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Feghoot

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Chapter 1: Schmuck Bait

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Feghoot
Chapter 1- Schmuck Bait

Spike took aim, his tongue sticking out of the side of his mouth in concentration. He let the smooth stone fly. He and his friends eagerly watched as the stone skipped on Ponyville Pond. Once, twice, and sailed over the target. Even skipping six more times before sinking didn't rouse the dragon's spirits.

"Nice try Spike, but here's how it's done," Rainbow Dash told him, and took aim, and made a mighty throw, only to have the stone skip in an arc away from the floating bottle. Rainbow huffed at that, and especially Applejack's chuckling. "I'd like to see you do better."

"Then keep yer eyes open," the farm pony picked up a stone and sent it gently skipping across the pond. It hit the bottle, but without enough force to do anything.

"Ha, you didn't get it either!" Rainbow exulted as she fluttered over Applejack.

"Leastways I hit it," Applejack said in her defense. The two friends growled at each other nose to nose.

Rarity cleared her throat. "It's clear that finesse is needed for this, not brute force," she told them, levitating her carefully chosen, skipping stone. With her horn magic she tossed the stone and watched it skip once before sinking well short of the target. "Well," she said as the others hid their snickering.

While the others were distracted. Fluttershy made her throw. The stone skipped several times, but like Rainbow Dash's, skipped away from the target.

"Pinkie, are you sure this is how the game is supposed to be played?" Twilight asked.

"Of course!" the pink mare insisted, "You think I'd just throw a party without a good reason?" she asked. Around them, dozens of the other Ponyvillians laughed, ate and waited for their chance at the target.

"Of course not," Pinkie insisted when all her friends had suddenly taken up studying the clouds or the ground.

"Yeah, you'd need someone to at least drop a hat," Rainbow said.

"Ooo! We can have a hat-dropped party tomorrow!" Pinkie exclaimed.

Rainbow hovered there and facehooved.

"Well, there are others waiting their turn," Twilight said, "And it is kind of nice just hanging out with friends."

"So, you read a book on skipping stones?" Rainbow teased.

"As a matter of fact, I did," Twilight said and picked up her stone with her hoof and took careful aim, before letting fly. The stone skipped straight towards the jar target, and right over it.

"Must have been the same book I read," Spike grumbled as Twilight stared at the miss, no doubt calculating her improvements for her next throw.

"This is hard," Twilight admitted, 'This could almost be a sport."

"Sure Sugarcube, but who'd watch it?" Applejack asked.

Pinkie stood on her hind legs, aimed at the target, and made a mighty throw. The first skip was short of the target, the second carried it well over the floating jar. The third made it to the opposite shore.

"You wanna see if it hits the jar in the next lake over?" Rainbow teased.

"Grrr," Pinkie replied.

The friends moved aside as Cheerilee and the mayor led a group of youngsters forward to make their tries.

The daisy sandwiches and apple treats made a good lunch. Then Applejack revealed a small barrel.

She instantly had Rainbow's complete and undivided attention. "Is that what I think, I hope, I pray it is?"

Applejack nodded. "Granny Smith's private reserve. Apple Family only. But after those varmints tried to steal our farm, you all are family." She carefully poured a small mug for Rainbow Dash. "Now sip -"

The pegasus had already drunk the entire mug. Barely remembering not to swallow the mug itself.

"Y'all, sip yours," Applejack warned as Rainbow Dash stood there, wings at maximum extension, staring wide-eyed at something in the distance and starting to sweat profusely.

The pegasus began changing colors at random, with her mane, tail and wings becoming different colors. It culminated in her body and wings being two clashing plaid, green and purple polka dotted mane, and her tail going white. Then she fell over and rested on an outstretched wing.

"Rainbow Dash!' Twilight shouted in fright.

"Can I have another?" Rainbow asked in a voice that sounded like a Crusader-aged filly.

"Let the others sip their's, then you kin have seconds," Applejack said, "No Spike, yer too young. Might stunt yer growth . . . or make it happen."

Rarity's first sip made her mane straighten like Pinkamena's. Pinkie turned gray, faded back to normal, giggled, took another sip and turned gray again.

Twilight sipped, and fell over. Rainbow catching the mug so not a drip was spilled. "By Celestia," Twilight intoned, "I'm full of stars."

Fluttershy sipped, glanced around nervously, took a larger drink. "Sorry."

"Don't worry Sugarcube, I jist do this," Applejack said and sipped. Her hat flew off her head, flipped a full 360 and landed back down. "That what you get from Zap Apple cider."

They continued eating, and sipping cider, laughing at the effect it had on each other, and watching the other party-goers try and fail to hit the bobbing jar with skipped rocks. Until it was their turn again at the elusive, mayonnaise jar target floating teasingly at the middle of the pond. There they discovered the cider had not improved their markmareship.

"Ha!" Rainbow Dash laughed, "You couldn't hit a barn you were standing inside!"

"At least I kin still skip mine," Applejack replied hotly, "Splooch!"

"Look out!" Spike shouted. All the mares froze and glanced around. Spike skipped a stone, and managed a glancing tap on the bottle.

"Why'd you shout 'look out'?" Applejack asked.

"Got you to quit fighting, didn't it?" Spike replied dryly.

Fluttershy noted the groups left around the pond were the young couples who were likely uninterested in party games. She flew out and retrieved the half-full, mayonnaise jar. It had a few scuffs, and one small crack in the glass, but nothing that would have admitted water to the inside. "I think it didn't work," she told Pinkie.

"Don't be blue Pinkie," Rarity reassured her friend, "Everypony had a wonderful time. Eating good food and playing with friends."

"Yeah, I guess," Pinkie said quietly, "It's just I think we kinda missed the point, as long as that kept floating." The indicated the jar still in Fluttershy's hooves."

"Can you imagine what it would have been like with a jar of mustard?" Rarity chuckled.

"Or a ketchup bottle," Spike added.

"You and Twi wouldn't have missed high so often," Applejack said.

"How about a pickle barrel?" Rainbow said.

"Easy to hit, impossible to sink," Fluttershy replied.

"Yeah," Pinkie said, "But mayonnaise was specified."

"The point of any celebration is to be with friends and family. To commemorate the past, and gain strength to carry on into the future," Twilight told her.

"Yeah I guess," Pinkie admitted, "But if that didn't wind out at the bottom of the pond, what was sinko de mayo for?"

Next Chapter: 2) Celestia's Darkest Fears Estimated time remaining: 8 Minutes
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