian alphabet, and she was quite impressed, once again taken aback by how "strange of a diamond dog I was."

Eh, I don't blame her.

After breakfast, she showed me a map of the area, a real old-school looking treasure map that was rolled up like a scroll. She had marked the treehouse (or as she called it, "Paradise") with a large, red cross. There were small blue circles dotting the region, and she explained those as areas she'd already hit up for booty. There were larger green circles as well, sometimes alone, sometimes encircling the blue ones. Those were places where she had been, but couldn't get at the treasure. I assumed that I'd be going to many of these buried ruins later on, as part of our deal. In purple triangles, she'd identified the temples that she hadn't touched yet. There were surprisingly few of them, the Temple of Chaos included in this list.

The map told me quite a lot. It told me that, yes, the sun does set in the west, so the directions were the same. It also told me that Equestria was way, way, way bigger than I'd ever imagined. The area shown on her map covered several hundred square miles of this jungle, known simply as the Haysead Swamps, or The Great Southern Rainforest, to some. This jungle made up only half of Equestria's southern border, and from what I could tell from the map, that border alone was longer than the coast-to-coast distance of Australia, back on Earth.

I did a rough calculation, and put Equestria's actual size on something like the entire landmass of Africa, but that was on the small side of my guess.

This place was HUGE.

It then hit me that Equestria had a lot more to offer than just the familiar Ponyville and Canterlot area. In fact, I wasn't even sure I could get to Ponyville without a journey that would last several months, based on the level of technology I'd seen in the show. I scratched my chin thoughtfully, careful not to cut myself open on a claw. I came to a conclusion then, one that would come to define me.

I decided to travel Equestria on that day, to truly see what this land was like. What fantastical creatures, places, and ponies awaited me? I also decided that whatever happened, I would try to save Ponyville, the dream vacation of every brony in existence, for dead last.

The Elements of Harmony could wait. Once I pay back Daring Do, I'm going adventuring!

(5) Digging for Bones

The days at the treehouse passed by uncomfortably fast. During this time, Daring Do had been regularly administering a strange healing salve to the wound on my neck. When it came into contact with my skin, it made a faint hissing noise, which I soon found to be a good thing. The salve, you see, seemed to create scar tissue, and as a result my wound closed very quickly. After the third treatment with the stuff, the shoelace that had been keeping my throat together was finally removed. I now had an ugly, pale gash across my neck, but it was better than the makeshift stitching by far. I still had to be careful from using my vocal chords, though. They were still very sensitive, despite the best efforts of the intrepid explorer.

I'd asked her where she got the salve. Apparently there was a fantastic medical guru who had recently set up shop near Ponyville, and was a zebra, no less! Daring Do had been getting medical supplies from her for quite a while now.

I mentally added Zecora to the list of ponies I owed. God knows she deserves some recognition.

In the meantime, my progress with the Equestrian language proceeded at an almost unnatural pace, or at least it seemed that way to Daring. After one week, I'd learned how to write basic sentences and phrases, and I could now communicate again by writing in my psychology binder. My words were very simple, but I could get the point across. My host was genuinely surprised by my intelligence, and had begun asking me about myself. I answered to the best of my ability, but I couldn't really say much about it.

She knew that I'd mysteriously woken up on top of the Temple of Chaos. But the implications of such a thing made me think, and think hard.

"If something came out of there, that means Discord is back," she had stated grimly on the first day of my new life.

And if Discord was up and about, that meant I was at the beginning of Season 2. Interesting. This could probably mean that Equestria's timeframe is slightly behind Earth's. Regardless, I didn't worry about Discord too much. We all know what happens to him. The only thing I wasn't happy about was that once he gets petrified again, I won't be able to confront him. The distance from here to Ponyville, the site of his defeat, was simply too great for me to traverse in time.

Honestly, I couldn't make up my mind of whether I wanted to mount his balls over my fireplace or give him a hug. He'd sent me to a cartoon dimension, where I'd already almost died. Then again, I'd actually asked him to do it.

The major implication of Discord's eventual defeat was that I now had no known way to get back to Earth. Not that I wanted to, mind you, this place is just too mind-blowingly awesome to want to leave (and I didn't exactly have much going for me back home) but having the option to leave was always a nice thing to have.

Anyway, yesterday we were supposed to head out, but a large rainstorm kept us in the treehouse for the day. In hindsight, we probably should have seen that coming. This IS a rainforest after all. One would assume that it rains here from time to time. Plus, the nearest settlement was about a hundred miles away, much too far for their weather-team to travel to cover our particular section of turf.

Today is the big day. Once again, I rose early with the sun and did a last minute check on my gear, even though Daring and I had packed the supplies last night. A large coil of rope, a hammer and chisel, some stakes, food and water, and a first aid kit were now stuffed into my backpack. I had used some of the strips from my abandoned pants to strengthen my belt, as well. My knife was the only thing I carried with it, but it felt nice to have on. The length of shoelace that had saved my life was now loosely tied around my neck as a sentimental necklace. I adjusted my sleeveless sweatshirt, pulling the hood up over my head, a habit I'd developed. I don't know why, but it felt strangely satisfying on my ears to poke out from the slits I'd cut into it.

Daring Do had risen early as well, for the first time. We checked our gear together in the dawn for a while, until by some unseen signal we both rose and stood on the balcony.

"Ready? We've got a big job ahead of us," she said.

I nodded, then pulled out a small pad of paper and a pencil that I used to write on.

"How get down?" I wrote in my limited vocabulary.

"We fly."

We? I seriously hope she didn't have planned what I thought she did.

"Grab onto my back legs, tight as you can." Fuck. She did.

Daring leaped into the air, and hovered a few feet in front of me, extending her rear hooves. I gulped, glancing downwards. The forest canopy seemed to sickeningly pull farther away. I looked back up at her, pleading with my eyes.

"Don't be such a baby, Echo. I got you up here just fine! And besides, it's not like we're flying up, we can just glide. Plus, the thermals are really strong today, so we can cover a lot of distance to the Temple by flying."

"You crazy stupid," I hastily scrawled.

"And YOU are crazy chicken."

Chicken? ME? How dare she! I was not chicken! That's Scootaloo's thing! I grumpily stuffed the notepad into my backpack and gingerly grabbed hold of her rear hooves. I was probbably going to regre- WHOA HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT!

Daring pulled away from the side of the ledge, and I now dangled stupidly from her legs, my strong paws in a death grip around her hooves. We fell rapidly, the wind pushing my jowls back, until she leveled out, and began gently gliding on the warm, rising air coming from the jungle.

"See? That wasn't so bad," she scoffed as we soared high in the air.

Bitch, you even try and fold your wings, and I promise you that you'll be dead before you hit the ground.

I silently retched up my breakfast at the base of the pyramid, slightly shaking. Daring Do had actually managed to glide on the thermals all the way here. Flying with a heavy Diamond Dog hanging by a thread didn't seem to be much of a problem. No...

It was landing that was the problem.

A very painful one at that.

Daring Do stood at the end of the long furrow I'd ploughed into the ground on impact. She let out a low whistle, and complimented it. "Hay, Echo, you've got to land on your feet, not your face."

I glared at her from where I was hunched over, still in shock. "Never again."

I am not ashamed to admit that the crash had pretty much scared the shit out of me. Seriously. I almost lost bowel control there for a second. Things could have gotten messy.

"Yeah? Or what?" she laughed.

"Depends."

"On?"

I grinned, despite my condition.

"If you like bananas."

She didn't get the joke, but it at least made me happy. After I'd sufficiently recovered, we began climbing the long staircase to the top. Ah, stairs. My greatest enemy. All around us, I could see the trees pull away as we ascended higher and higher. It seemed like hours by the time we reached the top, and Daring was covered in a thin layer of sweat, while I was panting like crazy. I could not, for the life of me, control my tongue from hanging out of my mouth, such was the extent.

We had a quick snack from my pack, more oatcakes for her and small ruby for me. For your information, it tasted like watermelon. While we ate, Daring began investigating the stone container I'd originally woken up in. That was the only thing up here, besides that, the top was a perfectly flat square.

It was made out of a gray stone, and appeared to have Equestrian written on it. Daring read it out, clearly confused.

Oh, and thanks for the coffee.

Love,

Discord

You've got to admit, this guy might be a troll, but he's got quite a flair for what he does.

"Celestia's mane, this guy is random. Echo, you said you woke up in here, right?" Daring asked me, peering closely at the rhyme. "Are you the 'poor dog' it mentions?"

"Yes." I wasn't sure how much I could tell her. It's one thing to be an unusual member of a species, but another thing entirely to be an alien. I resolved to be as vague about this as possible, as I didn't want to drive her away. I was going to need her help again if I ever wanted to leave the Great Southern Rainforest on my journey of exploration.

Luckily, she didn't seem to interested in my role in this. "I wonder... every temple has a way to get in, but this stumps me. There's no door anywhere in sight."

I pointed to the inscription again.

She frowned, and looked around the ground, brushing away dust from the stones. "Yeah, but press down where? On what?"

Hmmm... I took another look at the coffin, walking around the outside. The surface, aside from the carvings, was completely smooth. Then, I had an idea. I peered into the coffin itself, where I'd lain in complete darkness. It had a flat bottom, the same material as outside. On closer examination, though, I found a hairline crack running around the edges, and from it came the faint smell of a cold, dark place.

And Bingo was his name-o...

I poked Daring on the shoulder from where she was busy eyeballing the stonework, then motioned her over to the coffin.

"Found something?"

I nodded, and pointed again at the inside of the container. "Press down."

She got a determined look in her eye, and hopped into the container. Rearing up high, she slammed her forehooves down into the ground with considerable force. There was a faint exhalation of dust from the crack, but nothing else. The explorer than repeated the process about a dozen times, each strike harder than the last, but no dice. She eventually fell against the side, exhausted.

I gently patted her on the shoulder, and pointed my thumb over my shoulder, indicating that she should get out.

"My turn."

Daring, too tired to protest, complied, flopping to the ground in a heap.

I stared hard at the coffin floor. It would take quite a bit of force to move this thing. This was probably a good time try and experiment with what I could do with this new body. I was pretty heavy, so maybe I could hit it from above.

I took a few steps backward, and ran toward the coffin, putting one foot on the edge and jumping up as high as I could. I twisted mid air, eyeing my target through narrowed eyes. With a slow spin, I cocked my fist back around and streaked toward the ground. Just before impact, I whipped my arm out as fast as I could and solidly punched the bottom, combining my considerable momentum along with my increased strength and density.

Two things happened in quick succession.

The first being that my meaty fist, traveling with the force of a small freight train, shattered the stone like glass, revealing a dark hole below.

The second thing was that I fell straight through it.

I tumbled through the air for at least eight seconds. I know that, because in that strange time when everything just slows down, I bothered to count them out.

One...

Two...

Three...

Four...

Five...

Six...

Seven...

Eight...

This is getting ridiculous, when am I going to-

WHAM!

-Fall.

In the blackness, I eventually came to a screeching halt, landing face up on some hard, flat surface. Ow. Major Ow. This hurt worse that that time I participated in the Running of the Bulls. Drunk. Bulls and booze. Shockingly, they don't mix well.

Wait, how the hell am I alive? I pondered this for a few seconds, before realizing that my body was probably a lot more durable than before. Still, it hurt like a bitch.

"ECHO! YOU ALL RIGHT?" came the faint yelling of Daring Do, peering down from a tiny speck of light far, far up above.

Right, because I could just yell back. Way to think that one through.

"JUST CLAP OR SOMETHING IF YOU CAN HEAR ME!"

That's what I'm talking about. I complied from my position on the ground, slamming my mitts together with enough force to send a ricocheting blast of sound straight to the top.

"OKAY! I'M GOING TO COME DOWN! CLAP ONCE IF I CAN FLY IN THERE, OR TWICE IF IT'S TOO DANGEROUS!"

A single burst of noise followed the original.

There was a pause, and then from the hole I'd punched in the ceiling, I could barely make out the figure of the explorer, clutching a torch in her mouth as she slowly descended. The light from the torch faintly touched the sloped walls higher up, but the farther down she got, the light receded as well. It seemed that the entire pyramid had been hollowed out. How it was even possible to build one like that, I had no clue. Then again, this was a temple dedicated to a god who made it rain chocolate milk that exploded. I should have seen this coming.

Daring Do slowly descended, her torchlight playing havoc with my eyes, which had already seemed to adjust to the darkness, and eventually touched down a few yards away. She quickly spotted me and helped me to my feet, where I unsteadily stood. Two major crash landings in a single day took a lot out of me.

She shivered slightly from her position next to me, eyeing the blackness warily. It stretched on in all directions with no end in sight. There was absolutely no sound whatsoever, apart from us. The compass dangling around her neck was spinning wildly. "This place gives me the creeps..."

"Scared?" I quickly scribbled.

She nodded. "Bravery is doing something even if you fear it. Stupidity is not being scared of anything. Makes you reckless, makes you slip up. And in this line of work, well..." She glanced around. The light from the torch seemed insignificant, a stain on the perfect blackness. "It pays if you don't slip up."

Wise words, indeed. I would have said I was afraid as well, but oddly, the dark environment seemed soothing to me. Perhaps this is because Diamond Dogs live underground? Regardless, I made the best of the situation, and began rummaging through my backpack, which I'd landed on in my fall.

Some of the food was crushed flat, but it was still edible. One of the metal water canteens had ruptured and was now useless, so I exercised my strange eating abilities and had myself a quick snack. It was tough and stringy, kind of like jerky, and again I was reminded of how much like bread that metal tasted. The rest of the gear was perfectly fine, although my pack, along with myself, was a little worse for wear.

"We move now," I wrote on the pad.

She looked around. "I agree. The sooner we get out of the open, the better. I don't like being surrounded by nothingness."

She gave me her torch, and we began to make our way forward. We had no particular direction in mind, and we couldn't even tell if we were walking in a straight line. But, progress is progress, even if it's not much.

We walked for an entire day.

Nothing changed.

At one point, I had decided to leave a line in the ground with my free paw, running a thin scratch over the stone floor. After we took a break, I followed it back a dozen yards, only to discover that the line suddenly vanished. If I'd been calm before, that shattered any amount of tranquility this place provided me. The darkness now looked unfriendly, even hostile. We needed to get out, or get through. But how?

The single pinprick of light that I'd created high above had never moved from its position, despite the amount of time we'd been traveling. Daytime should have ended a while ago, yet the tiny point never once faltered. Daring looked to be in no condition to fly me up to it, though, if anything she looked exhausted.

We called it quits after another few minutes of walking. For a while, we sat around a small campfire. If it weren't for the lack of trees and the eerie silence, I could have sworn we were out camping somewhere.

Aside from the crackling of the fire, it was as silent as a tomb.

Daring finally spoke up. "Why do I get the feeling I've bitten off more than I can chew on this one?"

I thought for a moment. "Greatness never won easy. Hope keep strong." My grammar was atrocious, but I'd only been using this language for a few days.

"I guess... but I've seen a lot of crazy stuff. This takes the cake completely. I can't help but think that we might be digging our own graves here. Maybe we should try and head out tomorrow?"

I shook my head. I wanted answers, and this place was the best place to look, if any. With Discord himself soon to be defeated, my only option to learn more about my position is the place of his worship. But... Something she said had sounded oddly stirring.

Digging our own graves... hmmm....

I absentmindedly scratched at the floor with a claw, leaving a large score. My claws could probably cut through this stuff easily. Wait a minute.

I stood up, and looked around eagerly. I had another idea. Daring watched my movements with interest, clearly noticing the new spring in my step.

"What's up, Echo? You found something?"

I grinned almost manically.

"Diggy diggy hole."

Thank you, internet!

I extended my claws and sank a paw into the ground. Sure enough, I literally ripped out a chunk of rock like it was melting snow. Daring's eyes widened in realization. Smart girl.

"You dig, I'll clear it away."

And with that, I began digging, frantically tearing out paw-fulls of stone and setting them aside for the mare to kick away. I was hauling up pieces of rock and rubble that would have filled an entire wheelbarrow every time I struck the ground. I think it's safe to say that I've discovered one of the Diamond Dog's unique talents.

I dug straight down, a narrow, well-like shaft that I rapidly had to widen so that I could move around. It got to the point where I'd dug so deep that my head was soon below the surface, despite my height. And still I went on. I didn't tire, no, the action of digging actually seemed to give me more energy, as if I was tearing power from the earth itself with every swipe of my paws. Debris soon fell in a shower outside the pit, and Daring had all but abandoned moving the debris, unable to keep up with my pace, which had exponentially increased. I don't know how long I kept it up, but once I'd dug about twelve feet down, and cleared a hole that was at least my arm-span in radius, I hit the bottom.

And that's when I found it.

Smiling, I brushed some rubble off the bottom of the pit, clearing away my prize. Daring fluttered down into the pit to see what I'd stopped flinging boulders up for.

We stared at it dumbly together for a while. "Is that what I think it is?" she finally said.

I nodded.

There, lying flat on the ground, was a simple wooden door.

I gently grabbed the doorknob and opened it up. Just as I thought. I honestly should have seen this coming from a place of chaotic worship.

Leading down into further darkness, was a set of stairs.

"I get gear. We go down."

After five minutes of packing up, we once again found ourselves descending into the darkness. Hopefully, we wouldn't descend into madness, either.

...Sadly, that was exactly what happened.

(6) The Lone Wolf

The staircase, unlike the chamber above, was quite small, only descending about three stories. At the bottom, reflected by my torchlight, was a solid, ornamental door, inscribed with intricate carvings inlaid with gold. A large image of Discord, stunningly crafted, took up the center, and along the borders were a great multitude of ponies, who seemed to be bowing to him in worship.

Daring wisely suggested that we take a breather before continuing on. We'd been traveling for quite some time now, and with the next area of the temple clearly within reach, we decided to hunker down for the night on the staircase, and press onward after some shuteye.

She curled up on the ground a few steps higher than I was, and soon fell asleep, tucking her head into her wings like a bird. I didn't feel tired at the time, so I decided to work on the Equestrian language some more. I dug into my backpack, and retrieved my binder, which by this time had been filled to three-quarters full. Stuffing my pack behind me, I leaned up against the wall and began to work in the faint torchlight.

As I continued my self-education, I couldn't help but think about the history of this place. One morning, I'd found her pouring over some sketches of the temple, a large amount of notes laying nearby. I tried to make sense of it, but at the time I was barely able to read individual words, let alone Daring's atrocious chicken-scratch wing-writing. And yes, she held her writing utensil with the ending feathers of her wing, though sometimes switched to her mouth. She'd noticed my curiosity and filled me in on everything she knew about the site of our current adventure.

Long, long ago, Discord used to rule Equestria. Or, actually, he didn't really rule it, he was just the absolute authority in the land when the mood struck him. He would spend most of his free time simply frolicking about, pranking ponies left and right. Chaos was king, and while Discord never did any real harm to his subjects outside of the occasional lightning bolt or pie to the face, they were very unhappy. Discord was never one for modesty, and constantly flaunted his power, raining prosperity on the land one day, and the next, he'd turn the oceans into hot sauce.

Basically, it was like someone had given a six-year-old the keys to the Death Star and said, "Have fun!"

Discord was not a god. That much I knew for sure. From what I knew about them, a god would know all, and be able to do all. Discord was not all knowing, nor was he all powerful. If he was either of those things, then he'd never have been defeated by Celestia and Luna, and later by the Bearers of the Elements of Harmony. However, the ponies who were loyal to him (there were a decent number of them) would worship him as a deity in places much like the Temple of Chaos. Once, there had been many temples like this, scattered across Equestria, but after his defeat, most of his shrines were destroyed. It seemed that this one had escaped the wrath of the Princesses, probbably due to its extreme distance from, well, anything.

Daring Do, the undisputed master of adventuring, had been trying to crack this place open for years. She didn't know what was inside, hell, nopony knew what was inside. The secrets of Discord's worship had been struck down along with the draconequus himself. That was what made this place so alluring to her, I suspected. Most of the time, she had a general idea of what she'd find in the ruins she so frequently explored. A magical idol, perhaps, or a treasure room full of priceless scrolls.

But here? No. Neither of us knew what to expect. Riches? Knowledge? Frankly, I'm not sure it mattered to either of us. Daring was always chomping at the bit for something like this, a true dive into the unknown, exactly what explorers do. That was her special talent, going where nopony had gone before, and it was as obvious as the mark on her ass. Me? Well, I wanted answers. Why was I here? Why was Discord on Earth? Aside from that, I really only wanted to do this because it was here to do.

In short, why the hell not? It's not like I had anything better to do.

I think Discord must have put a little too much chaotic energy into that kick, because I was beginning to sound like him.

There was no night or day down here, and I only had the light of the torch to see by. After about an hour of work, I took some firewood out from Daring's saddlebags and made a small campfire to keep the light going. Then, I slept.

"Hey! Wake up, lazy. It's time to get this thing open."

I woke to the feeling of a hoof prodding me in the stomach. I groaned and stood up, stretching and cracking my joints, another habit I'd developed. You see, the larger the joint you crack, the louder the noise it makes. My knuckles were now the size of my knees, and made incredibly satisfying pops about as loud as a capgun.

Daring stood by the door, examining it closely.

"It should swing open just fine, but it'll take a bit of effort. Come here and push with me."

I strolled over and leaned my shoulder into the door, and pushed off the stairs as best as I could. Daring added in, her head pressed hard into the surface while her wings pumped up and down, creating a strong draft that almost blew out the torch. After a considerable amount of groaning and heaving, the door slowly inched open, swinging upwards on a hinge attached to the ceiling, like a hatch.

I pushed it up and held it high, while she gathered our supplies and extinguished the campfire. You'd think that holding a heavy door above your head would be tiresome, but my strong arms took the burden well. After she came through, I let the door go, and it swung back into place with a tremendous crash.

"Echo. This is it."

Those words, shattering the tomb-like silence of this place, made my ears perk up with interest, as I surveyed the room we were in now. From the torchlight, I could see a long walkway extending into the center of a vast, vaulted chamber, where it met with a stepped circular platform. A cylindrical capsule lay on a table on the platform's summit, but nothing else. The darkness from the first room was here was well, although we could faintly see the walls and the ceiling. But down?

I gently pried a splinter off of the torch and lit the end, before dropping it off the walkway. We watched as the bright speck silently plummeted through the blackness for a long, long time. We didn't move, and we didn't breathe. Our eyes were riveted to the rapidly fading glimmer with a frightening intensity.

And then, for a split second, something moved over the light.

Something big.

Daring Do gasped. "By Celestia's mane..."

We weren't alone.

I remembered a saying from Earth. I don't know where it's from, but it applied to the situation perfectly.

I suddenly experienced the unbidden feeling of my hackles rising, until they were so stiff that they actually pushed my backpack off of my back a little. My fur fluffed out, too, and felt a bit like goosebumps.

I turned to Daring. "Move fast. This place was sealed for a reason."

She nodded silently, the feathers on her wings puffed out, not unlike my fur. Tearing her gaze from the yawning void, she began to trot down the walkway to the platform. Her hooves made a weird echoing throughout the chamber, while I padded softly behind, warily glancing around.

We climbed up the platform's circular steps and beheld the strange item on the altar. It was made of dark stone, just like everything else, but it was very smooth, and there were faint circles inscribed onto it. It looked organic, almost like a giant, three-foot tall egg. Daring gently ran a wingtip over the surface, and frowned.

"It's warm! Echo, you've gotta feel this."

I gingerly extended a paw and pressed my palm onto the stone. Sure enough, it was warm, and it almost felt like the heat was pulsing a little. I reached my paw back and delicately poked it with a claw. It made a strange, haunting note, like running your finger along the edge of a wine glass. We exchanged a glance. Whatever it was, this was what we came for, and it was coming back with us.

I reached out again and wrapped it in my paws, picking it up with surprising ease. It almost felt hollow, and yet, it seemed to move around as if there was something inside it. I twisted it around in my paws, examining it from every angle. Were those words on the botto-

"Ah, if it isn't Miss Daring Do and her flea-bitten mongrel. I'd say it's a pleasure to see you two again, but it really, really isn't."

The words came from behind, startling me so badly that my claws extended, sinking into the orb with an almost frightening ease. A faint, purple-pink glow began to shine from where my claws had punctured it, and I felt it begin to grow hot on my skin. I glanced behind me, but kept facing the altar, now much more frightened than before.

Ahuizotl stood on the walkway, his large, blue figure flickering weirdly in the torchlight.

"What do you want?" Daring spat at him, although quietly, unwilling to break the uneasy stillness of the chamber.

"Why, the exact same thing you do! Fame, fortune, and to have a good time while acquiring it, of course. Oh, and that interesting little treasure your pet seems to have picked up. Yes, I think that will do nicely." He grinned, revealing row after row of serrated, shark-like teeth. "And if you could die in the process, that would just make my day."

Fuckberries! He must have been following us the entire time, just waiting for us to get to the end so he could snatch away our prize! Speaking of which, the object in my grip began to heat up even more, the light spilling from the hairline cracks that were now forming had increased in intensity. I felt it begin to shake a little. Still, I kept my back turned to Ahuizotl. Whatever this thing was, it was my ace in the hole, and he didn't know it was doing this.

Daring Do responded by reaching into her saddlebags to withdraw a long, thick whip, which she cracked expertly over her head while gripping it tightly in her teeth. The loud snap sounded more like the sonic boom of a jet in the weird acoustics of this chamber.

Ahuizotl hissed at her, like a cat, before letting his claws slide out, and charged up the walkway.

Daring flicked her whip down at him, before taking off with a powerful pump of her wings. She soared through the air in silent, graceful flight, circling her foe on the walkway. Ahuizotl, fixated on her, warily held himself at the ready where he stood, tensed to leap away at a second's notice.

The orb got hotter, brighter, and more energetic. I crouched by the altar, hiding it from view. My claws, which I'd withdrawn from the orb, were now glowing as well, as if covered in neon paint at a rave party.

Then, she struck. A sudden burst of speed, followed by the faint whistling of the whip before it snapped again, this time on Ahuzotl's backside, despite his best efforts at evading. He screeched in pain and slashed out at her, barely missing a passing foreleg. His cry bounced off the walls, reverberating in my ears and making me lay them flat against my head.

They circled each other again, before Daring struck a second time, buzzing her foe like a dive-bomber. He ducked and rolled to the side, almost falling off the walkway, his tail lashing in anger.

A third strike soon followed, and this time, both combatants scored a hit, Daring's whip striking across the face and one of Ahuzotl's claws tracing an almost delicate slice on her side, just under the wing. They continued to fight like this, a charge, a sudden exchange of blows, and then a quick retreat. This was suicide, I realized. Daring simply didn't have anything able to take him out in one blow, and eventually she would tire, forcing her to land and allowing him to bring his superior size into play. I was the only one who could even fight him, but even then I doubted I'd be able to do much, given our last encounter.

Or could I? The object in my hands seemed about ready to explode. Just maybe...

Daring gave out a shriek as Ahuizotl scored another hit, this one on the leading edge of her wing, and deep, too. Dark blood dripped off her and into the abyss as she flew, although somewhat weaker now.

I let out a high pitched, two tone whistle that I usually saved for getting people's attention, about the equivalent of yelling, "Hey, dumbass, over here!" It got his attention.

The beast looked over at me, and I figured he'd almost forgotten I was here.

I put the orb on the altar and turned around, pencil and paper in paw. "Guess my favorite ballet."

He stopped, stunned. The look on his face was about as surprised as if I'd suddenly turned into a tiny masked wrestler and drop-kicked his grandmother off a cliff. "Excuse me?"

"THE NUTCRACKER!"

And with that, I whipped around, picking up the pulsing object, and hurled it at him as hard as I could.

He stared stupidly at it as it flew, before it impacted right on his crotch...

...And promptly exploded in a brilliant purple fireball, the concussion from the blast knocking Daring out of the air and onto the platform, where she came to a rest at my paws.

Ahuizotl flew back to roll to a stop several yards away, but I didn't give him the chance to recover. Now free of my burden, I tore down the walkway and sank my glowing claws deep into him, before grunting as I lifted his smoking figure high over my head.

Give my best to Emperor Palpatine, bitch.

I whipped my arms downwards as fast as I could, and flung him into the void. He let out a sickening wail as he fell, spinning slowly through the blackness before fading from view. His cry pierced the silence of the room, and he even bothered to suck in another breath to continue his scream for another few seconds-

-Before it suddenly ended.

Daring Do slowly regained her footing, wincing as she tried moving her wing around. It was bleeding heavily, but she shrugged off my advances with the first aid kit, instead gawking at the walkway.

"What in Equestria is that?" she simply whispered, her jaw almost completely slack.

I followed her gaze, and soon my jaw joined hers.

A figure emerged from the smoke left by the explosion. It was about Daring's height, wry and almost snakelike. It stood on two legs, one that seemed to be from an ostrich, the other from a lion. A kangaroo tail extend far behind it. The body was thin and scales ran up the front, while golden-brown feathers flowed down the back. It had four arms, two of which looked like they were from a very large lobster, the other two from a bear, although with pure white fur. It had a purple , scaled head that faintly reminded me of one of those Chinese dragons, and it had a magnificent, curled mustache that was streaked with green and pink and blue.

It sauntered up to us and crossed both pairs of arms, before rolling its neck around, popping the vertebrae.

"Ugh. Two thousand years will give you such a crink in the neck! Alright, so which one of you set me loose?"

We were still for a moment, and then I sheepishly pointed a glowing claw at myself.

"Well, what have we here! Aren't you an interesting specimen," it said, as it strutted around me, giving me an appraising look with two eyes were surprisingly matching, a deep, regal magenta. "So, I assume you knew what you were doing when you set me loose?"

I shook my head, as did Daring.

"Ah, well then, I suppose I'd better introduce myself, then. Terrible manners to not do that sort of thing, you know." He snapped his fingers, and a business card popped into existence, and I caught it between thumb and forefinger. "My name is Disarray, and you, my interesting furry friend, have just won this fabulous prize!"

He spun backwards and spread his arms as an old-timey flashing billboard suddenly lit up above him.

What the hell is this?

"You see, I got into a bit of a fight with my old man, and he put me into that dreadful egg thing for a time out. Two thousand years later, here I am! He leaves me in there! So, I vowed to really stick it to him by granting my rescuer a few requests. Of course, there are a few rules. No asking me for things back to life. I can actually do that, but it's really nasty, and zombies are never a good thing to have on one's platter. Second, I'm not a matchmaker, so don't bother wishing for love. Third, no trying to trick me into giving you a freebie. I'm a lot smarter than you think. Fourth, no making compound favors. You can't ask for two things at the same time. Well then, let's hear it!"

Daring and I exchanged a glance. "This is up to you, Echo. I've already got everything I could want."

I thought for while, Disarray and Daring both eagerly peering at me. What did I want? I could have pretty much anything my twisted little mind could think of, and this guy seemed quite capable to provide me with just that.

A sudden, booming roar that shook dust from the ceiling, echoing up from the depths below, suddenly reorganized my priorities. We had to get out of here. NOW. I whipped out my pencil and paper and hastily scribbled down my demand.

"Take us to entrance to the temple."

He simply looked at it, before taking the paper and crumpling it up and tossing it over the edge. He sighed. "You have to say what you want, fuzzy."

Daring Do gave the abyss a fearful glance. "He can't speak!"

"Hah! What's a matter, cat got your tongue?"

"No, I mean he actually can't speak!"

He looked at me again, and I pointed to the fresh scar on my neck. His eyes widened suddenly in what seemed to be fear. "Oh, my. That isn't good. I can't fix damage like that... tell you what, if I give you a new way to talk, will you count that as my second favor?"

I nodded vigorously. The sound of the roaring was beginning to draw closer. The patchwork creature adopted some kind of kung-fu pose and gestured forward with his pair of lobster claws, which began to glow purple-pink.

"Shazam!" he cried. The lights flashed. I blinked stupidly for a few seconds and tried to say something. I was met only with pain as the shreds of my vocal chords protested mightily. I glared at him.

Disarray shrugged. "What? I never said I'd give your voice back. I just gave you a new way to talk. Try it out!" He lifted up my paws and tapped the center of my palms. The claws shot out, now glowing much more brightly than before. He moved my hands up and down, and the claws left a shining contrail behind them. I was mesmerized. It was like I was writing in the air.

I pulled away and quickly repeated my demand, and watched in awe as the words hung there in space for a while, their light tinging my vision with its luminescence.

There was a snapping sound, and suddenly we were standing on the top of the temple, the night sky stretched out before us in a glorious ceiling of stars. The moon hung low in the sky, merely a hairline crescent. The jungle was still as vibrant as ever, even at night, and the fresh barrage of sound after the eerie quiet of the temple felt like music to my ears.

Daring looked around in disbelief, clearly as surprised as I was. "What the hay! You said he had to talk to get that to work!"

Disarray nodded. "He did talk. You see, explorer, the pup's claws were already covered in my essence. I added little more, and, well, you saw the result. The act of putting words in the air itself is speaking, or rather this is the highest form of it. I did exactly as I said I would do, no more, no less. Oh and, by the way, you've got one favor left. So you can just..." A pair of sunglasses suddenly appeared over his face. "...Deal with it."

The mare sank to the ground in silence. I noticed she was still bleeding, so I finally began applying some of her healing salve to the wound. She didn't resist.

"So, what'll it be? Power? Women? A bouncy house? Please say a bouncy house, those things are so much fun."

I turned from Daring to see him lounging on the edge of the container I'd woken up in, nonchalantly clacking his lobster claws. He seemed very smug at that moment.

"Anything?" I wrote in the air. My god, this was entrancing to look at.

He picked his teeth with one of his bear paws. "Outside from what I've already restricted. Were you even listening?"

I gave him a savage grin. Oh, I was listening, all right. He fell for the biggest loophole in the book.

"I want three more favors."

He laughed heartily at this, and almost fell back down into the temple from his perch on the lip. "Ha! That's rich, you very well know that that's completely against..." He paused and frowned, suddenly worried. "Oh, well played, well played indeed, sir. You're about as devious as my old man, let me tell you that. Fine, but from now on, no more of that. Now, speak your heart's desire."

I cracked my knuckles and began to write, my words carving through the night air in delicate ribbons of light, hovering in a spectacular light show.

Disarray cooly read my demands.

"It's not a bouncy house, but I guess it will do. Echo, first of all, I'd like to say that you are without a doubt the strangest creature I've ever come across. You don't act, think, speak, or even smell like other diamond dogs. The fact that you can even read and write is astounding enough, but looking out for Daring as well? You truly are interesting. So interesting, that I think I'll be watching you from now on.

"Now then. The first item on the list. You want to know why my father sent you here?"

His FATHER? Discord was his dad? Now that I'd not seen coming. But who was his mother..?

Disarray's soft pink eyes glimmered in the moonlight. The snow white fur on his second pair of arms had an almost pallid sheen to them. His mustache, streaked pink, blue and green, seemed to shift a little, although there was no wind.

Then, it hit me harder that a hangover after New Year's.

Holy shit.

There was only one pony in Equestria who had something like that. That could only mean...

...This guy was a prince.

(7) Welcome to the Pack

"...Oh, really. That isn't necessary, you know. I gave up such formalities long ago. Although, it is rather flattering. I know I'm handsome, but please, no need to grovel."

Disarray's somewhat annoyed voice broke through my train of thought from the position on the ground. In the wake of my realization, I had come to the conclusion that not only was I in the presence of the offspring of a being who could move the freaking sun, but also the one who could make chocolate milk explode. That kind of power, regardless of whoever is wielding it, should be respected. And so, unable to come up with an adequate response, I had simply done the first thing that had come to mind.

I had fallen to one knee and respectfully bowed.

"Come now, don't jump to conclusions." I felt his lobster claws grab me under my arms and lift me back to my feet. "I see that you recognize me for who I am, but you know not of how I came to be."

Still wary of the pint-sized draconequus (or was he half alicorn?), I remained tense.

He gave me an appraising look and scowled, which actually looked quite humorous on his dragon face. "Relax, silly dog. I'm not going to turn you into a pinata, and I'm not going to try and take over Equestria."

I was stunned. "But you are Discord's-"

"-son?" he interrupted. "Aye, I am. I am also Celestia's as well. Doesn't mean I'm like either of them. In fact, you are about in as much danger standing in front of me as you are being protected by an entire platoon of Royal Guards. I cannot possibly emphasize this."

Apparently, the apple does fall far from the tree. Huh. But something was bothering me.

"What will you do now that you are free? Will you go to Celestia? Discord?"

He made a sound that was not quite laughter. "What, and have a lovely little old family reunion? Maybe I'll shed a single tear as we all embrace and the sun sets gloriously behind us. Hah! Please. My mother all but disowned me long ago, and my father never stuck around long enough for me to grow very attached."

Daring Do, who had been in a shocked silence this whole time, spoke up, her eyes wide with something that was in-between extreme interest and pity. "What happened?" I frowned as I observed her condition. She was lying on her stomach, with her damaged wing extended out to the side. The gash it sported looked particularly deep, and despite my efforts, blood was still seeping out.

"Exactly what you think would happen. Celestia, in all of her infinite wisdom, fell in love with the avatar of chaos. Order and chaos, balancing eachother out... and from that unique balance that only true love can bring: pop goes the weasel!" he said with a wink. "I'm the weasel, by the way. But, the very things that my mother fell for, Discord's unpredictability, his imagination, the dashing good looks that I've so obviously inherited, eventually caused them to fall apart.

"You can't really blame him, I suppose. One day, he was just... gone. Poof! Arrevederci. It makes sense, if you think about it. He is chaos personified. Trying to tie him down is like trying to stop the tides." He gave a soft chuckle. "Yes, with enough magic, you can do it, but that upsets the natural order of things. Heh. Even in the wilds of nature, there is order. And in order, there is chaos. Can't have one without the other.

"I never forgave him for doing that, though. And neither did she. She grew depressed, and whenever she looked at me, even more so. So eventually, I left. Just like the old man. But I had a reason, unlike him. I couldn't bear to see her like that. It was maddening. But we had quite the argument before I left. Words were said that probably should not have been, and in the wake of it, my title and crown were forfeited, tossed aside in my desperation to leave. This was for the best, I suppose. Regardless, it probably hurt her even more, but I didn't have a choice. But, in the meantime, Dad got it into his thick skull that he should be ruler of Equestria. While I no longer stood for order alongside my mother as a prince, I was not supportive of chaos either, and had no desire to see the world come to that."

"And you confronted him." Damn, this kid had cajones. I knew all too well about what he was talking about, too. My own parents had split when I was young, although I'd never reconciled with my Pop about it. With bitter irony, I realized that now I'd never get the chance.

"Aye. I tried to at least. He was shocked, you see, that I didn't want to follow in his footsteps and rule Equestria by his side. And so, after a struggle, he decided that I was no longer his son, and sealed me away. Ironically, this was the action that caused Celestia and Luna to finally take him down. However, once Discord was petrified by the Elements, I was left in my prison, all but forgotten. Discord had been the only one who knew where I'd gone. Celestia simply assumed that I'd run away, and despite her best efforts, never found me.

"And so, here I stand before you. The castaway offspring of the embodiments of order and chaos, who forsook his crown and his family to try and find his own way. And thanks to you, dog, I finally get the chance to do that."

I shrugged, still digesting the information. "Now what?" I pressed the issue. "A lot has changed in the time you've been gone. Were you aware of that?"

Daring Do nodded sluggishly. Her eyes were half-lidded, although her ears were still pricked up in interest. She seemed to be taking all of this this surprisingly well, but then again, she was made of strong stuff. She put her life on the line almost on a daily basis and made a living off it, for fuck's sake. "Celestia overthrew Discord, and turned him to stone. Well, he was turned to stone, but now he's back."

Disarray gave a hearty laugh. "Mom always was the better fighter. She used to be called the Dragonslayer, you know, back when Equestria was still young and neither her or her sister were royalty. If she stopped him once, he'll be going right back in. And I don't think you have to worry about me adjusting to a new world. While I was physically trapped, my essence was free to roam. I've been watching the world go by, so to speak. The Elements of Harmony are back, and Nightmare Moon was struck down." He smirked. "It also seems that Auntie Luna and I have a lot in common now. I hope I get to meet her again soon. She was always so nice to me."

The image of Celestia facing down a monstrous dragon and yelling "FUS RO DAH!" almost made me double over in laughter. There was a lot I didn't know about either of the sisters, apparently. But still... his accuracy was almost chilling. He might as well have been watching the show. Did that make him a brony?

"Now, Echo, I believe I still owe you an explanation for my father's actions. And it seems your friend here needs some medical attention. Why don't we go somewhere a little more comfortable? Where is it that you two reside?"

Daring lifted up a shaky hoof to the east. On the moonlit horizon, the tallest tree in the area loomed over the surrounding canopy, and I could barely make out the bulge of her treehouse, clinging to the giant like a barnacle on the skin of a great whale.

"Excellent! Allons-y!" Before I could even register that he'd just quoted the Doctor, he clacked his lobster claws together twice. There was a flash of light, and we were suddenly in the treehouse gazebo.

I staggered up against one of the support columns. I hadn't noticed this before, but teleportation seems to make you very nauseous. Daring looked a bit green in the wings as well, though that might have been more from the blood loss. I removed my pack and applied another dosage of that healing salve, and watched as the torn flesh on her wing began to bubble and knit itself together. The wound was far from healed, though, and blood still dripped onto her tan feathers. I applied some gauze as tight as I could. We were going to have to get that fixed, and soon.

She rose unsteadily to her hooves and crossed the room to her hammock. "I'm going to just rest for a bit. You guys go and do... whatever it was you asked him about." The explorer collapsed into the hanging resting place and was unconscious before she was done falling.

Disarray, on the other paw, was examining the small stove leaning against the tree that made up the room's central pillar. He looked up once he noticed I was watching him, and coughed, seemingly embarrassed.

"Ahem. I may have watched technology progress, but it's still an entirely different thing to be able to use it."

I rolled my eyes and gestured outside, to the balcony. "Shall we? My friend needs her sleep."

He looked genuinely surprised at this. "Your friend? Hay, I thought you were screwing each other, the way you've been so nice."

I gave him a double dosage of upraised middle fingers. Which, by the way, looks a hell of a lot more impressive when you've got glowing claws extending several inches from them. The claws themselves returned to their normal color when I sheathed them, only altering when I let them loose.

But he had admittedly begun a train of thought in my mind that had been until this time stuck at the station. I knew very little about what was acceptable in Equestria in terms of relationships. Due to all of my time being spent in near isolation, I'd yet to find out whether or not such parings even existed. There was always that whole "Spike and Rarity" thing to use as an example of this, however, Spike was about the equivalent of a six year old, and I doubted that Rarity wanted to be labeled as a pedophile.

Disarray laughed my reaction, and strolled amiably through the netting to the balcony. I soon joined him, and together we looked down over the jungle. The night sky pulsed with lights, radiant enough to coat the scene with a soft, silver light. The sheer beauty of it was breathtaking, yet extremely sobering. It was the sort of thing that gave you goosebumps from the simple majesty it's existence.

I couldn't help but feel very, very small at that moment.

"Auntie Luna is quite the artist, isn't she?" said Disarray, who seemed to be just as taken with the sight as I was. "Under her care, every night seems better than the last. I think Mom was always a little jealous of her for that, because while most ponies spent their time in the day, it was still ugly and harsh in comparison."

"I've always liked the night more than the day. I wish my kind were nocturnal."

"Which ones? The Diamond Dogs, or humans?"

WHAT DID HE JUST SAY!?

I turned to him, completely stunned. "You know?"

He gave a small cough. "Have known. I'll explain as much as I can, and this should actually count as your first favor." I nodded, and turned back to the view as I listened.

"Firstly, I should tell you of my race. We call ourselves draconeqi, and, in case you haven't noticed, are beings of chaos. Our world, or rather, dimension, is like the trash bin of the universe. Concepts, ideas, stories, thrown out pieces of rubbish - they all end up there. As such, its inhabitants are pieced together like a patchwork doll, made up of the many things that the universe dumps our way. We are a peaceful lot, content to sit back and watch as time rolls by, throwing it's interesting debris down on us for our amusement. Well, most of us were content to sit back and watch."

I frowned. "Discord?"

"Ding-ding-ding! We have a winner! You're a lot smarter than you look." He chuckled and clacked his lobster claws again, something I noticed that seemed to be a habit. "Anyway, dear old Dad was one of the most powerful of our kind, and decided it wasn't enough to simply observe and collect the chaos of the cosmos, and that he had to go out and make some. So, he did. But, Dad was quite interested in the junk we got from one world in particular. Your homeworld, Earth, as you call it. Drawn to this place, he was, like a moth to a candle.

"And let me be the first to say that humans are by far the most entertaining creatures to watch. Discord barely had to do anything on Earth, in fact, as you all seemed hell-bent on creating your own special brand of chaos. He often spoke fondly of it, in fact. But eventually, he got bored with it. He wanted to create his own chaos, you see, not simply jump into a steaming pile of it and wallow around like a pig in the mud. And so, he came to the perfect world, unblemished by any form of chaos whatsoever. He used it as his canvas, a blank piece of paper free of doodles. That world was called Equestria.

"And you know what happened then. He eventually he met Celestia, I was born, and then afterwards he was overthrown. But he often was unsatisfied with his work in Equestria, you see. Despite all his efforts, no matter how badly he messed things here, Earth was always just a little bit more crazy, just a little bit more random. And don't get me started on how he reacted once humans invented the Internet. Great galloping gods, man, that was probably the single most brilliant thing your kind has ever invented! Twisted, sadistic, and disgusting, yes, but brilliant nevertheless."

I had to agree with him on that one. The Internet could be a very dark, scary place. Where else can you find flying pop-tart cats that whiz around through space and shit rainbows?

And don't get me started on all the porn.

"Discord then came up with his greatest scheme of chaos yet. Why not bring one of your kind here? You were obviously so much better at mucking things up than he was, and once a human was here, doing their thing, he could still lay claim to it being his work. He never got the chance to do so the last time he was up and about, although it seems that with his new-found freedom, he decided to initiate his plan. And so, to the best of my knowledge, that is why you are in Equestria."

That was... disconcerting. So my arrival here hadn't been completely random. Discord had obviously premeditated this, to quite a high degree. Even so, there was a fatal flaw in his plan.

"I hate to disappoint him, but I've got no intention of spreading chaos around. I just want to see the world, and learn what I can."

Disarray grew very smug at this. "But you have been, Echo. Despite your noble goal, you've already begun shaking things up around here, for better or for worse. In fact, during your short stay, so far you've befriended one of Equestria's cultural icons, tossed her arch-nemesis into a black pit, and released the son of the Princess from a two thousand year imprisonment. Whether you like it or not, you are most certainly setting things into motion that will have lasting consequences for years to come."

He was right, on all accounts, and I was somewhat peeved at him for that. It's not like I'd intended to do any of these things. Well, with the exception of tossing Ahuizotl down that hole. That was on purpose. The blue bastard had it coming.

I felt a large paw on my shoulder, and I turned to see Disarray had put one of his bear arms on me. "As for your second request, no, I cannot send you back home, even if either of us wanted to. Only my father can do that, and he won't be around for much longer."

Well, at least I'd tried. There was now no doubt that I'd be staying here for a very, very long time.

"And for request number three, you asked me to help you on your journey. And so, I will. However, I am not some kind of ace in the hole. I will assist you only when you need my help, not when you want it. Although, I'm feeling rather generous tonight, so I'll give you a freebie. For my first bit of help, I highly recommend that you get your pegasus friend inside to the nearest medical center. Ta-ta for now!" And with that, he leaned over the edge of the balcony and rolled off.

I lunged, attempting to catch him, but he twisted away mid-air and crossed his arms behind his head, assuming a reclining position as he fell. Just before he would have entered the canopy, there was a flash of light, and he was gone.

Show off.

I pushed back through the netting and observed Daring Do. She definitely did not look too good at this point. With a sigh, I went and got her map of the region from the small cabinet, and spread it out onto the kitchen table. The multitude of colored markings was confusing for a moment, but eventually I located the nearest settlement to the treehouse.

Roughly eighty kilometers away to the northeast, there was a small settlement labeled on the map, called Wethoof Village. I figured this was where Daring picked up supplies every once and awhile. The explorer might be resourceful, but she had to get the materials for this treehouse from somewhere.

I did a rough calculation in my head. On all fours, I could travel very fast, about thirty, thirty-five miles-an-hour, and hold that pace for quite a distance. If the village was that far away, it would take me about an hour and a half of running at full speed to reach it, but I strongly doubted that, because I'd be traveling through dense jungle, somehow carrying Daring Do with me. I glanced outside at the night. The light from the stars and the moon was bright enough to see by, and my new eyes seemed to be quite capable to adjusting to darkness. Visibility would be no problem.

I began gathering supplies for the trip. I packed light, and I packed only the essentials for what I'd need. Several gems from Daring's store would serve as food. They were surprisingly chock full of nutrients, and I could usually just eat one a day and feel at the top of my game. I emptied out some of the organic food from my backpack, as well as the metal stakes we'd thought we'd need for our trip to the temple. I stuffed the medical kit in there, and with the added room, it barely fit. My psychology binder was coming with me, no exceptions. That contained all my notes on the Equestrian language, as well as Equestria itself. I checked my clothing. The sleeveless sweatshirt was battered and torn, but it would suffice. The belt, made of strips of denim and t-shirt, seemed to be holding out well enough, but I'd need to replace both soon.

Finally, I rolled up Daring's map and grabbed her compass from her saddlebags. Now that I had what I needed, I had to address the problem of moving the explorer herself. She was dead to the world, and a few light prods with my finger revealed that she was unlikely to awaken soon, unless she got some help. I redid the wrapping on her wing, as tight as I could. Hopefully that should keep the blood flow to a minimum until we got to Wethoof. But how was I going to carry her?

Ah! Idea! The hammock she was lying in soon found itself converted into a cocoon, snugly wrapped across my chest. I cut a hole in it for Daring's face to hang out, so that she wouldn't suffocate. The hammock was tied over one shoulder and under the other, and the knot was covered by my pack. The pegasus was surprisingly light, and I barely felt her weight. Perhaps she had a hollow bone structure, like birds?

I pushed out of the netting and did a final check. The compass dangled from around my neck by the shoelace, and the map was tightly folded into my belt. My pack was full to bursting with only the essentials; water, food, rope, and a medical kit. I double checked the knot keeping Daring snug across my chest. It was tight. Good. She wasn't going anywhere.

I suddenly realized that despite my efforts, there was something I hadn't taken into account.

How was I going to get down?

I sat down, hard. My pack made a faint rattling noise, and I felt something brush up against my side. I craned my neck to see that the rope was poking out from one of the pockets.

The rope!

I quickly pulled it out and tested its strength. It was rather sturdy, despite the fact that it wasn't nylon. I quickly rushed back into the treehouse and tied it tightly around the tree, before spooling out the rest of it's length by my feet on the balcony. I gave the treehouse one last look. This may be the last time I'll ever see it. It had been good to me, and I couldn't help but feeling as though I was betraying it by leaving.

I wrapped the rope several times around my left arm and gripped it tightly, holding onto it closer to the tree than the free end, and allowing that bit to dangle. This had better work.

I took a deep breath and vaulted as far over the edge as I could.

The jungle immediately spread out before me and began to rush closer. The sickening sensation of falling came up into my stomach as I plummeted towards the ground.

The rope abruptly tightened around my arm and I felt myself rudely screech to a halt, and silently snarled in pain as my arm nearly popped out of its socket. I was suddenly swinging towards the huge tree, instead of traveling outwards. I twisted my body towards the trunk and slammed into it, hard. My legs and free arm took the brunt of the impact, working like powerful, furry shock absorbers. With my free paw, I whipped out my claws and sank them deep into the bark. Good. I was as now attached to the tree.

I craned my neck up and chomped through the rope, quickly flashing out my other paw and clawing onto the bark to pick up the slack. I was now clinging to the monstrous softwood, several hundred feet above the ground. I slowly began to slide downwards, the sharpness of my claws cutting through the wood like a hot knife through butter. I used my rear legs as brakes, controlling my descent so that I wasn't going too fast, but fast enough for my arms to be shaking with the effort of keeping them locked.

I spared a glance downwards and saw the canopy speeding towards me. I winced and ducked my head down as I passed through the foliage, the branches and vines whipping at me as I sped through them.

WHUMPH!

Ah, the ground. My good friend. How I've missed you so.

I dazedly rolled off my back, giving a silent apology to the bush I'd just flattened. My descent had carved eight deep lines in the tree, and I couldn't help but whistle as I noticed my claws, still extended, were smoking a little bit. In all honesty, I'd had no idea that would work.

A quick glance at my compass pointed me in the right direction. With a grunt, I began loping through the undergrowth as fast as I could, Daring Do tucked safely against me for the moment.

It seemed my journey through Equestria had begun. For better or for worse, I was now heading off to Wethoof, the first stop in what could be an odyssey of epic proportions. Hopefully the ponies there could fix Daring Do up before I left. I wanted to say goodbye and thank her before I set out. We both had known this day was coming, ever since I told her of my desire to travel.

But I wouldn't be going it alone. I now had a very interesting traveling companion, whom I strongly suspected was watching me even now.

Discord had been right. I was definitely shaking things up.

Clever bastard.

(8) Close Encounters of the Furry Kind

Purpose.

Is that not what we strive for? Meaning. Identity. A sense of use.

It is a commonly accepted fact that an individual, when posed with an extremely stressful situation, is much more likely to panic and behave irrationally when they have absolutely no idea of what they should be doing. They need a purpose. A person who has a plan, or at least some concept of what they could do in said situation, will generally not end up freaking out, and, nine times out of ten, not fuck things up even more so then they already are.

Hopefully, I thought, this is not that tenth time.

The thick, damp undergrowth of the jungle whizzed by me at a pace I was unfamiliar with. Plants I had no names for flickered by on the fringes of my vision, which remained resolutely forward. The ground, soft and spongy with decaying leaves, was torn up in the places my paws landed.

On all fours, I found that my maneuverability was greatly enhanced. And so, I found myself streaking along at a rate that was somewhat frightening. An obstacle would appear in my path, a tree or a bush perhaps, and before I was even conscious of my motions, I would somehow dart around it, without even bothering a second glance, for the burden wrapped tightly against my chest was not worth the distraction.

I was a machine. By all rights, I should have been panicking. I should have been huddled in a corner hugging a teddy bear, slowly rocking back and forth. I should have been a blubbering, useless, wreck of a being. But I wasn't. I was a machine.

Machines do not have time to feel. They simply do what they are told, and they do it to the best of their ability. I had but one goal above all others at this moment.

Get Daring Do to safety.

After that? Well, I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

The run was taking its toll on both of us. Still somewhat unused to my body, I had sustained several scrapes and bruises from not reacting fast enough. Even with my new instinctual reflexes, I was not immune to the lashing branches, the grabbing roots, or the solidity of a tree-trunk. Daring, though still safe, was fading faster than I'd anticipated.

I let out an irritated grunt as I leaped clear over a gully, scrabbling at the loamy dirt for a precious few seconds before I regained my rhythm. The rush of wind in my sensitive ears had long since ceased to be registered. I crested a slow rise, and smoothly switched to three legs as I checked the compass now dangling around my neck. North-north-east.

The needle swung back to the correct heading as I adjusted course accordingly. I passed through a particularly dense thicket of brambles, and wrapped an arm around my chest, protecting my cargo, as I ripped though the growth, opening up another score of small, irritating wounds that only served to spur me onward.

I dashed onward, going straight through a rotting tree, its soft bark offering little resistance as a single slash of my claws bisected it like an executioner's axe.

I suddenly found myself out of the murk of the undergrowth, running across open ground. The land had been cleared away, and thick stumps were all that remained of the rain-forest. I grinned, despite the damage to the land. There, on the horizon, was a large object, silhouetted by the moon, that could only be my goal.

Wethoof Village.

Now that I was out of the forest, I really opened up on the gas, and promptly began sprinting the home stretch. I risked a glance around. The ground was wet and boggy, littered with shallow pools of water, and seemed to be strangely marked, as if something big had been dragged across it recently in a heedless path. What could have done that?

Suddenly, I found myself slide to a halt. There was nowhere left to go. I was here... but there was a problem. I'd found out where all the trees had gone.

The village had a wall.

Encircling what seemed to be the entire settlement, and made up of the newly-cut trunks of the rainforest giants, stretching several stories tall. One alone was as wide as my armspan, which I estimated to be between seven and eight feet. I could not see over it.

I snorted in frustration. There has to be some way to get in and out. But where? I ran around the wall, hugging the edge as tightly as I could to reduce the distance. The trees making up the surface suddenly changed, from newly cut to much older. I noticed large markings in this wood, but paid it no heed.

There! A towering, double-doorway, made of what looked to be entire slabs of wood, with enormous chunks of bark overlaying this as a sort of protective reinforcement. A guard tower loomed over the side of the wall, and I could make out the slumped shape of what was obviously a pony asleep at their post.

I remembered my first encounter with Daring. It hadn't been the smoothest of introductions, and she'd really only warmed up to me until after I'd fought off Ahuizotl's cats. This would be my first contact with any other pony. Perhaps I should take a different approach?

I glanced down at the wounded pegasus, still unconscious in her cocoon. A light blotch of red was beginning to seep through the wrapping. My mind was made up.

FORMALITIES BE DAMNED!

I sank my paw into the ground and tore out a chunk of dirt about the size of a volleyball. I cocked my arm back and let it fly at the slumped shape in the guardtower. It made a terrific thwack as it splattered into the tower not a foot from their head. The guard suddenly jerked about, startled from its rest and now covered in a fine coating of muck. The pony rushed to the side, wiping gunk off its face with a foreleg. I squinted in vain to make out its face, but the tower roof cast too thick of a shadow.

"Hey! Who goes there?" a feminine voice cried, vainly attempting to sound threatening.

I extended my claws and waved my arms wildly to get her attention, the soft purple glow of the contrails leaving an eerie tint to the air.

She couldn't help but see the sudden light show on the doorstep. "What in Celestia's mane? You there! Dog! What's that you're doing with your claws?" she shouted down at me.

"I need to enter the town. I have a wounded mare with me that needs medical help." I wrote in large characters, somewhat sloppily written due to my impatience.

"You can write?!"

"Oh, you got me. I'm just making random squiggly lines in the air. But if you want, I can draw a nice picture of you being sent to the moon."

"What, can't you speak? Cat got your tongue?""

Ha-ha. No, smartass. My tongue is fine, and it was actually a big, blue... monkey-shark-cat... thing. Whatever. "I lost my voice. I use my claws to speak for me, now. Now let me in! I need help! My friend is hurt!"

"No Diamond Dogs allowed in Wethoof."

What? All right, now this is getting ridiculous. "At least open the gate so my friend can get in!"

"Oh, and I'm sure you'll just stay there while the gate's wide open, eh?"

"Why would I do anything else?"

She snorted at me. "Because you're a flea-bitten Diamond Dog, that's why."

"I find your lack of faith disturbing." Even more disturbing was the fact that this was coming from a pony. I thought these guys were supposed to be all happy and friendly? No matter. I have to get help to Daring. "Look, why don't I leave her at the gate, and then I'll go far enough away so that there's no way I can enter in time?"

"And probably the second I open it, some more Dogs will pop out of the ground, not ten feet away from the gate! Piss off, mutt! I'm not buying your charade!" she sneered.

She thought I was lying? About something as serious as this? Great. More prejudice against Diamond Dogs. I so did not have time for this. I adopted an aggressive stance, and silently bared my teeth up at the guardsmare.

"We can either do this the easy way, or the hard way. Preferably the hard way, because it will take so much less time."

"Oh yeah? What's the easy way?"

"I try to convince you to open the gates."

"Hah! Fat chance of that happening, fleabag! What's the hard way?"

Two heavily compacted balls of muck sped up into the night, slamming into her shadowed features with frightening intensity. The guard collapsed back into the tower, knocked willy-nilly by the twin impacts.

I probably should have been a little more diplomatic, but desperate times call for unnecessary violence.

I wiped the dirt from my paws, grinning despite the dire situation. I slid my glowing claws against eachother, and to my surprise, bright sparks of purple-pink energy flickered off them.

Whoa. Now this changes things up a little. I could have some fun here.

I began rubbing my claws together as fast as I could, and the sparks began streaming off into the ground. The claws themselves began to shine brighter and brighter, until the intensity was almost blinding to my dark-adjusted eyes. After another few seconds of rubbing, my claws began to feel hot. It was as if someone had lit a match to your fingernail. The heat began to build, until one of the sparks suddenly caught into the motions and ignited.

My claws suddenly erupted into a withering fire, the softly glowing lengths now replaced by angry, flickering streaks of violet flame.

Awwwwwwwwwww yeeeaaaaaaaah!

I cracked my neck a few times, and charged the door. My arms whipped out, and the fiery claws burrowed into a chunk of bark reinforcement with ease. Smoke began seeping from around my claws, and the wood surrounding them started to blacken. I clenched my fists, and wrenched backwards with all my strength.

The charred slab of bark ripped off the gate with ease. I tossed it to the ground, where it slammed into the muck with a loud squelch, and tore into the underlying wood, hacking away with powerful slashes of my paws. Wood splintered everywhere as I windmilled into the gate, my claws all but shining streaks of light in the darkness. I tore and punched and slashed with the ferocity of desperation. Nothing was going to keep me from getting my friend to safety. Over the din of my destruction, I began to hear shouting, but put it out of my mind. Almost through now...

My paw gave the gate another powerful blow, and I could see through it now to the other side. I redoubled my efforts, and charred wood chips filled the air as I became a Diamond Dog version of a chainsaw. And then, I was though. I sheathed my claws, wincing with the pain of the magical fire being extinguished inside my fingers, and shouldered through the jagged gap in the gate I had carved.

"HALT!"

I screeched to a stop, suddenly aware of my surroundings again. Encircling me with my back to the gate was a ring of ponies, a mix of fear and anger on their faces. They were armed to the teeth - literally. Several held torches either in the crux of an elbow or in their teeth. One, a deep red mare, was actually holding a pitchfork in her mouth. A pitchfork!

The pony that had addressed me shouldered through the crowd. He was a unicorn, and seemed to be a little on the old side, but held himself with the air of somepony that is used to being listened to. He was a dark gold color, and had a mane that was of a pale, icy blue, streaked with gray. The mark on his flank showed the image of a metal shield emblazoned with a red cross.

He approached me and held his ground a few steps away, calmly sizing me up with steely eyes, both of color and expression. He noticed Daring Do, still wrapped around my chest, and his ears flicked backward in surprise. He whirled around and faced the crowd.

"Ginger!" he barked in a gruff, yet soft voice. "What is the meaning of this?"

A cinnamon-colored unicorn mare stepped forward, head held high in defiance. She was covered in muck, an sported a black eye. Ah, this must be that guard...

"No Diamond Dogs allowed in Wethoof. You heard the mayor," she stated angrily, in the same voice that I'd heard from the guard tower. She must have alerted the rest of the village while I was occupied with the gate.

"You said he was alone, and that he posed some kind of danger," the stallion retorted. "You were wrong on both accounts, Ginger. Surely this counts as an exception. Look at that mare! She's bleeding out as we speak!" He turned to me. "Dog, release her. You obviously don't intend to harm us if you're willing to save a wounded pegasus."

I gingerly undid the knot holding Daring to my chest, gently laying her on the ground in front of the stallion. I backed away a few steps, nervously eyeing the crowd, who were still glaring at me.

Ginger looked outraged. "This is against the law! We have these rules for a reason, and you're openly defying them!"

"Not without merit! You lied through your teeth about the injured mare, simply to prevent the Dog from entering! You deliberately denied him entry, even at the cost of a life! There's a fine line between following orders and losing what makes you a pony, and tonight, Ginger, you have crossed it."

She was rebuffed by this, her confidence suddenly wilting. "But-but-but... I... He said..."

The stallion rounded on her with incredible fury. "I DO NOT CARE WHAT HE SAID, GINGER SNAP! THERE IS A PONY'S LIFE AT STAKE HERE! IF YOU SO MUCH AS THINK ABOUT INTERFERING WITH THIS A SECOND TIME, I WILL HAVE YOU TIED TO THE WALL!" Ginger Snap backed away with every syllable, visibly wincing on that last threat. "Now, two ponies take the wounded mare to the infirmary."

Two more mares from the crowd quickly rushed forward, nervously approaching me before lifting up Daring Do onto their shoulders. They set out at a rapid pace, and the crowd parted for them quickly, before closing again like a bear trap, preventing me from seeing where they went.

"Now..." The stallion turned his gaze back to me again. "As for you. Who are you, and how did you come across that mare?"

I slowly held my paws up, and deliberately extended each of my claws with utmost care. The crowd flinched back in surprise, including the stallion, as they began to glow again, thankfully not on fire anymore. I mentally sighed. If this was how everyone was going to react every time I came to a new place, then it could get old rather quickly.

"My name is Echo. The pegasus I brought here for help is Daring Do, the explorer. I have been staying with her in her treehouse for the past few weeks, as her guest."

There was an audible gasp as the ponies assembled beheld the words I carved into the air. The stallion took a step forward, although it was not in a threatening manner. He seemed to be taking my unique method of communication in stride, at least. "How is it that you came to know her, Echo?"

"I saved her life." I drew one claw across my neck, indicating the gleaming white scar on my throat. "And in return, she saved mine. In the process, however, I lost my voice."

"And why is it that she is in her current condition?"

"No. She was injured during our attempt at exploring a recently opened ruin."

He looked genuinely surprised at this. "Daring Do working together with a Diamond Dog. Huh. And why is it that you can read and write in such a manner?"

"She taught me. As for the whole 'glowing claws' thing, that's none of your business."

The stallion gave me a queer look, then. "You are a most unusual member of your species, Echo. Tell me, are you from around here?"

I grinned and shook my head. There was no way he'd believe the truth, so I'd just play the role of the ignorant foreigner.

"Then you do not realize the significance of your actions here tonight." He suddenly looked grave. "While your intentions may have been noble, you have caused much harm to this village."

What did he mean by that? "I do not understand."

"Turn around, and see for yourself."

I did. Before me, the massive gate loomed. However, now it sported a particularly nasty gaping hole at the bottom. It was if someone had fired a giant cannon straight into the gate, the round had simply vaporized it's way clear through. Smoke and wreckage alike came from the improvised entryway. A couple ponies were frantically pouring buckets of water into it, and behind me, I heard the rumble and clatter of an approaching wagon. I turned around to see a large wagon pulled by a strong looking draft pony, filled to the brim with lumber and carpentry tools. It moved through the crowd and past us, before coming to a halt in front of the damage. Quick as a wink, a group of ponies hopped out the back and began unloading the equipment.

Eh-heh-heh... did I do that? Whoops... my bad!

Wait a tic. Why are these guys so keen on their gate?

I looked back at the golden stallion, who was regarding me with an indescribable expression. "This wall. Why do you have it? Such a thing only serves two purposes. To keep something in, or-"

"-To keep something out," he interrupted somberly.

Wonderful. There was obviously something worth worrying about that was posing a threat to their village. I gave the walls another glance. Apparently, it was something dangerous enough to merit the construction of a massive wall made out of irreplaceable trees, damaging the landscape in the process.

And I'd torn a hole right through it.

The ponies still circling us eyed me warily, as if I'd suddenly go crazy and decide to maul them. Only the old unicorn seemed to be somewhat at ease around me, and I suspected this was because he was somehow unbiased towards my kind.

