Chapter Twenty-Four—Back to Egypt.

Two months after my birthday, I was again summoned to Celestia. This time I made sure I was standing up.

When I teleported in, I made a quick survey of my surroundings. I saw two random ponies and Celestia standing nearby. I nodded to them.

"I see you haven't trained this… creature… very well, Princess," said one of the visitors rather haughtily.

I pulled out my dagger. "You wouldn't believe what she had me trained to do to people I don't like. And if you keep talking like that you're going to find out firsthand."

The stallion that made the remark visibly blanched, while his mare companion smiled at my response.

Celestia just said, "Remember what happened the last time blood was spilled in front of me, Navarone. And remember whose it was."

"Bah. You're the one who summoned me, but I'll be damned if I'll be talked down to by a bloody pony, I don't care what kind of influence he holds.

"That's no way to talk about somepony that will soon be in your protection, if you'd have him," she answered. "Both of them, actually."

I put the dagger away. "And what makes you think I'd want to do any more of your bloody jobs? The last one ended up with me at the forefront of a bloody revolution. I came closer to dying there than I did fighting with the naga, which is the job that brought me there in the first place." She already knew this, of course, but if I was going to end up guarding these two bloody ponies for whatever reason, I wanted to make sure they knew I wasn't someone to fuck with.

"Standard fare, of course, Navarone." Meaning it was this or bust, for me.

"You always have such a way with words, Celestia. What's the job, and why are these two worth my time?"

"The job is pretty simple. These two ponies need to go from here to Egypt. Since you've been there in the past," I snorted at that, "I figured you'd be the best for the job. And knowing how some of the natives there feel about ponies, I figured they could use the extra protection."

"Bloody ambassadors. Why not give them royal guards?"

"Because royal guards weren't at the final confrontation with the leader now in power in Egypt. You are a reminder of my power, and the forces I can bring into play if either of these two end up hurt."

I took a second to study the guests better. The mare was a green unicorn with a cutie mark of an open book and a mane of light blue. The male was a brown earth pony with a cutie mark of a chalice and a mane of a darker brown. He didn't look quite as abashed as before, though he still didn't look quite like he wanted me as a protector.

"How long will this bloody thing take? I may not belong here, but I've made a life here now, and I'm not exactly overly pleased to be having to keep leaving it like this."

"Like it or not, Navarone, you're useful to me and to the realm. However, your part in this shouldn't take that long. You're supposed to be there just long enough to be seen by enough people in power. Unless their lives are actually threatened, you should be back within a month of being in Egypt. All around, it should take three months for you. They'll be there a lot longer."

I sighed. "I'm starting to think you hate me. You always want to send me away whenever we talk. Fine. I'll do your bloody mission. But I want a neat hat."

"Sorry, but I actually have something else in mind for you to wear."

"Is it too late to request the death penalty for that treason charge you pushed on me?"

"You haven't even seen it yet! I even had one of your friends help make it!"

"…" You could actually hear the ellipsis in what I didn't say.

Remember that 'outfit made for the Liberator of Egypt' Rarity promised me? Yeah, she made it. Out of complete boredom, as far as I could tell, because I would never willingly put that on my body, and she had to know I would never willingly put that on my body.

The two ponies I was set to escort—named Calix and Emerald Script, if anyone cares—seemed to love it. If I had my fire starter on me, I would have lit it on fire and hoped it burned, and then did my best to exorcise the ashes.

Since this is supposed to be a true account, of sorts, I suppose I should describe the damn thing. It was purple, blue, and white. Purple, to show my… royalty, or the fact that I act on a royal leash. Blue, to show that I am still a public servant. And white to show my… mercy, I suppose. Not exactly the colors I would choose to depict myself. And not the prettiest of things to look at. In the deserts I would stand out.

It was interlaced with iron studs, ostensibly for protection but more likely to make me look more like a warrior. They weren't placed anywhere useful. At least it was iron instead of gold; on the off chance something did hit them, they would actually block some force. Gold is pretty much worthless.

The entire thing was gaudy as all fuck. It's like it was made to show off my wings, for one, and there were frills all over it. I don't think I could even draw a damn knife in that thing, let alone find a place to store it.

I took one look at it, turned to Celestia, and said, "Hell no. I would rather light myself on fire and greet the Egyptians that way."

"That would rather go against the idea of peace we're trying to push, here."

"That's a risk I'm willing to take. I ain't wearing that shit."

Emerald looked at me and said, "I think you'd look good in it."

Calix added his opinion to the matter as well, in his annoying, greater-than-thou nobleman accent: "Yes, it would certainly be an improvement to what you're wearing now."

"Are you sure I can't kill them? I've heard horse meat is pretty good, and I could share with Spike!" They both looked a bit frightened at that, not knowing who or what Spike was.

Celestia shook her head, saying, "No, they're too useful right now. Maybe when they get back, if they manage to mess up in Africa." When I got a thoughtful look on my face, "No, you can't sabotage them." I sighed.

She continued, "In all seriousness, though, you need to wear something regal. This is what we have. If you have something better in mind that you can get within a day, by all means. Otherwise, this is it."

"How often do I need to wear it?"

"As far as I'm concerned, you'd only need to wear it when you first arrive at the palace and at some important state functions. When you arrive there, though, Emerald Script will be in charge. Given the sensitive nature of this mission, I may revoke one of our past agreements, relating to the last time you were here." Meaning the promise not to eavesdrop on me, I assumed.

"So all this job entails is going to Africa, guarding these two kids for a month, and then running home?"

"I wouldn't quite say that," Emerald said, with a disturbing smile.

"Just so we're clear. I'll do jobs for you. I might even be willing to kill someone for you, if I think there's a good enough reason. But I draw the line at things of questionable moral standings.

Calix turned to Celestia. "Where do you find these servants?"

She just shrugged and said, "Blame my students."

I had one more demand, since it was going so well anyway. "Oh, and while we're there, I want to see the Sphinx. I'm sure I'll find some time to do it, but I'm not coming back until I see it."

"So you will do it?"

"What other choice do I have, dammit?"

"Good. Emerald Script, Calix, see to your preparations. You all leave tomorrow." They bowed and left. When they were out of earshot, Celestia turned to me. "You really need to learn what to say and when to say it. I think you might have made them both rather mad."

"They'll get over it. They both need to learn to treat others better anyway. Calix is a dick, and Emerald Script is rather creepy."

"I think there's something you're not telling me."

"There is. But you don't need to know about it."

"We've been over this before."

"Yes, and we won't get anywhere new by doing it again."

"You're always such a pleasure to talk to, Nav."

"And you always know just the right things to say, Celestia."

She turned serious. "Honestly now, you don't have to do this one if you don't want to. I would really, really like you there, but I know you're getting close to your friends. And I know there are a lot of painful memories for you in Egypt."

"You don't even know, lass… But this needs to be done, sadly, and I'm one of the few that can do it correctly. I doubt they'll be attacked, but Egypt… is not like Equestria. Someone well versed in pony ways and that knows about Egyptian ways will be needed as guides for your ambassadors, if nothing else. Though I don't know why you had to choose those two."

"I picked them to get them away from here, for the reasons you described."

"Are you sure those are the kind of people you want representing Equestria?"

"No, but I also don't have anypony else to send over there. And when I said Emerald Script will be in charge, I didn't actually mean that. For their benefit, she will be. As far as I'm concerned, you're still a foreign entity. You can do whatever you need to do to keep them safe, and as long as you don't go crazy with that privilege I will back you up. You are there to show the natives of Egypt the power of Equestria."

"That means no getting raped by another crazy cat woman."

"I still don't know why you let them twist the wording in my letter like that."

"I don't know why you let it happen when you knew it was happening. Besides, Africa was a dangerous place. I couldn't risk letting an 'accident' happen to me."

"And that is precisely why you are going with them, and why you are basically in charge of their safety for the first month or so. They will be getting royal guards, but you're the real muscle there."

"I'm really starting to dislike that ability you have."

"And which ability is that?"

"That one that basically forces everyone to do what you want."

"Oh yes, that. I know. I've been a princess getting unruly subjects to do what I need them for longer than you've been alive, though. If it makes you feel any better, you're one of the few that have actually noticed I'm doing it."

"Stop it!"

"Just proves my point. Do you need anything else while you're here, or should I send you back to Twilight now?"

"Send me back. If we're leaving tomorrow I'll need to say a lot of goodbyes in a very short time, and grab a lot of stuff."

And just like that, I was back on the way to fucking Africa.

The goodbyes were depressing, even though I knew I should soon be back. I'd miss most of summer there, if nothing else. Which means I'd pick up the brunt of winter in Egypt, something I was not looking forward to.

And I made sure to hate on Rarity for the costume she gave me, though after the whole fashion thing we were a little closer than before, even though she doesn't remember the time we spent in the jail cell and when she was forced to use me to keep warm.

Rainbow Dash was distraught at my leaving for what I thought was probably the coolest reason ever. "How am I supposed to use you as a wing man if you're leaving?" she practically wailed at me.

I paused. "Do you mean me helping you pick up chicks, or me helping you practice for the Wonderbolts?"

"Yes!"

"I'll be back soon enough, lass. And honestly, depending on the chick you're trying to pick up, you might be better off without me helping you do it. Also honestly, I'm really not the fastest flier, despite having huge wings. There is little magic in me; I'm mostly good for gliding."

"Well, yeah, but if we turned you back into a pegasus you'd be better at both!"

"Depends on what you're looking for, in terms of relationships. And who you're looking to bag." She opened her mouth, but I forestalled her, saying, "Don't tell me now, lass. Give me something to look forward to when I get back."

She smiled at that.

Spike really wanted to join me on my trip, but I told him there was no room, and that Twilight wouldn't let him anyway. He tried to get me to promise to bring him some jerky, but I managed not to. Hell, if I was bringing any jerky back I'd have to bring pounds and pounds of it, or it would all be gone by the time I got home. I love me some jerky.

Twilight was also pretty easy to say bye too. "I will definitely miss our conversations, but when the Princess calls, she calls. I understand royal duty well enough," she told me.

"True enough, lass, but that doesn't mean I have to like it. At least this time I probably won't be fighting for my life." I stressed that probably.

"You were hardly fighting for your life last time. Hearing you describe it, you were doing very little in the way of actual fighting."

"I consider slitting throats some manner of fighting. I just managed to stay out of the way of any blades, which is a good enough achievement, as far as I'm concerned."

"Maybe you'll even run into some of your old friends while you're there!"

"I hope not. I wouldn't call any of those cat people friends. Jocasta was only on speaking terms with me when she needed me. Rock scared the hell out of me. Kat was… no. Miguel was probably arrested for being a murderous, scary little man. The rest, I didn't know that well."

"You always meet such colorful characters."

"Yeah, just look at you! You're bloody purple!"

She stuck her tongue out at me.

Applejack was also decently easy to say bye to, especially since she knew I was coming back. She was very practical, honestly. And it also meant that, if she decided to go back to any dancing lessons, she would probably end up dancing with Rainbow Dash. I teased her about that.

"Maybe it wouldn't be so bad, though…" she mused. Catching herself, she blushed, and corrected, "To have a partner that might actually be attracted to me, I mean! You're alright, but I know you don't feel anything towards ponies!"

I smiled at her. She blushed deeper, muttered something about having farm work to do, then ran off. Kids these days.

Pinkie Pie was sad to see me go as well, though for different reasons. "No time to throw a going away party again? Princess Celestia simply must stop giving us such short notice! How am I ever going to throw you a good party if you're always leaving too soon?"

"Relax, lass. I'll be back before you know it, and then you won't have had to worry about throwing me a party anyway."

"Are you saying that you'll leave and be back so quickly that when you get back the light particles from your presence immediately before you left will not have even departed yet?"

Pinkie Pie is fucking crazy, man. "Not exactly what I meant, no. More like I should be back within three months or so, and that the time will pass fast enough."

"Oh. That makes much more sense!"

Fluttershy was… difficult. "Why are you leaving again, so soon?"

"Celestia needs me. She presented me with two choices. One was going to Africa. The other was… less pleasant."

"You and Twilight make her out to be such a villain! Whenever I talk to her, she seems so nice."

"Be happy she doesn't need anything from you, then."

"Couldn't you ask her if you could stay? Why does it have to be you?"

"Because I was the one that helped the slaves. I am the living representation of Celestia's power. And I have spent time in Egypt before; I have experience her ambassadors will need."

