King Sombra and Queen Chrysalis were seated on their thrones when the guards arrived with Sweetie Belle. A great crowd had assembled—all sorts of characters, as well as the whole Changeling kingdom.

Thorax was standing before them, in the middle of the courtroom, in chains, with a soldier on each side to guard him; and near King Sombra (who was playing the part of the judge) was Angel Bunny, with a trumpet in one hand and a scroll of parchment in the other.

"How do I look?" Sombra asked Chrysalis.

"Too early to say," she replied.

Sweetie Belle had never seen a courtroom before, but she was quite pleased to find that she knew the name of nearly everyone there.

She joined the audience and took a seat between Gabby and Princess Cadence.

She looked across the court at the jury box and saw that the twelve jurors were all writing very busily on slates.

"What are they doing?" Sweetie Belle whispered to Princess Cadence. "They can't have anything to write down. The trial hasn't even started yet."

"They're putting down their own names," Cadence whispered in reply, "in case they forget them by the time the trial's over."

"Stupid things!" Sweetie Belle said in an indignant whisper.

"Stupid," said one of the jurors. "How do you spell 'stupid'?" he asked his neighbor.

(Yes, he didn't know how to spell "stupid.")

"S-T-What's after 'T'?" asked another juror.

"Dinner! Is it dinnertime? It's dinner time!"

"No, it isn't!"

"I was sure it was dinnertime. My stomach feels like my throat's been cut..."

"Silence in the Court!" Angel Bunny cried out.

When the chatter would not cease, Sombra rose from his throne, and said in a booming voice, "Silence!"

And the jurors became silent.

"I'm not going to be called, am I?" Sweetie Belle asked Cadence.

"Called what?" Lyra Heartstrings asked.

"I don't want to stand up in front of all these people. Why am I here?"

"To save Thorax from a death worse than fate," Cadence replied.

"Herald of the Court, read the accusation!" King Sombra commanded.

Angel Bunny unrolled the parchment scroll and read as follows:

The Changeling Queen,

She broke some hearts,

All on a summer day.

The Knave, Thorax,

He stole those hearts,

And healed them, right away!

"I confess!" Thorax shouted. "I didn't do it! And I'm glad, glad, glad I didn't do it! And if I had my time again, I probably still wouldn't do it."

"An open and shut case," said Queen Chrysalis.

"That can't be right," Sweetie Belle said.

"Did you say something?" King Sombra asked.

"No, Your Majesty,"

"Members of the jury, consider your verdict," King Sombra said.

"Not yet!" Angel Bunny interrupted.

"And why not?" King Sombra asked.

"There's a great deal more to come before you can say that!"

"That's odd," said Chrysalis. "Not to say strange."

Pharynx stood up and addressed the court.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it's obvious the accused is guilty," he said. "Put aside the evidence and look at his face... It is the face of a habitual criminal. A hardened felon, a recalcitrant rogue!"

Another Changeling, Cornicle by name, cleared her throat and Pharynx shouted, "What is it?"

"We're lawyers for the defense!" she said.

"Oh! I, err... rest my case," Pharynx finished.

"Call the first witness," said King Sombra.

"Call the first witness!" Angel Bunny called out.

The Changeling guards repeated this half a dozen times before the witness actually appeared.

It was the Pink Hatter.

She came running in with a teacup in one hand and a piece of chocolate cake in the other.

"Good day," she told the Queen.

"Good day," the Queen replied.

"Snap!" the Hatter exclaimed. "I beg pardon, Your Majesties, for bringing these in; but I hadn't quite finished my party when I was sent for."

"She never finishes her parties," Sweetie Belle whispered to Cadence.

"It isn't healthy, all that cake," Cadence said. "Look at her buns!"

"I can't,"

"That's what she means," said another member of the audience. "She's got a case of 'the buns.' Some of the worst I've ever seen. And I've seen a few in my time."

"You're a fine one to talk, Sun-butt!" the Hatter retorted.

"You ought to have finished," said King Sombra. "When did you begin?"

"I'll have to ask Mr. Sandwich,"

"Send for him!" Sombra shouted.

The Hatter looked to her left at Cheese Sandwich, who had suddenly appeared in the witness box, arm-in-arm with Gummy.

"I hadn't finished my sentence," Sombra whispered to Chrysalis.

"You haven't passed one yet, Your Majesty," Cheese Sandwich said.

"Oh, that's right," Sombra replied.

"When did we start the party?" Pinkie asked Cheese. "The fourteenth of March, I think it was. Wasn't it?"

"No, the fifteenth," Cheese Sandwich replied.

"Sixteenth," said Gummy.

"Write that down," Sombra growled to the jury. "Fourteen, fifteen, and sixteen."

The jury eagerly wrote down all three dates on their slates.

"Now, add, subtract, multiply, divide, and convert to pounds and ounces," Sombra told them. "What's the answer?"

"They're slow," Chrysalis told him.

"They should be able to do it in their heads," he replied.

"Off with them,"

Sombra looked back at the Pink Hatter.

"That hat!" he shouted. "Take it off!"

"What?" Pinkie asked.

"Disrespect of this Court! Take off your hat!"

"And her head with it," added Queen Chrysalis.

"I can't, Your Honor," said the Hatter.

"Why can't you take it off, pray?" Sombra inquired.

"It isn't mine,"

"Stolen!" King Sombra exclaimed, turning to the jury, who instantly made a memorandum of the fact. "Stolen hat, one. This woman is a self-confessed thief! And she has the gall to come into this court as a character witness!"