"Citizens. Please, return to your homes. The Diamond Dog will do you no harm under my watch. Somepony contact the mayor and tell him what has transpired here tonight. If he raises word about it, I want to hear why." The unicorn addressed the crowd with calm and ease. They responded immediately, but still cast wary glances over there shoulders as they left, traveling off to a dense cluster of buildings a few hundred feet away. "Blueback and Popper. Come with us." Two burly pegasi peeled off from the crowd and stood at attention. The stallion turned to me again. "You as well."

The two pegasi exchanged a glance, then moved up to either side of me. I could not help but feel as though they were intended to ensure that I'd not try anything.

The golden unicorn proceeded to stride through the charred hole in the gate, and I followed closely behind. Once again, I found myself facing the mighty fortifications from the outside, tinged silver in the moonlight. My escorts grimly maintained position on either side of me, and I noticed that their wings were trembling a little. Were they really afraid of me?

The smoking wound in their entryway was probably evidence enough. After seeing the destruction I was capable of, even I was beginning to regard myself cautiously. It didn't help that I was still unfamiliar with my body.

It felt strange to be standing in open ground after so long in the forest. The surrounding landscape was barren, and now that I had the chance to look at it, the scattered tree-trunks dotting the land in between the shallow, muddy puddles looked rather freshly cut.

"This village has existed for generations, living in harmony with the surrounding rainforest and it's inhabitants," began the stallion. "That is, until recently. A few weeks ago, the local predators began to act strangely. Violent. Aggressive. Territorial. Ponies began to be attacked and dragged into the forest. We couldn't fight them off, so we did the next best thing. We built a wall.

"It's a marvel, really. When I came here to address the problem, I didn't think that this town of swamp-dwelling bumpkins had it in them to build something so impressive in such a short span of time. We cleared out all the trees in the area to do it, something I'm admittedly rather not proud of. But in having to choose between the life of a pony and the life of a tree, the choice is clear. The forest will grow back in time, we will ensure that, but ponies aren't as lucky. And so, you find Wethoof as a twisted reflection of what it once was. Instead of welcoming nature to our doorstep, we fear it and cower behind a wall made of the dead hulks of the very things that make this area great." The stallion dug a thin line in the ground with a forehoof.

I crouched down beside him, silent as always. At this level, we now literally saw eye to eye. He was obviously highly respected, and seemed to be unlike any of the other ponies I had seen. The others listened to him, even going so far as to disobey the laws that this town's mayor had set in place. Perhaps he held some kind of military rank?

"What is your role in all of this, sir?" I scrawled. Worth a shot into the dark, I suppose.

He eyed the floating characters with interest. "My name is Captain Tythus." Ah, so my assumptions were correct. "I was a former member of Princess Celestia's Royal Guard, and served under General Greywing for twenty-five years as a medic as well as a commanding officer for my squadron. I retired some time after the Nightmare Moon fiasco, but was soon reactivated and sent by the Princess herself to assist Wethoof Village with it's current, ah, predicament."

Wow. This guy had met the Princess! I could learn a lot from him... and to top it, he was ex-Royal Guard. I assumed they were the elite of Equestria's military, although I knew little of it to go by. That explained why this guy held himself like that. His entire being radiated a calm, 'seen it all before' demeanor I had observed from many others during the few years I had served in the army. Here was a pony who knew how to get things done. But still...

"Why would the Princess send a retired officer all the way out here? It looks like your predator problem is quite serious, if the construction of that wall was needed." I scratched my chin thoughtfully.

Captain Tythus was again dumbstruck. "Your perception is somewhat alarming, Echo. Diamond Dogs are not known for their intelligence."

I gave him a loopy grin. "Neither am I."

"Quite. I am the single representative from the Crown here because all active-duty troops are currently occupied with the resurgence of Discord. The last report I received from Canterlot said that he had transformed Ponyville into a warped nexus of chaotic energy, and that was at least a week ago."

Hmmm... If that happened a week ago, then Discord was most definitely defeated by now. Guess I was as good as stranded, then. Might as well make the best of it.

"Do not worry too much about Discord, Captain. Focus on here and now. Speaking of which, can you tell me about these predators of yours? I intend on staying in the town or at least in the vicinity until my friend has recovered. It would be nice to know if something's going to try and eat me." I stood up and adjusted my hood, eyeing the bleak landscape warily.

"Oh, yes. You'll know everything about our problem, Echo. You're going be helping us with it." Tythus began to slowly trot off to the left, his hooves making soft squelching noises in the muck.

Wait... what?

I caught up with him in three strides, my two feathered shadows rushing to maintain their positions by my side. "Whoa whoa whoa! Who ever said anything about that?"

"You did," he calmly stated, "when you tore a hole through my gate. The town is now at risk, and you are the only one at fault for this."

"What? But the guardsmare wouldn't let me pass! I had to get in somehow or Daring would have bled out on your doorstep!"

"Regardless of Ginger Snap's actions, or Miss Do's status, neither of them were the ones who decided to destroy the only line of defense keeping my ponies from harm. You, Echo, are to blame for this. Nopony else."

I made no reply, instead electing to fall into a brooding silence. We walked around the wall for a time, the three ponies now maintaining an uneasy triangle around me, the two pegasi in to my rear, and Captain Tythus to my front. After a time, he came to a halt, and I almost walked into his flanks.

"This is what we face," he said simply, and faced the wall. Blueback and Popper did as well, their feathers abruptly bristling in what I assumed was the pegasi equivalent of raised hackles.

Puzzled, I turned to see what he referred to. During my initial run to the town, I had whipped around the wall, barely baying it any attention. In hindsight, it probably would have benefited me greatly to have done so. The reason for Wethoof's barricading was carved into the massive wall in such a way that it drew my disbelieving eyes more so than an advertisement in Times Square.

The massive trunks had been savaged here, jaggedly crisscrossed with heavy, deep lines in rows of three. In some places, entire sections of a trunk were simply gone, great, gaping wounds that suspiciously looked like bite marks indicating that pieces had simply been ripped off of the wall.

I slowly approached the monolithic wall, and gingerly laid a paw into one of the smaller grooves. It was far wider than my paw, and went several feet into the tree. I involuntarily shuddered. Whatever had done this was incredibly large, and incredibly dangerous. It made the hole I had bored into the gate look like a bullet wound, while this... this was like strapping a grenade to something and pulling the pin. This was terrifying.

I was completely stunned. Had I a voice, I would have been incapable of using it. Instead, I turned back to the Catain and shakily scrawled out my words into the air, my paws trembling.

"What did this?"

The answer was as grim as the destruction behind me.

"Hydras."

"Oh. Wonderful. If you'll excuse me for one moment."

I slowly turned and proceeded to slam my head into the wall. Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

Why couldn't I have thought things through? Why couldn't I have just stopped and said to myself, 'hey, maybe these guys need this wall for something!' Maybe by ripping a giant hole through it, you might have possibly screwed them all over! And he said 'hydras!' That implies that there's MORE THAN ONE! I felt sick, nauseous with the knowledge that I'd possibly doomed an entire village.

A pair of hooves on my shoulders wrenched me back from my self-abuse. I tottered back a few steps before spinning and regaining my balance. I found Captain Tythus looking at me with an amused expression on his face.

"Done yet?"

I sniffled and buried my face in my paws. "Maybe one more?"

He sighed and shook his head. "Come on, then. It's no use sobbing over soggy hay. We'll take you to your quarters for the time being. Tomorrow, your service begins."

As we trudged through the mud back to the gate, I hung my head in shame. My tail was drooped even lower, scraping the ground.

At least Daring is going to be all right. That much I accomplished tonight. But despite my terrible mistake, I couldn't help but feel a little reassured by the Captain's words. I was going to be doing something now, something to help these ponies. Even if I had made a terrible first impression, there was still the possibility of turning that around. I had a meaning.

I had a purpose.

(9) Raiding the Kitchen

I wearily rubbed my face with my paws, feeling anxious and oddly complacent at the same time. The room I had been given was bare and ugly, with no window and a small, flat cot resting on the ground. Aside from that, it was sparsely furnished, nothing else in the room besides a dingy cabinet, a clock, and a mirror, probably used by the guards to examine themselves before presenting to a superior officer. It was the cot that I sat on now, my mind racing at full speed despite the need for sleep.

I checked the time. 4:57.

My quarters were inside the newest building in Wethoof; the barracks. In times past, this town had had no need of such an occupation, much less the place to house those of its pursuit. All that had changed however, with the recent problems with the hydras.

"How many are there?" I had asked Captain Tythus as we walked through the village a few hours ago, now sleeping somewhat peacefully in the murky gloom of the night.

"Over a hundred. A whole nest, in fact." His replies were always carefully worded and well thought out, despite the fact that he always responded instantly.

"All fully grown?"

"No. Only a few big ones. It's the babies you want to watch out for, though. They are small enough to get through that hole in the gate, but large enough to take on several of my ponies at once. Doesn't help that they've all got more than one head."

Delightful. At least that explained why he was so worried about the hole.

I tried to push the guilt out of my head as I sat on the cot. I'd been given the room at the end of the dormitory, which was actually quite unfilled. Wethoof had had little time to train a proper amount of guards, and as such, there were a good number of other rooms of this kind sitting vacant. Tythus, and surprisingly, Ginger Snap, were in charge of recruitment, and while many had volunteered, few were actually capable of handling the harsh life of a guardspony. From what I had observed so far, there were roughly thirty to thirty-five functional ponies capable of defending the town under the command of the captain. That wasn't even a quarter of the number required.

I distracted myself with a gear check. It gave me something to do, at least. My backpack was now officially retired. My run through the jungle had torn several gashes in the tough canvas, and the shoulder straps were on the verge of snapping. There was little use for it now besides scavenging the material for some other form of clothing. My belt had also been torn, almost completely though, and I regretted using a simple rolled-up t-shirt for the material, as it wasn't very durable at all. My sleeveless sweatshirt was in dire need of a seamstress, and one of the holes my ears poked through had been expanded down to the neck by some dangling thorn-bush. And, to top it off, everything was covered in a generous coating of plant guts, charred wood chips, and mud.

I hadn't fared much better, either. Numerous small slashes covered my arms and legs from crashing through dense undergrowth at high speed. A particularly nasty cut had actually torn a deep gash in my ear. I now sported a deep, V-shaped gap in my right ear that made me look somewhat feral, if my scruffy appearance wasn't enough to influence that.

I checked the time again. 4:58.

Oh, you have got to be kidding me.

The silence was overbearing, and I could stand it no longer. Anxious to do something, anything, I decided to at least try and make the effort of looking presentable for tomorrow. I had to make a good impression on the villagers, and while I was here, I'd rather them not regard me with such hostility.

The hallway was quiet and dark, and as I silently crept out of my room, I almost felt like a naughty child sneaking downstairs after their parent fall asleep to feast on some leftover dessert. My paws padded softly on the hardwood as I made my way into the central room of the barracks.

This building had been clearly built for military use. Only the basics had been included. The large, open chamber I walked into now made up the assembly hall as well as the dining hall, and I suspected served as a rec room as well for off-duty guards. The south wing, where I had just come from, was only a simple hallway lined with doors leading into the rooms. There was no north wing. Instead, there was only a double door leading outside. The western wing contained the kitchens, while the eastern wing, my destination, held the bathroom and other facilities.

I brought my sweatshirt, or what was left of it, with me into the communal showers. I found it somewhat strange that there was only one room for such a task, and that stallions and mares often used it at the same time. Then again, ponies didn't usually wear clothes, so I attributed my un-Equestrian immodesty to my past life. I honestly shouldn't have been bothered by this. After all, I had spent all my time here without any pants on (really enjoyed the breezes, by the way) and hadn't felt self conscious about it.

At least the water is hot. Scalding, almost, but I liked it that way. I lathered myself up with suds from a dispenser and set to work giving myself a good clean. It was the first real one I'd had since I got here, and I sorely needed it. The scent of wet dog flooded the room, but was soon replaced by that warm, soapy smell so commonly attributed to bath-time.

It took me a surprisingly long time to clean myself, due to all of my fur. I now held a healthy respect for all the long-haired women I'd known back on earth. Having a luscious coat is somewhat annoying. Weirdly enough, I thought I heard my mother, yelling at me to get behind the ears. I obliged the imaginary voice, and suddenly felt homesick.

The sweatshirt got a bath, too. It was the only piece of clothing I owned that was still wearable, and I washed out as much of the dirt and plant stains as I could, before hanging it up to dry from an unused shower head. Now I had to dry off as well. Sadly, I had forgotten to find a towel of some sort.

Almost as soon as I turned the water off, my body was seized with an uncontrollable urge to move. Helpless to resist, I found myself on all fours, shaking myself off just like an earth dog. Water flew from my coat, which now shone a deep, bronze-brown, streaked with red, while the creamy fur on my chest and neck was spotlessly gleaming.

Ha! Doing that never gets old.

I wrung out my sweatshirt and whipped it a few times to get rid of the remaining water. Surprisingly, it completely dried off. I assumed this was just another quirk to the cartoon-like physics of this world. I resolved to investigate it later. In the meantime, I needed something to eat.

As I made my way back across the central hall, my pawsteps resounded weirdly off the walls. It feels very, very strange to be completely alone in such an open space that is so commonly filled up with bodies.

The western wing's kitchen was surprisingly well stocked. A variety of foods could be found in the pantry, and from this, my knowledge of Equestrian culture was expanded greatly.

It seems that while ponies are not carnivorous, they do use some animal products, such as milk and cheese, in their foods. I found eggs as well, although I doubted they were fertilized ones. Oat-based products are apparently a staple of their diet, right up there with fruits and vegetables. I also discovered that they eat a large amount of grass and hay, as well. Ponies eating grass. Didn't see that one coming. A bag of peanuts and several large cubes of salt told me that they got all the protein and salts they needed from other sources.

I, however, was not a pony. I had sharp teeth, with only a few molars in the back. That meant I was technically an omnivore, although I could consume gems as well. However, the enticing aromas from the kitchen pressured me to consume some real food, for once. And to boot, my gems had fallen out of a hole torn in my backpack. I needed a high energy diet to sustain myself, so I set about making some omelets. I took down a wide skillet and a spatula from the hanging rack in the center of the kitchen and started up the stove. It was a large, flat top one, and seemed to be powered by electricity, somehow. I made a mental note to find out where villages get their power from, because I had seen no power lines, above or under the ground, when I was outside.

A slap of butter from a nearby stick soon began to soften and melt as the pan heated up. Satisfied with that, I began to whistle softly as I got out some ingredients from a nearby fridge.

Eggs? Check. Oh, peppers! Checkarooni. Some tomatoes, mushrooms, onions, a little bit of cheese... check, check, check, and a little bit of check. A few leaves of basil were added to my list of ingredients, as well. I gotta hand (or paw, if you will) it to the Italians, fresh leaves of basil really make a dish perfect. They know how to cook. Some crumbled-up bacon would probably make this delicious as well, but that was out of the question, so I'd just go heavy on the salt to make up for it.

I was feeling rather hungry, and the skillet was quite wide, so I proceeded to crack a half dozen eggs into a small bowl, before whipping the yolks open with the spatula. The yellow goop made a soft sizzling sound as it was poured out into the pan. I quickly began sprinkling the ingredients onto the top, giving an artful pinch of this here, or a dusting of that over there.

On Earth, I had lived rather meagerly. Not enough for much discomfort, but enough to know what it feels like to go hungry every once and a while. Chef Boyardee was a good friend of mine, as well as a dreaded dinner guest. As such, whenever I was given the chance to eat well, I took it with gusto. This also applied to cooking. When the opportunity presented itself to create something marvelously delicious that wasn't prepacked in plastic, I put on an imaginary chef hat and set to work.

And an imaginary monocle, too. Can't go wrong with those, and it makes me feel damn sophisticated.

A second pan soon joined the skillet on the stove, and I set about hunting for something else to cook. In a cabinet, I found some good-sized potatoes. Hash browns, perhaps?

I got out some salt and pepper and washed off the potatoes. I was unable to find something suitable to cut them with, so I washed my paws as well, before simply tossing all four spuds in the air and swiping them with my sharp claws, catching the tattered remains of the potatoes neatly in the pan. I threw some onions and the pepper, and some more basil in for good measure. Then, carefully tapping the salt into the browns with one paw, I tended to my omelet with the other. By this time I was whistling a jaunty tune that really had no rhyme or reason to it. I patted down the browns with the spatula and turned around, eager for something else to do.

I hunted through the cabinets again, this time happening upon a bag of flour. I set it on the counter an rummaged about the fridge for the umpteenth time. A carton of milk soon joined the flour, along with some sugar and fruits. Crepes sounded pretty good right about now.

Quick as a flash, I returned to the stove and made my adjustments to the omelet and the browns. I had actually begun a silly little jig at this point to the whimsical tune of my whistling. I was simply happy to be doing something, rather than moping about.

I danced back to the counter and put the flour, along with some eggs, into a mixing bowl and began stirring. I slowly added a little bit of milk and then some water to thin out the batter, and tossed in some butter to thicken it out again when I put in a little too much water. Once the batter was smooth, I took yet another pan off the rack and tossed it onto the stove. I did a quick spin, followed by a few random dance steps, almost dropping the bowl I held in one paw.

Another round of tending to the other foods was accomplished simultaneously as I poured out the mix into the third pan, tilting it around in a circle to coat the bottom evenly. Crepes cooked fast, and if I'd gotten my timing right, everything would finish at the same time.

Seized by a sudden giddiness, I abruptly did another spin and slid across the kitchen floor on my knees, whipping my arm around as I strummed an air guitar. My whistling abruptly changed to a funky blues-rock beat, and I furiously kept pace on my invisible instrument.

I jammed my way back across the kitchen, playing my guitar behind my head. I opened a higher cabinet with my nose and found some plates, which I grabbed in my mouth, unwilling to interrupt the massive riff I'd just launched into. The salt and pepper shaker became my screaming fans, jumping around in joy as I worked my magical claws up and down the fretboard.

For the grand finale, I did another spin, and positioned the plates carefully on the counter. Gotta time this right. I did a superb moonwalk back to the stove, and whipped around, slamming my meaty paws down onto the handles of the three skillets in quick succession. The food in each plate was launched high into the air along with the peak of my music. The crowd was going absolutely nuts. I had this gig in the bag.

The browns, omelet, and crepe, all perfectly cooked, flew across the kitchen, arcing so high that the crepe just barely scraped the ceiling. I gave a final power chord and held one paw in the air, a single glowing claw pointing to the heavens in a stoic salute to the gods of rock'n'roll.

The food landed perfectly on the plates I'd set up, and the hash browns somehow arranged themselves in an artful pile. Perfect. By Odin's chest hair, I'm just the best!

I slid across the floor again, arms wide and head tilted back as my two fans brought the house down. Oh thank you, thank you. No, you're too kind! What? An encore? Why, I suppo-

"What in Celestia's pearly flanks is going on in here?"

Shit.

"...So then I said, 'Oatmeal? Are you crazy!?'"

"Bwa-hahahahahaaa!"

The jolly stallion, who called himself Coconut, whom had walked in on the ending of my epic solo slapped the counter with a hoof, doubled over in laughter. He was a big fellow, an earth pony, and built like a brick wall. His chocolate-brown coat contrasted with his mane, a surprisingly bright blonde, cropped short enough to stand up like a zebra's mohawk. The mark on his flank, a smiley face, whisk, and a rolling pin, set over each other like a skull-and-crossbones, symbolized his talent for cooking... as well as his knack for making a friend.

"Hee-hee, oh, my ribs!" Coconut wiped a tear of laughter from his eyes. "By the sun and the moon, Echo! I'd never have thought that one day I'd be making a breakfast fit for the princesses alongside a mute Diamond Dog who can cook as well as I can! And he has a sense of humor! Ha-ha! My boy, you've made my day- no, my month! C'mere, you!"

He promptly wrapped a forelimb around my neck and gave me a pony version of a noogie. I vainly struggled to release myself from his iron grip, but dammit, earth ponies are strong!

"Air... need. To. Breathe!" I managed to scrawl.

"Whoops! Sorry, mate! Gotta little carried away, there, don'tcha know!." He sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. "It's just this doesn't exactly happen very often, savvy?" His odd accent (a combination of what seemed to be British, American South, and Swedish) made him irresistibly forgivable, and I obliged him with a gentle pat on the head...

...Before wrapping him in a headlock of my own and going to town on his skull. Revenge! Reveeeeeeeenge!

Admittedly, he'd been rather skeptical of me at first. A Diamond Dog who can write, read, cook, and play a mean air guitar? Such a thing he'd found very hard to believe. Eager to make a friend, I'd offered him some of my breakfast. He'd eaten the first few bites tentatively, gingerly, as if he thought I'd put something in them. Then, his pupils had shrunk to pinpricks, and he'd completely abandoned his silverware in his haste to consume.

Man, can this guy eat! Great googly-mooglies, Batman, can he ever! He'd literally inhaled my entire breakfast in one breath. It was gone, just like that.

"Er... sorry about that. Don't rightly know wot came ova me," he'd mumbled through a mouthful of my breakfast. After swallowing, we'd gotten to know each other better, and I soon learned that he was the cook here at the barracks. He'd gotten up to make the rest of the guards breakfast, which by now he was behind schedule on.

Being the gentleman that I am, I volunteered my services most generously - which were surprisingly accepted.

"Anypony who can cook like that is all right in my book," he'd firmly sated. "Don't care if ya got wings and scales, either. We've been understaffed in the kitchen lately, so clear off those pans and let's get cookin'!"

And so, we'd cooked a meal fit for the halls of Asgard itself.

Great, heaping piles of lightly seasoned scrambled eggs! Towers of flapjacks, twenty cakes high! Claw-cut fruit salad that even had those silly little ornamental umbrellas! Mountains of scrumptious pasties, tarts, rolls, donuts, bites, and things I had no name for!

As Princess Luna might say; "'TWAS A GLORIOUS FEAST!"

Coconut deftly pried himself from my lock and staggered away, heartily laughing. "Och, ya rascal. Knock that off, we've got grub ta serve."

Breakfast was served promptly at 6:30, and we had little time left to do so. We lugged the enormous trays of food onto carts and wheeled them out into the central hall. Coconut retrieved some folding tables from a closet, and we commenced in setting up a cafeteria-like layout. No two tables were alike, and all in varying states of disrepair. I assumed that most of the furniture for the barracks was donated from the town itself, as the building had not yet existed long enough to order it's own.

Several early risers, driven from their rooms by the smell of the smorgasbord sitting on the carts, coolly observed us a we worked. They made no offer to assist whatsoever, but at least they didn't give me any dirty looks. Instead, we simply regarded each other from across the hall, both sides regarding their counterpart with a detached interest.

"Don't mind them, Fluffy. They've never seen a Diamond Dog like you before." Coconut gave me a reassuring slap on the shoulder as I bodily lifted four tables at once, two in each claw. Unable to respond, I merely nodded and gave a small shrug. If my reception was cold now, it had been sub-zero last night. That much I was grateful for.

Once all the tables had been set up, my new friend alerted the rest of the guards to the meal simply by banging two pots together as loudly as he could. "COME 'N GET IT, YA LAZY BLIGHTERS!"

The ponies already in the room efficiently formed a line by the cart and began piling on the food. A steady stream of guards spilled out from the southern wing, talking and joking amiably. The level of their volume diminished when they noticed me leaning against a pillar by the food carts alongside Coconut. I could hear a great deal of their conversations, surprisingly. My ears were quite sensitive, and in this somewhat bare hall, the noise carried well.

"...So that's him, huh? Doesn't look that tough..."

"...Right through the gate, I heard. Big enough to fit two carts across..."

"...Tythus must be off his rocker, letting him get away with it so easily..."

"...Repairs are going to begin ASAP, and the Captain wants to address us..."

"...Apparently he can't speak. Talks with his claws, or something like that..."

"...There's been a sighting. This morning, actually. I hope that hole gets patched up quick..."

"...Why's he got that hood? I can barely see his face..."

From what I could gather, none of them here held much against me aside from the destruction of the gate. All were interested in me, though, and once they had sat down at their chosen tables, they often shot a curious glance in my direction. Something struck me as odd, though. They weren't eating anything. Maybe it was some kind of formality, or a custom I hadn't heard of?

"Good morning, everypony." That stern, yet soft voice sounded eerily clearly in my ears. I looked away from the tables to see Captain Tythus striding across the hall from the dormitory, outfitted in a silver, battered version of the Royal Unicorn Guard regalia. Ginger Snap trotted gamely by his side, outfitted in light chain-mail and another variant of the guard armor, minus a helmet. Her head was held low, but her face wasgrim.

This was the first time I could see her clearly, as last night she'd been shrouded in darkness and muck. The mare was a unicorn, with a dusky cinnamon coat and deep, dark red mane that reminded me of the color of a red velvet curtain one finds in large theater stages. She had piercing emerald eyes, and to my surprise, a several thin slashes running up the side of her neck to her jaw. The mark on her flank was of a bright orange mote of fire, which I assumed had something to do with her abrasive personality, or the fact that she acted like a total hothead.

Her eyes met mine briefly, before she scowled and looked away, her head held a fraction of an inch lower. Captain Tythus, however, did not notice this, or chose to ignore it. The silence was thick as the veteran soldier made his way to the carts and piled on a truly enormous load of food, inhaling deeply from the steaming vapors they emitted.

"Ahhhhh... Coconut, you've outdone yourself," he stated as he picked a place to sit at an empty table. His horn sparked to life - a golden hue that reminded me of the setting sun. Silverware magically levitated up to spear a chunk of fruit. He held it up to his eye, as if inspecting a freshly forged weapon. Still, nopony in the room spoke, much less made any movement. Ginger Snap tossed a few things onto a plate held between her teeth and sat down across from him.

"Actually, sir, I had some help today," Coconut said nonchalantly.

Captain Tythus lowered the morsel from his vision and cocked an eyebrow. "Do tell."

Coconut merely jerked his head in my direction, to where I was still leaning against the pillar, arms folded in front of me. Everypony in the room immediately gave me a quick look before disbelievingly examining their plates. Ginger looked as if the food was about to grow teeth and attack her.

I met Tythus' gaze evenly, and was immensely glad that my hood was up. It threw my upper face into shadows, where my eyes and eyebrows were tense with worry.

There was a terrible pause as he studied me, experienced eyes reading me like a book.

The officer finally gave a soft grunt and popped the bite into his mouth. His eyes widened in surprise. "It's good," was all he said.

The effect was immediate. The others quickly followed the example of their captain, and similar expressions of astonishment and culinary satisfaction lit up the room like a Christmas tree. Only the cinnamon mare at his table denied the meal, instead choosing to examine the others' reactions first, as though she thought I'd poisoned the food somehow.

It was as if someone had suddenly flicked a switch; conversations and chatter sprang up once again. Apparently I had passed through the gauntlet unscathed.

I felt a hoof pat me on the shoulder. "You going to eat, or just pose there all day?" Relief suddenly flooded my system and I followed Coconut to the carts, filling up my own plate. He led me to sit at Tythus' table and I sat as close as I could to captain without appearing clingy. It wasn't because I liked him, it was because of the noticeable hostility at the other end of the table.

"So. You can cook," was all Tythus said.

I nodded as I ate, suddenly grateful for no longer having to speak with my mouth. I could use one paw to eat while the other maintained a full level of conversation. "I take it that's rather unheard of for my kind."

"Most Diamond Dogs tend to eat their meals raw. Preferably still moving," Ginger stated evenly, not looking up from where she was still sizing up her breakfast.

"I'm not most Diamond Dogs, am I?" I silently retorted.

Those brilliant green eyes flashed, but she said nothing in reply.

Coconut quickly picked up on the awkward pause. "So, captain, what's on the schedule for today? Are we goin' ta be marchin' up an down the square like usual, or do ye have something interestin' for the lads ta do fer once? And just wonderin', but what are ye gonna do with our furry friend here?"

"I've got something in mind."

For some reason, I didn't like the almost chipper tone of his voice. From my experience, when a superior officer answers a question like that, it usually involves lots of pain and suffering for his underlings.

And as luck would have it, I now fell under that category. Whoop-dee-freakin'-doo.

Breakfast finished swiftly. All the guards were ravenous, and ate with a ferocity I had seen only when I lived in South Africa and witnessed a pride of lions tear into a gazelle. It was a bloodless bloodbath of breakfast! A great genocide of good grub! A mammoth massacre of a magnanimous morning meal! Holy shit those are hard to do!

After the carnage ended and the plates had been cleared away by a few ponies on slop duty, the captain stood at the front of the hall to address us. The guards fell silent instantly, and I was more than impressed. Tythus had only been with them for a few weeks, and yet they had more discipline than I would have ever expected.

The grizzled unicorn politely coughed into a hoof before speaking, even though everypony had already fallen silent.

"Right. We've got a lot of work to do today. Gate repairs are underway as I speak, however, progress is slow. Baritone, take your squad there and assist in any way the carpenters see fit. I don't care if they ask you to stand there and look pretty - just do it.

"Cloud Nine, you are to split the pegasi in half. One group takes the northwest patrol, the other takes the southwest. I trust you'll pick a competent leader for the second group. After you finish your route, gather three clicks past the nest and proceed back to town due east. I want a solid report on how many eggs have hatched. If you have to get close, do it. This knowledge could save lives.

"Sparky! Sparky, where are- ah, hiding in the back again? You're to take another squad down to the depot today. I need you to stockpile all the fireworks for the Summer Sun Festival here in the hall. Put up a barricade so nopony ends up blowing the place up.

"Anypony that I haven't mentioned or isn't picked by the squad leaders is to spend the day on rampart patrol. Keep an eye out for the little ones, they've started coating themselves in mud for camouflage. Ginger Snap and Echo, remain here. That is all. Hop to it, ponies."

Coconut gave me a reassuring glance as he rose form the table, galloping off with the rest of the guards back into the dormitory wing. I assumed they were going to get their gear on and then move out with all due haste. That just left me, the captain, and... Ginger.

"Now then," began the officer. "I've got a plan that may be able to take care of the hydras once and for all. The only problem is, it requires two ponies to pull off correctly. And the only two here capable for the job are you two."

Ginger Snap visibly stiffened, and I could see her jaw clamp down, hard. What did she have against me? Nopony else I had seen this far treated me with such dislike and hostility.

"We've been fighting the hydras the wrong way, Echo. For weeks, we've been singling them out, picking them off. It isn't working. But now that you're here, we can finally change our approach."

Ginger stifled a grimace before speaking up. "What would you have us do, sir?"

"It's not what you'll be doing that's so important. It's what you'll be."

I frowned under my hood. This didn't sound very good for me. "And what exactly are we to become?"

He smiled.

"Bait."

(10) Rolling Over

I absentmindedly scratched a bit of sawdust from my fur as I sat in the waiting room. A nearby magazine lay on a low, ugly table. Curious to gain more knowledge of Equestrian culture, I picked it up. Cosmarepolitan. And it was seven months old. I resisted the urge to laugh... then quickly flipped it open.

No judging. It's in the name of Science!

Wethoof was not large enough to have a proper hospital, but in light of its situation, it had expanded the local doctor's office into a small clinic. It was here where I waited to see Daring Do after a hard day's work.

Captain Tythus, who is quite possibly a bigger troll than Celestia herself, had explained nothing of his plan regarding the role Ginger Snap and I would play against the Hydras. Instead, he'd kicked me out to work on the gate, and taken Ginger with him to meet with the mayor.

The work itself was quite easy for me. My new body was much stronger than my old one, and I found myself lifting heavy piles of lumber to and fro around the work site with almost no effort. The repair crew already there had been rather hostile to me, shooting looks at me that ranged from fear to outright hatred. Luckily for me, the squad of guards I had been sent with reassured them that I would be no trouble. It seems that I'd made a better impression on them than I'd thought, or at least they would treat me with respect while I was in Tythus' good graces. I wouldn't have minded the work or the evil looks from the civilians so much, but one of my escorts from the first night, Popper, stood by and did nothing but watch me the whole time. This reminded me that while I was tolerated, I was not trusted.

We'd finished work at sunset. The gaping hole in the gate had been repaired quite a bit, and the forepony at the site had even given me a muttered word of thanks for speeding up the process significantly. The squad leader, a charcoal unicorn named Baritone, had granted me the rest of the day off, provided I had supervision. Baritone seemed to like me the best there, and had been one of the few ponies at the site who would actually approach me.

I'd then walked here, to the clinic, with Popper keeping pace alongside. He'd seen the damage I'd done while it was still smoking, and he constantly reminded me of his skepticism by remaining on edge, even now as we waited to be let in to Daring's room.

I glanced up from the magazine. He was watching me evenly from across the room, gently tapping his hoof on the chair. I gave him a smile. He winced, and his tapping became rather erratic.

Whoops. Bared my fangs at him.

"So... nice weather we're having?" I tried.

His eyes narrowed. "It's been raining all day."

I shrugged. "I like the rain."

He grunted and said nothing else. Discouraged, I looked around the waiting room again. Tacky wallpaper, a cheesy song playing from somewhere that suspiciously sounded like elevator music... yeah, I might as well have been on Earth.

I flipped over a few more pages in the magazine. A colorful article caught my attention. How to Please Your Stallion in 10 Exciting Ways! Whoa. They even had diagrams. Wait... what's this...

My eyes widened in horror as I saw number three.

The magazine made a loud smack as it hit the wall on the opposite side of the room. Popper jumped up out of his chair, eyes wide, tensed for action.

"What? What is it!?"

I pointed to the offending garbage on the floor and shuddered. "Number three."

He sighed, and returned to his chair, somewhat annoyed by the disturbance.

The awkward silence resumed. I clicked my tongue in boredom. Popper's ears flicked back to his head at the noise, then slowly adjusted themselves again. Interesting...

Click.

Again, the pegasi's ears twitched.

Click.

Popper shot me a look that said indicated restrained temper.

I returned his expression by giving him a small, friendly wave across the room, at which he scowled.

Click.

His eye twitched involuntarily. I resisted the urge to begin shaking with laughter. This was priceless!

Click.

Click.

Click.

Popper narrowed his eyes at me. "If you do that one more time, I swear I'm going to-"

Click.

"Seriously, knock that-"

Click.

"You're enjoying, this aren't you."

CLICK-CLICK-CLICK-CLICK-CLICK-CLICK-CLICK!

The irritated pegasus slumped down into his chair and covered his ears with his wings. He punctuated his frustration with a barely concealed groan.

I knew when to stop. Everyone has a limit, and I'd no intention of really pissing him off. Even though he didn't trust me, that didn't mean I couldn't try and interact as if nothing were amiss. I twiddled my thumbs, and entertained myself with drawing pictures in the air. I was mid-way through a realistic representation of myself riding an armored Tyrannosaurus Rex, which was surfing though the stars on top of a giant rocket ship that was participating in a space battle against the Galactic Empire when I heard my name being called.

"Mr. Echo? Right this... Oh, my."

I turned to find a blindingly white mare standing in the entrance to the waiting room, looking at me with a confused expression on her face. I assumed she worked here as a nurse or something.

I stood up, easily towering over her. "Problem, miss?"

She looked completely flabbergasted. "I-I... Uh... You're..."

I activated my patented "Act Like A Gentleman" mode. "A Diamond Dog, madam? Ah, I'm only too aware of that, as well as the stigma it regrettably seems to bring. I only get reminded of that fact on a regular basis, you see. Now, I believe my adventurous companion, for whom I have gone to great lengths to instate into your care, is due for a visit. Would it be acceptable for my escort to wait here? I shan't be too long."

Vegeta, what's the scouter say about his sophistication level?

"I DO DECLARE, IT'S EXCEEDED NINE THOUSAAAAAAND!"

Indeed.

The mare stammered some more before finally just giving her head a simple shake, giving up any attempt at trying to rationalize the situation. "Right this way, please." I gave a simple two-finger salute to Popper, who looked rather relieved that I'd be out of his mane for a while. I ambled along at her side, arms clasped behind my back.

We passed through a newly constructed hallway, the tiled floor cool on my paws. I could smell the familiar scent of fresh paint. It was interesting to note how well these ponies adapted to change. A few weeks ago, this had been a regular village. But the mare trotting by my side seemed quite at ease, or at least as at ease as she could be in my presence.

"Nice weather we've been having."

She shot me a quizzical look, eyeing the floating characters with half-interest, half-wonder. "It's been raining all day."

"I like the rain. It's a peculiarity I've had for as long as I can remember. The worse the weather, the better I feel." And, due to the constant tropical drizzle, I was feeling rather chipper.

"That's... interesting?"

"Indeed it is, madame. Indeed it is." I whistled the tune from Singin' In the Rain as softly as I could.

Perhaps it's just a quirk of mine, but I'd always loved extreme weather. Serious thunderstorm? No problem! I'd be sitting on my front stoop with a bowl of popcorn, watching the lightning. Punishing blizzard? Bitch, please! I'd be making snow angles in the street while nobody dared drive. Gale-force winds? Excellent! I can try out my home-made wingsuit off the roof now!

I know. I'm weird like that.

We rounded a corner, passing underneath a flickering light. A few doors down on the left, the mare stopped and opened up a room, and waved me in. I made an elegant bow, before proceeding through.

There were no lights on; rather, the single occupant had elected to simply open up the shades and let in the ambient light from the overcast skies. Daring Do was sitting up in the bed, wearing a hospital gown for some reason. Why was she wearing that? Didn't ponies usually go around in the buff anyway?

Daring immediately perked up from where she'd been looking out of the window, her smile lit up the room quite a bit.

"Well hey there, Fuzzball! Heard you got yourself into a bit of trouble getting me here, huh? Thanks for that, by the way. I guess we're even again."

Ah yes, it was good to have her back. Anypony else that called me that was cruising for a bruising.

I pulled up a chair from the wall and sat by her bedside, leaning back to brush a few more flakes of sawdust from my fur. "If by trouble, you mean I've been unofficially drafted into the town guard to fight of an entire nest of Hydras, pissed off a lot of ponies, and burned a massive hole in the only defense they have... then yes. I'm in a bit of trouble."

Daring sheepishly rubbed the back of her neck. "Maybe I should have told you a little about this place, huh?"

"Probably."

"Sorry. It's just..." She waved a hoof around. "I didn't really think we'd be here for a while yet. After the Temple of Chaos, we were going to hit up all the other places I've not been able to get at. But it's probably for the best that we're here now. I was getting tired of the rainforest anyway."

I blew a sigh of air out of my nose. "I know. In return for teaching me how to read and write. By the way, I'm getting quite a few looks for that."

"Or maybe it's the whole 'glowing claws of death' thing you've got going on there?" A disembodied, but all-too-familiar voice said. "By the way, I was most impressed with the way you lit them on fire. I'd no idea that was even possible." Daring and I abruptly began looking around for the source.

"Up here, silly-fillies."

We looked up, and there, reclining upside down on the ceiling in a lawn chair, while sipping a glass of chocolate milk (which was also defying physics) was the familiar figure of a half-grown draconequus. He winked at us.

"My, my, both of you would be positively horrid at finding Waldo," said Disarray.

I stood up, and pointed an accusing finger at him. "For your information, he's very hard to spot sometimes! And furthermore, where were you when I was stuck outside the gate? You could have gotten me in!"

"Wait, who's Waldo?" Daring scratched her forehead, confused.

"Where is he, you mean."

"Just answer the question!"

He gave a huff and drank the glass containing the milk, before tapping a lobster claw against the remaining solid beverage and tossing it outside an open window. There was a small flash of light an a muffled explosion as it blew up on impact somewhere outside. "Did I not say I'd be of assistance when you need me, not when it's just convenient for me to open a door? You didn't need me then, otherwise you'd still be outside, scratching at the door."

Damn. He had a point. I sat back down, hard.

"Good dog. Now, I believe we have a rather tricky matter on our paws."

"Don't you mean hooves?" asked Daring.

"Not in our case." I wiggled my fingers around. Thumbs for the win!

"Quite." Disarray stroked his multi-hued mustache thoughtfully. "Anyway. Our canine friend here has gotten himself into a barrel here, and not the ones with arrows on them that spin around and shoot you right back out."

Daring was once again lost in the dust. "I assume those are the good kind of barrel?"

"Depends on whether or not you're a gorilla wearing a tie."

"Oooookay?"

Disarray gave a polite cough. "Ahem. Anyway. Echo, what exactly are you going to be doing about this? A hydra alone is a formidable threat, but a whole nest of them? This town may have walls, but once those little buggers grow up, it's game over for everypony."

"What do you mean?"

"Over one-hundred fully grown hydras are more than capable of knocking this wall down. What I mean is that you're going to have to solve this problem, and fast."

"I don't know. I have little knowledge of hydras, but I'll assume the basics. 'Dont cut their heads off' is probably the most I can offer."

Daring Do nodded. "Hydras are bad news if that happens. It's bad enough they have four heads, but more than that? Ridiculous."

I looked at her, somewhat confused. "You have experience with them?"

She nodded again, and stretched her bandaged wing a little. "Quite a few years ago, I was investigating a possible dig site in Froggy Bottom Bog. Two of the biggest hydras you'll ever see rose out of the mud and chased me halfway to Canterlot. I actually ended up killing one, although it was by accident."

Froggy Bottom Bog? That meant the hydra that went after the Elements of Harmony was the survivor of the encounter with the intrepid explorer. Interesting.

"How did you manage to kill it?"

Her face went grim. "Buried it in a rockslide. It wasn't pretty."

Hmmm... So if one wishes to take down a hydra, don't even bother with the heads, just damage the body. Well, I think it's safe to say I've learned something today.

I thought for a moment. "Captain Tythus apparently has a plan to wipe them out once and for all. He didn't say what it was, though, outside of the fact that Ginger Snap and myself are required to make it work. As bait."

Disarray chuckled from his physics-defying position on the ceiling. "Ha! Well, you're completely bucked, then."

I glared at him. "Don't remind me. It's bad enough that I might die very shortly, but I have to do it alongside a mare that hates my guts and will probably kill me before the hydras do."

"Wait, Ginger Snap?" mused Daring. "But the Snap family hates Diamond Dogs..."

"I've noticed. She almost killed you simply to deny me entry to Wethoof. What's up with that, anyway? A lot of ponies around here seem to really dislike us."

Daring Do looked down solemly at at her covers. "Long before I came to the Great Southern Rainforest, the local pack of Diamond Dogs kidnapped Ginger's mother and forced her into slavery digging up gems for them in their den. The town raised a militia - tried to get her back, but... she was killed in the resulting battle below ground. From what I've heard, the incident had quite an impact on Wethoof."

"Wait, there's a local pack of Diamond Dogs?"

"There was a pack. The Greenclaw Pack. But you won't find them around anymore," stated Disarray, who genuinely looked troubled about it. "I saw the whole thing from my prison. It was terrible."

"What... What happened to them?"

"The mayor went mad with grief. Slaughtered them all."

"Disarray!"

"What? It's true. You know very well what happened. The smoke could be seen for miles in any direction. The news even reached Stalliongrad, so I'm told."

"Wait-wait-wait. Why did the mayor go crazy? Is this the same one who outlawed my kind from Wethoof?"

"Aye," said the draconequus.

"Mayor Frost Snap is Ginger's father."

Well, shit! This explains a lot. Now I can see where all this hate is coming from. No wonder Ginger didn't let me in the gate. This Mayor Frost Snap probably wanted to kill me where I sat, and I was willing to bet money that it was only because of Captain Tythus that I hadn't been skinned and mounted over the Snap family fireplace.

I suddenly felt a twinge of gratitude to the grizzled officer. He'd said that he was going to speak with the mayor earlier that day - no doubt about my presence in town.

We didn't say much after that. Pleasantries were exchanged, and I soon learned that Daring Do would be released from the hospital in a few days. After that, she was free to leave whenever she wished. I, on the other paw, was not. The adventuring mare insisted she'd be staying here in the meantime, though, regardless of the hydra problem.

"That's what friends are for; to support each other when they need it," she'd said, and that was that.

Disarray had once again vanished, and neither of us knew where he'd gone. The only evidence of him ever being in the room was the small, smoldering crater outside the clinic, where he'd tossed his explosive chocolate milk.

And so, I'd made my way back through town to the barracks, Popper once again by my side.

As we walked through Wethoof, I have to admit that I was very impressed with what I saw. The town was unlike anything I'd seen in the show. The entire settlement was built on a series of round, raised platforms a few feet off the ground. Small bridges and walkways connected them all together like a giant group of wooden lilly pads. From what I could gather, the town had been built in a shallow depression, so the elevation was probably to avoid the flash flooding that rainforest storms were known for bringing.

Halfway though town, the constant drizzle that'd been gently pattering down all day suddenly increased in strength. Instead of a gentle shower, buckets began pouring down.

"Step on it. The weather team's scheduled a big storm on Tythus' orders," said Popper.

I peered up into the clouds, and sure enough, I picked out the shapes of a few of the civilian pegasi, bucking the thick, dark cover to make it rain. Intrigued, I made a mental note to begin looking into how they did that. Maybe it was magic, or something else entirely.

I obliged my surly shadow and double-timed it back to the barracks on all fours. Surprisingly, I outdistanced him by a large margin. When he caught up to me, I was leaning nonchalantly by the front door, my hood down and my face angled up to the rain. It felt refreshing to have the warm, wet drops soak my fur through, and I didn't mind it in the slightest.

I held the door open for the sopping wet pegasus, and he grunted an obligatory thanks. The cavernous dining hall was now chock full of the entire Wethoof Guard, in the midst of various activities. A group of pegasi were busy removing soaking wet armor by the fireplace on the far end of the hall, and one of them was busy giving a report to Captain Tythus, who looked rather grim. I assumed this to be the scouting group he'd sent out earlier that day - judging by the clenching jaw, the news he was receiving wasn't favorable.

I heard a voice call my name. I pricked my ears, seeking the source. It came from a circle of couches and haphazardly scattered chairs that I judged to act as a sort of common room, or a place for the off duty guardsponies to relax. Sure enough, there was a moderate group there, and a familiar big brown stallion removed himself from a comfortable looking couch and trotted over.

"Allo!" Coconut said brightly. "Come wit me, mate. We'll dry ye off by the fire and getcha somethin' warm ta drink. Any preferences?" He clapped a hoof on my back, making a very wet smacking noise akin to slamming a raw steak onto a counter top.

"You wouldn't happen to have any cider from Sweet Apple Acres, would you?"

He grinned. "I reckon that we've got a keg left. They made a huge amount this year, so I'm told. Somethin' ta do with a competition or the like. Ye want it hot?"

"So help you Celestia, if it isn't hot, I'll eat your limbs," I joked.

Coconut flinched back suddenly. "Ye... Ye wouldn't really do that, would ye?"

"You wouldn't really serve me cold apple cider on a day like this, would you?"

The stallion gave me a hard stare for a moment, then promptly burst out laughing. "Ha ha! Good one, mate! Ye really had me goin' there fer a second! I'll getcha yer cider, just plop done by the fire an' warm yer rump." He gave me a wink and trotted off to the kitchens.

I shook some water from my coat and padded softly across the hall to the fire. Again, I was somewhat disturbed by the attention I was getting. Quite a few of the guards looked up from their various activities, and, while nowhere near as hostile as the townsfolk, still regarded me with some suspicion. I felt almost like an animal at the circus, doing tricks for treats and to avoid the lash of a whip.

The fire was roaring hot, at least. I plopped myself down onto my haunches, back to the inferno. I removed my tattered sweatshirt and laid it on the fireplace to dry off, while the sopping fur on my body began to steam from the sudden evaporation. The surrounding pegasi patrol gave me a brief nod before carrying on with their disarmament, removing their metal curiasses and seemingly Roman-style helmets. Their armor was patchy, a dull grey, freshly forged, and lacked none of the ornamentation I'd seen on the Royal Guard regalia. In fact, Tythus was the only pony in the building who owned a suit of armor that didn't seem haphazardly slapped together.

I eyed the unicorn officer from my spot by the fire. His gear was a darker grey, polished, but covered in countless nicks and dents that indicated he'd seen more than his fare share of action. A gleaming golden sun, almost the same color as his coat, reflected the firelight from it's position on his chest. His feathered helmet crest had two streaks of white shot through it. Maybe it was some kind of ranking system, or a badge of honor?

He noticed me sizing him up, and strode over to me, surprisingly taking a seat by my side. A few of the nearby guards gave us funny looks, but besides that they minded their own business.

"You've got the eyes of a soldier," the stallion said simply. He wasn't looking at me, rather, he was looking at his little army, scattered around the hall, laughing and relaxing with their time off.

"I served some time, yes."

He grunted. "Oh? Wasn't aware that the Diamond Dogs had militarized."

"Who said anything about serving with them, sir?"

Tythus gave me a queer look. I was getting a lot of those, lately. "If not them, than who?"

I shrugged. Half the truth is better than none of the truth, as they say. "Monkeys, sir. Tall, bipedal, hairless, tailess monkeys."

He gave out a harsh bark of laughter, then realized I was completely serious. "Where did you say you were from?"

Uh oh! Think fast, man! Code Red!

I paused, and pieced together a reasonable alibi. The more vague, the better. "Very, very far away. A different land, if you will. This is why I'm such an oddity to you ponies. My kind are quite different from Equestrian Diamond Dogs. " Well, technically, I wasn't lying. Applejack would be proud.

Another grunt. "Huh. No kidding. So if you're from so far away, why are you here?"

"In Wethoof? That would be becuase of the gate incident, sir."

"No, in Equestria."

I thought for a moment. I was here because the avatar of chaos and disharmony had penalty-kicked me across the dimensional divide to be his greatest practical joke. But... I didn't have to be in Equestria. I could go wherever I wanted. There were nations beyond its borders, this much I knew. As far as I knew, I was on an entirely new planet. Oceans, continents, mountain ranges, the whole nine yards. But why was I here? Then, it hit me.

"Knowledge."

Captain Tythus sighed a bit, and leaned back towards the fire. "An admirable goal. Were I a younger colt, I might have undertaken such a quest myself, had I not been so hotheaded and joined the guard."

I had a question that had been burning in my mind since we first met, and I felt this was a good time to ask it.

"Captain, why are you so tolerant of me?"

"I believe in judgment based from actions." He gently tapped a hoof a few times against the floor. "You may have endangered the lives of these ponies, but you've been willing to work to right that wrong, and have been nothing but respectful to us despite the bias this town has against you. You've earned my respect, Echo. Don't lose it."

And with that, the golden stallion heaved himself up to his hooves, and slowly trotted away to another group of pegasi that had just come in from the storm.

"Well, looks like you've made a good impression." Coconut popped up at my side, two steins of a frothing, amber liquid inside. He hoofed one over to me, and I delicately swallowed it up in my paw. I inhaled the steaming beverage deeply. It smelled of tangy, inciting, succulent, sweet apples, unlike anything I'd ever experienced before. It wasn't just due to my enhanced sense of smell, either. This actually smelled like happiness.

I took a small sip. The ambrosia melted down my throat, tickling and burning and soothing all at once. It hit my belly, and I felt a warm glow emit form my very core. I felt like singing and dancing and falling asleep at the same time, the world suddenly becoming much friendlier.

Whoa. This stuff is like crack! This could be dangerous. Maybe I shouldn't have any more...

Buck it. I took a massive gulp. Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh... fit for the gods!

"That's some good cider."

Coconut took a swig from his own stein, letting out a contented sigh. "Too right. Sweet Apple Acres makes every batch better than the last one. It never gets old."

I took another long look around the hall. Suddenly, it didn't seem so intimidating with a hot drink in paw, and a new friend by my side. I was filled with a burst of childlike wonder as I watched the guardsponies lounge around, telling stories, joking, playing cards, or simply napping in the corner.

"You're right. It never gets old."

(11) Hunting Tactics

"... That's it! You've got him, captain! Throw him over!"

Whumph!

I found myself slammed bodily into the ground for what had to be the tenth time that day. An unarmored Tythus stood over me, panting hard, sweat making his light mane hang limply. Steel gray eyes glimmered in the sunlight, regarding me with about as much expression as a blank piece of paper. "Had enough?" The surrounding circle of ponies were cheering and stomping their hooves, egging us on.

I responded by surging back to all fours and taking off from the dirt like a furry rocket, cracking his jaw back with a ferocious headbutt. The officer reeled backwards, before quickly rolling to his side as I roared past him, missing him by inches.

We spun around, and faced off, each crouching low and breathing heavily, sweat and dirt matting our coats. The dust raised up from the fight swirled around our legs and I whipped my tail to and fro to clear it away.

He charged forward, head lowered so that his horn pointed out like a spear. I lunged to the side, feeling the rush of wind that followed. He overshot me, but with a speed that was somewhat frightening, he wheeled around and accelerated to full speed. This time, I met his charge with both paws raised, catching him by the sides of his head. The sheer force of his momentum made me slide backwards several feet, my rear claws scoring deep furrows in the ground. I violently twisted my grip, and with a mighty heave, sent him spinning through the end over end through the air. He was suddenly swallowed in a soft golden aura, and his flight was magically halted as he landed neatly on all four hooves.

Tythus nodded and gave a frighteningly perky smile. "Excellent. You're quick on your paws, even though you're substantially bigger than I am. I admit, I haven't had an opponent like you for years, now. That headbutt actually took me by surprise!" He laughed, and it sent a shiver or two done my spine. "Now, you've gotten a taste for a seasoned earth pony guard, but what if I throw magic into the mix? Can you handle a skilled wielder of the arcane?"

Shit.

The captain's golden horn suddenly flashed like a paparazzi camera. The light burned my eyes and I quickly closed them, shaking my head in frustration. A concussion of hot force abruptly impacted on my side, sending me tumbling through the air to once again slam into the ground.

I rolled with the impact and quickly regained my footing, spots dancing through my vision. There was another flash, but this time I was ready. I instinctively ducked backwards, tail tucked between my legs, and felt the heat from another hot blast pass over the top of my head. The sudden noise of hoofsteps thundering toward me was all the warning I got as a muscular body rammed be straight in the gut, flipping me over and right into the dirt. I twisted to my right, and felt the impacts of two hooves striking the ground where my head had been a mere second before. I kept rolling, and pushed off the ground with my powerful arms, the force carrying me several feet away, where I managed to land on all fours.

With some distance regained, I have precious few seconds to think. I was blinded, but I had other senses I could take advantage of now, thanks to my new body. I saw another flash through my closed eyelids. I had to change tactics; I'd gotten lucky with that last dodge. I pricked my ears up and listened as hard as I could. The sound of quickly approaching hooves came from my left. I tensed and pinpointed his position with my sensitive hearing. There!

I sprang straight up, as high as I could, and came back down like a thunderbolt, blindly landing on something solid, crushing it into the dust with a superb flying elbow. I quickly pinned him down, and held him firm, despite his mighty struggling. Another flash - I could actually feel the heat on my body from the proximity to his horn - but his efforts were in vain.

The pony beneath me suddenly stopped struggling, giving an exhausted grunt. "Hah... hah... good job... now let me up."

I moved off him, still blind. I sat back down on my haunches, savoring the feeling of my strained muscles and a well earned victory.

I felt a hoof clap me on my shoulder. "Don't worry, you'll get your sight back in a minute or so." His voice became fainter; he had turned away from me. "Now, did you notice the tactics I used, everypony?"

"He has a higher center of gravity than you, sir, so you hit him low."

"Distraction and diversion?"

"Using your greater speed to your advantage, sir."

The voices of the assembled guards blended together as they voiced their opinions and comments. I dared open my eyes, and found the world blurred and foggy. That magic the captain had used certainly packed a punch. With a roll of my shoulders, I stood back up to full height, slightly dazed.

A few days had passed since I had first gone to see Daring at the clinic. My time at the barracks had begun to take a turn for greener pastures; by now, most of the guards either paid me no mind or were actually friendly to me. Once they'd gotten used to my presence and gotten to know me, I was treated quite well - almost like a sort of mascot.

Apparently, however, that didn't exempt me from the rigors of military life. I was on their roster; the only one who hadn't volunteered. That meant I rose with the sun, did what was asked of me, and damn well thanked whoever told me to do it. Today, for example, Tythus was going over the basics of fighting a larger opponent in preparation for a hydra attack. As I was now the largest thing being in town (Coconut had held this title formerly), towering at least two feet over even the tallest of the stallions, that meant I was part of the demonstration.

Tythus utilized his years of experience in the Royal Guard (on top of a startling tendency to bounce back from anything I gave him; probably something to do with his cutie mark: a shield with a red cross) to pound me into the dust at least a dozen times before I'd finally managed to pin him. And he'd been holding, back, too. I now had a healthy respect for Princess Celestia's personal protectors; they knew what they were doing. And if the rumors were true, Princess Luna's bodyguards, the magically enhanced Centurions, were even more dangerous, albeit much less numerous.

Yes, things were looking up here, all right. Only the citizens of Wethoof still treated me poorly, but then again, I hadn't been spending almost every waking moment in their company. And then again... there was still Ginger to put up with. She and the few ponies here who still didn't like me very much took every opportunity to put me down.

"You don't belong here, mutt..."

"Ew! I think he gave me fleas!"

"Go back to whatever stinking pit you crawled out of."

Such were the words I often heard from them, sometimes whispered, sometimes stated as loudly as possible. All, however, spoken without the presence of their commanding officer.

Ginger, however, never said a bad word to me. The cinnamon mare instead elected to paralyze me with her fierce emerald eyes. All the words she left unsaid could be seen in her gaze. She didn't find me revolting. She wasn't angered by my presence. She didn't even find me offensive. No. This was something else entirely, something that cut me deeply. I could see it written all over her, every time I came into sight. Hell, I could even smell it on her!

To put it simply, deep down, she feared me.

Diamond Dogs, as I had gathered from asking around and from the show, had a somewhat defective moral compass, or at least they held different ones from ponies. Unlike them, however, I was different.

I was an unknown, an oddity. Had I acted more like a native Equestrian Diamond Dog, she probably wouldn't have felt this way. She knew what to expect from them, as the stereotypes against my kind did have much merit. But me? No, I acted more like a pony than anything. To her, I was unpredictable. I was the monster under the bed, the bump in the night, the scratching of a tree-branch on the windows. And for that, she hated me, as well. She hated me because I frightened her.

This, above all other things that I had been through already, shook me to my core. I did nothing in retaliation to the taunts and jeers, the subtle rudeness and the open discrimination. And yet, because of that, because I acted in a way that wasn't normal, I was tormented further. It was maddening. But there was nothing I could do but sit out the storm. Eventually, they would accept me. Time changes perspective, and perspective is the key to everything.

I sighed and blinked rapidly as I cleared my vision. The dusty, packed earth of the training ground behind the barracks came into focus, as well as the group of guards being trained today. It was with some satisfaction that I recalled that a few of them had been cheering for me during the demonstration. I smirked despite myself. I had obviously given the captain a run for his bits; that's for sure.

I retrieved my tattered sweatshirt from where I'd tossed it on the ground, brushing off the dust that had accumulated on it, tossed up from the fight. Tythus was now in the midst of demonstrating the proper technique of a low, swiping kick that knocked the legs out from under an opponent. I leaned back against the barracks wall, my aching muscles screeching in protest.

A pegasus suddenly alighted in the middle of the training ground, breathing hard. She wore a satchel over one side, and I instantly recognized her as a mailmare. Sadly, she wasn't the adorable cross-eyed klutz we've come to know and love. Nevertheless, judging by the circle that had gathered around her, she was causing quite a bit of commotion. I heaved myself off the wall and strode over, curious as to what was going on.

"... letter for Captain Tythus, commanding officer of the Wethoof Garrison!" the mare was calling, straining to be heard over the gathered ponies.

The veteran shouldered his way out of the circle, and stood before her, throwing a sharp, quick salute. The mailmare bent down and retrieved a single sealed scroll from her bag. A multicolored wax stamp, emblazoned with a crest I couldn't make out, proudly adorned the document. A murmur went around the crowd. Tythus took a step forward and pressed the tip of his horn to the seal, which began to glow a soft white hue, before vanishing. The scroll unfolded slightly, and Tythus took it from her grasp in a telekinetic aura.

Interesting. That looked like a sort of magical identification spell. Is it possible that ponies have unique magical auras, similar to human fingerprints and retinas?

"Straight from Canterlot, sir. Sorry about the delay, but there was a massive chocolate rainstorm blocking the flight paths until a few days ago. The last of Discord's work." The mailmare returned his salute, and quickly snapped her wings down, speeding off into the sky, on a northwesterly course.

A few of the ponies watched her go, but most were glued onto Tythus, who had unrolled the letter and was busy scanning the contents. His steely eyes suddenly lit up in a completely alien expression of joy.

"They did it! Discord's been defeated!" he cried.

The gathered guards sent out a deafening cheer, some actually hugging each other in glee. I silently laughed despite myself. I'd known this would happen, but this was the first time that the ponies here knew of it. I found Coconut suddenly next to me, a stupidly happy grin on his face. He offered up a chocolate hoof, and I gave him a smug fist-bump.

"Hold up, hold up. There's more." Tythus pursed his lips as he continued reading. "Well well well! Listen to this! 'Your request for additional reinforcements to the beleaguered settlement of Wethoof has been approved to deal with the local Hydra infestation. You are given full command and responsibility over the incoming forces upon their arrival, which are detailed below... signed, Princess Celestia!"

That put everypony from ecstatic to absolutely bananas. Wild cries, punctuated with whoops and hollers of joy filled the air. A few even took off their rugged helmets and tossed them up in the air, like at a college graduation. The atmosphere was intoxicating, and it was as if a veil had been lifted I hadn't noticed before. I'd only seen these faces with the threat of danger hanging in the air, but now? With the promise of salvation on the horizon, it was like looking at completely different ponies.

Tythus gave a low whistle as he continued reading. The look in his eyes went from completely neutral to utterly diabolical.

"Ginger Snap! Echo! Baritone! Sparky! Come with me!" he suddenly barked. "Cloud Nine, organize a light skywatch for the day, then join me in my quarters. Keep the shifts small. The rest of you... enjoy yourselves. Spread the word to the village."

The crowd rapidly dispersed towards the town, with the exception of a few pegasi that Cloud Nine had chosen for watch, who vaulted off into the sky. The ponies that Tythus had called remained. Myself, Ginger, and the three others, who acted sort of like lieutenants for their respective species in the guard. Baritone; a charcoal earth pony stallion with a namesake deep voice. Sparky; an electric yellow unicorn mare who had a visible twitch and a stutter. And finally, Cloud Nine; a very pale pink pegasus mare with soft, downy wings and a surprisingly feisty personality.

We quickly followed the captain into the barracks, as he was trotting at a swift pace. Was that a spring in his step I saw? Regardless, that probably didn't bode well for us. I exchanged a glance with Baritone while we walked. He shrugged, indicating that he had about as much of an idea of what was going to happen as I did. He was the pony I was on the best terms with here, and outside of Coconut he was also the most friendly to me. The others, outside of Ginger, were indifferent.

Proceeding across the main hall, we entered the south wing and went down to the very end of the dormitory, where the captain had his room. I had never been in there before, and was curious to see what it was like. You can tell a lot about a person based on how they keep their possessions. We passed through the threshold of his door, as he held it open.

The room greatly resembled an office. A large desk, strewn with maps of the region and official-looking papers, took up the center of the room. A small cot filled a corner, and a opposite it was a mannequin of a pony, wearing Tythus' battered, but polished, silver armor.

We stood in front of the desk, and the captain walked around it to face us. He took a somewhat shaky breath before laying the scroll on his desk.

"Let me be perfectly frank with you all. We aren't out of this yet - not by a long shot. If anything, the incoming troops are only going to accelerate us towards a possible destruction." He paused and opened a drawer to his desk. "In light of this, I have decided that some changes are in order. Baritone, Sparky, Cloud Nine, step forward."

The three ponies did as asked, coming right up to the desk. Ginger and myself stood a few paces backwards. I tried very hard to stay perfectly still, conscious of the sidelong look she was give me.

Tythus laid three shining medals on the desk, each in the shape of a golden horseshoe entwined with ivy. "By the power invested by my rank, I Captain Tythus, commanding officer of Wethoof, former member of the Sun's Watch, declare each of you three equally deserving of this promotion." He picked up the medals with a soft glow and presented them to the three. "Take these and be recognized for your service to the Crown as Sergeants of the Equestrian Guard."

The three solemnly nodded and received their medals. Murmuring their thanks, they each struck a salute, which the captain returned, before stepping backwards. Tythus nodded. "Good. Now that that's out of the way, we can finally begin preparations for the extermination."

I cocked an eyebrow. 'Bout damn time he told me what the hell he was hiding up his sleeve!

Tythus strode over to the far wall and pulled down one of those roll-up maps, this one of decent representation of Wethoof and the surrounding area, with the recent alterations to the land accounted for. "Sparky, what's the status on the Summer Sun Festival fireworks? Have they been stockpiled yet?"

The jumpy mare twitched a little. "Aye, sir. W-w-we've got the depot st-t-tocked to the brim."

"Excellent. Tomorrow, you're to remove all the explosives in the fireworks. Have a fire crew on standby in case any of the magical charges detonate. Condense the charges and combine them into three separate clusters, then pack each one into a barrel. Set up a fuse system, while you're at it. There's an earth pony in town - Star Burst, I think she's called. She runs the pyrotechnics in the festival. Ask her for help."

"Y-y-yes, sir!"

"Now... Cloud Nine, has the cloud cover been sufficiently stabilized for the catapults yet?"

Cloud Nine proudly smirked. "Four sections have been stomped out, sir. Fifth one's almost ready. They'll take the weight just fine, and we can still move 'em around easy enough."

Tythus gave a curt grunt of acknowledgement, before turning to Baritone. "How have the repairs on the gate progressed?"

"Still a bit rickety, but it'll last." The deep-voiced earth pony looked worried, however. "But I wouldn't put bits on it to take a direct hit, though. The wood might splinter."

"Pray that doesn't happen, then. What of the catapults? They were in atrocious condition when we found them."

"Fully restored, sir. We test fired each one yesterday."

Catapults? Mobile weapons platforms? Magical bombs? Sweet baby Jesus in the manger, this guy is planning something huge! I was suddenly incredibly nervous, the walls seemed to close in around me.

Tythus then turned to Ginger and I; the first time he'd addressed us so far. "These three have been working hard to set the trap up, but you two are going to be the ones who help spring it."

I raised a somewhat shaky paw. "What exactly is the trap, sir?"

The captain took the hanging map down from the wall and smoothed it out on the table. He pointed to a circle, drawn in red, that was positioned over a patch of swamp a few miles from the town, outside of the ring of devastation wrought by the felling of the forest. "This is the location of the Hydra nest," he explained. "Reports put their numbers between one hundred and one-hundred twenty, two fully grown, the rest offspring. The surrounding territory has been completely exhausted of their natural prey by now, and that means they're going to move out soon. I'd say a week or two. If that happens, they'll spread across the entire region. We cannot allow that to happen. These aren't normal hydras; they're hyper-aggressive, and my guess is that Discord's magic warped them somehow. They'd absolutely annihilate the fragile ecosystem of the Great Southern Forest, and spread far beyond this place once they do.

"So, we're going to stop them here." He pointed a hoof to a spot a short distance from the western wall of the town. A small X had been drawn there, with two other X's on either side of it, mimicking the layout of the wall. He poked each one with a hoof. "The three magical charges I mentioned before will be placed here, here, and here. The catapults, stationed around the area on clouds, will pin the hydras against the wall, trapping them between a rock and a hard place. Simply put, the combination of the catapults, weapons fired down from the wall, and the charges, will leave nothing of them but a smoking crater. The incoming reinforcements will cover the flanks on either side of the open ground, and make sure that none of the hydras slip away."

