Celestia "What do you know about Company One?" I asked Contra. "They're the brains of the operation. Everything that goes down is completely their idea." he answered angrily. "What's your problem?" I asked. "You seem very upset." "Yes, I'm upset. I have to work with you." "What's wrong with me?" "You're Equestrian filth! Do you have any clue how degrading it is for Mother to have to ask you for help?" "You hold her in very high regards." I said. "You should look at her differently. Sure she's powerful, but she's not above everything else." "Maybe not everything, but changelings are definitely above you ponies." "Quite proud, aren't you?" "Of course." "Pride goeth before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall." I quoted. "You should talk, Miss 'I'll be surprised if this takes us more than a day'" "That's not just me being proud or arrogant, it's the truth. I don't think this'll take us too long." "Okay, Celestia. What do we do now?" he asked. "It's Princess Celestia." I said angrily. "Remember: Pride goeth before destruction." he said. "I'm not being proud nor am I being arrogant. I didn't make you bow, did I?" "Yes, thank you for that. What a humble princess you are." he said, rolling his eyes. "Is this really the time or the place to discuss how conceited we may or may not be?" "Probably not." I said, scratching my head. "Let's get down to business. First Company. They're upstairs, right?" "Should be. What do you intend to do?" "Confuse and disorient the planning process." I said, making my way upstairs. "I need your help. I won't fit in." "No, you won't. Just keep your mouth shut and let me deal with it." said Contra, hopping on the stairs in front of me. We walked upstairs, where a group of thirty changelings were huddled around, discussing the rebellion. "Is everything ready?" asked one. "Not quite yet. Company Four doesn't think we're ready to take her down without getting noticed, and Company Three is still preparing. I think we'll need two more days." answered another. "Atten-tion!" called Contra. All of the changelings snapped to attention and saluted. "I am Captain Contra! I've been reassigned to First Company! Who was formerly in charge?" "That was me, sir!" said one. "Lieutenant Thorax!" "What have you done thus far?" he asked. "We've put Operation Checkmate in place, sir! We're just waiting for the other companies to give us the ready, sir!" "Well, run me through the plan." "Second Company will wait until the Queen is in the throne room, then move in. After they apprehend her, she'll be heavily sedated and delivered as PC to Third Company. Company Three will then carry out Operation Checkmate, where she will be secured to a post at the castle. From there, she will be stabbed, sliced, burned and otherwise tortured until her execution. After she is killed, Fourth Company will broadcast a message to the Equestrians, letting them know that the Queen met with a terrible accident. When they come to our aid, we will move on to Equestria and the Crystal Empire." reported Thorax. "Hm. She won't be in the throne room." said Contra. "Why not, sir?" "Pvt. Contorta will explain." replied Contra, gesturing to me. "Um… She's thought to be visiting with Twilight Sparkle to review the terms of the truce." I reported. "It will be quite a few days before she returns." "That'll be fine, sir, we're not ready just yet anyway." "Er… When she returns, Twilight Sparkle will most likely be with her. I don't think our forces can withstand an attack from her." I said, desperately trying to convince them. "All of our combined might will surely be enough to overtake the little unicorn princess." "What if she brings her daughters? They're a force to be reckoned with." "Are you joking?" asked Thorax. "You can't be serious. They're just unicorns. Nothing we can't deal with." "I've seen them in action. They're more powerful than us, I know it. We should devise an alternate plan." I tried. "You're starting to sound like an Equestrian." said Thorax, grabbing me by the horn. Oh no. "Who are you?" "Pvt. Contorta. Sir!" I tried, saluting. "Imposter!" shouted Thorax. "Reveal your true self!" "I… but… Ah, what's the point?" I said, snapping my fingers. I burst into green flames and transformed back into myself. "Unicorn! Imposter!" cried Thorax. "Now, hold on, there's something you might want to know." I said. "I'm here to help!" "Help? An Equestrian here to help? Color me a skeptic." "I swear!" I said, holding my hands in surrender. "I want to help you!" "Why?" he asked. "What do you have to gain by helping us?" "I want Chrysalis dead. If she's dead, my mother has less competition for resources." I improvised. "I don't trust you." said Thorax. "I should kill you now!" "Please, don't! Okay, I lied! I don't want her dead because of resources!" "Then what's your gripe with the queen?" "She… She… She killed my sister!" I lied. I was running out of deceptions. "Did she now?" asked Thorax. "Yes. She killed Luna. And I want my revenge." "Why did you lie?" "It's unbecoming of a princess to seek vengeance!" I cried in mock-outrage. Diffusing this rebellion took more acting than I had originally thought. "Besides, my mom would never have let me go if she knew what I was actually here for. She thinks I'm here to diffuse the rebellion." "Do you really want to kill the queen?" he asked. "Yes." I said, nodding my head. "Prove it. Help us capture her, and you get to deliver the killing blow." said Thorax. "Yes, sir!" I said saluting. "Well? Amaze me, Equestrian. You had better not disappoint. Your life… I mean, your vengence is on the line." Luna Chrysalis led the Third Company up above the surface. It felt good to breathe in the fresh meadow air, but I couldn't stop to enjoy it. There was work to be done. "Company Three! Fall back! Innovo, with me!" cried Chrysalis. The rest of the group slowed their pace and I ran up to be at her side. "What are we going to do?" I