Time Turner's shop is right in front of my face. It's so close that as a breath leaves my nose, the glass window fogs up slightly. I've been here for five minutes, trying to work up the nerve to go inside the clock-invested building. So far, nothing has worked.

I weigh my options as I see Time on the inside, back turned to the window, doing something with a watch. Going in there and merely talking to him could lead to any number of possible outcomes, and being the paranoid and insecure wuss I am I keep thinking about the worst ones.

The fact that Turner could be mad about what went down last night is also cause for hesitation. Then again he might not be, so now I'm back to breathing on the windows like a moron.

Then again, if my plan works I could end up with a date.

And if it doesn't…

Okay, screw this. I'm going in.

My hoof finds the door and pushes it open about two seconds before my courage leaves me. I want to run back out immediately, but my legs lock up.

"Hello Rider." Turner looks up at me. He isn't smiling, but he isn't frowning either. I'm not sure if that's a good thing, or a bad thing.

He looks about the same as last night, only there are even more bags under his eyes. Briefly I wonder how long it's been since he last slept. Then I put my plan into action.

"Hey…" I say smoothly, walking inside. "So I was just in the neighborhood and figured–"

"Derpy told me something very interesting last night," Turner cuts me off. He's leering at me.

I blink. The plan has been shattered dramatically. "O-oh yeah?"

Turner sets down the watch he is working on and crosses to me. "Yeah."

Oh buck.

"Look Time, there's a very reasonable explanation for this…" I say.

"You said you fixed it," he reminds me.

"Yeah… I lied."

Smack!

I recoil, my cheek stinging brutally. Turner has one hell of a right hook.

"I deserved that," I mumble.

"You deserve a lot more than that," Turner tells me. "Derpy is in love with Lightning Dust! Do you not realize how royally you bucked up?"

"I know, okay?" I shout. "But what the hell was I supposed to do? The mare was crying on the bathroom floor, Turner."

"That's no excuse," the chestnut stallion reprimands. "You told her she has a chance with Lightning. When she finds out that Dust isn't gay, crying on the bathroom floor will seem like a dance party."

"Don't you think you're over reacting?" I ask. Surely it won't be that bad.

Turner sighs. "Look Rider," he speaks, voice low. "You don't know this, but Derpy was in a seriously committed relationship before. When it ended… she took it really rough."

"How rough?" I ask.

"She didn't leave her bedroom for four weeks. I had to look after Dinky for her while she did literally nothing but cry for a month. It got to the point where she stopped eating. She wouldn't even touch a muffin, Rider." He leans in really close to me. "I don't want Derpy to feel that way ever again, you understand me?"

"Turner, believe me when I say I don't want her to feel that way either." He leans back, no longer giving me a death glare. "I don't like seeing her cry, that's why I chickened out when I should have told her Dust isn't gay. I'm sorry."

Turner looks away ruefully. "The minute you told me Lightning is straight I should have told Derpy. It would have been rough for her, but not that rough. Instead I didn't. I chickened out too." He turns his gaze back to me. "Rider, I hate what you're doing – and I really hate to say this – but I guess I understand why you did it."

"There's no way that this will end well for any of us, is there?" I ask. Leave it to me to ask a question we already know the depressing answer to.

"Unless we can keep Lightning Dust in a more permanent state of drunkenness than Berry Punch, I don't think so," he replies.

"Yeah, not much chance of that happening," I say. "Do you think they've found out by now?"

He shakes his head. "No. Lightning stopped by with my mail earlier today. They running separate post routes today, so they won't see each other most likely.

We shift around awkwardly for a moment.

"Oh, uh… why did you stop by anyways?" Turner asks.

I blink. Oh right, my half-assed plan. "I was just wondering if you wanted to grab some lunch… you know… together?"

His eyebrow rises. "Are you asking me out on a date, Rider?"

"Rather poorly, but yes."

"After everything you've done, you honestly think I'll say yes?"

"I'm stupidly optimistic," I reply rather bluntly. "Or optimistically stupid."

"I'd say you're both," he tells me. My ears flop downward. "But I could use some food, so I tentatively accept your offer."

My eyes widen, my whole body perking up. "Really?" I can't believe it. "You'll go on a date with me?"

"It's not a date," Turner firmly tells me. "I'm just hungry is all."

"I'm still going to call it a date," I let him know. He sighs.

"Then I guess it's only fair to tell you that I am not sexually attracted to you at all."

I frown a little. "Oh… so you're not gay then?"

"Actually, I'm bisexual," Turner moves toward the door and I begin following him. "I'm just honestly not into you that way."

Ouch. It would have been one thing if he hadn't been gay, but to actually like dudes and still not find me attractive? Yeah, that hurt worse than the slap.

"I'm still calling this a date," I say, trying to not let my disappointment show. After all, I'm supposed to be both stupidly optimistic, and optimistically stupid.

"In that case, you're buying," he laughs.

Crap.