Private Weber blew at the fly buzzing by his face and blinked a few times, trying to get rid of the crosshairs now burnt into his retina. Peering through the small 4x scope attached to his MG62 Heavy Machine Gun for so long was starting to take its toll: he could already feel a cramp beginning in his shoulder as he tried to work it.

“{Dude, you can relax,}” the man responsible for keeping the machine gun loaded said, leaning next to him on an ammo canister. “{We have a clear field of view for a good few-hundred yards, and we know where they’re coming from. It’s not like the Americans are gonna pop out of a hole in the ground and grab you!}”

“{I know, Francis,}” Weber replied. “{I know we’re gonna win here: I just don’t want to miss any of the action, is all.}”

“{Action?}” Francis smiled. “{What action? They’re going to pop out of those trees with our guys at their heels, and we’re going to mow them down. Simple as that.}”

“{Yeah, sure, but still, I want to be ready to go when the time comes.}”

“{Go? Go where?}” Francis asked, a half-cocked smile on his face.

“{Don’t be a smartass, you know what I meant!}”

“{You’ll be ready, don’t worry! There’ll be plenty of them to kill when they arrive! And besides, you KNOW who we have with us,}” the other man shot a quick look over at the small tent pitched just within the compound’s defenses. “{It’s not like they can sneak past him.}”

“{Must you be so loud when you speak of the Commander?}” Weber asked worriedly. “{You know what they say about the devil…}”

“{Bah, you’re too jumpy, Weber,}” Francis laughed. “{Scared of the Americans, scared of the Commander, scared of your own shadow! I swear, it’s like you think your enemies are just going to drop from the sky and land on your head!}”

The only warning both men got for what was to come was the sound of feathers rustling, like a bird flapping its wings. Suddenly, a large, winged, white horse with a flowing, rainbow-colored mane swooped out of the sky and landed gently on Weber’s head. “Guten tag,” the horse said cheerfully, the light from the moon shimmering in her big, bright eyes and off the little tiara perched in her mane.

“{WHAT IN THE HOLIEST SHIT!?}”

Without missing a beat, the horse promptly reached over to their machine gun, slid the firing mechanism out of place, and bowed, the mechanism in her hooves. “And an Auf Wiedereshen to you, my dear sirs!” She said before taking off into the pre-dawn sky, the smile never once leaving her lips.

Weber pulled his helmet off, surprised at the lack of hoofmarks on it. She must have been insanely gentle to pull that off, he thought as he replaced the helmet.

“{Wuh-was our main weapon just disabled by a German-speaking horse princess!?}” The man next to him asked.

“{I think it was. Should we report this?}”

“{Fuck no.}”

--------------------------------------------------------

Celestia swooped into the field nearby and deposited her latest acquisition at Swarm’s feet. “Okay, that should make all of them. The enemy’s perimeter defenses should be disabled now.”

“Wonderful,” he replied, poking at the small pile of metal with his feet.

“I have to ask, though: if the enemy’s defenses posed no real threat to us, why did you want them disabled?”

“Oh, you know me, Princess,” Swarm replied with a wink, clapping his hands together. “I’ve always been a hands-on kind of guy.”

As Celestia watched, a gray spurt of goo oozed from between Swarm’s palms, running up his arms and enveloping his entire body. The goo smoothed itself out into a featureless metallic sheen, leaving only the form of a man to tell the outside observer that somebody was inside it. Then the form began to grow, its arms and legs extending to blunt, featureless tips, while the chest rose to envelop the head, leaving only a large, featureless gray shape in the vague shape of a large, headless man. Ready to see a true display of power? Chen’s voice asked in her head.

Smiling, she gestured towards the enemy position nearby. “By all means, lead the way.”

---------------------------------------------------------

“{You tell him!}” Weber barked, shoving his partner to the ground.

“{For the love of God, man, I have a wife and child at home!}” Francis gasped. “{You know how the Commander gets when he hears bad news!}”

“{Oh, so my life doesn’t mean as much because I haven’t found a woman desperate enough to marry me!?}”

“{But think of the child!}” The man was on his knees now, hands clenched in a full-on begging position. “{Think of my poor, dear, sweet wife! Think of my mother…}”

“{I have a mother too, asshole!}”

“{What in the hell’s all this commotion!?}” A man in an officer’s cap bellowed as he strode up to the pair. “{Why aren’t you two holding the line!?}”

Both men stood at attention immediately, the argument leaving their minds. After saluting, Weber tried to speak: “{Sir! Um…our…uh…we are having difficulties because…uh…}”

“{Well, spit it out!}” The officer screamed impatiently, one of his gloved hands reaching for his holster.

