Fluttershy carressed her newborn child in her forelegs and cradled her with all the love she could possibly give him. It had been three days since she was brought home from the place of her birth, and the momma couldn't be any happier with her little bundle of joy. Unlike most mares, she didn't go into a postpartum depression because she was just too danged happy to have her baby in this world, snuggling up to her.

She was just about to fall asleep right there with her, when a knock on the door jostled her and frightened the still timid Pegasus. She gently set her down on the chair, then went to answer the door. Whoever was at it was getting impatient, as they were knocking more rapidly.

"Oh, hey, Rainbow Dash."

"Hey, Fluttershy. Just wanted to see how little Medusa is doing."

"Um...it's Hestia."

"Oh, right, right."

The baby slowly opened her eyes to see Rainbow Dash's grinning face.

"Hey, there. I'm your aunt Rainbow Dash. I just wanna say, uh, no hard feelings about when you kicked me in the face while you were in your mama's belly. So...truce?"

The baby stifled a bit, then cried her eyes out.

"Sheesh, talk about sensitive."

Fluttershy the protective mother came over and embraced her child.

"Um, I should have warned you, she doesn't like being woken up from her nap."

"Hmm...neither do I..."

"Shh, it's okay. It's okay. Momma's right here."

As soon as she heard her mother's soothing voice, she calmed down and looked up at her. She gently rocked her back and forth while humming 'Hush Now, Quiet Now' before she fell asleep within the span of a few minutes.

She looked back over at her friend, who was twitching on the ground and had foam coming out of her mouth.

"Rainbow? Are you alright?"

"Yeah...just a bit of...cuteness diabetes."

She took out an insulin shot and injected it into her pancreas. She gasped for breath a little before coming to and standing beside her friend.

"Seriously, that baby you had is adorable. Even though I can only see her with one eye."

"Your eye looks much better to me."

"No, this is a glass eye. They had to remove the one that Pinkie whipped."

"Oh, I'm so sorry."

"Tell that to Pinkie. I have gotten not just a hundred apology letters, but an Apology Telegram."

Flashback to Rainbow Dash opened the door of her cloud house when a stream of confetti hit her face. In its place stood Pinkie, looking not as bubbly as usual, but her mane going a little flat while singing her a telegram.

This is your apology telegram

I hope that you get well

I'm sorry that I whipped you

And then made your eye swell

Your injury's because of me

And that's not really great

I've made you this so you will not

Get me back because I -

"Pinkie! I already said I forgive you!"

"But Rainbow Dash, you only have partial vison because of me! I'm so, so sorry!"

"Yeah, you're sorry. I get it. And I forgive you, okay?! Now, leave me alone!"

"Well...okay..."

Rainbow looked at the sad pink Earth pony curiously for a moment.

"Pinkie, how are you standing on clouds?"

"I am?"

She began to fall through the cloud bank, but Rainbow Dash caught her by her forelegs.

"Oh, just let me drop to the ground. Then, at least we'll be even."

"Pinkie! Don't talk like that! You're seriously bumming me out! Look, let's just say that we're even and that we're cool alright?"

"But we're not cool, Dashie! I have to get hurt in order for us to be even!"

"Well, in that case..."

She lifts one of her forelegs from supporting Pinkie.

"NO NO NO DON'T DON'T STOP STOP!...Why did you stop? I said drop me."

"You said stop."

"Of course I said stop. You were gonna drop me."

"Well, make up your mind. What do you want me to do?"

"Drop me."

She prepares to drop her to the ground below.

"NO NO NO NO DON'T DON'T!"

Rainbow Dash lets out a groan of impatience.

"Sorry. Look, I know I'm being a little hard to read-""

Both forelegs slip from under the pink pony, and she screams as gravity does its job of pulling her down to the Earth. Rainbow Dash wants desperately to save her, but she know that Pinkie won't leave her alone if she does, so she lets her fall to the ground with an audible thud. Rainbow cringes at the sound, then goes to check out the scene.

