“Why hello there? Just clicked on this channel while surfing the tv, I see. Well, stick around for a bit. I’m sure you’ll enjoy this show, most definitely. And you better not leave for bathroom breaks, or else!”

A tall man looked up at the sign of a local food joint he was interested in eating at. “Hmm... Qdoba? Might as well. Definitely not gonna eat that McDonald’s shit again.” He opened the front door, taking in the smell of Mexican cuisine and the style of the restaurant.

It certainly had the typical Mexican feel with a desert as the interior design. There were various mayan-esque pictures strewn strategically around the store of what appeared to be pictures drawn into rock.

“God, this place is cheesy as hell,” the man muttered under his breath, walking up to the front counter. The man seemed to be in his early twenties, with light stubble on his lean jaw along with short brown hair that look like it had never seen a comb. He was wearing a black shirt with an open gray hoodie, and it was obvious he was quite muscular. To complete the look were some worn out blue jeans and a pair of expensive Air Jordans.

“Hello, welcome to Qdoba, what can I get for you today?” A very lank and dark-skinned boy grinned as he stared at the man who was deciding what to order. His voice was full of enthusiasm, but his eyes displayed another emotion: exhaustion. Luckily for him, his visor shaded them quite well, although it wouldn’t have mattered. His eyes were so dark that they literally almost looked black. His brown Qdoba t-shirt was tucked in, making him look much more thinner, and he could not have been more than 140 pounds. He fixed the angle of his visor before reaching for a tortilla shell. After all, everyone ordered the same food anyways, since no one seemed to enjoy experimenting.

The man literally towered over the teen by a good foot. Scratching at the stubble on his chin, his brown eyes glanced over at the assortment of spicy foods. “I dunno, dude. Never ate here before, so what do ya’ recommend” the man said, his deep voice laced with the hint of a foreign accent, probably from Eastern Europe, along with a weird combination of a Southern accent.

The teen was clearly caught off guard, as he never really had much experience with new customers. Stuttering to himself, he quickly hid the tortilla shell that was in front of him behind the counter. “Uh...well, our most popular item is a queso burrito. Kinda like a regular burrito, but we add this cheese sauce in it. I may or may not be biased, but I usually douse my food in it,” he said truthfully, silently cursing himself and his awkwardness. Unlike the man, the kid had a very Caucasian accent, given that he was clearly African-American.

“Yeah, that sounds good,” the man said, nodding his head in agreement and pulling out his wallet. “How much I owe ya?”

The teen had to physically keep himself from uttering the words ‘too much’. He simply shrugged, not knowing, as he was never on register duty often. “Not entirely sure.” He proceeded to take a piping hot tortilla shell out and placed in on a piece of tin foil, resisting the urge that told him to scream as the shell burned like HELL. The man could not help but notice that he was wearing a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle bracelet.

“Woah, you like TMNT too?” the man asked with interest, pointing to the bracelet with interest and a friendly smirk.

“Eeyup! The new series is awesome!” the kid said, a little too loudly.

“Hmm... haven’t been much on Nickelodeon myself. Mainly stuck to Cartoon Network. Though there ain’t many cartoons worth watching nowadays” said the burly man with a hint of sadness.

The dark skinned boy almost tossed the spatula on the floor in protest. “Are you kidding? Nickelodeon was, and is, the best children’s network. You never watched Spongebob? Fairly Odd Parents? Danny Phantom?” he asked as he tossed various ingredients inside of the burrito.

“Oh, I have. Really liked those shows. But... I always felt Cartoon Network had the best programs,” the man admitted, shrugging his shoulder. “Foster’s Home For Imaginary Friends, Adventure Time, Samurai Jack, Ben 10, Pokemon, heck, even Powerpuff Girls. Nick just can’t compete with that.”

The kid considered spitting in the man’s food for just a brief second. “Okay, well, Pokemon is legit. Been a fan for years, but that’s beside the point. Chicken on here?” he suddenly asked, pointing to the burrito in front of him.

“Yeah, that sounds good,” the man said, crossing his arms as he looked at the burrito with a hungry expression. “But still, Cartoon Network had it all, like fun shows with superb action. But look at Nick now; all the shows on there suck balls. Ever seen Spongebob or the Fairly Odd Parents these past couple of years? Those shows have gone to hell.”