The plan was remarkably ingenious. Using the only physical feature of the landscape for miles in any direction, the towering wall of Wethoof, and the improvised weapons, the hydras would be crushed between the two like a hot ingot being hammered on an anvil. There was, however, just one problem.

"How are we going to get them here, though?" I asked him.

Surprisingly, Ginger Snap answered my question. "Hydras like heat, mutt. They're cold blooded. That's why they live in the swamp. It's warm in there. If you had an ounce of common sense, you'd know that!" she barked.

Tythus fixed her with a glare that could shatter solid rock. She instantly fell silent. "Ginger is correct, Echo. Hydras are drawn to heat like moths to a candle. And it's just your luck that you and her are able to produce that in abundance. Ginger is an excellent caster of fire magic, and you somehow managed to literally burn a hole through our gate.

"Your role in all of this is simple. Both of you, working together, will be able to generate enough heat to lure the hydras out of their swamp. All you have to do is lure them back to the trap, and we'll take care of the rest. When you get there, we'll have some fuel for you to light up a bonfire. When that's lit, you'll be airlifted up to the wall and help with the defense. And once this is all over, Echo, you'll be free to go."

So that was it, then. He just needed my fire-claws. I could roll with this. All I had to do was put up with Ginger's foul bitching for a while. Easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy.

The captain ran over the plan again, this time including the newly promoted sergeants. Baritone would be in charge of the wall, while Sparky and Cloud Nine worked together on the mobile catapults. Tythus himself would be commanding the ground troops holding the hydras together. He drilled us on our duties, and once he was satisfied we knew the plan backwards and forwards, he dismissed us.

Ginger immediately shoved her way past me to get out, although it was about as effective as a six-year-old trying to push a truck. I held the door open for the others, and was about to leave when I heard Tythus call me.

"Hold up."

He trotted out from behind his desk. "I'd just like to know one thing before you go. Never before have I encountered somepony like yourself, Echo. You act differently from ponies and Diamond Dogs alike. When Ginger spat at you like that, you didn't even blink. This isn't the first of these instances - I've been watching carefully, you see - but you don't react to any of them. Why?"

I stopped for a moment. "With all due respect captain, I do react, I just keep it to myself. I find that it's better to store hot-blooded emotions for a rainy day, for when you actually need them. Besides, getting angry over all these little things won't help anypony, least of all myself. Retaliation would only serve to confirm what they say about me." I thoughtfully scratched the underside of my chin. "Besides, they'll get what's coming to them one way or another. The universe works like that."

He stared at me, and shook his head. "You're brilliantly naive, you know that, right?"

I smiled and poked him on the nose. "Don't forget crazy."

And with that, I spun around on one paw, and sauntered away. I could hear the sounds of celebration, even from the barracks. The village was definitely getting down with its bad self. I exited the front door, and re-adjusted my hood. It was time to loosen up a bit, now. Daring Do was somewhere in town; I'd meet up with her and tell her what happened. Maybe she could show me where to get some booze around here...

Confound these ponies, they drive me to drink.

Hah! Always wanted to say that!

(12) Warning Signals

Ever been to a block party?

Probably the most fun you'll ever have. Especially in the city, during the summer. A lot of them are unplanned. They start slow, maybe with an old man setting out a grill and cooler on his front stoop. Then, his family comes out and joins him. Soon enough, some kids will come tearing out of their apartments and start romping on the street, playing stickball or tag in between the parked cars. They are often followed by their parents, who emerge from their homes like bats out of a cave to scold their offspring for breaking a window or something, but soon find themselves placated by their friends across the street, who also came out. After them, the teens, who despite their traditional indifference, suddenly feel lonely and ignored.

And before you know it, there's a throng of people outside, relaxing, drinking, laughing on curbs and sidewalks and stoops. The air is golden and warm, and somebody brought out a boombox, and they're playing some terrible music - but it doesn't matter, because you're having too much fun.

Eventually, some enterprising Samaritan with a wrench busts open the fire hydrant, and half the street is covered in a fine spray. People start dancing, singing, uncaring that their clothes are getting wet. The youngest barely even have anything on, screeching and whooping as they run underfoot through the water wonderland. The oldest folks simply take off their shoes and dip their feet in the puddles, content in the happiness of the evening. In between you have the adults and teens, rocking shorts and cutoffs, and everyone's letting their hair down and acting like the kids they once were.

It's a glorious thing. Like watching someone age in reverse. The worries just drip off them like the mud from a dirty child as their mother gives them a bath.

Lucky for me, this is pretty much what happened in Wethoof.

Un-luckily for me, there's always just one douchebag who ends up wrecking it.

The town had turned from a sleepy walled hamlet into a raging Equestrian version of Mardi Gras. As I made my way down the narrow roads and narrower bridges that connected the town's many raised platforms together, I could not help but be awestruck.

The sun, slowly lowering behind the western wall, set the sky afire in glorious hues of purple, pink, orange, and red. The town itself lay in the shadow thrown out by the wall, but was shining with a brilliance of its own. Colorful lights winked from windows and over the streets, like the lights of an Christmas tree. The varnished wood of the bridges and and platforms shimmered a deep amber, and it looked as though I was walking on honey. Confetti, balloons, and whoops of joy filled the air as the ponies frolicked in the streets, celebrating the downfall of one of Equestria's greatest enemies and the possibility of their deliverance.

All shapes and sizes and colors were present. Foals, stallions, mares, colts, and fillies alike all celebrated gleefully on the wooden platforms of Wethoof. The scientist inside of me noted that there was an even representation of both genders, unlike Ponyville. Regardless, I'd had no idea there were even this many in town; the few times I'd been here there were very few ponies outside. But now? Jesus, it was like the streets of New York City after the end of World War One! The atmosphere was intoxicating, generously sucking away any inhibitions I had and replacing them with the simple, pure joy of being alive.

The lack of hostility towards me was astonishing. Maybe the guards spread the word that I had an important role in this? As I dazedly made my way through the crowd, I became aware of someone yelling my name. I turned and was suddenly assaulted by a tan bundle of feathers wrapping me in a tight hug.

"Can you believe this?" Daring Do happily yelled in my ear over the glorious cacophony of noise. "It's like somepony flipped a switch and this place went back to the way it used to be!"

I gently set her down on the boardwalk, shaking my head in disbelief. "A few days ago this place was a ghost town." I smiled a bit at the perk of not having to shout anymore to make myself understandable of a crowd.

"I know, right!" She looked around. "Hey! Let's go somewhere a little quieter! I know a place close to here - a tavern. You in?"

"Lead the way, my fine feathered friend. I have news to share, as well."

Keeping up with her was surprisingly hard. Despite the fact that I towered over every single pony in town and could see her easily in the crowd, the sheer number of ponies outside, dancing and hollering and generally having a ball, made my size a disadvantage. I bobbed and weaved and knocked a few ponies over, (apologizing profusely each time) but eventually I managed to track her to one of the smaller platforms that made up Wethoof. Here was only a single building, a rotund, hut-like structure with a sloping, circular roof and a fire-hole on the top, from which a healthy spout of smoke and fumes were pouring.

I went in and found it surprisingly bigger on the inside. The single, circular wall of the tavern was lined with comfortable booths, most of them filled with groups of celebrating ponies. In the center of the room, a large, circular counter encompassed an open kitchen, furnished with a massive fire pit, over which various rainforest edibles were cooking on a spit roast. The smoke from the pit made the room comfortably hazy, and was vented out of the building by the fire-hole in the ceiling.

Somepony gave a sharp whistle, and I turned to find Daring Do waving me over to one of the booths on the far side of the room. I padded over, gracefully avoiding colliding with a serving-mare hauling a platter of food on her withers. I breathed in as I passed her, and my nose was enlightened by the astonishing aromas emanating from the steaming banquet. Slipping into the booth, across from Daring, I lowered my hood, as I noticed Daring had removed her hat. I was determined to make a positive impression to the townsponies, and manners are always a good start.

I was unprepared, however, when a stallion approached our table and gave a low bow. He did so with regal flourish, and straightened. He was an extremely tall, but thin unicorn, and had the grey coloring of an overcast sky. His mane was pale, almost translucent, and hung straight like a curtain. And from the look of the tye-dye cloak he was wearing, he had no sense of style whatsoever. Deep pink eyes regarded us with a strange combination of wisdom and insanity.

Wait a bucking minute...

"Ah, hello everypony! Mind if I drop in for some grub?"

He somehow slunk his way into the booth, on Daring's side. The explorer eyed him suspiciously.

"Can we help you?" she asked him flatly.

"Actually, yes!" He made no further elaboration, instead opting to simply sit there with a perky grin.

Daring and I exchanged a glance. "You could explain just a wee bit more, you know."

He chuckled. "Well, for starters, I'm positively famished. Let's place an order, shall we?"

Daring Do bristled, and her wings flared up instinctively, something pegasi do to make themselves more threatening. "Look, I don't know who you think you are, just waltzing up here like this, but if you think we're going to hoof out a free meal like that..."

I quickly silenced her with an upraised paw, observing the stranger with interest. Something about him was eerily familiar. "You're more than welcome here, traveler. If you need some food, I'm sure we can spare a few morsels." I gave Daring a withering glance. "Generosity IS a virtue, after all." The explorer abruptly wilted, an embarrassed blush on her face.

The stallion gave a hearty, bellowing laugh. "Ha! Whoa-ha-ha! By the sun and the moon, Fluffy, you never cease to surprise me!"

I smirked. Only one being would call me that. "Hello, Disarray."

Daring Do eyed the stallion with confusion. "Disarray? But isn't he, you know, not a pony?"

He reached inside the darkness of his cloak and pulled out a two-by-four, which had a poorly drawn face scrawled over it. He held the piece of wood up to his ear. "What's that, Plank?" He nodded a few times. "Alright, I'll tell them." The stallion then turned to us and smiled. "Plank says that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover. Or, for that matter, a particular half-draconequus, half-alicorn by his ravishing good looks."

I burst out into silent laughter. Oh Disarray, you whimsical bastard, you!

Luckily, Daring Do caught on just as fast. "Um... okaaaay then. So, Disarray... you can turn into a pony?"

"Heh. Well. Sort of." Disarray pulled back one side of his cloak, and I could clearly make out the stormy gray feathers of his wings, carefully tucked against his body underneath his tye-dye garment. "I might have renounced my crown, but I'm still royalty by blood. It shows. Hence, this marvelous covering!" He gave the cloak a dramatic swirl. "I feel so pretty, oh so pretty!" sang the hybrid, before he quickly hid his wings from sight once again, before anypony could notice.

"Why exactly are you here, though?"

He shrugged. "It gets lonely. Thought I might mingle a little bit in the festivities. And what festivities they are! I heard the news, Fluffy. Reinforcements on the way, my dear old Dad imprisoned once again... these ponies have much to celebrate."

Any further conversation was interrupted by the appearance of a server popping up at our table. "Welcome, everpony!" She said brightly. "May I... ai... ai... ai..." She broke off as she noticed me, leaning back into the booth, arms crossed, regarding her with an even stare. It was a look I'd perfected by now.

"Um... I'm sorry, but we don't serve your kind here," she managed to nervously stutter.

Poor girl. Her eyes were flicking back and forth and I could already see a few beads of sweat dot her forehead. She kept a fidgety stance, never having her hooves in place for very long, as though she was ready to bolt. I almost felt compassionate for a moment.

Almost.

"That's quite alright, miss. I can sate my appetite on the feast already laid out for me." I picked up a fork, and sniffed it delicately... before clamping down on the prongs and biting through the metal like paper. I chewed it up and swallowed, giving her a wicked grin. Ironically, it was actually quite tasty. "Then again, I'm sure your employer would be quite skeptical of whatever story you gave them regarding the missing silverware." I popped the rest of the fork in my mouth.

Whether it was the fact that I'd just eaten solid metal, my unusual method of communication, or even my appearance in general, she folded like a house of cards.

"I mean... Are you ready to order?"

"Got anything to drink?"

"A few bar items. And there's hard cider, a few wines, or a berry cooler... sir."

Ah, so they do have a some forms of alcohol in Equestria! Perfect... "I'll take your biggest container of the cider. And if you've got any gems, I'd like a ruby, please."

Disarray spoke up next, "I'll take a bottle of your finest blue wine. Oh, and I'll have one of those veggie shish-kebabs I saw over the fire pit, por favor."

The server once again looked nervous. "I'm dreadfully sorry, but we're on our last piece of firewood. We simply can't cook anything else on the spit."

"Oh, not to worry!" said the hybrid. "Here, take Plank. He's been nothing but a bother lately. He just talks, and talks, and talks! Ugh!" He hoofed her the innocent hunk of wood, which she regarded somewhat suspiciously, before simply sighing and turning to the last member of our group.

"And for you, Miss Do?"

"I'll take an Appleoosan Ambush, on the rocks. And a hayburger for the main, please," the explorer answered smoothly.

"Excellent. I'll have your orders out in no time..." She paused as she saw me hungrily eyeing a spoon. "Or immediately. Yes. At once." The mare nervously laughed before moving away from us a quickly as possible, taking the innocent two-by-four with her to a certain doom.

There was silence for a few seconds.

"Well, that was fun!" chirped Disarray.

I shrugged. After dealing with the Diamond Dog stigma for this amount of time, the sting was beginning to fade from incidents like that one. But it still irked me. There were no others my kind in the area, and apparently there hadn't been for many years now, thanks to the apparently genocidal mayor of Wethoof. One would think that hostilities toward us would have faded by now.

"So Echo, what was it that you wanted to tell me?" asked Daring, eager to get away from the awkward feelings created by the server.

I began reiterating the events of a few hours ago, and quickly brought her up to speed about Captain Tythus' plan to exterminate the hydra, the promotions of Baritone, Sparky, and Cloud Nine, and as much as I could about the meeting in his office.

The food arrived rapidly, and we all tucked in as I continued my recounting. I thoroughly enjoyed the keg of cider brought out for me, and even though I downed an enormous amount, I only felt a small buzz. Apparently, my body was not only resistant on the outside, but internally as well.

There were, however, some questions that arose.

"Let me get this straight," mumbled Daring through her hayburger. "Tythus wants you to work with the mare who almost killed me? And you're going along with it?"

"I put the entire town in danger. Of course I have to help. You may be dear to me, Daring, but you're still only one pony. There are quite a few here that I am responsible for, now."

She sighed. "Whatever. Say, how did you even get through that gate? I took a look at it a few days ago, and it looked burnt. Is that why Tythus needs your help? Because you can do that?"

To answer, I quickly scraped the claws on my index fingers together, and like striking flint with steel, a small shower of purple-pink sparks cascaded over the table. The claw on my left finger flared up with a soft fire, bathing the table in an eerie glow. I held it up like candle, and spoke with my free hand. "That's how."

She gave a low whistle of amazement, and even Disarray looked impressed.

"Whoa," was all she said.

"It seems you've somehow tapped into my power, Fluffy," mused Disarray.

He was met by two equally surprised gazes, so he continued, "When your claws first broke through my prison, they encountered my being at it's basest form - that of raw magic, pure essence. I can only assume that they soaked up a little of it, almost like... like, very dangerous, pointy sponges."

I sheathed the flaming claw to extinguish it and winced as it went out inside my finger. "Does that mean I can use magic, like a unicorn?"

"Not exactly." He paused and took a bite of his shish-kebab. "As far as I know, Diamond Dogs don't have any magic to begin with, or at least, if they do, it's intrinsic, like how an earth pony unconsciously influences plants to grow. No, this is different. You have magic, namely, some of my essence, but you can't mentally access and use it."

I was perplexed. I knew about much about magic as a baby knows about nuclear physics. "So then explain how I'm using it right now." I waved my paws around, carving the air with their glowing contrails.

"The magic in your claws isn't mentally activated. It's physical. Meaning, you can't control it or harness it. You merely... guide it. Think them as... lighters. The fuel for the fire is already in there; you just have to-" Disarray suddenly sat up straight, eyes riveted to something over my shoulder.

"Get down under the table. Now."

"Excuse me?"

"NOW," he growled. The tone in his voice had suddenly changed, from whimsical to steely. I found myself extremely unnereved by this, but nonetheless, I complied, sliding my large bulk under the table and curling up against the wall. I barely fit, and suddenly felt claustrophobic. I noticed something brush the tip of my ear, followed by a sudden giggling, and I suddenly realized that I was very, very close to the underside of Daring Do's belly.

Well, then. This is awkward.

She reached down and swatted my ear away. "Cut that out," she hissed, "It tickles like crazy!"

I managed to shoot her a glare before Disarray quickly slid into the seat I had occupied a mere second before.

From my new viewpoint, I saw the tavern from a baby's perspective; namely, the bottom half of everything. And it just so happened that four pairs of legs, two pairs a snowy white, two pairs a dusky cinnamon, were now standing in front of our table.

The white legs spoke first. "Miss Do," they said in a masculine, yet high voice, one that for some reason unnerved me greatly. "It's somewhat curious to see you here, alone. I was under the impression that you had a rather interesting travelling companion, yes?"

I heard Disarray give a slight cough, probably offended that he hadn't been included.

"Hello, mayor," replied the explorer, smooth as pond ice.

SHIT. It's Frost Snap!

"I'm afraid that you won't find him here; I think he's at the barracks," she continued. "It's just me and old friend having a drink and catching up." The slight rustling of her shirt was all the warning I got before she leaned forward then to indicate Disarray. I whipped my head back to avoid tickling her and slammed the back of my head into the wall.

THUNK!

"...Ow, my leg," said Disarray flatly.

There was a terrible pause, before he coughed again. "Sorry. I get twitchy sometimes." To emphasize this, he gave a horrible flinch, aiming another kick at me under the table.

"Quite. Anyway, if you see your Dog at any point in the future, I'd appreciate if you could pass on a message to it."

"Him," said Daring.

"Hmm? Sorry, can't hear you over the sound of nopony caring." The two of the white legs suddenly came up, and two solid bumps were heard as he planted his forelegs on the table. "Tell it that it's gone too far this time. I've tolerated it's filthy presence in my town, the destruction of my gate - the only thing keeping these ponies from a very painful end - and even you, Miss Do." His voice suddenly lowered in volume, but the venom in his voice increased tenfold. "But nopony endangers my daughter. Not even that blasted, washed-up sack of bones who calls himself a captain."

The four cinnamon legs took a few small steps back, as if afraid.

What was going on? I had to know.

I risked a small peek out from under the table. I looked up to see the body of a pure white stallion leaning over the table, his face hidden as he continued his chilling message. A glance to the left revealed Ginger Snap, standing nervously a few paces away.

Her gaze flicked down, green eyes widening in suprise. She started, as if she were going to say something.

I quickly shook my head, silently pleading.

Ginger frowned, obviously wrestling with something in her mind.

This calls for drastic measures. I resorted to the ace up my sleeve, the ultimate trump card, even better than the "get out jail free" card from Monopoly. It's one little word. One. Magical. Humiliating. Word.

"Please."

That did it. Something in her softened, and she leaned back again, returning her gaze straight ahead. I took the opportunity to gratefully slip back into the darkness.

Whatever it was that held her back, I wasn't sure. Maybe the camaraderie that forms between the guards, maybe I just got lucky. Or even, the odd look in her eyes. It was similar to the way she'd glared at me many times before. It was a look of pride, of something hidden, and of fear. However, there was a lot more of that last bit.

Did she fear her father more than Diamond Dogs?

"...So let me make myself perfectly clear, in case either of you traitors didn't understand me," Frost Snap was saying. "The monster leaves this town, and it does so tonight." His voice fell even lower, almost to whisper. "I'm not risking my daughter for anything. If that means the extermination of the hydras has to wait, so be it."

"With all due respect, mayor. If they aren't taken care of soon, you're all pretty much bucked." Disarray spoke just as quietly, although their was a lot more force behind his words. "Sure, one hundred of the buggers can't get through the walls. But two hundred? Three hundred? All fully grown? Even Canterlot Castle would fall to that. I know these things."

"Oh? And how is that, stranger?"

"..."

"..."

"Whoops, there it goes. Yup, my brain stopped."

I facepawed as softly as possible.

The mayor growled, I could imagine him shaking his head. "Remember that we had this conversation. It's the only fair warning I'll be giving."

And with that, the four pairs of legs turned and trotted away.

I waited for a few moments, not daring to breathe, before exploding out from under the table. The coast was clear. Suddenly exhausted, I sat down in my former seat as Disarray switched sides again. I ran my fingers over my muzzle, smoothing down the shaggy fur.

"One plus one is one on a bun, Echo," Disarray stated moodily.

I sighed, and picked up the keg of hard cider, downing the rest of it in one, massive, swig.

"I need a refill."

(13) Extinction

When the sun rose that next morning, I was waiting for it, perched atop the watchtower like an owl.

A light breeze came up from the distant ground, bringing with it the scent of rocks and water and moss. Already, the barren, gray wastes were beginning to heal, a short, but thick carpet of green was slowly converging on the town. Day by day, the forest was taking back what it had lost.

I turned my gaze to the western sky, where Luna's moon was melting into the distant canopy. From my position in the guard tower over the hastily-completed gate, I could see for miles. It's somewhat ironic that I was now in the position of watching the gate, the very place where I'd gotten myself into this mess.

After the intense celebrations of the night before, it had been found that the vast majority of the town guard were too inebriated to function properly. As a result, I had been called up to serve on the night watch, being one of the few beings in Wethoof not completely wasted or worse (despite consuming an entire barrel of hard cider). Even Captain Tythus had to take up a spot on the wall, and in the glare of the morning sun, I could see the shine of his armor from where he stood on the western ramparts, sharing the watch with Coconut, who stood some way off to his side.

I felt sorry for the other guards, who were undoubtedly nursing massive headaches, pulling themselves from beds that were not their own. The captain was probably going to break them into pieces for this whole fiasco. But then again, they'd only been in the guard for several weeks, and were still a bit undisciplined and informal. Not to mention the fact that anypony in the guard was suddenly regarded as a hero by the town. Cheers, free drinks, willing bedmates... No wonder so many had been unaccounted for at light's out in the barracks.

Who could blame them? Even ponies have needs.

And they knew how to satisfy them, apparently. But still, I knew so little about Equestrian culture that I didn't know what to make of it all. I wasn't even sure if these ponies counted as mammals, in fact. I mean, come on, they're cartoons! They have outlines! I have an outline!

No. Scratch that. Cartoons are imaginary. This was entirely real. Maybe the animated appearance of everything is just how Equestria looks?

Things were beginning to heat up as the morning progressed. The day promised to be a real scorcher, and already the dew on the tower had evaporated. I looked back at the sun again and made a stab at the time. My replacement for the watch should be arriving soon. Usually, pegasi handled jobs like this. They had better eyesight than earth ponies and unicorns, no doubt a trait designed to help them obverse their surroundings during flight. The only pegasus in the area, however, was currently asleep, slumped on his side several feet away, and making a fairly decent impression of a chainsaw as he gave a hearty snore.

Blueback, my other shadow, had been one of the less intoxicated guards. At least, one of the few still standing. Regardless, he'd spent the night up here with me, having passed out after about ten minutes. I'd found Popper conked out in town, half stuffed inside a rain barrel. Poor guy. Some ponies just didn't know how to handle their alcohol.

With a contented sigh, I settled down against the wall, running a paw over the massive hulks that made it up. Time began to trickle by, as it has a habit of doing when it's hot and muggy out. It was peaceful up here, but not exactly quiet. I could already begin to hear the noises of the town as it began waking up, carried here with the wind. A clank of pots and pans, the screeching sound of shower curtains being wrenched open, doors swinging on squeaky hinges, the sizzle of batter on a hot griddle.

I rubbed my right ear between two fingers, feeling out the V-shaped gap that it now sported. The sharpness of my heightened senses never ceased to suprise me. I could hear a pin drop at thirty paces, and see clearly in the darkest of nights. And smell... Whoa, momma! I could smell somepony coming long before sight and hearing could detect them. It's almost like radar. Except with your schnozz.

Go figure.

Bueback gave a soft grunt and flipped over onto his other side, obviously in the middle of some riveting dream. I regarded him with interest for a few seconds, before becoming distracted with a buzzing insect whining about my face.

I was bored now, anxious to return to the the barracks and sleep. I had some busted gear that needed repairing, too. And, judging by how threadbare my clothing was, I'd need to replace that too. A few rounds of mental gymnastics resulted in one or two improvements I felt could be made to my equipment. I'd talk to Tythus about it when I had the chance.

Suddenly, a new scent filled my nostrils. I inhaled deeply, trying to identify it. From that single whiff, I determined that the source was a pony, rapidly approaching. A mare, to be precise. She smelled of.. sniff sniff... spices, charcoal, and the barracks. And judging by the intensity of the scent, she was somewhat ticked off.

By Gandalf's bushy beard, it's Ginger Snap!

I rose to all fours and reclined against the ramparts, eyeing the trapdoor in the floor where she would have to come up, using the wooden staircase hammered into the inside of the tower that allowed non-flying beings access to its heights. Sure enough, a brilliantly red mane, followed by a toned, cinnamon body, trotted up the staircase to the tower.

She arrived at the vantage point, wincing as she shielded her eyes with a hoof against the glare. "Shift's over. I'll be taking it from..-"

Ginger paused as her eyes finally adjusted to the light, regarding me with barely-concealed suspicion.

"You."

"Me." I replied, fighting back with a legendary poker face, developed from years of experience in awkward situations.

She snorted to herself. "I didn't think we were this desperate for somepony on the night watch."

"You'd rather leave it up to him?" I said, pointing to the sleeping figure of Blueback, who gave an appropriate snore and twitched somewhat violently.

"If that means putting my life in his hooves, then yes." She half-growled, half-muttered. "At least I know where his loyalties lie."

"He's been doing quite a bit of lying, actually. In fact, his 'loyalty' has kept him in that position for the past eight hours." I retorted.

I could tell she struggled to keep down whatever reply came to her mind. Instead, she gave another irritated snort and went over to Blueback, giving him a firm poke in the gut with her hoof. The hung-over stallion didn't budge. Ginger frowned and gave him a push, rolling him over a bit. Blueback giggled in his sleep, his back legs giving a small kick.

"Oh, that's the stuff... Mmm... Pudding."

I facepawed involuntarily. It seemed that was happening a lot these days.

She gave him another poke.

"Harder!" cried the slumbering stallion. "Like... one of your... dirty mares..."

Ginger rolled her eyes, while I silently guffawed, bracing myself against the rampart. The mare gave Blueback a swift shove, sending him toppling from the landing onto the next floor of the tower below.

THUD!

"Zzz... Ah, yeah. That's the spot..." Came his bleary voice from below.

"Well that wasn't very nice," I mockingly scolded her.

"Stuff it, fleabag," she spat.

I waggled a finger. "Temper, temper."

"You shouldn't even be here!"

"Actually, I should be. Tythus specifically told me to take the night watch. You've got a problem with that, take it up with him."

"No. I mean here. In Wethoof."

That gave me pause. Frost Snap's warning flew around my head like a bat in a cave. A very uncoordinated bat. "What do you mean? Is this about last night?"

She said nothing, and seemed to shrink into herself.

We stayed that way for a while, sizing eachother up. Ginger looked at me as if I were a wild animal, and yet, she resembled one too, warily observing the slightest of my movements, and held herself tense, as if I were about to attack. The three thin scars that ran from her jaw to her neck glimmered in the sun, ugly pale gashes on an otherwise pretty face.

Wait... Three lines?

I held up my paw. Three fingers, not counting the thumb. Slowly, I extended all of the claws. The razor sharp lengths, once black, now a softly glowing violet, stained with the essence of a Prince, looked somewhat evil now. I sheathed them wearily. No wonder Ginger was so hostile. A Diamond Dog had done that to her.

I returned my gaze to her, and my understanding was reflected in her hard eyes. She spoke, but with voice lowered somewhat, and my ears flicked around like satellite dishes for an instant as they automatically adjusted to compensate for the volume. "You should have left last night, when he gave you the chance."

The morning sun suddenly lost it's heat, and a dreadful, unexplainable chill ran up my spine.

"Ever since your kind," she hissed those words like they were toxic, "took away my mother, he hasn't been the same. He hates you all, he'll stop at nothing to bury you six feet under."

I made no reply. Instead, I swallowed, rather nervously.

"You broke him. Took him away. He was once a good pony. But now?" She made a sound that wasn't quite laughter. "He's a reflection, a shattered mirror. And he knows it. My father wants a revenge he'll never have, because the last Diamond Dogs in the rainforest were wiped out on the same day as his wife. So there was nothing for him to take it out on. And for a time, he was content. Different, but content.

"And then you came along. You woke something up inside of him that I thought went to sleep a long time ago." Ginger sighed, and for the first time, I could see something else in her eyes besides fear or anger. It was pain. "That is why you need to leave. Because he'll stop at nothing to make sure you don't, that you never will. Even... even if that means taking a life."

Needless to say, I was stunned.

"Why are you telling me this?" I asked her.

She smiled then, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Telling? I'm not just telling. I'm going to show you why. I'm going to show you exactly what your kind did."

Ginger took a step forward, her eyes narrowing as the horn on her head suddenly igniting into a brilliant green blade of fire. I attempted to move away, but I was pressed up against the ramparts. No way out.

She sprang, faster than I could believe she was capable of, and that terrible green light filled my eyes, my mind, my entire being. I felt myself being pulled in an unfamiliar direction. Not up, or down, or to the sides. The only way to describe it was like being pulled away. From everything.

And then... I saw it all.

Ginger Snap lazily flicked a hoof at a butterfly that was flitting its way through the garden. The sun showered the world in gold, as it tends to do on lazy summer afternoons like this one. The mare gave a contented smile and half-lidded her eyes as she wriggled happily in the grass, looking up at the clouds.

A warm, deep, buttery voice came from her side. "That one looks like a castle."

She turned to see her father lying on his back a few feet away, hoof outstretched to the sky, as if he could touch it if he reached a little further. Ginger followed his hoof to where he was pointing.

"Nah. Maybe a house. Not a castle." Castles had towers and minarets, colorful swirling spires and imposing drawbridges for ponies to cross when they came to see the Princess.

Her father chuckled, a rich, booming laugh that carried far, despite how soft it was. She always loved it when he did that. "Well, how about that one?" He pointed to another cloud, off to the left.

Ginger frowned, her imagination running wild. "Kinda resembles a pony," she mused, "their face, at least."

"Oh? And what does this pony look like?"

"She's awfully pretty. She's got big eyes with a funny little notch in her left pupil-"

"-Your mother?"

"Yup! And there's some freckles on her cheeks and the biggest smile you'd ever see spreading them apart. And her mane is kinda messy, even though she tries so hard to keep it nice. But that doesn't matter, because everypony likes her regardless of what she looks like."

He was silent for a time. Then, "I can't believe she's finally coming back, after all these months. How do you think she found Fillydelphia? She wasn't very clear about it in her letters."

"Not one bit," Ginger scowled, "so you won't have to move there if she did."

Her father pointed to a third cloud. "That's a wagon wheel," he declared. "But Ginger, you know we'd never move away from Wethoof. We love it too much here, and you live here as well." He paused, and dramatically wiped an imaginary tear from his eyes. "Ah, my little filly, all grown up and living out in the big bad world! For shame! Has Celestia no pity on this poor stallion?" he cried.

"Daaaa-aaaad!" Ginger protested. "I had to move out sometime! You guys were just smothering me with love and understanding. And plus, you're kind of the mayor. What would ponies say if the mayor's daughter still lived with her parents?"

"That his cooking must be top-notch."

She groaned and playfully slugged him on the shoulder, though it barely even moved him.

They went back to cloud-gazing, as a wet eastern wind came up and sculpted the fluffy behemoths into a new, fantastic array of shapes. Ginger thought hard, about her mother and how much she missed her.

She'd left for the city several months ago to spend some time with her ailing parents, and that meant also spending time with her relatives, a rich, stuck-up pack of gossips, in Ginger's opinion, as well as her father's. That was why they'd opted to stay here, keep the place warm for when she got back. City life just didn't agree with them. And after so long, mother was finally coming home. Today, actually. She was due to arrive with the inbound caravan from one of the zebra settlements from the distant edge of the rainforest. Trade was critical for for the communities in this region, as many goods from outside the green expanse were not shipped here, and a complex network of small paths and tracks could be traveled from one end of the region to another, passing many smaller communities along the way.

The Great Southern Rainforest was a wonderful place. And ever since Frost Snap and Mosspaw had assumed leadership roles in their respective communities, even more wonderful. An unheard-of prosperity had sprung up between the Greenclaws and Wethoof as the D-Dogs dug up gems for the ponies to trade to far-off places, and for their efforts, got supplies and territory. It was unusual, working with the Greenclaws, but so far, the peace had held. Mosspaw and Frost went way back, apparently. They'd met back in the older days when the D-Dogs were savages and the ponies not much more civilized. Ginger had often heard the stories about their adventures, now almost myths. They'd worked hard and long for this balance between the two species, and for the moment, it was holding.

The sound of strong wingbeats abruptly filled Ginger's ears, interrupting her thoughts. One of the pegasi from the town, one of those who foraged far and wide for rare plants for trade, almost crash landed not three hoof-steps away, digging up a small trench with her face.

Her father was up at her side in an instant, concern clear in his voice. "Dewdrops? What's wrong? Why were you flying so fast? Was something after you?"

The mare silenced him with hoof, breathing hard. "The... caravan... attacked..." She gasped.

Ginger's ears wilted like tropical flowers in the desert sun. Her father briefly did the same, before assuming the distant, calculating mindset that had allowed him to lead the town through several dangerous scenarios. It was why he was in charge. It was why he was such a capable leader.

"Location." Was all he said.

Dewdrops took another shuddering breath. "Northwest... The caves..."

"Did you see who was responsible for it."

"Yes..." Breath. Swallow. "The Greenclaws."

Her father hesitated for exactly one-half of a second, before saying, "Rest here. I'll be back."

And with that, he turned and thundered away, off in the direction of the caves. Ginger was hot on his hooves, doggedly keeping up with his blistering pace. The town whipped by her in a blur, and suddenly they were slipping through the jungle in the way that only rainforest natives know how to do, like birds through the air.

The mark on her father's flanks almost seemed to be glowing white hot as she followed him. The emblem of a stormy cloud shaking down thick flurries of snow symbolized his unique talent for elemental magic, a trait all the Snap unicorns seemed to have. But they meant more than their particular magical talent. The marks reflected their personality, as well. Frost Snap was not a cold stallion, but he could be as hard and sharp and unyielding as ice, something that a good leader needs to be in times of trouble.

Ginger's own mark, a wisp of flame, demonstrated her own particular talent with fire, as well as her fiery disposition and occasional lapse of temper. She remembered the day she got it. How proud her parents had been! How proud the village had been! The smile on her mother's face was something she'd never forgotten.

They were a quarter of the way there when her father spoke, still in his mayor-mode. "You must turn back."

"What!?" Ginger huffed as she skimmed the edge of a tree, still going full speed.

Her father took a mighty leap, clearing a massive fallen log in a single bound. Ginger awkwardly scrambled up and over after him, and quickly regained her pace.

"Mosspaw would never attack a caravan unless something is seriously wrong." Her father stated.

"No! I'm coming with you! I could care less about the caravan, it's who's with it that's important! Mom could be hurt... Or worse!" GInger vehemently denied. Like it or not, she was going.

Her father knew it was pointless to argue with her once her mind was made up.

So he didn't.

Instead, his horn flashed an hot blue, and Ginger suddenly ground to a halt, falling flat onto her face as her lower body was encased in ice. She wriggled desperately as her father continued onwards. He looked back once, a quick glance, and then he was gone, a ghost in the undergrowth.

Ginger furiously struggled against her icy bonds, screaming after him long after he'd left earshot. Her own horn lit up,a brilliant green, same as her eyes, and the ice began to steam ever so slightly. But it was too slow. She wasn't getting out anytime soon. Her concentration faltered, panic set in. The glow ceased.

Her long, wordless screech echoed through the forest for a long time.

Ginger was pissed.

The block of ice she'd been trapped in had not merely melted. No, once she'd regained her senses, she'd gone far beyond the necessary energy to free herself, fueled by her anger and desperation.

The ice had been vaporized.

And now, as she tore through the undergrowth, her hooves left scorched prints on the ground. Wayward leaves that brushed her coat singed and smoked. The very air around her shimmered with heat waves.

How could he do that to me? She thought furiously. HOW COULD HE!

She let out a fearsome yell and pushed herself even faster, until the trees became vague impressions, and the undergrowth nonexistent. She literally burnt her path through the forest as she ran, arrow straight, a comet that had come to ground, streaking forward in a blaze of fire.

Ginger knew the way. She'd come to the Greenclaw den many times before, alongside her father.

The jungle opened up, and she was running on a flat plain now, the clearing before the caves. A well-worn path appeared beneath her hooves, carved into the ground by generations of paws. Just around the bend now... There! The entrance to the den, a yawning gash in the ground at the very apex of a small hill, as if some giant had decided to sculpt a massive anthill and smash their fist through the very top.

She crested the hill and dived through the entrance, trailing sparks and smoke with every step. For a moment, the hill resembled a volcano, before the trail cleared away.

She was in. The rank scent of Diamond Dog filled her nostrils, of dirt and rock and the deep places of the earth. The dimly-lit tunnels passed by her startlingly fast, luminescent gemstones flickering menacingly from where they were embedded in the roof. But something was wrong. There were no inhabitants, nopony anywhere. Her hoofsteps rebounded eerily off the walls.

Ginger's anger quickly faded away in the solemn silence. The cape of flames was extinguished with a faint hiss. Something about this place put her on edge.

Her ears flicked nervously. The atmosphere felt... wrong.

The tunnels usually had plenty of traffic. D-Dogs coming and going, some laden with cartloads of gems, others with digging supplies or fresh kill caught in the forest. It was hustling and bustling, loud and vibrant, a city below the barrier that separated earth and sky.

"So where the hay is everypony?" she dared to ask herself out loud.

The echoing of her voice mocked her with the same question.

They must be in the cave, she reasoned. It's where they always go when something big is happening.

An expansive, cathedral-like cavern, located deep in the tunnel system, served as a sort of meeting hall for the Greenclaws as well as a sort of dormitory. Ginger had often found it odd that they all slept in one big pile, but now wasn't the time to wonder about such things. She had to find her father.

She followed the tunnel for what seemed like ages, before she finally came to a branch. The inhabitants this place were unparalleled excavators, and had dug out their home so that one could easily traverse its twisting passages with great speed, provided they knew they rule by which the tunnels were built. It was like that in all Diamond Dog dens, or so she'd learned. the rule could be simple, or it could be extremely complex, in some of the more paranoid packs. In this case, it was merely, "Right is Down, Left is Up." Something her father had said to her many times.

Ginger took the right tunnel, speeding through a narrow passage that twisted crazily around like the flight path of a Wonderbolt, corkscrewing ever further into the depths. Her heart was thundering in her chest.

The walls drew away as she emerged into a monolithic cavern, studded here and there with curious rocky spires, some coming down from the ceiling, some reaching up from the floor, many as thick as tree trunks. The roof of the cavern was so high, she couldn't make it out, and the soft taps of water dripping onto the floor sounded odd in the weird acoustics of this room. This was where most of the Diamond Dogs could be found, or at least they had been the last Ginger had been here.

She slipped from pillar to pillar, keeping to the shadows. There were dangerous things that lurked in the depths, and she didn't know what was going on here, either.

A voice sounded, gruff and sonorous. She recognized it instantly as Mosspaw, the Alpha of the pack. Ginger strained in the gloom, trying to pinpoint his location, but to no avail.

"...Don't try it, icycorn. We need her to rebuild what has been lost. She is only one that can find us the gems, the few that remain."

Icycorn? That was what they called her father. He must be in here, too...

"Was raiding the caravan needed to get her though?" Frost Snap's voice cut through air like a steel blade. "Moss, listen to yourself. You sound like Old Yellowfang."

"Last Alpha would have prevented this from happening." Hissed Mosspaw. "We listened to ponies, we work with them, and see what happen to us? Gone! Almost all, gone..."

Ginger swiveled her ears around desperately. There, a rustling sound, far off in front of her. She hunkered lower to the ground, smoothly sliding around her pillar and darting to the next one, careful not to hit the cave floor too hard with her hooves.

"How was I to know what would happen? Do not blame this on me, old friend. Or yourself. This was an accident. But we can fix it! Together!"

The mare poked her head out from around her hiding place, and barely managed to stifle a gasp.

Mosspaw and her father were circling eachother, slowly, cautiously. The Diamond Dog looked terrible, his ribs were showing through, and the vest he wore was torn and the pockets empty of gems. His short black fur had become patchy, and looked to have been torn in in some places. His namesake paws, huge mitts covered in a greenish-brown fur, were tensed, gripping his spear tightly. Opposite, her father stood tall and strong, but a she saw an uncharacteristic flicker of doubt in his eyes.

Between the two males lay another pony, another unicorn mare, tied at the legs and around the snout with vines. Brilliant gem-green eyes looked fearfully up from the floor and locked gazes with Ginger.

Ginger felt her heart fall into her stomach, and keep going.

"Together, icycorn? There is no more together!" Mosspaw growled, low in his throat. "All gone... Because of you! Leave my den, leave me to rebuild my pack! Your fancycorn mate will be returned when we've scoured the last gems from this evil place."

"I cannot allow you to do that." Frost Snap lowered his horn. "She's coming home, Moss."

"Then you will be follow her in pieces."

Her father looked taken aback, and flinched at the Diamond Dog. "Has it truly come to this? We were like brothers, once." He said quietly.

Mosspaw responded with a long, threatening growl that resembled the sound of two boulders grinding together. He tossed his spear to the side, the wooden staff clattering nosily on the stone floor far away. His paws flexed, and eight long, dagger-like claws extended to wicked points. He dragged these on the ground, tearing deep gashes in the rock.

Her father shook his head, before his horn ignited in a pale blue aura.

Nothing moved.

Nothing breathed.

Ginger's hoof slipped from it's position, making a scuffing noise that resounded through the cave like a crack of thunder. Her father's eyes flicked to her, widening in surprise, and then narrowing again as Mosspaw took advantage of the lapse in concentration.

The Diamond Dog leaped across the gap, clearing the bound mare between them with a single bound. His claws came down, narrowly missing Frost's head. The unicorn dipped to the side and lashed his horn across, and the dull shriek of horn on claw screamed throughout the cavern. They broke apart, and came together again, exchanging a testing series of parries and feints, feeling eachother out.

Frost lunged, seizing an opening. Moss twisted away, grabbing him by the neck and spinning violently, sending the stallion sailing away, twirling like a top, before he slammed into the pillar Ginger cowered behind, and collapsed to his knees, winded.

Ginger winced and ducked back into the shadow as she saw Mosspaw charge, one fist cocked back behind his head.

CRACK!

The force from the punch sent jagged lines criss-crossing up the pillar, and Ginger's teeth were jarred simply from being close to the impact. She was reminded why the Diamond Dog was the new Alpha. They had to earn that right through combat.

There was a flash of blue light, and a howl of cold wind. Frost had regained his hooves. He sprang up from where he had rolled and slashed downwards. His opponent had barely enough time to block it, before Frost whipped around on his forelegs and bucked him right in the gut.

Mosspaw slid backwards, grimacing while one arm clenched his stomach and the other warded off a ferocious offensive. He gave ground, one step. Now two. Three. His paw went left when the horn went right.

A streak of bright red, splattering the shattered pillar. Ginger's eyes widened in shock from where she hid in the shadows as she noticed the salty taste of something landing in her gaping mouth.

Mosspaw gave a bellowing roar at the sight of his own blood, and pushed back, going on the offensive. His claws flickered wickedly in the gloom, crashing against her father's horn time and time again. Frost was losing ground, now, his neck weakening. The glow of his horn was flickering. Another strike slapped his head to the side, exposing his throat. He sank to his haunches, forelimbs raised vainly to ward off the inevitable. Mosspaw lunged forward, his claws homing in-

"NO!"

A jet of brilliant green fire lanced out from behind the cracked pillar, striking the D-Dog squarely between the shoulders and sending him skidding away on his stomach, smoking and hissing.

Ginger wondered for a split second who had done that - before realizing only she was capable of flames of that color. Shaking her head in disbelief, she rushed across the floor to puller her father to his hooves.

"You shouldn't be here." The stallion managed to grunt, before turning his head to one side and spitting out at tooth. "This is between him and I."

"And now it involves her, icycorn..." came Moss' voice from the shadows.

The pair whirled around, now back to back. Horns ignited, one green, one blue. The surrounding pillars were illuminated in their flickering, alien light, and the cave suddenly looked very threatening without the dim ambiance. Ginger's eyes struggled to adjust.

"You know the rules as well as I do... Frosty." He taunted them. "And both of you had your chances to leave..."

"Show yourself, old friend." Her father responded evenly, his legendary cool head giving his daughter confidence.

There was a clattering noise to Ginger's left. She turned, horn at the ready...

"GET DOWN!"

A hoof shoved her roughly to the ground, something whizzed by her head and crashed into the shattered pillar, completely obliterating it. The pieces of rock tinkled to the ground like glass. One of the pillars hanging from the roof toppled to the ground, spraying her with sharp shrapnel.

"So that's how it's going to be..." her father muttered. He leaped to the center of the room, standing a few feet away from his bound wife. "Ginger, to me!"

She unsteadily rose to her hooves and stood by his side, facing the opposite direction, eyes desperately scanning the darkness for movement.

A chill magical wind, faintly glowing, swept her mane around, blowing errant strands over her eyes. Her father's horn was shining brightly now, he gave a low groan of effort and the wind suddenly intensified from a frigid breeze to a howling blast of cold. It whipped around the three ponies in a dreadful tempest of light, a tornado of ice and snow and pure magical energy. Ginger shivered, despite the fact that it was much, much warmer in the eye of the storm than the outside.

The Snap family heritage - powerful elemental mages, all of them, and her father was no exception. Ginger might one day be this powerful, provided she lived through this encounter.

As if to combat the force of nature, a low, keening howl, almost a wail, piercingly reverberated over the shriek of the storm her father had summoned. Ginger involuntarily shuddered - there was enough sadness and loss in that one note to send a pony into tears under different circumstances.

The howl abruptly stopped.

A huge shape cut through the wall of wind. Ginger felt something hot stinging the side of her face, before she was bowled her over and sending her skipping into a pillar. Her head cracked against the side, her vision flickered. Her legs suddenly felt heavy and lethargic. Why couldn't she move them?

"Moss! Leave her out of this!" Frost roared.

Her father ceased the storm, having drawn out his foe. They clashed again, holding no quarter. Each was the protector of their home, and each equally qualified to defend it. Each had spent a good deal of their life in the others company, learning and teaching until they knew eachother as much as themselves.

They danced away, and spun back into combat, now standing directly over the bound mare, who was struggling wildly against her bonds. Mosspaw brought his paws together and attempted to viciously bash in Frost's head. The unicorn twisted and caught the blow, and twisted again, locking the claws against his horn. His forelimbs came up, stopping the fanged muzzle in its tracks from biting down on the back of his neck.

Mosspaw strained and heaved, but Frost was as unyielding as a glacier. He couldn't move from the lock, and furiously eyed the smaller pony.

The completely calm, icy blue eyes of the unicorn gazed back, infuriating pools of intellect and tranquility.

Another howl tore from his throat, this one deeper and more powerful. Ginger's ears hummed with it, her entire body began to shake. The cavern resonated with the note, and the pointed pillars began to tremble.

"Moss! Stop that!"

The howl increased in volume. Pebbles on the floor skittered around like they were alive. Ginger winced and covered her ears, yet still the sound echoed furiously through her skull. The cavern itself seemed to tingle with the terrible noise. The pillar behind her suddenly spiderwebbed with cracks.

"Moss! You'll bring the whole place down!"

But the Diamond Dog was lost to his grief, and would not be silenced. He paused only to suck in another breath and release another howl, this one even more intense. There was a horrible cracking noise from above. Her father suddenly began to struggle, not to contain him, but to break free from the lock, which was now working againsthim.

"MOSS! LOOK OUT!"

Her father's horn erupted into life, spitting out a blue pulse of freezing energy, blowing his friend away. The howl faded rapidly, the cave was now eerily silent.

One of the pointed rock pillars, shaken free by the booming dim, suddenly plunged down from the roof of the cavern, right where Mosspaw had been standing a split second before...

...And impaled itself into the body of the mare, who had been lying below the struggle, spearing straight through her side and into the rock below.

Ginger's entire world shrank to a pinprick.

Her father's face, splattered a horrible crimson, in absolute shock.

Mosspaw, trapped against one of the standing pillars by a blanket of ice, falling still.

Her mother's eyes, fixing her with one last, indescribable look, before they closed forever.

Her father, giving a small twitch, something in him shattering.

Her father, walking slowly to where Mosspaw was bound to the rock.

Her father, jerking his head forward, his horn sinking into flesh.

Her father, helping her to her hooves, horn stained red.

Her father, finally sinking to his stomach at the side of his dead wife.

Broken.

Chipped.

Snapped.

My eyes flew open. Where was I? What had just happened?

The tower roof and the open sky presented itself to me from an unusual angle - sideways. I must have fallen over. I rolled off my stomach onto my side, where I saw Ginger Snap, hunched over, wordlessly sobbing into the woodwork.

Without even thinking, without even bothering to even consider thinking, I went to her side and wrapped an arm around her. She flinched, hesitated, then leaned into me, the tears flowing freely.

After what seemed like forever, she stopped. She wiped her face with a hoof and sniffled.

"What was that?" I asked her. "I was watching the world for a while."

"Remember Forever."

"What?"

She wiped again. "It's a spell. To show somepony a memory."

Fucking magic...

I began to think. If what Ginger showed me had actually happened, then that explained so much. But the circumstances surrounding it were unknown. What had been the reason for the vanished Greenclaws? Why had Frost Snap been blamed for it? What had they been doing in those caves?

I had many questions now. But I was going to get them answered, one way or another.

And Ginger Snap was going to help me.

Author: Longest chapter yet! Wow! This chapter was a bitch and a half to write! I switched to third person for obvious reasons, but I haven't done that in a while. Hope you like the action scene, I'm trying to get better and better at those.

(14) Pavlov's Legacy

"...That is why you need to leave. Because he'll stop at nothing to make sure you don't, that you never will. Even... even if that means taking a life."

Ginger's warning from before the memory spell resounded in my head like the nagging of an angry spouse. Persistent, grating, and currently not making me a sandwich. All the things I disliked about spouses. But she had good reason to warn me. After all, I had quite the foe itching for my head on a pike.

Frost Snap is, in a sense, a superhero's worst nightmare. Mainly because he's not actually an evil pony. He'd been mayor for a long time, and had done a damn good job of it, apparently. He is capable - does things himself, and gets them done well. He didn't rely on inept henchman, something all cliche villains tend to do. He is respected, admired, even feared a little. He has a position of leadership, and ponies listen to him because he'd been there for them time and time again over the years. He wasn't really a villain at all. Just... warped. Warped enough to kill somepony, even if he thought he was doing the right thing.

Was simply staying here endangering the town? Was I putting them all at risk of suffering from the wrong end of Frost Snap's wrath? Would he really resort to harming innocents if it meant he could get at me? I didn't know, and I surely didn't want to find out.

But then again, I'm not here for him. I'm here for the hydras, the real danger. And I made a promise to help. So if Frost gets in my way... well, then I'd have every right to fight back.

It's considered good manners to keep a promise, you know.

It was hot out. So hot, if you were packing candy and stepped outside, you'd have soup in your pocket by the time your sneaker hit the pavement. I was grateful for my hood - it provided a delightfully thick shade.

Without the sheltering cover of the canopy, which the ponies had cleared away to build their wall, the tropical sun struck full force, baking the ground into cracked earth where the regrowth of life had not yet reached. It was in this area, outside the relative protection of the wall, that I found myself working alongside some of the guards, sinking shafts into the ground for the magical charges that were supposed to wipe out our scaly foe.

"Take a breather, mate. Gotta heave this blasted thing to the pile." Coconut heaved another large rock I'd tossed up onto an already-overstuffed cart, before hitching himself up and slowly dragging it away, the heavy wagon leaving deep ruts in the loam.

I deeply exhaled, wiping some sweat from my brow and shaking myself a little to shed some of the dust and dirt that had gotten into my coat. The small pit I was in, something I'd been digging out for a while now, was gradually taking shape under my paws, more so from instinct than actual skill. The other two pits, each with three or more ponies armed with shovels and carts of their own, were significantly shallower, despite the fact that I was all alone.

Each one of these holes were intended for the impromptu explosives that Sparky's team had managed to rig up. They were quite powerful, or so I'd heard, each being an incredibly dense concentration of magical spells and the like intended for the Summer Sun Festival. Tythus had been quite specific when he'd told us the depth he'd wanted them buried at. Any higher, and they actually might damage the wall itself.

My head was a least a foot below ground level by now, and the hole with a diameter as wide as my armspan. Coconut and I had spent most of the morning working on it, and I was quite proud of my work. A smaller pile of rubble and debris was already perched somewhat precariously on the pit's edge, ready to be carted away once Coconut got back.

Giving a satisfied nod once I determined that I was far ahead of schedule, I took this time to sink down to my stomach, relishing the sensation of the cool soil on my fur. A glance up at the pale sky revealed a solitary pegasus, nothing more than a dot, wheeling and soaring high above the world. I groaned and rolled over onto my stomach, contentedly wriggling around in the dirt, my tail beating a soft staccato on the packed floor.

After about ten minutes of rest, I heard the sound of hooves on dirt, of regular, deep breathing, accompanied by the many noises a cart makes when it travels.

"Oy! Get off yer lazy flank - nap time's over."

Coconut's chocolate head poked out over the edge of the pit. I gave a vaguely affirmative grunt and proceeded tearing into the ground, heaving up large chucks of compacted soil and rocks. Most of the projectiles landed in the cart, but a few missed, Coconut picking up these, as well as the leftovers from the last trip.

We talked as we worked, as friends tend to do. Coconut was understandably curious about me, given that I was completely different from what he'd expected a Diamond Dog to be.

"So, where exactly are ya from, again?" he said as he heaved another rock away from the pit's edge.

"Far away. Very, very far away." I had decided not to use the whole 'amenisia' shtick I'd read about in situations like these. Instead, I gave vague answers; telling the truth, but not all of it. As far as I could tell, it was a good method, and had thus far served me well. After all, it's one thing to be a foreigner from a distant land, and another thing entirely to be an alien from another world.

"Like, how far away? Where exactly is that, mate?"

I paused from excavating rather large boulder. Where exactly was Earth from here? Was I in a new dimension, or simply at another point in the universe? I took a sophisticated guess, and chose the latter. Hell, life was entirely possible somewhere in the cosmos, and it was even more possible that this is what it would be like. Unlikely, yes. Impossible? No.

"See the sun?" I pointed a finger at the glowing ball of heat hanging midway up the eastern sky.

"Yup?"

"Past it."

He scratched his head, frowning in thought for a few moments. "So... east?"

I shrugged. "... Pretty much."

"What's it like there?"

That one made me pause for a bit. How could one ever summarize Earth, with all of humanity included? We are an indescribable kind, humanity. Full of different people, faces, and ideas. It's very hard to generalize us, becasue there are always outsiders to any specific group you try to put us into. Plus, we're violent, somewhat sadistic, corrupt, and often times completely idiotic. We have the power to destroy our planet in a single blast, but instead are slowly chipping away at its ecosystem, bit by bit.

But humanity has some good qualities, too. We're curious. We actively seek that which we do not know. We're ingenious when it comes to technology. We make fantastical art of every kind. We're incredible engineers, even more impressive is the fact that some of the architectural feats of Earth rival anything I've seen in Equestria, and they were constructed without the use of magic. Plus, we invented the internet. That's gotta count for something, right?

It took me a few more seconds to think of a response, but then it hit me like the time a midget popped out of the ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese's to punch me in the nuts - I totally deserved it, by the way (I'd thrown him in there in the first place, but we were cool after he delivered a Falcon Punch to my babymakers). If you're wondering how that's even remotely possible, I have two words for you. Vegas. Weddings.

"Take the best dream you ever had, and mix it with your worst nightmare. That's what it's like where I'm from."

Coconut looked taken aback. "That sounds pretty wild, mate."

"You've got no idea."

I remembered a night of complete debauchery, somehow ending up butt-naked, slathering a bacon-cheeseburger across my chest in a public restaurant with a police officer giving me the evil eye... yeah. That actually happened. Again, Vegas. Some guys just can't handle it. Like me.

We stated talking about nothing in particular, and kept at it for another thirty minutes or so as we worked. Eventually, the conversation shifted to cutie marks, something I was eager to learn about.

"Do Diamond Dogs have emblems?"

"Emblems? You mean cutie marks?"

He snorted with laughter, and wheezed a little as he caught another large rock on his back. "Hay, Echo. Cutie marks are fer mares. I'm a stallion! Hoo-ah!" The large earth pony flung the rock off with a mighty heave, and struck what I assumed to be the Equestrian version of the Captain Morgan Pose. A swooshy background wouldn't have looked out of place, here.

I rewarded his efforts with a shower of dirt.

"Ach! Ptah! Knock that off!" he grumbled, brushing some soil from his short, yellow mane. "Ya got one or not?"

I craned my neck to look at my rear. Nope! Just two cheeks and a tail. I parted some of the fur on my haunches to make sure a mark wasn't covered up on my skin, but no such luck.

I shook my head, somewhat disappointed. "Sorry. I'd think if I had a picture of something on my bum, that would have been obvious. After all, I'm not wearing any pants." I turned to one side and slapped my ass. "I'm really loving the breeze, by the way!"

He roared with laughter. "Ha-har! Who wears pants? Pants are fer squares!"

"Agreed. So, on the subject of 'emblems', how did you get yours?"

Coconut pointed to his mark: a whisk, a spatula, and a smiling face, arraigned like a skull-and-crossbones. "This ole' thing? Well, I got it when I was still a liddle colt. Me mum and pop, see, they weren't exactly gettin' along well at th' time. Had a big fight or somethin' recently - can't remember exactly; it's been a long time - and I got it into me head that if I could cheer them up, everythin' would be right 'n' dandy. So, I tries gettin' them together to talk it out. That don't work, 'o course. Then I tried doin' the housework for 'em; ya know, the cleanin' the chores, etcetera. Hay, that only gave 'em more time to keep arguin' and bickerin'."

I hauled up another load to the edge of the pit, solemnly crossing my arms. "I know what that's like. My own folks split up a long time ago."

Coconut bucked a circular boulder over to the cart. "Anyway, I was gettin' pretty desperate by now. So I go stop by that place in town; the tavern, ya know what I'm talkin' about?" At my nod, he continued. "I knew the old cook at that place, we had a thing goin' where I'd drop by and he'd tell me stories about the places he'd been and the ponies he'd served. Used to be a chef at Canterlot, apparently. Made food for the Princess herself!" He shook his head, as if still not able to believe it. "When I told him about th' trouble goin' on at home, he pulls me close and he says; 'There's nothing better than a good, hot meal to bring ponies together and forget their troubles.'

"So, I asked him to teach me how ta cook, and when I had enough skill to make somethin', I decided that I'd make me parents some chow. Oh, and did they love it, mate! Ya shoulda seen the looks on their faces! They completely forgot what they were arguin' about in the first place. And that's when this thing popped up on me arse, right as you please." He proudly pointed to his mark. "And ever since then, I've been doin' what I love; makin' good grub and bringin' ponies closer together."

"That's a good story."

"Yeah, mate. And I'm gonna be givin' it a better endin', too."

I cocked an eyebrow. "Oh?"

"I'm gonna see the world, once this is all over. Travel here and there, learn new ways of cookin', new recipes... and one day, when I've learned all there is and become a master chef like the old cook, I'm gonna go to Canterlot and give the Princesses the meal of their lives."

That gave me an idea. An idea that was crazy, admittedly. But so crazy, it just might work...

"Coconut, why don't we travel together?"

"Eh?" he said, as he spat out a smaller rock onto the pile in the cart, which was once more creaking and groaning under the weight of its burden.

"See, I'm doing something similar. I want to travel all across Equestria and learn as much as I can about this place - it's a lot different from where I'm from. But instead of just fine cuisine, I want to learn everything, go everywhere. See the world. Once I'm done here, of course."

He looked at me weirdly then, as if to make sure I was real and not a figment of his imagination. "Mate, you've got to be the strangest Diamond Dog I've ever met."

I snorted with amusement. "I've heard that before."

"But I like the sound of that. And I'm gonna need somepony to try out a new recipe once I've learnt it... all right. I'm in."

I offered up my paw from where I stood in the pit, which he met with a hoof. We shook.

"Right. This pit's just about done. Let's head back to the barracks now, yeah?"

Coconut nodded and hitched himself up to the cart, while I tensed by powerful hind legs and leaped straight up out of the pit. I joined him at his side, and we set off for the debris pile.

There were two piles, actually - small hills, to be honest - forming a sort of earthen ramparts in the ground at two specific points along the walls. This was the area the hydras would be led to, and pinned against the wooden wall, while ground troops, led by Tythus and the commanding officer from the reinforcements, would stand atop the smaller dirt walls to keep the hydras from running off to the sides. The entire trap was shaped like a bucket, if viewed from above, the wooden wall making up the bottom and the dirt walls being the sides. The explosives were to be placed inside the bucket, towards the top. The dirt walls themselves were about two stories high, most of the material being dug out by other work crews in different areas and carted here.

Coconut tipped the cart up where a forepony directed him to, dumping the heavy load in a shower of rocks and soil. A lot of the ponies working on this weren't actually guards, but they were capable nonetheless and had offered to help. A good thing, too - the thirty-something or so guards simply didn't have enough numbers to do all of this fast enough.

As we passed under the gates, I couldn't help but glance up at the solitary figure still standing in vigil atop the tower. Ginger Snap's signature scowl was visible even from the ground. I waved good-naturedly at her. Surprisingly, the mare waved back, although only once, her scowl deepening.

Sour-puss.

"Might want to hurry up, mate," said Coconut, who pulled ahead once we were behind the walls. "I think Tythus is having us fitted today for the battle."

I nodded earnestly as I padded alongside him. This could be a good chance to repair my busted gear.

Whoosh! Clang!

"No."

"No?"

Whoosh! Clang!

"No."

The smith paused from his work, setting his trusty hammer down against the anvil and wiping a stream of sweat from his forehead. On the anvil itself, a molten hunk of iron was slowly taking shape into one form or another under the watchful eye and steady strikes of its operator. The smith snorted, and spat to the side, before taking the hammer back with one hoof and resting it over his powerful shoulders.

"Can't do it. Much as I'd like to - Celestia knows you're going to need one - it's the law. Now get back. I've never made anything for a D-Dog before, so this is going to get messy."

The only smith in Wethoof, a stalwart earth pony called Bellows, turned back to the anvil and whipped the hammer down with a tremendous force, sending up a shower of sparks and heat as the molten ingot warped and twisted under the blow.

Clang!

I sighed, and plopped myself down on a nearby bench next to Coconut, who was standing nearby, trying to get used to the weight of his new suit of rudimentary armor and a long, wooden spear kept in the crook of his foreleg.

Bellows was not a member of the town guard. If he was, then this wouldn't be such a problem. Tythus had sent us here to be properly equipped for some protection and a weapon each. Coconut had gotten his almost immediately - the smith had a small stockpile already made and ready to go. But for me? I had to get my things made fresh out of the forge.

Clang!

Well. Most of my things, anyway. The smith absolutely refused to make me a weapon of any kind. Apparently, a new law had been enacted almost overnight that made it illegal to sell or give arms to any non-pony inhabitant in Wethoof. Namely, me. I had to hand it to Frost Snap, he worked fast. The law applied to the citizens, not the guard, which was why the smith had to abide. While he couldn't give me a weapon, he could still make me some protection. For that much, I was grateful.

Besides, I was more than capable of making my own weapons. Humans have a natural talent for turning the most basic of instruments into tools of death.

After all, words might not be able to do much damage, but sticks and stones can definitely break bones.

Clang!

Or worse.

Bellows had finished his work. He showed me each piece of armor, and instructed me in it's proper maintenance, before showing me how to strap it on.

A chain-mail shirt now covered my chest and the upper parts of my arms, and covered my head in a metal coif, as well. There was one pauldron over my right shoulder, and a wide band of metal across my left bicep. Large, overlapping segments covered my spine in a manner similar to a dragon's scales. Thick, heavy bracers were now strapped to my forearms, attached to a sort of finger-less glove with plating for the back of my paws and the knuckles. There were two thigh-plates on my legs, and metal wrappings for my lower shins, with extensions to cover the top of my lower paws. A three-point harness, connected a the waist be a new belt and wrapped under the shoulder plate, held it all together. Bellows had even cut holes in the coif for my ears to poke through. In short, I looked like a complete and utter bad-ass. But something was missing...

"Is there anything I can wear over this? I'm used to having a shirt or something." My ragged, stained sweatshirt had actually fallen apart while I waited for the armor.

"Give me a second." The smith retreated from the forge into a nearby closet and came back with a large sheet of tough, green cloth that he wrapped around my shoulders into a hooded toga. I made the obligatory cuts in the hood for my ears, and stepped back to admire myself.

"What is this?" I asked him, intruiged by the garment, feeling it between .

"Spidersilk tablecloth. The wife doesn't like it, doesn't go with the dishes or something ridiculous like that. So it's been out here for a while now." He snorted and shook his head. "Mares."

"Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em." Coconut quipped from where he'd been standing by the door.

A tablecloth? Well, if it works, it works. I was more than grateful for all the help, and both myself and Coconut thanked Bellows profusely before leaving.

But still, I couldn't help but feel a little strange under all the gear. It was heavy and uncomfortable, yes, but it was that armor only serves one purpose, and that is to prevent the wearer from being killed or injured. The fact that I was wearing it in Equestria, of all places, reminded me of how little I knew of this world.

We were halfway back to the barracks when a loud, screeching, horn-like blast shook the air for several seconds. It reminded me faintly of an air-raid siren, and it seemed to have an effect on the town in the way that one actually would. Ponies quickly dropped what they were doing, and the tension became thick.

"Look! To the north!" one called.

There, as if shot from a flare gun, a long, thin trail of smoke arced high over the watchtower, ending in a brightly pulsing orb of light. The wailing blast was repeated twice more, in three rapid bursts of noise each.

I turned to Coconut, who looked deathly afraid. "What's going on?"

The earthpony rolled his shoulders nervously, before galloping away to the wall. "We need to get to the wall, mate! It's Big Momma!"

Big Momma?

I tore after him, somewhat awkwardly due to the armor. We sped through the town as fast as we could, dodging ponies who were running around in one direction or another to seek shelter in nearby buildings. My paws thudded against the decking in a frenzied rhythm as I managed to keep pace with the smaller pony. Where he was able to weave through the crowd, more often than not I had to leap clear over groups of ponies, though fruitstands, and in the case of the bridges that joined together the wooden platforms, now acting like narrow choke-points, I chose instead to simply to vault across the gaps, my toga flapping wildly behind me.

Despite the panic and the confusion, we managed to reach the northern section of the wall. After ascending the staircase hammered into the inside curve, we came to a screeching halt next to the guard tower, where we found Captain Tythus and a group of guards at the edge, looking out.

"Ginger, give us a distance!" roared the captain.

