Cold showers were my least favorite things to do in the morning. In fact, they ranked pretty high on my all time list of least favorite things, just above getting electrocuted. But this morning, I couldn't deny how badly I needed one.

I'd woken up around four a.m. last night, and because life just loves to hate me I hadn't gotten any sleep since. Needless to say, that made me more than a little tired. After spending the better part of the morning arguing with myself, I'd finally agreed to suffer through one.

Now I slowly turned the knob in my shower to off, my body shivering ferociously. I launched out, grabbing a towel and patting myself dry. My mane was still soaking wet, so I wrapped the towel around my head and decided that would be enough.

I left the bathroom shortly after. It was already half past ten, so getting breakfast at this point wouldn't be the best idea with Derpy's picnic in less than two hours. In fact I should probably head out soon. I had no idea how long it would take to get to Ponyville –all I had was a general direction to fly in.

Planning on leaving I walked through my bedroom. Luckily I remembered to take the towel off my head before walking out the door. My white mane was still damp, but I figured enough flying would dry it out before too long. I threw the used towel onto my bed haphazardly.

The act of looking at my bed vaguely forces me to acknowledge its stark emptiness. Truth be told I was getting rather sick of that. It had been nearly two and a half weeks since my last fling. In my books, that was too long to go without bucking a dude.

I took off flying, leaving my house behind. My destination was Lightning Dust's apartment, even though I couldn't really remember how to get there. It wasn't hard to find; all I had to do was look for the shittiest place in Cloudsdale.

I landed just outside the apartment complex, the smell somehow worse now than what it was on Wednesday. I took a deep breath in through my mouth and walked inside.

There was a receptionist waiting in the lobby. Prior to my arrival she had been flipping through an outdated magazine and scratching a rather… unmentionable part of her body. It seemed she was just sleazy enough to work in a place like this.

When I walked in her blue eyes lit up in surprise and she worked to make herself look presentable. I found this a little odd; it was not what I expected her to do at all. I got the vibe that she usually treated ponies with varying degrees of irritation.

"Hi," she says politely, giving me a quick glance over and a smile. "What can I do for you?"

"I'm just here looking for a friend," I reply stopping in front of her desk. "Maybe you can help me, cause I'm not sure what her room number is."

"Yeah absolutely," the orange mare says, reaching for something. "Let me just grab the tenant listings. What's her name?"

"Lightning Dust," I say.

"Okay, no problem," she says, glancing up at me and then looking down at the list. "So is she like your marefriend or something?"

"Lightning? No, she's not really my type," I reply casually. The orange receptionist smiles like she just won the Wonderbolt's Derpy and leans closer to me.

"Really? Well, what is your type then?" She says, a hint of sultriness in her voice.

It finally cracks through my thick skull that she's flirting with me. It gives me a slightly mean idea. I lean in close to her so that our muzzles were barely an inch apart. Smiling, I say, "Male and breathing."

The orange mare stiffens, cheeks flushing red. "O-oh. Okay then." I can tell she feels immensely awkward right now, so I fight the urge to cackle with laughter. "Uh… It says Lightning is down that hall. Should be the third door on your right."

"Thanks," I say, grinning more than I probably should. The receptionist looks like she wants to crawl underneath her desk. Vaguely, I wonder if I shouldn't use my sexuality to make other ponies uncomfortable.

Lightning's door – and I use that term very loosely – is partially cracked open when I reach it. I knock as gently as I dare, but it still starts to slide open anyways.

"Hey, Lightning, you here?" I call out. A muffled groan answers me. Walking inside I find her lying face down in her bed. "Hey, get up." I tell her.

"Too tired," she mutters.

"It's practically eleven," I say. "And you've been lying in bed all day. How are you still tired?"

Lightning rolls over, the bags under her eyes very noticeable. "Because sleeping on this cloud is like sleeping on a sack of rocks."

Well there's a sentence that has never been uttered before, I think to myself. To Lightning I say, "Don't you want to get to the picnic soon?"

"I guess," she mumbles into the cloud bed.

"Still nervous about touching the ground for the first time?" I ask. She weakly nods. "Well let me put it to you this way," I say. "On the ground right now is our friend Derpy with a basket of free food, and the possibility of a job."

This causes Lightning's head to drift off her shoddy mattress. "Okay."

She rolls off the bed and lands on the floor with a thud. I flinch at the impact. Clouds were not supposed to make thud noises. It only reaffirmed my decision to get Lightning out of here as fast as possible. I bend down and help her up.