“That doesn’t change the fact that they are both decent shows. The most recent Pokemon episodes suck. They got rid of Misty! And don’t get me started on some of that show called Flapjack? That show gave me nightmares, bro.”

“Dude, the Misadventures of Flapjack was decent enough... at the beginning,” the man said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. “But hey, at least it ain’t like those shows iCarly or Victorious. God have mercy on anyone who watches them.”

“But iCarly is goo- I mean okay! Nothing wrong with it. But hey, you gotta understand those Disney idiots nowadays with their shows. Am I right?”

There was an awkward silence before both citizens bursted into uproarious laughter. They could at least both agree without words that they were better off than Disney. “Yo, what’s your name?” the kid asked as he began to roll the burrito into its beautiful, round and voluptuous self. 

“Dimitri. And I gotta admit, for a kid, you’re a pretty cool dude,” Dimitri chuckled heartily. “You have a name too?”

“Call me Deion. Burrito rolling extraordinaire...” he said amusedly as he plopped the five-pound burrito on an orange plate.

“Ain’t that a mouthful?” Literally. Dimitri laughed, picking up his tray to sit at a table nearby to eat and continue talking with Deion as he worked. It was actually rather slow today. “So, Deion, you still in school?”

“Eh, I’m a junior. Nothing special. You in college? Is it just like everyone makes it out to be–frat parties, drinking, vices galore?” he asked as he cleaned the food line.

Dimitri chuckled and cracked his neck and knuckles in preparation to pig out on his food. “You know, not everything in college is like a Van Wilder movie, although some bits are pretty close. But as for now, I’m out of college and have a real job. But hey, you still got high school to enjoy, which in my opinion is way easier than what I’m doing now.”

“Enjoy?” Deion threw his head back to amusingly laugh. “High school is a pain nowadays, bro. Drama, homework and stuff. This generation sucks. Just the other day I heard of some sixth grader getting pregnant.” He proceeded to throw his towel down right next to the cash register. “Oh, and you forgot to pay.”

“Whoops, sorry my man,” Dimitri replied, getting up to the counter. Pulling out two twenties from his wallet, he handed them over and winked. “Keep the change, kid. You earned it.”

“Thanks! Finally I can get something to eat...” Deion shouted in glee as he blissfully tossed his apron somewhere in the back room. “VANEZA!”

“QUE!?” a feminine voice shouted from behind the large door.

“I’M TAKIN’ A BREAK!” Deion screamed, not at all caring about the looks he was getting from the other employees. They all disliked him anyways.

“BIEN!” Giving a celebratory fist pump, Deion immediately got started making his burrito. He knew all the secrets of his job, and what he could and couldn’t get charged extra for. Needless to say, when he was done, his burrito was the size of a newborn. Even still, he was positive that he would be able to eat all of it. After all, he’s eaten bigger. He paid before almost skipping to sit with Dimitri.

Dimitri sat there waiting patiently for Deion to join him, not wanting to seem rude by eating first. Nodding his head and giving him an easygoing smile, he waved to his new acquaintance. “Looks like I got a lunch buddy. Hope ya don’t get sick from my eating habits. Mom always said I resemble a cross of a gator and a pig when it comes to smacking down on junk food.”

“Psh, I got this beast,” he said, motioning towards his burrito, which barely fitted on the plate. It was practically double the size of Dimitri’s. “I think it’s safe to say we’re both pigs.”

Dimitri nodded in agreement and picked up his burrito, his eyes widening suddenly when he realized something. “Shit, need something to burn my throat when I eat some burritos. Be a bro and grab some of the hottest hot sauce you guys got?”

“Anything for a customer!” Deion replied before jumping up from the table. Still decked out in his uniform, he ran behind the counter. “Shit, no habanero...” He said as he noticed the lack of the small samples. With a sigh, he ran to the back of the store, dodging cooks and their extra hot assorted food with ease as he made his way to the cooler. He felt a large chill as he opened the door.

“Man, I don’t even like spicy stuff...” he mumbled to himself, shrugging. He always had a bad habit of talking to himself. He searched the cooler up and down for any samples and sighed downtrodden when he noticed that there were none in their usual spot. He cursed to himself before looking down at the floor.

On the floor, behind the shelf entirely, was one sample of hot salsa. “Hah! Found one!” he cheered as he got down on the cold floor and reached it. Once he made sure that he had it in his hands, he jumped up without haste, as the cold and his stomach did not mix. Luckily, his hyperactivity always proved good in these types of situations.