"Sombra seems very prejudiced," Sweetie Belle whispered.

"Why, thank you," Sombra told her. "Aside from being a pompous, bad-tempered old tyrant, it's really the only thing that makes me eminently qualified to be a judge."

Queen Chrysalis began staring hard at the Pink Hatter, who turned pale and fidgeted.

"Don't I know you?" she asked Pinkie.

"I keep them to sell," the Pink Hatter added as an explanation. "I sell hats. I've none of my own. I'm a hatter."

"Then why didn't you say so?" Sombra asked. "That's the first thing you should have said. Now. Give your evidence, and don't be nervous, or I'll have you executed on the spot!"

This did not help the witness at all. She kept shifting from one foot to the other, looking uneasily at the Queen of the Changelings, and in her confusion, she bit a large piece out of her teacup instead of the cake.

"I'm not nervous. I've nothing to hide. Done my duty, served my country,"

All this time, the Queen had never stopped staring at the Hatter, and sneered, "I do know you!"

"Hatter! Your evidence!" Sombra repeated angrily. "Or I'll have you executed, whether you are nervous or not!"

"He's just making it worse," Sweetie Belle told Gabby. "Stay calm, Pinkie Pie!"

"I'm a poor woman, Your Majesty," the Hatter began, in a trembling voice, "and I haven't had my tea—and what with the sandwiches getting ruined after being eaten once, the cake getting so thin—and the twinkling of the teacups—"

"Twinkling?" Sombra repeated.

"You're the 'Twinkler'!" Chrysalis shouted. "I remember you now! You sang at my last concert! 'Twinkle, twinkle, little...'"

Then Cheese Sandwich picked up his accordion and started playing while Pinkie sang.

"Twinkle, twinkle little gnat. How I wonder what you're at. You are very small indeed, you can vanish up my sleeve. Up my sleeve, up my sleeve. You can vanish up my sleeve!"

And the courtroom burst into thunderous applause.

"We don't do encores," Pinkie said.

"But we're available for birthdays, weddings and funerals," Cheese Sandwich added.

"You did sing at my concert. But this was even worse!" Chrysalis shouted.

"I've been practicing," the Hatter replied.

"It's an offense against all we hold dear! Sombra, this pink airhead ruined my concert just as she's ruining your trial!"

"Sire, I'm a poor woman," the Hatter repeated. "I stand before you full of remorse and malnutrition. When Mr. Cheese Sandwich said—"

"I did not!" Cheese Sandwich interrupted in a great hurry.

"You did!" said the Pink Hatter.

"I deny it!"

"He denies it," said King Sombra. "Leave out that part!"

"I object!" the Pink Hatter shouted.

"Objection denied!" Sombra yelled.

"Ask Gummy," the Pink Hatter said.

"Ask Gummy what?" Sombra asked.

"I can't remember," the Pink Hatter replied.

"You must remember," Sombra remarked, "or I'll have you executed."

"Stand your ground, Pinkie!" Sweetie Belle shouted.

The Pink Hatter miserably put down her teacup and her cake and dropped to one knee.

"I'm a very poor woman, Your Majesty!" she cried.

"And an even poorer actress!" Sombra shouted.

At this, one off the jurors cheered.

"Suppress that cheering!" Sombra shouted.

And the juror was removed by the bailiff.

"If that's all you know, you may stand down," Sombra told the Hatter.

"Well, I can't get down any lower, I'm on the floor as it is," she replied.

"Then you may go," Sombra continued.

"Would you like another chorus of 'Twinkle'?"

"GO!" Chrysalis screamed.

And she and Cheese Sandwich hurriedly left the court.

"Take her head off outside!" she added to one of the officers.

But the Hatter was gone before the officer could get to the door.

"Call the next witness!" Sombra shouted.

"What about me?" Thorax interjected.

"What about you?" Angel Bunny asked him.

"I'm the accused! All you do is call witnesses! It's not fair. I should have the most important part here. I haven't had a word for paragraphs and paragraphs..."

"What did you want to say?" Chrysalis asked.

"I'd just like you to know that I have no need to steal," he replied. "I'm independently wealthy. I have all the money and love I need for the rest of my life."

"Thorax is an idiot," Chrysalis whispered to Sombra.

"He's your offspring!" he whispered back.

The next witnesses arrived and Sweetie Belle could guess who they were even before they even entered the court. The guards near the door began sneezing all at once.

"My cooks!" Cadence exclaimed. "How dare they!"

One of them was carrying the pepper shaker in her hand, hence all the sneezing guards in the hall.

She and her husband (the other cook) ascended to the witness box and she firmly slammed her pepper shaker on the table in front of them.

"Give your evidence," said Sombra.

"Shan't!" the female cook replied.

"'Shan't'?" Sombra echoed.

"Shan't!" she repeated. "Shan't!"

Sombra looked anxiously at Angel Bunny and asked, "What now?"

"Your Majesty must cross-examine the witness," he said.

"Well, if I must, I must," Sombra said. "What are the tarts made of?" he asked in his normal, deep voice.

"Pepper, mostly," said the cook.

"Treacle," said a sleepy voice from the jury box.

"What did he say?" Sombra asked.

"Treacle," it repeated.

"Collar that Alligator!" Chrysalis shrieked. "He's no right to be here! Off with his teeth!"

The court was in confusion for a minute, and by the time they had settled down again, the cooks had disappeared.

"Call the next witness!" Sombra shouted.

Angel Bunny cried out, at the top of his shrill little voice, "Sweetie Belle!"