Ginger's voice called down from the tower, now shrill with fear. "One and a half kilometers, sir! She's going to spot the work crews soon!"

I frowned and joined them at the edge, squinting hard to try and pick out what all the commotion was about. There, in the shimmering heat of the noonday sun, I made out movement.

"Coconut..."

The earth pony was at my side, nervously biting his lip.

"Why are those trees moving..."

"Those aren't trees, mate. That's Big Momma." His eyes, shrunk down, never left the horizon.

"...Hydra?"

"The hydra. Matriarch."

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

"Cloud Nine!" The captain barked. "Take all the pegasi here and begin air-lifting the ponies outside back into the walls. I don't care if you have to carry two at a time, just get it done! Get help from the town if you have to. We've got over fifty souls out there, and I'm not about to let them become lunch for that overgrown lizard."

"Baritone! Gather a crew together and be ready to close the gates on my mark. Ginger!" he called up to the tower.

A cinnamon head, capped by a fiery red mane, poked out over the edge. "Y-yes, sir?"

"Your time to shine, so suit up! You know what to do. Seven kilometer minimum, leave her with something that'll burn long enough this time, do you understand me?" At her weak salute, Tythus turned, eyes scouring the assembled ponies before setting on me.

"You're outfitted. Good. You'll be going with Ginger Snap. She'll explain when she's down here." With that, he turned and began hurriedly exchanging a rapid discussion with Sparky, who had just arrived at the scene, the twitchy unicorn mare panting heavily from the run from the barracks.

Well, shit.

I plunked myself down on the ramparts and quickly looked over my armor, making sure everything was tight and snug. I began one of my oldest habits, that of a round of joint cracking. It helped me relax in the face of severe stress, I usually got some kind of sick satisfaction from how it annoyed anyone nearby. I started with my knuckles first, followed by my wrists, then elbows, working my way up to my shoulders and spine, before finally wrenching my head to one side, sighing as my neck cracked like bubble wrap.

It sounded more like the drumroll at a hanging.

"What the hay is that?" Daring nervously asked as she peered out the window of the room she had booked in the inn.

Disarray, who was busy examining a chessboard on the other side of a table, frowned and moved his black queen forward into the open.

"Signal flare," the draconequus moodily replied, before giving a thoughtful snort, small burst of smoke shooting from his dragon nostrils. "For the hydras. And judging by the size of it, they've spotted a big one. Our furry friend may have to be called in to lure it away."

Daring swallowed, eyes narrowing in determination. "We've got to help him! Nopony should have to face a hydra alone."

"Oh, goody! I've always wanted to be turned into a steaming pile of hydra dung," Disarray replied flatly. A single glare from the pegasus silenced him, however. He sighed, "But as it's not like I've anything else to do..."

He suddenly snapped his fingers, and a backpack like object appeared over his shoulders.

"Daring, grab my tail!"

The explorer hesitated for a moment, before chomping down on the thick, kangaroo tail.

Disarray slammed a big red button on his chest, and the backpack sprang open to reveal two flat purple wings made of metal, lights blinking softly on the tip. A high-pitched whine began screaming out of the bottom, accompanied by a small stream of blue fire.

Daring was about to say something when he struck a heroic pose, one bear fist clenched to the sky.

"To Infinity, and Beyond!"

With a mechanical roar, Daring was ripped from the ground, suddenly rocketing away at a speed she'd never been able to achieve before, crashing through the roof and punching through several clouds. She debated screaming in terror, but that would mean letting go.

To hay with that, she wanted to live.

The draconequus smiled as he leveled out his standard-issue Star Command booster pack, adjusting a pair of goggles that had magically appeared over his face as the pair screamed across the sky. And so it begins... he thought to himself.

(15) Top of the Food Chain

Creeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaa-kaBOOM!

I swallowed nervously as the gates shut behind me, sealing the town up like a safe. My tail reflexively tucked itself between my legs, betraying just how tense I was, despite the sanguine way I try to carry myself in these circumstances. The armor I wore itched a little in the hot sun, and I found myself uncontrollably panting due to the heat. The almost-frantic energy coming off of Ginger, standing next to me, wasn't helping in the slightest. I frowned and put on my game face. For better or for worse, it was time.

The fiery mare to my left made a few more adjustments to her own armor, a lighter, thinner version of the standard guard getup, but without a helmet and with a flexible, segmented back plate. It had originally been silver, but it was now covered in a smoky, dull film that reminded me of the appearance of a piece of chromed metal put over a fire. I didn't want to know how it got that way, but I assumed I was going to find out, anyway. It was made for movement, for mobility, and for increasing the chances of the wearer not getting entire limbs bitten off.

Oh, goody.

With a grunt and without bothering to see if I was following, Ginger hoofed the ground once before breaking into a steady gallop. I lurched into motion behind her, setting into an easy lope, my long legs eating up the turf to quickly catch up to her.

If there's anything I've learned about putting yourself in the path of certain death or pain, it's that if you think about it too much, you'll chicken out, every time. I'd never even dreamed of doing anything like this on Earth, but, as we all know, shit happens. I'd been in several dangerous situations, yes, but they'd always been unexpected or extremely sudden. Sometimes both. In every case, I had no time to think. I simply reacted. For example...

Getting shot at in some god-forsaken desert at the ends of the earth...

Falling through the top floor of an abandoned tenement building I was exploring with a buddy...

Caught in an avalanche while carving up the backcountry on my trusty snowboard...

Sailboat capsizing three miles offshore in a storm...

It's not that I was accident prone, mind you. On the contrary, I am usually quite coordinated under normal circumstances. It just seems that extreme things just love to occur to me, or around me.

Or, if the Chili Cookoff last year was anything go by, inside me.

By the gods, that poor, innocent toilet was never really the same...

We set out northwest, and we had some distance to cover before we'd encounter the object of our endeavor. Our objective was quite simple, really. All we had to do was lure Big Momma far enough away from Wethoof so that she wouldn't present any danger to the town. It was exactly what we'd be doing when we launched our strike, except this would be practice, in a sense. A few, the more aggressive guards, had asked why we simply hadn't opted to simply attack her with the recently-refurbished catapults and charges and be done with it.

"We aren't ready." Was all Tythus would say on the matter. And that was that.

My paws beat out a soft rapport on the dusty plain, occasionally swerving or taking to the air to avoid some of the great tracks left by the deforestation. I began to clear my mind, as best as I could. It wasn't easy, let me tell you. Something would grab hold and say, what if this happens? What if this goes wrong? What if... I violently shook my head, scattering the flurry of doubts like leaves in the wind, leaving behind a blissfully calm center, a mental "eye of the storm," if you will.

Ginger set the pace. For a while, there was peace, simply the noises of running, of breathing, of the wind whistling in the distant grasslands, of the soft tinkling of armor as it clattered against itself. And then, on the horizon, looming out of the heat waves like a mighty oasis, Big Momma appeared. I actually stumbled as I realized just how big the hydra was.

Even from this distance, one could tell she was massive, slowly plodding toward us like a myth from an ancient legend. A rotund, barrel chest, tapering into a stubby, muscular tail the diameter of a cement mixer. Two pillar-like legs, as large as the columns of the temples of the Greek gods. Four weaving, bobbing, sinewy necks, stretching up so tall, they seemed to scrape the sky. Each head was angled, blunt, spade-shaped, with red frills along the jaws, fangs as big as myself, and enormous, red reptilian eyes that almost glowed with malevolence. Everything was covered in a snakelike hide of greenish-brown layered scales.

They called her Big Momma, but "big" didn't even come close to it. The scaly bitch was monolithic!

I almost pissed myself, right then and there. Are we seriously going to try and get that thing to chase us?

Ginger picked up the pace. We were now traveling at her full speed, which was quite fast. Her horn began glowing, periodically shooting out green sparks in a manner similar to flint on steel. She gave me a look over her shoulder. She was just as scared as I was.

"Come on, they're counting on us!" she cried, narrowing her eyes and pulling ahead, the magic coming out of her horn suddenly igniting into an intense green blaze. Her coat began changing color, from a tan cinnamon to the same color of an active heating coil on a stove. Her mane started moving weirdly, flickering and dancing like fire. The ground where her hooves landed became charred and blackened.

She was putting out a tremendous amount of heat, so much so that I had to change my path to prevent the fur on my face from being singed, due to the fact that I was running downwind of her. I swallowed nervously and re-quashed the surge of fear and doubt that had crept into my mind. Adrenaline - my oldest ally, my oldest nemesis - kicked in at that moment, sending a powerful burst of energy screaming through my system.

I have to get myself under control! Come on, man! Stop thinking about it! It's for the ponies of Wethoof! For Tythus and the guards, for Coconut and Baritone and Cloud Nine and Sparky and Ginger! It's because you made a promise, and you never, ever break a promise! For Equestria! For Narnia! For Science! For Daring Do! You can do this, just stop thinking about it!

"One-thousand meters!" Ginger yelled back.

DON'T THINK!

The hydra loomed closer. Big Momma's many heads suddenly pricked up. It had noticed the approaching inferno.

"Eight hundred!"

DON'T THINK!

One of the heads let out a terrible, bellowing roar.

"S-Six hundred!"

Don't think!

Big Momma leaned forward, increasing her massive stride, homing in on us.

"Four hundred! Echo! Make heat!"

Don't think...

Scales and teeth, the shaking ground.

"Two hundred! ECHO!"

There was a flurry of movement, a dull snapping noise, followed by a scream of pain.

And then, I stopped thinking. Once again, I became a machine. Machines don't have time to think. They simply act.

Ginger Snap took another gasping breath as she galloped at top speed, the thundering steps of the hydra approaching. Too fast. She grit her teeth, and her output of magic increased dramatically, causing all of the nearby grass to abruptly wilt and blacken. She felt like her horn was burning a hole through the top of her skull, but she kept on, blazing across the flat ground like a comet come to earth.

And then she tripped.

The pothole snuck up on her, hidden under a tangle of scrubby weeds, swallowing up her hoof and wrenching it violently, causing her to slam into the dust. Her concentration evaporated in an instant, the halo of flames surrounding her vanishing. She let out a pained screech as she tried rolling out of the fall, only to discover her foreleg bent at an unnatural angle. Her eyes widened in sudden terror as the impact of her situation dawned on her. She was dazed, injured, and unable to fight back, a hydra matriarch was bearing down on her, and that accursed Diamond Dog, the only other thing out here, had slipped into some kind of daze with one thousand meters to go.

Big Momma lumbered ever onward, her incredible bulk coming forth towards her. There was no stopping her, she was just too big. A mountain with legs. She'd failed. After it finished with her, the innocent lives outside the walls of Wethoof were next...

Ginger laid down in the dirt, and began closing her eyes, resigning herself to fate. So this is how it all ends, she thought. Despite herself, she was strangely relaxed, almost... at peace. Maybe it won't be so bad. It'll be quick, at least. Maybe I'll finally get to see Mother, now...

She decided that the last thing she should see would be the the clouds, those sweet, warm balls of fluff she once loved so much. It was fitting, in a way. Might as well end her life with something beautiful, to make up for all the ugly it had been filled with. Ginger rolled over onto her back to take in the last thing she would ever see. The hydra was mere steps away. It wouldn't be long now. Something flickered on the edge of her vision.

Where did the sun go...?

Ginger blinked in surprise. It was that crazy Diamond Dog, silhouetted against the sun as he leaped high over Ginger's fallen form. The sunlight flashed and glittered off his armor, but it was his claws that drew the most attention. All eight lengths, now turned into brilliantly flaming spikes of heat and light, left an eerie, ghostly contrails as the biped arced across the sky, completing an almost-lazy flip to whip out a single forearm, fist tightly bunched, with all the force of a runaway train.

The hydra and the Diamond Dog collided directly over Ginger's head with a sickening crunch. There was a bellowing rumble of pain, and something heavy landed in the dust several feet away.

Big Momma, now sporting a massive bruise in the middle of her gargantuan chest, had been halted in her tracks by the sheer force of the blow.

Ginger blinked, trying to make sense of it all. The thing that had landed in front of her, now revealed to be the mutt, quickly spun and tore her off the ground, slinging her across one powerful shoulder and taking off at a blistering pace, careening right under the hydra's legs as the four heads roared in pain and attempted to pursue. In the instant she could see his face, she noticed that his pupils, once round, had become slitted, and shone with a feral power that she'd only seen in normal Diamond Dogs. She unconsciously wrapped her good leg around his neck, clinging tightly to avoid falling off. He smelled like earth and sweat and fear. A lot of fear. Why had he bothered to save her after how she treated him? Ginger briefly wondered just what the hay was going through his mind before her consciousness began to flicker. She shuddered and tightened her grip.

RUN AWAAAAAAAAAAY!

Oh Jesus, God, Allah, Zeus, Odin, Vishnu, Buddha, Ra, Princess Luna, and Stephen Colbert...

SAVE MEEEEEE-E-E-E-E!

As I regained higher brain function, I was completely shocked once I'd realized what I'd just done. I had no idea I'd had that in me; that completely idiotic, showboating stunt I'd just pulled, and now I was paying for it. Fuck not thinking anymore! Fuck being a machine! I want to live, dammit! I risked a glance over the shoulder that Ginger wasn't latched onto, eyes widening in terror as Big Momma finally managed to turn her fat ass around and give chase. An earsplitting screech erupted from all four heads, sounding like a mix between a Screamo concert with crappy speakers and Godzilla on steroids. A lot of steroids.

Oh, hell no!

LUDICROUS SPEED! GO!

I kicked my body into maximum overdrive, accelerating beyond anything I've ran before, pelting across the ground with my tail tucked between my legs like a puppy meeting the mailman for the first time.

Well, at least she's following me. Now all I have to do is lead her away... but where?

I decided to simply keep heading in the direction we'd set out in - northwest. A quick peek at the sun pointed me in the right direction, and I tore off towards the distant forest, over which a cloud bank was ominously hanging. I tightened my jaw and pressed on.

Big Momma was deceptively fast, and when I finally hit the treeline, she was still in hot pursuit. I staggered for a few precious seconds as my paw caught on a root, before fleeing in terror as the massive hydra completely crushed a nearby bush flatter than a coin.

The scents of the rainforest flooded my nose, and I honestly wished that I'd more time to savor them. Ginger let out a soft grunt as I ripped through a section of brambles, before tumbling down into a wide, hidden gully, once home to a mighty river, now dried and packed. I managed to keep my footing, though, and raced along the bank of a small trickle. The sound of the hydra's chase was being blasted throughout the otherwise tranquil forest, causing a nearby pack of monkeys to start shrieking in terror as it knocked over another huge tree somewhere behind me.

And so, we carried on like that for a long while, sprinting down the dead river as I followed its path through the forest.

The gully suddenly opened up into a grassy clearing, a flock of colorful birds rising into the air the moment I rushed in. A gently-sloping knoll took up the center of the space, topped with a small crater, like an anthill. My eyes flashed with recognition, memories that were not my own suddenly pouring through my mind. I slowed to a stop, breathing hard.

Even though the forest had begun claiming back what had once been open, this place hadn't changed much in the eight years since I'd seen it - or rather, when Ginger had seen it. I risked another glance behind me. That gully I'd followed... had once been a path.

Somehow, I'd ended up at the old Greenclaw den.

I noticed a couple more trees being felled in the distance. Big Momma was coming, and fast. This place should be far enough to try and lose the trail.

"No... no. We shouldn't be here," Ginger mumbled in a pained daze, now shivering violently. She was probably going into shock from her injury. I craned my neck and took a quick peek at it. Her foreleg was weirdly twisted in an unnatural direction, and the sight of a small white tip of bone poking out from her cinnamon coat made me a little nauseous.

Experience from rugby had presented me with all kinds of injuries like these, a couple to myself. I frowned for a bit as I recalled some information on this particular kind of break. Crap! Not good. An open fracture - those could get infected very easily. I had to get her back to Wethoof as soon as possible for treatment.

I shook my head in frustration, trying to tune out the noise of the approaching monster. There was one guaranteed way I could shake the hydra off our tracks. As much as I hated to think it, I couldn't come up with anything better.

Down, into the caves.

Ginger seemed to sense this as I began jogging up the hill. "I can't be here." Abruptly, her weight disappeared off my back. She'd let go. I whirled around to see her groaning in pain as she desperately tried to limp away.

Big Momma finally caught up, and lurched into the clearing, easily flattening even more trees in her wake of destruction. Four pairs of eyes latched onto us. Four mouths opened wide. Four, earth-shaking, knee-knocking, make-you-shit-yourself-in-fear, vision-blurring, bestial roars issued forth from each maw.

At that moment, something incredibly unlikely happened.

"COWABUNGA, DUDES!" With a woosh and the whine of an engine, the familiar figure of a certain draconequus, accompanied by a tannish-gold pegasus, clamping down on his tail with all her jaw strength, screeched to a halt directly in front of the hydra's four, now very confused heads.

Daring Do let go, and shakily fluttered to the ground beside me, exhausted.

"Never. Again!" she gasped.

The hell...?

Disarray, still hovering before the hydra from a jetpack of some kind, coughed politely, and began to speak. "The path of the righteous is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil." He began slowly, turning in the air to address each of the dumbstruck hydra's faces. "Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost foals. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name when I lay my vengeance upon thee!"

No.

Freaking.

Way.

"But who am I, you ask? Well, I'll tell you. My name is Disarray Entropius of the Royal Family of Equestria!" He clapped all four limbs together, and in each appendage, a musketeer sword appeared, each of which he twirled around with an artful flourish. "Fear me - if you dare!"

Big Momma suddenly came to her senses, and let loose another blast of rage into Disarray's face, blowing him backwards several feet and extinguishing the ethereal, rainbow mustache like a candle in a rouge wind. The draconequus grimaced and distastefully wiped a large glob of saliva from his face, and his colorful facial hair re-ignited.

"Man, you need a Tic-Tac or something, 'cause your breath STINKS!" he calmly announced.

With that, he pivoted and flew down, skimming the grass as he sped towards me, nabbing Ginger with one lobster claw, Daring in a bear paw, and simply grabbing me by the hood with his mouth as he rocketed up into the sky, completing an impressive loop-de-loop before zipping through the entrance of the den.

The lack of sunlight was the first thing I noticed as Disarray zoomed through a perfectly rounded tunnel, followed by a rather pleasant scent of earth and stone. The sounds of the enraged hydra faded into the distance as we continued on, ever downwards. The former Prince of Equestria suddenly decided that he'd gone far enough, and abruptly braked, hard, and we came to a rest on the tunnel floor. Cracked and faded gemstones, spaced evenly down the tunnel's roof, dimly flickered like extremely old fluorescent lights, providing enough illumination to see by.

At least we were away from that thrice-dammed hydra. With the first half of the mission completed, all the remained was to get back to Wethoof as quickly as possible.

He set Ginger and Daring as gently as possible, before simply tossing me onto the floor. I glared up at him and rubbed my ass, now somewhat sore. He looked bigger, now somewhere in-between my height and Daring's. With a snap of his fingers, the rocket pack attached to his backside winked out of existence. He yawned and cracked his spine, adding somewhat moodily, "I'm getting too damn old for this. Well, now that we're all he-AUGH!"

A lance of green fire rushed into his chest, knocking him into the other wall. Ginger staggered up onto three legs, the tip of her horn still smoldering. She seemed to have recovered, either by an adrenaline boost of her own or sheer willpower. "Get back, demon!" she hissed. "I may be weakened, but you'll not take me without a fight!"

Daring Do came up in front of her, wings flared threateningly as she stood in-between the two "Whoa, there. He's not going to hurt us."

"It's a draconnequus, a spreader of disharmony and chaos!" Ginger growled, fierce green eyes boring into Daring's own deep magenta gaze. "A monster!"

"A very singed monster," Disarray quipped from where he rose from being sprawled on the sloping curve of the tunnel, brushing off ash and dust. "Nice to meet you, too," he said, plucking a smoking piece of plumage from his feathered backside.

Ginger's horn flared up again, and she adopted as threatening of a position as she could, before she stumbled to her side and fell, severely handicapped by her broken leg.

"That thing just attacked us!" she grunted in pain from her new position on the ground.

"If by 'attacked' you mean 'saved', then yes. Yes he did." I stood up to my full height, towering over them all as I nonchalantly shook off my toga and adjusted the hood. "Thanks for that, by the way" I added to him.

Disarray shrugged. "What are friends for?"

"It was my idea..." Daring grouched to nopony in particular, as she shrugged off her saddlebags and began rooting through them.

Ginger gawped at us. "You're friends with it?"

" 'It' has a name, you know," said Disarray.

"This is Disarray. He is a friend of mine, and he is not your enemy." I introduced the two.

"But it's... he's a draconequus!"

"No, really?" quipped Disarray. "I hadn't noticed. Thank you, Captain Obvious, Protector of the Things We Already Know! Now I can finally look in the mirror and say 'Gee! Now I know what I am! I'm just so happy right now I could just about die,'" he finished flatly, before cringing a little under my scolding gaze.

"Just because somepony looks a certain way doesn't mean you should judge them for it," Daring stated, momentarily pulling her head out from her saddlebags. She pointed a wing to me. "He's a Diamond Dog. Does he act like one?"

"No... but-!"

"-Then stop trying to kill him and say you're sorry. We all need to work together to get home. Key word there, 'Together' "

Ginger grimaced, as if she had swallowed something particularly slimy and foul-tasting. Disarray sat up expectantly, flourishing one paw before putting it to his draconian ear. "I'm waaaaaaaaaiiiiiting!" he sang.

"Oh, and I'd like an apology too." Daring removed strips of gauze and a small, wooden rod. "You almost killed me as well when you wouldn't let Fluffy here into town."

"Stop calling me that," I grumbled.

Then stop being so fluffy," she retorted, and rubbed the top of my head with one hoof. My tail, a traitor to the very last, began thumping into the floor. I humphed and half-heartedly smacked her hoof away. What can I say? It feels good to get a nice rub every once and a while.

"I'd like one as well, please. No offense, but you've been kind of mean. You know. Just a little." I said, as I forced my tail to behave itself. We all expectantly looked at Ginger, who was busy gazing at us with complete and utter disbelief.

"You are all completely crazy!" she finally moaned in frustration.

"Yes, and this crazy mare is the only one here who knows how to get you back on your hooves." Daring Do calmly tossed the ball of gauze up and down with one wing. "This crazy mare also remembers a certain night where she was bleeding and hurt, much like yourself, and was refused any help. And if you don't apologize to her for that, she just might do a very bad job of fixing your leg. Because she's crazy."

Ginger flinched at this, and hissed in pain as her leg moved.

"Daring is the best qualified to help you, Ginger. I would have died had it not been for her." I ran a claw across the gleaming white part in the fur on my neck for emphasis. "And, she is kind of crazy," I added, wincing as Daring lightly slapped me with a free wing.

Ginger gave each of us a hard stare, one at a time, ending with Disarray, whom she spent quite a long time looking at. After several baited moments, she finally sighed, and lowered her head to the floor in defeat.

"Fine. I'm... sorry for attacking the draconequus. I mean, Disarray," she said very quickly.

"Aaaaaaaaaaand?" prompted Disarray, twiddling his thumbs and batting his eyelashes, a gesture that looked completely ridiculous on his dragon-like face.

"And... I'm sorry for endangering your life, Daring." Her mumble was barely audibly, despite the silence of the cave.

"Aaaaaaaaaaand?"

She paused, closing her eyes to hide her shame. "...I'm sorry for treating Echo so poorly. I was wrong for doing that."

I coughed politely.

She hesitated again. I couldn't begin to imagine how hard this was for her. "...Um, and thanks. You know. For saving me back there."

Damn straight, son! Gotta have my props!

Satisfied with the apology, Daring Do approached the fallen unicorn and offered her a small red vial. "For the pain," she said. Ginger took it and swigged the entire thing down, murmuring her thanks before shuddering and slumping to the floor, her eyelids flickering in drowsiness. Daring gathered her materials and set to work on the leg, while Disarray and I began to get our bearings.

From Ginger's memory spell, I knew the general layout of the den. I could only recall one entrance, however, and that was the one we'd come in. Leaving the same way was out of the question, as Big Momma was still out there, and probably still quite pissed off.

I set off down the gently-sloping tunnel, brushing a finger over the walls. The floor of the cave was pitted with shallow, smooth depressions that my pads easily slipped into, as if they'd been made to fit in them. I somberly realized that these were ancient pawprints, made by generations upon generations of Diamond Dogs traveling the same path as I. How old was this place? There was history in these caves. But so much had been lost when the Greenclaws had been wiped out, by a combination of an enraged Frost Snap and whatever the hell had caused them to resort to kidnapping.

Despite the instinctual comfort I felt of being underground, there was something eerily wrong about this place. It felt like I was walking through a graveyard at night, and if I made too much noise I'd upset the spirits resting beneath the dirt. Disarray seemed to notice this as well, and elected to creep along at my side. I gave him another glance. He'd grown, all right. Then again, he was well over two-thousand years old, and until recently, trapped inside a magical prison. He had some catching up to do. The rapid growth could be expected. Maybe this is what happened to Princess Luna when she came back from the moon? That would explain the change in appearance from season 1 to season 2. Then again, she'd spent only half the time he had in isolation. His changes would be more extreme, or so I deduced.

At every fork in the tunnel, I attempted to use the left path. After all, this place had been excavated with this simple rule, "Left is Up, Right is Down." However, in every single branch, a collapse would halt my progress. All the tunnels except the main one seemed to be sealed off.

"I smell evil." Disarray broke the silence after about ten minutes of walking.

I continued onwards. "You smell like it?"

"No. I smell it. Sniff, Fluffy. Your nose should be stronger than mine."

I inhaled deeply through my nose, bringing in the scents of the earth. Underlying that was the sickly sweet, cloying stench of death, still detectable after eight years. I inhaled again, just to make sure. Another scent, fainter than all the others, registered in my brain. It was unlike anything I'd ever smelled before -there was no way to describe it- but my nose wrinkled immediately in reaction to it. My Diamond-Dog brain instinctively told me what it was.

It smelled like corruption.

And it was close by.

I sank back down to all fours, anxiously sniffing the floor. Disarray noticed this, and snickered, "What is it, girl? Timmy's fallen down the well?"

I smacked him upside the head.

"Ow! Hey! Come on, that was a good one!"

Ignoring his protests, I increased my pace padding softly through the murky tunnels, nose to the floor. The scent was barely detected by my nose, sometimes so faint I'd lose it, and have to double back. Occasionally, we'd encounter a fork in the tunnel, and every time, the trail would continue downwards down to the right. After five of these splits, I decided to head back. I could already guess where the trail led.

When we got back, Daring was waiting for us. "Find anything?" She was all too eager to scope the place out, despite the circumstances. I couldn't help but grin at this; she had a bit of a one-track mind.

"There's a large cavern further down, but I've got a bad feeling about it." My misgivings were well put. Dark deeds had been committed in that place.

The explorer frowned, before turning and nudging the mare who was just now coming awake from the potion. Ginger's eyes sluggishly opened, and she groaned as she seemed to remember where she was and who she was with.

Her leg, formerly twisted like a bent piece of metal, had been straightened, bound to a straight length of wood that Daring had brought in her saddlebags. The entire leg was wrapped in gauze, and even from here I could smell the various salves and potions that had been used on it. Daring must have set the bone back. Good.

"Ginger, do you know any other way out of this place?" Daring asked her as she slowly sat up.

Ginger hesitated for the briefest of seconds before vigorously shaking her head.

I narrowed my eyes. "I know what being back here must be like for you, but we need to get back to Wethoof. There's no way we can go back the way we came, and I can guess that the Greenclaws weren't stupid. There must have been another way out of here. We need your help. I need your help."

Ginger mumbled something, unwilling to meet my gaze.

"Please." Once again, I found myself at her mercy, despite everything. Would she help us, even if it meant having to help a Diamond Dog, in the very place where her mother had been kidnapped and killed by one?

"There is one way," she began, slowly and softly. "But I don't think it would be usable..." She thought for a moment, her brow furrowed in thought. "When my father was young, he would occasionally meet up with Mosspaw," she spat the word out like she'd swallowed some Windex, "But the Alpha at the time, as well as the mayor of Wethoof, didn't like that very much. So they had a secret place. A hidden tunnel, dug by the pair of them, that runs from the outskirts of Wethoof to the den. He showed me the entrances when I was little, as they had no need to be secret once the leadership had changed on both ends..."

A secret tunnel, straight back to town? "And you didn't think to tell anyone about this until now?"

"This place is empty for a reason!" she retorted. "Ponies shouldn't be here. And Diamond Dogs shouldn't be in Wethoof."

I brushed that one off with about as much effort as swatting a fly. Her words were weak, where they should have been backed with spite. "How do we get to this tunnel from here?"

She grimaced, before finally saying, "We have to go down."

"To the cavern?" Daring asked tentatively.

"Further." The word struck my ears with all the weight of a falling guillotine. Why did that feel like such a bad idea?

There was silence for a moment, before Daring Do cheerfully sprang up. "Well, then! No point in wasting time here! Let's go find that tunnel!" She slung her saddlebags over her back and cocked her signature pith helmet back at a jaunty angle, before rising off the ground with a single wingbeat at moving off down the tunnel. Disarray shrugged and followed her, both pairs of arms clasped firmly behind his back as he strolled after her.

"Wait, how am I going to come with you? I can't even walk... -hey!" Was all Ginger managed before I scooped her up and laid her on my left shoulder, the one not covered by an armored plate. "Put me down! I don't need your help."

"You didn't seem to complain about it before." I ignored her protests and began to follow Daring.

Her mouth clamped shut at that, and her face turned red with a furious blush. The spidersilk toga she was pressed against began to smoulder for the briefest of seconds, before she once again swallowed her pride, grumbling softly all the while.

As we descended past the point I'd turned back, the air became cool and wet. From the ceiling, the tiny beginnings of stalactites, mere nubs at this point, had begun to form. Water would drip down from them on occasion, fat droplets splattering onto the rocky stone floor. This water would begin a slow, trickling descent down the slanted tunnel, keeping pace with us as we traveled.

Eventually, the tiny rivulet became wider and deeper, to the point where it had begun to carve the cave floor by the tiniest of degrees. It cleanly bisected the tunnel, forcing us to use one side or the other to avoid wet hooves or paws. I scratched my chin thoughtfully. The scientist inside me squee'd with delight. A lot of knowledge about Equestrian geoscience could be gathered from this place.

Then tunnel opened up, suddenly, abruptly, like ripping off a band-aid in one go. I found myself in a place that was eerily familiar, even though this was the first time I'd set paw in here.

The stalactites and stalagmites were as thick as trees, here. From the blackness of the cavern roof, they hung ominously. Some were big enough to join together, creating thin, rocky pillars that stretched up into the dark infinity. The few glowing gems in this place were few and far between. A few had expired completely. It was dark and damp and smelled like evil.

Perfect...

Ginger stiffened and began shuddering softly, her ears laid flat against her skull, and her good foreleg covering her eyes. She was muttering something under her breath in a harried whisper, so low that even my sensitive hearing couldn't pick it up. Poor girl.

The water was here, as well. From the tunnel, it spread out over the floor of the cavern, leaving no dry areas. It looked like it was gathering into a static, underground lake, but I could feel it moving under my pads. Daring seemed to sense this as well, and led us further on, following the path of the water. Water always flows down, after all. That's where we needed to go.

"You smell that?" Daring had stopped suddenly.

I paused and tested the air. It smelled exactly the same as before, except stronger. Wait, there was something else... I couldn't place it though, so I shrugged in response, unwilling to use my claws to speak, which I could tell would cast the most frightening kind of shadows in this place.

The experienced explorer disappeared behind a pillar for one moment. There was the sound of metal sliding against rock. She emerged from the dimness with something in her mouth. She approached me and spat it out, holding the object up with a wingtip.

I took it in my free paw, the one that wasn't keeping Ginger in place. It was a spear, of all things. The haft was rotted and warped and moldy, but the spearhead itself glimmered in the little light there was, still sharp and unblemished. My eyes widened in shock as I realized just what this was.

Before the terrible battle that had occurred here, Mosspaw had tossed aside his spear in favor of tooth and claw. With a solemn respect and a twinge of irony, I gripped the old weapon tightly. I recognized it from Ginger's memories, still buzzing around under the surface of my mind. This had been the weapon of the Alpha, the pack leader.

"I could smell the rotting wood. Not exactly something you'd find down in a place like this, huh?" Daring explained. "Found it stuck in the rock. Good thing too - had it been lying down, the water might have completely rotted the wood away and carried the head off."

I nodded at this, thinking hard, as Daring wheeled about and flew on with soft wings. How strange the world was. The weapon itself was completely useless right now, I'd need to replace the haft with something. But still... of all the things I could have come across. This?

Fate was a curious thing to me. I wasn't a believer of it. And yet, I secretly hoped that it existed. Maybe this was just coincidence. Maybe it was pure luck. Maybe it was destiny. Maybe it was magic.

Either way, I didn't care. It felt right in my paw, and that's all that mattered.

We continued on our way, through the stone towers and pillars that seemed more like trees. I couldn't help but chuckle a little at that. An underground forest? Preposterous! And yet, here I was, splishing and splashing through inch-high water in the belly of the earth.

Disarray appeared at my side, lazily backstroking through the air as if swimming.

"How strange," he mused.

I gave him a questioning look, the butt of the spear making thunk-thunks into the watery floor as I padded along.

"How you try so hard to be different from your kind, and yet end up embodying them." He pointed a lobster claw at the spear. "You look very ferocious with that, by the way."

I snorted with amusement at this. "Humans, or D-Dogs?"

"In your case, both." He cackled softly at this. "Each of these races travel a path, and very rarely do they change course. But you? No, you have a choice. You find yourself in a wood, on a long and winding road. It forks into two. Which will you take, the path more or less traveled? Of course, we'd all like to say the path less traveled, wouldn't we?"

"And which would you pick?"

"Oh, me? I'd burn the forest down. Regrow it with more than one path. Perhaps I could make a maze? Straight paths are so overrated anyway. And what about you? What would our noble adventurer chose?"

I stepped over a small piece of rubble on the ground, before answering. "I'd make make my own."

"Quite a rebel, aren't we?" A black leather jacket winked into existence over his form, accompanied by a pair of aviators. "Fight the man, man!" he proclaimed.

"Not a rebel. Just curious about the forest. There are some things you can't see from the trail."

Disarray looked like he had something to say to that, but bit it back. His costume vanished, and he lapsed into a brooding silence.

We heard Daring yell something from up ahead. She'd gotten far away from us while we spoke. Increasing my stride, I hurried along Ginger, who had been constantly shivering this entire time, suddenly stilled and ceased her whispering, ears pricked.

"This is it," she said softly.

Indeed it was. We'd reached the end of the cavern, a solid wall of stone. Daring was waiting for us, impatiently examining the smooth surface.

"What gives? I thought you said we had to keep going down? There's no way down from here," The explorer stated.

"Look at the water," Ginger stated.

The flow had indeed increased, tickling the small hairs on my paws and creating a small suction-like sensation as it traveled past. It hit the wall, and gathered against it, like the tilted end of one bathtub. In one spot, however, it dipped downwards into the stone, where the floor met the wall, seemingly disappearing through solid rock.

"There's a secret passage there. A door."

I approached the wall and stood before it, in almost a foot of liquid by now, rushing past my legs into a hidden crack in the stone. I placed my paws on it, feeling out the surface. Sure enough, I felt two hairline grooves. I braced myself against the stone and sank my claws into it, the lengths traveling roughly through the earth. With a heave, I pulled as hard as I could, muscles straining and heaving. There was a rumbling sound...

...And nothing happened.

Ginger groaned from her position on my shoulder. "Push, not pull," she said.

I totally knew that!

I reversed my efforts and pressed hard into the rock. Another rumbling noise commenced, and a rough, half-oval shape appeared as the grooves increased. The entire shelf of stone was suddenly pushed backwards, and swung to the side, as if on hinges. The water surged forward into the gap, spilling into another tunnel, this one pitch-black and much smaller from the one we'd come here in. It looked like there was room for me if I hunched over a little.

Daring rummaged around again in her saddlebags and produced a torch, which she struck against the wall. It sparked to life, bathing us in a wonderfully powerful glare. She hopped into the tunnel and gave us a wink. "First one topside is a rotten haybale!"

And with that, we set off into the darkness. It wouldnt have been so bad...

...Were it not for the fact that the door slammed shut behind us.

(16) Hellhound

The slamming rumble of the passage sealing off rattled my bones and made the small river at my feet jump into the air. Almost immediately, I found myself heaving and and struggling against it with all my strength. The stone didn't budge, no matter how hard I tried to force it.

"What the hay was that?" Daring cried, from her position at the front of the line. The tunnel only allowed us to travel one by one, such was its size. She shoved past Disarray, who merely leaned against a wall as she blew around him. I was almost bowled over, and had to duck down low, clasping Ginger to my shoulder as she tore over us.

With her torch in hoof, she examined the solid sheet of stone that had formerly marked the entrance to the cavern. Considerably dark mutterings could be heard, and after a few moments, swearing that could have made a sailor blush like a schoolgirl.

"Well, I guess it's a one-way trip from here," the explorer bluntly stated. "Why does this always seem to happen to me? Every time - it's a trap, or an ambush, or some kind of hidden passage. It's always something."

"Probably for dramatic effect." Disarray's declaration did little to lighten the mood, but Daring snorted with amusement nonetheless.

"Either way. We need to move forward. That's the only way to go, after all." She resumed her position at the head of the line, and we began to travel down the tiny cave. I had to travel on all fours now, and Ginger ended up lying across my back, with enough room to raise her head and look around.

The four of us continued on in this way: the intrepid Daring Do in the lead, stepping lightly through the water that swirled down the path; Disarray nonchalantly strolling along with arms clasped behind his back, as if he were simply taking a short tour through a park; myself, lumbering along like a skinny version of a grizzly bear, armor gently rattling with every step, a rotting spear thunking against the floor every few seconds; and Ginger, who was silently perched between my shoulder blades, barely having said a word since we came down here, eyes narrowed in thought about one thing or another.

The tunnel reminded me of a rough sewer, like the ones you'd find in a city on Earth. It was oval, not perfectly round, and the sides were far from smooth. Jagged edges of rock would gasp and tear at my sides if I strayed too far from the center, where I had to straddle the thin but fast stream that ran into the blackness ahead.

Of course, the lack of wading through a river of shit made a big difference.

That evil scent was even more powerful down here. It didn't have any particular odor to it, no. It simply evoked a that primordial instinct that said: this is bad - get the hell away. I could see it affecting the others, too. Daring's ears were twitching madly at the slightest noise, her charcoal and black tail swishing in an almost catlike manner of agitation. Disarray, despite his calm demeanor, was walking stiffly, as if he were made of metal and couldn't move smoothly.

I'd never had a problem with the dark. Usually, I welcomed nightfall. There's just something about a clear starlit sky that the daytime can never replicate. Maybe it's because it gives you a peek at the universe beyond your own - of stars and galaxies and nebulae, of supernovas and black holes and icy, frigid worlds that have no (and will never have) names. It makes one feel very small, but very lucky at the same time.

I'd never minded tight spaces, either. Hell, I'd woken up in Eqestria in something that resembled a coffin, of all things. Occasionally I would find myself purposefully seeking out places where all four walls could be touched without moving. A closet, or a large cabinet under the stairs, maybe. Maybe it's because that somehow reminded me of the womb, the safest place a being could be.

But this was completely different.

The walls weren't closing in, and the darkness wasn't stifling. But regardless, it felt wrong. It wasn't something that you thought about, you just knew.

The running water was playing havoc with my senses. The noise bounced off the cave walls endlessly, creating the impression that instead of a small stream, one was in the presence of a roaring torrent, about to burst it's banks. And through the false rumbling of the river, I could imagine I was hearing other things, as well. A faint pattering of feet, like a rat. Or a solid crack of a pebble hitting the stone floor.

Or even worse, the sound of another set of paws coming from behind me.

I would glance over my shoulder every time I heard it. When I'd stop, it would stop as well. I judged it to merely be the sound of my own steps, simply bouncing off the walls to the point where it sounded like another body was present. That would reassure me a little. Imagine! Being afraid of my own namesake! Echo, afraid of an echo! I'd never hear the end of it.

But still. I would keep checking. After what was probably the twentieth time of me doing so, and subsequently bumping my head on the cave wall, Ginger finally had enough.

"Get a hold of yourself, you puppy," she muttered from her perch. "There's far worse to be afraid of down here than the sound of your own paws."

"Besides!" Disarray quipped from ahead. "It's always the funny ones that go first. Namely, me. But in all honesty, though - if we find even one Boo down here, you guys are on your own."

I silently snickered in response, and kept on, trying to ignore the peculiar sensation that something else was matching my stride not six feet behind me, that something was there in the cave aside from us. Every time I had looked, nothing was there. It was just my imagination, acting up as usual. Right? Right. Nothing down here but dust and rock.

After a solid hour of walking, the line came to a halt. Before Daring's hooves, wooden planking began covering the floor of the cave for several yards before abruptly ending The flow spilled over several of these planks before sinking down in-between the cracks to some unknown destination. The wood itself was even more rotten than my spear, covered in a strange, luminescent mold and large, pasty white mushrooms.

"Easy, here. We don't know what this is covering up. Step as lightly as you can." Daring tentatively set a hoof on the warped surface, wincing as it sunk into the fungus and slime. She gradually worked her way onto the boards, until all four hooves rested uneasily on the rotting deck.

Slowly, ever so slowly, Daring Do set off down the cave, keeping low to the ground so as to spread her mass evenly. The wood creaked and groaned under her weight - at one point, a sharp splintering noise made everyone freeze - but it held.

"Disarray, you're next! Keep it slow, try to step where I did!" she called from the far side.

The draconequus jumped into the air and assumed a lazy reclining pose, floating serenely above the rocky floor. "Really, all this fuss is all for nau-AUGH!" he yelped, as he suddenly plummeted and smacked into the stone. Disarray slowly pulled himself off his rear end and grimaced.

"Well. That's interesting." He frowned and snapped his fingers.

Nothing happened.

"That's very interesting." He turned to me after thinking for a moment. "Echo, could you let out some of those massive steak-knives you call claws?"

I obliged, flexing my fingers and feeling the familiar sensation of bone sliding out of the tips. My eyes widened in shock as I saw that they weren't glowing anymore - they were back to the same, deep black as my rear ones, as if the contact with Disarray's essence had never occurred. I extended all of them, both paws. The same sight greeted me. No glow, no contrail, no magic. Just plain claw. It seemed I was back to being a mute.

"Disarray, what's going on?" Daring asked, from where she was standing some distance away. "My wings feel funny! Heavier, like they're suddenly made of something else."

"I'm... not entirely sure. There must be something nearby that's affecting my power." He thoughtfully pulled on his mustache. "Miss Ginger! If you would be so kind as to make some light for us?"

I felt Ginger shuffle around on my back. "Yeah. Sure." There was a sparking noise, followed by the grinding of teeth and a grunt of exertion. Then, "Hey! What gives! I can't use any magic!"

Disarray simply shrugged. "We must be close to something powerful. Something capable of absorbing magic. That's all I can say."

"I think I heard something about this once," Ginger said softly. "Where magic won't work. But I can't remember where..." I could almost hear the gears turning inside her head.

Meanwhile, Disarray lowered himself down to all six appendages, for all the world looking like some kind of mutated crab. He scuttled across the boards without so much as a pause, although the creaking and groaning were substantially louder.

"Alright! Now Ginger's up next!" Daring Do announced.

Once he had crossed, I craned an arm around and gently pulled Ginger off my backside. The unicorn hobbled around unsteadily on three legs, the broken one clutched tight to her chest. "Why can't I stay up there?" she asked. "I can barely walk!"

"Because Echo's a fat bag of lard!" Disarray called from the other side. "Don't want to make him to fall through!"

Ha-ha! And when I get over there, I'm going to break your spine and use you as a jump-rope! Funny!

After smacking the back of Disarray's head, Daring explained herself, "He's right - you're the biggest one here. Ginger's weight on top of that might break the planks."

Ginger grimaced as she placed a wavering hoof onto the planking. "Blech." She awkwardly clambered up and stood, wavering a little. After nervously eyeing the walkway for a few moments she began to limp across, as smoothly as she could manage.

She was about halfway when I realized something: Daring was a pegasus, she was extremely light and built for flying; Disarray had spread his weight across six points, two more than normal. Ginger was a unicorn, that meant she was heavier - I would know, she was riding on me - and on top of that, she was only using three hooves, which meant...

C-C-CRACK!

The board under Ginger's front hoof suddenly gave out, disintegrating into a mass of crumbling pulp and ooze. The mare's leg slipped through the gap, and she grunted in pain as she crashed into the decking, her free leg dangling through the gap. She struggled, but with her other forelimb broken, she was immobilized, stuck lying on her belly in the filth.

Daring sprang into action, cautiously stepping onto the boards in an attempt to save her.

SNAP! ERRRRRRRRRK!

The explorer tactfully retreated, grimacing and lashing her tail in agitation and helplessness. I saw her eyes widen with the light of an idea, and she whipped around to furiously rummage through her bags again.

"H-help!" Ginger cried, panic in her voice as she violently thrashed about, trying to free herself. All around her, the planks were suddenly sagging, bending as they warped under the frantic motions. The wood groaned as if it were alive.

My heart pounded a powerful tattoo into the inside of my skull. No time to think. Act!

I leaped out as far as I could, swatting Ginger towards the far side just as the planks finally gave way. I blew through the rotting wreckage like a wrecking ball, but somehow stopped myself from falling further by putting out my arms and and sinking my claws into the rock wall on either side of the gap. The spear I'd carried plummeted into the abyss, vanishing from sight. I now hung, arms straight out to either side, just barely able to put enough pressure on the walls to keep myself still.

Ginger rolled several feet, the wood collapsing all around her. She began to fall through once again when a violent wssh-crack! boomed through the cave. Daring's whip was now wrapped around her good foreleg, and she was dangling over the blackness of what looked to be a free fall. The explorer was standing on the edge of the hole, her whip held firmly through gritted teeth as she braced herself against the weight.

I slid down several inches, my claws losing purchase on the stone. I surprised myself by letting out a strangled, hoarse whine, the most my throat was capable of making. Daring strained an held fast, her face frozen in a scowl of determination. Abruptly, the boards under her hooves began to crumble, and she fell forward, slamming her stomach onto the lip, causing her to open her mouth to cry in pain. Disarray lunged and caught her tail, preventing her from falling any further.

Ginger plummeted like a rock, Daring's whip still lashed about her foreleg. I caught Daring's eye for another split second. Weirdly, I could see my own reflection in them.

My reflection gave me a reassuring look - and then let go.

I suddenly found myself falling into darkness. Before me, I could faintly see Ginger's form, silently spinning through the air. Assuming a diving position, I rocketed after her, catching up and swallowing her in a protective bear hug, before slamming into a sloped surface, which I violently bounced off, teeth rattling in my mouth, before roughly sliding down a rocky plane, my armor plates sparking and screeching against it like a train with bad brakes. I hit an outcropping, and went limp with shock. I felt my stomach in my mouth as I tumbled down the face, end over end, a sudden sensation of free fall, and then I impacted onto something very hard, every bone in my body suddenly singing out with pain.

I was dazed for a moment. I shook my head wearily, trying to take in my surroundings-

WHUMP!

-and then Ginger landed on top of me, knocking the air out of my already half-deflated lungs with a whoosh and a pained wheeze. Her weight rolled off my stomach, and she collapsed onto the ground next to me, laying on her side, breathing almost as hard as I was.

We lay like that for a while, side by side in the murky gloom, each jarred and rattled by the fall. My ears rang with bells, and my vision pulsed in and out of focus with my heartbeat. I must have hit my head pretty hard.

"You... tried to save me," she finally panted. "Again. Why! Why do you keep doing that?"

I extended my claws to respond, and then I recalled I couldn't answer her. I wearily sighed, before simply reaching over and offering my paw and trying to smile in the least non-threatening way I could manage.

Ginger looked like she was going to smack it away for a moment, then weakly met it with her good leg. I held it as gently as possible, as if it were made of glass.

"I'm sorry."

I gave her a questioning look, before coughing violently.

"Before - I didn't really mean it then. It's just... this is the second time in a single day that my life has been in trouble, and you stuck your own neck out for me." She sighed again. "And I've been nothing but horrible to you since, well, literally the moment you got here. And every time you just brushed it off like it was nothing. And now this."

I gave her hoof a small, reassuring squeeze.

"We're probably going to die down here."

Eeyup.

"But I think if there's anything I can say before I do, it's that my father was wrong. Diamond Dogs aren't evil, treacherous scum. Well, at least one of them isn't." She chuckled a little at this, the sound of her armor rasping over the stone floor sounding loudly over the ringing in my ears. "You know, it's stupid. I was afraid of you, when you first came here. But after all this, I think that's like saying I'm afraid of myself. Hay, I think I'm scared of my own father more than I am of you." She faded off for a few moments before mumbling, "So yeah. Sorry. And stuff. I guess."

I snorted with amusement. Even here, Ginger was still Ginger. Blunt and prideful.

Rolling over, I managed to heave myself up to all fours, plopping down on my haunches once I was steady. Now upright, I could observe our surroundings much better than from lying on my back.

The meeting-cavern we'd traversed to come here was truly pathetic in comparison to the space before me. We were on a broad shelf of rock, next to a wide, swift river. The cave ceiling looked hundreds of feet above my head, and surprisingly, it was studded with dimly glowing gems, red and pink and orange. It looked like the night sky, in a twisted sort of way. The massive cavern stretched far off into the distance on every side. Mighty stone pillars, once spire thin, were now the size of skyscrapers, stretching from floor all the way up to the starry roof. I cannot emphasize the sheer scale of the place - it was like an underground version of the Grand Canyon. One would be able to fly a jumbo jet in here, with room to spare.

I turned around, to find that we were next to a small mountain of sorts. That must have been what we slid down. High, high above, there was a black gash in the ceiling where we'd fallen through. I could just barely make out movement in it. Daring and Disarray were still there, probably trying to figure out where we went.

I put two fingers in my mouth and whistled as loudly and as shrilly as I could. Ginger winced where she lay, and my own ears snapped down against my head.

One of the tiny blobs moved around frantically for a moment. On the faintest edge of my hearing, I heard an answering whistle. Good. They knew we were all right.

The spear was lying some distance away, the rotted haft now completely shattered and crooked. It was half submerged in the edge of the river, lying precariously on the edge. I quickly went over to it, and with a brisk movement, broke the spearhead off by bringing the weapon down over my knee. Stuffing the head into the folds of my toga, I went back to Ginger and propped her up onto her stomach.

She looked around in awe and a little bit of trepidation. "Why do I get the feeling that I've heard about this place before?" she asked me. At my shrug, she frowned and tensed herself - a few small green sparks glittered into existence around her horn, and then winked away. "No magic. No sun. No clouds. Might as well be a prison."

Now I was getting the feeling that this place was familiar. Why?

I shrugged again, and gently got her to her hooves. I removed Daring's whip from her leg, and looped it around my waist for safekeeping. We went to the stream, a dark, swift body of water that for all the world resembled liquid shadow. We were both tired, battered and sore. We needed something to refresh us. I tentatively stuck a paw in - it was cold and wet, just like water should be. With that, I dunked my entire head into the drink, Ginger doing the same, and took an enormous gulp.

Immediately, my body was filled with pins and needles of sharp, spiking pain. It started in my throat, then spread to every extremity. I thrashed and clawed at myself in agony as I rolled to and fro on the shore. I was dimply aware of a broken, cracked, dreadful howling, accompanied by what must have been Ginger screaming bloody murder.

I'm not sure how long it lasted, but suddenly, something was being forced into my mouth, something cool and sweet, causing the torture to end instantaneously. It was water! Real, precious water! My eyes flickered open to find Daring Do looking at me from where I was lying, concern in her wide, magenta eyes.

She turned to the side. "He's awake!"

I felt groggy and weak, as though I'd just recovered from a sickness. I once again pried myself off the floor and swayed into a sitting position.

Ginger was lying nearby, looking as exhausted as I was. "That stuff had a bit more kick than I'm used to," she finally slurred.

Did Ginger just crack a joke? Damn, she must be really out of it!

"You're both lucky to be alive."

I turned to see Disarray standing off to the side, facing the river with his paws and claws on his hips, a stony look on his face. "Only one river in Equestria will do that to a pony - or a Diamond Dog, for that matter - and that just makes things a whole lot more fun for us, doesn't it?"

He thoughtfully spat, a flaming glob of dragon-saliva, and spun around on one foot, spreading his arms wide, as if delivering a speech to a crowd of thousands. A manically cheerful grin lit up his face.

"Ladies and germs, I give you - The River Styx!"

Ginger's pupils immediately shrunk. "Oh, no. No-no-no-no! We're in Tartarus!" Her breathing became sharp and panicked. "Oh, Celestia, I knew there was something wrong about this place!" She tried to get up, but immediately collapsed onto her face, scrabbling awkwardly on the ground like a worm with it's head cut off. "We need to get out of here! We're all gonna die! We're all gonna die! We need to - OOF!"

Ginger stopped and blinked, rubbing the side of her face with her good foreleg. Daring stood over her, blowing on a hoof as if it were the smoking muzzle of a gun.

"I needed that." Ginger stated blankly, now extremely calm.

Daring shrugged. "It worked on Fluffy, too."

I absently rubbed my jaw, remembering when I'd first woken up in the treehouse and had a panic attack. Oh, it had definitely worked, all right. Maybe knocked a tooth loose, as well, and - hey! Dammit, she called me Fluffy again!

"Ginger's right, though. Tartarus is no place for us to be. There's all kinds of monsters down here. The worst kind, I might add."

"Let me guess - you've been here before on one of your heroic adventures?" Disarray asked, somewhat sarcastically.

"Actually, no. This is the first time I've been here, and I'd like to make it my last." The explorer came over to me and removed her whip from around my waist, giving it an experimental swish before looping it around her own. "Whatever's down here is here for good reason. There's monsters in Tartarus that will make your hydras up above look like playful kittens." She paused, before adding, "Kittens without any teeth or claws."

On Earth, Tartarus had been the pit that into which the Greek god Zeus had thrown his titan father, Kronos, after overthrowing him and chopping him into little tiny pieces. It served as a prison from him, and much worse. I guess the same applies to the Equestrian version, minus the corpse of a titan overlord who ended up in the slice-and-dicer.

Hopefully.

"Pity, I was wondering if I could stop by and chat with some of them. I'm sure they've come up with some excellent jokes while they've been down here. But you're right. We should go. We're being affected by their dark presence as it is. Too long and we might start tearing each other's hearts out."

Wait... if the corruption from Tartarus would do that to us... then that meant... I glanced up at the ceiling again, eyeing the crack with renewed interest.

An idea came to be, as sudden as a bolt of lightning.

Frost Snap and Mosspaw must have unintentionally dug too deep and been exposed to Tartarus. Of course, brief exposure wouldn't do much, but they'd been meeting in that tunnel for years! They'd been corrupted... and then, thanks to Tartarus' proximity to the den, it spread to the rest of the Greenclaws. There must have been infighting. And when Frost came for his wife, and been finally pushed over the edge by her death, he'd simply wiped out the few that remained. And the hydras! By the gods, they might have been affected by the breach as as well! As the corruption steadily leaks out of here, it could spread even further than the nest. It could even overtake Wethoof, if left unchecked.

There were still pieces to fit together. Some parts of this puzzle made no sense. Why had Frost's wife been kidnapped? Why had the Greenclaws exhausted their supply of gems? Why didn't they know any better? I had a rough idea. It made the most sense so far, at least.

I heard someone call my name a few times. I snapped out of my train of thought to hear, "Echo, you all right there? You looked a little distant for a moment." Daring was speaking to me.

I nodded in reply. Once we were far enough away, I could tell them everything. But we had to get back to the surface, or end up like Frost and Mosspaw. I pointed upwards and looked at her questioningly. How were we going to do that, anyway?

Sharp as ever, she quickly responded. "We set up some ropes on the way down, as fast as we could. It's a good thing, too, because if we hadn't hurried, you might have... you know. Died."

I winced at this, and finally raised myself back up. Sure enough, there was a single rope trailing down the mountainside, tied to the protrusion of rock I'd hit before. Another one was tied off even further, and a final rope was dangling from the crack in the ceiling.

Approaching Ginger, I lowered myself back down to all fours and dipped a shoulder. She took the message and hopped on my back, once again wrapping a leg around my neck, albeit a little weakly. I frowned. She wouldn't be able to hold on with her strength. I took the edge of my toga and cut off a thick strip, twisting it around until I had a small rope of my own, and tossed it over her, before tying it off on my stomach. I stood up on two legs. Ginger yelped in surprise - but stayed put.

"Well aren't you just the most ingenious little bugger!" Disarray commented from where he was now standing at the base of the slope. Daring was somewhat-cradled in his lobster claw arms, which were clasped behind his back, creating a platform for her to brace herself against. His free pair of limbs, the muscular white bear arms, were gripping the rope easily.

I gave him the finger, and waved my paw at him, telling him to step on it. He laughed and easily began to scramble up the surface.

"Wait until we reach the next rope before going up!" Daring called down from her perch. "It won't hold us both!"

" 'Cause you're fat!" Disarray added, and shouted in pain as he received yet another bonk on the head. "OW! Hey! What's with you and hitting? Come on, everypony's a critic..."

As they receded into the distance, something flickered on the edge of my vision. I craned my head. For an absolute instant, I saw something duck around a nearby corner.

"Did you see that?" Ginger whispered.

I nodded, my hackles rising unbidden. Time to go!

Completely ignoring the rope, I leaped up onto the mountainside, which was roughly at a seventy degree slope. My claws sank into the stone, and I paused for a moment, attached to the stone like a barnacle on the face of a great whale. Again, something passed the corner of my eye. I growled hoarsely and began to scale the stone.

Spiderman can suck my big, doggy di-

"Easy there! You're going to make me slip out of this thing!" grumbled Ginger as I hauled myself ever upwards.

I reluctantly obliged. We were making good time, regardless. In fact, we caught up to Disarray at the top of the first rope. "Show-off," he grumbled as we passed him. Daring was busy hauling in the rope to store in her saddlebags, and merely waved with a free wing, her mouth and hooves currently occupied.

Paw over paw, I ascended the slope. I fell into a rythym of motion. Right paw, right leg, left paw, left leg. Climbing lessons from long ago days spent at a YMCA trickled back from whatever corners of my brain they'd been hiding in. Don't climb with your arms - climb with your legs. Don't overuse your grip strength, or you'll tire quickly. Right paw, right leg, left paw, left leg. Keep aware of your surroundings. Feel out a hand-hold before you use it. Test everything at least once. Right paw, right leg, left paw, left leg. Take your time. Trust your legs. Think before you climb. Right paw, right leg, left paw, left leg.

Lather, rinse, and repeat.

We arrived at the summit, a jagged, pointy crest of gravel and cracked stone. The water from the tunnel splattered onto a small pool that had formed at the very tip. Dangling not two feet away was the rope. I stood under the water for a moment, drinking my fill and then bending forward so Ginger could drink hers. I still felt rather queer from drinking from the Styx, and this cleansing downpour helped immensely.

I took hold of the rope and set off, not even bothering to use my legs for support. Climbing something that's completely free-hanging is quite different than a solid My arms, backed by solid muscle and an iron resolve, were strong enough to haul myself up to the great crack. We dangled there for a moment, admiring the view. For all the wrongness this place emitted, it looked pretty far-out.

"Let's get out of here," Ginger finally said.

I couldn't agree more.

With a grunt, I heaved myself up the last few feet and into the tunnel, on the far side of the gap that'd originally caused us so much trouble. There were no boards left covering the hole, only broken stumps of decay and fungus. I untied Ginger from me and set her down on the floor, wearily slumping down next to the opposing wall.

After a few minutes, Disarray popped out of the hole, Daring in tow. I rose from my position to greet them. The explorer hopped off her ride, bearing a toothy grin. "Come on, then!" she chirped. "We're close to the end now - I can feel it!"

"A warm bed and some hot cider sounds just perfect right about now," murmured Ginger from the floor.

Daring was about to set off down the tunnel when I stopped her, firmly setting a paw over her withers and locking her into place. "What's the matter now?" she groaned.

I pointed to the hole in the floor, and the drew a finger across my neck. I mimed laying something over it, pounding my fist into my palm to emphasize my point. That hole needed to be sealed up, and pronto.

She thought for a moment, brushing a wayward strand of mane out of her eyes. Then, her face lit up like the night sky on the Fourth of July. "I think I might have something for just that..." She craned her neck around and removed a long, red tube from her saddlebags. A small, black piece of string sprouted from the tip. My eyes widened in recognition.

Dynamite!?

"What? A mare's got to be ready for the worst!" Daring joked at my expression, before taking out a box of matches. I quickly picked up Ginger and got ready to run like the wind.

Holding the stick of TNT in her wingtips, Daring Do struck the match and lit it. She then tossed it into the air, pivoted gracefully, and bucked the thing away. The lit explosive sailed forward, before bouncing off a jutting crest of rock... and landing not two feet away from where it originally began.

"That was the worst throw ever. Of all time," Disarray deadpanned.

Daring quickly slapped the stick away to the hole, and took off down the tunnel. "RUN!"

KRUMP!

We were in hot pursuit, and not five seconds later, a massive thunderstrike shook the tunnel. I glanced back to see it cave in over the hole, burying the gateway to Tartarus under a hundred tons of earth. That brought a genuine smile to my face. Scratch one up for me.

The rest of the trip was a blur. Tired and sore and still wonky from the Styx, not to mention the hydra chase, the tunnel melded together into a seamless stretch of time. After what must have been twenty minutes or twenty hours, the tunnel sharply sloped upwards, and began to corkscrew towards the surface. Finally!

Ginger had fallen asleep. Despite everything, I was somewhat glad to have earned her trust. I needed her help, after all, despite how she tended to act. The prickly mare was obnoxiously proud at times, but she had good reason to be. She was quite a powerful unicorn, I could tell. Hopefully that pride had been mellowed out a little from today. Oh, well. At least she doesn't hate me anymore. That's always a plus - people not hating you.

The tunnel suddenly came to an end. We were in a very small, shallow, bowl shaped space, and above looked to be solid stone, with a hole bored through it, capped with what seemed to be a lid made out of similar material, probably to disguise the entrance.

Disarray stretched and yawned. "Well, then. It's been fun, everypony, but I think I'll be going now. I have some excellent clop-fiction to catch up on!" With a wink and a clack of a lobster claw, he was gone.

"I'll get the lid," I told Daring. It felt good to be able to speak again. We'd passed out of Tartarus' magic-sapping influence long ago. Once again placing Ginger on the ground, I rose up to two legs, easily entering the hole and met it with my paws. I pushed, and with a soft grinding rumble, it lifted. Cool, fresh air flooded the tunnel. I took a deep breath. Such sweetness, such simple pleasure.

Sliding the lid to the side revealed gentle darkness. It must be night out. I reached back down into the cave and lifted Ginger up and over the edge, where she unceremoniously rolled onto her side. I gripped with two paws and hauled myself out. Daring shot up through the gap with a single pump of the wing, landing gracefully next to me. Once the stone lid had been lifted back into place, I turned to assess my surroundings.

It was very dark, and as I turned, my rear paw knocked up against something that wobbled around, before crashing to the ground with a earsplitting clatter. There was a flurry of motion to my left, and something large and feathery slammed into my side. I abruptly found myself flying through the air, passing through something like canvas, and landing again on grass and packed earth. The stars were now shining above me. There was a large number of tents surrounding me, several with lit campfires and ponies sitting at them, who were now staring at me with utter confusion.

I looked back to find that I'd been thrown through the side of one of such tents. I must have come up underneath it.

The thing that had hit me tore out from the tent, pouncing on me with frightening agility. It was a gryphon, surprisingly; the first one I'd ever seen. It was holding a monstrous sword with its eagle talons, the lion's paws planted firmly on top of me as it glared down with suspicion. The sword was pointed straight at my throat.

"You've got exactly ten seconds to tell me what the flying feather you were doing in my tent, friend, or I'll make sure it'll be your last." It growled. I stared back, helplessly. It was standing on my paws. I could do nothing but lie there.

"Whoa! Calm down, there!" Daring came out of the tent now, followed by a sleepy and hobbling Ginger.

The gryphon pointed the massive weapon at her now. "Oy! You as well! I'm just trying to get some shuteye, and you three barge in and start breaking stuff! Start talking. Now."

"Oh, we're at fault? You're the one waving a bucking sword around like it's a toy! You attack Echo, threaten him, then threaten somepony else?" Ginger was fully awake now, and she was pissed. "You point that thing at any of us one more time, and I swear to Celestia, I will cut your wings off, pluck your feathers, spit-roast you with the thing and then feed you to your own family!"

The gryphon was momentarily dumbstruck, as was everypony watching the spectacle.

Note to self: DON'T EVER GET HER ANGRY! EVER.

It took a full ten seconds before somepony said anything. "Uh, Grif, I think you're standing on top of that Diamond Dog that the captain was talking about," one of the bystanders said.

"Indeed you are." Captain Tythus' voice broke through the silence like an icebreaker through the arctic sea. He strode to us from a group of ponies he must have been conversing with. "If you'd kindly remove yourself from your position of power, mercenary, I'm sure we can get to the bottom of this."

The gryphon scowled, but stepped off me, cocking his weapon over one shoulder and taking a few paces back. I stood up, and enjoyed the look of suprise in his eyes as I towered a good two feet over his feathered head. I gazed around, taking in the scene.

I was in Wethoof, in the space between the wall and the town. Tents stretched in every direction, dotted here and there with scattered campfires, twinkling like stars. Ponies of all kinds, some armored, some not, strode here and there with military swagger. And above the town, anchored securely to the belltower on the barracks, was an enormous, silver airship, with six engine pods and an oversize undercarriage, which was studded with what looked to be cannon holes, and a golden sun emblazoned on its dorsal fins. The thing must have spanned the length of several football fields. It floated serenely above the earth, like a majestic whale swimming in the sky.

Looks like the reinforcements are here. And they brought some toys with them!

The captain turned to Ginger, who still looked somewhat ticked. "Ginger. Could you give me an explanation for what I'm seeing here? How did you manage to re-enter Wethoof without passing through the gates? I've had sentries on it all night, and patrols scouring the flats, looking for you."

And so, with the reinforcements gathered around, and a ruffled-looking gryphon mercenary standing skeptically to the side, Ginger told them what had happened after the gates had been closed behind us. She started with how we'd intercepted and lured away Big Momma, (conveniently leaving out how I'd saved her ass) how we ended up at the old Greenclaw den, and the use of the now-sealed off passage (again conveniently leaving out how I'd saved her ass again), the discovery of the breach in Tartarus, and our subsequent surfacing from underneath the gryphon's tent.

Tythus listened intently, adding in a few intelligent questions here or there, before finally nodding, satisfied with our report. He graciously thanked Daring Do for her assistance in closing the rift, and told her that she would always be welcome in the barracks.

"Now, then. With all that cleared up, I assume we can call this an honest accident?" Tythus addressed the gryphon, who simply shrugged at this, while intently looking at me with an unreadable expression. "Good." He turned to us. "Ginger, you are to go to the medical tent to get that leg fixed up, at once. There are some excellent medics there - you should be as right as rain with half a night's work. Once they've discharged you, report to the barracks with all due haste." He paused and turned to me. "And Echo, you are to get a good night's rest. You've earned it, without question. Take the rest of the day tomorrow to recuperate and organize your equipment."