"Wouldn't you much rather stay here, with m—I mean, us?"

I was somewhat surprised, but didn't comment. "Yes, I would. But would you deny someone your talents if they needed them? I could not refuse to help someone in something like this, myself, not when I know I could be useful. And especially not when my aid is requested. There is nothing more I'd rather do than stay here, but I don't have that option. Maybe after this, things will die down. Maybe the spring is coming for me, finally. And when I get back, we will… talk."

She smiled at that, at least. Hers was one of the last friendly faces I saw in a while.

The next day I was given a ride from Ponyville to Canterlot. It was easier doing that than it was teleporting me, with all the stuff I was bringing. To be honest, it wasn't that much: My desert suit, which I was hoping I wouldn't need all that much, my weapons, another honing stone, another new fucking cloak, some more sensible clothes, and what I was hoping was enough paper to keep me writing for a good spell. And, of course, that bloody outfit Rarity made for me. I was on this trip for royal reasons, and I was hoping the Crown would be paying for more clothing when I got there. And whatever else I needed.

And all I had to do to earn it was keep two idiots alive. How hard could it be?

On the train ride to Manehattan, I found out how hard it might be. Not to keep them safe from external threats, but to keep me from killing them both myself.

I ran to their cart when I heard a yell. I ripped the door open to find… nothing.

Before either one could open their mouth, I said, very calmly and coldly, "If you complain about this cart being too small or not comfortable enough, I will hurt you."

I waited for a few seconds. They said nothing. I closed the door. I heard Emerald say through it, "I told you that would happen!" I walked away.

It was going to be a long, long trip.

I wish I could say that when we got to Manehattan we wasted little time in getting to the boat, but these bastards had a metric fuckton of shit they brought with them. Like, boxes and boxes of just crap.

Fucking nobles, man. I was starting to wish this was Dwarf Fortress, so I could just get them to kill themselves.

When they asked me to help them with their crap, I told them up front, "I'm not a servant. I'm not technically even a body guard. I am an agent of the crown. I get my orders from Celestia or Luna, no one else."

Emerald tried to take me off that high horse: "My orders said that I'm in charge! You can't say no to me!"

"Your orders were wrong. You can ask Celestia if you want."

She tried to get the other guards that were accompanying her to arrest me or something. I looked at them.

They didn't even try.

In the end, Emerald and Calix had to carry some of their stuff themselves, while they hired some day laborers to carry the rest. The guards and I just watched impassively, though I, at least, was struggling not to laugh.

I didn't mention this earlier, but there were six guards here, from the palace, to watch over the two. There were two of Luna's night guards and four of Celestia's day guards. And yes, each of the day guards and each of the night guards looked the same. Don't ask me how, though my guess was that Celestia had a gene lab hidden somewhere and was cloning them all. Anyway, they got the same orders I did, apparently, or they might well have tried to arrest me when Emerald told them to. They probably would have succeeded—they're trained fighters, while I'm a burgeoning assassin and ranged fighter. Up close and personal, it would be hard to take down even one of them. That would have been pretty embarrassing.

Oh, and when the nobles saw the boat we were going on, I thought they would throw a hissyfit that would make Rarity proud. We were not going on a royal military fleet. No, we nine were going on a merchant ship. The two nobles had to share a room. The guards and I didn't even get a damn room. We were given the option of bunking in the mess hall or outside. I chose outside; it was stifling inside. Most of the guards did the same.

And to make my cliché about the seasick people semi-true, both the nobles did end up getting seasick. It was their first time at sea. I didn't make any kind hearted jokes about it, though. They were all mean, and all shared between the guards and I. I managed to get the guards laughing, which wasn't supposed to happen. Just showed how they all felt about the two nobles.

Since it was a merchant ship, they were in a hurry to get where they were going and they didn't have to actually slow down to maintain any formation. It didn't take us as long to get there this time. I wasn't looking forward to getting to Africa, but I was looking forward to being able to get away from the two ambassadors for a bit.

The merchants were able to drop us off in Alexandria, but they couldn't stay; formal relations between the two nations had not developed enough to allow easy trade. Besides, not many people here would give good deals to ponies.

Before we hit the city, I warned the guards: "Do not expect a warm welcome. When I was here last, ponies were not treated well. I don't personally expect open hostility, but nor will I be surprised if you receive it. Guard the two nobles, and watch out for thieves. If you have to, abandon their shit and rush them to a tavern called The Salted Mare. Ask any pony for directions. If you're posed a riddle, the answer when I was here last was 'Celestia and Luna.' If the shit absolutely hits the fan and you cannot stay in the city any longer, use your wings, pick them both up, and fly off. I'll be out and about, and if you have to flee I'll meet you south of town. There are plenty of oases between here and Catro, so don't worry too much about supplies if you have to abandon everything."

One of the day guards spoke up, "Do you really expect it will be that bad?"

"The first thing you'll learn here, kid: Expect the worst. Sometimes you'll be surprised. Wait a day for me at The Salted Mare. If I don't show up, go on without me. I'll either catch up or I'll be dead."

With that warning, I put on the rest of my desert clothes and jumped off the boat. I was able to sail in from a little ways off the city, so I could walk in again, as I had the first time. I had on me my pack full of everything I brought and my weapons. I also had enough bits to hire a room for the night if I needed it. The goal was to join a caravan going south if possible, and if not we were to just walk the whole way ourselves.

I wasn't going to stay away from the main group that long, just long enough to visit a few places. Mainly, to see if Amir was still alive and well, and to pick up more clothes if possible. I had some words for Amir, if I could find him again. And I had a knife for Anton, if I found him.

Thankfully, there weren't any bodies on the city wall this time. The guards also made me peace-bind my weapons as I walked into the city. My knives, at least; they didn't know about the crossbow.

When they made me do it, though, I commented, "How is this fair? The ponies still have their sharp hooves. Why remove my main defenses if there are still those about that can hurt me?"

"Almost none of the ponies will attack unless attacked. You must have been away from cities for a while. To be fair, most of the guards agree with you. We follow our orders, though, and since we're told to peace bind weapons we will do so. Just use your claws if you must. They can't deprive us of those!"

I laughed along with him; no reason to let anyone know I wasn't a cat. Yet. Thankfully they didn't inspect my bolts. That would have raised a few questions.

When I got into the city proper, I saw that little had changed, aside from there being fewer ponies out and about. The place was still a bustling port city on the side of a desert, and despite there not being any trade going on with Equestria proper, there was still trading going on with other parts of Africa and with pony smugglers that operated out of the Middle East.

Hell, everyone has a price. Even ponies.

Finding Amir's tavern wasn't that hard; the city may be large, but I'm pretty good with remembering directions. Not much about the tavern had really changed, other than a hulking guard sitting near the back, with paws that looked like they had been broken over faces more times than their owner could count.

I sat at a table and waited for a serving woman to approach me. She was one of the same cat women that had been working here the last time, I thought, though it was a bit hard to tell; I wasn't paying much attention at the time. I asked for water and meat, as before, and I asked about Amir.

"He doesn't come out as much as he used to, now that his position as a slave helper has been revealed. Why should I fetch him now?"

I took off a glove and told her, "A friend from the past is here to see him."

Her eyes widened a bit. She slowly nodded and went off to do as I asked. I put the glove back on before too many people could see my hand and comment. I didn't know the kind of reaction I'd get for my actions in the revolution, which was one of the reasons I came to Amir's inn. He would be able and willing to tell me what to expect, especially when I threatened to gut him for selling me out, though I was hoping it wouldn't have to come to that.

I didn't have to wait long before the serving lady came back and told me where to go to find Amir. I followed her directions and found myself in a back room.

I pulled one of the bolts out of my quiver and idly twirled it around, waiting for someone to arrive. I was expecting either the guard, to knock me out or worse, or Amir.

Thankfully, Amir showed up, though I figured he had his guard standing outside the door, listening for a shout. I put the bolt up.

"Human, why are you back here? I never expected to see you again!"

"I could say the same. I'm here in your inn for information. I'm back in Egypt because I go where the Crown wills. I'm pretty sure you were told what a haul you had in me, when you sold me out to the slaves."

"I did what I had to do! They had my daughter…"

"I don't care about motives or your life story. What is done is done. What I need is information, and perhaps a bed for the night, depending on what you tell me."

"Tell me your questions, then, O Great Liberator."

"What kind of reception will agents from Equestria receive here? Actual pony agents, not more like me."

"Ambivalence. Most cats won't care, though a few might look at them negatively. The dog people never cared for ponies, any of them, and will give the usual negative responses. But as far as I know, they won't be openly attacked, unless they do something to rile the natives."

"What kind of reception will I get here, and in the capital, if I go around unmasked?"

"Differing reactions. Some hate you for what you did, some don't know much about you, and some love you for it. Not many were privy to what your actual actions were, other than that you were pivotal in the revolution effort."

"And as far as I'm concerned that's how it will stay. In your opinion, would I be better served by staying hidden for as long as possible, or should I make who I am known?"

"That depends on why you're here. I presume you're part of a diplomatic team, if you're here with ponies. In the streets, you might as well go masked. You will probably be safer, if nothing else. But among the leaders and politicians in Catro, you should go unmasked. You will gain no ground by being a faceless voice, no matter what policies you hold."

"The same way it is everywhere. Good. What else has been happening here, in the time since I left?"

"Massive upheavals. We have learned the hard way that you can't remove a head of state in a military coup without some problems. For the most part things have been safe, but some of the slave groups in the desert still haven't gotten the message that the war is over. Banditry is still a bit of a problem. The main roads are patrolled, though if you're going to Catro you better make sure you have some manner of identification showing yourself as an ambassadorial party."

"Do you know what happened to the cats I left behind in the slave group I helped lead out of Egypt?"

"Some of the leaders accepted positions within the new government. Some continued fleeing from Egypt into pony held lands. Some stayed behind here, to try their luck as free people."

So I might run into Kat again. And this time I won't be forced to do as she asks. Interesting.

"How secure is the new leader?"

"He has the entire army behind him. The only people protesting are a few richer slave owners, and slavers with their own private armies. Most know how to ride the winds of change, however, so I don't expect they'll hold out too long."

"I don't suppose you know where Anton is, do you?"

"No. He's the one that kidnapped my daughter. If you find him, hurt him for me. Thankfully, she was returned unharmed after the slaves were released, but that doesn't change the fact that she was taken from me."

"I was planning on hurting him plenty enough for myself, but I'm sure I can find it in my heart to share the hate."

I turned to go, but Amir stopped me. "For what it's worth, Navarone, what you did was good for this country, even if you didn't want to do it."

"I know. But just because something is good doesn't mean someone else should be forced into doing it. You were forced to help the slaves because your daughter was kidnapped."

There was nothing he could say to that. I left.

I took a few hours to wander the marketplace, making sure to keep a tight hold on all my belongings. There was nothing here I actually wanted, and it would be a bad idea to buy anything now that I'd have to carry with me on the trip to Catro, but it gave me something to do while waiting for the ambassadors to get to the inn. I did get some more clothes, at least; those I had on were getting rattier than they were when I got them, and none of the cuts they got when I was fighting helped them any. I tried to avoid blades, but it's hard to keep baggy clothes out of the way of cuts. I had tricked more than one enemy into leaving me for dead that way, too, so I guess it wasn't such a bad thing.

The sun was starting to set when I decided to make my way to the tavern I told them to meet me at. Thankfully, when I got there I found it hadn't changed at all in the time since I had been to it. However, I was asked two riddles this time, instead of one. The first was the same, with the same answer. The second was about what I was expecting, at that point: "Which creature in the morning goes on four legs, at mid-day on two, and in the evening upon three, and the more legs it has, the weaker it be?"

"A cat person. Or a dog person. Or a man." Yeah, they didn't know what a man was, but they gave it to me anyway, since they were told to expect someone fitting my description.

When the doorkeeper let me in, I asked him, "Why the extra question?"

"We have important guests from the homeland. We can't risk allowing them to be hurt. You are likely the one they told us to expect, though. And if you aren't, don't expect to be here long."

I took off my cape and my head mask. "Those royal guards wouldn't lay a hoof on me."

The doorkeeper smiled at me. "It's good to see you again, Liberator."

"Name's Navarone. Where are the ambassadors? And the guards?"

He blinked at my pause between guards and ambassadors, and the fact that I mentioned the guards at all, but he answered nonetheless: "The ambassadors are in their room. The guards are dotted about the building, with one watching the ambassador's door."