“{Uh…we…we…}”

“{Sir, there’s no proper way to put this,}” Weber’s partner sighed. “{Our weapon was disabled by a…large, talking, white horse.}”

“{A large, talking, white horse.}” The officer repeated flatly.

“{Yes, sir.}”

“{And how did this horse manage to disable the finest equipment in all of creation while evading two of the Fuhrer’s own highly-trained soldiers?}”

“{She…uh…flew away, sir.}” Weber said, praying that honesty really was the best policy.

“{She flew away.}”

“{Yes sir, we are quite certain it was a mare and…and she had wings, sir. Which she used to fly away.}”

The officer stared at his men for what felt like an eternity, his eyes squinting at them for the smallest sign of dishonesty. The pair squirmed beneath the piercing gaze for a full five minutes before the officer sighed and allowed his hand to drop from his holster. “{Goddammit; you too, huh?}”

“Eh?” Weber looked over the officer’s shoulder to see a huge crowd gathered behind him: every single man meant to be on the front line, just standing around nervously, some of them dancing back and forth as if they had to use the bathroom. “{The whole line!?}” He gasped in disbelief.

The officer nodded. “{We were just trying to decide on who should be the one to tell the Commander. You know he doesn’t take bad news well.}”

“{Well,}” Francis picked himself up off the ground. “{I, for one, believe it should be…}”

“{Francis, if you say anything about guys with the most to lose, I swear, I’ll…}”

Suddenly, a silver glint appeared in the sky overhead. The soldiers had no time to respond before something rocketed out of the sky and slammed into the ground in their midst, standing to its full height. The three men standing away from the main gathering peered through the crowd. “{What in…}”

The figure, which stood like a man but had no head and no fingers, suddenly bowed and perched on one of its blunt “hands,” the rest of the body spinning furiously while its “legs” lashed out. The ten unfortunate souls standing closest to it were knocked off their feet immediately, bodies twisted about by the sheer force of the kicks. Quick as a blink, the form was back on its two lower extremities and descending upon the crowd of men around it, rocketing this way and that with powerful kicks, punches, and chops delivered by those strange, blunt extremities.

As the trio watched, totally dumbfounded, the thing systematically made its way through the crowd, delivering beatings at speeds far beyond what a normal man could ever deliver, sometimes beating its victim into submission before its previous victim even had a chance to hit the ground. Two men who had the presence of mind to bring their assault rifles tried to fire into the confused mass of bodies where the thing was making its way towards them, only to watch as the thing burst free and promptly attacked, shoving the weapons back against their bodies and whipping them away with enough force to send them spinning into the air. It took less than a minute for the thing to finish off all fifty of the men gathered in the crowd, turning a once proud platoon into a large, groaning mass of shattered bodies.

The three standing off to the side watched in awe. “{My God, it’s perfect!}” Weber realized out loud. “{Its design is perfect for hand-to-hand combat! Perfectly balanced! Perfectly trained…}”

“{Horseshit,}” his officer replied, striding up to the thing with his pistol out. “{Yoo-hoo, little creature!}”

The silvery thing turned its attention to the officer, seeing without eyes.

“{Oh, you understand this?}” He grinned, leveling the weapon on the creature. “{You understand what this means? You are talented, creature, but how can you counter an attack launched from out of arm’s reach!?}”

He laughed before squeezing the trigger, the shot echoing off into the night. The grin still remained as a few wisps of smoke drifted off the barrel of his weapon. Then his eyes widened.

The creature still stood there, completely unfazed. The officer snarled and emptied the rest of the pistol’s magazine into the creature’s body, to absolutely no effect. No entry wounds. No holes. Not even a spark from the bullet being deflected by some armor. It was as if the bullet was simply disappearing.

“{Impossible!}” The officer screamed, scrambling to load a fresh mag as the creature strode calmly up to him. In a panic, the officer just barely managed to slam a fresh magazine into his weapon before turning and firing another shot. A hole appeared right on the creature, perfectly symmetrical, right where the bullet should have hit. The officer smiled, until the hole simply filled itself in and disappeared.