He made and about-face, shifting his head back the slightest degree to give us an almost mischievous wink.

"We attack at sunset. Good night, everypony."

Authour: Tartarus! I know, right? WOW! Even I didn't see that one coming, and I write this stupid thing!

Anyway! I have an important announcement! I have applied to become a volunteer firefighter at the local station. That being said, I will have to go through some basic training, and afterwards will be spending some periods on call. This means that updates to the Ballad will not be as frequent. Week-long gaps or longer are possible. I am sorry for this, but I do have a life outside of fanfiction, and I do like to enjoy it.

To make up for this, have some fan art, by the amazingly supercalafragalisticexpealadocious Andthoro, from right here on FIMfiction! Give this guy some love, because Echo is best comic book D-Dog.

Oh, and apparently, some whimsical fan made a voice recording of the first few chapters! Shoutout to EchoTheMasterOfTime from youtube.com! Dude, you made my day when I found this! You made it twice.

(17) The Big Stick

The River Styx glimmered in the light of the gems, a velvet stream of shadow and blackness. It beckoned me forward, filling me with the burning desire of a sultry-eyed bed mate, and the desperate need of a weeping child. I was helpless to resist, staggering step by step to the rocky shelf. A familiar figure walked alongside on four legs, as if never injured.

Ginger's form flickered for an instant, becoming as white as snow, her eyes the color of glacier ice. Then she was back, in all her fiery glory. I felt myself inexplicably shift as well. Long, shaggy fur shortened into a thick, but dense coat of black and mottled brown. My paws adopted a greenish, oily tinge. I felt something around my neck, a collar, studded with gems.

The feeling was gone almost as soon as it came.

As one, we approached the dread river, solemnly pausing at the edge before dipping our heads down to almost within an inch of the frothing shadows.

"We risk much by this," I felt myself say, an undamaged throat rumbling thickly with coarse words.

"But we can gain so much more." Ginger flickered ghostly white once again when she said this, also in a different voice - one with pride, nobility, and conviction. "You heard what she said. We can usher in a golden age of peace, brother! This is a small price to pay for that."

"Different value for things, we have," I reminded her.

"But peace is still up there. We can do this. I know we can. Just look at what we've accomplished alone! An alpha, tried and tested, and a mage, a wielder of the elements themselves. Let's see what we can do as brothers."

"The burden - too great, it might be."

Ginger shook her head. "For what we've been shown? Nothing is too great for that. For the greater good of all."

I closed my eyes. The scent of corruption and the Styx flooded all my senses. I could even see it, if I focused hard enough. But the promise of what she offered us was too great to ignore. This would be the easy part, anyway. We'd done much to come here. After Old Yellowfang had been bested, things had really picked up. We'd moved fast, and swooped into the power vacuum like a pair of vultures. Now there was only one last thing to do, and it would all work out...

I spoke the words she had taught me. Ginger and I alternated verses, as was required. The words cut through the silence the accursed prison like a molten blade of iron.

The visage of our tutor, our guide, who promised us so much, who had guided us to power, appeared in the reflection of the water, standing tall between Ginger and I, as dark and ethereal as the River Styx. She smiled, revealing sharp, serrated teeth. The next verse, the final one, was spoken with three voices, although only two bodies stood by the edge.

As one, we dipped our heads and drank deeply.

Then the pain started all over again.

My eyes flew open in a panic, taking in the sunlit room in an instant. Something was stabbing into my side, hot, sharp and blinding. I quickly rolled to the right - straight into the wall.

WHUMP!

Ow. Good thing I stopped myself with my face. This thing has been intercepting dodgeballs, slaps of angry women, and the wrath of Grandma's kissy-face for years. Glad to see it hasn't lost its touch...

But what was causing me so much pain? I rolled over, to find the spearhead. It must have fallen out of my toga when I wrapped it around myself like a blanket. I absently picked it up between two fingers. I hadn't had much time to examine it before, and the darkness and frenzied atmosphere of the caves didn't help, either.

The head was shaped like a very long, narrow leaf - thick and wide near the bottom, leading to a thin and elegant spire that looked sharp enough to split atoms. It was made of a pale material, and looked to be some strange fusion of metal and crystal. A new element, found only in Equestria, perhaps? Delicate, swirling designs running along a double blood channel along the blade's spine gave it an aesthetically appealing appearance. But for all it was, it was still just a spear head.

I distastefully flicked the thing to the side, and it embedded itself into the floor. Funny, how the nature of killing things hasn't really differed, even in Equestria. When you think about it, it all comes down to poking holes in something until it dies. Be it from claws, or teeth, or arrows, or spears...or bullets...

I shook myself out of my thoughts, for the first time taking in my room. I was lying half-on, half-off my cot. The few thin blankets I had were shredded to pieces, the mattress had been savaged, and the single pillow I'd been allotted was nothing more than a scattering of feathers. I breathed deeply, trying to regain my cool. Sitting up and placing my head between my paws, I slowly rocked back and forth on the ruins of my bedding. The dream came back to me in waves, in surges of memory. What had I just witnessed?

A loud knocking on the door shattered the stillness of the morning. "Echo!" barked a gruff, familiar voice. "Are you all right in there? I heard some strange noises."

I whistled twice in reply, my usual response to indicate that all was well. Brushing away some of the debris, I tried to put on an air of calmness, although I was still shaking inside from having to drink from the Styx again. Even if it was just a dream.

The door opened, revealing Captain Tythus' golden form. He surveyed the room in stoic silence. Then he spoke, "What in Equestria happened here?"

"A nightmare?" I offered him, sheepishly trying to swipe drifting feathers out of the air. "I'm not entirely sure."

Tythus just sighed, appraising my destroyed sleeping comforts with a dark look. He wasn't wearing his battered silver armor today. Instead, a single blue sash was wrapped around one shoulder and across his chest, decorated with a plethora of medals and ribbons. His steely, experienced eyes flicked to the spearhead sticking out of the floor.

"Is that what I think it is?" he asked.

Oh, crackerjacks! That stupid law the mayor passed! I wasn't supposed to have any weapons... A spearhead counts as a weapon. You can still stab people with it. It's more or less the equivalent of an Equestrian prison shank.

The captain's golden telekinetic aura surrounded the weapon piece, then flickered out. He frowned, and simply bent down to tear it out of the ground with his mouth. He spat it out to his hoof, and moved it close to his face, curiously observing it with the practiced gaze of a veteran. His face never changed from that neutral, stony expression worn by the Royal Guard. Finally, he lowered the spearhead.

"See me in my office after breakfast. You're on meal duty, by the way. I suggest you step on it - we've got a lot more mouths to feed, in case you haven't noticed." With that, he turned on the spot and swiftly trotted away, tucking the item into his sash.

I let out the lungful of air I realized I'd been holding.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck....

When Ginger awoke, it took her a moment to realize that she was in the infirmary. She struggled to sit up, finding that her forelimb was immobilized. It was stuck in one of those tubes she'd seen the newcoming medics unpacking the night before, attached to the small railing on the side of her bed. The tube was filled with some kind of magic restorative liquid, apparently. With a sigh, the mare flopped back down. She savored the sensation of the soft mattress. The infirmary always had the best places to sleep.

She'd had a dream, but it was fading away already. Something about Tartarus? Yes. And the Styx. And that awful burning in her gut when she'd drank it. Not something I'd ever like to do again, she shuddered at the thought.

The sunlight from the windows warmed her eyelids. Stupid sun. Why couldn't it come up five minutes later, for once? She rolled over, and was abruptly seared in the face by something hot and bright. Ginger hissed and raised her free hoof to cover her eyes, wincing away from the glare. Once she was sure whatever it was had stopped shining, she peeked her eyes open a crack. They slammed wide open in shock, her heart suddenly thumping into her rib cage, almost painfully. Now this was something she'd never thought to see again...

Resting on the bedside table were her mother's goggles.

The sun was reflecting off the black lenses. That must have been what flashed her so brightly. Frowning, Ginger dug within the recesses of her mind, prying open the familiar mental barrier sealing off her power. The goggles were surrounded by her soft green aura, and gently levitated over to hang in space in front of her. It'd been a long time since she'd seen these. She bit back a wave of sadness and nostalgia. But even then, she couldn't resist a small smile.

They were welding goggles, of all things. Her mother had been an artist. Not just any artist, but one who made beautiful sculptures of metal and gems. Her creations had been fantastical pieces - some had even found there way into the palaces of a few of the Royal Family. The material she'd worked with had required that she had to use powerful fires to melt the stuff down until she could shape it, coyly teasing it into the most wondrous of shapes. The goggles let her see the metals better, often no more than shining globs of molten slag. She was some kind of mare, all right.

Ginger remembered wanting to be like her, once. Shaping beauty from the ugliest pieces of the earth. That was before her own magic had come in, before she'd taken after her father's line; the Snaps. The very forces of nature bent to their will. Both parents had been particularly skilled in magic, indeed. But with her mother's line came prestige, as well as the gift of unicorn magic. Her relatives even had some distant claim to the Royal House, apparently.

But where had they come from? Ginger examined the eyewear from every angle. Last they'd seen them, they'd been gathering dust in her mother's abandoned studio at home...

A sudden rumbling breath to her left told her the answer. Her father lay sprawled on a nearby sofa. He looked exhausted, and judging by the red in his eyes as he slowly opened them, probably still wasn't sleeping at night. The nightmares must be coming back.

Her father immediately sprang to his hooves once he realized she was awake. Ginger's breath hitched in her throat as he approached the bedside.

Frost looked at her leg for a few seconds, then right into her eyes. Ginger swallowed.

"I knew this would happen," he stated.

Ginger said nothing.

"I told you this would happen. You ignored me. And now look! Trapped in a hospital like some elderly cripple!" he spat.

"I got hurt. This happens to everypony," Ginger weakly stated.

"Not to you." He fired back, rounding on her. "You can't get hurt. Too important. Yes. That's it." Frost was pacing now. "I'll file a petition to that weak excuse for a captain. You're too valuable to serve. You need to be safe, with the real citizens. The ones who'll stay by us; who won't run off to the first overblown fop from Canterlot who says he's here to help."

"No!" Ginger protested instinctively, without thinking. How could he do this to her? She was helping the town! They needed her for the plan to work!

He stopped his pacing, staring directly ahead. "What. Did. You. Say?"

"N-no..." her courage was being smothered.

"Come again?"

"..."

"That's what I thought you said. I know what's good for you, Ginger. The town guard is no place for you. You could be seriously hurt! Or worse! I can't stay by you all day. I have too much work ahead of me."

"...You don't have to do that. I'm fine on my own..."

"Obviously, considering that blasted idot sends you on one mission, and you come back with a hobble worse than a paraplegic." That shut her up again. "When the town takes residence in the airship tonight, I want you in there with them. It's going to be far too dangerous for you." Frost paused, as if thinking deeply about something. "As your parent, I have a right to ensure your safety. I want you away from those traitors in the guard, and away from the dammed hydras."

Something flickered in Ginger, that rebellious spirit she'd always carried. Before she could stop herself, it ignited into a small flame. "And him?" she asked.

Frost winced, as if physically struck. His anger rebounded with a surge. "Don't you dare even mention that thing's presence around me! It's an affront to everything I've worked for, everything I've done for you and this town!"

"Why?" Ginger responded quietly. The fire would not go out without a fight, it seemed.

"Why? WHY? Look at what you've got in front of you. That's why. Look at where you are, and why your leg needs to be in that contraption in the first place!"

"It's here because I saved the lives of some twenty ponies who were outside of the wall when a hydra was sighted." Ginger struggled upwards. The fire grew. "A hydra that was sighted by me, and if it hadn't, we'd have twenty more bodies for the graveyard. And if it wasn't for him, there would have been twenty-one bodies, as well."

Frost's eyes blazed. He opened his mouth, but Ginger cut him off. She raised herself even higher. The metal container binding her leg to the bed creaked in protest. The scent of smoke tinged the air. "Actually, in a way, there would be twenty-two bodies, because he saved my life twice in the same day. We followed your tunnel, father! The one you and Mosspaw dug?"

"HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT NAME IN FRONT OF ME!" he shouted furiously.

"HOW DARE YOU NOT TELL ANYONE THAT YOU BROKE INTO TARTARUS, FOR LUNA'S SAKE!" she roared right back. Her leg was now awkwardly twisted, the liquid inside the container was actually boiling, and as she raised herself up yet again, the attachments to the bedpost began to warp. "HOW DARE YOU NOT TELL ME, YOUR OWN DAUGHTER?" She exhaled sharply, emitting a small cloud of steam from her nostrils. "I went through hell for this town. Literally! And so did he! So did you! And so did Mosspaw!"

"That was d-different!" her father managed to choke out. "We had another pur-"

"-NO! IT! WAS! NOT!" Ginger screeched, magic amplifying her voice to painful levels. The mattress underneath her abruptly caught fire. The mare winced and grunted, finally tearing free of the bedpost. She twisted off the bed and broke the container with a burst of magic, extinguishing the blaze in an instant. She shakily stood up and rounded on her father, finally reigning in her temper.

"Why did you come here," she said flatly.

Frost levitated the goggles over to her from the smoking mattress. "To remind you." His voice had become cold and emotionless again, as usual. "To remind you of what we lost. I...can't go through that again."

"What you lost?" Ginger spat. "I'm beginning to think I lost two parents in those caves."

Her father bowed his head, eyes closed. "And I think I've lost a daughter as well as a wife."

Ginger recoiled. What right did he have to say that? She'd looked after him for eight years. In the beginning, he'd been to depressed to even use the bathroom correctly. She'd raised him back from the brink. More or less, she'd been the mayor of Wethoof while while her father fought his demons. He'd conquered them. Or so she thought.

"Whatever you're after, what you're planning. I want no part of it. Keep me out of your dammed scheming."

Without another word, Ginger slipped her mother's goggles around her neck and stormed past him, only limping a little. He didn't move an inch. For a split second, his form flickered, filling out and straightening up. Then it was gone. She gave one backwards glance, then burst through the infirmary door into the main hall of the barracks.

Buck the consequences. She had a town to save. And once the danger was passed, she was leaving.

This time, for good.

"Comin' in high!" Coconut called.

I stretched my arm up as I leaned back over the counter, catching the flapjack neatly on the tray. I grunted in satisfaction, setting the tray down on the second cart of the morning. As I set to work on filling a bin with sliced fruit, I had a few seconds to spare, and glanced around the madhouse surrounding us.

To put it bluntly, the kitchen was getting more action than a prostitute in New Orleans during Mardi Gras. And business was booming, baby!

...In the sense of activity, I mean. Not from getting plowed by a bunch of drunk guys.

The reinforcements had some cooks of their own - big, swarthy ponies like Coconut, who cursed and joked and laughed uproariously. One of them was the burliest mare I'd ever seen. They were holding their own against our two man tag-team, but just barely.

See, when I'd first come into the kitchen, they'd been astonished that a diamond dog would have any interest in the culinary arts. When Coconut had tried to vouch for me, they hadn't bought it. And so, a good natured competition had erupted. "Forcies," as the new guy were being called, versus the "Hayseeds." Whoever made the most grub before the breakfast bell rang won.

The prize hadn't exactly been worked out. But still. We were pumping out food like nobody's business. World hunger a problem? Bitch please! Screw the Ghostbusters, give us a call!

I tossed the entire cutting board full of fruit into the air, and did a quick double swipe with my claws. The fruit fell back down to the board, perfectly sliced, oozing juices. I slammed the counter, and it all gracefully arced through the air to fall into a nearby bin. I swatted the thing off the counter with a neat backhand. It landed directly on the edge of the cart, taking up the least amount of space possible, as the rest of it was already covered in other mounds of food.

"Cart number two, forcies! What'chu gonna do?" Coconut sang, as he cackled and flipped the shit out of some more pancakes. The fact that he was doing this all without the use of thumbs made it even more impressive. The brown stallion was a whirlwind of activity, completely in his element in the chaos of a full kitchen.

However, the other cooks were blistering along as well, cooking-related cutie marks (sorry, I mean emblems) of their own on their flanks. It was going to be close.

"We'll fill another one up! Number two's good to go! Hup!" the mare called, sliding a rival platter of sliced fruit onto their own tray. It even had one of those little umbrellas on it! These guys meant business.

"Hup-hup!"

"Hup-hoooooo!" The other two answered.

"Echo, get on those buckin' rolls! Move that furry flank!" Coconut barked. This guy was almost as bad as Tythus in the kitchen, I swear.

I skidded over to the oven and popped it open. Every single rack was loaded with a tray of fresh cinnamon rolls. I extended my claws and gingerly gripped two at a time - the oven mitts the ponies used simply wouldn't fit me, so I had to be careful. Sliding all the trays onto the now-cleared counter, I hastily whirled around.

Where was it? Ah!

The frosting was balanced on the end of Coconut's tail, held out for me. "Forgettin' somethin'?" he said, not even bothering to take his eyes off the flapjacks, which he was still furiously flipping at a demon's pace. I snagged the container and spun back around.

The forcies' third cart was filling up fast. We were falling behind! Thinking quickly, I lumped all the rolls together on one big tray. Looming over the innocent food, I raised the container of frosting up high, smiling evilly.

Time...to get...sticky!

One of the other chefs glanced around, spotting me with the upraised frosting. His eyes widened.

"Everypony get down! She's gonna blow!" He ducked down. The others whirled about, saw me, and did the exact same thing.

Coconut's voice broke through the din of the kitchen. "Echo, wait-!"

I slammed my paws together as hard as I could, crushing the container flatter than a coin in between my furry mitts.

KA-BLOOSH!

It exploded.

"So, please elaborate to me how the entire kitchen ended up covered in..." Tythus, the only clean one present, paused and wiped a hoof on Coconut's nose, before licking off a bit of the substance that covered it and frowning for a moment. "...In frosting?"

Four hooves, equally coated in the same sweet, sticky goop, pointed at me.

I, meanwhile, was busy giving myself a bath.

With my tongue.

Because I was fucking delicious.

I looked up from trying to lick the underside of my arm. "I can explain, I swear."

Tythus cocked an eyebrow.

"Nevermind, maybe I can't explain."

Five hooves met five faces. All five faces were then promptly covered in five coats of frosting. Tythus, who had formerly been clean, stared at his hoof in shock. He'd clearly done that on reflex. Uh-oh...

"Bwa-hahahahahahahahaaa!" he roared with laughter. We nervously joined in, until we were actually rolling on the ground in hysterics.

After the fit had passed, Tythus wiped off the frosting off, giving the kitchen a ruined glance. "Well. At least you got the food out to everypony. Feeding an army is no small task." He sighed and shook his head. "Get yourselves cleaned up. I'll have some of the other forcies come by and mop up the mess. Echo, see me in my office when you're done."

We gratefully headed off to the communal showers.

You'd think one would get weirded out by showering with a bunch of talkative guys and one burly chick at the same time. Surprisingly, I felt no shame. There was really no reason to have separate shower rooms anyway - we were pretty much always naked as it was. "Letting it all hang out" is how the phrase goes, or so I believe.

I turned the water on as hot as it would go. I alternately switched from washing the frosting out with the scorching jet to my tongue. That frosting was just too damn good to waste.

"So, mate. Whaddaya think cap wants with ya?" Coconut asked me, from the nozzle next to me.

"Don't know." I paused to rub my face, clearing out some water that had fallen in my eyes. "You know how we came back to town through the caves, right?"

"Yeah."

"When we were down there, I found a spear. Brought it back with me, but the haft broke. He found the head this morning in my room."

"Really? I'm sure it won't be anythin' bad, then. If you're worrying about that law that Frosty put out a while back, don't. You noticed that gryphon swaggerin' around the forcie camp?"

"The one with the sword that's bigger than you? We broke some of his stuff last night by accident."

He nodded, lathering some soap through his mohawk. "That's him. See, from what I've been hearin', he's the head a of a mercenary group - a group that Frosty hired himself. If he tries to take your weapon away, he has to disarm his own mercs."

"Why would the mayor hire mercenaries when we were supposed to get an entire army at our backs?"

Coconut shrugged. "Dunno, mate. Maybe he thought the forcies wouldn't be enough? Glad they're on our side, though."

I had to agree with that. A few more minutes passed. By this time, I was clean enough, but I was enjoying the water too much to get out. A question suddenly popped into my head.

"So, what's with that big airship floating above the barracks?" The massive vehicle was impossible to miss. Even from inside the barracks, you could tell it was there. It cast a shadow large enough to cover the entire building, and then some.

Coconut looked at me quizzically for am moment. "How do ya not know about the airships, mate?"

It was my turn to shrug. "Not from around here, remember?"

One of the other chefs in the shower, the burly mare, answered my question. "We use them for transport and weapons when the terrain is too rough or the distance too great for a pegasi caravan. Usually, the fliers will pull us around Equestria to wherever we're needed, but we use carriers like the Benevolent Mercy to go to far off places like Wethoof. It's a long way from here to Canterlot, dog."

I digested that information for a while. It made a lot of sense to have an Equestrian version of an aircraft carrier. They could go far away and bring a lot of troops. And these floated! How cool is that! I was incredibly intrigued by the technological implications of this. What fuel did they use? How did they float? What were they built like? Something she said stuck out, though.

"You said something about weapons?"

She grinned. "You got it. She's packing heavy cannon, the good stuff. She'll be part of tonight's battle, actually. The Benevolent is gonna be up with your hayseed catapults, raining all sorts of pain down on the hydras."

Seriously? They called it the Benevolent Mercy, and outfitted the thing with guns? I smell the black humor of Princess Celestia afoot.

Coconut spoke up. "Hold up - I thought the townfolk were gonna be up there? If the hydras break through, they'll be trapped inside the walls."

"Nope. We've got two more support airships coming in for that. Every carrier has at least a few following them around. They should be here any minute, actually. We'll be keeping the big guns where they're needed, though. The front lines could use them."

While Coconut continued discussing tactics with the mare, I made my departure, politely saying goodbye to the rest of the chefs, who sent me off cheerily enough.

In what seemed like no time at all, I found myself standing outside Tythus' door, freshly cleaned and wearing my toga, along with my armor, which I figured I'd have to keep wearing to get used to it. The plating still bothered me, though. Its weight was uncomfortable and it only served to remind me that I wore it because I was risking terrible injury.

All in a day's work, right?

Christ, I hate my job...

I knocked on the door as softly as I could. Maybe if I pretended he wasn't home, I could just leave! The Fed-Ex guys did it all the time. Stealthy bastards.

"I can hear you out there. Come in."

Ay, carumba. Forgot that ponies have better hearing than humans.

I opened the door and stepped inside, lowering my hood as a sign of respect. The office hadn't changed very much since the last time I'd been there. The desk, cot, and mannequin were in the same places as last time, although the mannequin was currently wearing Tythus' beat up regalia.

The captain himself was sitting behind his desk at his chair. The bottoms of all furniture pieces made for sitting were larger than those you would find on Earth. It allowed the ponies a place to sit as they would on the ground, but higher.

Tythus was idly spinning the spearhead around by its point with his hooves. It had burrowed a small pinprick into his desk, but he didn't seem to care. As I walked in, he glanced up and stopped, setting the fragment down flat. As there was nowhere else to sit in the room aside from the cot, I simply stood before the desk. It looked kind of ridiculous from my height, like a child's plaything.

Tythus began to speak. "Never in all my years did I think I'd have to see anything like this." He held up the spearhead. It glittered weirdly in the sunlight streaming in from the single window. "Do you know what this is made of, Echo?"

I shook my head. I had honestly no idea. It looked to be metal, but it seemed to be embedded with crystals. It was as if someone had taken a chromed steel and fused it with a bunch of crushed up mica.

He closed his eyes for a moment. "I thought not. This is known as arcanite. It is a very, very rare type of material. Once, long ago, the techniques for forging it were as widespread as its many uses."

"Uses? Like what?"

"Arcanite is incredibly strong. I doubt even you would be able to even scratch it. Once it has completely cooled off from its forging, it will retain shape indefinitely. It will never break, it will never dull. But that isn't what sets it apart...no. This is the only known material in Equestria that is resistant to magic."

Resistant to magic...that explained why he wasn't able to pick it up earlier with his telekinesis.

"This is a very, very dangerous artifact you've stumbled across. Do you realize the things one could do with this?"

I shook my head again. As far as I was concerned, it was just a weapon. Weapons are only made for one thing.

Tythus sighed, and leaned back into his chair. "That is a surprising relief, Echo."

"I'm not one for getting creative with items of warfare."

"You didn't seem to have a problem 'getting creative' on my gate," he dryly remarked.

"I used my claws. They are different - they are made for tunneling through rock. They're like your horn. I'm sure you have fewer reservations about using it than things specifically made for destruction."

He paused, before nodding slowly. "That's true." We lapsed into silence for a few moments. Tythus was focusing intently on the blade. I became fixated on a particularly blank area of wall behind his head.

"Where did you find this, exactly?" he finally said.

"In the Greenclaw den. It was the spear of the old alpha, or so I'm told. The haft rotted away, though."

Tythus said nothing in reply. Instead, he spun his chair around and hopped off. The captain strode over to his cot, and reached under it. He pulled a long, large trunk out from beneath, and magically lifted it onto the desk, facing him. The latches flicked open simultaneously. The lid opened. From my view, I couldn't see what was inside, but it was obviously of some sentimental value to him.

The captain rummaged around in the locker for a few moments. I heard the sound of clinks and clanks of small metal objects, the jingling of coins, and the rustling of papers. Finally, he seemed to find what he was looking for. With a flick of his head, a long, dark staff floated out from the bottom. Once this was out, he quickly put away the trunk back under his cot, before turning and levitating the staff above the desk.

"Are you familiar with zebra culture by any chance?" he asked me.

I hesitated for a moment, before drawing on my knowledge from the show. I knew very little about zebras as a whole. Judging an entire race off of few examples was an error I wasn't about to make, seeing as it'd been done to me several times now.

"Not much."

"They're fascinating, really. Instead of controlling nature, as we ponies do, they live with its given conditions. One might say that zebras are more at harmony with nature than Equestrians." He chuckled. "When I was still a young guard, I was sent on a mission to their lands, as an escort to a diplomat - some Canterlot uppercrust by the name of Lord Fancypants. I learned a lot, there. Experiencing a new culture...it's eye opening."

Dude, you're preaching to the choir.

"I befriended a particular zebra mare while I was there. She was a shaman, a practitioner of mystical arts and such. Oftentimes she would spend long hours meditating, perched upside-down atop this staff, of all things. When I left to return home, she gave me this to remember her by. That was almost twenty years ago, and it hasn't faded, or worn, or even cracked. Zebra magic is strange, indeed..." he faded away, getting a faraway look in his eye.

"Were you and her...you know." I made fists and bumped them together.

He cocked an eyebrow. "That's none of your business."

The slightest of smirks on his face told me everything I needed to know.

He raised the staff up higher, pointing one end toward me. I took hold of it, and he released his grip. It was warm to the touch, made of dark, dried wood. Faint symbols covered the entire length, which was straight as an arrow. A strip of faded cloth was tied to one end, like a ragged pennant.

"What does this have to do with the spearhead?"

"You said the haft was broken. Here's a new one."

I looked down at the medicine staff. It would be wrong to convert such a thing into a weapon of war. I looked back up at him and shook my head. "I'd rather not. Why are you giving something like this to me, anyway?"

Tythus snorted in amusement. "If there was any lesson I learned out in the savannah, it was that one always should have a choice. The spearhead will only permit one thing - that what it was made for. The staff is capable of many other things, perhaps greater, but it cannot take a life. Zebra magic prevents it from doing so. But...when you combine the two..."

I smiled. "You have the ability to choose. I like that."

"Exactly. You're going to need more than your claws tonight. Lives will be lost because of that. But this is what must happen."

"Okay, I don't like that."

"I know - which is why I'm not asking you to accept this. I'm ordering you."

With that, the captain picked up the spearhead with both hooves, and stuck the back end onto the tip of the stave. His horn lit up with a harsh golden light, and the staff...warped. The end of the arcanite was sucked into the wood, and the wood around the burrowing material tightly bound itself around it.

Tythus exhaled and pulled back. In my hands was the completed weapon, about my height. The leaf blade looked surprisingly natural alongside the tattooed pole. It glinted in the sunlight again. I frowned at this.

"It looks good with you," said the captain. "Appreciate this gift, Echo. Sometimes we have to do unpleasant things to ensure the safety of others."

"You can give gifts back," I moodily replied.

Tythus shook his head at this, and made the motions to dismiss me. As I turned to go, however, I paused at the doorway.

"Sir, that zebra you knew. What was her name? What happened to her?"

"Her name...was Zecora." He said it like he was sipping a fine wine, rolling it off his tongue with utmost reverence. "I don't know what happened to her. We parted ways long ago."

"If you wish to see her again, she lives near Ponyville, on the outskirts of the Everfree Forest."

His eyes went wide, the first significant expression of emotion he'd made this entire time. "How do you know that?"

"Internet." With that, I left him open-mouthed and blinking in shock. I gave an evil smirk to nopony in particular, slipping the spear into the straps that ran across my back, holding it in place over my left shoulder. With nothing left keeping me, I decided to head outside.

There were precious few hours left until the battle, and I intended to enjoy them.

(18) Fowl Play

When I was young, my father took me into the city. I'd never seen anything like it. The tallest things around where I'd lived were the trees...but here? The trees were scraggly, sickly things, growing out of the sidewalks ever thirty feet or so. They barely reached three stories tall. I remember looking at my first skyscraper. I actually fell over backwards from craning my head back to try and see the top. There were new sights and smells, new tastes and new noises. Everything was loud, fast and dirty.

Heh. The people weren't that much different.

In all honesty, I didn't like it that much. Too many bodies. Too many cars. Too many everything. Give me a nice shack in the woods, a good book, a stash of booze, and I'd pretty much be happy for life. Cities were always a little...overwhelming...for me. The irony of this is that I'd find myself living in one several years down the road, in a dingy little apartment above the Hungry Dragon restaurant, breathing in the smell of noodles and sesame chicken until it was all I could taste, even if I decided to eat something strong. It was a quiet little place, but it was mine.

I spent most of my time in there, avoiding the hustle and bustle of the outside world. It wasn't that I was a closet case. I just didn't like the city. Made me nervous. Skeptic. Sometimes afraid for my life.

The time spent in the solitude of Daring Do's treehouse did me wonders. I relaxed, for the first time in...a long time. Of course, I had to fear for my life on more than one occasion, but hey! It's a jungle out here. Literally. When I came to Wethoof, it wasn't bad at all. It was a small town, only about five or six hundred inhabitants. And I could always get away from that, even though there was a wall. A large ring of crop fields and grasslands encircled the actual town like a donut, then one found the wall. Walking through the fields was soothing for me. With the battle only hours away, I needed to relax. Now, however, that was probably impossible.

In the dead of night, I hadn't been able to see the full scale of the reinforcements. Now that it was daylight, I was boggled by what I saw.

There was, to put it simply, a city where there had only been space.

Tents, tents, and...surprise! More tents. A tent city. It completely encircled Wethoof, arranged in neat rows like streets. Dirt paths already pounded flat by hooves. There were even tall poles with glowing orbs attached to them every once and a while. Streetlights, I guessed. Ponies trotted here and there, some in protective barding and armor, others in just their coats. Pegasi, earth ponies and unicorns were all in representation.

It was a bit overwhelming for me, I have to admit. But, I just had to learn more. An opportunity like this was irresistible to my inner scientist. So, I whipped out my psychology binder, which I'd snagged on the way out of the barracks, and began to stroll through the new streets, taking down notes or observations at what I saw. Coconut, who now had nothing else to do thanks to my accidental frosting bomb, trotted along next to me, clearly just as impressed with the encampment as I was.

Above it all, the Benevolent Mercy hovered from where she was moored to the barracks belltower. She was a beautiful thing, indeed. It was built much differently than any other airship I'd seen. Instead of an undercarriage built into the bottom of the sleek, silver balloon, there was actually a ship hanging underneath from heavy chains, minus a mast.

This just blew me away. Such technology! Such innovation! SO MUCH SCIENCE! I was curious about everything. They say curiosity killed the cat - but I'm a dog. Nothing to worry about, right?

Wrong.

"Oy! Tall, dumb, and furry!" a familiar voice shouted over the hubbub, distracting me from what could have been a gloriously intense nerdgasm.

I spun on the spot, smoothly sliding my binder into my toga. I cocked an eyebrow at the speaker. Well, well, well. If it isn't the mercenary I'd been hearing about...

It was that gryphon again. He was covered in all sorts of feathers, reddish gold all around, except for his face and chest, which were white. He cut his way through the crowd like a knife, and most of the passing ponies avoided him like the plague. They had good reason, I suspect. That massive black sword strapped to his back looked like it could split a mountain in half. The mercenary swaggered up, calm as you please, and fixed me a look with hard, blue eyes. I crossed my arms and met his gaze as evenly as I could. It was with strange satisfaction that I noted I was a great deal taller than him, but then again, I was the equivalent of an NBA player here.

"So. You're that dog I've been hearing so much about. Gecko, right?" he said easily. His stare never wavered. It was rather unnerving.

"Echo." I lifted a single paw to scrawl.

"Sure, sure..."

The crowd, by this time, had resumed its natural course, with the exception of three new rocks in the stream. And still, he kept staring. It was beginning to creep me out.

"Can we help ya with something, mate?" Coconut finally asked.

"Yep," was all he said.

Coconut and I exchanged a glance. "And that would be...?"

"Well, for starters, you busted up half the stuff in my tent."

Ah. I had a feeling that one might come back to haunt me. "Sorry about that..." I sheepishly scratched of my head. Accidents happen! Maybe he'll forgive and forget.

"Well, isn't that nice, I always appreciate an apology. But a 'sorry' won't cut it."

Aw, fuckberries! Then what will? I recrossed my arms and tilted my head forward, throwing the top of my face into shadow. It not only served to possibly intimidate, but allowed me to furiously blink tears of pain away. Staring back at him was suicide!

"I've got a little proposal for you," he finally said. "I've got a bunch of broken stuff, and I'm rather upset over that. You, the idiot who broke it all, are going to help me...cool off as payment."

I swallowed loudly. Hopefully, his hearing wasn't as good as mine, or I'd have been a dead giveaway. "I call a time out."

Coconut and I turned our backs. I bent low, so he could whisper.

"Mate, I don't like this. Mercs aren't exactly the nicest sort of ponies. Hay, this fellow ain't even a pony!" The brown stallion was clearly as worried as I was. "Plus, he's under Frosty's payroll, apparently. If he tries something, which he probably will, and something happens to ya , we're gonna be bucked in the plots tonight. All of this will be for nothin'."

I nodded, frowning, before turning back to the gryphon. "And if I say no?"

The mercenary smirked, before lifting up one leg and snapping his fingers. Suddenly, several ponies that had been walking by turned towards us and stopped. They looked suspiciously bloodthirsty. The other passerby simply melted around us.

"You don't want to say that." He finally blinked, the entire conversation had been spent intently regarding us.

Shit. It never fails. I always run into the crazy ones. ALWAYS! But still, I needed to play along. I couldn't pay my debt to Tythus if I was dead... The battle was tonight, after all. Dammed if I do, double-dammed if I don't.

"Fine." The feathered bastard cracked a grin at this, and gestured me to follow him with a scaly talon. I warily did so. The surrounding ponies, whom were undoubtedly also mercenaries, flanked either side of Coconut and I, preventing us from wandering off.

Ugh, this was probably a good time for Disarray to show up. Where the hell was he, anyway?

In the skies high, high above Wethoof, a stormy gray alicorn, clad in a colorful robe, alit gracefully upon a thin cirrus cloud. He glanced around, before tossing his hood back, to reveal crafty, pink eyes that scanned the surrounding cloud layer with ease.

The alicorn sighed and stretched his wings. It felt good to be able to use them again. Even when below, he had to go about covered. Up here, though, past the heights of even the strongest pegasi, he was safe from the prying eyes of others.

The soft whoosh of wings alerted him to the arrival of company. He turned his head to the side, smirking at the sight of his guest. He was about to speak, when the sound of yet another pair of wings to his other side silenced whatever he'd been about to say. The alicorn cocked an eyebrow at the second arrival, who stepped forward.

"It is good to see you again, cousin Disarray..." It began.

"...You've been away for too long." The first finished with perfect timing.

Disarray coughed politely into one hoof. "Yes. Well. Had a bit of a falling out with Mother. Had to lay low for a while, get off the family's radar. Oh! And did I mention the part where I've been trapped for the past, I don't know...two-thousand or so years?"

The second laughed softly. It sounded like the tinkling of bells. "What is this 'radar' you speak of, cousin..?"

"...We never understood where you get these strange sayings from." The first continued.

"Even I don't understand the place I get them from." Disarray sighed, shaking his head, before looking up. "It's good to see you again, cousins. I've been quite lonely."

The first smiled, while the second went over to the edge of the cloud and peered over. "Ah, but it seems you've been quite busy socializing..."

"...The foreigner you travel with, and his companions. I never imagined you of all ponies to have friends."

Disarray humphed, and melodramatically pointed his nose in the air. "I wouldn't call them that. More like..," he waved a hoof around as he thought. "...Like 'acquaintances.' Oh! And I'm sure they'd love to meet you two. Bet Fluffy would get a kick out of it."

"Perhaps..."

"...But still. You're changing, Disarray."

"Oh, Yes! Two millennium of solitary confinement does that to you," The alicorn dryly quipped.

"Undoubtedly. But there are greater changes in store for you..."

"...As well as those you follow."

Disarray said nothing for a while, instead opting to look down at the distant green splotch known as the Great Southern Rainforest. From here, he could see the edges of the jungles, far off in the north. The world had truly been transformed since his imprisonment. Once, there had been desert where forest now stood. Where mighty plains had once rolled, mountains had risen and fallen. Change - it was a constant that even his chaotic nature had to abide by.

"The metamorphosis?" he finally said.

"It comes to us all..."

"...And you're long overdue."

The two joined him at the cloud's edge. He felt the comforting touch on his shoulders as they softly rubbed up against him. "How is Mother? And Auntie Luna? I understand she suffered a similar fate to my own."

"They've missed you greatly. You should return to them at once..."

"...You will be welcomed with open wings, cousin. They've changed as well in the time you've been gone."

Disarray frowned. As tempting as it was to return home, after all these years, he couldn't bring himself to do it. Not yet. Maybe never. "Only you two know of my return?" he switched the conversation's direction.

"Yes. We were nearby when you first emerged..."

"...Though it pains us to carry this burden. Much has transpired since that time of grief and sorrow..."

"...It would do you well to find out what."

Disarray thoughtfully tugged on his mustache, and wrapped his wings around them. "Maybe I will, when I've had my fill of adventuring. They waited two-thousand years, they can wait a little longer. I've a whole new world to see." He glanced down at Wethoof and smiled a crafty smile. "And I have a feeling it's going to be getting quite the shake up, soon."

He rubbed a hoof on his chest, inspecting it for a few moments, then firmly stomping it into the cloud. "Oh! I heard cousin Mi Amore Cadenza got engaged! To the captain of the Royal Guard, no less! How did that come about?"

The two cracked grins that spoke of a very interesting story.

"Yo, fuzzball!"

I snapped to, glancing around. The mercenary camp wasn't like the rest of the tent city. It was a simple circle of tents, with a fire pit off to one side, a few barrels in between the ragged tents. A wide, open space took up the middle, made of dry, hard-packed earth. The gryphon eyed him from across the clearing. Scruffy looking ponies, mostly pegasi, and a motley crew of gryphons stood around the edges, curiously watching the spectacle. These were the mercenaries, otherwise known as the "Griffin Pirates."

Their leader, was, of course, the crazy one with the broadsword. His name was Griffin. Griffin the gryphon, to be precise.

I know, right? Silly name.

I turned to face him fully from where I'd been idly inspecting a patchwork tent. While not nearly well equipped as the rest of the forces, the mercenaries surely looked the part of the "Pirates" section of the title. Griffin unslung his sword and stabbed it into the earth, halfway up to the hilt, before swaggering up to me. He didn't stop until he was in my personal phone booth of space, a firm scowl on his beak.

Uh oh. This doesn't look good for Echo. "Can't we just talk this over?" I suggested.

He snorted, idly inspecting a talon. "Maybe you haven't heard, but that's not how we pirates do things around here. We solve our problems with our talons and hooves. We're rough, tough, and bad as sin. And I'm the baddest of the bunch. I'm so bad-" he leaned in closer, "-that I'm afraid of waking up in the morning; because of how bad I might have gotten overnight."

Several of the gathered pirates snickered:

"Ooooo!"

"He's gonna get it!!"

"Better get the shovel. He'll have us taking away whatever's left..."

Coconut, surrounded by a ragged assortment of pirates on the sidelines, rolled his eyes.

Seriously? Smack talk? Very well. PREPARE TO MEET YOUR MAKER! I leaned down as well, until we were almost eyeball to eyeball, then pulled back. "So, it's a match of intellect, then? I'd rather not have a battle of wits with you. After all, it's considered unsportsmanlike to fight an unarmed opponent."

"Oh, snap!"

"No he didn't!"

OH YES HE DID.

Griffin laughed. "Ho-ho! I like you. You're going to be fun." He tilted his head toward the monstrous black broadsword stuck in the ground. "You like? Saw you looking at it. That's made of dragonscale, right there. Cuts through just about everything."

I nodded. "Nice." Then, I undid my spear from my harness and firmly planted it into the ground, spearhead first. "You like?" He nodded too. "Have a closer look, then!" I pulled back on the top of the haft, bending the shaft a bit, and let go.

The spear whipped forward and bopped him on the beak.

Bap!

Nobody moved for a full ten seconds. You could hear a pin drop on a pillow. Then, he laughed again. The pirates laughed. Everybody laughed. The he scowled again, and said, "You got some fight in you. Good. Let's get it out, then. We're going to have a little throwdown. You, and me. Settle our differences, the pirate way."

I maintained my stoic position of arm-crossed, hood-down. Just maintain your cool, man. Don't let them see you shaking, don't let them see your knees knocking...

Griffin suddenly spun around and swaggered back to his sword. "Ring it up!" he called. I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding in. A couple of pirates scrambled forward and hastily dug a rough circle in the ground around us. I guessed it to be about twenty feet in diameter. When the ring was finished, they quickly scampered back to the sidelines. I saw a few begin placing bets. I awkwardly pulled my spear up and cocked it over one shoulder. I almost dropped it, my palms were so sweaty.

Gods, I hate crowds...

The head pirate ripped his mighty blade out of the ground and leveled it at me. "Blunt 'em!" He barked. Two unicorns stepped forward from their ranks, horns aglow, surrounding the black blade of his sword and the silvery-white of my spearhead with a sparkly aura.

"First one forced out of the ring or knocked unconscious loses the match. No step-outs. Do this and we're square. Ready?"

I glanced down at my spear. It was visibly shaking. Along with the rest of me. For the love of Betty White... If I'd been presented with this suddenly, I wouldn't have had time to think about it. I would have been fine! Where is my boost of adrenaline when I need it? This was very, very bad. Mainly because here I was in the ring with a professional soldier, who was going to beat the tar out of me holding a weapon...

...I had no idea how to use this fucking thing.

"Go!"

SONOFABI-

WHACK! THUD!

"Ouch, now that's gotta hurt!" Coconut muttered to himself. He had managed to slink out of the crowd of pirates around the ring, and was now standing on top of one of a few barrels near a tent to get a better view of the action.

And by "action," that meant watching the gryphon open several different cans of whoop-ass on his opponent.

At once.

BOOF!

The sudden sight of the diamond dog spinning crazily through the air, was, despite the situation, slightly hilarious. The big, usually stoic creature was being thrashed around by a being half his size. Coconut shook his head, trying to repress a grin at his friend's expense. But he was in real danger - that much, Coconut was sure of. Time to focus.

What was going on here was actually quite commonplace on a pirate ship. Two crew members have a disagreement, and agree to settle their aggression in the ring.

He was somewhat familiar with pirate culture. Several years ago, during Wethoof's heyday, airships from across Equestria occasionally stopped by to partake in the gem trade. Occasionally, some of the crew members would stop by in the tavern that he'd spent so much time in growing up. Strange tales of far off places, exotic creatures, and different cultures often permeated the tavern's common room late in the evening. He'd spent many a sleepless night listening to such tales. Coconut sighed wistfully. Good to see that had finally paid off for something.

A sudden blur of motion to his side caused him to glance around. A pegasus had swiftly landed on the barrel next to him. Tannish-gold coat, a pocketed shirt, signature pith helmet cocked back over a charcoal mane...Coconut's eyes bugged out of his head in shock.

"Miss Daring Do?" he gasped. He'd heard rumors she was in town. The pegasus had a near-legendary status in these parts. Her exploits were even turned into stories, after all! She'd been buying supplies from Wethoof for years now, but had rarely actually visited the place.

The explorer merely nodded in acknowledgement, watching the fight with a worried expression. "Sorry to be rude, but that's my friend in there," she said.

"Ya don't say..." Coconut was baffled. That diamond dog sure knew how to get around.

They watched as Griffin executed a lightning fast back flip over the reeling diamond dog, booting him in the back with a powerful kick. The dog was sent flying, almost to the line carved in the ground. He rolled to avoid a crushing tackle from the gryphon, scrabbling desperately towards the edge in an attempt to flee. "Oh, no you don't!" cried the pirate, seizing his victim by the tail and sending him flying once again into the center of the ring. The crowd cheered.

Daring Do shot Coconut a look. "Say, don't you know him as well?"

Coconut nodded solemnly. "Aye."

She rounded on him, and bluntly demanded, "Then are you with them, or us?"

"Define them." Coconut lowered his voice, both eyebrows raised. "If yer asking me if I'm in league with these hotheads, then no. I'm with Tythus. Why...why do ya ask?""

"Him," she said simply, pointing into the crowd, off to the far left. "He's had it in for Echo since we came here."

Coconut followed her hoof, running his gaze over the ragged mercenaries. "Celestia's pearly flanks!" he cursed. There, standing in the shadow of a tent, was the mayor of Wethoof; Mayor Frost Snap. "This isn't good. He's gonna try something! These pirates - they're in his payroll!"

"I agree. Question is, what?" The explorer watched Frost intently. Coconut ran a hoof over his short blond mohawk, turning his gaze back to the fight.

BAM! POW!

He winced - Echo was going to be feeling that one in the morning. Hopefully, he wasn't planning on having any pups in the future... Coconut stomped a hoof on the barrel. "We can't stop it alone, miss. Let's work together on this, yeah?"

Daring Do grimly smiled. "Yeah. You keep watch on the mayor, I'll get ready to stop the fight if something happens. Thanks for the help...uh..." she trailed off.

"Coconut, miss. Pleased ta meet ya; always been a fan." The chef grinned back, before hopping off the barrel and slinking his way around the edges of the crowd, without so much as making a noise. Being raised in the rainforest had some advantages that other ponies wouldn't expect. Namely, every pony who lived here knew how to move like a ghost. It wasn't just a useful skill when venturing into the forest, it was a necessity. Stealth means survival.

On silent hooves, Coconut positioned himself behind a tent. Frost was sitting at the far end of the small alley between two more, still as a statue. Coconut peeked his head out around the corner. There! A crate! Perfect to hide under.

Coconut gingerly stepped into the alleyway, not daring to breathe. The mayor paid him no heed, still. One step. Two steps. Three steps. Still no hint that he'd been discovered. The earth pony swallowed nervously. The box was in his reach. He gently, oh so very gently, lifted the lid up with one hoof.

Creeeeeeeaaaaaaaaak!

Horeseapples! Coconut froze. Frost Snap's ear twitched. The world suddenly shrank to the size of the alley.

Unbelievably, the mayor ignored the noise. Coconut quickly slipped into the crate and lowered it over himself. He was closer, now. Close enough to hear Frost muttering to himself.

"With what? No...no, no no. We know what we need to do," the mayor quietly said to himself. Cconut pressed his face into the side of the box, straining to hear.

"She'll make sure nothing happens to them. She promised. This has to happen." Frost paused, and shifted his gaze to his side. "What? No. I'd never... She'd never..."

He seemed to be talking to somepony that wasn't there. Coconut cocked an eyebrow. He knew that the mayor's mental capacities had been somewhat...skewed. It wasn't a secret. Regardless, Frost was the best leader they'd ever had, even with his eccentricities. Wethoof had been willing to forgive him for those on account of his history. But still, he seemed like he'd slipped even more.

"No!" Frost suddenly growled. "That thing as well? The Styx...how could it accept them without you? I thought..." He flinched backwards, almost colliding with the box Coconut was hiding in. "Not her...I can't do it to her." Frost's head abruptly whipped to the side, and he stumbled, as if struck. "Gah!"

The unicorn staggered back to his hooves, breathing hard. "You're right," he finally said. "This needs to end now. We can't let anypony stand in our way." His horn flashed. A sharp whistle pierced the air. "For the greater good." Then, the mayor turned and bolted down the alley.

The second he had rounded the corner, Coconut exploded out from under the box. That had to have been some kind of signal! He dashed into the crowd. The pirates suddenly turned and braced themselves together, preventing him from seeing the ring. "DARING!" he yelled. Hopefully, she'd react in time to whatever was going to happen next.

Daring Do heard the call over the din. She brought out her whip, eyes scanning wildly around for any hint of danger. "Oh no..." One of the unicorns maintaining the blunting spell suddenly stopped stopped channeling! The sparkles surrounding the gryphon's fearsome sword evaporated as he brought it over his head, the diamond dog sprawled on the ground before him.

"ECHO! LOOK OUT!" Daring screamed. She sprang off the barrels, her whip already in motion. Something wrapped around her hoof, rudely halting her flight and slamming her into the earth. It was that blasted unicorn, wrapping a telekinetic grip around her leg! She twisted back towards the pit. Griffiin's sword was held high, the black blade painfully reflecting the sunlight.

Too slow! thought Daring.

Daring could only watch as Echo looked up from where he was lying prone. He twitched. His pupils suddenly narrowed into predatory slits. He lunged, mouth wide open in a primal snarl...

The blade came down.

SCREEEECH!

The gryphon came at me like a torpedo, clearing the gap between us in a split second. He rammed me hard in the stomach, before pulling back and bashing the side of my head with his sword. Small bluebirds began to spin around my face as I comically staggered about.

The sword flicked out again, taking my feet out from under me and sending me sprawling. I looked up to see him poised for an overhand chop. The blow struck me in the shoulder, denting the single epaulet I wore. Had the blade not been magically dulled, that might have taken my arm off... Griffin suddenly lunged forward, grabbing me by the toga, and beat his powerful wings. We rocketed off the ground to several feet above the circle, before he flipped and slung me back down to earth.

I hit the ground with a wheeze, "Whoof!" and attempted to climb out of the small crater my impact had left. Something crashed into my backside. I felt the grip of powerful talons lift me into the air once again.

Oh, hell no! Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me!

I craned my neck and chomped down on the avian leg gripping my shoulder. Griffin screeched and let go, giving me a powerful kick with his lion half. Once again, I cratered the pit. But this time, as I rose from the hole, I was smiling.

Griffin landed some distance away, examining the gash on his leg.

I smirked, licking my lips and spitting out a feather. "Tastes like chicken!"

Okay...now THAT was a bad move.

This time, I didn't even have time to register the movement of the sword, it was so fast. It took me on the arm, sending a lance of pain through my system as I dropped my spear in shock. He danced around me, whirling like a top. A second blow landed on the back of my knee, roughly sending me into a kneel. A final blow struck the back of my head. Stars exploded through my vision as I felt two paws buck my back, sending me flying across the area to land a few feet away from the line.

Sanctuary! Sweet salvation on a silver platter! RUN AWA-A-A-A-AY!

I scrambled forwards, towards the line of surrender. "Oh no you don't!" came his voice from behind me. Something grabbed my tail and heaved, sending me spinning through the air once again. A brutal collision mid-air resulted in me eating dirt once again.

Gods, I love the taste of dirt. It's so...dirty.

I rolled, barely avoiding another swing of the sword. It stuck in the ground, and the gryphon heaved at it with the intention to continue to the beating. This is my chance!

I lashed out with a rear leg, kicking Griffin's talons away from the blade, and sprang, tucking into a ball and steamrolling him into the ground. Coming out of the roll, I spun around and tried to swipe him with a pawfull of claws. No dice. He nimbly dipped backwards every time I swung at him, avoiding me with the grace of a professional boxer.

I overextended on a slash, and he stepped inside my reach, smoothly nudging my arm away and headbutting me in the face. I sat down, hard, as he spun on his forelegs and delivering a boneshattering kick to the center of my chest. I slid several feet before coming to a rest flat on my back, the breath completely knocked out of me.

There was a sharp blast of sound, like a whistle. It rang painfully in my ears, like nails on a chalkboard. I heard someone yelling something. Was...was that Coconut?

Griffin seemed to register the noise as well, turning from me to calmly stride over to where his sword was still wedged into the earth and yank it free. He approached me slowly, his weapon cocked jauntily over one shoulder.

"Well, that was fun!" he said. "But I think I'm done here. Got to make my bits somehow." He raised the black blade high, like an executioner's axe. "No hard feelings or anything. Just doing my job."

I blinked in reply, too winded to do anything else.

The sparkly aura around the weapon suddenly vanished. Oh, shit...

"ECHO, LOOK OUT!" someone screamed. I turned to look. There, almost inside the ring, was Daring Do, sprawled on the ground as the unicorn formerly maintaining the blunting spell dragged her back into the crowd. Our eyes met. In them, I could see myself reflected in the magenta depths.

Something inside me...woke up.

An unbelievable surge of heat burst out of my gut and screamed through my extremities. Something funny happened to my senses; all sharpened dramatically; hearing, sight, touch, taste, smell...and there was something else there, too. Something I'd never felt before. For a split second, my body flickered, like it had in the dream. Short, dark, fur, greenish paws...

That split second was all it took for the blade to fall.

Move! something inside me demanded. I obliged, completely out of control of my body.

I lunged forward, mouth agape to meet the attack...

SCREEEECH!!

Everything ground to a halt. The pirates stood in utter disbelief. Coconut shoved his way through until he came to the pit, his expression suddenly matching the others perfectly. Daring struggled up from where she was on the ground, the unicorn's spell completely forgotten. Her jaw dropped. They looked at the sight in complete dumbfoundment.

The diamond dog had stopped the blow...

By catching the sword mid-swing...

With his teeth.

The dog suddenly became a blur of motion, twisting his neck, ripping the sword from Griffin's grasp to fling it into the earth some distance away. He sprang up, took a few steps, cocked one fist back, and punched the pirate right in the face.

The gryphon became a feathered bullet as he was catapulted right off his talons and through the crowd, knocking them aside like bowling pins, before blasting through his tent, which promptly collapsed on top of him.

Echo relaxed and spat out a tooth, looking at it disinterestedly for a moment before mashing it into the dirt with a paw.

I shook my head violently, coming out of the strange rush that had once again saved my life. I mentally reviewed the times that it has done so.

~Ahuizotl's pets? -in pieces.

~Ahuizotl? -rotting in a pit.

~Big Momma? -cracked ribs.

~Pirate? -blown off like Team Rocket on a bad day.

Echo : 4. Death : 0.

Glancing over at the wreckage of the tent, I saw Griffin pulling himself out of the wreckage, dazedly shaking his head. I held up my paw, inspecting it carefully. How the hell did I do that? I...don't even remember it. There was the sword, coming at me, and then...screaming? I sighed in disbelief. This was like the hydra all over again. One second, I'm going to die, the next...I do something awesome. And I'm not even aware of it.

Hey look! Daring! I cheerfully waved to her. The explorer pushed her way out of the still-stunned crowd, quickly joined by Coconut. "Hi!" I said. Oh, wait! They've never met before! Better introduce them. "Daring, this is-"

"-Coconut. We're already acquainted." Daring patted the big guy on the shoulder, who looked at the spot she touched him like it had turned to solid gold. She looked around. "Uh, we should probably get going, now."

Coconut snapped out of his daze. "Yep. And I gotta talk to ya, mate. Frost was here - probably planned this whole thing."

I scoured the crowd, squinting in vain to try and find my elusive adversary. No such luck availed me. The mayor of Wethoof had yet to actually meet me face to face. And yet, I was strangely glad for that. Things would probably get ugly if we did.

A commotion on the far side of the crowd got my attention. The pirates parted as five familiar figures cut through them, each armored in the signature forest-colored barding of the Wethoof Town Guard, except for the lead, who wore a battered, but polished, silver curiass.

Captain Tythus, flanked by his lieutenants; Cloud Nine, Sparky, and Baritone, trained withering gazes on the pirates as they reached the center of the pit. Ginger Snap, who brought up the rear, broke off and approached us.

"Heard the commotion. Sorry it took so long," she grunted. She adjusted the thick black goggles now around her neck and turned to look at the others, who had begun to drag the dazed gryphon mercenary out of the wreckage. Tythus's horn sparked to life, surrounding him in a thick, semi-transparent golden sphere, which he levitated easily.

Some of the pirates made forwards as if to save their leader. Sparky crouched; intense sparks began shooting off her mane and coat. Cloud Nine threateningly whipped opened her wings, sending a powerful gust of wind out the ruffled the manes of everypony present. Baritone growled and stomped a single hoof to the ground. A ring of cracks spiraled out from the point of impact. "I wouldn't do that if I were you," he rumbled.

"Ginger Snap, escort Echo to someplace safe - preferably away from the barracks. He would be expected there," Tythus barked. "Hold until nightfall. I'll signal when it's time for action." He glanced at the captive gryphon. "As for you..." he growled, "We're going to have a chat."

Griffin the gryphon scowled, before attempting to cleave his way out of the sphere. The sword hit the barrier and bounced back, vibrating like a metal tuning rod. As the four brave guards left the circle, dragging his prison with them, he put his talons up onto it and looked back pleadingly.

I gave him the finger.

"We'll head back to my room in the tavern. It's a safe place to stay until nightfall," Daring whispered. Ginger nodded in agreement, and turned to go, intent on making a speedy exit (stage left) before the other pirates came to their senses. She bumped into something.

Surprisingly, I found Disarray standing before us, in his alicorn form and tye-dye robe, looking at the wreckage of the pirate's tent. He gave me a gleeful look and cracked a cheeky grin.

"Now that's what I call a Falcon Punch!" he proclaimed, pointing to the destroyed tent.

My facepaw could be heard in the halls of Asgard. Also, I may have given myself a concussion, or made an already existing one extremely worse.

"Disarray! Just where were you when all of this went down?!" Daring got up in his face. "You could have stopped this before it started!"

"Er...who is this?" Coconut asked me, eyeing the disguised alicorn. Disarray was quite lanky in this form, and stood much taller than he, something I bet upset him a little. Ginger looked confused as well. I realized she didn't know about Disarray's interesting bloodline, nor his ability to shift forms.

I wearily sighed. "This is Disarray. He's a friend...I think. We'll explain it later."

"That's Disarray...?" Ginger murmured. "The buck is going on here?"

I shrugged. The last time I had any idea of what was really going on, I was in a lonely coffee shop, discussing the theoretical physics of magic with a crusty old fart in a tracksuit.

"Mate, you seem to run into the strangest ponies." Coconut snorted derisively.

Somewhere, somehow, Discord was probably laughing his ass off. Bastard. He had been right, though. I do seem to run into rather extreme situations...

Meanwhile, the argument continued: "I've said it once, I'll say it twice: I'm here for when you need me. Not when you want me," stated Disarray to a fuming Daring Do. "Although, I could see why you wanted me. I know I'm handsome, but please, mare. Control yourself."

Daring made a curious noise of exasperation, before pulling her pith helmet over her head. Several muffled curses issued forth from the muted pegasus. She finally emerged. "I think this qualifies as a need situation. He could have died!"

"Ah, but did he?"

Nope! And I've no idea how I pulled that off! Blech. I need a drink. Hopefully there's some hard cider at Daring's place.

"No...well...still. He could have!"

"He is alive, therefore, you didn't need my assistance. Bam! Argument won. Score, team me." He stuck a hoof out and pointed it at her. "La-hoooo! Zaaaa-her!" He narrowed his eyes at her and poked her in the chest. "Loser!"

Whisssssh-CRACK!

"Agh! Hey, put that thing away! No fair!" Disarray cried, as he was promptly chased away by Daring Do, who was wielding her whip with surprising accuracy. The pegasus uttered several more expletives through the whip in her mouth as she tore off after him.

"Help! Dominatrix on the loose! She'll break out the fuzzy pink hoofcuffs next! Run for your lives! Hide 'yo wife, hide 'yo foals, and hide 'yo husband too, 'cuz she rapin' everypony up in here!" Disarray screamed from somewhere ahead.

Whisssssh-CRACK!

Wow. She's really freaking good with that thing. Why do I suddenly feel jealous of Disarray?

"THIS IS TOO KINKY FOR ME! AAAUGH! OW-OW-OW!"

Coconut and I exchanged a glance, while Ginger buried her face in one hoof, muttering something dark under her breath.

"...We should probably go now."

"...Yup."

(19) A Scratch Behind the Ears

The sun was setting.

I tried to tune out the sounds of discussion coming from the next room. It wasn't that hard; all I had to do was flatten my ears to my head. The drone from the airships finished off the rest.

The Benevolent Mercy, the reinforcements' massive silver flagship, had been moored to the belltower atop the barracks. The setting sun tinged its closed gun ports a golden bronze. It was now joined by two smaller ships, which served as almost everything from destroyers to cargo carriers, sometimes multiple roles at once. If the Mercy was a graceful whale, then these two ships, the Mercy II and the Mercy III, were like sharks. Sleek and trim, with smaller, shorter ships hanging underneath the balloons.

Both were currently tethered together, resting on the ground as villagers began boarding. They would be serving as a safe haven for the civilians of Wethoof while the battle was fought. The precaution was necessary. Should the hydras somehow get inside the walls, the town would be effectively become a deathtrap.

The villagers would have a skeleton crew operating the Mercy II to make sure the ship didn't break loose and drift away. Aside from that, all the military personnel would be fighting. Nopony from Wethoof knew how to fly them, and less than half had ever seen one (bless their hearts, the backwoods country bumpkins.) The Mercy III would simply be used like a side car, as it was tethered to the former. Extra space for the entire village, several hundred of them, to reside in safety.

They'd arrived only an hour ago. I'd watched them fly in from over the top of the storm front that circled the devastated area around Wethoof. Already, ponies were beginning to prepare for the long night ahead.

The townsfolk were packing small bags full of belongings and food for the stay. The weather team would be remaining behind until the last possible second, keeping the clouds away to ensure that the battlefield would be bone-dry for the flames to take. I could see ponies moving from the town to the airships, sometimes in little clusters, sometimes alone. All, however, were as mute as I was. No words were said. The worry for their homes and friends in the Wethoof Guard poured off them in waves.

They weren't the only ones: the boisterous tent-city had fallen silent as well. The soldiers and officers alike had retreated to their own little places, performing last minute repairs, sitting with friends, or simply reflecting. I had asked Ginger about this. "Taking a life is something nopony would do lightly," she'd said morosely, any trace of her usual venom or crankiness gone. "And tonight, we will be doing a lot of that. Too much, I think. But there's no other way. So we have to prepare, to ask forgiveness for what we are about to do. To steel ourselves for death, both inflicted and received." With that, she'd lapsed into silence. I could respect that. All life is sacred to a pony. Taking it away is something that must be given extreme consideration. And they weren't violent naturally. Equestria's standing army was small. Very, very small. Less than twenty-thousand troops were active at any given time, excluding the Royal Guard and city forces like the Wethoof Guard.

The word "War" was not even in their dictionary.

I would know. I read the damn thing.

And so, Wethoof had become like a ghost town, except the ghosts were still alive. It was a lot different from my own experience in the military, I'll say that much. No psych-ups, parades, or crowds to wish you off to fight. Only quiet things and contemplation, from the highest officer to the lowest grunt.

At least...for everypony else. Where I am is a whole other story.

Crack!

"Augh! The buck is that thing!" I heard Coconut cry from the next room.

"That thing prefers to be known as a draconequus. And a very sexy one at that," Disarray could be heard wryly stating. Ah, he must have shown them his other form.

Daring's place at the tavern had more than enough room to accommodate us all. It was sparsely furnished, but then again, it wasn't something anyone actually lived in. A simple kitchen, a living room, a bath/bedroom. More or less a standard small apartment, except that the landlord had decided to decorate as they do in the jungle. Oh, and there was a hole in the roof, patched over with plywood. When Coconut, Ginger and I had asked about it, Disarray had awkwardly coughed and muttered something about "Star Command," and "Space Rangers."

I had promptly doubled over in laughter, while the ponies were left in the dust.

Then, of course, Disarray had begun to explain himself. Who he was. What he was. When he was from. Why he was here.

I'd heard it before, so I'd excused myself to get some time to think and prepare.

And still, the sun kept setting.

I was in the bedroom, sitting on the bed and looking out the window. All of my gear, including my armor, lay out on the bed behind me. We had made a stop at the barracks (after Daring had thoroughly beaten some sense into our resident draconequus) and retrieved all our possessions needed for tonight. We made sure we weren't seen.

It's somewhat sobering when everything you own can be laid out in front of you, and not even cover half of a bed. Not that I place much standing on the amount of stuff one owns relating to happiness, but still. It makes one feel, how do I put this, lighter. I wasn't sure if I enjoyed the sensation or not.

I picked up my backpack and emptied it onto the bedspread. Strips of cloth from my long-destroyed pants and shirt tumbled out, along with my switchblade, my binder, and...oh. My wallet.

It was a regular wallet. Leather. A few places for cards, a clear slot for one's ID, and two pockets for cash and other items too big for the card slots. I didn't keep much in it. A debit card, my driver's licence, no more than twenty-five dollars in cash, and a "Get Out of Jail Free" card from Monopoly. I looked at the licence. A familiar visage stared back at me, a neutral smile on its face. My face. My old face, at least. I repressed a sobering surge of nostalgia that crept up unbidden.

I smacked the wallet closed and put it back in my pack.

My psychology binder came next. The first half was filled with diagrams, charts, and detailed notes relating to a great many aspects of the human mind. In my spare time, I had translated the language to Equestrian. Standard English now stood side by side with the beautiful flowing characters. It was with a snort of disbelief that I realized that I vastly preferred writing in the latter. Thinking, as well. Beyond the psychology papers were my own notes on the Equestrian language, vastly expanded from my time at the treehouse and my experiences around Wethoof.

I found a few sketches of Daring Do in the very back. I'd almost forgotten I drew these. I gently traced a claw along the curvature of her face. The mare was drawn in detail, sitting on her haunches on the treehouse deck, staring off into the jungle with that look in her eye, the one that said "Look out, world, here I come!" I sort of missed the time it was just me and her.

Wait...did I just say that?

Whoa! Possessive, much? Come on, man. Get a hold of yourself! You've got a job to do. Time to concentrate on what's important. What's important. I mean, it's not like you've got the hots for her, right?

...Right?

...

...

...Fuck.

I realized I couldn't answer that question. It was undeniable that I thought of her differently than the other ponies I've met. Why shouldn't I? She was the first one. Within an hour of meeting her, we saved eachother's lives. Daring more so mine than I hers. I heavily respected her for who she was and what she did.

She is...special to me.

I could say that much, at least. Plus, she's quite a looker!