"Thanks," she says, rubbing the back of her head.

We leave Lightning's room, the aqua marine mare slamming her door closed. As we exit the building, the receptionist noticeably avoids eye contact with me, which of course causes a little smirk to crawl onto my face.

Outside, I unfurl my wings, and Lightning follows suit. We lift off, and I notice the simple act of flying seems to have an affect on my friend. Her sleepiness is battered away and she swoops around in the sky gracefully. With a deep breath she soaks in the fresh morning air and climbs to a higher altitude. I flap harder to catch up.

"Well somepony's certainly feeling plucky," I remark as we pass over the edge of Cloudsdale. Lightning smiles.

"Yeah," she replies. "It's crazy but… I almost forgotten how good flying feels."

"Haven't been doing a lot of it lately?" I ask with a raised eyebrow.

"I haven't been doing much of anything lately," she admits. "Sans drinking."

"Yeah I hear that," I reply. "Lately it feels like nothing significant happens to me unless it's at that bar."

"It's kinda why I'm looking forward to this picnic," she says. "I need a change of scenery."

My stomach grumbles. "I just need some food," I reply. "I skipped breakfast this morning."

Lightning stomach growls, giving mine a run for its money. "So did I," she mentions. "And… dinner last night."

I suddenly feel guilty about being hungry. "Was my loan any help?" I wonder aloud.

"It got me a few meals worth of fast food," Lightning says. "I swear I'll pay you back every bit I owe."

"Nah, you don't have to," I reply.

"Yes I do," Lightning affirms. "Otherwise it's charity, and you know how I feel about that."

"Fine, fine," I mutter. "Be a stubborn mule and insist on giving me money. See if I care." I did actually. I hated the idea of Lightning feeling that she owed me.

"So where's this town we're going to?" Lightning asks, having already forgot the name.

"Ponyville," I remind her. Pointing with my hooves southward I say, "Somewhere in that direction."

"Got it," she says. Without wasting a second, Lightning catapults herself forward. The wind generated by this is enough to knock me back a few feet. When I recover, I see Lightning Dust already halfway to the horizon.

"Holy shit!" I shout in earnest shock. In the distance, Lightning looks back and stops. She's back next to me in the span of four seconds.

"Sorry," she says. "Sometimes I forget my own speed."

"Damn Lightning, you left me in the dust," I say. "That was just… wow."

Lightning blushes at my fanfare. We begin flying, this time she let me set the pace. "It wasn't that impressive."

"You bucking kidding?" I ask. "I'm no expert, but I'd say you went from zero to a eleven wingpower in the blink of an eye. In mid-air to boot."

"Like I said, not that impressive," Lightning says. "Normally I do better than that."

"No bucking way," I say.

"I'm serious. I can do better than that when I'm not so tired and hungry," she replies, swerving to avoid a wayward cloud. "Wait, can't you do that?"

"Absolutely not!" I say. "I'm lucky to hit eight wingpower when I'm at my best. I think the fastest weather worker I know can barely hit ten, and that's after a gravity assisted plunge dive."

"Really?" Lightning says dubiously. "I'd always thought most pegasi were better than that."

"Like hell we are," I tell her. "Have you ever measured your wingpower?"

"No, my dad could never get the right equipment for it," she says. "But I always wanted to know."

"You're probably off the charts," I say. My vision suddenly hones in on a series of small buildings on the ground. I begin to descend and Lightning follows me.

"You really think so?" Lightning asks.

"Hell yeah," I tell her. "You could take frickin' gold at the Equestia Games."

Lightning smiles at the thought of that. We're hovering about five feet from the ground now, and I begin looking around. "You see a lake anywhere around here?"

"Hang on a sec," she tells me. I'm about to ask why, but she rockets up into the sky again. She's down a second later, just like she said.

"I found it." Lightning grabs my hoof and suddenly we're zooming through town. We blow past a newsstand, launching the papers into a cluttered mess. The mane's of ponies whip aside as Lightning flies by. I find myself impressed again, seeing as how she's dragging me as dead weight and still going fast.

A lake speeds into view and Lightning mercifully slows down, coming to a halt. I slide onto the ground, my white mane blown into a completely new style from Lightning's flight. As I work to straighten it, I notice Lightning hasn't landed yet.

"Nervous?" I ask. She glances at the ground with uncertainty. I pat the green blades with my hooves. "Don't worry Lightning, grass can't hurt you."