I nodded. "Thanks." I went to look for the guards first, because I really didn't feel like dealing with the ambassadors.

I found two of them in the common room. They nodded a greeting to me, and then went back to somehow playing dice with their hooves. I don't know how the hell ponies do stuff like that.

"You're lucky I'm not in charge of discipline," I told them. They just shrugged. "Anyway, how was the trip into town?"

"Nothing to report. We got a few odd looks, but no open hostility. No one was expecting us. Are you certain Princess Celestia sent warning ahead that we would be here?"

"No, I'm not, and that worries me. As far as I know we're flying blind, here. I don't know what she told the ambassadors, and since I did nothing to ingratiate myself with them they wouldn't tell me if I asked." A thought struck me. "I don't suppose we're carrying any manner of Equestrian flags? Or anything to show that we're a foreign entity?"

"I think the nobles might have a flag. We usually just follow orders, and we weren't told to bring anything like that."

"Damn. Okay. When we get on the move to Catro, take off your armor, by the way. You'll die of heat stroke by the time we reach the first oasis if you're wearing that metal stuff."

"Yes sir."

"I'm not an officer, son, I work for a living. That's just advice, not an order." That definitely got them smiling. "And spread that advice around to the rest of the guards. I don't want to have to carry a bloody pony because he was stupid enough to wear metal armor in the Egyptian sun."

"Will do. And by the way, the ambassadors are mad at you. So be careful when you visit them."

"They can't do anything to me, but thanks for the warning, at least." Probably pissed I left them on the boat.

I went to the rest of the guards first, repeating my questions and advice. Most of them told me the ambassadors were pissed.

I was tempted to prove a point and not even bother with the ambassadors, but since I was stuck with them for at least another month I decided to do the good thing and at least see what they were mad about this time. I may be a bad person, but I really didn't feel like having to work closely with people I didn't like and couldn't stand being around for a bloody month.

With that in mind, I knocked on the door to their shared room. "Who is it?" Emerald sang out.

I sighed internally, and said, "Navarone."

The door ripped open and magic pulled me inside. Oh fuck, not again…

I heard the door slam shut behind me and the lock get pulled. So much for getting the guards to help me… Still, I have yet to find a truly dangerous situation I couldn't talk my way out of.

Before either Calix or Emerald could say anything to me, I asked, "I don't suppose either of you brought a flag from home?" There's a chance I can make it out of here easily…

Neither of them were expecting that question. Calix answered, before he could be stopped, "Yes, we have one. Why—" He was cut off by Emerald.

"That's not how this is going to work, human. You have a lot to answer for."

"I don't see how. The guards got the same orders I did. You have nothing on me, other than the ability to use magic. And the way in which you're using that makes you little more than a bully." I was doing my best to shame her. I figured, if push came to shove, there was a very small chance she was actually a powerful magic user, and I could escape her. I didn't want to risk tipping my hand at that point, though.

"We're ponies, and we're nobles. You're just a mongrel pulled out of nowhere to serve us. How dare you try to shame us, or lord anything over us?" Calix accosted me.

Oh, you're on my shit list now, boy. "The lot of the sapient life form is based on their ability to reason. You obviously scored low on the reasoning level, so I was placed above you in terms of natural rank. Celestia saw this, and put me outside of any of your social structures, and given that, you have nothing on me. You may be a noble, but as far as I'm concerned you're a bloody mite. My job is to do what's best for Equestria. If you keep thinking that, as a pony, you're part of a master race, what I think is best for Equestria will be your permanent removal from any capacity as an ambassador."

"Are you threatening us?" Calix asked.

"No. I'm threatening you. All Emerald Script is doing right now is holding me. You're the one insulting everything not a pony, while at the same time going to serve as an ambassador to an extra-pony race. That is a dangerous mix, especially when the people you seem to think are beneath you have a habit of eating just about any meat they can find."

I felt the magic bonds around me fall away. "He's right, Calix. We can't keep doing this. We got exiled here from Equestria because of this. This is the end of the line for us!"

I don't think Calix knew I wasn't being held up anymore. He turned on Emerald and said, "If you weren't holding him in place right now, I would do to you what I did to that serving filly! Do not try to stop me from teaching this beast a lesson!"

Emerald visibly blanched at that. I decided then and there that he would not be surviving the trip to Catro. I couldn't kill him here, because that would technically be murder. But anything can happen on a dangerous road, and by the time a body spends a day in the Egyptian sun, it's impossible to tell what killed it.

I flexed, to make sure he knew I was free. When he rounded on me in horror, I just gave him the coldest look I could manage. "You two will not be sharing a room. And Calix, you're to be watched by a guard until we leave tomorrow. Emerald Script, come with me."

We left him there. I told the guard at the door to keep an eye on him, and to keep shifts on him for the rest of the night to make sure he stayed there. Emerald was practically quivering in either fear or rage when we got to what I was told was to be my room for the night.

"What did he do to this serving girl?"

"He… he beat her. Badly. That is why he's here… He has always had a bit of a temper, but he's never used it against me before!"

"Do not worry about him, lass. He will be taken care of. The road to Catro is a long and dangerous one."

"Surely you don't mean… You wouldn't kill him!"

"I meant what I said in there. He is a danger to everyone around him, and to Equestria. We can't send him back, we can't leave him here, and we can't afford to keep him with us in Catro. And anyone that admits to beating someone will have done it more than once, likely. It is not a kind fate that I will give to him, but it is what must be done."

"How can you be so… callous about this? He's a living being!"

"I am a servant of the crown, right now. I have been told to do what is for the best for Equestria. If that means killing one of the ambassadors that is supposed to represent Celestia, then so be it."

"How am I supposed to explain that in my reports to Princess Celestia?"

"He was attacked by bandits in the dangerous roads. That gives us the excuse of the dead ambassador and leverage to use over the king."

"You're cold, Navarone."

"Yes, I am. Feel free to bed here for the night, if you want. I can sleep with the guards."

"This room is big enough for two. I don't care how cold you are, there's no reason we can't share a room."

"If you're really afraid of Calix, I can stay here if you wish. I see no reason for it, but whatever."

"That would be… nice," said with a little smile. Thankfully, she didn't try to push anything. Might have had something to do with the fact that I just told her I'd kill her partner soon.

I didn't even bother trying to find a caravan going the same way we were. We needed to get out of the city as fast as possible, and traveling with a caravan of obvious merchants would mean danger when there were bandits about. A group of six obvious soldiers, a mysterious creature with wings, and what appeared to be a scholar wouldn't be attacked, I was hoping.

Besides, it would be hard to explain why I killed Calix to any caravaners, and they might well kick everyone in my group out of theirs when I did so.

So it was a fairly small group that left the city. Knowing we had to travel light, and that we also had to carry food and water, Emerald was smart enough to let me leave most of their crap behind. With the funds selling that stuff to a merchant gave me, I was able to buy food and water for all eight of us, using native money that wouldn't raise too many questions.

I also skimmed a bit off the top to get a falchion and a few more daggers, so I would hopefully look more threatening when we got where we were going. I had no idea how to use the falchion, but the daggers were pretty simple: Throw and hope you don't miss. I also had a few darker reasons for getting them: If Calix's body was found, we could claim that he went missing and we couldn't stop to wait or look for him. His death would be blamed on bandits.

I also got a holster for the flag, so one of the guards could carry it on a pole on his back. I was hoping that someone would, if not recognize the Equestrian image on it, recognize that it was at least a foreign power, and that messing with us would be bad.

I killed Calix three days outside of town.

I honestly don't know, even now as I sit writing this, how I feel about that. I do not like killing, but I do recognize that sometimes it is the best thing to do. And he was a bad man. Well, a bad pony. He was also a danger to the mission.

But should I have killed him?

None of the guards judged me, I don't think, and the two that were to be assigned to him when we reached the city almost seemed happy about it. Emerald kept her opinions on the matter secret, though I suspected she would not be lying to Celestia about it.

I had a good excuse, if nothing else.

We made pretty good time, all things considered. I'm not going to lie, though: I definitely slowed the group down. Not just with my sensible safety precautions, but also because I can't run like a horse. Or, in this case, a pony. Give them free reign, and they could have made it in six days or less, if they knew where all the water spots were. And it wouldn't have been fair to ride on any of them, because we all had to carry our share of food, water, and everything else. Still, I was able to fly to speed up the process, when the wind was cooperating.

It was not an easy trip. But we did pretty well at it, anyway.

As a small side note, back at home, I used to read a lot. And I mean, a lot. I always read about adventurers walking places, and taking a week or something to do it.

You want to know why authors mostly skip over that week?

Traveling. Is. Boring. As. Fuck.

Especially in the hot sun, in an empty desert, with possible bandit activity all around you. It's walking and walking and walking, then a bit of flying, then some more walking. You go to bed late, set out quarter watches until morning, with everyone getting a turn each night. Then you wake up exhausted and have to keep walking.

There were two relatively interesting things that happened those nine days, and half of them were me killing Calix. The other thing was running into a small group of about twenty cat people roaming the deserts, looking for any traders. When we saw them in the distance, I almost lost my shit thinking they were bandits.

Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if they actually were bandits, but just didn't see any reason to attack our group. Despite what I told Calix, I honestly don't think any of the cat people would eat a pony.

Anyway, we finally made it to Catro after nine long, boring days of travel.

And God, seeing that city made those nine days worth it. We crested a dune around the time the sun was setting behind us, and saw the city in the red light of the sunset. Minarets cast massive shadows spanning the entire city. Light bouncing off parts of the Nile cast a glow to parts of the lower slums, making even their ramshackle appearance light up before our eyes. We could barely see the tips of the pyramids sticking out to the west. The city's administrative center, the massive palace, was located on our side of the river. It took up several blocks, and was several stories high.

It was a wonderful view.

We made it into the city just as night was falling. I had never been here before, so I had no idea how bad any crime would be. Since I was part of a foreign ambassador team, I didn't have to peace-bind my weapons, which was nice. I was hoping I wouldn't need them, but hell, you never know.

And yes, as it turns out, we were expected. However, they were expecting us to come down the river, not to walk here. Which, as I took a second to think about it, would have made a hell of a lot more sense.

But whatever. We were given very nice accommodations near the palace. After checking the rooms for anything that shouldn't be there—which I admit, I honestly had no real idea how to do—I washed the dust and grime off and went to bloody bed. I was basically just hoping that there were no hidey-holes for eavesdropping or poison in anything.

Oh, and if any readers are wondering why I didn't seem to suffer from much jet lag, well, traveling on a slow moving boat removes much of that. I did have some problems, yes, but they were hardly of note.

The next morning, I laid down the basic rules for the group: "Don't leave this building alone. For any reason. We are not in Equestria anymore, and there are some groups that do not like us being here at all. They might or might not hesitate to use murder to achieve their goals of getting us gone. I do not want to explain to Celestia why any of her guards disappeared, or why our remaining ambassador was kidnapped off the street."

One of the night guards spoke up, "Does that rule apply to you?"

I scoffed, "Hell no."

Emerald interjected, "Perhaps, Navarone, it should apply to you most of all. You are here as a symbol of Equestrian power. If any enemies can take you out of the picture, that would be a crushing blow for our relations in the area. We would appear weak, if nothing else."

"And that's precisely why I shouldn't be guarded. If I'm to appear as a symbol of power, I shouldn't need guards. I should be able to take on anything they throw at me." That wasn't the real reason, mind, but that was good enough. The truth was that I just didn't want to be bothered by guards. Either way, though, she bought it.

"The second thing is to never trust anyone except each other. I know you come from a land of happiness and plenty, but here there are liars. Plenty of them. Some people will tell you the truth and some people will tell you lies. Some will mix it up."

The other night guard spoke up, "What of you, human? I've heard it said that little of what you say is true, and what is true is so full of fluff it's hard to tell what you really mean."

"The difference is that you know I'm a liar. You already know most of what I'm saying isn't true, so you're prepared to counter that. But here, you don't know who is who. Just be prepared. Any other stupid comments?"

There weren't. They even left the obvious thing unsaid: If we know you're a liar, why are we even listening to you?

"My last warning is to beware the food. It's spicy. And it might be poisonous. A good way to get rid of rival diplomats is poison, after all. Enjoy your stay in Egypt."

I think I just convinced a few of them to go on diets.