Regardless, I was determined not jump into anything. If there's anything being in Equestria has taught me, it's that I should be using my head more. I had a brain, and a damn powerful one at that! The last time I ignored it, I ended up forcibly conscripted to fight a horde of ravenous, mutated, four-headed, scaly monstrosities. And I was going to be facing them tonight, whether I liked it or not (I really didn't like it.) No. I needed to think things over carefully, here. I knew very, very little about hybrid couples. Aside from Captain Tythus' long-ago fling with Zecora, I couldn't think of any others. And even then, at least both of them were remotely similar species. Daring Do was a pegasus.

And I was about as far from a pony as the Titanic was from daylight.

Actually...Disarray was proof of one such relationship. But look and see how that turned out...

Even then, this wasn't factoring her opinions into the mix - which were unknown to me. I had never pressed her on the matter. Such was her business, until she decided to reveal them, for better or worse. I do know that she cares for me, though. As friends, at the very least. After all, without her, I'd be a rotting corpse in the bottom of that river, with my head half-torn off. She patched my throat up. I placed a paw on the familiar scar, running my finger across the line of skin that circled the front of my neck like a necklace. Speaking of necklaces...

Her compass sat next to my folded toga. It was still tied to the bootlace that had once been so critical to my survival. Funny, how something so mundane as a bootlace could be such a pivotal thing. I dangled the compass by a claw, watching it spin. With a flick of my finger, I opened it up. The needle was spinning crazily.

It didn't stop.

Neither did the sun.

I heard the door to the bedroom click open. Daring Do's signature husky voice registered somewhere in my thoughts. "Hey, you alright in here? Disarray's still going through his shapeshifting routine. Thought you might want to get a look at Ginger's face. It's priceless!"

With a sharp creak, the binder quickly closed, hiding the sketches from my view as she entered through the doorway. I stuffed it into the pack with more force than I should have.

"Yeah. I'm fine." I dangled her compass before me. "This is yours. Found it in my pack." I tossed it to her. She easily dipped her head and caught the string in her mouth, before sending it flying back.

"Keep it," she said warmly. "I have one on me already." Turning a little she patted her flank with a wing. The compass rose stood proudly emblazoned there, a testament to her legendary prowess of exploration. I realized at that moment that she wasn't wearing anything. Ponies usually go around in the buff, but I'd grown used to her in clothes...

I swallowed, slipped the compass around my neck, and suddenly become completely absorbed in shuffling my gear around the bed.

Daring trotted over to the other side and pulled out her saddlebags from underneath, tossing them onto the empty side of the bed. Medicine, matches, spikes, rope, if it had to do with adventure, it spilled out of them.

Eager to distract myself from the fact that both of us were naked (damn it, why is this bothering me all of a sudden?) I took a closer look at her things. "How do you keep that much stuff in there?" I asked her. "Your bags should be bursting from so much."

"Ah, you noticed?" she said with a hint of pride. "I had these enchanted awhile back. You can throw as much as you want into them, and they'll never be overfilled. The unicorn that performed the spell kept going on about dimensional compression, or whatever that is."

"Really? May I see them?"

She shrugged, "Knock yourself out!" and began to organize her things as well.

I gingerly picked up the saddlebags and looked inside them. It seemed normal...until I decided to put a paw inside. I realized with a start that I couldn't feel the bottom! I reached in further. And further. When I had reached into the saddlebags up to my shoulder, Daring's laughter broke me out of my amazement. "Hay, Echo, careful you don't fall into that thing!" she joked. It was a good suggestion. From the outside perspective, it seemed as though my arm had been severed somewhere above the elbow. But I could feel everything, intact, inside the bag. I withdrew it and wiggled my fingers, staring at the bag in amazement.

Motherfucking magic...

"As long as you can handle all the weight of whatever you put inside, you can pretty much carry anything you can fit into the opening. Neat, huh?" I nodded in agreement, still slightly stunned, and gave it back. "How do you think I'm so prepared all the time?" she patted the saddlebags fondly. "Always pays to expect the unexpected."

I held up my own tattered pack with one paw. "Think I could get that for mine? I can carry a lot more than a pony, and it would help to not have a huge bundle strapped to me."

"Eh...probably. Not here, though. There aren't any unicorns who know the spells." She removed a rumpled, pocketed shirt from her pile of things and put it on. Her pith helmet quickly resumed it's usual position atop her charcoal, gray-streaked mane. "Most cities have tailors that'll do it. For a fee, of course. Do you have any bits?"

I shook my head. My entire personal wealth was amassed in space big enough to lay a small child.

"Aw, don't worry, I can spot you some."

My ears pricked up. "Really?"

"Of course! I've got more bits than I know what to do with! How do you think I paid for the treehouse?"

That was admittedly something I had been wondering.

She continued, "A lot of the treasures I find I send back to museums and the like. They're usually the ones who sponsor me. Of course, I am entitled to a finder's fee for every haul. And several of the places I've cracked open have been...quite lucrative," she admitted somewhat bashfully. "And nopony misses a few relics out of a cache of hundreds. If you know the right ponies, you can make a lot off of them."

I snorted with amusement. That's Daring Do, for you. She's chock full of surprises.

I glanced out the window. The glory of the sunset triggered a kaleidoscopic array of reds, pinks, oranges, and purples. It was mostly red, though. It won't be long now. This mess has all finally come to a head...

Her voice snapped me out of it. "Alright. Seriously, what's bothering you?" At my immediate denial, she put a hoof down. "Uh-uh. I can read you like a book, Echo, and you've got something big on your mind."

I lowered the chainmail hauberk across my shoulders. It bit and pinched around the edges, but it was something. However, it did not wear at me as much as the sinking feeling that had been present in my stomach for a while now. "I'm scared." I confided to her. "But not for myself. Actually, scratch that - I am scared for myself, but more so for the others."

I strapped on the shinguards and the pawguards next. "If I had stopped to think for just a moment, none of us would be here right now. We'd be..." I pointed out the window. "Out there, somewhere." The bicep covering went on as I paused to work. "Or at least, you, Disarray, and I. This whole situation is because of my presence here. I can't help but feel afraid for the others, and responsible for them. Coconut, and Ginger, as much of a grump as she is, are good ponies. So is everypony else here. They don't deserve what is about to happen."

"Even the mayor? The stallion who's been trying to kill you?" she asked skeptically.

"Even him. Or at least, he was a good pony." I wiggled my bulging forearms into the bracers and flexed them, half-savoring, half-hating the feeling of the metal pushing back against muscle. "I just didn't think I'd find this kind of thing here in Equestria."

Unbelievably, she began to laugh.

"Echo! Celestia's mane, dog! You are such a softie!" she said through a fit of giggling. "What did you think Equestria would be like when you imagined all of it? Some kind of wonderful utopia where ponies live and play all day and night, without a care in the world?"

Well...something like that.

Daring shook her head. "Firstly, Wethoof has been having hydra troubles for years, now. Even if you didn't show up, it was bound to come to this sometime. Secondly, this is not revolving around you. Everypony you see out there tonight is a volunteer, both from Wethoof and beyond. And they stand a good enough chance now that the reinforcements finally joined up. They might be able to pull this off without you. Hay, there's probably some unicorn that would have come here anyway that could fit in your hoofprints...er, pawprints...just fine! Granted, it'd be extremely hard, seeing as apparently you and Ginger are the only ones capable of really going all...fwoosh!"

I had to switch to using phonetics, here. "Fwoosh?"

She waved a hoof dismissively. "Fire. Heat. You know what I mean. Look. Maybe I'm not wording this right." She jumped up onto the bed and moved onto my side, standing straight and facing me with a serious expression. From her elevated position, she met my gaze evenly.

Through the reflection of her stunning magenta eyes, I could see the sun kiss the horizon.

"The only thing that you're truly responsible for is in here." She planted a hoof on my chest. "Nothing else matters but that. Following me, big guy?" I hesitantly nodded, frowning. "Things are going to happen that you wont have control over. Things that won't be your fault, but you'll get swept up in them, regardless of that. You need to make sure that you don't blame yourself for them. This is one of those times."

That...went against a great deal of what I had come to follow. I was a strict follower of the gentleman's code of honor. That code dictated it was my responsibility to see this through and take the blame for any consequences. It was my greatest strength, and my greatest weakness, both saving and damning me on many an occasion. (Old School: that's just how I roll.)

And I was just supposed to...let go of that?

"This is Equestria, Echo. Things have a way of happening, here." She chuckled a little bit. "Take it from a mare with experience. Promise me you won't try to take all that on your shoulders."

I glanced away, suddenly unwilling to meet her gaze.

A gentle, tannish-gold hoof on my cheek pushed my face back.

"Promise?" The sun burrowed into the ground in her eyes.

I slowly nodded.

"I promise."

And I was going to have to abide by it from now on. It's considered good manners to keep those, after all.

She smiled, and leaned forward, nuzzling the top of my head. I held absolutely still, and breathed in her scent: leaves, air, and the aroma of forgotten places. Intoxicating...

"You're a good dog, Echo, but you don't have to be a hero," she said softly.

...

"Now come on. I'll help you put on the rest of your armor. Don't want to be late."

"So, let me run through this, piece by piece. Yer the son of Princess Celestia. The Princess Celestia."

"Brilliant observation, Watson! Maybe it was the whole 'alicorn' thing that tipped you off, or maybe the mustache, or even - oh, I don't know - the fact that I've got the damned Royal Seal on my cloak." Disarray flashed the pin on his tye-dye garment. The image of two alicorns, Luna and Celestia, chasing each other around a globe, flashed in the last glimmers of sunlight.

I stepped out of the bedroom, now fully suited up, hood down. The others were sitting around the living room. Ginger was hunched over the kitchen table, brooding into a cup of ice water. Coconut and Disarray sat on a couch and a chair, respectively. Coconut had put on his own gear earlier.

The brown stallion continued, shaking off the taunt. "Yer also the son of Discord, the spirit of chaos and disharmony."

Crack!

Disarray shapeshifted into a draconequus and blew two small jets of smoke from his nostrils. "I wonder how long it took that one to sink in," he said moodily.

Coconut leaned back into the couch. "It's not that it's hard to believe, mate. The proof is right in front of me. Its...how the buck did they...ye know...buck?"

Ginger abruptly sprayed a cloud of liquid (now steaming hot) out of her mouth, while I tried to repress my imagination from running wild. It didn't work. Gods damn it, I didn't want to picture that!

Disarray cocked an eyebrow. "Well, when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much..." he sarcastically began.

"Ye know what I mean!"

"Well, I imagine they did it without much difficulty, considering I exist to tell you so." He wickedly grinned. "Rule thirty-four. No exceptions."

"If you elaborate on that, I'm going to seal you in a lamp," I warned him, sitting down next to Coconut.

"Well now I'm curious, mate. I don't think I can go without knowin' what that is," said the cook, cautiously eyeing the draconequus.

"Trust me on this one. There are terrible and wretched things that exist out there that you'd be better off without knowing about."

"Bwa-hahaa! There's probably already fan art of you bucking the hay out of one of the mares here," Disarray cackled, then suddenly grew somber. "Or me. Or Echo. Ugh..."

Rule thirty-four. No exceptions.

"What?" Coconut said in confusion.

"Oh, nothing..."

Daring emerged from the room, ready for her stay in the airship. Although not technically a citizen of Wethoof, she was considered a civilian, and would be spending the battle in safety, with a very small contingent of guards watching the airship. She began setting her things down at the door, next to our own supplies.

"Anyway, can I ask ye something, mate?" Coconut said.

"Well, considering you've been doing nothing but that, you might as well keep going."

"Why are ye here?"

Disarray twiddled the thumbs on his bear paws. "Beg pardon?"

"Like, why are ye runnin' around with Echo. Why are ye here in Wethoof?"

Crack!

The now-alicorn Disarray smiled. "Because, my little pony, it's not like I've anything better to do. Our good friend the diamond dog anticipates seeing the entirety of Equestria. Wouldn't you agree that that's something worth tagging along with? And besides," he mused. "Equestria has turned into a giant chessboard in my absence. Traveling around helps me...observe the game. And besides, I'm still trying to figure out whether or not I'm one of the players, or a piece. I advise all of you to do the same, before somepony decides to send you into play." he said cryptically.

Daring Do hopped onto the couch next to me. We lapsed into silence, then. As I watched, the sun slowly bled into the ground, the stars began twinkling into existence. Somewhere far away, Princess Luna was sending up the moon, giving the day a glorious sendoff. I felt like I was disgracing her in some way, by participating in this during her special time.

If there's one perk that I truly love the most about this land, it's not the ponies, or the magic, or the thrill of discovery. It's the dammed night sky. Every time you see it, the most you can do is simply sit back, gawp, and say: "Holy fucking tater-tots, that's beautiful." Not simply because it is, but because any attempt to describe it would never even come close, not in a million years. There would be no point, it would be wasted breath. I don't know what Luna got all uppity about back when she tried to overthrow her sister - I'd pick the night over the day every time.

For a while, there was peace, each of us thinking different thoughts. Five beings, each vastly different, and yet bound together by a joining (if obscure) cause.

As I sat and brooded about this, the sun finally set.

Ginger stood from the table and adjusted her barding. "It's time," she grunted.

Coconut went over to the door, grabbing his own spear and helmet. I followed, attaching my own weapon across my back. With luck, I wouldn't have to use it. I was terrible with the thing, after all.

Disarray gave us all a wink, stomped a hoof to the ground, and vanished in the blink of an eye. If he was playing a part in this, he'd show up when he was needed, and not a second sooner.

We filed out of the doorway and made our way into the streets. A trickle of townsponies were walking towards the grounded airships. We followed them as the last shreds of twilight faded into the west.

Approaching the ships, I could see how big they were. I'd never seen an airship close up, Equestrian or human, for that matter. The Mercy II and Mercy III, although considered small by the others, were each the size of the tavern, and that was just the ship part. The hollow envelopes containing whatever it was that made them float were enormous as well. Ponies would be packing the holds tight. I hoped they could get off the ground.

This was where we parted. "Good luck! Take care of yourselves!" Daring cried as she boarded the bound skycraft.

"We're going to need it..." Ginger whispered to herself, but my sensitive ears picked it up.

We continued past the airships to the gates. There, the army was assembled by the doors, which had been opened. With some pride and some embarrassment, I remembered the role I had in both destroying and rebuilding them.

A path opened up in the ranks. "I'll be on the northern earthworks with the captain," Coconut said. "Best of luck to the both of ya. We'll be waitin' to give 'em all kinds of hell once you bring them back." He gave us a wink and split off, melting into the sea of assembled soldiers.

Ginger and I strode through the aisle of steel and pony. As I padded beside her, I couldn't help but notice she was still wearing those goggles. At the very end of the way, we could see Captain Tythus, standing next to a chariot. Popper and Blueback, my two pegasi shadows, were harnessed to it. They would be our ride. Despite myself, I grinned beneath my hood. I'd never really traveled like this.

Tythus put out a hoof once we had reached him. "Hold here until I've finished," he instructed quietly. "You know what to do. I have faith in you, Ginger Snap and Echo the diamond dog. Do not let us down."

"Ponies!" he called out, striding forward as his horn began to softly glow, amplifying his voice.

Tythus uses the Royal Caps Lock? Ha! Wait till Disarray hears about this!

"Tonight we are gathered to perform our duty to the realm." he began. "There are many definitions of duty. Duty to one's family. Duty to one's leader. Duty to oneself. Tonight, we do none of those three. Tonight, we serve those innocents unable to serve themselves. Unable to save what they love from a force that no bribe of gold and no offer of friendship will halt. If we do not do our duty to these ponies, they, and everything they love, will be lost. And so, we are here to protect. To shield." Tythus began to slowly walk down the row as he spoke, occasionally pausing to gently look a pony in the eye. There was absolutely no other noise save his voice. "But we are also here for sacrifice. There is no denying what we are about to face makes me feel like a colt that just wet the bed." A low chuckling spread through the ranks. There were a few genuine smiles. "Ponies will die tonight. That, I can assure you.

"But I can also assure you that they will not meet their end in vain. Any time a shield is used, it takes a notch. Aye, we will lose a few brothers and sisters on this night. But better the loss of a few brave heroes than the countless lives of the innocents their deaths will protect. That's why you're here, why I'm here, why we're here."

He spun, and roared out into the masses, "We are here to turn back the tide of evil, not just from these ponies, but from all of Equestria! You remember your oaths, say them with me!"

The entire mass began to speak as one. I heard Ginger whispering the words next to me, reciting the oath she had taken when she had volunteered. I did not know this oath, as I had not been given a choice in the matter.

I closed my eyes for a moment, letting the words wash over me, thinking. My ear flicked. Ginger had stopped, letting in a sharp gasp of air. I opened an eye to see what was wrong, and started with absolute surprise.

Padding up the aisle beneath the full moon was Mosspaw, the last alpha of the Greenclaws.

He passed through Tythus as he moved, the captain seemingly unaware of the diamond dog's presence. Actually, none of the assembled even looked at him.

"What is this..." Ginger breathed, taking a step backwards.

Mosspaw came before us. He was the same size as me, but thick and well-muscled. Short, dark fur covered his body, a black vest around his shoulders, pockets filed with ghostly gems. The collar around his neck was studded with emeralds. His eyes, with pupils like black slits, were filled with an sharp expression of sadness. His face reminded me of a pit bull, but...vastly more intelligent.

Nopony saw anything. The oath continued, filling the warm night's air with the hum of a thousand voices speaking as one.

Mosspaw slowly extended a green-tinged paw, holding it out to Ginger. The mare flinched back instinctively, before the diamond dog gently laid three fingers on the side of her jaw, where the lines of her scar matched perfectly to his claws. Unlike Tythus, I could see her coat dimple at the pressure. Ginger's eyes were wide open in a bewildering mix of fear, wonder, and confusion.

He could touch us.

After a long moment, he lowered his paw and looked down, seemingly ashamed. Then, he moved to me. I held myself perfectly still, wary of what might happen. Instead of simply facing me, he walked about me in a circle, scrutinizing me with a solemn expression. I watched as he reached up and softly rested a finger on the very tip of the spear strapped to my back. He then moved to face me, as he did to Ginger.

Mosspaw reached up and traced the scar across my neck, much like I had done earlier in that day. Our eyes met. A surge of emotion flooded through me. In that instant, I felt the rush of the hunt, the pride of a leader watching his people thrive, the satisfaction of digging through stone with my packmates beside me.

I also felt the drive for more; more power, more prosperity, more everything. I felt the utter desolation of losing all of my loved ones, and the need to avenge their loss, and to move on and leave bad memories behind.

I understood now. I knew why Mosspaw had done what he did. He had tried to make a deal for a better world for his people, at the cost of something dear to him. He had forsaken a piece of his soul in the name of power, to use for the greater good. He had become a monster. A monster driven by good intentions, but a monster nevertheless.

For without shadow, there can be no light, a voice in my head murmured.

An invisible wind blew then, casing him to flicker and twist away, like nothing more than smoke. Tythus was now standing before us.

"Well?" he asked us impatiently. I had the feeling that we'd missed our cue. Awkward...

"...Oh! Um, right away, sir!" Ginger mumbled, snapping to her senses faster than I, dragging me into the chariot. "Let's go!"

Popper and Blueback extended their wings and pumped hard. The chariot floor lurched beneath me, sending me onto my haunches. We accelerated fast, and up, up into the darkness. The army dropped far beneath us as we were lifted high, high into the night. The two pegasi adusted their course. West, to where the full moon was rising over the distant forest canopy. West, to where the hydras lived.

"What...was that?" Ginger said quietly over the rush of wind. "Was that even real?"

I withdrew my spear and looked at the tip, feeling a cold chill creep over me.

A drop of blood slowly ran down the grooves in the metal from where Mosspaw had pressed his finger to it.

That was very, very real.

Ginger shivered, noticing the speck of crimson. I did the same.

It was going to be one hell of a night.

(20) [The Battle of Wethoof, Part I] All Dogs Go to Heaven

Stars.

For the first time in my life, they gave me no comfort. There was no solace to be found in the glittering dots of light that freckled the skin of the night sky. Luna's moon, round and bright, bathed the world in a silver gleam, hauntingly beautiful, yet distant. There was a fiercely alien beauty about Equestria that I had come to know and love, but tonight I could not appreciate it.

I had the distinct sensation that the stars had quieted from whatever conversations they held, and had turned their attentions towards the land. They were watching, now, holding a collective breath. The celestial audience had fallen silent and still.

I wrapped my toga closer to my body, and tightened the straps holding it flush. Despite the warmth of the previous day, and the presence of the typical rainforest thermals, the air was chilly tonight. And the pace by which we were traveling didn't help, either.

Beside me, Ginger Snap hunkered low to the floor of the chariot, pulling the black goggles over her eyes and adjusting the straps of her own apparel. The mare had fallen into a tense, brooding silence that I was more than happy to keep. Then again, I couldn't be much else than silent, now could I?

Hah! Mute jokes. I make myself laugh sometimes. Oh, wait...

Popper and Blueback, attached to the front of the chariot side-by-side, had not said a word either. I don't blame them. There is always too much to think about before a battle. Usually regrets. Loves undeclared, risks never taken, efforts wasted. That same old song and dance. What would you have done differently? What would you have done the same? The prospect of death has a habit of doing that to a man, regardless of his station.

The floor of the chariot tilted towards the forest floor. The pegasi spread their wings and banked into a glide. We were descending. Our destination appeared below, an enormous, ragged clearing, swampy and faded. The moonlight bleached the mud and murky water the color of bones. A massive willow tree dominated the very center of the swamp, with thin, dangling tendrils that whispered as the wind blew through them.

This was it. This was the hydra's nest. Somewhere in the swamp, they lurked. I could feel their presence; malevolent, primal, predatory. Were they watching us, too?

I mentally reviewed my mission, morbidly debating whether or not I'd be killed and eaten now or at the wall.

The plan was simple, as the best ones tend to be. We would first ignite everything we could. That would get the hydras' attention. Once they had been roused, we were to lead them through the forest to the gauntlet with a trail of fire. The unlit bonfire there would serve to keep them in place while the ponies opened up with the catapults and the airship bombarded them from above. And then, the charges should go off, annihilating the survivors completely. Our role was critical. Failure is not an option.

The chariot clipped the tip of a twig with a wheel. We were coming in for a landing.

With a soft thud, we landed on the outside of the swamp, rolling along the very edge of the forest. The sounds of the night life rose up to meet me. Crickets chirped, frogs peeped, and in the distance, an owl hooted. Nearby, a bubble of muck rose and popped, releasing a powerful, fetid odor that smelled peculiar mix of unwashed gym socks, really sloppy farts, and a generous helping of roadkill.

I wrinkled my nose in distaste as I hopped out of the cart before it stopped moving, landing on all fours and carving trenches into the peat as I ground to a halt. I stood upright and surveyed the swamp. My hackles stood on end. Something about this place was inherently wrong, much like the feeling I'd had in the Greenclaw den. This must be a hotspot for more of that corruption that'd been seeping up from Tartarus. Good thing we sealed up the main hole.

I heard the squelching noises of hooves landing in the mud somewhere behind me - Ginger had dismounted. "Go," she barked to our fliers, "be ready to lift us out of the gauntlet. We won't be long." The pegasi nodded and took a few running steps, before taking off once more and sailing away over the moonlit treetops.

I was once more observing the swamp when I felt something strike my back. I toppled over and rolled, claws out, ready to defend myself. Instead, I found myself staring into the fierce, scowling visage of Ginger, pinning me into the filth. Great. My toga had just been cleaned! I squirmed under her. She pressed down harder and leaned forward.

"What the buck was that back there?" Her voice was low, her eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Why is a dead diamond dog appearing to us? Why can we see him? I want answers, and I think you know something. So start. Talking." I bared my teeth at her and tried to rise. She planted hoof on my throat and shoved me back down. I instantly went limp, the pressure on that particular spot triggering a deep psychological terror in me. This was where my voice had been taken, where my life had almost bled out.

"I'm just as clueless as you are!" I managed to respond with a free claw. "I've never seen a ghost before in my life!"

"No. Ever since you've showed up, things have gone from bad, to worse, to outright freaky. And now, the dead rise! The dead, Echo!" she hissed. "You're connected to this somehow."

A figure loomed up behind her, tall and proud in the moonlight. A gust of wind rippled his coat, and his vest clinked softly as the gems in the pockets knocked together. As are you, kin-of-my-kin, came an eerily familiar voice that resounded in my mind rather than my ear.

At once, Ginger whirled off me and advanced upon the specter. "You," she hissed. "You're supposed to be dead! Go back to wherever it is you've come from. There is nothing for you here!"

I cannot - no place to call home I have. The caves of my sires reek with evil. Our spirits have no place there anymore. Mosspaw, the mighty leader of his pack, bent down to her level. You drank the river of shadow, and yet live on. You died and returned from the clutches of the blackwater. Behind them, I facepawed, finally recovering from the shock of Ginger's hoof and the appearance of a ghost. Of course! I should have known better than to drink from the Styx...but I hadn't known it for what it was. And you as well, pup. This is why I appear to you. His voice cut through my thoughts, making me shudder.

"Leave us alone," Ginger growled, taking another step forward, her horn bursting into flame. I winced. Even from my position on the ground, I could feel the heat. To his credit, Mosspaw didn't flinch, or even look away. "We have nothing to offer you."

You do. You may yet redeem us. I crawled to my paws, warily approaching Ginger's side. Mosspaw regarded me with interest, before looking back to her. An alpha is bound to his pack. When I lost myself to the blackwater, they suffered the same. They, as well as you and the Snap-ponies, suffer for my weakness.

"You...you're behind what's happened to my father? All this time!" Ginger seethed, bristling like a flame-colored hedgehog. "I'll kill you!" she roared, lunging forward, seeking to gore him through the eye. Mosspaw shimmered for a split second, and Ginger passed right through him.

Your strength is wasted. Save it, kin-of-my-kin. I am already dead. The diamond dog's glimmer went away as he turned to address the mare, who was standing behind him now, eyes wide in disbelief. We are in limbo, cannot pass on to the Long Hunt. We cannot move on.

Of course...that's always the reason the dead can never pass on. I should have seen that coming."What does your unfinished business have to do with Ginger and I? And why now, of all times?" I asked him in wonder. The little scientist inside me was squee'ing with delight as I observed the spirit perform a feat of selective permeability.

He looked at my words for a moment, then at me, with sadness in his eyes. I cannot read, he said.

"Echo wants to know how that could possibly have anything to do with us," Ginger spat, taking out her frustrations on the ground, stomping a deep hole into the muck. "And now? We have much bigger problems to deal with tonight than a few dead dogs who got themselves lost!"

You are the only living Greenclaws. Frostycorn, you, and the silent one here are all that is left. But further that number must be taken.

"WHAT?!" Ginger and I exclaimed at exactly the same time.

Sensing my confusion, he addressed me. You carry my spear. By rights, that puts you in contest to be alpha. Outsiders are allowed the challenge. You are technically a member of my pack, however distant your breed. He turned to Ginger. You are the pup of Frostycorn. You are a packmate by blood.

"...And my father?" Ginger asked.

He is my hunting-brother, having earned his place through living alongside us for many a year, and is now the alpha of our clan, or he would have been, had he taken up my fallen spear. It is our way. Mosspaw nodded sagely. The pack cannot go until an alpha rises. There must always be an alpha. This is known.

"And that means one of them has to die..." Ginger said slowly. She looked at me with hard eyes. I swallowed nervously.

No. Mosspaw stepped between us. Death is not part of this rite. He will not take up my spear. The pack will remain in limbo. For his defeat, I wish only. He paused, hesitant. But...there is one who would see him pass on to join us. For tonight, he passes beyond salvation. These hydras, and worse, are the spawn of his madness. The ice his heart had become has begun to crack.

"Who wants to kill my father?"

One who loves you both. Another voice sound into my mind. Soft and lilting, like the sound of a harp being plaid. A beautiful unicorn mare stepped out from behind Mosspaw, as if she had been hiding there all along. She had a gleaming ruby red coat and an twirling orange mane and tail. Fierce green eyes beheld us with warmth and pride.

Ginger made a choking gasp, and fell to her knees.

"M-mother..."

Disarray once again found himself perched at the roof of the world. Peering down from the heavens, the former Prince of Equestria repressed a shudder. Something was wrong. Something was brewing.

"But what?" he asked himself.

There was a presence in the air tonight. It felt alien, distant. Worse still, it felt hungry. Disarray thought back to his younger days, long ago, in hopes that they might reveal some forgotten answer to him. He strained his ears absently.

He started suddenly, and whirled around to the south-east. His ears were now at full attention, swiveling this way and that, like sonar dishes. There had been something, on the very edges of his hearing. There was no denying that. He focused once again, holding absolutely still.

There! It was a...buzzing.

Disarray felt his multi-millennial heart stutter in his chest. He knew that sound very, very well. He shifted his hooves.

The sound of wings once again sounded from behind him as their users alit on the cloud, some way behind him. He quickly spun about. "Cousins! We don't have much time!" he cried.

"Disarray? Why are you so upset...?"

"...The night is young and beautiful. Enjoy it. Truly, Aunt Luna outdoes herself."

"There's no time for that!" Disarray went to them. "Do you hear it? Towards the gap in the forest, far to where I face."

They turned, each wearing an identical frown. Their ears shivered as they concentrated, like he had done himself not moments before. Then, as one, their eyes widened in a look of horror and realization.

"The swarm approaches...!"

"...We must alert Celestia!"

"No time!" Disarray repeated. "We must deal with this ourselves." The others exchanged a nervous glance. "Oh, you've got to be kidding me. Are you two Scoota-I mean, chicken?"

They narrowed their eyes at him. "We have good reason to be..."

"...our foe has not been seen in many a generation. They could only have grown stronger."

Disarray sighed mightily, weighing his options. The presences of the swarm would certainly thrown things off down on the ground. Innocent ponies would very well perish if the threat were not dealt with. That could not happen. He might have forsaken his crown, but he was still compelled to watch over his former subjects.

So. It has come to this, he thought. They had already asked him for it once. There was little time for bartering now. "Stand with me and defend our subjects...and I will return to Canterlot to seek out my Mother, as you have wished of me." As much as it pained him to say, she deserved to see him again.

Still, it brought a smile to their faces. "We shall fly with you, cousin..."

"...For family, and for Equestria."

Two powerful downstrokes from each sent them into the air, gracefully hovering with barely any effort.

They twisted as one, and turned to the direction of the noise. Disarray coughed and frowned. "They shall come. And when they do, we shall be ready." Disarray scanned the skies. "Tell me, can you two do that...thing you do, down so close to the equator?" he asked them. They nodded solemnly, eyes fixed on the horizon. "Good. That will level the playing field for sure. I ask that you begin preparing for the attack. I have preparations of my own to begin."

The pair rocketed away into the heavens, where they would begin focusing their energy. With skill, and a little luck, they would be able to halt the advance. To turn the tide, however, Disarray would have to resort to drastic measures.

Disarray tugged at his mustache. "The things I do for love," he mused. Then, he grimaced as he concentrated his magical power, a band of light slowly tracing the spiraling lines of his horn. The former prince groaned with the effort; it'd been a long time since he'd done this. When the light reached the very tip, it condensed, before racing back down his horn and into his head, passing down his neck and settling in his chest, where it burned like a miniature sun.

Disarray repressed a groan of pain as he felt the spell take hold. Deep, deep inside him, the magic began to take hold of his essence, and pull. He felt it begin to concentrate in two spaces, each the opposite of the other. And then, the hybrid was split down the middle, a sharp blast of energy pouring fourth from the gap.

He ceased to exist at that moment.

Crack!

Two forms now stood face to face on the cloud.

A pale gray alicorn, with a straight, white mane, clad in a thick, multi-colored robe, stomped his hoof. "Let us be frank with each other," he said to the second figure. "For tonight is no time for petty squabbling. We must be two, but work as one, if we are to see our subjects through this. The spell will wear off soon."

His counterpart, a draconequus, with a purple dragon's head, feathered spine, two white bear-arms, two lobster claws, an ostrich leg, a lion's paw, and a kangaroo tail, stood at ease. "Oh, I concur. But I have to ask - isn't talking to oneself considered a sign of insanity?" he asked coyly. "Also, who gets to keep the name this time around? I think I should, because you had it last time."

"Fine...Disarray."

Disarray snorted with amusement. "Don't be such a stick in the mud...Entropy.

The only features the two had in common were their eyes, one pair glittering with mischief and humor, the other's with calm and focus, and each sported a glimmering, rainbow mustache, which shifted in a non-existent wind.

Entropy growled in response. At this, Disarray held up two bear-paws in a gesture of peace. "Oh, hush, Mister Crankyhoof. I may be our embodiment of chaos, but I could never let harm come to those I care for. After all, even Father never killed innocents, and protected his subjects from all but himself. We will smite our foes with with zest! With vigor! With righteousness! With chocolate milk!" He clacked his lobster claws once, and a massive warhammer appeared in them, which he rested jauntily over one shoulder. "And with the Banhammer. Can't go wrong with the Banhammer!"

Entropy rolled his eyes. It was going to be a long night.

Daring Do shuddered to herself as she felt her hooves press into the wooden planks of the floor, the rising of the ship making her feel heavy. The airship's dark hold was somewhat drafty, despite the ponies packed into it, and the sensation of flying by anything other than her own wings made her feel uneasy.

The Mercy II was moored to the barracks by a long rope, and tethered to her sister ship, the Mercy III. Those who could not fit into the first were berthed into the second. A skeleton crew tended to each. They had instructed the civilians to stay down below. This didn't rest well with Daring Do, however. She was beginning to crave the outside, where there was room to spread her wings and sky over her head.

The instructions hadn't seemed to stop the mayor, though. As soon as the ships had started to rise, the stallion had gone abovedecks.

"If he can do it, what's stopping me?" Daring muttered to herself. The answer, of course, was nothing. To that end, the explorer pressed her way through the crowd of ponies, and began climbing the stairs. Nopony bothered her - they were too busy with each other, huddled together in groups as they murmured soft words to frightened foals.

The hatch to the deck wouldn't open at first, but soon yielded to a solid buck, and was promptly blown open by a roaring gust of icy wind, the likes of which Daring hadn't felt since her expedition into the Himallamas, the highest mountains in Equestia. She stuck her head out, and gasped at what she saw.

The ships were surrounded by a bellowing, seething whiteout.

The deck was coated in a thick cloak of snow. The wind howled mercilessly, stinging her cheek with sleet and tiny hail. A nearby crew member was completely encased in a block of ice. The look on his face bordered utter astonishment. "What the buck...?" Daring asked nopony in particular. She hopped out of the hatchway and landed on the slippery deck. She could see that a similar fate had fallen the Mercy III. "What's going on here?"

A shape moved across the sister ship's deck. Daring felt her blood run colder than the ice beneath her hooves as she recognized it. The figure turned and grinned at her, revealing row after row of shark-like teeth nestled inside its great, blue muzzle. A long prehensile tail, ending in a paw, dropped the frozen crew member it had been dragging. The golden collar about its neck was scuffed, beaten, and now embedded with a great, black gem that seemed to absorb all light that touched it. The two snow leopards padding across the deck beside it hissed at her, hackles arisen. She could recognize that figure from anywhere - it had been plaguing her for years, after all. "No...that's not possible!" she whispered. The explorer twisted round and swiftly brought out her trusty whip. She was going to need it.

When she turned, a streak of cloud spun off from the storm and swirled about in front of her, swiftly coalescing, condensing, gaining shape and form...the form of a pony. Two ice-blue eyes, coldly lit from within, opened in the figure's head.

Daring repressed the urge to panic. Years of experience were the only thing that prevented her from hurling herself into the air and attempting to brave the howling wall of hail and sleet. She whirled around. The hold was still safe! But the hatchway suddenly blew back down, and was rapidly covered in a sheet of thick ice, moving as if it was alive.

The pony finished forming.

"For the greater good," said Mayor Frost Snap, as his horn lit up a sickly white.

Coconut grunted as he heaved the last boulder into the catapult's ammunition slot. "Yer all good ta go, lass! Best of luck to ye!"

Sparky laughed and gave him a chipper (yet twitchy) wave from where she was perched on the siege engine as the pegasi team shoved the last of the cloud-borne catapults away from the earthworks. Other ponies, mostly pegasi, manned the weapons, with a smattering of strong earth ponies and unicorns, each equally cloud-proofed. Silent as a feather hitting the floor, the ponderous construction drifted into place by the others, ringing the gauntlet like a grim assembly of judges, ready and waiting to bring their collective justice down upon the damned. The superdense clouds they rested upon occasionally released a small crack of lightning, such was their sensitivity.

Coconut rolled his shoulders. Silence had fallen over the gauntlet now. Beside him, Captain Tythus stood as still and implacable as a granite mountain. Other soldiers were spread out over the embankments, four deep, and over three-hundred abreast. On the southern wall, Sargent Baritone gave the all-clear signal. Atop the eastern wall, Sergeant Cloud Nine repeated it. As the final catapult assumed its position, Sergeant Sparky completed the trio's gesture.

They were ready.

Pennants fluttered in the breeze. In the sky, ragged patches of white chased each other through the stars. Coconut forlornly gazed at them. The clouds looked like they were fleeing. That sounded like a good idea right about now. He wasn't a fighter. He was a cook, for Celestia's sake!

But he knew what he'd signed up for. He watched as the two airships containing the town's population began to slowly rise, tethered to the barracks on the other side of the wooden wall. Coconut turned his gaze west, the distant treeline. That's where they would come from. He shivered, and it wasn't from a sudden gust of wind.

"Frightened?" Tythus' voice was surprisingly tender for once. The captain, while usually soft-spoken, usually carried a certain bite to his words that made ponies listen.

Coconut hesitantly nodded.

"'You may fear the end and whisper goodbyes, but know that all pass to run the same skies,'" the captain said.

Coconut's ears pricked up. "Where'd ye pick that up, sir?"

Tythus cracked a warm smile that spoke of a golden age and happy memories. "An old friend...one I believe I'd given up all hope of ever seeing again. If fate sees me through this" Then, he turned back into a statue, as hard and expressionless as a chunk of marble.

"How?" Ginger wailed. "Why? You shouldn't be here. You don't belong with them!" She had finally given into her to her shock and grief, still collapsed on the ground, great sobs wracking her body.

The beautiful mare bent down and nuzzled her daughter gently, brushing away a stream of tears. I am one of them, Ginger. Your father brought his family into the clan. Because of him, I cannot move on, and neither can you or the silent one, should the worst occur.

The ghost of Mosspaw and I stood a few yards away, solemnly watching the scene. I wanted to help her, to swallow up the poor mare in my arms and tell her everything would be all right. But you can't help everyone all the time. Sometimes, they need to help themselves.

This was one of those times.

"I...can't! This isn't..." the younger mare gasped, fighting back another wave of sobbing.

Frost is a good pony. But if he is allowed down the path he has chosen, many more innocents will pay for it. The specter's voice was but a whisper in my mind. I fear he has already begun his plan. The silent one's companion is in grave danger, as well as lives of the townsponies The hydras, while a terrible threat, are not your real foes tonight.

My...companion? And the civilians? But they were all on the ships...with...oh no. Oh, no. No. NO. NO. HE WILL NOT TOUCH A SINGLE HAIR ON HER HEAD!

I felt an almighty rush of heat well up from my chest. My hackles, already risen from the atmosphere of the swamp, stiffened to such a degree that they pushed up the armor from my back. My breaths deepened greatly, until I felt like I was growling with every exhalation. My claws sank in and out of the mud as I instinctively kneaded the ground. Something happened to my eyes, a sharpening of vision, of focus. The surge of heat in my guts threatened to boil over to my mind, but I firmly smashed the wave of anger against a wall of cold calculation.

I don't get angry. I get even.

"But...everypony's counting on us! We swore an oath!" Ginger said as she shuddered, successfully bracing against yet another surge of emotion.

"We'll take care of the hydras. But we aren't stopping at the gauntlet. We're going to put him down." My cold fury seemed to lend my characters a stark luminescence. I looked at the swamp and snarled, my fingers flexing tightly into fists.

The silent one has heart, Mosspaw observed. He will make good alpha.

I strongly doubted that. I had no desire to lead a pack. I wanted nothing more than to see the world, but it seemed that the world had other plans for me. Regardless, if I must lead, I will not lead the Greenclaws. A new pack will take their place. If I must lead, it will be on my own terms.

You must do this, Ginger. Both of you must stand and atone for his sins. You give us hope, my love... the mother's voice drifted off as she began to fade away from existence.

"No! Come back!" Ginger cried, trying to wrap the figure in her grip. For the briefest of an instant, she encountered resistance, then passed through the wisp, landing in a heap in the mud. She lay still, ragged breaths shaking her entire body.

I approached her and knelt beside her, reaching out a tentative paw. In a blur of motion, she sprang up, radiating with heat and fire, her mane flickering and dancing like flames.

Ginger let out a long, wordless yell, and shoved past me to the edge of the swamp, where she arched her back, magic crackling along her body, before releasing a terrible emerald blaze of heat from her horn. The wave of fire issued forth in such a powerful gout that it made a flamethrower look like a candlestick in comparison.

This was more like standing next to a fighter-jet engine.

On full throttle.

Unbelievably, the reeds and grasses were almost incinerated in the hellish assault, and the only thing that completely withstood the tide was the solitary willow tree, it's weeping branches lighting up and shining like a twisted reflection of a Christmas tree. The fire spread quickly, and Ginger didn't let up on her magic; the stream of energy was constant, and if anything, increasing.

She stopped only when four monolithic towers of muck and filth broke the surface, each capped with a bellowing, roaring hyrda head, and that was only to take a deep breath from her cry and to adjust her aim, shifting her blaze straight into the gullet of one of Big Momma's mouths. The hydra matriarch shouted her defiance to the stars, and they seemed to shake and shiver with fear.

Behind the first, many smaller hydras burst forth from the charred swamp, each the size of three-ponies end-to-end, shrieking and hissing and slithering towards her.

By the tree, four other monolithic heads surfaced, letting loose an ear-jarring bellow that may have deafened every living creature in a half-mile radius. This was Big Daddy, the patriarch of the hydra nest.

I wolfishly grinned and ignited the claws on my left paw, smoothly withdrawing Mosspaw's spear - no, my spear - from its holder with the other.

The pack runs with you on this night, silent one, said Mosspaw. From the treeline, other shapes emerged, shadowy and ethereal, but their forms were recognizable as they slunk from the darkness. There were elders and pups, males and females, nursing mothers clutching babes and proud fathers standing by them. One last hunt to lead us on, before the final rest.

I spoke, then.

Not with my claws, but with my throat. The tattered vocal chords strained and shivered, filling me with a sharp pain. The words were softer than a whisper, but their meaning was greater than anything I'd ever said in my life. Five simple words, that realized a deep truth within me that I had been unaware of until this moment.

"I already have a pack."

And then, bursting with feral strength, I charged forward.

"Here they come," stated Entropy.

And come they did. The southeastern sky was flecked with black dots, the air pulsing with the humming drone of a thousand beating wings. The changeling swarm. Unseen for generations. Until now - why?

"Have I ever told myself how much I hate changelings before? Because I do. I really, really do. Oh! Idea! I'll keep score!" said Disarray, as he disinterestedly scratched his scalp, flicking away a wayward scale, which caused the surrounding cloud it landed on to erupt with colorful flowers.

"That's barbaric."

"No, that's fun."

Entropy snorted with irritation, giving his wings a testing flex as he glanced upwards into the heavens, where his cousins were nearly done preparing. "Whatever. I can't believe I'm arguing with myself."

"And losing, at that. I truly am a lost cause." Disarray casually spun Banhammer around, easily gripping it with all four limbs.

They fell silent as the swarm gathered on the horizon. It wouldn't be long, now. All that was left was to wait for the signal.

Disarray cast a glance downward. "Well, well, well. It would seem he's finally made his move," he said, pointing downwards to the town. Entropy followed his claw, and saw a whirling ball of grey and white where the two airships had once been. Snow and hail fell from the roiling mass, as well as an occasional rumble of thunder. "I can hold the fort up here, yes? Oh, who am I kidding. I know I can." He made a dramatic pose. "I must go! My people need me."

With a crack and a puff of red smoke that smelled suspiciously like hot sauce, the draconequus vanished.

Entropy sighed and turned his gaze upwards. He didn't have long to wait. The sky abruptly burst into life; long, wavy bands of light playing across the stars and moon, stretching from horizon to horizon. The lights twisted and whipped across the sky in complex, snakelike motions, green and blue and red and yellow all competing in a riot of color and energy.

The aurora had come to the rainforest.

Entropy spread his wings and took off into the night. The swarm was closer now, he could almost make out the individual figures. He gritted his teeth and focused his magic, determined to meet them with force.

One of the aurora whiplashed out of the sky, colliding heavily with the oncoming tide, knocking some away like leaves in the wind, completely vaporizing others. But there were too many to count, and the strike barely seemed to dent their numbers.

The alicorn accelerated to high speed, his magic aglow, cloak spilling out behind him like a rainbow. He bellowed his defiance into the night, "FOR EQUESTRIA!" and lowered his horn like a lance. At the tip, a small cone of air formed as he went faster still, strong wings pumping furiously.

Two more shapes rocketed out of the sky and took position on either side, aurora trailing behind them in a ghostly wake. As one, they hit the wave like a sledgehammer, tearing deep into the swarm. Entropy shuddered as he knocked changeling after changeling out of the sky, buffeting some with his wings, and impaling a few with his horn. He closed one eye as their strange blue blood gripped down his face.

He could hear the shrieks and insect-like cries as the swarm moved around him, like a school of fish. One attempted to slow his charge, and he responded by taking the creature through the neck with his horn, severing head from body almost completely.

And then, the three were clear, passing into clear skies on the other side. All were covered in bits of chitinous shell and fragments. "Another pass!" roared Entropy. Again, they wheeled about and began to accelerate

Another tentacle of aurora tore down from the heavens and obliterated almost two-dozen in one hit. Entropy braced himself and fired spell after spell into their midst - it was nigh impossible to miss, one simply had to aim in their general direction, and hitting something was all but guaranteed.

The swarm continued on..

Hopefully my other half is having a better time, Entropy thought grimly as the trio re-entered the fray.

Daring Do sprang backwards as she nimbly dodged another lance of ice. Thank Celestia her wing had healed, otherwise she'd have been struck long ago.

She retaliated with a well-placed crack of her whip, but the mayor dissolved into a cloud of icy smoke and avoided the impact. Daring flapped hard, propelling herself into a dizzying spin and barely avoided the retaliatory barrage.

The deck was slippery beneath her hooves, so she had tried to keep to the air. So far, that seemed to be working. Frost was unable to hit her with his icicles as long as she kept moving. But she could only do this for so long, and the mayor pursued her across the ship like a force of nature, unrelenting in the slightest.

And on the sister ship, the source of her nightmares calmly sat and watched. That was the worst part, she reflected, that unnerving stare with those evil, calculating eyes.

A splinter of ice tore off a primary feather. Daring grunted with pain and zipped under its brother and skimmed the deck. Frost solidified in front of her, but Daring was ready. She cracked her whip, and vaulted to the side when his spell fired. Planting her hooves on the icy paneling, she pivoted and bucked him with all her might, catching him on the shoulder as he stepped to avoid the whip. The blow sent him reeling, but before she could press forward, he dissolved and was whisked away by the wind.

"Ponyfeathers!" Daring cursed as she watched him reform by the helm. "How am I supposed to keep this up? I can't do anything to him. If I try and fly, he'll just shoot me down once I tire!"

"Might I suggest that you do a barrel roll?" came a voice to her side. Daring spun to see Disarray in his draconequus form, nonchalantly leaning on a massive hammer. "Problem?" he asked her with an almost malicious grin.

"Help!" she cried as the mayor unleashed another barrage from his elevated position.

"Say 'please'," said Disarray, calmly swatting away few a wayward spikes with a lobster claw.

"Please!" Daring screamed, as she felt another pass across the back of her neck as she looped. Too close!

"Now say, 'Please, with a cherry on top.' And sprinkles. I like sprinkles!"

"DISARRAY!"

The draconequus pouted. "Humph! Everypony's a critic." He vanished with a puff of spicy-smelling smoke.

Daring's heart plummeted. With him gone, she was as good as gone. Another hail of ice came her way. She twisted and evaded by the skin of her teeth. Frost's aim was drastically improving.

The mayor dissolved yet again and re-formed not two paces behind her. Daring screeched as he lunged forward, his horn tearing through the meat of her wing, near the base, and she toppled to the deck in an ungainly heap of feathers. No! It's all over now... was her only thought.

Daring rolled over and staggered to her hooves. Without her wings, she was nowhere near fast enough to get out of the way now, but she was determined to meet her fate head on.

Frost Snap loomed over her, eyes aglow with the light of insanity and magic. A cold frown was etched onto his muzzle. "Now you will see what I lost," he murmured almost gently. His horn lit up. Daring winced and closed her eyes-

-A thunderous crash split the air. Daring opened her eyes, and her jaw dropped.

Disarray stood before her, two arms carrying a large dome of glass, plugged with a slab of wood. Inside the half-sphere, Mayor Frost Snap blinked in confusion, tapping the surface with a horn. Disarray shook the thing violently, and the mayor tumbled about inside as snow mysteriously began to fall around him. He slammed the thing onto the deck and planted one ostrich leg atop it, while Frost tried to escape by turning into a cloud again, but was held back by the glass.

"Snowglobe!" he proudly announced.

Inside, the mayor raged and shouted, but the prison muted him. His horn lit up again, and inside of the glass was rapidly coated with thick, concealing ice.

Disarray stepped off, eyeing it cautiously. "Clever. Can't see what he's up to now. You have to give him credit; the guy may be crazy, but he isn't stupid." He hefted the massive hammer up. "Hey, Frost Snap!" A air of sunglasses appeared on across his dragon muzzle. "I think it's time for you to...chill out!" He brought the hammer down heavily, shattering the snowglobe and the ice beneath it like it was made of wet paper.

It was empty, the only hint that something had ever been in there was a hole cut through the bottom and the decking below.

"Ha-ha! And I was worried for a second that he'd make it easy!" said Disarray gleefully.

Daring Do shook her head as she caught her breath, her wing twinging painfully. "The mayor isn't the real threat. Look over on the other ship." She cringed as she dug up a pile of ice and pressed it to the wound. Her mane blew into her face as the wailing storm continued around the tethered airships.

Disarray looked. "Him? I thought he was dead. Ugh. Why do they never stay dead. Why?"

"Dramatic tension," she dryly quoted him.

"I see what you did there." He smirked, but that was wiped off his face as a cold mist began to rise out of the floorboards in front of them, rapidly compacting into the form of a very pissed-off Frost Snap.

They both scrambled to the side as a wall of hail shot towards them.

A soft rumbling in the distance preceded the hydras long before Coconut could see them. When at last the cry came up, he squinted to find them. The two giants, Big Momma and Big Daddy, appeared to be like small moving groves of trees, their necks towering high above the distant canopy as they trumpeted and bellowed with rage and hunger.

"Here they come!" cried a guard to his left. Who he was, Coconut didn't know.

Two pinpricks of light appeared at the treeline, one purplish-pink, the other a bright green. Like a pair of stars, they raced across the open ground. Echo and Ginger, thought Coconut. The wall of slithering blackness that sped after them had to have been the entire nest.

The stars drew closer. Coconut could make out the trail of fire each left in their wake as they sprinted side by side to their goal, the massive mountain of debris in the middle of the gauntlet, soaked with oils and dried moss so that it might catch easier.

Halfway to their goal, the sky erupted into life.

Great swaths of streaking colors painted the night in a swirling dance of lights and brilliance. From east to west, north to south, the entire starlit sky was awash with beauty. Coconut was stunned - he had never seen anything like it before, he had no name for the phenomenon.

"The aurora?" Tythus gasped, giving the glory a word. "The Lights are here? But...why?" He spun towards the town and growled deep in his throat. Coconut followed his gaze and almost fainted on the spot.

A great swirling ball of clouds now obscured the airships, where the townsponies were supposed to be kept safe.

"Captain, what's goin' on up there?" he asked, his voice no more than a whisper.

"The mayor has happened." Tythus spun back around. "Cloud Nine! Get down here on the double! Send a score of your best fliers up to the ships and stop whatever's going on up there before it gets out of hoof!" he roared to the eastern wall.

Coconut saw a flurry of activity up there, before a group of pegasi shot up and powered away to the maelstrom. One of them streaked towards him. Cloud Nine pulled up in a flurry of feathers, screeching to a halt a few feet away from the embankments, hovering as the captain addressed her.

"Get Coconut to the barracks," he told her. "Coconut, I need you to release everything you see in the holding cells. Tell them that 'Winter is here.' Do you understand?" Coconut hastily nodded. So he wasn't going to be on the walls when the hydras got here? That wasn't so bad.

Cloud Nine pivoted and swooped over him, looping her forelegs around his gut. "Let's move!" she said. Coconut stammered something in reply. His brain sank to his stomach as she sped away from the wall, watching as the ground shrank and the ponies became ants.

They passed over the eastern wall, bristling with spears and armor and projectiles. Coconut moaned and closed his eyes. Flying did not agree with him.

Whether it was two minutes or two hours later, he felt solid ground beneath his hooves. The pegasus released him and flew off, straight up.

Coconut looked around. He was at the barracks now, completely deserted. The long, tough rope holding the violent ball of cloud above was tethered around the belltower. From here, he could hear the sound of the intense winds and soft cracks of thunder that the storm kept up.

Gathering his courage, he galloped through the doors. The main hall was eerily quiet, and his hooves echoed loudly in the empty space. He turned into he dormitory wing. The cells were at the end of the hall, the room to the left of Tythus' office.

He threw open the door and looked around. There were two large cages here, in a room that was about the size of the kitchen. They were almost full to bursting with the pirates from before. Coconut could see their leader, that big gryphon, perk up as he entered.

"Well, whaddaya know, boys! Looks like we're getting paid after all!" Griffin the gryphon announced.

"Winter's here," Coconut panted. "The captain...told me...ta tell ye..."

"I know what he told you. He wouldn't have sent you otherwise. See that sword hanging on the wall? Give it here and stand back, colt." The pirate stood tall and stretched his wings. His eyes flashed.

Coconut looked to see his massive black broadsword hanging on a peg. "How do I know ye ain't just gonna try and run off?"

"Because your captain gave me an offer I couldn't refuse." The gryphon grinned unpleasantly. "Plus, he's paying triple what the mayor offered."

That would have to be good enough. Orders were orders, after all. Coconut gripped the sword with his mouth and took it down, struggling with its weight, before passing it through the bars. The gryphon hefted it easily and cried, "Hiiiiiyah!" before swinging it in a deadly arc, the glimmer black blade singing as it cut through the bars. "Let's go, gents! We've got some booty to earn tonight!"

The pirates roared in agreement and surged out of the cells. One of them, a scraggly female gryphon, picked him up in her talons. They sped through the barracks and burst back out of the doorway that he'd come through not moments before. Coconut resisted the urge to heave as they took flight, the pegasi and gryphons that made up the crew carrying the few land-based members in a manner similar to his own.

They whirled around the building, and split into two groups. Coconut could see Griffin roaring out orders like a madpony. The group he was flying in swooped off towards the west, towards the gauntlet, while other began to ascend towards the maelstrom above, silhouetted by the magnificent aurora in the skies.

"Hoooargh...think I'm gonna... hurl..." Coconut moaned piteously as they bore him back to the battle. They cleared the wall just in time to see the battle begin.

The pyre had been lit, purple-pink flames competing with brilliant emerald green ones. Coconut could just barely make out the two figures of Echo and Ginger as they scrambled aboard an awaiting chariot by the blaze.

The hydras rushed through the gap, a great wave of scales and teeth and lashing necks.

Slowly, ponderously, the six great catapults began to fire, their swinging arms steadily increasing speed until their payload became nothing more than a blur, before it was launched into the air with deadly force. Coconut shuddered, almost feeling sorry for the hydras. The boulders they were flinging had been double his size, and he was considered a big pony. The rocks arced high through the air, lazily, slowly as if they were moving through water.

An enormous shadow descended over the field as the Benvolent Mercy moved to attack.

She descended from where she had been circling, so large that she blocked out the light of the stars and the moon and the mysterious aurora. There was a terrible pause, and then her guns roared as one. Coconut could feel his teeth rattle in his skull as the broadside was unleashed.

KRACKA-BOOOOOOOOOMMMM!

Author: I've divided the entire battle into two chapters, because the entire thing was pushing 15k words. The next one's more or less already written, though, so it won't be long! I have a surprise in store for you...let's just say someone you'd never expect makes an appearance.

(21) [The Battle of Wethoof, Part II] Of Fire, Ice, and Diamond

KRACKA-BOOOOOOOOOMMMM!

My eardrums almost exploded from the sheer noise of the barrage. Popper and Blueback just barely cleared the gauntlet in time as Ginger and I collapsed in the back of the chariot, exhausted from our harrowing sprint. Breathing hard, I peered over the edge to watch the results.

All the weapons struck hit in one overpowering barrage, tearing into the hydras with frightening effectiveness. I saw a juvenile completely squashed flat from a boulder, and several more were sent flying through the air as the ground was cratered beneath their claws. Big Daddy bellowed in anger, a gaping hole now visible in his shoulder where the Mercy's cannons had struck home.

They stampeded to the inferno Ginger and I had ignited, blindly drawn to it like moths to a bug-zapper, with similar results. The catapults reloaded and fired, sending another hail of rocks crashing down among their midst, the shrieks and squeals of pain and death making my ears lie flat.

I saw Captain Tythus on the earthworks - the golden unicorn was unmistakable as he charged what seemed to be a mighty spell. The air crackled around him, and then he stabbed his horn into the sky, where a bolt of gold streaked towards the gap between the two dirt walls and pulsed, forming a massive magical barrier several feet thick and many yards high, almost a mirror image of the wooden behemoth on the other end of the field.

Only then did the hydras seem to realize they had been trapped.

They scattered, the smaller attempting to scale the earthworks, where they were met by avalanches of mud and stone and spears. Still, some managed to summit the hills, were they fiercely fought tooth and nail with the guards. The two leviathan parents simply charged the main wall. They hit it with such force that I saw some of the dead rainforest giants splinter in half, the ponies on the wall almost thrown off from the blow.

KRACKA-BOOOOOOOOOMMMM!

Another sizzling crash filled the air as the Mercy unloaded a second punishing salvo. The battlefield erupted with bursts of red and brown. Big Daddy took another direct hit, one of his necks holed right through the middle and going limp, tripping up his tree-trunk legs. Big Momma roared in anger at this, and proceeded to head-butt the top of the wall, sending ponies flying from its towering heights.

The chariot began to circle the battlefield, aiming to land on the northern earthworks. "No!" Ginger wheezed to our pegasi. "To the ships! The ships!" The chariot lurched violently as they swung about and powered upwards, aiming back towards Wethoof, away from the carnage unfolding below.

The sight of where the ships used to be filled me with dread. Frost Snap had to have been behind that swirling ball of storm. Nopony else was capable of such magic, except maybe Ginger.

Popper and Blueback took us higher and higher. We passed the level of the airships, but we were still some ways off. "Hey! What's going on?" Ginger had to shout over the rush of wind. They ignored us. What the hell?

I glanced up at the pulsing sky. Why was it filled with the northern lights? I squinted hard. There, still high above, was another ball of activity, this one made up of a great multitude of small black specks. Every few seconds, a small burst of light would go off in their midst, accompanied by a sharp crack. Abruptly, one of the waves of light stretched down from the stars and smashed right through it, sending a great many of them flying. I clenched the side of the chariot in apprehension. Something was controlling the aurora! I hoped it was on our side.

"Popper! Blueback! Answer me!" Ginger roared. Nothing. They only seemed spurned on by this, pumping us up higher still. We were passing the second ball now. I looked down. We were very, very high up. "What the buck are you doing!?" Ginger was screaming now, a twinge of fear. I didn't blame her.

A terrible thunderclap split the sky. I looked around in panic for signs of an explosion, before it hit me. That had come from below. I gazed down, back at the distant battlefield. Three great mushroom clouds had arisen from the center of the gauntlet, and I could see a shock-wave traveling across the land in all directions as the fireworks went off, such was the force of the detonation. The effects were lost to me though, as the great clouds of smoke obscured the field.

KRACKA-BOOOOOOOOOMMMM!

Apparently there had been survivors. Not for long.

We had reached what seemed to be the apex of our flight now, and the pegasi leveled out. Popper turned his head back towards us and leered. I stared in shock. Mainly because his neck had twisted one-hundred-and-eighty degrees. His eyes flashed as they warped into a reflective blue, and both pegasi were surrounded in a similar colored aura for a few seconds before revealing what had formerly been ponies. Black, chitinous shells, insecticidal wings, pointy fangs, crooked horns, swiss-cheese legs...

Changelings! Fuck!

"Changelings!" Ginger gasped. "Buck!"

My thoughts exactly.

The one that had formerly been Popper hissed at us, and on some unknown signal, the pair spun over, sending the wagon upside-down. Reacting on pure instinct, I managed to snag a claw on the side, dangling almost a thousand feet in the air as the wind whipped around me, blowing my hood off. Ginger wasn't so lucky, and fell silently away, looking up at me stupidly, as if she couldn't believe what was happening.

The changelings hissed and made weird, chattering noises. The Blueback-changeling smiled at me, showing a mouthfull of needle-like teeth. "Time to fly, diamond dog!" it cackled.

While Daring's in trouble? I don't think so. But he was right. I couldn't fly.

"It's called falling with style," I retorted, before the section of wood I had snagged was wrenched out of the chariot by another gust of wind.

I gave them the finger...

...And then dropped like a rock.

My body's instincts were useless up here. I was a creature of the earth, not the sky. As I fell, claws still locked into the plank of wood, my very human brain realized this and seized the moment, like the opportunistic creatures we are. A complex firing of chemicals deep inside that blob of pink matter sent an electric signal rocketing faster than the speed of sound down the superhighway of nerves called my spinal cord, where it alerted the adrenaline glands it was time to get off their lazy asses and work, thank you very much. The twin organs pumped a hot dose of stimulants directly into the bloodstream, where it raced into the heart, which immediately started jackhammering away with such force that my vision pulsed in time. The increased blood flow finally back surged into the brain, carrying the supercharged payload along for the ride. The brain's response was profound. The insights it revealed to me in this state were even more so. A simple glance downwards provided me with a rough estimate of the distance I had to go. Approximately 1,975 feet until instant death. Excellent! Ginger was somewhere in between 1800 and 1650 feet, and was rapidly approaching terminal velocity. I quickly deduced that it would be possible to reach her if I managed to accelerate to that speed before she did and maintain it by using the standard formula for gravitational pull on Earth (9.8 meters per second, squared, simpletons!) and simultaneously calculating an estimate of her own rate of descent. Once I reach her, I should have enough time to attempt to launch her back into the sky. As we were both falling, that would result in my own speed increasing, (every action has an opposite and equal reaction, philistines!) while, with the superior strength I now possessed, I might be able to slow Ginger's descent enough to make the fall survivable.

In neanderthal's terms: "Brain say fall faster. Throw Ginger up. Also, need bacon. Bacon good."

That entire process took exactly 1.43 seconds. I adjusted my calculations accordingly.

I shook off the plank and slimmed out, diving towards the ground like a furry torpedo. The reduced drag allowed me to cut through the air like a knife, and I almost felt my stomach sink with the acceleration, despite being upside down. For an instant, I realized how peculiar it was that for a species that was supposed to be landlocked most of the time, I spent a great deal of mine in free-fall.

There she was! Ginger was falling face-up, looking at the sky with a blank expression on her face. She was completely limp, as if she had given up. Was I seeing that peculiar moment where one's life flashes before one's eyes? If so, I was sorry I was about to interrupt it.

I closed the distance quickly, holding out a paw for reach. We were approaching that swarm of black specks now. From the glinting of the aurora off of what seemed to be dark carapaces, I made an educated guess that these were changelings as well.

Closer...closer...almost there...

Ginger's eye's suddenly blinked and focused. Her moment of reflection was over, it seemed. She watched me tearing through the air towards her, with a curious expression, either unaware of her situation or completely resigned to it.

So close! Ten feet! Eight feet! Seven!

Then, we entered the swarm. Almost immediately, I had to twist to avoid crashing into a black whir, losing valuable airspeed. The gap increased. No! A loud bang went off somewhere nearby. My brain's burst of power was abruptly terminated as I collided with something and was immediately sent into a tailspin, dazed and winded. I heard raspy cries of pain and fear. The aurora came down again like Odin's wrath not far from me, carving through them like an executioner's axe, and I winced at the intensity of the energy coming from it.

"Catch them!" I heard a voice cry. Was that Disarray? "I'll hold back the shapeshifters!"

I rightened myself, limbs spread-eagle'd. The ground was approaching. We were nearing the airships. That was it. Game over, man! Game over! I wondered what death would feel like. It would be sudden, at least. But I would linger, or so Mosspaw had told me. Unable to move on, thanks to the stupid spear across my back. A ghost. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad. I could go all over Equestria, and never have to run the risk of injury or hostilities! Yes...I could see it now. But then...Ginger would have to stay as well. I'd failed her. And the Greenclaws. And Wethoof. And...myself.

Daring Do's words to me came unbidden. Things are going to happen that you won't have control over. Things that won't be your fault, but you'll get swept up in them, regardless of that. You need to make sure that you don't blame yourself for them.

She was right, as usual.

This wasn't my fault. I gave it my best shot to fix it, at least.

I closed my eyes, and resigned myself to fate. I pictured her as I remembered her from our time at the treehouse, magenta eyes laughing at one thing or another, that cocky smirk on her face...I hoped she'd forgive me for this.

Whump!

"O-oof!" I wheezed, as something abruptly halted my descent. I felt something grabbing me under the arms. I opened my eyes and looked at my rescuer in utter disbelief.

HOLY FREYA'S NIPPLES WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!

It was a large alicorn, of all things, black as pitch and tinted green, with a flowing mane of...aurora? Its hooves were tightly gripping me in a secure hold. It looked down at me and smiled, revealing sparkling dark-green eyes and a flashy white smile.

"Hail," it said in a warm, masculine tone that reminded me of an acoustic guitar. "Fear not, for we will see you to your destination..."

A second alicorn, almost identical to the first, but with a more slender, ebony figure, tinged blue, flew up beside us. It was carrying Ginger in a similar fashion. She shared my look of utter confusion. The second alicorn grinned as well, dark blue eyes glimmering, and spoke in a deep, yet feminine voice like the ringing of church bells. "...for friends of Disarray are friends of the Lights! I am she called Australis..."

"...I am he called Borealis," finished my alicorn, with perfect timing.

Borealis? Australis? My brain finally resumed working with a startling realization. The Northern and Southern Lights! These guys were behind the aurora! And they were helping us! Thank you, Disarray!

"We need to get to the airships!" blurted Ginger, who seemed to have found her tongue. "Can you clear a hole through that storm...um, Your Majesties?" she said, unsure of what to call them.

Australis chuckled. "We care not for such titles, young one. But yes, we can assist you..."

"...We shall halt the winds that bind the ships." Borealis paused momentarily,flinching as if struck, and glanced up, his eyes widening in horror. "Or maybe we won't have to..." he murmured.

Australis followed his example. "...Oh, no," she breathed.

I cringed as the night lit up as bright as day, a terrible blast from above even dimming out the aurora, far more brilliant than the sun. It was purple-pink, the same color as my claws...

Then the shockwave hit.