Pinkie has thankfully landed in a pile of manure, but she is still out cold from the impact. Not wanting to get caught for this act, Rainbow looks both ways while backing up slowly, then floors it back to her house.

"I hope she's alright," Fluttershy said, concerned.

"She's fine. But that's not really the reason I came over."

"Yes, you said it was to see how Hestia was doing."

"Well, I changed my mind. I'm actually here because we need to work off that baby fat of yours."

She pointed to her friend's swollen stomach.

"Rainbow Dash, that won't really be necessary-"

"Yes, it will. Swimsuit season's coming up, Fluttershy! You've gotta stay in shape!"

She grabbed Fluttershy's hoof and started to lead her out the door.

"WAIT! Who will look after..."

"I've got you covered."

Fluttershy looked on in terror as a pink Earth pony took her baby and held her close. She still smelled of the foul manure of the fields, and it soon filled her house.

"I'll take good care of her, Fluttershy. If she starts to cry, I'll just give her some sugar. Sugar helps everything!"

"Pinkie, that's not-"

"Let's go, I haven't got all day!" yelled Rainbow as she dragged her friend along.

"But...but..."

A very high-pitched squeak was the last thing that escaped her lips before Rainbow Dash closed the door.

Outside, she forces Fluttershy to do push-ups in the blistering heat. Helping the situation somewhat, she sprays cold water on the grass, but that only makes it a dirty mix of dirt and water.

"Eat mud! I said, eat it!"

"Rainbow Dash...I think I swallowed too much mud."

"Take a salt tablet."

Next, she tries to lift up a barbell, but can't even nudge it a centimeter off the ground.

"Come on, Fluttershy! You've gotta do this! Come on! Up, up, up, up!"

The frail Pegasus collapses to the ground, not even being able to lift a barbell with stuffed animals on either side.

A while later, Fluttershy is continuing her muddy push-ups, but with Rainbow Dash lying on her back and reading the newspaper. Of course, being the athlete that she is, she chooses the sports section.

"Yankees are looking good."

The Sun is setting by now, and Rainbow Dash is on her friend's back as she runs through the forest.

"Strong with The Force, young Fluttershy is."

Soon after her Star Wars reference, her hoof trips a root, and she goes crashing to the ground, slipping in the dirt and crashing into a nearby tree.

"So...tired..."

"That is why you fail."

"Rainbow Dash...please...can we take a five minute..."

"You don't deserve a five minute nothing, Fatty! That's right, pig! Get up and swallow some more mud! That's your slop, you big, fat..."

Tears stream from her eyes because of Rainbow Dash's violent barrage of insults.

"Oh...I'm sorry, Fluttershy. I just thought that humiliating you would make you more determined to get this baby fat off. But hey, that's just my logic."

Rainbow's ears drooped at the sight of her friend crying like this because of her.

"Uh, let's call it a day. Uh...good job."

She dusted herself off, then half-limped back to the comfort of her cottage. Her legs felt as if they were about to fall off, but she trudged on, hoping to get back to Hestia in one piece.

"So, Fluttershy," said Rainbow Dash, following her. "What do you say, for tomorrow's workout, we just do some nice, relaxing sky clearing? That always calms my nerves."

Fluttershy got back to the doorstep and shot Rainbow an angry look.

"You're not gonna show up, are you?"

She slowly shook her head no.

"Well, uh...Friends?"

Still wearing the half-furious expression, she shook Rainbow's hoof in an act of friendship, then slammed the door on her.

"I'm just gonna slip this workout regimen under your door."

She quickly scribbled a schedule, then carefully slipped it under her door.

"And, uh, here's a salt tablet."

A tiny pill rolled under the door and settled next to the slip of paper.

"These things help anything...Fluttershy?"

Fluttershy, with her mane still disheveled and dirty from Rainbow's workout, followed the sounds of Hestia wailing to the kitchen.

Inside was pure and utter chaos, things were levitating and spinning around in the air, the curtains were on fire with some kind of green flame, and Hestia was in the middle, crying through it all.

"Now, where have I seen this before?"

"FLUTTERSHY!"