Emerald did chime in on that, with a contribution I was extremely pleased to hear: "Part of my diplomat training actually included a magic lesson in identifying poison. We shouldn't have to worry about that. The spiciness, though, I can't help with." Thank God for that, at least.

Our palace liaison wasn't due for a few hours, so I had a bit of time to do a more thorough sweep of our building. I was hoping I wouldn't find anything, so I wouldn't have to take time to deal with it, but just because you hope something is true doesn't mean that's what will happen.

Thankfully, I didn't actually find anything. There were a few hidden rooms, yes, but as far as I could tell none of those rooms bordered anywhere important, so we didn't have to worry about anyone eavesdropping. I told the guards about them, and let them deal with it. I was kind of hoping they'd make signs or something that said, 'secret room here,' but all they did was just note their positions.

Despite my killing Calix, Emerald was still rather pushy about me actually wearing the getup Rarity had made for me. I was planning on not putting it on and just sort of not bringing it up at all, but she was having none of it. And perhaps killing Calix had a part in why I caved so easily on the issue of wearing it; I wouldn't be surprised if I was feeling some manner of hidden guilt for the probable trauma I caused Emerald, and was dealing with it by assenting to her demands.

Either way, I put the ridiculous thing on, and felt like a total bloody fruit. I swear, the thing did its best to hold up my wings and make them completely noticeable, which was not at all comforting. I don't know if Rarity actually hated me, or if this was her way of doing me a favor. Heh. She made me a pushup bra for my wings. Now I know how women feel, I guess.

I was looking at myself in the mirror, wondering where I was going to put any weapons, when someone knocked at the door. It was one of the guards, to say, "The liaison is here. She claims she knows you."

Well, there just went any good feeling I had… Jocasta or Kat, one of the two. At least it wasn't Rock. He never was that impressed with my fighting ability. Probably because the fighting ability I used was slitting throats instead of using a massive weapon and swinging it around like I own the place.

I grabbed two of my daggers and put them in my boots. Better than nothing, at least, and it meant I did have some manner of protection if it did turn out to be Kat.

Which, of course, it was.

"Navarone! We have so much to catch up on!" she exclaimed, as soon as she saw me. I froze as soon as I saw her. My mind went blank. Oh God. She ran up to give me a hug that I was too surprised not to return. Her hands behind my back went straight to my wings. I felt my mind caving slightly under the feeling of her touching me like that. Not again… I won't be her pet again. I felt the reassuring weight of the daggers in my boots. I saw the guards—pony guards—around me. I knew I was in control here, not her. I felt sanity slowly returning to me, and I knew I could do this.

When she released me, I responded, "Aye, lass, we might. First, though, we have business to deal with. I don't reckon you've met our ambassador yet. She should be down shortly. Name's Emerald Script."

"I was told to expect two of them."

"He's a bit dead. Killed by bandits on the way in."

I was saved further explanation by the arrival of Emerald. Kat made a half bow to her after a questioning glance my way and a small nod from me. I introduced the two.

Emerald asked me, "Is this one of the freedom fighters that was with you in the liberation movement?"

"Yes, she was one of the leaders," I answered. "You'll have to ask her for anything more about her; I was given as little information as possible during that little episode."

"I'm right here, you know."

"Yes, I know; you're rather noticeable," I responded.

"Now, Navarone, that's no way to treat guests," Emerald said.

"Oh, we're old friends. I understand," Kat said, with a wink at me.

You know, if I could make that whole relationship dynamic equal, I could actually have fun with this chick… I shook that thought from my mind. After what she did to me? It would take a lot of convincing. "So, Kat, what's first on today's bloody agenda?"

"You're to be greeted by Jim Johnson, our leader." His real name, I shit you not. "There's to be a lunch with him and several other leaders. Jocasta and Rock will both be there. I'm glad I don't have to tell you to change, Nav. Those rags you insisted on wearing in the desert would not be suitable here."

"I was… convinced… against wearing them," with a pointed look at Emerald.

Kat smiled at her, and said, "I bet magic is a much easier way to get him to do what you want. We had to use ropes and chains."

Emerald smiled conspiratorially, and responded, "Magic is all well and good, but I think I might have to try rope one day. He just doesn't seem to learn his lesson."

I couldn't tell if the guards were smiling at my discomfort or at her joke.

When we left for the palace, Kat made a point in curling her arm around mine. I honestly don't know if she thought she was trying to compete with Emerald or if she was just trying to be cute. She chatted idly about her time since we had left, intermixed with details of the parts of the city we passed.

The four guards—three day, one night—we brought watched the crowd around us warily, never letting Emerald—or, I noticed with a bit of surprise, me—out of their eyes for long. Emerald was listening to Kat's talk impassively, smiling at some parts of it and seeming to drift in and out of actually paying attention. I figured she was nervous at meeting everyone while relatively alone. Maybe I really shouldn't have killed that fellow… It felt like the right thing to me, honestly. Still, I was probably too quick to kill him. What's done is done, though.

It didn't take us that long to get to the palace, but the leisurely rate we were walking, and the way we were almost constantly surrounded by a shifting crowd of curious cat people, seemed to make the walk take hours. We made it in ten minutes, but I felt like a day had passed on that walk. I was planning to fly in the future, if I had the option.

Something Kat said actually pricked my ears. I tuned in. "Now that we're not trying to hide, you'll have to take my flying one day, Nav. I know for some reason you always took that creepy Miguel with you when you went liberating camps, but I was hoping for more than a short jump. Tell me, is it true that you can sit on clouds?"

"Aye, lass, I can. Not like we'll find many of those here, though."

"I've also heard unicorns can change the weather, though," said with a pointed gaze at Emerald.

"Some can," Emerald said. "However, I do not know the technique."

"Shame. We'll have to find a solution to that, then."

"Why, lass? There are plenty of clouds for me to settle on in Equestria. I don't need any here."

"So you can hold me up on one, of course! Why else?"

"You might be underwhelmed. Clouds feel very different to someone that isn't magically attuned to them. When I first walked upon the clouds, I did so without wings or any manner of pegasus magic. They felt cold and wet, not at all something I would happily walk on."

"It is still something I would like to try…" said with another tweak of my wings.

It was going to be a long month.

At least Rock and Jocasta didn't care about me being there. Kat tried to engage them in conversation about me, but they basically said meh and turned away to greet Emerald instead. I wasn't complaining. I had no idea how much work it took to get Rock to wear a uniform, but he was looking even scarier in it than he had before. And I never really liked Jocasta anyway, after the whole almost causing me to starve while letting me be raped thing.

Though when I realized what their disinterest opened me up to, I started to wish they'd care a bit more. See, we weren't the only ones at the lunch thing. There was, of course, Jim the leader guy. There were also various dignitaries, and heads of all manner of guilds and cartels and ex-slavers and whatnot. I'm somewhat surprised they even got Rock in here without him cracking some skulls in revenge.

But without Jocasta or Rock to act as a decent buffer, and since Emerald and the guards were occupied, it was pretty much me with Kat still on my arm against all the important people that had heard legends of what I had done and wanted to know more about me, or secure my support for various ideas and projects.

I was floundering in deep water, there. I told what tales I thought were appropriate when that question was asked. I told the truth about some of my exploits. I had no idea how to answer some of their questions, about personal plans or supporting so-and-so. Thankfully, Kat made herself useful and answered those for me, "Nav doesn't know much about the local politics yet. Give him a few weeks and he might have an answer."

I didn't mention that I was going to be gone in a few weeks.

Jim did make a point to ask me a few questions himself. "So what brings you back to Africa, Navarone? I know your first experience here didn't paint a nice picture in your mind of our land."

"I'm here as extra muscle for the security detachment. I fear I'll be needed now more than ever, after one of our diplomats already had an unfortunate and fatal accident."

"The deserts are a dangerous place, as I'm sure we both well know. How long are you going to be here?"

"I'm only going to be here for about a month or so, depending on how well Emerald Script settles in. I imagine they'll be here as long as they're needed, or allowed."

"A month, eh? I'll have to arrange another meeting in that time. We have some matters to discuss, you and I."

"My first responsibility is to the Equestrian crown, but if I have no responsibilities for the princess to do, I'll come at your call."

"You don't have to fake any nationalism for my behalf, Nav. I know where your loyalties lie."

To myself and whoever holds my leash at the time, is what I wanted to say. I instead answered with, "You might. Tell me later when you want to talk, and I'll see if I can be there."

He nodded, and the swirls of the party swept us around and I found myself facing yet another rich merchant. I sighed inwardly and got ready to tell yet another tale of the last bloody battle we fought.

About an hour after the party thing started, Kat started trying to get me alone. I don't know if she wanted to talk in private or do something a bit more intimate, but either way I was forced to deny her.

"I can't, lass. I'm a part of security. If I leave and something happens, it'll mean my head."

"I wasn't near you when your princess joined us at the canal, but I was able to see her from where I was. The way she was looking at you, she would never harm you. Besides, nothing will happen here. Despite some of their words, even the slavers realize we probably need Equestria's help, now that we lost our slave labor. No one would dare harm the diplomat."

"You don't know Celestia like I do. And you say no one will harm Emerald Script, but I can't afford to take that chance. We can talk later, back at the embassy."

After a few more half-hearted attempts to pull me away, she gave up. Despite myself, I realized I actually did want to talk to her later.

About two hours after the party started, I was beginning to wish I had taken her up on that offer. This bloody thing was boring as hell, without a Twilight or someone else to romance. Emerald's other guards were taking the wait well, but this is what they were trained for. I was getting bored of answering question after question from various dignitaries about pony politics or my personal stance on things.

A few seemed to think I was closer to Celestia than I actually was, and asked all manner of disturbing questions that I don't want to repeat here in case she actually reads this.

Several were far more subtle with their questions, asking me small things about the state of Equestria itself. My answers, if I had given them, would have told them all manner of things about Celestia's leadership and the state of the economy there.

The party was nearing its third hour when I just said fuck it. The dignitaries were leaving and being replaced by a new batch, and I was determined to bail before more people could pester me with questions. Duty is great, and all, but I'm really not the kind of person to just stand around and talk to people like these for hours.

I managed to abandon Kat while she was talking to someone in my stead, and carefully picked my way to Emerald. She was looking about as bored as I felt, but hell, this was actually her job.

When she saw me waiting to talk, she made to finish her conversation with the random cat she was talking to, and motioned me forward. I asked, "How's your first day as an ambassador?"

"Exhausting. You owe me a lot for killing Calix."

"It was for the best and you know it."

"So what did you want? I assume there's a reason you abandoned your… friend to talk to me."

"I was planning on asking if I was needed here any longer. Parties like this… they aren't my style."

"And you decided to actually consult my opinion first? Shocking."

"In public, you're in charge, lass. Besides, I'm supposed to be an operative, basically. If I finish talking to you and then mysteriously disappear, it means they'll suspect you sent me off to do something. And if I were to do, say, this," as I pulled a dagger smoothly out of my boot and made a show of cleaning my fingernails as I continued, "and then left, people will suspect what you sent me to do was dangerous, furthering the image I'm supposed to have."

"And what makes you think we're being watched? I see no one looking at us."

"You're the official star of this party, and I'm the unofficial one. And instead of talking to others, as we're supposed to be, we're talking to each other. Everyone in this room is watching us."

"And if I am asked why you approached me instead of the other way around?"

"You have magic that no one here understands. Just imply that you used it to call me."

"Based on what you've seen so far, how likely is there to be an actual attack here, today?"

"Very unlikely. Your guards are watching people like hawks, and there are local guards spread throughout the crowd disguised like merchants. Anyone other than me that pulls a knife in this party will be put down like a bloody dog before they get within five feet of you." I sheathed the knife.

"Go, then. But leave your cat friend here. I might need her later."

"With pleasure." With a mocking bow and a large smile on my face, I disappeared through a side door I had earlier judged to be unlocked. Thankfully, it led to a corridor instead of a broom closet, which would have been very awkward.

I wandered around the palace for a few minutes, completely and totally lost. I finally approached a servant and asked him to lead me to a balcony. I got an odd look, but I fluttered my wings a bit and he nodded, as if understanding.

When he got me to one, I thanked the fellow, pulled myself onto the ledge, spread my wings wide, and jumped.

It was a nice, short flight back. I scared a few local guards that weren't expecting any fliers, though.

I found that there was, thankfully, a roof access on our building. I pulled the hatch open from outside and looked in.

And saw two cat assassins looking back at me with complete surprise in their eyes.