whispered. "I don't know! This is what you're here for! If I knew what to do, I would've done it already!" she whispered back. "This is intelligence division, right?" I asked. "Correct." "Do changelings drink water?" "Yes. Why?" she asked fearfully. "I have an idea. You have to trust me." I whispered. "I don't trust you, but I don't have much of a choice, do I?" "Not if you want your kingdom." "Fine. What are you going to do?" "I'm going to poison all of the troops." I said. "What?!" she exclaimed. "Is something the matter, Colonel?" asked one of the troops. "Erm… nothing. Everythings fine." said Chrysalis. "Relax.. It's not going to be lethal. It's just going to cause temporary dementia. They'll be confused and disoriented, then we can consider this Company defeated, and move on to the next one." "I really, really don't like the sound of this, but my hands are tied, aren't they?" "Pretty much. I need you to send me ahead of the group, so that I may prepare. Is there a river or lake nearby?" "Yeah, there's a lake about a klick forward." she said. "Okay. Send me to scout out the area, and I'll get everything ready." I said. She nodded, turned over her shoulder and shouted. "Pvt. Innovo will scout the area ahead! We are not to proceed until we get the okay from her!" "Yessir!" they cried in unison. "Go ahead. Do not disappoint me." she growled. I ran up ahead until I reached a large body of water, surrounded by reeds and other lake-life. I needed to get to the center of the lake for this to work. I concentrated hard and felt my horn illuminate and a faint tingling in my hooves. I stepped onto the water and stood above the surface. Daddy called this the "Jesus Christ Shoes" spell. I walked to the middle of the lake and sat down. "Okay. Temporary Dementia." I said, closing my eyes. I flipped through my mind, reviewing all of the magical poisons I knew. "Paralysis, no, comatose, no. There you go! Dementia!" I focused on the spell and felt a faint dust fly from my horn. Light blue powder flew from my horn and landed in the water. The water fizzed for a moment, then returned to normal. "Let's hope that worked." I said, going back to meet up with Chrysalis. I ran up to her and told her my status. "It's time to proceed. Don't drink the water." I said quietly. "Alright! Advance!" commanded Chrysalis. We moved forward quietly until we got to the lake. Chrysalis ordered a water break, so the entire group sat down and dipped their hands in the water. One of them raised the water to their faces, then dropped it back into the lake. "Poison!" he cried. "The water is poison! Don't drink it!" "I smell it as well!" said another. "Huh?" I said. Oh no. They were clever. "Colonel Transfus, I recommend we retreat. Chrysalis is on to us." said Mite. "Hm… Fine. Retreat." said Chrysalis, glaring at me angrily. We turned around and headed back to the base. Chrysalis kept looking at me angrily, so I felt I had to explain. "Sorry." I whispered to her. "I don't know what went wrong." "How strong was that poison!" she asked angrily. "I could smell it from half a klick away!" "I didn't know changelings could sniff out my special poison! I invented that spell so that it would be undetectable!" "Maybe by your pony methods, but changelings have a few extra tricks." "Like the swallowing and regurgitation of plastic?" I asked sarcastically. "Shut up! Most of us don't do that. The only reason I did it is because I needed to create the ID without getting caught. I summoned it to my stomach and spat it out. We don't have gag reflexes, so I could just reach in and grab it." "You guys are getting more and more disgusting and interesting at the same time." I said. We walked on in silence until we reached the meadow, where she stomped her hoof, opening the entrance to the cave. "Sir?" asked Mite. "What is it?" said Chrysalis annoyedly. "Is this a mission failure?" "We'd have had to actually start the mission to fail it. We'll begin anew when we have more information from First Company." she said, leading us down the steps. "We'll alert them of this development and get a new plan." "Can I just ask how Innovo didn't notice the poison?" "It wasn't there when I scouted. Sir." I said, as we neared the town hall. "The queen must've poisoned it when I returned to the squad." "I suppose that's fair enough reason." said Chrysalis as we finally made it back to base. We pushed open the doors and were shocked to see my sister, arms and legs bound in chains, sitting at a war table. "Equestrian!" shouted Mite. "Oh no." said Celestia sarcastically. "Put her in cuffs. Lock her up. Throw her in the brig." "Relax, Mite." said a changeling. "She's here to help." "Bullshit! Kill her now!" "Stand down, Thorax." said Chrysalis. "I'm sure she'll be able to help." "Listen, I have to go to the bathroom, and I'm afraid that the restrooms in this place might kill me, so can I please go to the surface?" asked Celestia. "Not without an escort." said Chrysalis. "Innovo! Go with her and make sure she doesn't run off. And don't screw this up, or I will make sure this is your last lunder" "Yessir!" I said, saluting. Celestia and I walked out of the town hall and up the stairs to the surface. I waited until we were completely alone before I began to berate her. "Tia! What are you doing?!" I asked. "I understand that I messed up, but I think it's for the best." said Celestia, struggling in her chains. "These are uncomfortable." "What makes you think this is good?" "Well, I wouldn't have been able to derail the planning process. I hate to say it, but the changelings are pretty clever. Probably as clever as the two of us." "They are pretty smart." I said. "I didn't have much luck either. We need a new plan." "Yes, I think so. And I think I have one." she said, giving me a sly smile. "I'm almost afraid to ask what the plan is." I said. "How much do you trust me?" "More than you'd think, less than you'd hope." I said uneasily.