Biting her lip, she lowers herself a few inches, then immediately flies back up before she comes close. I groan. "Lightning Dust, you're touching the ground, not loosing your virginity. Just do it and be done already."

"Don't rush me!" She yells back.

"All right fine," I say, lying down. "I'm gonna take a nap then." My eyes close. "I'll probably wake up long before you get close."

"Not funny, Rider," she tells me. I don't respond, except for a subtle snoring noise. Lightning pokes me. "Seriously dude, not cool,"

"Maybe if you were on the ground I would wake up," I tell her. I don't hear a response for a while. Then Lightning nudges me indignantly.

"Rider," she says. "Grass feels weird on my hooves."

My eyes jut open and I see four aqua-marine hooves firmly planted on Earth's grassy surface. I smile widely

"Congratulations," I say. "You've just done what thousands of ponies do everyday."

"Don't ruin the moment with your sarcasm," Lightning says, "Come on, I think I see Derpy waiting for us."

I hop to all fours and glance around. About a quarter of the way around the lake I spotted the red checkerboard pattern of a picnic blanket. There were two ponies already there.

"Let's go," I say, brushing the clinging grass from my coat. Lightning gets into a take off position, but I hold out a foreleg to stop her. "Why don't we walk there?" I suggest. "Unless you think you can't handle it."

She responds to my challenge very maturely and hits my shoulder. After a sharp under-the-breath cursing, I start walking. Lightning is a little more tentative, almost like she has to force herself to push each hoof forward. Each time her hoof touches the ground I get the feeling she expects it to sink down slightly, like it does on clouds.

We near the picnic blanket and Derpy waves to us. I take note of the second pony sitting by her. He was a chestnut brown Earth pony with a green tie on. Curiosity takes hold and I could tell Lightning was feeling the same. Though she might not have been thinking quite the same thing as me.

Damn, he's hot.

Derpy happily bounds up to us. "Hey Lightning. Hey Rider."

"Hi Derpy, good to see you," Lightning says. Derpy smiles and brushes some of her blonde mane behind her ear. The chestnut stallion walks up to us.

"Oh," Derpy remembers. "Guys, I hope it's okay if I invited another friend of mine to eat with us."

"Of course it is," Lightning says, happy for an opportunity to make a third friend.

"Nice to meet you both," the stallion says, his voice like butter. "My name is Time Turner."

"Good to meet you. I'm Lightning Dust." She offers a hoof and Time Turner shakes it. He turns to me.

"Hi, I'm Dawn Rider," I say shaking his hoof. The next thing I say stupidly rolls out before I could stop it. "You're really sexy."

"What?" Time Turner says.

"What?" I echo.

"What?" Derpy says looking at me.

"What?" Lightning says doing the same.

"What?" I reiterate.

There's a very long, very awkward silence that follows. The back of my neck breaks out in a cold sweat as I mentally shoot myself in the head.

"Uh… I'm sorry, I must have misheard you. What did you just say?" Time Turner asks.

"I said what," I reply.

"No, before that," Time Turner specifies.

"I also said what," I say, begging for the topic to be dropped.

"Before that," Time Turner says, irritated now.

With a sigh I say, "I… called you sexy."

"Ah," Time Turner replies, expression unreadable. "So I did hear you correctly."

My yellow face is beet red by now. "Can we just pretend I never said that?"

"No, I don't think that's possible," Time Turner says. "But… for your sake I'll pretend I never heard it."

I breathe with relief. "Thank you."

"I definitely heard it," Lightning says.

"Me too," Derpy adds.

"Shut up both of you," I say through clenched teeth. All three of them laugh. I would be glad we were getting along, but I'm not considering it's at my expense.

"You guys ready to eat?" Time asks, gesturing to the picnic.

"Hell yeah," Lightning says. She's the first one to sit down. Derpy giggles at her enthusiasm and begins to grab out food. Her choice of snack doesn't surprise me.

"Blueberry muffins?" Lightning asks. "That's an interesting choice for lunch."

"Yeah," Derpy says with a slight blush. "I just… really like muffins. I hope that's okay."

"Of course it is," Lightning says, ecstatic. "I love muffins!"

"Really?" Derpy asks, surprised.

"Yeah, they were practically the only thing I would eat as a kid," Lightning says, digging into one.