I don't know who was more surprised. I just know I recovered first, and slammed the door shut as they tried to pull themselves up, breaking some of their fingers. These two were well trained, though, and made no noise as they forced the door open with me still on it, trying to hold it down.

They were well trained, and I was not trained at all. I had been in a few live fights, but most of what I did was slitting throats, or running away until I could get in the air. All I had were two knives in my boots, while they had who knows what. I took off into the air as soon as they forced the hatch open, and I ripped one of my knives out and threw it, hoping to get lucky.

I did. It hit one of them in the shoulder as he was pulling himself out of the hole. He fell back in, unable to hold himself up.

The other kept coming. Thankfully, they weren't expecting to be fighting anything outside like this, and didn't have any real ranged weapons, other than a few knives actually made for throwing. Those, the assassin did his best to hit me with. I got incredibly lucky, as one hit an iron plate in my clothing and bounced off. I'm going to have to kiss Rarity for that… My luck dried up, though, as his next two nailed straight through one of my wings and stuck there.

I don't know if you've ever seen an injured bird flop to the ground, but to be quite honest it's kind of funny. I decided I wouldn't laugh at it anymore, though, now that it happened to me and I know how it felt. I hit the roof of the building hard, and if it wasn't made of… whatever the hell it was made of, it probably would have collapsed under me.

Honestly, as I saw the assassin walk towards me, I thought that would have been a pretty good thing. I would rather survive with some broken bones than die with a slit throat.

I struggled to my feet and pulled my second dagger out of my boot. The assassin stopped when he saw that.

"If you leave right now, I might consider letting you go," I told him.

"Your head was not the one requested, but I'm sure we would be paid for it just the same. If you give in now, I'll make it painless."

Well, shit. I snapped my fingers in defeat. "Well, I gave it a shot. I'm sure you'll come to regret this a lot."

Thankfully, the assassin thought I was a trained specialist fighter, and he approached me very warily. I don't know what he was expecting me to do, but I know he was not at all expecting me to tackle him. I didn't even try to use the dagger, I just jumped at him and tore him to the ground and then started punching.

He was so surprised he didn't bring his dagger to bear until he was already down, and when he tried stabbing me I just grabbed his hand with both of mine and smashed it down onto the roof, forcing him to drop his weapon.

Before I go on, I feel I should mention this: I found out somewhat early on in the Egypt campaign that I was stronger than almost every single cat there. Physically, at least. My bones were tougher and I had more physical strength. They were fast, of course, but I was stronger. If I could get them in a position like this, there was nothing they could do but try to claw me to death.

Which this one most definitely tried to do after I broke his hand that had the dagger. He got one good swipe in on my face before I returned the gesture to his face, breaking his nose and completely knocking him out.

I didn't trust that, though, so I went ahead and nailed him to the roof by his wrists with his own daggers. That accomplished, I checked my wings for damage.

I almost regretted doing that. My left wing was completely fucked. What were normally white feathers were covered in crimson blood, though both of the daggers were thankfully still in, preventing too much from flowing out. I was hoping they weren't poisoned, or leaving them in like that would sign my death warrant.

My wing was looking nasty as hell, but I didn't think there would be any permanent damage, and it didn't look bad enough to need to be dealt with immediately, so I went to check on the other assassin. I grabbed some daggers from the fellow nailed to the roof and slowly peered down the still open hatch.

"What did you do to my apprentice, you monster?"

"Broke his nose, one of his hands, and nailed him to the ceiling by his wrists. He might survive, but he'll never use his hands again. Looks like that won't matter too much to you, though."

That was true. There's a major artery or vein—I forget which—leading from the shoulder into the arm. Cut through that and your enemy will die very, very quickly, unless they are able to stem the flow somehow.

This guy wasn't able to do that, and he was leaking blood all into the room that he was laying in. By the time I got to look at him, he was too weak to even raise his other arm to throw the knife he was barely able to grasp. For good measure, I threw another dagger at him that went straight into his chest. He died hissing.

Look, I don't take chances, and he was dead anyway.

I was afraid to leave this assassin alive up here, but I knew I couldn't kill him without questioning him. I was also afraid to jump into the hatch, in case there was another assassin in waiting down there. But I knew I couldn't get down unless I went in this way; this building wasn't that huge, but it was big enough that I might break something if I jumped off it, and there was no way I could glide down with my wing like this.

So it was with much trepidation that I jumped into the hatch, landing in a crouch as I looked all around me at once.

Seeing nothing, I ripped the dagger from the assassin's chest and looked for the door out of this secret room.

It didn't take me long to find, and not a minute later I and the two guards here were combing the building for any other assassin groups. We didn't find any, thank God.

Before I let my wounds be bound by one of the cat servants we had, I got one of the guards to boost me up to the ceiling, where I pulled the assassin down and into the building. He was still alive, for better or for worse.

With his wounds cauterized and bound—no reason to waste time cleaning them well if he might not survive the questioning—I finally allowed the daggers to be pulled from my wing.

The daggers were serrated. It hurt like hell. The wounds were treated as well as possible and bound. I was hoping Emerald knew some healing, but I doubted it.

The cuts on my face hurt worse than the ones on my wings. They stung like a bitch. I was afraid to look in a mirror, but I know it wasn't pretty. The servants cleaned them and wrapped them as well as possible.

One of the guards asked me, after I had been treated, "Who do you think sent them?"

"Doesn't matter. They showed their hand, and we have one of them alive. I don't think I'll be able to make him talk, but I'll certainly try."

The other guard asked, "Do you think we should send word to the ambassador? Or the king?"

"No to both. Assassins here mean there won't be assassins waiting for her, at least not from the same person. They don't come cheap, so no one would hire more than they need. These two snuck in when there was almost no one here so they could hide until night. If we show that we already took these two out, there's a chance that whoever did it will make a move openly while Emerald is surrounded by hundreds of cats that the assassin can blend into. And we can't tell the king because they might have been his men. If we told him, he could force Emerald Script into somewhere, ostensibly for her safety, but really so he could fabricate a story of how an assassin snuck in to kill her."

"So what do we do now?"

"Wait for this bastard to wake up, and wait for Emerald Script to get back."

"Speaking of that, why are you here, anyway? Aren't you supposed to be guarding her?"

"I got bored of the party."

"Why did Princess Celestia send you here, again?" the day guard asked.

"To deal with shit like this," with a gesture at the injured assassin. "I'd like to see you try to question him. Hooves have no delicacy, and we couldn't trust any cat to do it; they might 'accidentally' slip a dagger in the wrong place and end the questioning prematurely."

"You have a scary mind, human."

Of course, all of my plans were contingent on the assassins being overconfident. If they had someone watching the roof to report success or failure, Emerald might already be dead. There was no need worrying these guards about that, though. If she was dead, we were all three getting the hell out of this place. I wouldn't even stop to say bye.

Okay, I started thinking about it, and I realized my descriptions about the embassy we were in might be hasty and confused. Realize, though, that I typically don't write such things as that down, since they stick in my mind enough to make it not worth the paper used to record it. We had five cat servants, though none were trusted enough to be anywhere near our private conversations, like the one I just had with the guards.

There were ten bedrooms primarily dedicated for use by ponies—and me, since I was with them. Two were not in use, since Calix wasn't here. The two ambassador rooms had decent sized offices in them. I took over the second ambassador room, since it wasn't exactly being used. All ten of these rooms were on the second floor.

The third floor was storage and servant rooms. I found the assassins hiding up here.

The first floor was everything else: kitchens, dining areas, a small greeting hall, and two sitting rooms. Small hidden rooms were dotted here and there, but most were, as I said, small.

After we found the assassins, I mandated that all hidden rooms were to be kept open, and that if they were ever closed for something they would be presumed to be hiding assassins.

We didn't have to wait long for the assassin to wake up. And when he did, we definitely knew it; he woke up screaming about his hands.

I slapped him across the face. He kept yelling. I slapped him again. Finally, I covered his mouth with my hand and hoped he wouldn't bite me.

"When I remove my hand, you will answer my questions." I waited until some recognition returned to his eyes. "Who hired you?" I removed my hand.

He regained his composure very quickly. "You know I can't tell you that."

"Look, I'm not in the mood for this. Every time you refuse to tell me something, I will remove something from your body. I will ask you again, who hired you?"

He didn't say anything.

I took a dagger, forced his mouth open, and pried out a front tooth.

"Who hired you?"

"You're crazy!"

"Look, I don't like hurting people. I really don't. But if you keep this up, I will keep hurting you. I will remove all your teeth, I will remove your fingers joint by joint, I will remove your toes, and then I'll just get creative." He stared at me in horror. "I'm not a trained torturer. I take no pleasure in it, either. But I promise you, I will not let you die if you don't tell me what I want to know. I will cut off everything, and leave you alive. I will drop you off in the middle of a city with nothing and leave you there, after making sure you're fed enough to survive for a while. Who hired you?"

I don't know if it was the pleasant, calm voice I said it in, or the words themselves, but he opened up a bit.

"I… I don't know who paid the money, but we were contacted by a pony called Joseph. He was red, with a mark of hooves." Anton…

"Where and when are you to meet him again?"

"In three days, at the base of the Sphinx."

"What was your mission?"

"Kill the ambassadors."

"Why?"

"We weren't told. Please, I don't know!" It didn't matter, anyway.

"Was there any manner of code that you needed to get to this pony that contacted you, or did you just have to be there?"

"I don't know! My partner had all the details!"

I pried another tooth out.

"Please, I don't know!"

I cut off a knuckle on his left pinky finger, and then cauterized it with a dagger I had sitting in a bed of coals. The two pony guards watching were looking somewhat queasy. I felt the same way; I detest causing pain. I absolutely fucking hate it. But there was a point to this pain. I needed answers if I was going to keep Emerald alive.

The prisoner was trying not to scream. I gave him a minute, and then demanded an answer. He finally gave it, weeping, "The rising sun will not set here."

"Good…" I gagged him and wiped the dagger off on his coat.

He gazed at me piteously, perhaps wishing for a mercy I was loath to grant him yet.

"First lesson, son: Check information before you kill the prisoner. We'll see if your contact is where he's supposed to be, first. So," I said, turning to the guards, "how do we dispose of bodies discretely here?"

They both looked like they were about to be sick.

I sighed. "I have to do everything around here, don't I?"

In the end, I stripped the body of everything useful and wrapped it in a carpet. I tied the bundle to the back of one the guards and told them to dump it in the Nile while no one was looking.

Seriously.

I could have actually disposed of it in a smart way, if I cared enough, but I didn't have the time or the room, or some of the supplies. If I had more time before Emerald got back I would have, at the very least, carried it a day into the desert. But I also had a date to make with Anton.

Still, I figured the Nile had a pretty high number of bodies dumped into it, and one more wouldn't raise too many suspicions.

Rarity's poor clothes… They were pretty covered in blood, now, and cut in some places from the knife that hit iron plates and bounced oddly. I know I said I hated the getup, but I also know that a lot of work went into it, and I regret that it had to come to such a sad end. Especially after it saved my life.

I went up to my room to change.

When I was up there, I saw a mirror. Oh yeah, that'll be a scar… Thankfully, he missed my eyes, my nostrils, and my lips. Still, the cuts went pretty deep. Magic might be able to stop it from scarring, but I don't know. All in all, though, I think I came out of that encounter on top. Thank God for luck, I suppose.

I changed and then went to wait for either Emerald or the two guards, whoever got back first.

While I waited I worked to catch up a bit on my journal. I did what I could, but my head was starting to hurt. Not the stinging hurt from the cuts, but a headache caused by the pain of the cuts. Or at least, that's what I was hoping it was; I didn't think to ask the assassin if any of his stuff was poisoned.

So much for the coming spring I was promised. I left in our spring and got here in their fall, soon to be winter. And here I was, killing people again. This time I even had the choice—and a good reason—to have kept Calix alive. I still hate killing, detest it even, but it's starting to feel less and less like something I'm forced to do and something I just accept as necessary.

If this is what the future holds in store for me, I'm glad I haven't taken Celestia's offer of near eternal life.

Emerald took another hour to get back with her escort of four guards and Kat. Emerald took one look at my face and blood-stained wing and ordered everyone else out of the room. "What happened?"

"Assassins waiting in a hidden room upstairs. One dead, one upstairs, bound. I have the name, location, and time they need to meet their contact."

"Where's the body of the dead one?" Not how did he die, but where are the bodies. This chick was going places.