“{Yuh-you’re doing that,}” he realized. “{You’re just opening the holes yourself and letting the bullets pass right through you, and you’re doing it so fast nobody can even see it!}”

The creature stood there, not moving, not making any sort of gesture to indicate it understood.

“{Muh-MONSTER! DEMON FROM…}” the officer raised his pistol, only to watch the thing take a step forward and envelop his hand in its body. The man dropped to his knees in shock, his hand freeing itself sans pistol after a few moments.

“{Whu-what are you?}” He whimpered, his hand closing on air.

{The voice of the innocent,} a voice in his head replied before the creature wound back and delivered a tornado kick, catching the officer in the jaw and sending him sprawling over the ground.

Weber and Francis gazed at the thing before it turned its attention to them. Both pairs of hands immediately rose into the air. The thing seemed to nod in their direction before a loud series of shots cracked through the forest. The thing turned towards the crest of the hill, where the main artillery batteries had been setup. An entire flood of men, at least a hundred strong, came pouring down towards them, rushing over the hill with whatever weapon they could find: be it rifle, pistol, or even a heavy stick.

“{And here come the guys from the artillery,}” Weber said.

“{Shit, I’m not even sure I wanna see what it does next,}” Francis replied, though he didn’t make any motion to turn away. They sat there, transfixed like a couple of guys at an action/sci-fi flick, as the thing back-flipped into the air and slammed a leg into the ground, the earth caving away to reveal a tunnel. A few seconds later, the Princess of Day appeared at the mouth of the cavern, leading the way victoriously as a few dozen Marines followed close on her hooves.

“CHARGE!” She screamed, Webb and his men roaring furiously as they met the enemy flood in battle, weapons blazing. The silvery creature promptly flipped over all their heads, landing right in the middle of the melee to repeat its display from before, only this time it had the Princess of Day and a platoon of paratroopers on its side. Between the Princess and the creature, the enemy stood absolutely no chance. With her shielding every shot they took and the thing punching each and every one of them into submission, it soon became clear who the victor was going to be. After less than thirty seconds of fighting, the few remaining soldiers still on their feet laid down their weapons and surrendered.

“Perfect!” Celestia said, beaming brightly.

“I hafta say, I never expected a pony princess t’be good at fighting.” Webb said as he strode up to her, a pair of prisoners at gunpoint.

“Oh, you should have seen me a thousand years ago, now THAT was something,” she replied coyly. “Now, where is your counterpart? I would think he’d like to partake in these celebrations.”

“You mean Bannon?” Webb looked around. “That’s funny, I thought he was right next to me.”

Suddenly, a body landed between them. A maniacal cackle followed, echoing through the night. “Oh my God, Bannon!” Webb gasped, recognizing the name tag stenciled into the side of the man’s helmet.

“Dear sir, are you alright!?” The Princess galloped up to the body’s side, nudging at the helmet on his head. “Dear sir, please! I must know if…”

The helmet suddenly rolled away, a geyser of blood gushing behind it, revealing absolutely nothing on the man’s shoulders. His head had been torn off, leaving just a gore-covered stump with a bit of spine poking out. The cackling turned into full-on laughter as everyone nearby, enemy prisoners included, recoiled in horror. “Looking for something?” A voice boomed. All eyes turned skyward as Mars hovered over their heads, a round object clenched in his hand. He held it out, grinning devilishly as the moon’s light revealed it to be the missing Marine’s head.

“Oh my God…” Celestia mumbled, suppressing the urge to puke.

You…why… a voice echoed randomly through everyone’s head.

Mars simply smiled and took off. “Catch me if you can!” He yelled tauntingly, a silver streak quickly taking off in pursuit.

“And now it is my turn to play catch-up,” Celestia sighed. “Mr. Webb, I take it you are capable of tying things down here?”

“Yes’m.”

“Good. We shall mourn your man later. Right now, I need you to secure the remainder of these prisoners and make your way back to Coltton. The city is almost certainly under attack by now, and your allies shall require your aid.” And just like that, she took off into the night sky, leaving the paratrooper with a stunning realization:

“I just fought Nazis side-by-side with a talking pony princess,” he mumbled, his mind descending completely into shock.

“This shit’s all kinds of ridiculous sir,” a soldier said lightly as he passed by, a crimson-red Nazi banner in his arms as a trophy.

“Yeah, so damn funny you could laugh,” Webb sighed, watching a pair of men grab Bannon’s body and carry it out of sight. “So how come I just feel like breakin’ down and crying?”