Damage Inc.

Chapter 1

A/N: Hello everyone, this is my first and hopefully not my last fan fiction. Now the isn't suppose to be taken seriously and no it's in no way referencing the song Damage Inc. by Metallica. I also don't own any characters from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, save for my OCs of course. With that in mind I hope you enjoy my story and if all goes well their will be more.

It was a bright and sunny day in Canterlot. All the ponies were busy about their jobs. Save for the employees of Damage Incorporated. For you see before Equestria's problems were solved with the Elements of Harmony. Damage Inc. solved almost every problem they had. Now a days they're just used for less laboring tasks like filing and well...more filing. Yep, their business has died down a lot, but their current head Fine Print is ever so confident that business would pick up soon. Fine Print is a Unicorn stallion with a dark blue coat, deep green eyes, a silvery mane and tail, and who's cutie mark was a ink well with feather pen and a parchment with indicated that he was good at writing. Today, he was busy figuring the expensive to Discord's latest feat, turning the water in Canterlot squares' fountain into lemonade.

Of course, this was just a harmless prank of his, maybe a way to get under Celestia's skin. Never the less no pony really got hurt, although a lot of colts and fillies did have to be scrubbed after playing in it. Print rubbed the temples of his forehead, no doubt preparing for the long night of expense reports that'll have to be filed. "*sigh* Sometimes I wised the princess didn't let that monster roam free." he said to himself.

Just then another member of Damage Inc. walked through the door. "Here's those files you wanted sir." he said pulling a stack of files out of his saddle bag. "Ah, thank you Cotton." Print said moving a few of them around. "Anything else I can do for you?" the other stallion asked. "I need these files brought to the archives." he said levitating a few files into his saddle bag. "Alright, how's that expense report to Princess Celestia coming along?" he asked. "To be honest I not sure it will get done." he said going through the new files. "Chin up sir, I know you won't let her down." Cotton said. "Well thank you, Cotton. Your confidences gives me new vigor." he said chuckling a little.

Cotton then walked out of Print's office and to archives. Cotton Candy was and Earth stallion with a cotton candy blue mane and tail, dark blue eyes, pink coat, and a cutie mark of well...cotton candy. He came from Baltimare and worked at his parent's stand at Baltimare Pier, though those skills pertain to making cotton candy. But he still wanted to help, not just his home city, but all of Equestria. It wasn't until he was walking outside towards the other half of Canterlot Palace, that he was broadsided by something white. "Why hello there snookems'." The white blur said. He rubbed his eyes only to meet a pair of darker green ones. "Oh, hey there Windy." he said still shaken a little. "Do you know how long it's been?" she asked pouting her lower lip. "Um...3 hours?" he asked confusingly. "I know, just love messin' with you." she said.

She then got off him, and found his files scattered everywhere. "For Celestia's sake Windy. Do you know how long it's going to take to clean these up?!" he shouted. " I sorry, I've been a bad filly. And deserves a spanking later." she said with a smirk. Cotton just rolled his eyes. "You mind helping me pick these up?" he asked. "Oh sorry, can't. Storm brewing not far from here and have to take care of it." She said taking flight. "Oh, so you're not busy to smack into me, but you're too busy enough not to help?" he pointed out. "Yep, until next time." she said blowing him a kiss. Cotton shook his head and went back to gathering his files.

Windy Rain was a Pegasus mare from Fillydelphia. She had a yellow mane and tail with green streaks in them, green eyes, a white coat, and her cutie mark was that of a rain cloud with three lightning bolts. Her talent was well stopping bad weather from happening, and of course she was Cotton's filly friend. Although he wasn't open to the idea at first, but he came around eventually. Anyway, Cotton was busy gathering up his scattered files. "Whoa, what happen here?" someone asked. Cotton turn around to find another member of Damage Inc. Ash. Ash Fall was another Earth stallion much like Cotton only...buffer. He had a grey coat, black mane and tail, orange eyes, and had a cutie mark of a safe. Although no one really knew what it meant. "Oh, hey Ash." he said. "Let me guess, Windy?" he asked. "Yup, who else?" he replied. "See, this is why I don't have a filly friend. I'm young and to many oats to sow." Ash said. "Careful, I hear that kind of life style leads to unwanted pregnancy." Cotton joked. "Oh haha, I didn't know you were such a comedian." Ash said with hit of sarcasm in his voice. "You mind helping me with this?" Cotton asked. "No can do, I'm going to find me a hot little number." he answered. "Haven't you dated just about every mare in Canterlot?" Cotton asked. "That's the beauty of a female dominant society, lack of competition." He said. "Besides, I've only dated the legal ones and the ones who're cheating on their husbands." "Isn't that a little wrong?" Cotton asked. "Buck if I know. Buck if I care." Ash said walking away. Cotton finally got all his documents and proceeded to the archives.

