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It's All Hooey

by DisneyFanatic2364

Chapter 1: A Trip to the Farm

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I said I wouldn't start any more of these fics until I finished the others, but ugh, the MLP fandom has officially pulled me in. This is my first MLP fic and I know this concept has been used so many times, but I wanted to give it a shot.

Disclaimer: I do not own My Little Pony.


Tammy glanced out the window of the car, her arms folded across her chest. The city had disappeared and the hills of the countryside came into view. She didn't mind visiting her aunts on the farm. In fact, she loved the farm. It was a nice break from all the city noise and smoke. It was the fact that her father was going on a business trip again and dumping her off.

"Are we there yet?" she groaned.

Her father sighed from the driver's seat. "What does it look like?"

"No."

"Exactly, but we'll be there in a few minutes."

"Do you really have to go?"

"Yes, this is a very important client and this account could mean a raise, possibly a promotion. We could get you that electric guitar you've always wanted."

Tammy sighed.

"What's wrong now?"

"Are you gonna be back in time for my birthday?"

"Of course I will, hon."

"You can't blow it off again. It's my Sweet Sixteen, Dad."

"I promise, I'll be back in time to celebrate your birthday."

"That's what you said last year," she muttered under her breath.

"Okay, we're here."

The car pulled up in front of a large red barn and corral. Riding on a horse was a tall blonde woman in green overalls. When she saw the visitors come out of the vehicle, she jumped off and raced towards them.

"Tammy, Danny!"

She attacked her niece with a hug, which Tammy happily returned.

"It's great to see you again, Aunt Megan!"

The woman pulled away to get a good look at her. "My, my, my. Have you gotten taller? I hear someone's turning sixteen next week! That means you'll be getting your driver's license!"

"Yep! I can't wait!"

"You'll need a car then. Danny, tell me you're getting this girl a car."

"Of course I am," he replied, holding his arms out for a hug. "How are you, sis?"

"Oh, excellent! Moonbeam just gave birth to a new foal last week."

"Really?" Tammy asked excitedly.

"Yes, she's in the barn right now."

Tammy didn't waste a moment to rush inside.

"Where's Molly?" Danny inquired as he got his daughter's luggage out of the car.

"She's out in the orchard."

"Thanks for taking care of Tammy while I'm in Tokyo."

"It's our pleasure. She's always such a big help." Megan's face then turned serious. "Danny, you are going to be home in time for her birthday, right?"

Danny was taking out Tammy's guitar when he paused. "I'll try to make it."

"Danny…"

"I'll try, alright?"

"She's your daughter, Danny. Don't stand her up again."

He slammed the trunk closed. "I won't. Listen, I can't stay. My flight's in two hours. Tell Molly I said hi."

He got into the car, but before he drove off, he rolled down the window and looked at his older sister.

"And Megan," he started, "don't talk to Tammy about…that place."

Megan rolled her eyes. "What's the harm in it, Danny?"

"She's too old for that stuff."

"You were there too."

"But that was a long time ago. You can't be telling her things that aren't supposed to exist."

She knelt down to her brother's eye level. "You used to be different, Danny, before Irene passed away."

Danny sighed and sat up straight. "Yes…before then."

Then he rolled up the window and drove away. At that moment, Tammy ran out of the barn.

"Dad, you gotta see it! It's so…"

Then she saw the car disappearing down the road. Tammy's arms drooped.

"Well, goodbye to you too!" she shouted angrily.

Her aunt laid a hand on her shoulder. "He has a flight to catch, hon, but he told me to say he loves you." That was a fib, but she figured Danny would want her to say that. "Hey, Aunt Molly's in the orchard. Why don't you go help her out while I take your bags to your room?"

That lifted Tammy's spirits. "Count me in!"

She bolted towards the field of apple trees and searched excitedly for her younger aunt. Then she spotted her, a woman resembling her Aunt Megan, but a few inches shorter with her hair tied back in a ponytail and wearing pink overalls. She was picking apples from one of the trees.

"Aunt Molly!" Tammy called.

The woman turned and smiled when she saw her niece. "Tammy!" She started climbing down the ladder. "When did you get here?"

"Just now!"

She gave her aunt a hug.

"Oh my," Molly said in awe. "You're getting prettier every day. Why, you look just like your mom." Tammy's smile wavered. "Sorry. Hey, how would you like to help me make some apple pie?"

The teenager started jumping up and down like a schoolgirl. "Yay, my favorite!"


Later that afternoon, the three ladies were sitting in the kitchen eating the freshly baked apple pie.