"The guards that were here are dumping it in the Nile. I removed everything of value from him first, so it would look like a robbery if he's found."

"What do you think we should tell the king?"

"Nothing, until I meet with the contact. We don't know if the king is the one behind it."

"He could give us help we desperately need, now that we know we're a target."

"Help that could wait until our backs are turned before slipping a knife in us. We wait until we deal with the contact. The problem is, I know this guy, the contact. He knows how I look when I wear desert clothes, so I can't be the one that meets him, not personally. We need two cats we can trust to go, or I can shoot him from afar and move in close to secure him before he can get too far away. Or we can abandon all subtlety and just sprint in and take him."

"It might send a better message if we just don't show up. I don't know if I want to risk anypony going after this guy. You dealing with these assassins might be enough of a message to the rest."

"I'll be gone in a month, lass. I'd rather take out the man that sent the assassins than hope that he won't send any more."

"Who could we send to collect their contact, though?"

"Without telling anyone, I don't know. I would say the best thing to do would be to just take him out as fast as possible, but I can't fly with my wings like this. I could shoot him from afar and send the guards in to collect him, but he might not be alone. I know our guards are fighters, but I don't think they've ever been in a real fight. Especially not against someone with a blade."

"If you really think we need to do this that might be the best option."

"Well, I did say I wanted to see the Sphinx… The contact will be there in three days. I don't know when, so I guess we'll be camping there for a bit."

"What should I do in the meantime?"

"Act natural. If anyone asks why I'm injured just say it had to do with why I left the party."

"What if the contact isn't there? If I'm seen after today, and no big fuss is made about me being dead, he probably won't even show up."

Shit, why didn't I think of that? "We still need to try. If he doesn't show he doesn't show. Maybe we'll get lucky."

"What about the assassin that's still alive?"

"Depending on how the meeting with the contact goes, I'll drag the assassin to the king and use him as proof that we were attacked. If we find out that the king ordered the attack, we use the assassin as proof that the king tried to kill us."

"Can I see him?"

"I don't know if you want to. If you think I look bad, this guy might make you sick. He was… reluctant… to share information."

"You didn't… torture him?"

"When I ask questions, I expect an answer."

"You monster!"

"I know. I don't suppose you know how to heal?"

"I wouldn't heal you if I could! I might have some mercy on the prisoner, but not you, not after that!"

"He was going to kill you! I was just protecting you!"

"Take me to him."

I did.

He was passed out or dead, I don't know which. Blood loss and shock probably had him near death. The gag was bloody from the teeth I removed, and the coagulated blood from his wrists and pinky made nasty little pools where he lay. The mass of burnt tissue and fur on both arms where I nailed him to the roof made it quite clear he would never use his hands again.

Emerald took one look at him and left the room. She refused to even look at me.

I went to find Kat and the other guards. I found her idly toying with the ends of one of their wings, much to that guard's discomfort. The other guards were watching with veiled humor.

"Guards, go talk to Emerald Script. She has a bit to fill you in on."

They left, after giving my injuries several odd looks. Kat was staring at the dried blood staining my wing.

When the guards left, she asked, "What happened to you, Nav?"

"I ran into a scrap. Tell me, do you recognize this?" I said, handing her one of the assassin's daggers.

She was clearly surprised to see it, and dropped it in shock when she looked at it. "Where did you get this?"

"I ran into two cats that seemed to think it was a good idea to attack me."

"Did you kill them?"

"I killed half of them. The other one lives, but is in no position to attack again."

"Good! The guild that these two work for will only take on a single job to take out a target. If they fail, the will never try again, since the target earned the right to live by taking out the assassins sent." People here are so stupid! Why is honor such a big factor in this world?

"How do you know so much about them?"

"They used to use slaves as assassins." She left it at that. Interesting…

"I need you to not tell the king about this yet, if you can avoid it. Their contact is due to meet them in three days, and I don't know if it was the king that hired them to do this."

"The contact will never show up if the mark isn't dead. And you can't afford to fake a death, not this soon. And I have to tell the king. It's my job."

"I'll let you help wash my wing if you wait."

"I don't know if it would be worth it, Nav. I'm really fond of my head."

"If anyone asks why you didn't tell him, just say that you didn't know. If anyone asks how I got injured, just say that it was part of why I was sent from the party."

Her eyes widened a bit. "That's why you left? How did she know there were assassins?"

"She's a unicorn. They have magic." Well, that sounds better than, 'I don't like parties so I left and got lucky when I ran into them.'

"You are a very dangerous team, you and that unicorn."

"That's why I'm here, lass. Do we have an agreement?"

"Throw in letting me see the assassin before you kill him, and yes."

"If he's still alive, you can. I don't know if he'll survive what I did to him."

"You'll have to tell me the story while we're… washing."

An indeterminate amount of time later found us lounged on my bed, with me lying across her lap and her idly stroking my healthy wing—which actually felt kind of nice, now that it wasn't forced.

"You realize, of course, that if you show up there will probably be a trap," she was saying.

"Shit, you're bloody right." She was, now that I thought about it. It would be the perfect chance to catch and kill the guards—and me—that came to try to collect the informant. "Dammit, that means we either can't go or we're going to have to be very careful. God, I wish we could trust mercenaries…"

"What would you say if I could get you the strongest fighter and best assassin in Egypt?"

"I'd say no." I paused. "Christ, one way or another we'll have to tell the king. Might as well get a contingent of guards to help us."

"You don't trust me?"

"There's only so many favors I'm willing to accept before I start thinking you're saving up for something."

She snorted at that. "What could I possibly need from a citizen of Equestria?"

"Depends on what you're looking for. Adventure, escape, who knows?"

She flinched when I said escape. "Well, I was going to wait a while to bring this up, but… It's nice, working with Jocasta and Rock, but there are still some cats here in Egypt that don't much like the idea of me walking free. That problem might be solved with that assassin you have locked up, it might not. If he's the one, or his friend was, I owe you more than you can possibly know."

"If you want, we can go see him now. He might be awake. Now that I'm pretty sure we're going to have to tell the king anyway, I don't see any problem with it."

She got a very vicious smile on her face. I warned her, "Don't kill or hurt him anymore than he already is. We might still need him as proof."

"Don't worry, Nav. No matter what kind of training your sadistic princess might have given you, no one knows how to torture better than I. I know the limits of every cat's body, just by looking at it."

Kat scares me more and more every time I talk to her.

The day guard Emerald posted was reluctant to let Kat through. "Navarone, Emerald Script said no cat was to enter this room."

"She got that instruction from me. I'm rescinding it. This lass just pointed out something that likely saved all our lives anyway, so the least you could do is stand aside."

"I don't know…" he said. "Do you think we should at least ask the ambassador first?"

"She isn't talking to me right now. Move."

With a very uncertain look at Kat, he did. I didn't have to look behind me to know she had a Cheshire cat grin on her face.

That smile lessened when she saw the fellow on the table. "That's an apprentice," she told me. "An older one, but an apprentice. You might have killed the master he was working under. And you almost killed this one, looking at him. What the hell did you do to him, Nav?"

"I'm not as good at torturing people as you are. I just cut pieces of him off until he talked. He's missing a few teeth and a knuckle. And he'll never use his hands again."

"Killing him will be a mercy, then. An assassin is no good without hands. Can you wake him up?"

I prodded the fellow. He groaned as he woke up, and I swear I think he almost teared up when he saw me.

Kat saw that and giggled. "There's something to be said for crudeness, I suppose. Remember me, Mark?"

The prisoner turned his head at her and his eyes widened even more. I removed his gag.

"Cleo? You're supposed to be… My master was right!"

"You're lucky I've promised not to hurt you, or you would be feeling more pain for using that name. Still, I know a few ways to bribe my friend here. He might let me have some fun with you. So watch your tone, boy."

"What do you want, traitor?"

She looked to me. I shook my head, slightly.

"Information," she answered, frowning. "Your master is still the one that wanted me dead, yes?"

He tried spitting at her, but nothing but a wee bit of blood dribbled down his mouth. Kat looked at me again. I sighed.

I thought about this for a while, as I was writing this, and I decided not to describe anything she did to him. The guard came in as soon as he started screaming, and watched in mute horror. Whereas before, the guards just looked like they might be sick, this one actually was, at one point. I almost joined him, a few times. And the prisoner never once lost consciousness.

Kat got the information she wanted, in the end. And when she did, she couldn't stop hugging me. With her nasty, gore-encrusted hands.

As it turns out, the fellow I had killed was the main supporter in the assassination cartel that was trying to round up all the escaped assassin slaves to either force them back into the cartel or deal with them in a more permanent manner. With that fellow dead, she was safe. As safe as anyone here, at least.

Talk about coincidence. And luck. If that other guy I killed was a master assassin, and this apprentice gave me a run for my money, I wouldn't have had a snowball's chance in hell against the master.

I nodded at the guy on the table, "So what do we do with him now?"

"Give him to the king. I don't care."

"Will he survive that long?"

"Oh, yes. Nothing I did is fatal, just remarkably painful."

"I'm glad I've never pissed you off."

"Oh, come now, Nav! I'd need to study you much better to know how to cause you that much pain. You may be bipedal, but you're hardly a cat. I can torture cats, dogs, and I know a little about ponies. I wouldn't even want to try a naga. I have no idea where to even start with you. If you want, though, we can go and I can study you a bit more…"

The guard stared at her with open incredulity. I felt much the same. She had just tortured a dude, with a smile on her face the whole time, and now she wanted to…

Now I remember why I thought she was crazy.

Thankfully, I had a very good excuse. "Sadly, lass, I must pass. As you said, there's likely to be a trap set for us. I need to talk Emerald into letting me give this guy to the king, after I talked her out of it earlier. And that requires getting her to talk to me again at all."

"What did you do to put a bee in her bonnet?" How the hell would she know that idiom?

"She's a pony. A noble, at that. She doesn't like torture."

Kat looked at her paws. Her bloody, gore splattered paws. "Maybe I shouldn't go with you when you talk to her."

"That might be for the best. Go wash up. I'll have you take us back to the palace after I talk to Emerald Script." I turned to the guard, "And not a word of this to Emerald Script. If she asks how he got like this, pretend you don't speak English." I honestly didn't know if he was going to obey that. His morals should say he should tell her. Chain of command and fear says he shouldn't. Logic says he should. Hell, she was going to be in charge of him longer than I was; might as well get in her good graces.

Actually, thinking about it, I don't know how the chain of command dictated this. I mean, technically I was outside of it, not on top of it. I was here as a direct agent of the crown, basically an Inquisitor. I don't know if that gave me rank over that of an ambassador in the guards' minds, though.

I think I was going to find out soon, though.

Kat went off to the washroom. The guard took his post again. I went off to find Emerald.

Thankfully, I found her looking for me. She had a letter with her from Celestia. She gave it to me without a word, and refused to acknowledge me further.

This was going to be harder than I thought.

I sighed and opened the letter.

It read, "I expected you to wait longer to kill Calix. I sent you there with him so you would, though I will deny it to your dying day if you tell anypony I said that. I was expecting you to end up killing Emerald Script as well, honestly, but after looking at her reports I don't think that will be the case.

"It is very good you managed to deal with those assassins. But I will never allow or condone torture. From this point on you are forbidden from torturing a prisoner in my name, for any reason. I don't care what kind of information you think the prisoner might have. Don't even bother asking me for permission.

"Now that I think you might trust Emerald Script, I will actually put some real faith in this mission. I was honestly expecting it to fail. Maybe it was something you said to her, but she seems to have handled herself fine on the first day.

"I know you find this hard, but you must trust the king. If he betrays you, it honestly won't matter if you succeed or fail in this mission; I cannot support another rebellion right now. The king they have is the king they'll keep, as far as I'm concerned. If he betrays you, get out of Egypt however you can. I will allow you to do anything to do that, even torture, if it means you, Emerald Script, and the guards get back safely.

"Trusting the king means giving him the assassin. By the time you read this, Emerald Script will probably have already ordered him moved. She is very upset with you. In fact, she wanted you called back to Equestria for discipline immediately. I think some things I told her will put her back on speaking terms, but it's up to you to close that gap back up. Honestly, though, it doesn't really matter. Depending on how this situation with the assassin goes, you might soon be on your way back anyway. I don't want to cause the king political trouble by keeping you there.

"I'm expecting a full report when you get back. And expect to see Luna when you do, as well."