"Wow," Derpy says. "I guess that's something we have in common." She inches closer to Lightning, and brushes her hair out of her face again. Lightning notices this and starts to raise an eyebrow.

"So, Turner," I say changing the subject before we got into dangerous territory. "What do you do for a living?"

"I work with clocks," he says. "Building and repairing mostly."

"You make it sound like you don't do anything," Derpy says. "When we both know you spend practically every hour of the day cooped up in that tiny workshop of yours."

"Not every hour," Turner replies with mock offense. Derpy rolls her out of sync eyes as Time Turner turns to me. "She thinks I don't get out enough."

"I bet you don't," I say. He huffs.

"So what do you do, Dawn?"

"You can just call me Rider," I say. Nopony called me by my first name, mostly cause I hated it. So why it sound so great when Turner said it? Maybe I should let him call me by it. Suddenly I become aware that I still have a question to answer. "I just work as a supervisor at the Weather Factory."

"Really? I would think that with your Cutie Mark you'd have a different line of work."

I glance back to the silhouetted pony on my flank in the middle of dancing. Wait, does this mean Turner was staring at my plot?

"It's kinda hard to make it as a dancer," I reply. "Especially since I mostly do interpretive."

"I'm sure you could make it," Derpy says. "Have you ever actually tried?"

"I auditioned for a few musicals," I reply.

Lightning takes a break from inhaling her second muffin. "Wow, a gay guy in a musical. How are you that much of a stereotype?"

"Be quiet," I demand.

"Did you make it into any?" Turner asks, ignoring the interruption.

"I did two back in college," I say. "Manespray and Robin Hoof."

"Wait, Robin Hoof?" Derpy asks. "I think I saw that one."

"Was it at the Cloudsdale Community College Theater?" I ask with slight nervousness.

She gasps. "Yes! You were the Sheriff of Trottingham weren't you?"

"Yeah," I groan.

Derpy claps with delight. "I remember! You were so good. Though I thought your costume was... let's say hilariously bad."

"It wasn't supposed to be," I say going for a muffin. "It was supposed to be a serious representation of medieval clothing."

"Well it wasn't, especially not with those unflattering tights."

Lightning Dust erupts with laughter. "You wore tights?!"

The blood under my cheeks burns. "I said be quiet, or I'll shove your muffin up your ass!"

"Hey, don't disrespect my muffin!" Derpy says. At first I think she meant the food she made for us, but the slight tinting of her cheeks tells me 'muffin' might have been a cute little nickname for somepony.

I think I'm the only one to pick up on this, as Lightning is still howling with laughter, and Time Turner is fighting to suppress his own.

"Well," Turner says with the slightest chuckle. "You'll have to let me know when your next musical is. I've just got to see it."

"Don't expect it to be soon," I mumble into my muffin. "I'm not exactly Bridleway material."

"Don't feel bad Rider," Lightning says, coming down from her laughter high. "In all seriousness you probably could make it if you tried."

"Thanks," I reply. It was nice to have a little support, even if those old dreams had died years ago. "So Derpy, you got anything besides muffins?"

Derpy checks the basket. "A few daisy sandwiches if you're up for them."

I nod, as does Time Turner.

"I'm good with just the muffins," Lightning says. "Derpy, did you make these yourself?"

"Yeah," Derpy says, a little bashful as she hands me a sandwich. She tosses the other over to Turner, who gracefully drops it on the ground.

"Well they're wonderful. You're an amazing cook." Lightning tells her, working on muffin number four.

Derpy goes into a full on blush from that one compliment. I feel like I should interject before something goes south, but I'm already biting into the sandwich.

"I'm glad you like them," the gray pegasus says. "If you ever want them again I'd love to bake some more for you."

"I may just have to take you up on that offer," Lightning Dust says, licking the crumbs from her hooves and going for a fifth. I'd make a comment about the excessive eating, but considering Dust hasn't had food in Celestia knows how long I save my breath.

"It's such a nice day," I remark instead. "I wish I'd brought a Frisbee or something."

"We could always race if you want to do something physical," Lightning suggests.

"Oh sure, because that's fair," Time Turner laments. "Three pegasi and an Earth pony in a race. I wonder who doesn't stand a chance."

"It's not like Derpy and I have much hope for winning," I tell him. "Dust is practically a professional athlete."

"Really?" Turner asks, looking at her in modest admiration. "That's impressive."

"Well, not exactly," Lightning says with a slight downtrodden tone.