We were knocked back like leaves in a stiff autumn breeze, the alicorns struggling mightily to control themselves. It washed over us, tinging everything violet and making my skin tingle furiously. My nerves contracted weirdly, my vision flashed. When the sensation passed, I shook my head to regain my senses.

The storm had been blown away from around the ships by the force of the mysterious explosion. I could make out figures on the two decks. One of them was the unmistakable color of Daring Do. Another was pure white. There was a third. It was...blue?

"Brace yourselves, young ones...!" cried Borealis.

"...For we must return to the skies at once! This landing may be a little rough," his twin answered.

Uh-oh.

Bzzzzap!

Another changeling was smacked out of the sky, trailing smoke. Entropy quickly snapped his wings to his sides and fell severel feet, narrowly avoiding two more of the creatures as they collided with each other above him, before he extended them out to full span, catching the uplifting thermals and propelling him onwards. He charged his magic once again, horn igniting a purple-pink, and winced as he fired, a trickle of sweat causing him to close an eye. Bzzzzzap! Bzzzzzap!

Despite himself, the alicorn grinned. That's two more changlelings who wouldn't be troubling anypony else. The swarm was still strong, though, and he was beginning to tire. Several scrapes and bruises dotting his figure were evidence of his careless lapses of attention, his colorful robe all but tatters now.

They couldn't keep up with him. But they didn't have to. They were so numerous that he was constantly surrounded, constantly kept on the edge of his hooves. One major slip up, and they'd tear him to pieces. Those sharp teeth of theirs were particularly nasty, not to mention those jagged horns...

It was like a dance, the alicorn reflected. Only if you made a bad step, you died. Violently.

Bzzzzzap!

Luckily, changelings are terrible dancers. Entropy carved another swath through them, his horn slicing and stabbing, leaving shredded and plummeting bodies in his wake. He risked a glance behind him. There was one on his tail, doggedly pursuing with the mindless stamina of a drone. He juked and rolled away, striking out at a nearby foe and neatly crushing its carapace. The pursuer was still there, still trailing. And it was gaining on him, he realized with shock. Either he was reaching his limits or this one was a cut above the rest. A foe like this could not be left unopposed. He must face it at once!

Entropy whirled and snapped open his wings, sending himself screeching to an absolute halt. He lowered his head, horn pointed out like a lance, ready to impale the changeling as it careened towards him, unable to halt its momentum.

He did not expect his foe to copy his move from earlier, closing delicate wings and dropping. They had learned, it seemed.

It was barely enough to miss Entropy's point by mere inches...

...But more than enough to send a jagged black horn through the alicorn's chest.

The pair hung for an instant, as Entropy gargled in pain, looking down in shock. The changeling looked equally surprised, both at its luck, and from the beams of purple-pink light that were seeping out of the pony from around the changeling's horn, which had pierced its foe up to where it met the forehead.

The changeling planted two holed hooves on him and pushed him off, tearing out vital flesh as the spiky horn withdrew with a ripping, tearing sound.

The alicorn tumbled away, the light coming from the wounded ever-increasing. The changeling suddenly sensed something very, very bad was about to happen. It took off as fast as it could, hissing in a terror that had come upon it unbidden.

Too slow. Far, far too slow.

For the second time that night, the sky lit up as Entropy exploded.

The refrigerator shuddered as it was needled by more ice lances. Daring Do kept behind it, breathing hard. Nearby, Disarray nimbly twisted, somehow stretching like rubber as his snakelike torso flexed and stretched. He paused from his acrobatics to gesture with his claws, as an anvil appeared in the air above their foe. It dropped, but was sent flying by a blast of cold wind.

"Is that all you've got?" called the figure on the sister ship, taunting her. It put its large blue paws on the railing and sneered. "I expected more from the legendary Daring Do! Such a disappointment."

Her temper flared. Why, if her wing wasn't all mangled up, she'd-

"-Augh!" she winced as the injured appendage flopped about. She'd just sit here, then. Yes. Sitting sounded very good right about now.

"Duck and cover!" crowed the draconnequus, "Eat pineapple, you icy fiend!" A prime example of said food appeared in his paw. He tore out the leaves with his teeth and pitched it at the mayor, who promptly evaporated as it harmlessly passed through him. The spiky fruit exploded, charring the deck and making the refrigerator shudder.

"I think somepony's in the mood for..." the sunglasses appeared on his face again. "...fruit salad?"

Daring Do never knew where the answering cry of "Awwwwwwwww yeaaaaaaah!" came from, and she never wanted to find out. Several more pineapples appeared in Disarray's appendages as he lobbed them across the deck. The fridge wouldn't hold out for much longer at this rate.

"Disarray! I need more cover!" she cried.

"And I need a better writer! I mean honestly, are my lines crafted by a fifth-grader?" he replied, as a blue shield emblazoned with a stylistic set of wings and three golden triangles winked into existence on his arm just in time to intercept an icicle. The draconequus spun, hurling the shield like a discus. This time, the mayor wasn't fast enough, and it sent him crashing to the deck, winded. The shield bounced back from the strike and landed perfectly back onto the thrower's arm. "Ha! Suck on that one, Captain America!" Disarray did a little shuffling victory dance. "Oh, right. Cover. On it!"

He gestured with a free claw, and a solid brick wall tore out of the decking. Daring rolled from the fridge to lean against it. A few seconds later it shuddered mightily as a comical outline of the draconequus' figure imprinted itself on the surface, pushing out bricks. He scrambled over and sat down, hard. The sunglasses were all but shattered, and the lower half of his dragon muzzle was covered in a block of solid ice.

"Mmmmfph-mmph, hmm fmmph!" said Disarray. He tugged on the ice encasing his mouth.

Daring couldn't resist herself. "You've got a little something. On your face. Just a little."

Disarray sent her a pointed glare, before starting suddenly, glancing upwards.

"What is it?" she asked him. "What's going-"

Her world suddenly turned purple-pink, as a thunderous blast of wind raced over the ships, casing the craft to begin spinning. The mighty walls of storm that had formerly encircled the craft were wiped away, as if a giant had blown them off like pesky cobwebs. The ships, tightly lashed together, ground against each other's hulls, sending a deep rumbling through her hooves and into her spine.

Daring tilted her hat back to its proper place, her mane sticking straight out behind her. She finally managed to close her jaw. Beside her, Disarray flinched, hard. His entire body pulsed the same color of the light that had just washed over them. For a second, there was an outline of an alicorn where he was, and then it vanished.

"Ow," he said. "Note to self. Blowing up hurts."

"What in Celestia's mane was that?" she asked him, breathless.

"That was the result of a 'Two-Sides, Same-Coin' spell," he replied. "My ugly half was unable to finish off the swarm, it seems. At least I'm whole again. Still, won't be able to change for a while... Oh! But don't worry, the cavalry is coming, provided they caught our good friends."

The brick wall groaned as Frost Snap renewed his assault, slowly being covered in ice and snow. A winter breeze came over Daring, causing her to shiver. "Caught who? What swarm?" she said.

"You cannot hide forever, Daring Do!" she heard the figure on the other ship shout. "Mayor! Finish this folly!"

Two black streaks zipped overhead, then. Daring heard the sound of something heavy impacting onto the deck. The ship was actually wrenched downwards a few inches. She peered around the wall.

Ginger Snap now crouched between her and Frost, the aurora's light glimmering off her black welding goggles. Echo was peeling himself off the wooden planks nearby, dazedly rising to his paws to unsheathe his spear. They faced the mayor, and a chilly wind began to blow.

A slow, sarcastic clapping began.

Everypony turned to the figure on the sister ship. Daring grimaced, and winced again as her wing moved.

"It seems the whole group of you are here!" it said. "Excellent! Wiping you out will be so much easier now. Individually hunting you all down is tiresome, and I've a busy schedule to fill."

It tensed its legs and leaped over the gap separating the ships, landing gracefully, all rippling muscle under its blue coat.

"I am going to enjoy this, very much," said Auitzhotl.

"Comin' in hot!" the gryphon barked. She seemed to be in charge of this group of pirates, the captain having taken off for the ships for some unknown purpose. She had talons with an iron grip, Coconut reflected, never once loosening her hold around his barrel.

They skimmed across the top of the wall, the tip of Coconut's dangling hooves barely brushing the structure. Around them, the other pirates flew in tight formation. Made of more gryphons and pegasi, but there was a scattering of earth-ponies and unicorns, being carried in a similar manner.

They dived, plunging over the edge and narrowly avoiding the neck of Big Daddy as he continued his enraged assault on the wall. Coconut felt his face pull back as they raced straight down. The gryphon carrying him let out a cry of joy. "Now this is flying!" The squadron pulled up at the last second, weaving through the thick of the field now, all craters and rubble and mangled hydra bodies. He struggled not to heave his lunch.

When the fireworks had gone off, Coconut had been struck dumb. The three magical explosives detonated simultaneously, more or less with enough force to liquefy the mud beneath the hydra's claws, and outright vaporize a good many of them. A terrible blow, but some had survived. Big Momma had been standing directly over one, and the hydra's sheer size had actually shielded a number of the offspring around her as the ground erupted. Those juveniles were now attempting to flee, scaling the embankments by climbing the bodies of their slain kin. Of the parents, only Big Daddy remained, but if the Benevolent Mercy had anything to say about that, then not for long.

KRACKA-BOOOOOOOOOMMMM!

The leviathan's body was ripped apart as the salvo slammed into its scaly hide. A direct hit! Slowly, the massive creature leaned backwards, bleeding profusely from multiple cannon wounds. A keening bellow sounded from one of the two necks it had that were still functioning - the others, battered or ravaged beyond saving. It collapsed like a great tower falling down, and the ground shook when it finally came to rest.

This wasn't a real battle, Coconut grimly realized, swallowing a surge of nausea. This was a slaughter. But better the hydras than the ponies, right? And they were tainted. They weren't natural. Wethoof and the Equestrian Guard were doing the world a favor by wiping them out before they could spread.

So why did he still feel so bad about it?

The ground came up beneath his hooves. He was back at the northern earth wall, behind the palisade. The grip around him vanished, and he stumbled under his own weight until he remembered how to walk again. Coconut looked around. There were no ponies on this part of the fall, they'd gone to the areas where the corpses piled high enough for the hydras to scale the embankment with ease. The pirates had flown back off over the battlefield, and proceeded to reap a harvest of death, picking off any left alive.

The hydras were done. All but a few remained, and those were even now being torn down by his fellows in gold or forest-colored armor. A nearby mare wearing the former color of protection was slumped against the wooden palisade. was she all right? He was about to go over to her when a scaly head burst through the wall, not three feet from where she was laying.

Horseapples! A juvenile, but still deadly. Coconut let out a wordless yell and rammed the thing with an armor-plated shoulder, folding its neck at the point of entry until it snapped with a terrible crack of bone. The length slid out of the hole as the hydra's weight pulled it back down the earthen wall. Coconut looked through the hole. Its other heads were limp and dangling, seared from the fireworks blast.

He'd...killed it.

He shuddered, and finally heaved up his lunch to the side, staggering around until he collapsed onto the ground next to the mare. He began shake as salty tears blurred his eyes.

The mare on the wall put a hoof on his shoulder. "We did it," she gasped to him weakly, cradling her side, where the metal plating had crumpled into her ribs like it had been made of paper. A juvenile must have gotten her in its jaws, unable to break through the solid material.

Coconut gritted his teeth and swallowed his misery. Time enough for that later. He was a stallion, damnit, and it was time he started acting like one. He rose and began to strip her of the armor to see the damage. He wasn't much of a healer, but he knew rudimentary first aid from his training. "Yep," he said sadly. "Hopefully we'll never have ta do it again."

Hopefully...

Overhead, the sky exploded into a startling purple-pink color. Coconut averted his eyes and went to work. Let somepony else take care of it. He'd had enough killing and fighting for one day - no. For his whole life.

I couldn't believe my eyes.

There he was, the thing that had made the spark that had started the fire.

Ahutizotl.

Alive.

"I must thank you, dog." He was pacing the length of the deck now, speaking to me in his accent that sounded like a cross between Joseph Stalin and Dracula. Frost Snap circled us warily at a distance, scowling and glaring death at me. "Throwing me into Tartarus turned out to be quite a profitable experience. I made quite a few friends," he purred, rubbing the strange black gem on his choker. "Friends who would like better their standing. To...relocate, if you will. They gave me many things for my assistance."

The pit I'd thrown him into...had been another hole into the underworld? Great! Just. Great.

"Stop talking. Let's finish the job!" Frost growled. "The sooner we leave, the better."

"Father, what's happening?" Ginger asked, a tremor in her voice. "What are you doing?"

The mayor fell silent, and the wind seemed all the colder.

Ahuitzotl laughed. "Why, fulfilling our end of the bargain, of course! The simple peasants these ships carry will provide us with more than enough for my other allies to feed on. They will be kept alive, that much is guaranteed." He grinned unpleasantly, baring his bear-trap of a maw. "But I imagine that eventually they'll waste away. Being drained of emotions on a constant basis will do that to a pony."

"You're behind the changelings?" I heard Disarray ask from behind us. I glanced back. Daring Do was peeking out from behind the out-of-place brick wall that had somehow appeared on the deck, an uncertain expression on her face. She was all right! Thank the Gods! "Interesting. And what is it they offered you, I wonder? They carry no currency, and obey none but their Queen. They hold no lands outside of Tartarus. They're also notoriously bad conversationalists."

"Power," Ahuitzotl replied, stroking the gem again. "They gave me the strength of the underworld, an army at my back, and promises of even more. And all they wanted in return was food! Can you imagine? Ha! It was a dream come true. They serve as a distraction along with the hydras, while I make off with the entire town! Simple!"

"What are you doing, you fool?" Frost Snap hissed. "Stop revealing everything!"

"I reveal nothing that could hinder our futures. They will not be leaving this ship alive. That, I assure you." He withdrew a whistle from where it was tucked inside his collar and blew it, sending out a high, piercing blast. The deck of the sister ship came alive as enormous cats of all kinds emerged from below. Pumas, tigers, leopards, cheetahs, lynxes, lions, house cats, snow leopards, jaguars...

...And lo and behold, a familiar fluffy white kitten, glaring at me with absolute hatred in its eyes.

Crap.

There was the sound of flapping feathers, and the sky around the airships was suddenly filled with pirates. Gryphons and ponies alike, all roguishly outfitted and scruffy enough to make their mothers cry. Several were holding members of the Wethoof and Equestrian guard, who looked to be knocked around quite a bit. They flew onto the deck and alighted, dropping their cargo at our feet.

Cloud Nine was among them. She staggered to her hooves, wings bound at her side with rope, like the others who the pirates had captured. "Trying...to breach the storm. These featherbrains jumped us." She was bleeding from a gash on her forehead, just under the lip of her helm, and those ropes looked very constricting. I moved to undo them, when I felt something extremely sharp tap the hollow of my chin. I froze.

"Don't even think about it," said Griffin the gryphon, keeping that monster sword of his steady. "All of you, get together now. And you two, the pegasus and that...thing behind that wall over there. I haven't killed anything yet today, so I'm a bit cranky. Don't make my mood worse. So MOVE IT!" he barked, stomping the deck with a lion paw. "Except her," he added, looking at Ginger.

Ginger ignored him. "Cloud, are you all right?" she asked, as she untied the pegasus with surprising tenderness.

Cloud Nine gave her shy grin. "Been better, Ginger."

Whoa. Didn't see that coming!

"Do what he says," Ginger told her, before turning back to resume her position away from the group. She shot a glare at Griffin. "I thought you were locked up."

"I was. Winter's here," he said with a smirk. "A change of seasons was in order."

That seemed to mean something to the mare, because her eyes widened and she started, before glancing at Frost and Ahuitzotl and thought better of it.

The captured pegasi, Daring Do, Disarray, and myself were quickly rounded up. Disarray looked amused with the whole thing, as if it were one big joke. Only Ginger was left outside the group. Griffin's pirates encircled the entire gathering, and the captain himself strode to stand beside Frost Snap.

Ahuitzotl actually looked impressed. "It seems you have pets of your own, mayor. Perhaps I underestimated you."

Griffin snorted. "Pet? Feathers, mate. If you've got the bits, you can call me whatever you want."

Frost said nothing, instead electing to continue to stare daggers at me.

Ahuitzotl then resumed his gloating. "It was far too easy," he continued. "The job was halfway done before I even took it! The gradual corruption of those disgusting hydras was accelerated easily enough, thanks to our beloved mayor, here." He gestured to Frost, who had the decency to look somewhat ashamed.

"You!?" Ginger shrieked. "You were behind the hydras? And working with the changelings? But...you're the mayor," she finished pathetically.

"The mayor of traitors and liars," Frost shot back, venom in his maddened icy-blue eyes. "The world would be better off without them. So they'll be replaced with loyal, trustworthy allies. With changelings." He slowly approached her, and circled. She didn't move an inch, but watched him with distrust. "Can you imagine it, Ginger?" he said as he trotted around her. "I'll have it all back...We'll have everything back! It will be like nothing ever happened!"

"You happened," Ginger said evenly.

Frost ignored that. "I know you've been wishing it as badly as I have. You could have it. Back when everything was good again! We could look at the clouds again, me, you, and your mother! We could run through the forest and laugh and smile and nothing, nothing could take that away! All the ponies who've passed away over the years will be back! We'll have gone back in time! We can start over! We can do things right."

Ginger shook her head sadly and raised her goggles. "See these? A pony once gave them to me so I'd never forget what I lost. What we lost. You can't replace her, Father. She's gone."

They looked at each other for a time, silent and still. "So be it," the mayor finally said. "You've thrown your lot in with them. The new Ginger will never betray me like this. Nopony will."

Ahuitzotl chuckled darkly. "It seems your time down there has touched a little more than your heart, Frost Snap. Perhaps you should have stopped after one drink from the river, yes?" Nearby, Griffin spun his sword on the deck by the point, watching with interest, his eyes unreadable.

"Silence!" Frost roared as he whirled about. "Or I'll freeze you solid and shatter you like glass! I will take no spite from you." Several of the pirates moved forward as if to back him up. "Stay where you are," he growled. "If I need your help, I'll ask for it."

"You dare threaten me? The terrible Ahuitzotl?" The blue creature looked amused at the very notion.

"No, I threaten the coward who hides behind his pets!"

The hulking blue creature narrowed its eyes at him. "A coward, am I? Come see if you're right, and we'll know who the coward is."

They had been moving closer and closer to each other, to the point where they were within spitting distance. The cats on the Mercy III milled around, unsure of what to do as their leader quarreled.

Slowly, I placed a paw on Ginger's shoulder. She flinched and turned as if to strike, but stopped herself. I tilted my head backwards, indicating we should retreat.

The mayor and Auitzhotl didn't move an inch, neither backing down. Insanity faced off against evil. The tension was palpable, like a coiled spring.

Frost moved first.

He lunged, faster than I could believe was possible, his horn extending into a great icy spike aimed straight between Ahuitzotl's heart. The foe didn't even move.

Frost's horn sank into the great blue chest, right up to the forehead. Several of the cats let out loud caterwauls. Ahuitzotl merely smiled, with a horn still in his body, and took a step backwards. Frost slid out of him, his horn coated bright red. The mayor was absolutely thunderstruck.

The gem on Ahuitzotl's collar pulsed black. The circular wound on his chest began to move as the flesh began to stitch itself back together before our eyes. "Please," he said. "Don't patronize me."

He twisted to the side and coolly extended a single, terribly long claw. He whipped back around and sank it straight into Frost's throat, up to the fingertip. The mayor gagged on it, coughing up blood, his eyes widened in surprise.

Ginger let out squeak of shock.

No... Mosspaw had appeared by my side again.

In a single movement, Ahuitzotl sliced the mayor wide open from his neck to his tail.

The white unicorn stood for a few more seconds, shuddering violently, before he pitched over to the deck with a wet thunk, a tidal wave of blood and gore spewing out from the fearsome wound. He looked in our direction and said something, but all that came out was a sick gurgling noise. His eyes were filled with fear and disbelief.

Ahuizotl stood over him. "Such potential. But no respect for his betters. A pity, really."

Frostycorn has fallen, Mosspaw's voiced resounded in my head. He sounded as shocked as I was. Then the blue one is now the prey.

Griffin loomed over the fallen mayor, who was still convulsing on the ground, gargling on his own blood, and looked at him with disgust. He spun the sword over his head and brought it down in an arc of black metal. The unicorn's suffering was halted in one merciful blow.

"Even pirates are against letting a pony die like that," he explained in a tight, clipped voice to Ahuitzotl. He flicked the blade to the side, leaving a spatter of crimson on the decking.

The hulking beast was unreadable. "Perhaps. I have slain your employer. Serve me, and you will receive all that he offered you."

"You sure about that?" the gryphon replied.

Ahuitzotl's eyebrow rose. "I am." He turned to his cats again and pointed as us. "Kill them. We've lingered here long enough. We must sail away before the changelings' numbers fail. The presence of the Lights was...unexpected. "

The pirate captain's feathers fluffed out a little. "So was this. CREW!" he roared. "WHO DO YA SERVE!"

"CAPTAIN GRIFFIN!" they roared right back.

"And who does he serve?"

"THE HIGHEST BIDDER!"

"And who's the highest bidder tonight?"

The pirates stomped the deck. "TYTHUS OF CANTERLOT!"

Captain Tythus...? Once again, you are without a doubt the most wily old fuck I've ever met in my life. That guy has an entire deck of aces up his sleeves. And he doesn't even have any sleeves! Still, I'd been wondering what he'd done with the pirates.

Griffin smirked. "Lads, untie the prisoners. We've got some booty to earn." Several of his crew moved to untie the bound pegasi, and the circle around us loosened up as their hostility evaporated like the wind. I brought out my spear and thumped it on the deck in approval. Yes! Villains always betray one another!

Auitzhotl gaped. "You...you dare defy me?"

"Pirate," Griffin said, as if that explained everything. "I defy things for a living. What are you gonna do about it? That trick you pulled with ice-for-brains lying on the deck over there? Please." He twirled the sword about in a graceful spiral. "I'm a little more capable than that."

"We'll see how capable you are in pieces," Auitzhotl retorted. "ATTACK!"

The cats on the sister ship surged forward, taking the gap like it was non-existent. The pirates gave a rousing cry and met them head on. The decks exploded into conflict as the waves collided into screams and snarls and flashing claws.

Ginger was swept away almost immediately, bowled over by a puma and a gryphon pirate rolling around, grappling for dominance. She vanished into the chaos.

"Ginger!" shouted Cloud Nine, starting forward, a pained expression on he face. With a hiss, she whirled about and barked a command. The pegasi guards quickly formed a perimeter around us, a safe haven in the fight as we backed towards the stern, which was still clear.

Suddenly, Daring was by my side. I'd never been so glad to see her in my life. She looked terrible, her shirt torn and ripped, her helmet dinged and scraped, and one of her wings was held tight to her side, small rivulets of blood tracing her feathers. But she was still safe. "We need to get these ships down!" she said over the din of battle. "The helm is just over - wuagh!" was all she got, before I swept her up into a tight hug. She stiffened, before returning the embrace with just as much enthusiasm. "Nice to see you too, big guy," I head her murmur.

I didn't care about the ships, or the town, or even Ahuitzotl. For that briefest instant, I lost myself to her. Nothing else mattered, and I was overjoyed that she was safe.

But, like all precious moments, it passed.

I set her back down as gently as I could and knelt before her. "You are going to have to land the ships without me. I've got some unfinished business with Ahuitzotl." Her face fell into a frown. "Don't worry, I'll take care of myself. I made a promise. It's considered good manners to keep those, you know." Daring gave me a small, sad smile. Before I could react, she leaned close. I felt something press into my forehead, soft and warm. Then she pulled back.

"I'll be holding you to it," was all she said, with a bit of a smirk. Then she spun around. "Disarray! Come on, we've got a ship to fly!"

The draconequus, who had been standing nearby with a crafty grin said, "Of course, madame. Would you like a complimentary bag of nuts on this flight?" Daring laughed and took off up the stairs to the helm, not giving him a response. Disarray began to follow, but paused at the top of the flight. "Hey, Echo! Shipping. On a ship." He snickered. "How great is that? That's like...shipception."

I scowled and gave him the finger, trying to get my heart to stop thundering so loud. Why is it so hot all of a sudden? He cackled and continued onward.

I turned to face the battle, but was still encircled by the pegasi, who had formed a line across the stern, preventing the battle from spilling to the poop deck and helm. Cloud Nine gave me a backwards glance from where she was bracing. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Forward." I thumped my spear on the ice-covered deck again. "I've got a score to settle."

"Are you insane, dog? This is a madhouse. You'll be cut down!" she replied.

I had no time for this. I issued an ultimatum, and hoped the mare wouldn't feel too back into a corner to decline it. "You're more than welcome to try and stop me, but I'd rather have you on my side than against it. And I'm going regardless of what you tell me. Ginger is out there, and she needs help. So what's it going to be?"

Cloud Nine frowned for a few moments. When I'd said Ginger's name, her eyes had widened. She looked to the pegasus on her left. "Whirlybird! Hold the line. I'm going in with the dog to make sure he doesn't get himself killed." She stood aside, allowing me to pass through them to the fight. With a grunt, I went down to all fours and sprinted through, tackling a large leopard, squashing him flat into the into the deck. My teeth met in the back of his neck, and he went limp. I shook my head savagely and tore out a hunk of flesh, swallowing it greedily. Meat! Oh, how I've missed you! I tossed him aside, muzzle now covered in blood. Cloud Nine looked at me with hesitation.

"Try and keep up," I told her. "I'm going to get carried away."

The pirate that the leopard had been mauling staggered back up, before throwing me a wink and racing back into the fray. Feathers and fur flew everywhere. The deck was covered in a thick carpet of battling pirates and jungle cats, both groups vying for supremacy. Towards the bow, I could see Griffin and Ahuitzotl exchanging blows, but every time the gryphon scored a hit, the wound sealed itself!

I bared my teeth. No! That blue bastard is my kill!

My spear came alive in my hand as I literally threw myself into the fight. It was an ugly thing, with no order or reason to it; a mosh pit of cracking breaking bones, torn limbs, and bleeding hearts. With no actual skill with my weapon, I simply used it like a giant bludgeon, laying about with long, sweeping strikes that soon began to clear a path to the bow.

A tiger sprang onto my shoulder from somewhere behind me. I went down hard, and its weight pressed me into the deck. I couldn't reach it! Savage jaws closed around my forearm as it tore off my bracer. I heaved and twisted, but it slammed me back down. Claws raked down my backside, but the segmented spine-plates did a good job of absorbing the blows.

I heard the tiger wheeze in surprise as its bulk was lifted from me. I rolled over to see Cloud Nine bucking it in the face. "I guess I caught up!" she said, pausing between kicks.

Smart ass.

I surged back to my feet, but no sooner had arisen when a panther came at from the front. I brought my arms up to block, and the strike tore through my other bracer, the damaged armor falling away as it was ripped off. Recovering quickly, I cracked it over the head with the butt of my spear and punted it away. It rolled into another group of cats, knocking them over like bowling pins. I had to grin at that, despite the situation. Steeeee-rike!

A nearby knot of conflict erupted into flame and smoke, bodies flying everywhere. Ginger was up! A whirling vortex of green fire encircled the mare as she sent blast after blast of power into the fray, her goggles glimmering weirdly from the harsh light of her magic.

I managed to reach her, wading through another small battle while somehow managing to get my toga ripped and torn. I honestly couldn't believe it'd lasted this long anyway. I whistled loudly for her attention, and when she glanced at me, I pointed towards the bow and shook my spear. She got the message.

The mare spun on her front hooves, her rear ones suddenly glowing green. With an audible shout of effort, she bucked her legs out to the bow and a mighty torrent of fire issued forth from her hooves in a powerful surge that bowled over pirate and cat alike for at least thirty feet in a single direction.

Cloud Nine appeared at my side again, and the three of us charged through the gap before it closed with the press of bodies. There! On the very end of the ship, Ahuitzotl had cornered the pirate captain onto the bowsprit, where he had to awkwardly hover at a distance to avoid getting permanently de-winged by those quick black claws. The blue creature turned halfway to us, one paw keeping the captain cornered, the other poised to strike in our direction. His tail lashed in delight. "Dog! So good to see you."

The area seemed to clear around us. My vision focused, my nose filled with his scent. I felt the feral strength return, guided by the prospect of an end to the hunt. A large paw touched my shoulder. I didn't need to know who it was. Go, came Mosspaw's voice. Grant us the gift of peace.

"Clear out, gryphon!" Ginger said, shooting a small sphere of fire at the foe. "We'll handle this one."

Griffin was no fool. Seizing his chance for escape, he vaulted over Ahuitzotl's head as he turned to bat away the ball of magic. "Thanks, doll," he said cheekily to Ginger before pushing past us into the battle. A sudden spray of blood and three distinct sounds of severed heads hitting the frozen deck, coupled with a sudden outburst of singing as he fought made me realize just how glad I was that he was on our side. He was an artist with that blade of his.

The three of us had Ahutizotl cornered at the bow. He paced and watched us coolly. It seemed we would be making the first move.

The aurora above intensified with an audible hum, to such an extent that the stars and moon were blocked from view. The entire sky was carpeted with swirling color. Whatever was going on up there, Australis and Borealis seemed to be winning. I could see why our foe was so worried about the presence of the Lights, as he had called them.

Almost as impressive was the sight of the Benevolent Mercy rising from the west, gracefully rising to meet the swarm as well.

KRACKA-BOOOOOOOOOMMMM!

I actually felt sorry for the changelings. Poor bastards.

"We'll take him together," Cloud Nine stated evenly. She outranked us. "Ginger, you take the center, push him back. Echo, you're on-"

Whatever she had to say, I didn't hear it. I raced forward alone, tongue lolling out of my mouth, my body acting of its own accord. Ahuitzotl bared his teeth and moved to meet me.

I brought the spear down from high like an axe, seeking to chop his face in twine. He caught the blow with his paws, muscles straining as he halted it a good foot away. I snarled and pressed downwards. For an instant, nothing happened. Then, slowly, the arcanite spearhead moved closer, inch by inch. Too easy! I looked into Ahuitzotl's gaze, eager to see the fear in his eyes, but there were none. He was smiling!

He pushed the spear away and slashed at me, narrowly slicing the tip of my nose open. My sensitive snout exploded into pain, and I retaliated by ducking under his next strike to strike at his neck. He twisted, and the blow only cut a thin line in his arm, his gem pulsing immediately as the minor wound began to heal. I lurched forward again, my teeth snapping at his face in blind fury, my rear paws scrabbling wildly. One of them hooked under his leg and pitched us over.

Whatever that damn gem was, it was keeping him alive!

We fell onto the deck in a whirlwind of teeth and claws and metal. I completely surrendered myself to the howling beast within, giving him an eye for an eye every time a blow landed, regardless of how quickly they dissipated. I was immune to pain. I was immune to fear. I was a diamond dog!

With a roar, he locked his legs under me and exploded them into my stomach, catapulting me up into the air. I rolled with the momentum, flipping once and neatly landing on my paws, rushing back to him without even pausing for breath, pushing him, back, back, back against the bow! Yes! I had him now! I could push him over!

I never saw his tail coming.

The prehensile appendage lashed out and swept my feet out from under me. I crashed to the deck - the same exact move he'd used on me the first time we'd met, and I'd fallen for it again! This time, however, before he could press his advantage, an armored pegasus slammed into his face, sending him reeling. Cloud Nine struck out with her hooves again, but missed, giving her foe time the time to recover. Ahuitzotl calmly sidestepped and lunged, his impressively large maw closing around her throat.

"Cloud! No!" Ginger screamed, racing into the fray, her horn alight. With his pawed tail, the beast gripped her head and smashed her face into the deck, cracking the ice and smearing it with blood. Cloud Nine shrieked horribly, her cry warping into a weak gurgling noise as Ahuitzotl pulled his head back, taking half her neck with him. He casually tossed the pegasus onto the deck, where she landed in a heap of feathers by my side. She rolled into me, convulsing weakly, her life bleeding out.

Our eyes met. She silently pleaded with me to do something, anything. I could see myself reflected in her gaze, ragged and bleeding from cuts and scrapes I'd accumulated without my knowing. I looked almost as terrified as she was.

And then she died.

It was so sudden. With another whimpering gurgle, she just...went still. Her eyes glazed over, focusing on something past my shoulder. The terrible wound in her neck bright red blood.

That had been me, I realized. But I'd had Daring Do to save my life. Cloud Nine hadn't a chance. There had been no time.

I vaguely realized that there was a shadow looming over me.

Ahutizotl's tail snaked down and grasped me by the throat. He heaved me into the air, and I dangled limply in his grip. The black gem on his collar seemed to shimmer with delight.

Game over, man. Game over.

"Did you really think you could stop me?" he asked. Of course, I didn't respond. "Did you really think that you could best the great Ahuitzhotl, who has vanquished foes far greater than you? Stupid mutt. You've been out of your league at every turn. I. Am. Invincible." He leaned forward. "And you are nothing more than a mongrel diamond dog. The scum of the world."

...

That's it!

I'd been relying on my body's instincts to face him...

But I wasn't all diamond dog, was I?

My brain sparked to life, taking over from the terrible shock that Cloud Nine's death had done to my body.

What would a human do here, I wondered. The foe is too powerful to face alone. Normal weapons won't keep him down. I'd be annihilated. I needed help to beat him. I needed something else. I needed a distraction...

Nearby, Ginger coughed and staggered to her knees. One of her goggles' lenses had been smashed, revealing a green eye that actually glowed with rage. Ahuitzotl didn't notice, intent on my imminent demise.

Perfect!

My brain worked overtime. Countless scenarios played in my mind's eye. Most of them ended in death. Several in Ginger dying. But there was one that looked promising. One that solved every single problem in one go... I had to grin wickedly at this. If there's one thing every human is born with an innate talent for, it's finding the easy way out. I'd definitely found it.

Ahuitzotl frowned and glared at me. "You smile in the face of death? Fool. There will be no rest for you. I will carve out your very soul and enslave it!" That's right, big boy. Keep talking. Just a few more seconds...

Three...

Two...

One...

Let's do this.

He never expected his limp, boneless opponent to suddenly surge into motion. I twisted my neck violently, chomping straight through his tail. He shrieked in agony as the blue paw thunked to the ground, but the tip of his tail was already healing. Now released, I rammed into him, right in the gut, and savagely lunged upwards, cracking him in the jaw with the top of my dense skull. He reeled away, cursing in a strange, guttural language.

I merely planted my spear in the deck and stood where I was. "I yield," I wrote to him.

Mosspaw appeared by my side again. You betray us! What have you done?!

Ahuitzotl hissed at me like a cat, his wounded tail lashing furiously. "NO! You will pay for that!"

Ginger finally managed to regain her footing. I looked to her and the spear, then back again. Her visible eye widened. I hoped she caught the message.

Ahuitzotl hit me like a tank. My rear claws extended, sinking through the ice as he pushed me back several feet until I halted the press. My hind legs strained with all their might. I looked into his face and snarled.

My left knee gave way. He surged forward with renewed vigor, tipping me over. Instead of trying to pull away, however, I embraced him, my powerful forearms wrapping under his pits in a crushing bear-hug. I fell onto my back, his weight almost knocking the wind out of me. I clenched him to me so tightly that neither of us could move.

He let out a piercing wail, his head uselessly flailing over my shoulder. He knew what was coming next.

Ginger stood over us, Mosspaw's spear in a telekinetic grip. The edge gleamed, seeming sharp enough to split reality itself.

"This is for my father!" she screamed, her horn flaring. The weapon streaked downwards and buried itself in the back of Ahuitzotl's neck, straight through his golden collar. I felt him shudder against me as the blade exited out the front and sank into the ice on the deck. Already, I could see it begin to heal out of the corner of my eye.

Ginger wrenched it out of him in a spray of blood and gore.

"This is for my Cloud!" I felt it stab through his back, straight through his spine and into my chest, where it was halted by my armor. I barely managed to lift a single claw to write, "Fire! Use fire!" She got the message.

"And this is for Wethoof!"

Her horn flashed a brilliant green, and the light pouring from her eye became almost blinding. Ginger lowered her head and and absolute inferno roared forth, jetting into Ahuitzotl and myself in a hellish emerald blaze. The heat was unbelievable. I closed my eyes and held my breath, mentally screaming as I felt the hide on my forearms burn away, caught directly in the blast. Faces seemed to flash on the inside of my eyelids, tinged green by the hell swirling around me. There seemed to be no particular order. I saw Coconut. Captain Tythus. Bellows the smith. The waitress from the restaurant. Cloud Nine, Sparky, and Baritone. Disarray. Lord Borealis and Lady Australis. Griffin the gryphon. Popper. Blueback. Ginger. And finally, Daring...

I don't know how long I stayed like that.

Eventually, I had to wheeze for breath, and was surprised to find the air cool and refreshing. I opened my eyes.

I was still lying down on the deck, but a fine coating of ash lay atop me. It was all that seemed to be left of Ahuitzotl. I was smoking furiously, my cloak all but burned away, my armor hot and black against my skin. My exposed forearms looked charred. There was no hair on them. I tried to wiggle a finger, but they didn't respond. I could barely move. Nothing worked. But despite everything, I was alive. I had banked my survival on how tough the body of a diamond dog was, and won. The sounds of battle had lessened, the fighting was almost over.

A gust of wind blew away the ash covering me, revealing the black gem that had been inside Ahuitzotl's collar. It rolled off my chest and fell to the deck.

Ginger stood a few paces away, breathing hard, the spear still held in a magic grip. Mosspaw winked into existence by our side. A new alpha has risen, he said. Ginger Snap, kin-of-my-kin...guide your pack well. He looked at me. I...apologize. I did not know what you intended. Thank you, silent one.

Beside him, two more figures appeared. One was a ruby red mare, the other a strong, noble white stallion who would have been completely unrecognizable had I not seen him before as he once was. They went to Ginger and embraced her, as she finally broke down into weak, heart-wrenching sobs.

And for that briefest of instants, Ginger had her family back. They stood for a few moments, having a conversation that was meant for her and her only.

I leaned my head back, my charred fur rubbing against the incinerated remains of my hood. In the skies above, the aurora was dwindling. The stars were back, glittering and pulsing with life. They didn't seem so cold anymore. The horizon suddenly rose up. We'd descended back down under the walls of Wethoof now. The ships had landed. Daring Do had done it. We'd won.

A ghostly shape appeared in my vision. It was Frost, looking down on me with not a trace of hatred on his face. Thank you, Echo. For giving me a second chance. What I failed to do in this life, I will make up for in death. The stallion bent over and touched the tip of his horn to my forehead. I stiffened as a tide of something strange washed over me. It was warm, and tender, and fierce all the same.

It was love.

It was his love for his family, for his town. It was everything he had embodied before falling, and it was utterly beautiful. When he pulled back, I had tears in my eyes. I understood now what a pony he had been.

The three specters gave us a parting wave, and as one, dissipated from view.

Ginger strode over to me on wobbly knees, the spear tucked under a foreleg. Her horn lit up again. I felt myself become wrapped up in a tingly cocoon, but it fizzled out. She moaned and collapsed by my side, exhausted. Next to her lay the corpse of Cloud Nine. I heard her whimper as she reached over and closed the dead mare's eyes.

"It's all over?" she asked me weakly.

I managed the tiniest of nods.

"Good..." The firestorm must have taken a lot out of her, because her visible eye fluttered closed, and she went still, her chest rising and lowering steadily.

I felt world begin to sink away, the peculiar sensation of falling into myself. The toll of the last few days was catching up to me all at once. I craned my gaze to the sky.

The last thing I saw before the blackness overcame me were the stars.

Author: This chapter is dedicated to my editor, Nathan Traveler, without whom, this story would completely blow chunks. Thanks, mate, from the bottom of my three-sizes-too-small heart.

(22) Darwin Be Damned

Where am I?

I was drifting, that much could be certain.

There was only a deep blackness, soft as silk and as encompassing as a lover's embrace. It went in all directions; up, down, left, right. I turned to see if it extended behind me as well, when I realized that I had not actually moved, and yet the sensation of motion was felt.

My body had been left behind. Wherever I was, whatever I was, it seemed that matter had no purpose. I had no heart nor brain, yet I lived and thought. I simply was. Unbounded consciousness.

Is this death? I wondered to myself. The silent dark made no reply. Is this the next life? Only my own thoughts provided the singular source of a disturbance.

It was very peaceful, to say the least.

The feeling was akin to floating on one's back in water. Not so much the touch of the water on one's skin, but the sensation of being carried and held in suspension. If this is death, it's not really that bad. A bit lonely, perhaps. And a tad boring. Spending long periods of time with only your mind for company could also result in...interesting psychological effects.

Still, there wasn't much I could do about it, adrift in a sea of shadow as I was. Nothing but time on my hands, now. For however long of a time I would be here. Hmmm...if this is death, then I expect I'll be like this till the end of time.

Eternity never looked so vast. Even more so with the absence of liquor.

Why is the rum always gone?

The darkness was apathetic to my plight. If it knew my thoughts, it kept them to itself. I mentally sighed to myself and began to ponder how long I was going to last before I snapped. A week? A year? Or did time have any meaning here, at the edge of reality?

I'm not sure how long I spent like that. I am sure of when I snapped out of it, though; when the light first appeared.

It didn't burst into existence. No. It sort of...faded into being, as if that makes sense. It was like the darkness slowly melted away in one little section, leaving only an absence of itself. If there had been a great basket over my non-existent head, someone had just poked a hole in it.

A small, distant light, a pinprick in the black. That's all it really was. A star. The last star, maybe. Was this the end of the universe? When that star went out, would it all be over? I didn't want that. The star shouldn't be allowed to wither away.

The star flickered, and pulsed. The increase of light revealed a sort of sloping cone that it was perched on, long and narrow, spiraling grooves running down it like a screw, trailing off into the abyss. It was a black as its surroundings, and the only reason I could see it was that the star illuminated its ebony surface.

The shape moved closer, and closer, and closer still. I felt like it was traveling a vast distance, in such a short amount of time...and yet the brightness seemed to dim. Finally, the tiny star drew to a halt some ways away.

Whatever it was, the shape below it was enormous.

It moved. The entire mass moved again, and I felt like an entire planet's worth of matter had shifted in the process. The star rose upwards, and the spiraled shape followed smoothly, like an immense, slender tower, rising out of the deep.

Wait...that's no tower...

The realization hit me like a semi doing eighty on the freeway. In short, it completely shattered me.

It's a horn.

Far, far above, the star flickered once more. But before me, colors began to seep into existence, deep blues and geens and reds and yellows and pinks, swirling and waving in a non-existent wind. Other small stars flashed to life within the ether, twinkling and blinking in the language of the cosmos.

The horn thickened out, suddenly stopping. Then, the monolithic head it was attached to rose out of the darkness, impossibly huge,and the only reason I could discern its shape was that it blocked out the lights behind it. Two massive eyes opened, filled with colors I had no name for, and a terrible knowledge contained within blazing white pupils.

It saw me.

I felt completely insignificant at that moment, as if in the water, swimming alongside a great whale. Whatever this thing was...the sheer size of it alone was enough to make even the most arrogant consider themselves nothing but ants. And the rippling nebula trailing behind it seemed to contain entire stars systems, if not all of space and time.

The eyes blinked. It took them a full ten seconds to fully open and close, despite the eyelids moving at unnaturally fast speeds.

A mouth opened.

A warm breeze issued forth, filling my being with energy and life. I hadn't realized it before, but I'd been so cold, so empty...I could feel my body again, though it faint.

The wind carried a noise, as well.

"HOLD HIM DOWN!"

"Gauze, get another restraint!"

Unbearable agony burned, concentrated on my arms and chest. I smelled smoke. My lungs heaved wildly, my eyes uncomprehending of what they saw. Bright lights flashed everywhere. Something was trying to tie me down!

"Hold him, damnit!"

"What's going on in here!?"

I struggled and lashed frantically, attempting to release myself. I had to get out! I have to be...somewhere!

"Agh! Celestia's mane, he bit me!"

"He woke up under the knife! We have to get him back under!"

"Wow, look at those burns..."

No! This can't be happening! I won't let you take me!

"Somepony bring her in, he listens to her, right?"

"GET A MUZZLE ON HIM, FOR LUNA'S SAKE!"

"He bucking bit me!"

"Shut up, Gauze, and hold his head down! You're lucky you aren't taking this end - these claws can cut through stone, I hear."

"Where the buck is she?"

"Doctor Triage went to get her, shouldn't be too lon~!"

I heaved with all my might, but was slammed back down, cracking my head and disorientating myself.

"What's happening here?" Who was that? Was that Daring? NO! They got her, too!

"Gauze, prep an anesthetic. Quadruple the dosage, I'm not having him up again, do you hear me! I don't care if he ends up comatose, we've got other lives to save here and we can't do it if he cuts us to ribbons! Miss Do, we need you to calm him down, he listens to you. We can't operate if he's conscious, and especially like this."

"Echo. Stop." I felt something press softly onto my neck, just below my scar.

I froze.

"Holy buck...his eyes changed back. Look at the pupils, they're round again."

"Beauty tames the savage beast, eh?"

"How did she...?"

"Nevermind that, get that anesthetic in him while he's not moving!"

"Echo. Just relax, okay? You're all right. Everything's going to be all right...just relax, okay?" Daring's voice whispered in my ear, the pressure on my throat constant, and almost reassuring. My breaths lengthen, and I sucked in a long gasp of air. Immediately, the fire brewed up in my chest again, and screamed into my arms. I whined piteously and struggled.

"No, no, don't worry. Shhhh...it's okay, I'm here, I won't let anything bad happen...just stop fighting it. You've done enough. You can let go. Let go..."

With a mighty effort, I held myself still, my brain still roaring at me to get up, to resist and cling to wakefulness, to claw and tear and maim whatever was holding me down.

There was a nip on the center of my chest. I violently flinched, whimpering.

"It's okay...eeeaasy..."

I felt heavy all of a sudden, sinking back down into nothingness.

"Aaaaaaalll...gooooooing...toooo...beeeeee...oooookaaaaayyyy...I prooooooomissse..."

I surrendered myself to the void once more.

The tray hit the picnic table with a bit too much force, causing the small box of fries to rattle and tip over. I hastily retrieved the fallen brothers as I sat down and gave them a proper funeral - in my stomach. The main course was mercifully unmolested, the sesame seeds on its bun glistening under the cheap parking lot lighting. A small trail of grease trickled out from in between two hand-crafted all-beef patties, which were delicately nestled between respective layers of bacon and cheese. The bun was lightly toasted. Just the way I like it.

Delicately, I wrapped my hands around the delectable sandwich, my mouth already watering in anticipation. I licked my lips in a manner that was almost nervous. I closed my eye and inhaled through my nose, blasting my brain with the most teasing of food related sensory input. Oh, Gods, yes! I haven't had one of these babies in over a month! So gooooooood...

Slowly, so very slowly, as if giving a kiss to a lover, I raised the feast from its wrapping, my jaws widening. I promised myself that I was going to savor it, to feel the emotion of every bite. Such a meal comes only a rarely in a lifetime. This was going to be one for the history books.

"Ahem. Excuse me, Romeo, but are you going to eat that, or make out with it?'

My eyes flew open. I whirled about to the source of the voice. Whoever it was, I was going to stomp my foot up their ass so hard that when I pull it out, their colon will be wrapped around my leg like an ankle-bracelet. I summoned every single combative move known to me, ready to slam this poor, unlucky son of a bitch into a gibbering, hopeless wreck of a human being. Nobody gets between me and my fast food! I focused on him in with murderous intentions...

...And promptly froze in shock. I struggled to make some kind of coherent statement, but for a moment, I'd actually forgotten how to speak, thanks to the lack of use of my throat.

"Buh," I managed to squeak out. It was raspy and strained, as if I'd been sick.

"Buh?" said Discord. "That's a new one. No, 'YOU,' spoken in a growling, threatening undertone, or perhaps a verbal assault no doubt intended to make me feel terrible about myself?" He snorted. "Honestly. Your kind never ceases to surprise me. Just when I thought I've got you down to nuts and bolts..."

He looked the almost the same way I'd seen him previously, back in the coffee shop. A tan short-sleeve shirt in place of a tracksuit, covered by a grease-stained apron, an obnoxiously scraggly fu-manchu, those beady, mismatched eyes...

Wait just a cotton-pickin' minute!

I glanced down. Green sweatshirt. Grey jeans. Boots. Different leg structure. I lifted an arm and pulled the sleeve back. Skin. Hands. Five fingers. No claws. The hand went to my face, trembling a little. More skin. Pathetic excuse for a beard. Nose. Ears on the side of my head. Short hair. The hand came down and rested limply on my lap. I slumped into my seat.

I'm a human!?

But if I'm human again, where in seven hells am I?

For the first time, I glanced about, becoming aware of my surroundings. It was night, and I was outside what appeared to be a small, old school diner. Crazy Dee's Drive-in Diner, screamed a nearby sign with cheap neon. We were on a hill somewhere, a lonely mountain road. I was sitting on a picnic table some ways away, looking out over a great valley. Below me, the lights of a human city twinkled and glittered, organized in neat rows of squares, chased with flowing veins of red and and gold that could only be roads and highways.

Where had I been before? There had been...bright lights...and yelling. I had been in so much pain...

I turned back to Discord, and took a deep breath. "I'm...home?" I lamely concluded, taking much more effort to talk than normal. How had I even gotten here?

"I'm not sure, are you?" he replied, smoothly sinking down onto the bench across from me. He untied the apron around his chest and tossed it onto the end of the table. "'Home' is such a relative concept."

"So...I'm asleep," I deduced after a moment of thought, my speech already coming back to me. "I didn't die. This is just a dream." My reasoning seemed solid enough. How else could I have got to wherever the hell I am from the coffee shop back in my city?

"Is it?" he smirked.

I glanced around again. A small metal fork rested on the tray. Without a second of hesitation, I scooped it up and slammed it down into my leg as hard as I possibly could.

Thunk!

"HOLY-SON-OF-A-FLAMING-NUTCRACKER-FUCKING-NIP-NIPS-ASSCRACKER-BITCHTITS-CUNT-CUNT-CUNT-SNOTNOSED-FUCKITY-GOOCHLICKING-FUCKSALT-ODIN'S-CRUSTY-BALLSACK-THAT-HURTS-BAD!"

Discord winced at the sight of a utensil buried in my thigh. "And the point of that was what, pray tell?"

I moaned piteously, sucking in pained breaths. "Not supposed. To feel pain. When you're dreaming. Supposed to wake you up."

"Couldn't you have just, I don't know, flick yourself?" Discord pinched the brow of his nose and shook his head. "No. You go straight for the stabbing with the forks." He began to mockingly applaud me. "Bravo. Bra-vo, I say."

My fingers reflexively clenched from a fresh wave of pain as I gripped the table. "So I'm not dreaming?" I muttered through a clenched jaw. That fork was going to have to come out.

Discord merely reached over and popped a fry into his mouth. "Well. That depends. Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy? Regardless of which, you're caught in a landslide. No escape from reality." He took a bite out of another fry, a meditative look on his face as he chewed. "Why can't this and Equestria be real? And, for that matter, why can't they both be imaginary? If you really want to know, might I suggest looking at that peculiar necklace you have on."

Necklace...? I lifted a hand from where it was applying pressure to my thigh and placed it to my chest. Sure enough, I felt something press against me, about the size of a pocket-watch. Giving Discord a suspicious glance, I dug into my sweat shirt and pulled the object out. The familiar sight of the object caused be to suck in a breath of surprise. My pain was completely forgotten.

It was Daring's compass.

Even weirder was the fact that it didn't seem to be attached to me by anything, and yet, when I tried to pull it away, a pressure tightened around my neck, almost like an invisible rope of some sort. I flipped it open. The needle was still spinning wildly, one second rock steady, the next, moving as fast as a propeller. My fingers trembled a little as I closed it and let it dangle, as if hanging in mid air.

"Some things run deeper than reality," Discord cryptically stated. "It's all a matter of perspective."

I was stunned for a moment. How could this be possible? If I was truly back on Earth, than how did I have the compass? And if I was dreaming, how could I truly feel pain? The two questions ricocheted around the inside of my skull like two rocks in a trash can, banging and crashing with exponentially increasing volume.

I responded by gritting my teeth and yanking the fork out of my leg, hissing as I did so. I threw it at him. He ducked away and rebounded, cackling. "Ho-ho! Ha! You throw like an armless cripple." Discord wiped a few tears of mirth away and flicked them to the side, where they transformed into a couple of birds that flew off into the night. "Hmm," he said. "I was going for bats that time. Oh, well. Chaos is as chaos does, I suppose."

"What -ach!- do you want from me?" I managed to gasp as I took off my sweatshirt to apply pressure to the four small holes in my leg.

Discord leaned back on thin air and put his arms behind his head. "Entertainment. Plain and simple. It's boring being frozen. On top of this, you see, I am a draconequus. I live, breathe, and eat chaos. I need it to survive, human. And I don't want to die. Death is so...permanent. No doubt you've already had a taste for it, yes?"

"How exactly -ow!- do I fit into keeping you alive? And how are you not currently petrified in the Canterlot Gardens?" I said, as I tightened my makeshift bandage.

"While my body may be imprisoned, my mind is free to roam," he replied evasively. "As for how you fit into my continued existence - just keep doing what you're doing. You've already had a central role in one of the biggest battles Equestria has seen for the past... Oh, I don't know, three-or-four hundred years? Time keeps on slipping into the future, more so when you're stuck in one position." He paused and scratched his nose. "Ugh! That's the stuff right there. Feels good to scratch again."

"I'm not killing anything for you, if that's what your asking. I've no love for -agh!- bloodshed."

"Killing? Heavens above! I'm not asking you to kill! How anti-chaotic. Life is chaos, you see, and the more life there is, the more chaos! Why do you think I protected my subjects so well during my brief reign? And I'd imagine your so tired of killing already, aren't you, soldier boy?"

I felt myself grow still, an uncomfortable sensation creeping over my skin. How did he know about that? I'd thought I'd outrun this long ago... "You protected them from everything but yourself," I smoothly retorted. "As for what I've done, that's none of your business."

"It is my business, because you're my business."

"You were a tyrant."

"I never killed anypony." He actually looked offended. "In fact, more often than not, I saved lives! I just had a little fun on the side, is all. What I am asking you to do is keep shaking things up. Your actions have already caused so many upsets of power...I won't lie to you - I'm finding it delectably sustaining."

I sighed, rubbing my temples with a hand. Weird how I managed to do that so easily; this body fits me like an old glove. It's like I never left it. "What's in this for me?" I asked him. "it's not like I'm not going to start wreaking havoc without a good reason. And even then..." I drifted off.

He snorted. "You're so noble, aren't you? It doesn't matter what you want, though. You are, for better or worse, a human. Chaos flocks to you like little children to an ice-cream van. That is not something you will ever be able to control. Wherever you will go, interesting events will occur. Of course, they won't all be as significant as what happened in Wethoof, but they will happen nonetheless. You are bound to set many a gear in motion. Change is in your very nature, just as mine is of disharmony and chaos."

Those three concepts were eerily similar. Too much so for my liking. "So why bother asking me if I'll keep doing it?" I said, finally succumbing to my hunger and picking up the cheeseburger. "If I don't have any choice in the matter, what's the point?" I licked my lips.

"This may come as a shock to you, human, but I am a believer in the right of free will." Discord grabbed another handful of fries. "And it is one thing to resist your identity, and another thing entirely to accept and strive for it. You will make history, whether or not you're aware of doing so. I suppose I'm not really asking you to consciously go out and cause an uproar, but more like when you do - and you will - don't fight it. Go with the flow, as they say."

He closed his eyes and thought to himself for a few seconds. "Embrace your nature," he eventually said. "Wear it like a badge. Wield it like a weapon. Spend it like coin. Drink it like wine. Love it, if you wish. Hate it, if you prefer. But do not hide from it. Because in the end, you're only hiding from yourself."

I sat still for a moment, stunned by the weight of his words. "I suppose you found that out from personal experience?"

"No," he sadly stated. "My son taught me that."

"Oh." I set the burger down. Suddenly, I wasn't very hungry anymore. I felt...strange. "Here," I told him, pushing the sandwich away. "You can have that. If you want, I guess."

He cocked an eyebrow. "How...generous of you."

I felt it again, a jabbing sensation on my chest, right over my heart. I placed a hand over myself, suddenly feeling much weaker.

"Take my word, human. Don't fight it." Discord picked up the burger and took a big mouthful, a dreamy look crossing his face.

I glanced at him, bent over the table now. "Fight...what?" I managed to wheeze. The jabbing continued. It was so hard to talk again.

"Fate," he simply replied.

There was an almighty yank, and suddenly I was hurling upwards.

"Poke, poke, poke!"

"Disarray, would you stop that already!? Honestly, it's bad enough I'm cooped up in here again, but you aren't making it any easier for me or him. You've been doing that for ten minutes straight, cut it out already! He'll wake up when he wakes up!"

That was...Ginger's voice? Then I'm back in Equestria again. Good. At least I didn't get punted here again. I came on my own terms. Or maybe I never left? Agh! I feel a headache coming on!

"Poke."

There was that feeling on my forehead again.

"I swear to Celestia, if you do that one more time..."

"Oh, poo. You're such a grinch. 'As cuddly as a cactus, and as slippery as an eel,' as the saying goes. Have fun being all alone with the comatose mute, then. I have more important things to do as it is."

Disarray. That had to be Disarray. Where am I now? I feel...heavy. And tired. And sunburned.

"Like what? All you've been doing the past couple of days is randomly jumping out from hiding places and going 'Aboogaboogabooga!' to try and scare somepony!" Ginger again.

I heard Disarray sniff. "It worked on Tythus."

"Yeah, it worked once. The next time you tried it, you ended up in the tiny box of shame." Ginger sounded extremely vexed.

"...That pony really knows how to make a prison," Disarray grudgingly admitted. "Now, if you'll excuse me." There was a crack, and then a merciful silence.

"Ugh. Thank the Sun he's gone." There was a rustling noise, and a faint squeaking.

I tried mightily to open my eyes, but they wouldn't respond right. I was sluggish, and so damn heavy...this was like when I first woke up in Equestria. Hmmm. Just keep working on it, the muscles should work eventually. Become aware of myself. Yes. That's how I did it originally, wasn't it?

Come on, man. It's like riding bike. You never forget how to ride a bike.

But this isn't a bike...it's a little more complex than that.

Bah! To hell with logic. For now.

I began concentrating on different areas of my body, trying to feel them out, running an organic version of a computer restart. I started with the basics. Can I feel my toes? Check. I worked my way up my legs, twitching a sluggish muscle every once and a while. My tail shifted after a good few minutes of concentration. The pressure on my back told me that I was lying face-up, on a soft surface, possibly a mattress.

When I got to my chest, I gave pause. It felt different somehow. It felt...tight, and sensitive, as if I'd suffered a sunburn. The muscles refused to respond. I gave up after a while, and moved onto my shoulders. Check! Now down my arms. My biceps quivered as I regained conscious control. But when I moved past my elbows...

My forearms were strangely numb, and yet tingly, and cool. Like someone had shaved off my fur and rubbed me with spearmint soap. Past that, my paws. I flexed each finger, and they resisted me at every movement. I attempted to extend the claw in my right pointer finger, but could feel nothing occur. I mentally grumbled to myself and abandoned that part of my body.

Head, now. Face, first? Mouth. Let's see. Lips work, check. Eyebrows? Wiggle-wiggle-wiggle. Oh, hell yeah, those work. Nose. Sniff-sniff. Hmmm. I smell antiseptic, freshly washed sheets, soap, Ginger, faintly Daring, Disarray, and a plethora of other unfamiliar scents. Okay. Eyes, now. Time to wake up, man.

I concentrated, and directed my consciousness towards my eyelids. It felt like they were welded shut, such was their weight. I focused as hard as I could, and, like Atlas lifting the globe, the burden was slowly brought upwards. A bright crack of light filled my gaze, white at first, but then fading to a creamy sort of golden-yellow. I was staring at a ceiling. There was a stream of light on it, coming in from a window that was out of my view. It looked like sunlight, of an orange-ish quality that signaled the end of the day.

I blinked.

...

...System check complete.

...Standby for reboot in: 3...

2...

1...

...All systems online. Reboot complete!

I inhaled deeply through my mouth, feeling the strange tightness in my chest increase, and then fade, as I exhaled a powerful, long blast of air from my nose. I rolled my neck, and the joints popped loudly. Oh, yeah. That's the goods, right there.

I'm back, bitches.

The rustling noise to my side occurred again. "Echo?" I heard Ginger asked. I turned my head to the sound of her voice, and finally observed where I was.

This was the infirmary at the barracks, I recalled. I was lying on one of those nice beds kept there, Ginger was on another one next to me, on her side. There were a few bandages around the left part of her face, as well as a heavy wrapping around her midsection. Her horn was shrouded with a bag of ice, of all things.

"You're awake," she said dourly. "Took you long enough. It's almost been four days, now."

F-four whole days!?

I attempted to raise my arms up to respond. A sudden stinging sensation erupted in my forearms, and aloud clunk was heard as they met an abrupt resistance only a few inches up. I looked down at myself.

...Well, shit.

My chest was wrapped in layers of gauze down to my belly, and wet, pale azure stains seeped through the material. My arms, were encased in similar tubes of blue liquid completely past the elbow. I gazed in them so see my forearms completely devoid of fur, instead covered in a thick layer of warped scar tissue. Yeesh. The tubes were bolted to bed, for some reason. I strained against them, trying to get out somehow, frustrated that I'd been bound. They barely moved, so weak I was.

"Hey-hey-hey! Stop that!" barked Ginger. "What do you think you're doing?'

I froze, glancing down at the tubes again and looked at her imploringly as I jerked at them again. "You want the tanks off?"

I nodded. I couldn't communicate if my arms and paws were bound. I may be mute, but I have a way to speak, damnit, and I want it back!

"Too bad," said Ginger. "Doctor's orders. You got roasted, Echo. First, second, and third degree burns to your chest and arms. They had to operate on your paws, or something. Those tanks you're wearing have been repairing the damage as fast as medically possible. Taking 'em off would be a pretty stupid move, Echo. You aren't stupid. Leave them."

I glared at her. Weren't you the one doing the burning? I thought to myself.

She seemed to get the message, and had the decency to look somewhat guilty. "Don't give me that. You asked me for it. Look. Those tanks are filled with an aloe healing salve. Your arm burns should be better in another few days, and the ones on your chest have been getting regular treatments with more of the same. Doc said the bandages come off tomorrow morning."

Doc? We had a doctor at the barracks? Must be one of the reinforcements - there weren't any really qualified physicians among the Wethoof group. Basic medical knowledge was a requisite to join the guard (me being the exclusion - I didn't volunteer), but anything besides a battlefield patch-up was out of their league.

Wonderful. So that meant I was trapped here for my own good. I was bound to a bed, at that. I mentally chuckled. Wasn't the first time I'd woken up like this. With my luck, wouldn't be the last.

Las Vegas. An explanation in itself. Shit happens there.

There was nothing to do now but try and keep still. If it was the waiting game that had to be played, then the waiting game will be played. I closed my eyes and sank my head back down into a pillow I hadn't noticed before. At the soft caress of the bedding, I reminded myself that I'd just been sleeping. For four whole days, apparently. My body still felt exhausted, but my brain was working overtime.

"What happened on the ship..." Ginger was saying. When had I gone off on a tangent? Not important now. "Did you have any idea what you were doing?"

I nodded as best as I could.

Mosspaw had said it himself. One did not have to kill an alpha to take their place, merely defeat them. I had surrendered, forfeiting my claim, and leaving Ahuitzotl (who'd taken the role from Frost) as sole leader of the pack...which consisted of myself, him, and Ginger, due to her bloodline. When she had picked up the spear, she'd issued her own challenge - and won.

Technically, this meant that she was my alpha. I didn't know exactly what that entailed due to my unfamiliarity with diamond dog culture, but nevertheless, she was in charge of our pack...all of its two members.

Ginger sighed and closed her eye. "I never wanted this," she said. "This, of all things. I still hate your kind, Echo, do you know that? Every time I see you, I just..." she trailed off. Ginger didn't say anything for a good while.

"When Mosspaw showed up, for a brief second, I almost lost it." Ouch. Well, at least she's being honest. "I don't hate you, though. You're all right, I guess. You're different. I just hate what you are. So, don't take it personally, I guess." She snorted with derision. "And now, thanks to you, I'm the bucking alpha of the pack that was responsible for destroying my family." Her eye flicked open, her gaze as sharp and biting as a razor. "You've all but forced me to become the very thing I hate. I will never forgive you for this," she hissed softly. "But...I should thank you, as well."

My ears, formerly laid back flush to my skull, perked up in curiosity.

"I'm going to lead this pack, Echo. But I'm going to do it better than any diamond dog ever has. I'm going to do it my way. I'm going to take us all the way to the top, where the real alphas are. Canius. Rover. Tauro Rex. Blakwulf. Fenrir. Dottedheart. Shazza. The Great Dane. I'm going to take them down. All of them. And when there's nopony left, it'll just be me, the alpha of alphas. A Sirius. I'm going to change the packs forever, Echo, so that what happened to me will never happen again. And as my beta, you're going to help me. You owe me that much for putting me in this role."

...It really sucks when a good plan backfires in your face, doesn't it. And more importantly, what the fuck is a beta?

Ginger must have seen my confusion. She rolled her eyes. "What? There's only two of us, so by default, you're second in command."

Just when I think I'm out...they pull me back in.

Ginger snickered, somewhat spitefully. "Don't get your tail in a twist. This won't be for a long time. We need to get far more members in this pack, and we've got nothing but time. I'm in no rush for this." She grimaced. "Neither are you, if your reaction is anything to go by. And besides, we've got Equestria to explore before we find a place for a den."

My eyes widened at this, and I gave a her a suspicious look. Since when was she coming with? How did she even know about that? I don't remember telling her.

"Daring Do gave me the go-ahead, after I explained our situation. We've been in here for a few days, you know. Had some time to chat about...some things." Ginger pointed a hoof around her head to the cot behind her. "She was in here while her wing was healing. Released yesterday afternoon, actually. Said something about going back to her treehouse for supplies and stuff. Doc was overjoyed - that mare has a tongue sharper than arcanite." Ginger snorted. "Probably why we've gotten along so well."

I continued to suspiciously glare at her.

Ginger let her head sink into her pillow. "A pack sticks together, Echo. I'm coming with, and it's your own damn fault. Besides, there's nothing for me here anymore, now that..." she trailed off, her eye clouding over for a moment. She suddenly shook herself, as if shaking off water. When she spoke again, her voice was tight and controlled. "Now that I've got nopony to take care of here in Wethoof. I resigned from the guard, as well. Coconut, too, so I heard. You've...missed a lot."

I rolled my eyes. Of course I missed a lot - I've been comatose for days!

Ginger didn't say much after that. I didn't blame her. She'd lost...well, pretty much everything. And it wasn't like I could ask her any questions, incapacitated as I was.

But just lying there...it was kind of nice. Nobody asking me for help, nobody bothering me. I enjoyed solitude and the peace it brought. Call me an introvert, but I'd take being alone over being at a party any day.

Of course, when one isn't doing anything else, one begins to think.

The dream (or whatever it was) was still vivid to me. My leg still throbbed where the fork had gone in, although there was no injury. Daring's compass was actually on a bedside table, not around my neck. The bootlace that had bound it to me had been burned away.