I looked up and noticed Kat standing behind me, trying to read over my shoulder. "Who's Luna?" she asked as I turned.

"Celestia's sister. Don't read my bloody orders."

"That looks more like a personal letter than orders, to me."

"Celestia is very informal."

"I'll say, letting her subjects call her by name."

"Most people don't, out of respect. I'm just a bad person."

"Are you sure it isn't that there's something going on between you two?"

"I'm not attracted to ponies."

"But you have no problems with cats?"

"You look a hell of a lot more like a human than they do." And I suppose I got used to it while it was forced is something I kind of wanted to say.

She sniffed at that. "I'd be willing to put good salt on your princess being willing to take you as a lover, if you asked."

"Trust me when I say she wouldn't even consider it. Drop it."

"Fine. But you're the one missing out."

I can just imagine Celestia laughing her ass off if she was eavesdropping on that conversation. Either way, I think it'll be something to leave out of my 'report.'

"Now, we need to head Emerald Script and the guards off, if they are escorting this prisoner to the king. Yes, we have to let him go, but I should probably be there when he gets presented."

"Nav, you're not all important. Put some faith in your ambassador. That might be a good way to get back on her good side."

"This is a hell of a thing to trust her with. If she screws this up she might piss the king off as bad as if it was actually him that sent the assassins. And if it was him, I might have to pull her out of the fire."

"If it was the king, there's nothing you can do. By now, if they're already gone. And trust has to start somewhere. Might as well be here."

"…Was it the king?"

"As far as I know, no, it wasn't. And I'm not lying, either. My word, to the one that saved my life."

I sighed. "Fine. But if it ends up with our heads on the block, do your best to speak on my behalf. If Emerald Script screws it up, that's on her. But I don't want to lose my head for her mistake."

"I won't let the king kill you. I know a few good places to hide you, if it comes to that."

"I'll go ahead and tell you that the last time I tried hiding in the king's harem, it didn't turn out well for me at all. I don't even want to talk about it."

"Well, I still have plenty of other hiding spots, but that was actually one of them. You'll have to tell me that story one day."

"That might be a bad idea, for more reasons than one. But if I can't watch to make sure Emerald Script does the right thing, I will at least need to know what she does. Would you be willing to go and spy for me?"

"I'm hardly privy to the king's briefings with foreign powers."

"But you are an ex-assassin. I'm sure you could manage to sneak in."

"Hm… Will you promise to take me flying?"

"If my wing heals before I leave, and I don't have any duties preventing me, yes. With my wing as it is, I don't know if I could get myself in the air, let alone someone else."

"You're lucky we're such good friends, human. I don't think I'd let many people talk me into something like this."

"A friend with benefits is the best kind of friend there is."

"We don't have that term here, but I think I know what you mean. We call it something else." I think I could guess.

"Good luck, lass, and thanks. Report back whenever you can."

"What will you be doing, in the mean time?"

"I wish I could say that I would be starting up a spy network across the city, but these wounds really, really hurt. Hell, I don't know how to set up something like that anyway. You'll have to help me with it."

"Why would you even need it?"

"It's in the best interest of a foreign ambassador to know how the people feel about them. That way, they know how hard they can push the king. If the king tries to go to war or kick out the ambassador of a popular nation, the people will be unhappy. And the people here just got done with one manner of revolution, so don't think that won't be fresh on their mind."

"It is good you are able to think in matters of politics. My specialties are somewhat… different. I might help you make your network, later. For now, I will see you soon."

I went to find how many guards I was left with. I wasn't planning on doing anything, but I needed to know if they were still in my camp, after Emerald found out what happened to the prisoner. I could foresee a few problems if she was trying to undermine my authority over them. The authority that might or might not exist. It would be good, in the long run, if they were supporting Emerald over me.

But at the same time, I knew that if I had only Kat's support in the coming days, I would run into several problems. First, that I'd lose legitimacy. I would look more like an agent of the king rather than an agent of Celestia. Second, I didn't know how far I could trust Kat. She said I saved her life, but that could have been a ruse to get my trust. That assassin definitely knew her, but he didn't confirm anything she told me, and the things he did say could have been said under stress of torture. She could just be working for the king to get into my inner circle, to hopefully learn whatever she could. Which could have been why she was reading over my shoulder. Third, working with her for too long would drive me mad. Fourth, I'll need the guards' trust if I'm to keep the ambassador safe, even if she is being bitchy. And finally, they're just fun to talk to sometimes.

With that in mind, I went to find a guard. When I did, I said, "So the ambassador is kind of mad at me."

The day guard didn't say anything.

"I need to know, how long are the guards going to be on my side?"

He looked away.

I said, "I know you're only following orders. And I know you don't like what I did to the prisoner. But some things have to be done. You have your orders and I have mine. And you're wise to listen to her over me; in the long run it will benefit you more. Assuming she survives. But I will likely need some help in the coming weeks with things that the ambassador will not approve of. I may be an agent of the crown, but I'm not perfect. Will I be able to count on the support of the guards?"

He took a minute to respond. "I can't speak for us all. I detest what you did to that prisoner. It sickened me. And then you let that… monster at him. But I understand that you are doing it for Equestria, and to build trust with the king here. Our loyalty is to Equestria and Celestia above all else, even the ambassador. If you can give a good reasoning for what you do, and I can get away from the ambassador, I will help you if you call. But I cannot speak for the rest."

"That's all I can ask for, I suppose. If you're going to be supporting me, the first thing I'll need help with is an escape route. I need as many as I can get. Assume in some that we have the ambassador and that in some we don't, so we can utilize wings."

"Why would you want our help with that?"

"Because I can't think of everything myself. There will always be something I'll miss. The more people that scrutinize a plan, the better the chances of ironing out all the small problems." And the more likely that plan is to be scrapped.

"I'll give it some thought."

I nodded, thanked the fellow, and went up to my room. My face really was burning where it was scratched. The cuts weren't large, but they were deep. There was a lot to do. Escape routes to plan, spy networks to build, important people to get on our side, Anton to deal with… Well, it would be interesting, anyway. Hm. May you live in interesting times, indeed.

Kat didn't report back to me until the next morning, which I honestly didn't mind that much. It was pretty late by the time Emerald and the guards got back anyway, so it probably would have been later by the time she got back. Either way, I was asleep, so she would have had to wake me up.

And when I did wake up, I woke up groaning. My head was pounding and my wing wasn't that much better. I checked my face in the mirror and saw a bit of fresh blood on the bandages. Not much, but enough that they had to be changed.

I was doing that when Kat waltzed in, without knocking and with no announcement. I heard the door open and was scrambling for a dagger before I realized it was her. She smiled at that.

"I have good news for you, Navarone," she said, as she sat on my bed. "But I don't know if I should give it to you, yet. You still seem rather… undressed."

"Doors were invented for a reason, lass." I didn't even bother hastening to cover up, but I did at least put some pants on.

"You didn't have to put anything on, you know. I could think of some fun things to do after I tell you the news."

"Pleasure will have to wait, I fear. There is much to be done and I've only a short while in which to do some of it."

"Fine, have it your way. You won't have to deal with the informer at all. The king has taken over the investigation."

"Shit. That's good and bad. I don't know if I should be happy or sad about it."

"Less work for you."

"And I have no way to influence how it works out. And I have no way of knowing if the king will be honest in his dealings with the assassin cabal, if he ever roots them out. I don't even know if he'll try. Good for the king, that he's doing this, but not as good for me. He gets the approval from the people that he's actively trying to root out crime, and everyone that's pro-Equestria will be happy he's helping us."

"Either way, it is still good for your image, especially given that little show you put on at the party before you left."

"True." I wasn't about to tell her that image was the only reason I was here anyway. I don't know why I had so many plans in the first place. Honestly, all I had to do was spend the month looking threatening. Escape plans are always good to have, of course. But the spy network was completely my idea and mostly unnecessary. I just wanted to try it because I thought it would be interesting.

"Did Emerald Script handle herself well during the interview?"

"Remarkably so. It wasn't how I would have handled it, but she did very well for herself. You're worrying over nothing, Nav. She'll be fine."

"Good enough for me. What did the king do with the assassin?"

She smiled. "You can hear his screams from half a kilometer away."

"Emerald Script will be pleased at that, I imagine…"

"That was the one stickling point. She proposed to let him go. The king… disagreed."

"Good that he did. I don't want to let the enemy know what I'm capable of."

"You took out an assassination team headed by a high master. I think they're well aware of what you can do." Luck. Lots and lots of luck.

"Personally, I'd have just killed the fellow. No reason to keep him alive anymore, other than sadistic glee."

"Maybe for your kind of investigation. But when you want to take down the entire cabal, everything you can learn is useful. Shame you killed the master and captured the apprentice."

"What's done is done. I don't know what Emerald Script has planned for the day, but now that the whole assassin problem is being dealt with, I would like to get started on that bloody spy network. I figure the first place we should start is the brothels."

"You would say that."

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah, but still." I know it sounds odd, but who hears the most news in a city? Brothels, of course. When men have sex, they talk. And when men come in on caravans or whatnot, the first place they go is to a brothel. So if you can get the brothels reporting to you things that people say, you'll often hear news from outside of the town before anyone else does, and in a generally more pure way, without having to deal with rumors.

"After that, I was thinking about hitting up taverns, seeing who is pro-Equestria and who isn't. Slip a little gold here and there, see who is willing to send a few scraps of info our way."

"Better be careful with bits, in this city. Flash too much of that and footpads might get a little eager with their knives."

"Between you and me I think we can handle everything that comes after us. And if all else fails, either of us could requisition a detachment of guards to escort us back to friendly territory."

"If we have to do that, your entire network will collapse. It would be all over the streets."

"I'd rather be alive with nothing than dead with something."

"Just saying."

"I don't really care what the criminals are doing here, so we really don't have to hit too many seedy taverns anyway."

"It's always a good idea to know what the criminal element is doing."

"For me and you, maybe. But I won't be here forever. Emerald Script won't care, when she inherits the system."

"Do you honestly think she'll use it anyway?"

"If she's as smart as you think she is, yes. Information networks can go both ways. Slip something you want known out, and you can get it spread all over the city in a heartbeat."

"If you've never done this before, how do you know so much about it?"

I read a lot. "Training."

"Sounds good to me, then. Shall we go see what the ambassador plans?"

"Might as bloody well," I said. "If she's willing to talk to me."

I put on more clothing, and finished changing the bandage first. No reason to go to her half naked and bloody.

When we got to the ambassador's room, the guard let us in with a small warning, "Be careful, Navarone."

Emerald was at a desk, writing. She looked up when I entered, and said, "Sit, Navarone, Kat."

I still haven't figured out why ponies have chairs. How the hell do they sit down?

Anyway, we both did. Kat was about to say something, but I took her hand and shook my head slightly, then let her go. Emerald was trying the same trick Jocasta pulled on me: Wait them out to make them give up control in the conversation. If Kat was on my side here, and she spoke first, it would hurt me.

So we waited. Thankfully, Emerald didn't have much time to try to outwait us, and gave up that tactic after ten minutes.

"I trust your letter from the princess suited you," she said to me, looking up.

"I'm glad I got it when I did. A few minutes sooner and it would have put a real damper on things." She pursed her lips. I knew antagonizing her probably wasn't a wise move, especially now, but eh.

"I was beginning to think, before this incident, that you truly regretted what happened with Calix." She was being discrete because Kat was there, I assumed. "But this little episode is making me think otherwise. The letter I received from the princess paints you in an interesting light, but she is not here. She is not seeing what I am seeing. She did not see the body of that cat as he struggled to breathe. Why she is letting you, of all ponies, represent Equestria is beyond me."

I can honestly see where Emerald is coming from with that, and looking back I can agree. These cat people have had one oppressive and torturous regime after another. They've known crime, torture, and oppression. Now, they finally have a chance for peace, and to be allied with a massive, strong, peaceful foreign empire. But their image for that empire is me. I was there at the revolution and I'm here now. I'm violent, 'powerful,' and strong. And I represent the interests of a peaceful nation. What kind of 'better tomorrow' do I promise? I would just seem like more of the same, once you got past the whole revolution thing.

So yes, I can see where she's coming from. But at the same time, I did what had to be done. There is no other way around it. I would not have known what I now know without asking the questions I did, and using the methods I did to ask them.

So I just said, "You've heard my rationalizations. There is no need for me to explain it again. What is on today's agenda?"