"So is your dad going to be here for your birthday?" Molly inquired.

Tammy hung her head. "He says so, but I doubt it."

"I'm sure he'll come home in time," Megan assured her.

"He hardly comes home at all! Not for parties, not for concerts, not even for dinner! If I wasn't old enough to take care of myself, I would have called social services!"

"He's a busy man, honey. He's only working so hard so he can take care of you."

"But he never wants to do anything."

"He wasn't always this way," Molly interjected. "Why, back when we were kids, he was always pulling pranks and such. Remember when he made it rain on us?"

"Huh?" Tammy uttered.

"Molly," Megan warned. "You know how Danny hates it when we talk about…"

"Oh, hogwash!" the younger sister exclaimed. "What he doesn't know won't hurt him! You see, Danny convinced one of our pegasus friends to make a cloud rain on us…"

Tammy giggled. "Guys, you know I'm too old for those stories. I know you didn't really go to a land filled with magical talking horses."

"They were ponies, and we really did go there."

She laughed some more and started gathering their empty plates. "Come on. You think I was born yesterday? They were fun when I was little, but now it's just kind of silly."

"They are not silly! They really…"

"Just let it go, Molly," her older sister interrupted. "She's never going to believe us."

"I'm going to take Vanilla out for a ride. Is that okay?"

"After eating?"

"You know I never get nauseated, especially when riding on a horse! See ya!"

Megan rolled her eyes. "At least we know she can find some happiness."

"I'm just disappointed that she doesn't believe us," Molly grunted.

Meanwhile, Tammy walked into the barn and found her favorite cream-colored horse. She held out her fist and let the animal sniff it. Then it lowered its muzzle and allowed her to pet it.

"Nice to see you, old girl," she muttered.

The horse whinnied in agreement, which made Tammy smile. Since she was little, her aunts kept telling her stories about a land of ponies who could talk, fly and even do magic. They also had jobs, real jobs like baking, teaching and selling things. She used to love those stories, and she still did, in a way. She just didn't want to appear childish. She sighed and stared at her horse friend.

"If only you could talk, girl," she said. "That way I wouldn't feel crazy for talking to a horse. But we both know horses can't talk. And they certainly can't fly or do magic. It would be cool, but horses like that don't exist."


In the far off land of Equestria, a purple alicorn was in her library, reading a book on myths and legends. She was asked by her mentor, the ruler of all Equestria, Princess Celestia to read this book, because it was possible that some of these legends could be true. The young alicorn read all of them and thought them a bunch of hooey, but one chapter sparked her interest. It was short and vague, which made it all the more intriguing.

A voice interrupted her reading. "Twilight!"

The alicorn turned to face a small purple and green dragon. "What is it, Spike?"

"Have you forgotten?"

He waved a woven basket in front of her face. Twilight gasped.

"The picnic! Oh gosh, I was so wrapped up in this book…"

"So what else is new?"

"Ooh, I'm late! They're gonna be so mad!"

The horn on her head glowed purple and that same purple light enveloped the dragon and he was instantly lifted onto her back. As soon as the door was opened, Twilight spread her large wings and bolted into the sky.

The ponies in the town of Ponyville down below looked up and bowed their heads. Twilight rolled her eyes. Since she had become a princess, many of the ponies were treating her like royalty, even though they had all known her for three years now. At least best her friends still treated her like they always had.

Speaking of which, there they were, two earth ponies, two pegasi and a unicorn sitting on a picnic blanket on a hill. Twilight landed gracefully, panting. She was still getting used to the wings.

"Hi, every pony," she said, lifting Spike off her back with her magic. "Sorry I'm late."

"It's cool, Twilight," the blue pegasus with the multi-colored mane named Rainbow Dash said. "We haven't started eating yet anyway."

"I'm really sorry, though. I was so caught up in reading this book for Princess Celestia that I nearly forgot about the picnic!"

"What book were you reading?" asked the white unicorn, Rarity.

"It's called: Myths and Legends from Beyond Equestria."

"Ooh," the earth pony named Pinkie Pie marveled. "What kind of myths and legends? Ghosts? Vampires? Zombies?"

"Those were in there, but they're all nonsense. However, there was one chapter that was particularly interesting."

"Really? Really? What was it about?"

"It was about a creature called a human."

Every pony gasped.

"What's a human?" asked the yellow pegasus, Fluttershy, who knew about nearly every creature in Equestria.