Deion inspected the salsa, and blew a considerable amount of dust off of it. He raised his eyebrow when he realized that there was a mark on the that refused to come off no matter how hard he blew. It was swirly, almost like a dragon. “Eh. Better than nothing. It’s not like he’ll care.”

With vigor and haste, he bolted back to his awaiting burrito. Oh, and Dimitri. Can’t forget Dimitri.

Dimitri picked up the jar, inspecting it. “Discordant Hot Sauce. Guaranteed to send your tastebuds on a chaotic trip to Hell,” Dimitri read aloud from the jar’s cover. “Shit, that is the weirdest looking dragon ever. Like a mix of a bunch of animals or something. Dude who drew this was probably high on LSD or some shit like that.”

Deion looked around nervously. “Haha... yeah...” He cleared his throat. Now, normally Deion did not like spicy food at all. However, he was intent on showing off. So, without thinking, he dumped half of the damn jar into his burrito, making sure to have the hot, liquidy goodness in every single crevice of the burrito.

“Damn, can’t let you beat me now,” Dimitri chuckled, also grabbing the jar and pouring the remainder on his own burrito, the spicy aroma tickling both their noses as a strange red smoke wafted from the burritos now. Picking his own up, he smirked at Deion and said, “How about we make this interesting? I eat my burrito first, and you admit Cartoon Network is better than Nickelodeon. You beat me, and I admit Nick kicks CN’s ass. Deal?”

“Psh. Everyone who knows me knows that Deion never backs down from a challenge. EVER.” He grinned before taking off all the tin foil off of his burrito. He brought the burrito up to his mouth, but didn’t take a bite yet. “You ready for this?”

“Always ready. See ya on the other side.” Both challengers took bites off of their extremely spicy meals, their eyes bulging as the sauce hit their tongues. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a mysterious voice started chuckling evilly.

“Hope you two enjoy that other side now...” it whispered darkly. Suddenly darkness surrounded the pair, both no longer in the restaurant or eating their burritos, much to Deion’s chagrin.

“Dad? Mom said you left us, you piece of shit! Gimme my burrito!” Deion said, shaking his fist in the air as the rest of his burrito in his mouth somehow disappeared. He could still feel his stomach growling.

“Dude, I don’t think whatever that thing is is your asshole dad,” Dimitri muttered, staring at his surroundings with a confused yet scared expression. “Where the hell are we?”

“...Maybe... we’re in another dimension! Or something like that.” Deion shouted sadly, scouring the area for his lost burrito. Nothing got in the way of he and his food. NOTHING.

“Dude, forget the fucking food! This is serious! Like something outta a Sci-fi movie or something! Twilight Zone shit is going on here!” Dimitri yelled at Deion, glancing around as bright dots appeared around the two, growing more numerous and bigger in size as time passed on.

“... I find the lack of a TARDIS to be quite disturbing...”

“Dammit, kid! This ain’t a game! We could either be tripping balls, or in serious shit right now!” Dimitri said in exasperation.

“I’m kind of rooting for the former,” Deion admitted, grinning to himself slyfully.

“And unfortunately for you two, neither of those shows are on your program lists,” the sinister voice chuckled, followed by the snap of some fingers being heard from somewhere far off. Suddenly the bright orbs of light grew so bright both of them were blinded, while gravity pulled them downward through some type of portal in its drunken stupor.

“But I do hope you enjoy your new primetime showings. I heard this channel is quite good, and right up both of your alleys.” The voice broke out in laughter as Dimitri and Deion were transported elsewhere, two different portals opening up beneath them to teleport them to their new destinations.

“... Bowling?” Deion asked. He brought a hand up to his chin and squinted into the darkness curiously as he was sucked down his portal.

“Damnit, can’t you take anything seriously?” Dimitri yelled, grabbing onto thin air in vain hope of not falling down into his portal. Unfortunately for him, it didn’t work. Both disappeared from the voidal plane, the sinister voice laughing madly all the way.

The only sound that could be heard was the sound of Deion screaming like a twelve year old girl while Dimitri yelled in a much more respectable manner of at least a woman in her twenties.

“Now onto the next episode. Stay tuned, kids!”

Next Chapter: Chapter 2: Don't Change The Channel Estimated time remaining: 28 Minutes