Her direction was focused on Pinkie, who was being cornered by a gang of evil gingerbread man-shaped cookie cutters.

"Pinkie?! What's going on?!"

"I don't know! She's been crying for hours! I tried the flour trick; Nothing! Then, I tried making silly faces; Still nothing! Either your baby needs to get a sense of humor, or she's CRAZY!"

The cookie cutters, holding butcher knives, slowly inched closer to the pink pony.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"Don't worry, Pinkie!"

She avoided a flying toaster, then sweeped all the gingerbread men into her saddlebag. She put the bag into a cabinet and ducked for cover when a sonic wail from Hestia imploded the entire cabinet with a loud boom. The two ponies were forced to hide under a table as shards of metal from the cookie cutters rained down on them.

"Wasn't your wallet in your saddlebag?"

Her eyes widened, and Fluttershy realized her mistake as broken coins mixed in with the metal pieces.

"Fluttershy, I'm home. I hope you made dinner, because I am-WHOA!"

A burst of yellow-green flame erupted from the foal's mouth and right towards her father in the doorway.

"Since when could she do that?!" he asked, shocked.

"Yeah, you might wanna check your bedroom."

The married couple Pinkie's advice and ran down the hall. Heat from the flames radiated over them, and they saw the full capacity of the situation: The whole room burned with a yellow-green fire inseveral places along the walls and on the bed.

"Oh, my goodness. I'll get the fire in the kitchen! You get up here!"

Fluttershy quickly went outside and gathered the watering hose that Rainbow Dash used to turn the lawn into mud. Then, she flew inside as fast as her wings could carry her aloft and doused the flames in the house. Spraying water at the base of the flames, she was able to ruin the curtains, but put the fire out.

Discord, meanwhile, filled a large bucket with water and carried it to the bedroom. Unfortunately, on the way there, he spilled the heavy load and slipped in the water until he came to the bedroom and was set alight by the flames.

"AAAAAAAH! I'M ON FIRE!"

Hestia wailed louder than before as the house burned around her.

"What are we gonna do, Fluttershy?!"

With her motherly instinct, Fluttershy moved closer to her baby and sniffed the air suspiciously. Her nose wrinkled at the smell, and she turned her gaze over to Hestia, still crying on the ground.

"Uh-oh," she said in a calm tone. "Somepony's got a stinky."

She toned down somewhat and looked over to her mother, who picked her up off the ground and smiled up at her.

"Well, we'd better do something about that."

She nuzzled the pony-draconequs mix affectionately, and a tiny giggle was heard round about the cottage, causing the kitchen appliances to be set down gently and all chaos to stop.

"Um...Pinkie, you wouldn't happen to have any-"

"Right here!"

She tossed a diaper over to Fluttershy, who took advantage of the calm atmosphere. From a mix of natural instinct and parenting classes, she methodically removed Hestia's dirty diaper, sprinkled what she hoped was talcum powder on her cute little baby bottom, then put a fresh diaper on.

Hestia's dirty diaper landed right next to Pinkie, who gagged at the smell.

"Oh, dear Luna and Celestia! It's like a mix of old cheese and garbage!"

"No, Pinkie, it's just poop. Now, could you please throw that away for me?"

"Uh, sure, Fluttershy."

She found a bag of partially-burned chips on the counter and used the clamp that held the bag shut to pinch her nose and carry the radioactive material to the trash. Unfortunately for her, due to her hooves, she had to pick it up with her mouth.

Hestia, currently in a good mood, laughed as Fluttershy played a game of peek-a-boo with her, using her wings to cover her eyes.

"AAAAAAH! HELP! I NEED MEDICAL HELP!"

Discord and his daughter's screams filled the air, one of them being in physical pain until Fluttershy filled a small bowl with water and dumped it on his head, dousing the flames, but also making him all wet.

The laughing began with Hestia, then spread to Fluttershy, and finally to Pinkie, as they gathered around the wet and grumpy Discord.

"You know, there's still a fire upstairs."

The realization hit them like a bullet, and they all rushed upstairs to deprive the flames of oxygen.