"It's a creature from somewhere beyond Equestria," Twilight explained. "Not much is known about them, except that they walk on two legs and hate it when their other two hooves touch the ground. Also, they seem to come from a land where ponies don't talk."

Every pony gasped again.

"Ponies don't talk?!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed. "That must be horrible! I know what it's like not to be able to talk, and there are so many things you can talk about that I can't imagine not being able to talk all your life, oh it would just be terrible and…"

"We get it, Pinkie!" Rainbow Dash interrupted.

The orange earth pony, who had been lying against a tree chewing on a piece of grass, lifted her cowgirl hat and said in a southern accent, "I've heard about these critters. My Granny Smith mentioned them once. She said some humans came to Ponyville several years ago, before Big Macintosh and I were even born. Not a lot of ponies knew about them, though."

"No offense, Applejack," the blue pegasus said, "but your granny isn't all there. I mean, come on! What kind of animal walks on only two legs?"

Fluttershy started listing them: "Chickens, birds, sometimes bears and bunnies…"

"And me!" shouted a voice behind her.

The yellow pegasus squealed and hid behind Twilight. She then peered around and saw that the creature that had frightened her had a pony head, a deer antler, a bat wing, a snake tail and various other animal parts. She sighed in relief.

"Oh, Discord. You startled me."

"You invited him?" Rarity gasped.

The draconequus rolled his eyes. "What? Still can't get used to the fact that I'm reformed?"

Rainbow Dash narrowed his eyes. "Let's just say we're still having trouble trusting you."

"You did turn my apple orchard into an ice rink, after all," Applejack pointed out.

The Lord of Chaos shrugged. "Fair enough. Now, I heard you were talking about humans?"

"Yeah," Twilight replied. "I read about them in a book. I'm not really sure they exist though."

"What are you talking about? Of course they exist!"

Every pony's eyes widened.

"They do?" Fluttershy asked.

He nodded. "Yes, my dear. In fact, I visited their world in the Dark Ages. It was really quite chaotic back then. They kept calling me…what was that name? It began with an 'S'…"

Rainbow Dash huffed. "Yeah, right. As if there actually is a land where ponies can't talk."

"Nor fly."

The pegasus sat up. "What?! Now I know you're lying!"

"You don't believe me? I'll prove it to you!"

With a snap of his fingers, he vanished, leaving every pony baffled as to where he had gone.


After her ride on Vanilla, Tammy retrieved her acoustic guitar and notebook from her room and found a place on a grassy hill. Once her instrument was tuned, she started strumming the strings.

"Here I am," she sang. "Sitting by myself…no, no. How about…? I'm all alone here, with no friends. Ugh!"

She hung her head back. Her dream was to be a singer. She had already written a few songs, but lately, she'd been getting writer's block. She figured coming to her favorite place in the world would change that, but the atmosphere didn't seem to make a difference.

She looked out at horizon, not like the sun was setting or rising. She just stared into space and thought about everything: her dad, her lack of friends, her loneliness. She did not mention that little detail to her aunts, for she didn't want them to worry.

For some reason, she had trouble connecting with others. They thought she was weird, because she spent so much time alone. Being alone helped her to think, but it was also…well, lonely.

She sighed, thinking about the stories her aunts would tell her. They said the ponies there were always eager in making friends with everyone, no matter what their differences. Sometimes, she wished that such a land could exist. Not the part about talking ponies, but the idea that there could be a land where 'anything was possible,' as her aunts would say, just excited her.

Then she had an idea and scribbled in her notebook. She sang the words she had written.

"Somewhere
There's a land of magic
There's a land of wishes
A land where sunshine
Always reigns

Sometimes
I wish I could be there
I wish I could see there
That land where nothing
Is ever the same."

Not bad, she thought to herself. It won't win a Grammy, but not bad.

Tammy sighed. "I wish I could go there, if such a place exists."

"Wish granted!"

"What the…?"

She turned around but was blinded by a flash of light.

At the bottom of the hill, Molly was calling her niece down to dinner. When she received no reply, she climbed up angrily to see what was keeping her. The blond woman let out a shriek. All that sat on the hill was an acoustic guitar, a notebook and pencil. Molly knew how important the guitar was to Tammy and that she would never leave it behind!

"Megan!"


Excuse my cheesy lyrics. Fun fact: Megan, Molly and Danny were the human characters in the first-generation MLP. Know what you're thinking, but that was the MLP I knew as a kid, though I just love Lauren Faust's version of it! Oh yeah, and Tammy is named after the voice actress for Megan. Also thought it suited.

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