"Oh quit the self-pity party," I call out. "I've seen what you can do, and I guarantee the Bolt's will be knocking down your door and demanding you join them before too long."

She offers a smile, but dives for another muffin. Turner looks at me.

"What am I missing here?" He whispers to me.

"The Wonderbolt's Academy kicked her out," I whisper back. Time's expression shows he knows not to press the issue.

"So who's up for that race?" I ask, hoping to lift Lightning's spirits a little.

"I'll do it," Derpy says. "I've got to see just how fast you can go, Lightning."

"Okay sure," she replies, leaving her fifth muffin halfway finished. I cram the rest of the sandwich in my mouth.

"I'm going to sit this one out," Time decides. "But I'll at least be the referee."

"Sounds good," I say. I dig a line in the dirt. "We'll do a lap around the lake, starting and finishing here."

"Okay," Lightning says, stretching her wings in preparation. All three of us take up our starting positions.

"Ready…" Time Turner says. "Set… Go!"

Lightning takes off like a bullet, kicking up the dirt near Derpy and me. I spit, and wipe my eyes. I'm in the air right after Derpy. Glancing, I see Lightning already at the halfway point.

As impressed as I am, I keep going. Derpy and I round the corner, and we end up neck and neck for the rest of the race. When we finally reach the finish line, Lightning is reclining on the ground.

Derpy pulls ahead of me at the last possible second, leaving me to cross last.

"Nice job guys," Lightning says a little snarky. "I have to admit, I was on the edge of my seat wondering who would get second place."

"Ha ha," I mutter, a decent amount of sweat on my face. Derpy hovers over to Lightning.

"You were amazing," she says, just a little short of breath. "I've never seen anypony move that fast."

"Thanks Derpy," Lightning says. "You did pretty great yourself."

The gray mare's face was already red from exertion, but I was willing to bet there was a blush hidden in there.

"Any food left?" Lightning asks Time, who was closest to the picnic basket. He checks.

"Just your half-eaten muffin," he replies.

Lightning goes over and pops it in her mouth.

"She's pretty hungry today," Derpy observes.

"Yeah, she uh… skipped breakfast," I say, leaving out the rest.

"Well that isn't right," Derpy declares as she walks over to Lightning. "Still hungry?" she asks, knowing the answer.

"Just a little," Lightning says, realizing how much she'd eaten so far.

"If you want, we can head over to my house and bake some more muffins," Derpy offers.

"Really?" Lightning asks, surprised by the offer. Derpy nods. "Sounds awesome, let's do it!"

Realizing the situation could take a turn for the worse if those two were alone, I decide I need to go too. "Mind if I tag along?" I ask.

"Sure," Derpy says. "I bet my daughter would love to meet the Sheriff of Tights-ingham." I groan loudly while Lightning laughs. Derpy turns to the fourth member of our party. "Time Turner, do you want to come too?"

"Sounds like fun," he says with a light smile.

"All right, let's go!" Lightning yells, taking off.

"Wait Lightning, you don't know were I live!" Derpy calls out, flying after her.

I decide to walk after them alongside Time Turner. He looks at me and says, "You know, Derpy didn't tell me she'd gotten a marefriend."

"Marefriend?" I ask. "Oh, you mean Lightning. No, they're not uh… dating."

"Really?" Time Turner replied. "That's not the impression I've been getting based on how Derpy's acting around her."

"Yeah," I respond. "She's just a little infatuated is all."

"More than a little," Time replies.

I'm silent for a moment. "Turner?" I ask. "Can you keep a secret?"

"Depends on what that secret is, Rider," he replies.

"Lightning Dust isn't gay," I tell him.

"What?" Turner asks, his pupils widening. "But Derpy said they met in a gay bar! If she was straight why would she be in one of those?"

"Long ass story, that's why," I reply. "But please don't tell Derpy."

"How can I not tell Derpy?" Turner asks. "She's one of my best friends, and I can't have her be led on like this."

"She's not being led on," I justify. "You've got nothing to worry about." He gave me a look displaying absolutely no faith. "Look, Derpy will stay infatuated for a little while, realize dating Lightning won't be in her best interest, and move on."

Time Turner shakes his head. "Uh-uh, I know Derpy, and that's not how she works. She's falling for her, Rider, and it won't end well."

I cringe inwardly. "Isn't there a chance my plan will work?"

"Not a snowball's in hell," Turner says. "But for your sake and hers, I hope I'm wrong."