I wasn't sure how I felt about that. The bootlace had saved my life. It was partially responsible for introducing Daring Do and myself.

Ah...and there it is. Daring Do...

The events on the ship were still somewhat muddled. But the instant I'd spent with her on the icy decks were still quite vivid. I fancied that I could still feel the sensation of her lips pressed against my forehead if I tried hard enough. And yet...what had been in that kiss? I wasn't sure. But I'd liked it.

Maybe. Maybe there was something that could happen between us.

Maybe there already was?

The sunlight eventually faded away. Ginger fell asleep almost as soon as it did so. With the rising of the moon, a different sort of light bled into the infirmary. I had nothing to do but lie there and think.

My body was a wreck. Even with the absurdly effective Equestrian health care, I doubted if I would ever be as strong as before. My arms...well, let's just say skin isn't supposed to look like that.

Tomorrow was going to be eventful indeed...no doubt I'd end up hearing what happened after the battle. There'd be ponies coming in to speak with me, now that I was awake. Somehow, I'd have to talk to Daring. But I'd find a way. I knew I would. But things would be different from now on. Very different.

Despite my best intentions, everypony seemed to want a piece of me. Discord, Daring Do, Ginger Snap, Captain Tythus...I hoped I wouldn't end up pulled to pieces.

Aw, hell.

Just go with the flow.

When I finally fell asleep, Luna's moon had almost finished sailing across the sea of stars.

That night, I did not dream. There was only floating in a deep, blissful void.

...But I couldn't help but shake the feeling that something was there with me.

Author: Just when I thought I'd seen it all... this happens.

(23) Burying Bones

The bandages came off easily enough, revealing the results of several days worth of treatments.

I barely noticed.

"Not bad," Doctor Triage muttered to himself as he brushed a hoof across a newly-exposed section of my chest. "Skin's healed up nicely, and the fur's already growing back. Remarkable. Diamond dogs are quite resilient, yes? Quite an interesting bone structure. The marrow is much denser, resulting in a heavier mass...and yet somehow thrice as many times durable as an earth pony bone. Perhaps something to do with a high-metal diet, yes? There we are..."

I blankly nodded from where I was propped up in the bed, arms still bound to the sides. My chest looked very smooth and pale underneath all that fur. A small coating of silky hairs was beginning to cover what had been burned away. I was somewhat unnerved to discover that I seemed to have two extra pairs of nipples. The lack of fur covering myself had revealed them at regular intervals down my chest. I felt strangely embarrassed about that, although nothing was ever said about it.

Triage was a pale yellow earth pony. He had no mane that I could see, as the top of his head was covered in a surgical bandanna emblazoned with a red cross. And somehow, he was extremely adept with his hooves, despite an obvious lack of fingers.

"...Well, everything checks out fine so far," Triage was saying. "Tomorrow, I'll be coming back to get those tanks off you," he said, jerking his head at the tubes. "Try to take it easy, you might have strong bones, but they are by no means fireproof, of all things." He snorted. "The regrowth solution was put to the test, my furry friend. Bones are hard to regenerate, so you should be feeling very weak until treatments are done." With that, the good doctor left the infirmary.

I glance down at the tanks, and the warped appendages contained within.

We had to remove them. My mind is still having trouble wrapping itself around it.

What do I do now?

...

I need to do SOMETHING.

My thought process blanks. My subconscious takes the helm.

I hunched myself over and furiously began to bite through the metal holding me down. The weird, bread-like taste filled my mouth as I wrenched a good chunk away and chewed it to pieces, the metal somehow softening in my mouth to a manageable texture. I swallowed it hungrily. Be it some biological adaptation or magic, I wasn't complaining.

Ginger, still sleeping in the bed next to me, stirred.

I paused, counting out the seconds.

She did this to you.

Shut up. You've nobody to blame but yourself. You asked for it.

I shook my head and cleared away the argument. It doesn't matter, anyway.

Once I reached fifteen, her breathing resumed a regular pattern. I grunted to myself and continued gnawing away. Abruptly, my left arm broke free, still encased in its tube. I moved the limb around, wincing as the muscles were used for the first time in days. I held it up to my face for a closer look, peering into the murky blue substance that was contained within.

The burns...too serious...

The flesh from my elbow, down all the way to the tips of my fingers was patchy and mottled. It was heavy scar tissue, looking more the cooling lava one finds pouring from the Hawaiian volcano known as Mauna Loa. I frowned at this. No fur growing back over that. A few attempts at flexing my paw were somewhat fruitful. It still felt very sluggish, but I could move my fingers again, at least.

With a sigh, I continued onto the other arm, freeing that one with more ease than the first. The small meal reminded me how hungry I was. Voracious, even. Hunger was no stranger to me. I could bear it with ease. I had, after all, lived like a hermit, contentedly alone in my rainy city. The rule was - if I didn't need it, I didn't buy it. I was such a practical bastard...

No. What had driven me from rest was the soft hiss of rain coming from outside. Weather has that effect on me. I was consumed by an almost unbearable urge to feel it on my skin, to spatter off my nose and drip off my tail. Being cooped up and bed-ridden had left me feeling dirty.

On top of that, I felt...broken.

I had to do SOMETHING.

A complete success, besides. Full recovery if you play your cards right...

However, I wasn't supposed to be up for another day or so. I had literally been bound to my bed, and if caught up and about, I assumed that I'd be put right back. That was the reason I had to be sly about this. You'll just sneak out, stand in the rain for just a few minutes, and get back in, I thought to myself.

What could possibly go wro-

NO! DON'T YOU DARE FINISH THAT SENTENCE!

Heh-heh. Close one.

You can thank me later.

With catastrophe averted, I swung myself out of bed and settled onto my hind legs. My two other limbs were surrounded with glass tubes, and were unusable for walking. Thankfully, I was no stranger to being bipedal.

I wriggled my toes on the floor and unlocked my rear claws. They sank into the surface with ease, before I sheathed them. At least those work, eh?

There was...some kind of magical reaction...

A window was above my bed. It would do for a suitable escape route. I approached it and awkwardly attempted to unlock it using my mouth, as my fingers were incapacitated. The stubborn lock defied me, however.

Not to be defeated, I determined that I'd have to use my lower digits. Carefully maneuvering myself so that my back was facing the window, I planted my tube-encased forearms on the floor and wearily heaved myself into a handstand, using my legs to walk my lower half up the window until my right paw was in striking distance of the lock. My arms shook from the effort, but held.

With a great deal of concentration the lock finally clicked open. I returned to my rear paws and slowly nudged the window open, casting another wary glance at the sleeping form of Ginger. The sleeping mare rolled over, dead to the world. She breathed something into the mattress, something I couldn't hear. A contented smile came over her face, and one of her rear legs kicked a little. "I missed you, too..."

I gritted my teeth as a surge of guilt knotted my stomach. I left her to enjoy her dream.

She deserves some happiness, at the very least.

Some time later, I found myself sitting on the small hill out behind the barracks. The grass was cool on my fur, and the rain was refreshing as well. It was warm, a real tropical downpour. It went pip-pap-pip across my shoulders, and tink-tonk-tink on the tubes. It sounded like a musical instrument, in its own way.

It was so peaceful out here. It was just me, the ground, and the cloudy sky.

The rain tasted fresh. Pure. Unsullied by taint of any kind. It was a rare thing to enjoy water of this quality where I'd lived before. The city water tasted unpleasantly like metal (as it would taste to a human), and the rain that often fell there had to fall through smog and other fumes. Here? You could probably drink puddle-water straight from a sinkhole in a graveyard and it'd still taste like something melted off a mountain glacier.

I could see nopony outside. The steady rain had driven most indoors, it seemed. I wondered if this storm was natural or pony-produced. Wethoof had a curious relationship with the weather. They lacked enough pegasi to force the local weather to their will, so they usually just shaped what they had, augmenting or weakening incoming wild cloud banks as they saw fit.

In the distance, through the haze of falling water, I could see that the great wall encircling the town had begun to be demolished. The western side had vanished, and I could see an enormous pile of lumber stacked by the northern watchtower. Wethoof was returning to the way it had been. Back when the rainforest grew right to the edge of town, if the glimpses I'd seen in Ginger's memory were accurate.

Curiously, though, I could see more ships than had been here before. Moored to the watchtower at different heights were five ships, now. The two newcomers were smaller than the mighty Benevolent Mercy and her sleek daughters. These were rounder, fatter ships, with ornamented envelopes and no noticeable gunports. Traders, I assumed. With all the valuable lumber suddenly available, it was no surprise that a few enterprising captains had risked the wild southern skies for a rich hold of rainforest wood.

Things were looking up for Wethoof, indeed. The battle would have put this place on the map. Tourists would come to stop and gawk at the skeletons of the hydras, much like how humans pondered over the bones of the dinosaurs, 65 million years dead and yet still capturing imaginations today.

Tink-tonk-tink!

How close I had come to becoming a fossil myself...how very close, indeed.

I shuddered.

The tubes. I glanced down at them again. A well of frustration surged forth. The pale skin within seemed to glow white, such was its contrast to the murky liquid.

I mentally stomped a foot down onto the uprising emotions. No. Keep calm, I remind myself. You haven't earned that right.

The wellspring ignored me. It pushed back, hard. Arriving in Equestria, a new body, the stresses of battle, the strain I'd put myself through to maintain my sanguine facade, and now...this. It all caught up to me, and came to the very edge of blowing the lid right off my mental cap.

A tiny stream spurted out from beneath the foot, so great was the pressure. Just a little. But enough.

CRASH!

Faster than I though possible, my arms swung up, smashing the two glass tubes together in an almighty explosion of glass and liquid.

My paws...my arms...they tingled in the air, with a funny sort of sensation. It was almost painful, how sensitive the skin was. Heavy scarring covered very inch from the elbows down. No fur.

The fingertips were round and smooth. The familiar black nubs of material were gone, as if they never existed.

No claws.

Just...gone.

They looked hideous. I closed my eyes and buried my paws into the soft ground by my sides.

Even the dirt felt funny.

The tide of anger receded back to the depths, back where it belonged. I stuffed it down to the bottom of a black chest and padlock the thing with wrought-iron chains. I'd never come this close before. Ever. A gentleman never loses his temper. Stiff upper lip and all that.

A blip of motion out the corner of my eyes registered through the haze of weather. The air pulsed as a pair of wings flapped again and folded. I didn't need to turn, I realized with some surprise, to need to identify her. The scent was comfortingly familiar. Even her breathing, a tinge raspy but always steady, was recognizable.

"Hey! Glad to see you're finally awake."

Daring Do trotted over next to me and sat down by my side. Wings stretched outwards, catching the downpour on dusky tan feathers that seemed to turn light brown with moisture. I watched as the water pitter-pattered off her pith helmet.

For a good while, we just laid like that, side by side, soaking in the rain. I was in no hurry to do much of anything, and it wasn't like I could carry a conversation at the time.

Daring finally broke the ambiance of the storm. "They're looking for you, you know." She glanced at me with concern.

I nodded.

"You'll come back with me, then?"

I gave another nod.

There was a pause. I watched the stormy clouds for a while, blinking rapidly whenever a drop hit my eyes.

"I've always sort of wondered why you like weather like this so much," she eventually said. "I think I can see it now. This is like washing yourself off, isn't it? Except it's not dirt you're cleaning."

I deeply sighed and nodded again.

"You know, it's funny. About two months ago, I was relaxing in my treehouse, not a care in the world besides which ruin I'm going to hit next. And then you come along...and everything gets turned upside-down. Now, I'm poised to begin the greatest expedition in living memory. Well, except for the Princesses, I guess." She flopped over onto her back, looking up at the sky. "Can you imagine it? We're going to see everything! One last, great adventure. To beat all the others."

I perked my ears up at her, indicating my surprise at this.

She laughed. "Well, yeah. I'm not exactly getting any younger, Echo." She flicked a hoof through her mane, black and silver and...gray. "And this journey is going to take a long, long time. By the time we finish, I figure I'll be too old to do much else. I'll retire somewhere. An island, maybe. Yeah, I could buy an island." She trailed off, lost in thought.

Daring Do...getting old? The notion seems preposterous. And yet, there is some truth. She's been at this for over a decade, after all. Nobody's golden years last forever. I'd never asked her her how old she was (a gentleman never asks, a lady never tells), but for a pony, I'd put her around middle-aged. That doesn't bother me in the slightest, though. I'd always gotten along well the more mature women.

"Can I see them?"

The question was so blunt that I was momentarily confused.

"Your paws. I saw them when you were on the table...well, what was left of them." Daring winced. "And seeing how you've completely destroyed the tanks, why not? Say, how did you get out of the bed, anyway? I thought those things were bolted to the sides."

I gave a halfhearted, wolfish grin to the clouds, flashing my teeth.

She laughed. "Huh, that figures. So, can I see 'em?"

I hesitated, unwilling to show her. "Oh, pfft," she chuckled softly, "I'm no spring filly. I've seen plenty in my days. You've got nothing to be ashamed of. Show me, please."

Very slowly, I pulled my paws out of the ground and held them up. Daring gave a low whistle. I could see her eyes widen in shock at the sight. Abashed, I quickly tucked them to my sides and rolled away. Immediately, a hoof planted itself on my shoulder and rolled me right back over. I looked up into magenta eyes, gazing at me with a flat expression, as if to say, Seriously? You did NOT just do that. You know better. I sheepishly held out my paws again.

The rain, by this time, had cleared away the salve and the dirt. Daring looked at them again, with wide eyes. What I missed, last time, though, is that there was no fear or disgust in them. Only curiosity. "How do they feel?" she asked softly. She pressed one with a hoof. I flinch at the touch, still sensitive, but hold it where it is. I rolled my wrists and deftly clenched a fist. "Better, huh?" She pushed my fingers around, studying how the joints moved and flexed.

I weakly nod, leaning back into the ground and closing my eyes.

"You are a very silly diamond dog, Echo," she finally sighed.

She was right, of course. She's always right.

Remember that, fellas. Women: even when they're wrong...they're still right. Or else.

Daring stood up and shook out her feathers. "Come on. We should get out of the rain. I brought some gems back from the treehouse today. You feeling like some sapphires?" she half-sings it.

My stomach rumbled and I sat up immediately, tail thumping the ground.

"Hah! Let's go, big guy."

"Om-nom-nom!"

I stuffed another pawful of gems into my mouth, furiously crunching and tasting and trying to swallow, all at the same time. I constantly kept choking, I was eating so fast, but I didn't really care at that point, so great was my hunger.

"And where exactly did you find him?" Ginger asked, reiterating the question running through the minds of everypony present in the infirmary.

Daring shrugged. "Out back. Enjoying the weather."

"But it's raining."

I stupidly grinned from where I was sitting on my cot, and point a finger in the air. Exactly! A couple half-chewed sapphires fell out of my mouth, which I awkwardly stuffed back where they belong.

Captain Tythus rubbed his face with a hoof. "We had several teams covering the entire town, and he was behind the barracks the whole time?"

"Apparently," Ginger muttered. She's been cleared of her own bandages, and is set to leave the infirmary.

Doctor Triage looks extremely miffed. "It's a good thing you brought him back, Miss Do. We can't finish treatments without a patient. Very...expensive...treatments. With expensive equipment." He pointedly glared at me.

I gave him the finger, and continue to contentedly eat.

"Don't think he wants it, Doc," said Daring.

I nodded vigorously.

"Wha...? But..." Triage sputtered. "I cannot allow this! As a medical officer, it is my duty to care for the wounded Guard!"

"Echo's not in the Guard anymore. His debt's been paid." Tythus gave me a wink. "If he wants to abandon treatment, that's his choice."

I returned his wink. "But before you leave, I have a few things to debrief you on. I'll be in my office. You'll be free to leave Wethoof on the morrow, pending some paperwork. Triage, if you'll come with me, I believe your services are needed elsewhere." The captain struck a crisp salute and trotted out. Triage grumbled something under his breath and followed him.

Ginger awkwardly stomped her hooves on the ground in the silence that follows. "So..." she began. "There's...a, um...service. Tonight. A memorial. At the western wall. Er, where it used to be. I'll be in it. So..." she trailed off.

Daring grinned at her maliciously. "What was that, sweetie? Sorry, can't hear you over the sound of poor social skills."

Ginger scowled.

I seized into a fit of silent snickering.

"WouldyoupleasecomewithmeIcan'tdothisalone!" It came out in a single blurt. Ginger actually looked ashamed that she said it.

Daring glanced over at me. I gave her two thumbs up, then look down at my paws and wince, before putting them behind my back.

"Anything for a friend," Daring said as she turns back to the mare.

Ginger looked taken aback for a moment, then nodded in confirmation, accompanied by a nervous swallow. Without another word, she left.

Daring made to leave as well. "You should go and see the captain, now. I'll be getting some things together at the inn. Head over when everything is wrapped up here, 'mkay?"

I nodded again and glance down to stuff another pawful of sapphires into my mouth. So good! When I look up again, she's right in front of me. Daring leans forward and pecks me on the cheek, before spinning around and sashaying away, her tail flicking the tip of my nose. She looked back and winks at me. "Try not to take to long." The doors closed behind her. Never before has the sound of squeaky hinges graced my ears in such a beautiful manner.

Whump!

I fell off the edge of the bed, completely paralyzed. Except for my mouth, which is stretched into the biggest smile I've ever worn.

"I've always believed in saving judgement for a rainy day," Tythus said as he reclined in his chair. We were in his office. The stallion bust in the corner was outfitted with his armor again, several new dents and scrapes shining brightly on the otherwise immaculately polished metal hide. "And wouldn't you know, it's raining today."

I shuffled awkwardly from where I sat across from the desk.

He grinned at me. "Relax, Echo. Now. On behalf of Wethoof, and the Equestrian Guard, I'd like to thank you for your services. It was no small feat, what you or your comrades accomplished. That deserves a reward, don't you think?"

My eyes followed him as he trotted over to his cot and reached under it, removing a large canvas bundle. The stallion telekinetically moved it to the desk, where it drops with a loud, muffled clatter. "Open it up," he ordered. "This is from Bellows and I, as well as Mayor Baritone."

Mayor? I looked at him with surprise.

"Ah. Yes. I'd forgotten, you've been out for a few days. Wethoof held an election immediately after the battle. Our mutual acquaintance seemed to be very popular. Baritone was pleasantly surprised, to say the least. Time will tell to see if he can lead, though. I have to admit, he's got some big horseshoes to fill." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "So does Sparky, for that matter."

I implored him to continue with a paw. Once again, I noticed how freaky it looks and awkwardly shove my paws out of sight.

"I've chosen her as my replacement." Tythus opened up a drawer in his desk and pulled out a scroll, which he waved around a little. A broken seal was on it, similar to the one I'd seem him open before. "Princess Celestia herself has ordered that a small garrison will be stationed in Wethoof, full time. Something like the hydras will never happen around here again. And seeing as I was pulled out retirement for this..." he sighed wistfully, "a replacement is needed for when I leave. I'll be decommissioned again when I return to Canterlot for debriefing. I did get a promotion out if it, though. I'll be hanging my armor up as Major Tythus, at least. Ah! But where was I? Open the bag, please."

I untied the knot around the top and dumped the contents out onto the desk with a clatter.

Whoa...

I lifted up the first object. It looked like a modified version of a duster, of a dark green, but minus a collar. Instead, a wide hood was stitched onto place. There were no sleeves, true to diamond dog fashion tastes. I tossed it on, and threw the hood up. My ears smoothly slipped through pre-cut slits. I patted the sides, admiring the thick, tough, but soft texture. There's even a hole for my tail to poke through! Swag!

"You like it? Spidersilk. Bellows whipped it up when he heard about your toga and armor getting...incinerated," Tythus finished a bit lamely. "There's more from him, too." He pushed a few more things towards me.

More armor, but only bracers. A thick strip of spidersilk; a light brown. It goes around my waist over the duster robe, like a corsair sash. The bracers slide on smoothly. They were made of thick, dark metal that had been hammered and compressed a hundred times over. I looked at them for a long while. For an unknown reason, I'm glad that's all the armor there is. Still, they leave an unpleasant sensation on my scarred forearms. I took them off and slid them into some pockets in the duster.

Tythus coughed politely, snapping my out of my brooding. "Mayor Baritone has left his reward outside of Miss Do's temporary residence, as we'd nowhere else to put it. I expect you'll see it when you depart. Now, onto another pressing matter..." He reached under his desk again and pulled out a familiar object.

The black gem shimmered weirdly, seemingly sucking up all the light it touches. Tythus holds it in one hoof. "Do you know what this is?" he asked.

I shook my head, warily watching the shadowy crystal as if it might explode.

He sighed. "Hmm. That makes two of us, then. I'll be presenting this to the Princess in my report. I'm sure she'll know what to do with it." He put the gem away. "It's been an honor serving with you, Echo."

He saluted.

Unwilling to have to put my paws so close to my face, I choose to respectfully bow instead.

...It's bigger on the inside.

Sweet.

Celestia.

It was about the length of a large pickup truck. Six wide wooden wheels, three a side, gleam with brass finishing, resting easily on the wooden decks of Wethoof. The artfully painted compass rose on the side leaves little doubt to its purpose. It reminds me of The Great and Powerful Trixie's stagecoach, but that hunk of junk pales in comparison to this beast. A monstrous wagon, really, but to me it might as well be a motherfucking Bugatti.

And it's bigger on the inside. Did I mention that?

I opened the door and peer inside at the dimensional impossibility. The interior is as large as common room, longer lengthwise than width wise. There are even small rooms along the walls, three a side, more than enough for all of us. In the middle, several cushions are scattered around a metal fire pit. The small grating in the ceiling assures that any smoke will be well ventilated. Everything smells like fresh wood and adventure.

Gods, I love that smell.

Daring Do shared my excitement. "Would you look at this thing?" she exclaimed as she poked her head in around my side. "This is...unbelievable! We'll be traveling in style. Where did Tythus and Baritone even find time to get this built?"

I shrugged, still in a daze from seeing it for the first time.

"Oh, you know, with a little help from a few talented helpers," Disarray's voice said, as one of the cushions explodes into a shower of feathers, revealing the figure of a stormy gray alicorn. "I believe my cousins supplied a helping hoof in the matter. Consider it a gift to you all for your assistance in the battle." He pointed a hoof at one of the doors. "Also, dibs on that room."

Daring's eybrows shot up. "You came back. I haven't seen you for days!"

Disarray rolled his eyes. "Of course I came back, I always come back. Something wrong with that? I'm like a bad fart in an elevator, you just can't get rid of me." He rubbed his chin absently with a hoof. "Also, my handsome body might be a veritable force of nature, but I do need a place to rest my weary head every now and then. Seeing as I'm more or less your acting mascot, I might as well have a room." He trotted over to the door he chose and opened it, looking inside for a moment before turning back to us. "I'm thinking of installing a bunk bed. There will be so much room for activities!" He laughed in delight, clopping his hooves together.

"Hmmm. As long as we're choosing rooms..." Daring moved off to investigate behind another door, leaving me and Disarray alone.

The hybrid collapsed onto a cushion and spreads his hooves at me. "Welcome back, Fluffy. It's good to see you up and about. I expect you're still feeling a little down in the dumps after losing your claws?"

I hid my paws inside the duster.

He chuckled at me. "My, my, how the mighty have fallen. Tell you what, though, I can give them back to you, in a way."

My ears pricked up. I was at his side in a heartbeat. He chuckled again and reached inside his robe, before pulling out a strange object, about six to eight inches long, black, and somewhat curved. Along one side, I could see the ambient light reflected off a razor sharp edge. He hoofed it to me, somewhat gingerly.

"This is the only claw that wasn't destroyed by the fire," Disarray said. "I suppose the loss is somewhat my fault, you see. Thanks to the fact that your claws contained my raw magical essence, they reacted quite...chaotically...to the magical fire that our local hothead threw at you. Ironically, if they hadn't been charged in that way, they'd have survived." He snorted to himself. "I've re-absorbed the essence that was left in this one, as I was in a great need of some spare power after the battle, so it's not much use now except for a sharp edge."

I held the claw in my right paw. It's the weirdest feeling in the world, holding a detached piece of yourself. Imagine having your leg cut off, and being presented with the bones that were in it a few days later.

Yeah. Pretty much like that.

Somewhat nauseated, I slid the claw into my sash and left Disarray there.

Anxious to distract myself, I took another walk around the outside, examining it closely. In the front, there's a seat, much like for a driver of a carriage. The whole apparatus for a harness is there, even reins, for some reason. This would have to be pulled. But...it looks different. The harness doesn't look like it will fit a pony correctly, even one with the muscular stature of Coconut, who was currently trying to put it on.

"Oy! What's the deal? Collar won't fit!" he grumbled, straining to get himself into a curious harness that looks like a cross between Big Macintosh's work collar and a backpack that straps over the shoulders and around the stomach. I helped him out of it, and he wriggled out from underneath.

"It's not supposed to fit you," Ginger put in from where she was resting on the porch of the tavern. "It's supposed to fit him." She pointed a hoof at me.

...wait, what?

Coconut scratched his head. "A wagon that ain't pony-powered? That just doesn't make sense."

Ginger stretched and laid her head in her forelegs. "I recognize that type of harness. The Greenclaws used ones like it to haul carts of gems. Have Echo try it on if you don't believe me."

I immediately found myself bodily thrown into position, and Coconut threw the contraption over my neck. Surprisingly, it fits! Snug, too. "Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle. Try pullin' it!" He moved back a couple paces to watch, looking at me expectantly.

"What's going on out here?" Daring Do asked as she alit onto the driver's seat of the stagecoach. She must have finished inspecting the interior.

"Echo's going to prove me right, that's what," Ginger grumbled from the porch.

Disarray popped into existence a few feet away from Coconut, who jumped away, surprised. "Hey, Daring!" he called. "Nice ride. Take it off any sweet jumps?"

Daring ignored the jibe. "Well, he is going be pulling it, might as well get a feel for it before we leave." Daring tapped her chin thoughtfully. "But don't strain yourself. You won't be back up to full strength for a while, and we've got nothing but time to kill. I mean, we could get a regular collar for Coconut to use, in the meantime..."

Coconut puffed out his chest and tried very poorly to look heroic. "It'd be me pleasure ta give it a shot! A stallion's gotta do what a stallion's gotta do."

On the porch, Ginger stifled a snicker.

I looked back at the huge stagecoach in disbelief. I still felt weak and frail, and they expect me to pull this hulking beast? Maybe when I recover...

Daring Do looked at me expectantly from her perch in the seat. Ah, hell. Might as well be a good sport and give it a shot.

With a grunt, I threw myself forward into the harness. The leads tightened behind me. My rear claws dug into the wooden decking of the platform. The whole thing creaked and jerked forward a several feet, but then I ran out of steam and stagger to a halt, wheezing loudly.

Coconut stepped up and pried the harness off me. "Not bad, mate. Not bad at all. Guess I'll be fillin' in while you get back on yer hooves. Er, paws. My bad." He clapped me on the back. I winced and rub where his hoof landed, still breathing hard and somewhat ashamed of my weakness.

Daring hopped off the stagecoach, barely making a noise as she gracefully landed on the deck. "Well, with that settled, I propose that we leave in three days We've got supplies to pack, and Echo needs to decide where our first stop will be."

"That," Ginger said, "and we have some respects to pay tonight."

One of the Benevolent Mercy's former escorts floated serenely over the assembly. She'd been repainted with dark reds and browns, and great slabs of armor plating haphazardly have been bolted to her hull, turning it into an Equestrian version of an ironclad. The envelope had been emblazoned with the symbol of a black, winged sword on a blood-red field. At the bridge, the newly dubbed Captain Griffin the gryphon can be seen barking orders to the crew of his new vessel.

The ship, renamed the Possibility, shuddered as gunports open up on one side and gleaming, oversized cannons stick their noses out into the night sky.

"Still can't believe he got a bucking ship, for Celestia's sake." A nearby gaurd whispered, stomping his hoof. "They're pirates! And Tythus gives them a ship!"

"Aw, don't be complaining," another one said. "Without them, the townsponies would have been whisked away to who knows where, and the old Mayor would be doing who knows what to them. Besides, I heard they're bound for Gryphonic skies, in the far North, away from Equestria. Good riddance, I say. Let them deal with the pirates."

Daring Do, sitting next to me on the fledgling grass, shushed them into silence. Coconut, on her far side, chuckled softly.

The night was warm and humid, but a stiff breeze coming up from the West kept the crowd refreshed. The Guard was out in full force, as well as the entire population of the town.

I took another glance around my surroundings, still unable to believe how fast the area has changed.

This was the site of where the western wall once stood, where the hydras broke against the mighty wooden barricade and its surrounding embankments. The earthworks themselves are still there, already a young coat of grass growing over the scene. The three massive craters blown into the gauntlet were filled with the bodies of the slain hydras and covered with dirt. The decomposition of the corpses will help fuel the recovery of the rainforest as the behemoths return their nutrients to the earth.

Major Tythus stood on a wide raised platform, flanked by the newly promoted Captain Sparky, the newly elected Mayor Baritone, the alicorns, Borealis and his sister Australis, and standing off to the side, Ginger Snap. Tythus just began a speech in memory of those fallen in the battle and the ponies who were taken in the early days of the struggle, before the wall was raised.

I hardly paid attention.

It's funny, how things always work in cycles.

You're born.

You live.

You die.

You rot.

You're born again, as trees, flowers, plants, and other animals.

The circle of life.

Hakuna matata, I thought to myself. I've never feared death. That doesn't mean I want to die, mind you. But when my times comes (and it comes to all of us) I won't be troubled by it. The hereafter beckons with the promise of eternity.

But...in a small way, I think, nothing really ever dies.

Elements. The substance of the universe, which erupted forth from the genesis of existence and continue to be forged in the roaring hearts of stars. Made of the smallest of particles. At the atomic level, you never really die. In fact, every atom in your body could have been a part of another creature at one point, and in every other animal before them. In fact, your body may contain particles that have been traveling from being to being for millions of years. You might even have pieces of the planet inside of you, a drop of water that traveled from an Antarctic glacier, a pinch of iron that found its way from the mountains of Japan...

We're exactly the same, I conclude, at the most fundamental level. Every last one of us. Just arrangements of matter, forming and reforming as the cosmos continues its voyage down the river of time.

Does that make this significant? I asked myself. Does anything matter if we're all just stardust in the galactic winds?

Absolutely.

Our substance might be eternal, but the life binding it together is not. That alone makes it significant. Life is significant. Fighting, breathing, screaming, heaving, fucking, laughing, killing, thinking...living. All the good, all the bad, all the struggling...

Worth every Godsdamned moment of it.

I glanced down at my mangled forelimbs and grimaced.

It's just hard to remember that sometimes.

Meanwhile, Tythus wrapped up his speech to thunderous applause. "Without further ado, I present the Duke and Duchess Aurora, who have volunteered to assist our own Ginger Snap with the last rites..." He moved back to the Mayor and Captain. Duke and Duchess, huh? So that's what their titles are.

My eyebrows rose up in surprise at this, and the two dark alicorns stepped gracefully forward, standing on either side of Ginger. The mare had a stony face that would make a mountain's mother scold it for not being mountain-y enough. The crowd's applause waned off, soon replaced by an expectant hush.

Ginger, seemingly nonplussed by the awaiting crowd, slowly placed her goggles over her eyes. Her horn glowed for a second, before a pale wisp of green light floated off the tip and rocketed into the sky.

At her sides, Borealis and Aurora extended their powerful wings in one snap, so swiftly that a gust of wind can be seen caressing manes and fluttering helmet bristles for a hundred feet into the crowd.

In the sky, I heard Griffin scream a command. The Possibility's guns gleam in the starlight. At my side, Daring covers her head with her wings. "Plug your ears!" I heard her muffled voice from underneath the feathers.

I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding.

Kra-BOOOOOOOOM!

The airborne twenty-one gun salute shattered the stillness of the night, soon replaced by a low, soothing hum that permeates the air, the ground, even my bones seem to rattle along with it. It takes me a moment to realize what's going on.

Singing.

The ponies all around began to sing. There are no words, only a deep, throbbing harmony of voices.

The alicorns flapped into the night, and began to slowly circle the gathering, wingtips barely skimming the ears of some of the audience. From the darkness of their feathers, color began to stain the black sky. A soft aurora toke shape, a gentle tornado of all known colors spiraling up towards the heavens, a swirling vortex of ether and smoke.

The melody changed. The stallions began a mournful chorus, rumbling and seemingly making the air tremble. The mares rose up into a haunting scale that made my hackles rise. Daring added her voice to the ghostly choir, her usually rough tongue smoother than cream and softer than silk. It's undoubtedly the single most beautiful thing I've ever heard in my life. Her eyes were fixated on the sky and her wings ruffle by her sides.

I watched as Ginger's horn began to light up along the spiraling grooves, her mane rustling softly against the breeze like rouge flames. Then, she arched her back and reared skywards in one smooth motion, a stream of fire erupting forth into the empty space surrounded by the aurora.

The song increased in volume. The bass thunders and makes the earth tremble. It sounds like pure grief, yet restrained and tethered by stoicism. I felt like the sound is preventing itself from doing any more, holding itself back.

The treble wailed and crooned as though the moon had cracked in half. The notes spiderweb through the air, a sad scale of raw emotion.

Ginger whipped her head back and forth, and the lance of fire whirls about, swirling and...shaping?

I watched in disbelief as the emerald fireball assumed the form of a massive pony, slowly plodding through the sky, tethered by a thin cord of light to Ginger's horn. Her goggles reflected the light weirdly, making her look almost like she had eyes of pure colorful light.

One of the guards next to me began to cry, even as he sang.

Borealis and Australis continued to slowly bank around the gathering, trailing the colors of distant skies. Their voices, like musical instruments in their own right, joined the herd with benevolent serenity.

The fireball shifted again, this time becoming a unicorn - a mare. She danced through the sky, through the pulsing air.

The mourning hymn went through another soul-crushing melody. It felt like my heart was about to crumble from sheer sadness. I gasped and clutched my chest, falling back onto my haunches.

A proud pegasus stallion rose from the flickers of the now-vanishing unicorn like a phoenix, and spread wings of pure flame. I could feel the the warmth even from here. The fire changed again, almost alive, into an earth pony, who paws at the imaginary ground before proudly rearing, a mane of rippling light fluttering against the colorful backdrop.

It hit me, then.

These are the dead.

I felt weak. I toppled over onto my side as the song rose and fell around me as waves in the ocean, before managing to roll onto my back.

They're saying goodbye. This is the last time they walk among us.

The emotion was overwhelming. I dug my warped fingers into the ground as I braced against a surge of grief, so powerful that it makes me shake. Unbelievably, I opened my mouth to try and sing as well, though the sounds that issue forth are strangled and hoarse. It doesn't matter. As long as I can add anything to this...

I felt something wet on my face. I don't dare reach up to wipe it away, instead going through another series of silent convulsions. I'm crying? No...gentlemen don't cry. We don't show weakness...I don't show weakness.

Stiff upper lip, and all that.

...

But maybe just this once?

...

Something pressed onto my chest. Wrapping around me tight. It's Daring, singing her heart out as she slowly rocked me back and forth, her head pressed up against my neck as I shook with another wave of grief. Tears of her own were freely running down her face, although her eyes are tightly closed. Unable to fight the sound, the colors, the magic, my dam breaks for the first time in...years.

I wrapped my arms around her and squeeze her tight, just grateful for something to hold onto.

Or somepony.

Above, the fiery specters presented themselves one last time to their loved ones, before they fade away into the aurora. Stallions, mares, unicorns, pegasi, earth ponies...even a small filly graces the sky with her presence. Each one distinctively unique, each one a terrible loss.

But finally, finally, the music began to die into a whisper, many of the singers having broken down on their own.

The last pony left singing was a cinnamon-coated unicorn mare, with a fiery mane and black goggles covering her pretty green eyes. Streaks lined her face as tears leaked out from under the eyewear, but she kept on singing until she came to the final member of the dead.

A pegasus of soft, green fire, flying beautiful acrobatics in the sky, came down to land on the stage beside the unicorn. Ginger's horn finally sparked out. She's done.

The magical tether to the flaming specter shimmered away, but the mare remained for a split second more, to share a soft kiss with her beloved. They broke apart, and Ginger finally collapsed in grief.

The pegasus nuzzled her gently, before fading away into the night.

Three days later, we were ready to go.

(24) Into the Wild

It is a common misconception that the first steps of any journey are often the hardest ones to take.

I'd like to call bullshit on that one, if it pleases the court. They were the easiest ones I'd ever taken.

The few days of rest I had in Wethoof before we departed were comparable only to those I spent at the treehouse. I filled the time with familiarizing myself with our new ride (the six-wheeled Equestrian version of a monster truck, BOOYAH!), perusing many of the maps and documents that Daring had brought back, and generally taking it easy.

We hadn't decided on a name for our transport yet, although we defiantly each had our own suggestions as to what it should be. It went something like this:

"The Intrepid," suggested Daring Do.

"Spirit of Curiosity" I offered on a piece of paper.

"The Hunk of Junk," Ginger muttered.

"The Shagwagon." Disarray said it with a completely straight face.

Coconut was too busy laughing at that to come up with a name of his own.

At a crossroads, we voted on it. You know how it is - democracy, fair vote, equal voices, yadda yadda yadda. Unsurprisingly, we all voted for the name we chose (democracy at its best)...all except Coconut, of course, who thought Disarray's choice was completely hilarious.

Popular vote decreed that the vehicle that would carry us on our grand voyage be called...the Shagwagon.

There was much facehooving, indeed. With the exception of the three males of the group; Coconut, Disarray, and I (who eventually succumbed to my inner juvenile) often sniggered wildly at the idea of it scrawled across the side of the wagon. Ginger and Daring Do simply shook their heads in a mix of disbelief, pity, and a loss of all faith in democracy. To make matters worse, Disarray even poof-ed up a vanity licence plate that stated in big bold letters: "SW4G" and fused it to the rear of the wagon, where it became a permanent fixture. Needless to say, the mares refused to let a ridiculous decision like this stand.

The coup was swift and brutal. The masculine majority was overthrown by the terrifying prospect of facing the wrath of Daring's whip and the heat of Ginger's fire. It doesn't help that I folded like a deck of cards the moment Daring asked me to.

That being said, afterwards, it was usually the mares who made all the big decisions. And the decorative choices. And pretty much...everything else.

Well. Mostly.

The second day of rest, I found myself lounging about my room. It was a highly reminiscent of a cabin on a ship, with a small mattress along one wall that folded up to make more space. The bedsheets, a pale blue, had been torn up into long strips by yours truly, and wrapped tightly around my forearms like bandages. They covered the burns well enough, thank goodness. I felt like a monster every time I saw them. A sturdy desk took up the opposing wall, and I fell in love with it immediately. The other two walls were covered in bookshelves! Squee! However, most of them were empty. A few books were present, though, like a tome about the three pony species, another book about the subject of magic, and another providing a rough description of some of Equestria's regions.

It was the tome of magic that I was reading, leaning back in a chair at my desk and thoughtfully holding a short rod of quartz in my mouth like a lollipop, when Daring knocked on the door.

I let loose a two-toned whistle, indicating that I had heard and she was all-clear, and set the book down. I'd been researching spells or enchantments that might have a way of granting me some communication skills. No luck yet...

Daring almost skipped into the room. The last few days she'd been spending hunting around Wethoof for supplies and the like. The effect for her was akin to a shopping spree for an average human female.

Except Daring shopped for ice-axes, explosives, rope, torches, and rations. She was like Lara Croft in a pony's body.

...Sexy.

"Hey Echo~!" she sang, holding something out with a wing. "Look what I found!"

I watched her with interest as I switched my quartz-pop over to the other side of my mouth. It tasted like butterscotch.

Daring tossed the object over to me. I leaned backwards and caught it in one paw. It appeared to be a scroll of some sort, much wider than what I'd imagined. I unraveled it on top of my desk, and smiled broadly as greens and blues and browns sprang up at me.

It was a map, containing the entirety of Equestria.

There were a lot of blank spaces.

"If we're going to see it all, we need a plan," Daring said as she stood behind me, resting her chin on my shoulder to look down at the map. "And since this is all your idea, I think that responsibility falls to you."

She had a good point.

We had a method of transport, but no clear idea where we were going. Equestria was vast. I estimated it to have the same landmass as Africa, back on Earth. Though it looked a little like Australia, rotated 90' degrees clockwise and squished. Daring's maps not only showed me that, but some of the surrounding land as well.

In the southeast bulge was the Great Southern Rainforest, sometimes called the Haysead Swamps, where we currently were, flanked by mountain-borders to the south, and the sea to the east. There was only one marked town in the entire huge region, and that was a city called Rio de Maneiro, much farther to the west, where the rainforest began to thin out.

Along the inwardly-curving southern border of the land was a great desert. I picked out a few cities here, with names like Dodge Junction, Hooverville, and...drumroll please...Appleoosa, nothing more than a speck way out in the middle of nowhere. Surprisingly, it was the closest one to us! Farther out into the southwestern sands was another country, called Saddle Arabia.

The northern reaches of Equestria were rolling plains and temperate, scraggly forests. Bush country, really. The north border was made of pure mountains, the Crystal Mountains; highest mountains in Equestria. Beyond them lay the Frozen North, land of the reindeer, as well as a scattering of diamond dog packs that called the place home.

To the West lay the sea, sealed off by rocky, coastal scrub-lands and small, dry woods. But that wasn't what earned my attention to the area. No, what pricked my interest was the fact that there was a name of a country printed into the surface of the ocean.

Atlantis, to be precise! Seaponies are canon, bitches! I smugly thought to myself.

I dug into my belt and removed my claw, spinning it around in my fingers for a few seconds before placing it down onto the center of the Rainforest. Lightly, I began to trace a large counterclockwise spiral around the map, following the borders first, then slowly circling inwards to the very center of Equestria, where three names rested in a rough triangle. Cloudsdale, Canterlot, and...Ponyville. The end of my journey. And after that? Well...I'd cross that bridge when I came to it.

I don't know what happened to the claw, but Ginger must have baked it so hard that it turned somewhat flaky. As a result, it could be used as a sort of marker, or a pencil. Go figure.

"Hmmmm..." Daring murmured over my shoulder. "Not a bad plan. We'll cover pretty much everything in a couple years, and the actual path won't deviate too much from the line. Any reason you want to go here, first?" She tapped the eastern desert regions with a hoof.

I flipped an edge of the map over to write. "Apples."

The Apploosan Apples, to be precise. That, and I'd always wanted to go to a "Wild West" sort of place. I'd visited the American West a few times, but there wasn't exactly much frontier in a country that stretches from sea to shining sea. Besides, I'd always wanted to meet some of Applejack's extended family.

"Apples?" Daring asked.

I nodded resolutely.

I screamed it inside my head: Applejack is best pony!

I was totally not biased. I might have been saving Ponyville for last, but that didn't mean I couldn't meet some of the other well known stars of the show along the way.

...starting with the best ones, of course.

"Well, if we've got the route estimated, then put the compass down on it and she'll take us where we need to go."

I gave her a confused look.

"The compass?"

Oh! Right! I gently looped it off my neck and set it down on the map. Daring reached over and flipped it open, but kept a hoof on the edge of it. Her face scrunched up for a moment in concentration. I watched in disbelief as the needle immediately ceased its rapid spinning as if held by some mysterious force. Slowly, the needle slid to point off to the East.

Daring took her hoof off it and smirked. "Like it? It's called a 'Homeward Rose.' Might not point north, but she'll get you where you want to go. Just think of a place, and hey presto! Of course, it only works for places you've already been..." She paused for a moment, scratching her head with a hoof. "Not exactly the most useful thing on a journey to unexplored territory. But it'll guide us to a general area, and from there we use my compass."

I cocked an eyebrow at her as I picked up the Homeward Rose from the map. Upon contact, the needle began to spin again.

Daring smirked as she turned to the side and flicked her tail against her cutie mark. "It's just one of the many notable talents of yours truly," she said proudly. "I don't get lost..."

I gave her a flat look.

"...I, uh, just take the scenic route from time to time," she finished, somewhat lamely. "Now then, I think it's time we get you out of this stuffy room of yours. You've been pouring over these books for the past couple days. I think it's time you actually come outside."

Pouting, I spun in my chair to take the tome of magic down off the shelf, before presenting it to her. She blew some dust off the cover before opening its faded pages. Wedged in between the sheets were scores of notes I'd taken on certain things. I'd read a good half of the thing so far, and had just gotten to a section containing some spells used by the legendary Star Swirl the Bearded.

Daring took out a few of the papers and laid them over the map. "Huh. So you've been trying to find a new method of communication...with magic?" At my nod, she continued glancing through them. "I'm sure there's a spell in here that could solve this, but tonight is our last night in Wethoof, Echo. Let's make it special, yeah?"

I twirled the claw in my fingers for a few seconds, before scrawling: "What do you have in mind?" and slipping it into the wrappings on my left arm.

She grinned.

The tavern swam before my eyes in a haze, a pleasant warmth fueling a furnace in my gut. Coconut and Disarray stood on the bar with the bartender, all three of them of them blindingly drunk and staggering as they roared out the next verse of the ballad. It was a riot of noise and soft light, and I was reminded of several pubs I'd frequented when I'd spent time in London.

Rockcider, they called it. "Cider that's hard as a rock," to be more precise. It seemed to be the only thing with enough punch to get me drunk.

AND DAMN DID I HAVE A LOT OF IT! WHOA-HA-HAA-HAAAAR!

I happily swayed to the tune on my seat, a small mountain of empty steins spread out before me on the counter top. Ginger sat to my right, nursing a glass of some evil-looking beverage. "You know," she said slowly, her eyes somewhat unfocused, "that guy knowsh how t' carry a tone. Tune. I shaid tune. Where'd he even learn 'ow to shing like that?" She pointed at Coconut, who was in the middle of a doing a shockingly good version of the Can-Can some distance away, kicking bottles and glasses alike.

I shrugged, before slamming another empty stein down on the counter and popping my rod of quartz back in. "Oh, wait. Here! Let me get that for yeh." Ginger mumbled, as her horn flickered to life, eyes narrowing on the end of my delicious gemstone.

Fwish!

A thin lance of green fire zipped in front of my face, continuing on to strike the far wall in a small explosion of sparks and smoke. Nearby ponies cheered vigorously.

Glancing down, I noticed the end of my quartz was on fire, much like a cigar. How is that even- I began thinking, before cutting it off. You know what? Screw it. Go with the flow.

I took a tentative puff of my mineral cigar. Butterscotch-tasting smoke slid over my taste buds. A perfect ring issued forth as I exhaled a puff of pale vapor. Grinning, I lifted a fresh stein in the air at Ginger. She lifted her own glass and they met with a clink! "Cheers." Ginger took a deep pull, while I simply drained the entire thing in one go.

That's some good motherfucking cider, right there.

Disarray plopped down into the seat next to me, cracking some joke or another that made Ginger's drink come right out of her nose. I forget what it was, but it didn't matter - there was just too much happy to go around. Everything sort of went comfortably blurry at that point and I simply basked in it like the afterglow of a long night's loving.

Somehow I ended up across the tavern, where a small crowd had gathered. I found Daring Do matched up against a swarthy green unicorn, surrounded by a bunch of onlookers.

They were playing...horseshoes?

There were marked differences, though. The small posts one would throw the shoes around were sticking straight out from the wall. There were four, arranged in a rough triangle with a smaller post in the center of the shape. I watched as the green stallion tossed his end over end until it clanged down onto a post, one of the larger ones. His horseshoe, colored blue, knocked off a red one that had already been hanging there.

"Hah!" he laughed to Daring. "Beat that!"

The explorer saw me push through the crowd to the front. "Heya, Echo!" She sashayed over and leaned up against me. "There you are. Say, think you could hold my drink for a sec? Teacher's gotta class to teach - this fool here needs to get schooled." I took her drink in paw, some of that blue wine I'd seen a while ago. She gave me a wink and waltzed back over to the stallion. Was it just me, or was she swaying her hips a little?

She produced a blue horseshoe and spun it around her foreleg for a moment, thinking hard.

"Wassa matter?" asked the stallion. "Can't think of a way to win, that's it."

Daring smirked. "Nah. Just figuring out how many points I'll be leading by."

"Ohh? And how many will that be?"

"Dunno. Depends on whether or not this is against the rules." With that the mare removed her pith helmet and tossed the horseshoe inside. In one smooth movement, she gripped the helmet with one hoof and pulled the brim back with her teeth, stretching it taunt like a bowstring.

"Watch thiff," she mumbled through the helmet.

Aside from Daring, I was the only one who knew what was coming next.

I hit the deck like I was on fire. Stop, drop, and roll, bitches!

Thwang!

The helmet launched almost fast than the eye could see...in the opposite direction.

Ping!

It bounced off the rim of a drinking trough...

Zwoosh!

Straight through the mane of some unwary mare, somehow shaving her down to a stubble...

Clonk!

Knocked Coconut, still singing, off the bar...

Phwip!

Ricocheted from the ceiling corner...

Crash!

And promptly went out a window.

The stallion burst out laughing, as did most of the crowd. He good-naturedly clapped her on the back. "Good try, lass! Good try!" I peeked out from where I'd been cowering on the floor, finding where I'd dropped my cigar to stick it back in my mouth for another sweet puff.

"Wait for it," said Daring.

Whatever the stallion was going to say next would forever be lost to the annals of time.

A streak burst through the window on the opposite side of the building it'd left, impacting right in the middle of the array of posts. When the dust settled, there was Daring's hat, resting perfectly from the center peg! She casually strolled over to it and flipped it off its resting place to her head, revealing the blue horseshoe hanging perfectly underneath.

There was absolute, thunderously booming silence.

Disarray, sitting back in a a bar stool, began to slowly clap. "Now that's a spicy meatball!" That broke the dam, and soon the entire tavern was rocking with cheers. The pegaus was swarmed with admirers and congratulatory back-thumping. Ever the gracious winner, Daring shook hooves with the unicorn and even offered a few words of advice, though over the dull roar of tavern, I could not hear them.

Then she was standing in front of me, yelling something over the noise. I put a paw to my ear and bent down to listen. "It's getting pretty crazy in here, want to get some air?" At my enthusiastic nod, she grabbed me with a hoof and hustled me through the press. I barely had enough time to extinguish my cigar and stick it in my wrappings.

...Ever seen a diamond dog used as a battering ram?

Freaking. Hysterical.

I felt the fresh breeze hit my face the moment we managed to squeeze through the door. I remembered leaving my duster in the Shagwagon, and was suddenly glad I did. It was well past sunset now, the last remnants of the day bleeding out from behind the horizon. Wethoof was thronging with ponies, and through my pleasant buzz I briefly thought I was looking at a kaleidoscope.

We made our way past the outskirts of Wethoof's wooden lillypads. The pavilion was still set up in the field where the memorial. A few ponies were sitting in the grass, rustic instruments beside them as they looked over sheets of music. Traveling musicians, maybe?

It was at that moment I was struck by a crazy idea. Whether it was the prodigious amounts of liquor flowing through my veins, giving me courage, or the sheer perfection of the situation, I'll never know.

I released myself from Daring's grasp and extended a finger, indicating that she should wait there for a moment. I approached the musicians and gave a deep bow of greeting.

One of them, a russet-collered earth pony mare, spoke up. "Hello there. Can we help you with something?"

I removed the claw from where I'd kept it in my wrappings and took up blank piece of sheet music. "What's he doing?" asked one of the musicians.

"I think this must be the mute we heard about from the locals," said the first one. "I heard he writes instead of speaking. Let's see what he's doing." They crowded around what I had been scrawling onto the sheet. "Oh-ho! This is interesting! Flat, Sharp, look at this!"

"I was wondering if I could ask you to play something for me," I quickly wrote as they looked on, "for my friend and I over there."

"Your friend, eh?" The russet mare looked over to where Daring was standing, awkwardly scuffing a hoof on the ground. "Mhmmmm." One of the others picked up something that looked like a harp and a guitar put together. Somehow, without any fingers whatsoever, he plucked a few precise notes that rang crystal clear. "I think we can do something for ya. Go get her, dog."

With pleasure.

I bounded back over to Daring and swept her up over one shoulder. "Whaaaahaha! Echo! What's going oooon-!?" That was a far she got before I took a mighty leap and sailed right up to the pavilion, and swung her off, into a graceful spin.

I heard something behind me whisper my name. I glanced back to see Disarray and Coconut peeking over the edge of the pavilion. "Oy! Fluffy! It's dangerous to go out alone! Take one of these!" Disarray hissed. Coconut threw a rose at me, which I caught in my teeth, before giving them a thumbs-up. They vanished from view like a pair of evil gophers.

I spun back around to Daring, rose in grinning mouth, and struck a dancing pose the exact instant the music began to play.

Yep. Way too much to drink.

Daring, unbelievably, simply laughed and struck a pose of her own, an eyebrow arched as she tossed her hat aside. "Bold. Very bold. I like it."

And then...we danced. The spicy rhythm set my heartbeat jumping out of my chest as we spun across the sunlit stage and met, paw in hoof.

Any fool daring to call himself a gentleman must learn how to dance. Tango, Salsa, Bachata, Mambo, Salsa...they fit the music perfectly. I was no ballroom master, but damn it, I'd dropped more than a few jaws when the time called for it. I met her steps with ones of my own - rusty, but still skilled.

The few moves that I'd always been troubled by - I spot them coming a mile away, almost matching her pace for pace, a second shadow.

She suddenly spun back into me and I instinctively bent her over into a dip. I was pleasantly astonished to see that the rose was in her mouth now. When did that happen?

She bent farther over and flipped out of the dip. Still grasping a hoof, I pulled her down and whipped her through my legs. A powerful gust of air sounded as she vaulted off the stage and pressed herself to me, back to back. We stayed like that for a split second, and then the dance continued.

It was almost like playing with fire, in a way. She was wild and free, and I didn't so much as lead her as I did point her in the right direction and watch as she worked a different kind of magic. I could respect that. Some men lead, some follow. I preferred to go side-by-side.

She was a whirling dervish of movement using her wings just as much as I used my paws, morphing the moves into mind-bending aerial twists and spins. We swayed and swooned and leaped and kicked through the final moments of daylight, beating out a furious stacatto on the wooden planking as if were an instrument itself.

Although I held the dominant position, she was somehow guiding me as much as I did with her. I didn't complain, picking up on the minute cues to twirl her around at almost frightening speed. The world was spinning and swirling and there she was, at the very center of it all, smiling and laughing, enjoying herself like it was the last day on earth. At that very moment, I realized a truth - there are moments in everyone's life they never forget. This was more than that, though. This was one that would define me.

I embraced the moment. Carpe diem. The day shall be seized.

I was in a haze of joy. Rapture, even. The way the sunlight flickered through her wild mane into those eyes, the soft rush of wind as she snapped her wings to and fro was all I could see. There was no formula for what we did, no guide. It was deeper than that, something else guiding our steps. I could never remember being any happier than that instant. And it was all thanks to the beautiful mare dancing beside me.

She pirouetted swiftly and fell back as the music reached the final note, I twisted to catch her, cradling her in sure paws.

...or I would have, had we not danced too close to the edge. In a tangle of fur and feathers, we tumbled over the side and crashed into the ground with a powerful whump! I wheezed as Daring landed right on top of my stomach, the rose flying out of her mouth. As I caught my breath, I suddenly became aware of her position, and fell still. Daring sensed it as well, and looked down from where she was lying over my chest, laughing gently. I reached up and wrapped my arms around her, careful not to pin her fluttering wings. My entire world shrank down to those two breathtaking eyes, that flushed face, that small, cocky smile...

I moved first. Our lips met as the moon crested the horizon. I closed my eyes as sparks flew in my brain, wild jolts of happiness and warmth. My chest burst with fireworks as the universe faded away to leave the perfect sensation of her soft mouth against mine, her tongue delicately teasing my own. Her hooves came down and rested against the sides of my neck, caressing me. I could feel her heart beating, almost matching me, beat for wild beat.

I opened my eyes as she slowly pulled away, face flushed red, eyes flickering. "Took you long enough to work up the guts," she said softly. "I've been wanting to do this for a while." At my bashful grin, she simply laughed, before diving down for another deep kiss that scrambled any coherent thoughts I'd had in my head.

Through the haze of pleasure, I finally let go.

No inhibitions.

No worries.

No right or wrong.

There was only her and I.

And I needed nothing else.

The day of our departure had arrived. We left early in the morning, or as early as we could manage to get up, due to the fact that we all had whopping hangovers.

That...and I was rather enjoying sleeping in, dozing comfortably in the cabin across from my own, a tannish-gold pegasus nestled against my side.

Thank the gods for alcohol.

Liquid courage, some call it. Well, it certainly worked wonders for me, aside from a splitting headache. Oh, yes. Wonders, indeed. The "wonderful" part definitely fit the bill, if last night had been anything to go by. Of course, ever the gentleman, I had at first resisted the idea, but once Daring Do sets her mind on something, she usually gets it. I was no exception.

Literally...

I smiled to myself as I snuggled down into the bedding. Daring reflexively curled up against me and murmured something in her sleep.

Screw the code. That...was worth every damn second.

As with all good things, however, the peace of the morning was ended when I felt the call of nature. I gently lifted myself out of bed and crept out the door to the common room, where I found Disarray sitting on a cushion in his draconequus form, staring into the fading embers of the metal fire pit that took up the center of the floor.

"Well, well, well! The walk of shame, in all its glory," he said. As a flush of embarrassment crept up my face, he continued ,"How'd it go, Fluffy?" he asked me. "You know, we placed bets to see how long it took you two to finally get together." He frowned. "Coconut won, the son of a goat. So. How was it?"

I merely shrugged, but failed to suppress a satisfied smirk. I certainly wasn't going to be telling anyone about what happened last night. Gentleman's code of honor, and all that. Show some respect for my lady. Er, mare, in this case.

Disarray grinned wickedly. "Alright, fine, I won't press...I have but one question for you."

I waved a paw at him, imploring him to go on.

"Doggystyle?"

I gave him a flat look.

"So is that a yes, or a n--hey get those paws away from me!"

Some time later, I stood outside the Shagwagon, enjoying the sunrise as it painted the sky a bright cyan. It would be the last sunrise I saw here. Might as well savor it. I took a deep breath of morning air and readjusted all of my wrappings, before taking my hooded duster off a nearby wheel and slinging it on. I tensed my legs and sprang to the driver's seat, silently scrambling up onto the wagon's roof. I crossed my legs and sat down, listening to the light breeze and the distant sounds of crickets and cicadas.

I had been given a wonderful chance to do something truly incredible here. I'd never asked Discord why, though. Why me? He'd said I was a harbinger of change. That my very presence was significant enough to bring about shifts in Equestria. That could be a good or a bad thing, depending on what's changing. Maybe it was pointless for wondering, but I couldn't help but do so. There were undoubtedly others more qualified for this.

Why me?

If I were Discord, why would I choose just me?

Maybe he didn't choose just you.

Now that...was a very sobering thought.

But even if I wasn't alone, why would I be among these few?

I imagined what Discord would say about that. "Why not?" I pictured him saying coyly.

Bah. Thinking makes my brain hurt.

I pushed the debate away, intending to consider it later. Instead, I simply focused on clearing my mind, on the sights, sounds, and smells of a new day.

My meditation was interrupted, however, when I heard the sound of hooves on the wooden boardwalks of Wethoof. I opened my eyes to find that the sun had risen a good distance, though it was still early. How long had I been occupied? I turned about to inspect the newcomers, and was greatly surprised to see who it was.

Major Tythus came to a halt a few paces away from the wagon, flanked on either side by Duke Borealis and Duchess Australis. "Good morning, Echo," the old soldier greeted me cordially. The two graceful alicorns beside him murmured their own greetings. I hopped down from the wagon and deeply bowed before them to return the greeting. "We have come for Disarray. He swore an oath to my lords here, and it must be upheld."

Did he now? Huh.

Borealis stepped forward. "While the Prince may have renounced his role, he still owes his family some time, my sister and I included..."

Australis answered in perfect timing. "...He promised to return to Canterlot, to see his mother and the others once again, for the first time in two millennium. We have missed him greatly," she said with a twinge of melancholy.

"The Patchwork Prince," Tythus said quietly. "I had thought him a legend. Did not believe it myself until-"

"-Until I revealed myself to you, Major," Disarray said, stepping out from behind Borealis as if he had been hiding there the entire time. "I could see why I faded into obscurity. Ponies do not generally think that their beloved Princess could be capable of creating something...like me." He clacked his lobster claws. "Easier to forget a mistake than acknowledge it, eh?" He laughed at that.

Australis shifted uncomfortably. "Perhaps, but your mother was burdened by your loss for nearly a century. The Royal Family thought you forever gone, cousin..."

"...Make no mistake, we searched high and low for you, until Celestia herself called off the searches at the end of her grief. One hundred years may be a smaller period for those as long-lived as we..."

"...But the ponies who came and went during this time soon began to doubt you had ever existed. But we remembered."

Disarray coughed politely. "Yes. Memory is the key, after all. I thank you for that, I suppose. Fear not, though. I intend to go with you. But make no mistake, I do not intend on staying in Canterlot. My place is here," he said, sweeping a bear-arm towards the Shagwagon, "or at least until the journey ends."

Major Tythus nodded, face expressionless. "As long as you meet with the Royal Family, your word is fulfilled."

"Pah. Words mean nothing unless you make them so." He turned to me and clapped my shoulder with a bear paw. "Well then, big guy, I guess this is goodbye for now. You know, it's kind of funny. I'm sort of leaving family to see family." At my confused expression he leaned forward and whispered in my ear. "We share the same father, in a convoluted sense. He created your body from nothing, but sired me the old-fashioned way. You're kind of like a half-brother." He grinned. "Yet another royal castaway. I wonder how my mother would take knowing that the former king had kids on the side...heh. Don't worry, Fluffy. I'll put in a good word for you. Ta-ta!" With that, he pulled away and joined Major Tythus, shifting into his alicorn state with a flash of light. "Ready, Freddy."

The four of them raised their horns, the tips aglow with a harsh radiance. I shielded my eyes with a paw, wincing. A sharp crack filled the air, and when I lowered my paw...they were gone.

Two thousand years, and the Patchwork Prince was finally going home.

Lucky bastard. I wished I could do the same. At least for a while.

"Huh. I was wondering when he'd leave." Ginger's voice shocked me out of staring at the place they'd been standing. I spun about to see her leaning on her...spear? The spearhead was missing! "Here," she said, tossing me the shaman's staff. The wood felt wonderful in my scarred paws, even through the wrapping. I rubbed the top with a finger, feeling the disfiguring ripples where the arcanite blade had once been.

"I don't care what the other dogs do. I'm not a dog, and this is a new pack, so I will lead it a new way. Starting with this," she stated. Ginger turned a bit, and I could see the former spearhead sticking out of a short scabbard over her side, a small wooden handle replacing the staff. "I'd start learning how to use that thing, Echo. A beta is more than just a deputy position."

I gave her the finger.

"What does that even mean?" she asked. "You do that all the time."

...

I struck a salute.

"So it's a sign of respect or something...?"

Yeah. Sure! I nodded earnestly. I could have some fun with this. Maybe she'd make it our official salute, or something like that.

I imagined a huge pack of diamond dogs, standing at attention as Princess Celestia made rousing speech upon a podium, Ginger and I by her side. At the closing, hundreds of middle fingers were raised in respect and admiration.

Priceless.

Ginger snorted and tossed her mane as she strode away to the wagon entrance. "I don't know what you're chuckling about, but knock it off. Come on, it's time we leave."

The former gate to Wethoof passed by overhead as we made our way out onto the thick plains that covered the former wasteland.

I padded slowly alongside the wagon, while Daring perched atop the driver's seat, keen eyes peering out over the land. Coconut lumbered along in his harness, pulling the wagon without too much trouble. Ginger Snap trotted up ahead, having volunteered to scout the path and make sure our way was clear.

Being fully outfitted felt surprisingly comfortable. The hood pulled low over my face to shield the sun, duster hugging my fur. It was light and airy, as spider-silk tends to be, but had the strength of steel. The wrappings around my wrists were a soothing presence. I noted somewhat grimly how much I preferred to keep the scars covered. Over the wraps were the bracers, thick and dense, my only protection besides my thick hide, sharp rear claws and teeth, and a staff strapped to my back.

The day was still young. In the distance, I could hear the sound of birds. The rainforest beckoned, drawing me closer. What sights would we see? Who would we meet? Where would we go? The forest gave no answers, but a stiff breeze rustled the leaves of the mighty trees; nature's soft sigh.

Beyond lay Equestria, in all its glory.

A new world, ripe for discovery and new stories to be written.

I glanced around again at the ponies who had chosen to embark alongside me. For better or worse, we had found common aims. I looked at Coconut. To spread cheer. Ginger turned back at us before continuing forward. To redeem. I observed my paws as they struck the ground with steady rythym. To change. Finally, I watched Daring Do as she relaxed in her seat, eagerly watching the world pass by. To have one last adventure... We were bound for greatness, to become legends in our own rights.

I grinned to myself and picked up the pace.

It's a magical world...let's go exploring.

(Epilogue) Another Message From Echo

Dear Reader,

Seasons come and go. Tides rise and recede. The moon has its phases, and even the stars don't last forever.

At the end of my own time, before the bridge between this world and the next, I write down the story of my life. My baptism in the rainforest was many years in the past, and as I have aged, I found that my memory has begun to slip. This helps me remember the lessons I have learned, the faces I've seen and places I've been.

My coat is streaked with white, now. My joints are old and creaky. But this old dog isn't done yet. Oh, no.

Did you think I was going to end my story there?

My legacy is longer than that, I assure you. What I have written so far is but a piece of the puzzle that my life became. Battles fought, sunsets watched, love won and lost...some call me a living legend for doing so much. I have other names, to be sure.

The Halfwolf.

Silent One.

Beta.

Ghostclaws.

Number 46.

Alpha.

Friend of the Family.

Student.

Father.

Ambassador.

Son.

Lover.

Friend.

The Dane's Bane.

Traitor.

Slave.

But you can call me Echo. It's my name, or at least the one I chose for myself. And if there's any lesson you should learn from me, it's this: don't let the facts get mixed up with the truth. But I digress. My bones are weary and these eyes aren't what they used to be. So before I forget...

Let me tell you the rest of my tale...

Author: Fear not! The sequel shall come! I shall be posting the link in a subsequent chapter once I've written the first few parts and had them sufficiently edited. Any information about it you can find HERE!

Don't expect it for a while, though.

I suppose I should say a few words, or something like that. It sort of feels like i'm losing a friend by wrapping this story up. It was a first for me, in a lot of ways. It was my first featured work, that I suppose brought me into the limelight as a moderately-known author. It's featured on Equestria Daily! Holy tits, was that the best day of my life when I saw it up there! Writing became a habit for me (both good and bad) thanks to this fic, and I must admit, I had a lot of fun writing it.

I'd like to thank anyone who ever offered me criticism. It was you who helped me develop this story better than I could ever have imagined.

I'd like to thank all of those who submitted fan art. I was completely blown away by it - truly, to the core. You guys gave my work a face, and something to represent it by.

I'd like to thank my Supreme Master Lord Chief Editor, Nathan Traveler, for being a total douche canoe, riding my ass about the terrible writing I dare create in hilarious and unpredictable ways.

And, I'd like to thank myself, for losing that ridiculous bet I took so long ago that resulted in my entrance to writing fanfiction.

Damn, I'm good.