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"Whurgh…" Gabriel groaned. "Never again." He slowly pushed himself up on his forearms and clutched his head in agony.

"Second worst. Hangover. Eve-" Gabriel stopped, eyes wide. He carefully waved a hand in front of his own face, staring at it. "… Whoa. Weird. I got drunk to make Fluffy: Animated. Now I get drunk, and I am Fluffy: Animated!" He sat up gingerly, discovering the splintered remains of a table beneath him. It was then that he heard the voice.

"Ohmigoshareyouokaydidyoufallthroughtheroofohwellw aitofcourseyoudid'causeotherwisethatwouldn'thaveha ppenedyouprobablywouldhavejustusedthefrontdoorbuta nywaydon'tworryaboutthathimyname'sPinkiePie-" the tiny pink prancing pony gasped for oxygen, and Gabriel cut her off.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" he said, pushing her away. "I said drunk, not tripping. How hard did that homeless dude hit me?" he asked, tenderly rubbing the back of his head.

"Furfpf ffmph frrmple fmph."

"What?"

Pinkie deadpanned, pointing to the tuft of violet mane beneath him, the only proof that Twilight Sparkle still lived.

"OH, CRAP, I KILLED IT!" Gabriel shrieked in a high pitched voice, leaping up from the ground with much more dexterity than a man of his particular girth would be expected to possess. "Are you okay, little pony? Little pony?" he peered around quizzically, finding nopony beneath him. "Where'd you go, amigo?"

Pinkie Pie stuffed her hoof in her mouth, desperately trying not to giggle at her friend, who had become quite stuck to the underside of the oversized fluffy comedian. She moaned, dropping off of him with a small pop! and rolled over.

"… Well, on the bright side, I think I can safely say that I have never had anything hairy and purple fly out of my rear before." Gabriel said, helping the nearly crushed unbalanced unicorn to her feet. "Name's Gabriel Iglesias! Most people call me 'Fluffy'," he said, shaking her hoof warmly.

"… You seem to be in an awfully good mood, for having very nearly killed somepony." Twilight stated flatly.

"Oh, I'm gonna wake up any second now," he waved her off reassuringly. "I'm probably high as balls right now. That, or hallucinating."

"Ah, I see," Twilight said, trying to straighten her now-very-flat mane. "denial is generally the first stage of-"

"Cake?"

"-cake, and th- no, that's not what I was talking ab-"

"No, cake!" Gabriel shouted, pointing in shock. Normally, Gabriel was much more overjoyed to see cake. However, he was particularly stunned to see Pinkie Pie juggling seventeen of them. And, somehow, still managed to find time to rub her stomach a couple times and say "Chocolate cake!"

"…What? How - But that's... Where did you even…?" Twilight began, ogling her friend. "… Actually, you know what? I don't want to know." She began ripping up her notes telekinetically, throwing them in a waste bin. "Any time I ever try to figure out how you work, the universe breaks a little."

"Forget the universe, she's juggling cake!"

"I know, want one?" Pinkie yelled happily to him, punching one out of the air with surprising grace without dropping the other sixteen.

The cake hit the wall with a loud (and very messy) splat, leaving both Twilight and Gabriel lightly coated in chocolate frosting.

"… Hmm. Not bad." Gabriel said, running a finger through the frosting atop Twilight Sparkle's head and tasting it. "Needs a little more sugar."

Twilight sighed heavily, and her horn glowed brightly for a moment. The cakes promptly stopped flying around in a potentially mess-inducing loop, and gently began lowering themselves to the floor.

"Ooh, ooh! I know this one!" Pinkie bounced excitedly, whipping a pair of sunglasses from somewhere behind her and slapping them onto her face. "Bullet-Time! Who-tcha!" and with that, the pink pony promptly pummeled every single cake out of the air, punching haphazardly in every direction.

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"Look, all I'm sayin' is that if Twi's gonna do somethin' dangerous, like tryin' ter figure out how Pinkie Pie works, then y'all shoulda warned the poor girl, or somethin'." Applejack said conversationally to Rainbow Dash as they approached the library.

"Oh, 'cmon, AJ. You know what she's like when she has her sights set on something. You think I didn't try? Besides, you remember 'The Deadpool Incident'-"

"Ah don't even wanna talk about it," Applejack cut her off, eyes narrowing to pinpricks.

"Yeah, me neither." Rainbow Dash agreed, ruffling her wings uncomfortably. "Oh, sweet Celestia, the pudding…!"

Applejack's face flushed at the remark. Rarity's parents still refused to look her in the eye. She did her best to brush off the unpleasant memory as she opened the library door for her Pegasus companion.

"Darlin', ah think the bes-"

Applejack never got the chance to finish her sentence, as around fourteen or fifteen large, decorated chocolate cakes flew at high speeds through the doorway, each of them leaving slightly shimmering waves behind them before they vanished.

And Applejack was battered with every single one of them.