Upon entering there, their was a heated argument going. "Working with you is a living nightmare for me!" an English accented voice shouted. "Yeah well, working with you is no picnic for me either!" another voice shouted back. Cotton entered the main archive room to find two Unicorns glaring at each other. "Your filing system is flawed!" the black one shouted. "Really, if it's flawed how come it works? If we used your filing system this place would be a bigger sty hole then it is now!" the white one shouted from his ladder. The two Unicorns in question were Penmanship and Dewey Decimal. Pen was the black Unicorn with the English accent. He also had a white mane and tail, blue eyes, wore a red bow tie and glasses, and had cutie mark of a finely written document. Dewey was the opposite being that he was white with a black mane and tail, purple eyes, wore a blue bow tie, and had a cutie mark that was a letter A a dash then the letter Z. Now they weren't just two random Unicorns forced together by chance, no they're brothers, twin brothers in fact. "Excuse me." Cotton said interrupting them. "Sorry Cotton, what can we do for you?" Pen asked. "Master Print wanted these files put away, sorry they're a little disorganized. Don't ask." he said getting the files out. "I'll see that it gets done. Dewey!" Pen shouted. "Yeah, yeah, I heard him." he said climbing down from his ladder and reorganizing them at his desk. "You look tired Pen." Cotton commented. "Egh, Mint had me out all yesterday finding dresses for her. I love her, but Celestia help me, she can run me ragged." he said. "Hah, Pen was out with his filly friend." Dewey mocked. "For the hundredth time, she not my filly friend. She's my wife!" Pen shouted. "Yeah, I don't believe you." Dewey said. "You were at are wedding!" Pen shouted again. "Not ringing any bells." Dewey said. "We have a daughter, who we've had you watch on more then one occasion." Pen said. "Pen, I'd think I'd remember doing something like that." Dewey said. Almost like clockwork, a Unicorn mare walked. "Darling, you were a zuch a hurry you forgot your lunch." she said levitating a brown paper bag on the desk. "Ah, Mint. Please explain to my half-wit brother that we're married." Pen said. "Of course we're married zilly." the mint green mare giggled. "Yeah Pen, have a little more faith in your wife." Dewey said. "But you...and I..." Pen stammered.

"I'm going to leave, you two deal with...whatever this is." Cotton said as he was leaving. The last thing he heard was Pen screaming and shouting death threats at his brother while Mint was trying to calm him down. Cotton continued back to Print's office, when heard more shouting and not the angry kind. "Brothers and sisters, repent for all you're wrong doing. Our fair and just lady Celestia, is a forgiving soul and would gladly do so if you ask for it!" the voice said. This voice belong the last member of Damage Inc. Black Sabbath. He was a Pegasus, black coat, teal eyes, brown mane and tail, and a cutie mark of a winged cross. Since he was young Sabbath and ever other member of his family a long with a few others, worship the princesses like gods. In same cases they were, but since the first Alicorn Equestria has had a long going religion. "Good day to you Cotton, and how fairs your day?" Sabbath asked. "Okay I guess." Cotton said. "That's fantastic, if only my day was going smoothly." he said frowning a bit. "How come?" Cotton asked. "Not many ponies these day want to worship the divine word of our holy light." he explain. "Well chin up, you get new followers soon." Cotton said. Sabbath nodded and went back to his gospel. Cotton got back to Print's office, when Print rushed out. "Oh, sir I'm done with the delivery." he said. "Ah good, good, one less thing to worry about." he said. "Are you okay sir?" Cotton asked. "Cotton, we must get to others. I got an important letter." Print said. "From who?" Cotton asked. "The Princess." Print replied.

Well, there's my first chapter. Let me know what you think. I'll have the next chapter up soon.