"The horror – the horror!" a male's voice cried out from inside, and a large, hairless and slightly tanned ape in a bright flowery shirt came bounding out the door. "Pinkie, how could you? Wasting perfectly good cake for… for slapstick?!"

"Yeah, but it was slapstick with a cheesy reference!" Pinkie exclaimed, bouncing out the door behind him. "That makes it better."

"No, it does not make – well, maybe a little." Gabriel agreed nonchalantly. "Oh, hey. More hallucinations. Hi, talking ponies!" he waved, giving Rainbow Dash and the quite unconscious Applejack a hearty grin.

"BUCK ME WITH A SHOVEL, YOU'RE GINORMOUS!"

"No, I'm Fluffy." He said jovially, extending a hand.

Rainbow Dash shortly joined her blonde friend in sweet unconsciousness.

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"Whee! Go faster!" Pinkie Pie squealed in glee, clamped tightly to Gabriel's shoulder as he walked sullenly through Ponyville.

"I have been going faster," he grumbled. "plus, you're heavy."

"You don't find that slightly ironic?"

"I find it ironic that a horse is riding me."

"I'm a pony!"

"Fine, then; you do the carrying!"

Pinkie Pie gasped, as if offended. "And use up all that energy I've been saving for making cupcakes? Never!"

Gabriel had grown slightly grumpy over the last hour or so – it was hard enough discovering that he still wasn't waking up, not to mention the fact that Pinkie insisted on sitting atop his shoulder as she directed him around Ponyville, talking to absolutely every single inhabitant they passed.

Besides, he still hadn't had breakfast yet.

"You said we were going to have cupcakes an hour ago!"

"Well, we have to make them first; silly filly." She pointed it out as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. The pair passed a couple of salesponies making their wages at carts, selling vegetables and delectables. One very run down building in between a couple of bland looking shops had a broken wooden sign out front, labeled The 8-Bits. They passed it and rounded a corner, and Pinkie jammed her hoof as far as she could out in front of her.

"There it is – Sugarcube Corner!"

"And that's where we're making the cakes?" Gabriel asked quizzically.

"No, dumpy-frumpy! That's where we're making the cupcakes; the cakes are already done. We can eat those as soon as we get th- whoa!" Pinkie Pie had no idea the human could move that fast, as he certainly didn't look like he could. They closed the distance between themselves and the brightly colored shop so quickly one could have sworn the earth was scorched in the places they passed.

And were Rainbow Dash conscious, she probably would have objected that anything could move faster than she could.

Then again, Pinkie Pie was involved.

"Best. Friend. Ever!" Gabriel shrieked, squeezing Pinkie in his arms happily as he burst through the door to Sugarcube Corner.

"I. Can't. Breath!" Pinkie gasped, freeing herself from the man's grasp. "Ooh, maybe vanilla and pineapple first? Or, or maybe gumdrop pumpernickel and - … what are you doing?"

"What's it look like I'm doing?" he replied as he hefted up a rather delicious looking chocolate cake from behind the glass display.

"Did you pay for that?" Pinkie Pie asked, narrowing her eyes dangerously.

"Oh, uh… Lemme get my wallet." Gabriel said sheepishly as he sat the cake on the counter and reached into his back pocket. After a couple of moments of mild confusion, he came to an unsettling conclusion.

"… That homeless bastard stole my wallet!"

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"Yar! And I'll swab the deck with me mateys! Tain't no pirate meaner'n Fluffybeard!" Gabriel growled, standing atop the counter and threatening the pink pony with an inflated balloon.

"Yar! Nopony mocks Sugarpatch, the fiercest pink pirate to ever plunder ponykind!" Pinkie responded menacingly, clapping one hoof over her eye as she giggled, flinging another blue frosting coated cupcake at the human.

Mr. Cake chose the worst possible time to step in through the door, dropping a tray of freshly baked goods to the floor with a clatter. "What in the wo-?" he froze when he saw the... er-hem... excessively abundant comedian perched atop his counter. He merely gaped at Gabriel in surprise, who had strapped a loaf of bread to one leg in order to better imitate a pirate's peg.

"... Yar?"

For the third time that day, Gabriel watched a pony lose consciousness.

"... Well, buck me with a shovel."

"I think you mean, 'Shiver me timbers!" Pinkie corrected him.

"That, too."

Author's Note:

I originally hadn't planned to write more than a single chapter.

Then again, after the ENORMOUS response it received, it seemed a little unfair not to.

Also, I would just like to state that Gabriel Iglesias is one of the best comedians I have ever had the pleasure of seeing. An all around cool guy with a big heart (pun not intended).

Finally, I sincerely doubt any of my stories would get even HALF the number of views they normally would, were Fluffy's face not the story cover. Seriously; now that you're finished with this chapter, go find something Fluffy related. I'm almost POSITIVE some wonderful fan of both Iglesias and ponies will have it posted in the comments section below.

I'm also working on a much larger project, the first in a trilogy if you have the time to read it. You can find it at 'I Hate You All - Part One In The Dawnbreaker Trilogy'!