"The king is keeping me out of sight until the day after they try to intercept the contact. I'm to remain here until then. You, however, are to be seen about in the city, asking questions. Kat, would you kindly leave us for a moment?"

Kat stood up and, with a small bow, walked out.

When she was gone, Emerald said, "Your fascination with her cannot get in the way of your duties. Or in the way of my duties. And you can't take her back to Equestria, either, so don't even get that thought in your head."

"Why the hell would I want to do that? That bitch scares the hell out of me! I wouldn't have her anywhere within a hundred miles of either princess, or any of my friends."

"But you have no problem being around her, or letting her come here?"

"She is useful. But she has a price, of course."

"Keep that price in mind when you deal with her. If it is something you alone cannot pay, don't accept her help. I don't want to get Equestria involved in your debts."

"Different kind of price," I said, with a general motion I'm sure she understood.

"And the king gave her to us as a guide? This place is crazy, Navarone."

"I warned you. I warned the guards. I warned Celestia. Just be glad we're not down in the Congo. The heart of darkness down there would have driven all of you mad."

"…What?"

"Nothing. Just something from back in my world. What kind of questions do I need to be asking?"

"Anything. Offer bribes, if you have to. Those, the treasury will cover, if I deem them necessary." Perfect. "I would order you to take guards, but they wouldn't follow that order if I gave it. I don't know what you did to them, but they seem to be on your side more often that they're on mine."

"Their loyalty is to the princesses above all else. And she gave you the status of ambassador and me the status of agent of the crown. Agents are usually outside of the chain of command, meaning that I can usually avoid having to follow orders given but can at the same time give orders, if I can justify them well enough. Doesn't mean they have to be followed, though."

"Why did Princess Celestia tell me none of this?"

She was expecting you to piss me off so I'd kill you. "She probably wasn't expecting me to actually take my role seriously."

"I will have to request updated instructions on how to deal with you."
Rule one: Don't piss me off. Rule two: Let me do what I need to do.

"If that's all you need, I'll bugger off. The sooner I get into position the sooner I can get to doing nothing."

She dismissed me.

Kat was waiting for me in my room.

Wearing nothing.

I sighed. The things I do for Equestria…

An indeterminate amount of time later, we were both getting kicked out of a brothel by a very large cat.

Thankfully, I was at that time disguised, but that was hardly a consolation. When the door had been slammed behind us, I turned to her and said, "I thought you had done this before!"

"No, I let you assume that I had done this before. I've used a spy network, but I've never built one."

"…" I gave her a look mean enough so that she could hear the ellipsis.

"What?"

I shook my head. "If we keep this up we're going to get killed. Violently. Let's head back to the richer side of the city. At least there I can do what I'm supposed to be actually doing, with considerably less risk." And I can possibly build something up by making pointed remarks.

We started walking. She said to me, "If you really want to keep what you're doing here hidden, we should probably lose our tails." Meaning someone was following us. Great.

"Kill or evade?"

"Evade if possible, kill if not. Shame you can't fly yet."

We both had rucksacks with spare clothes in them, so we could move around the city with less notice. The problem with that, of course, means that we were carrying bags with something in them in them in the poor parts of the city. If there's a bag, it means you have something. Something that could be worth something.

Unless our trail knew I was human, all I had to do was take off my head mask and they'd probably turn around and walk away. Or run away, probably. But that could present problems, as they probably just saw me get kicked out of a brothel. What we needed was a place to hide for a few minutes so we could both change, or so at least I could change.

But experienced cutpurses are very good at not letting their target get out of sight, or at least not for long.

Thankfully, we were in a pretty crowded area, and neither of us actually had purses on us. They would have to confront us directly in order to get at our money, and not even a mass of poor people would let a thief get away. It was more of an annoyance than anything, really. We couldn't get too far into the richer areas without getting kicked out by guards, but neither could the follower. We couldn't change, because we might be seen. So we were stuck until we dealt with him or lost him.

"We could just politely ask him to leave," I suggested.

"How confident are you in your running skills?"

"Cats are faster than I am. But I'm stronger than most cats. Fighting this fellow shouldn't be that hard."

"I've dealt with footpads in the past. But I have never, ever tried reasoning with one. That sounds… interesting."

I wasn't expecting her to actually take me seriously. She turned and walked up to a fellow that was standing near a door, looking somewhat confused. I followed her. "So, why are you following us?" she asked.

"I… I don't know what you're talking about," he responded.

"I would very much appreciate it if you stopped," I said.

"And how else am I supposed to feed my family?" he asked vehemently. "Being in slavery for all of my life gave me no useful skills and no money! This is all I can do!"

"Not our problem. Follow us and you'll catch a blade in your heart, if you're lucky," Kat said. The poor cat following us looked like he was about to cry.

I had a bit of an idea, and snapped my fingers. I removed my head piece. The ex-slave gasped, as did a few of the cats that had stopped to watch. Now the kid really looked like he was about to run away or just die on the spot.

"Let's go for a little walk. I think you and I should talk," I said. Kat gave me a look that I ignored as I grabbed the fellow gently by the arm. He barely tried to resist as I led him along.

When we were away from most of the spectators, I put my head piece back on and led the group down a small alley.

"Now," I said, "despite what you may have heard, I'm not a monster. Well, sort of not a monster. Either way, I'm not a terrible person." A lie, of course.

"I heard you killed a thousand cats on the March of Liberation!" he accused me.

"More like ten, at most. Most of what I did was letting people free or planning. Now, in the end I was probably responsible for that many deaths, but it was not my hand that did it."

"I also heard you took on ten assassins at once recently!"

"How did that already get out?" I asked Kat. She shrugged. "Whatever. It was two. I killed one and captured the other. They attacked me first, and were going to attack my ambassador. How does that make me a monster?"

"Only a monster could kill two assassins like that."

"Or a well trained Agent of the Equestrian Crown." I made sure you could hear the capitals.

"A peaceful nation produced such a violent agent?"

"Sometimes violence is what is needed to get the job done. Sometimes, but not always. You, for example, could have been taken care of with violence. Reason and compassion are occasionally good ways of dealing with things."

"So you talk to me and let me go. What good will that do me? I'll still starve because of your actions!"

I dug in my pocket and held up a bit. "I'm offering you a job. Bits for information. I won't be here forever, and I can't keep our ambassador informed of how the city feels. I need to plant seeds and find people that are willing to send information to her. She will need to know how the people feel about Equestria and several other things. Those rich nobles she'll normally be talking to will tell her nothing but what she wants to hear. But the people will tell her the truth."

"So you want me to spy for you. Spy on my own people, for money."

"Not spying. Just telling her things she needs to know." So yes, spying. "What kind of important secrets will a peasant find? All you are doing is telling her how the city feels. You're finding opinions, not facts. And possibly news, if you think it is important."

"What makes you think anything I say will be important?"

"You are a freed slave. You are one of many. Ask friends and family questions. Ask them opinions. And when you report to the ambassador, ask her for questions to ask them. If you prove useful, you will be rewarded. If not, well, at least you tried. And if nothing else, it is a better job than risking your life as a thief. And it will give you some bits that you can use to get started learning useful skills."

He was silent for a few seconds. "I'll try," he finally said. "If nothing else, this money will keep me alive for a while. Where do I go to report?"

Oh, shit. "I don't suppose you know how to write?"

He smiled nastily. "That's the one thing I was taught, as a slave. I was a record keeper." And that's not a useful skill? Fucking Egypt, man.

"If you can, write up your reports and drop them off at the embassy. Just ask any guard where it is."

"Asking a guard where the embassy is looking like that will get you booted right back to the lower city," Kat said. She explained to him where it was. I nodded in thanks.

"Mark your notes for 'The Dude.'" To be honest, I had never seen that movie, but I thought it was a neat sounding name. Not like they would catch the reference anyway. "Oh, and don't tell anyone you're reporting to us, either."

"I won't tell a soul. Thank you for this, Sphinx." He bowed slightly and ran off.

"Well, that's one contact, at least," I said. I caught Kat smiling at me. "What, imagining me changing already?"

"You just always seem to find a way to surprise me."

"I'm good at that. Let's get out of this place."

The rest of the day was spent in richer bars and inns, playing dice games for small sums and asking questions. Kat was relatively well known, and I was very well known, so we had no lack of company. I asked a few pointed questions in each tavern about assassin cabals, and covered them up with various other questions about the culture and the area.

I was certain what I was saying was going to get reported back to the mastermind.

I also won a few games and got a nice bit of local money. Which was salt. Yay, I guess.

I got a few more contacts, but none of them really had any neat stories attached. Just more innkeepers that were probably lining their pockets with money from reporting to dozens of people.

In case you're wondering, none of the taverns here had alcohol. They did, however, have various manners of getting yourself wasted. For cats, there was cat nip. For ponies, there were special salts. For dogs, there were some mild forms of chocolate, which apparently does something different in this world than it did in mine. For the naga, there was mercury. Nothing for me, though, and I wasn't about to tell people here how to make booze.

When we got back to the embassy, I reported to Emerald to tell her of my efforts with the spy net.

"I… understand, I suppose, why you would want to do this. But how do you think I'm going to pay for it?"

"Magic in some bits from Equestria. Most people here sell themselves cheap. When I'm gone, you inherit the network. Shouldn't be that hard to maintain, as long as the guards don't start arresting people that come by."

"You should have asked me, first, you know. I'm not certain I'm comfortable having cats from the lower city come here."

"He probably won't come often. Just make sure to read what they give you before you pay them. No reason to let them expect to be paid for dropping scraps of paper off that have nothing useful on them."

"I'm not an idiot, Nav. Why did you bring her with you?" with a significant glance at Kat.

"Hey, she got me my first contact. She knows this city better than I do, and was very helpful. Now that I know my way around better, I'll get people that the king won't find out about."

"You wound me," Kat said. "I'm on your side in this, Nav, not the king's. I remember old friends."

"I know that and you know that, lass, but my ambassador is properly learning paranoia."

I got a mean look from Emerald for that one.

"What?" I asked. "You're going to have a fun time back in Equestria, after this assignment. Trust me on that. At least you won't have combat reflexes drilled into you like I did. I almost stabbed Luna when she surprised me one day." A bit of an understatement, in more ways than one.

Emerald sighed. "I know, Nav. This place is not like Equestria at all. I'm still in shock that I was almost killed! Saved by you, thankfully. And I never did thank you for it… So thank you, Navarone. Thank you for saving my life."

"It's what I'm here for, lass. Well, one of the reasons I'm here. Tell me, what am I to be doing tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow, you are supposed to stay here all day. Don't be seen. The day after that, depending on how the ambush goes, we return to active duty."

"Good. Tomorrow is going to be boring, though. At least it'll give me a chance to heal a bit."

"Am I to be running any errands for you?" Kat asked with a bit of a hopeful lilt to her voice.

"No, Kat. If I'm dead and Navarone is here planning the return trip, what use will you be? I'm sure the king will find something for you to do."

Kat sighed at that. I was somewhat relieved. I wasn't lying about being happy to get a chance to heal a bit. Having her around to pester me would be a bit counterproductive.

I spent the next day looking around the embassy some more, avoiding open windows. I wasn't really expecting to find anything, I was just bloody bored. We didn't bring any books with us, as that would have been more weight through the desert. I spent a bit talking with the guards. For all looking the same, they had vastly different personalities. I gave and took advice from them. I asked them, academically, how they approached mares when off duty. Not for myself, mind, but because I kept getting bloody asked back home.

When I asked that question, I wasn't expecting the looks that came with it. I did my best to reassure the first one, a night guard: "I'm not asking for myself, man."

He looked at me. "We don't talk about it, but we know what happened between you and Princess Luna. I think you already know how to approach mares."

"That was a bloody accident. And look how that turned out anyway!"

"Still, I don't know if I should give you any advice on a matter like this."

"What's the worst that could happen?"

"You end up flying against the wall again like a broken ragdoll? Or worse yet, you end up banished from her presence or her eternal slave."

"See, I told Spike that could happen!"

"That doesn't happen often, mind," he warned. "You have to really piss her off or screw up badly."

"Well, this advice isn't for me anyway. I keep getting asked how to approach mares back home. I don't know why they're asking me, but they do."

"Asking you for advice? Hah! I can't even imagine you getting a human woman, scrawny as you are."

"Scrawny don't mean shit. Give me my weapons and enough time and I could take down any target."

"You couldn't take down Princess Celestia or Princess Luna if you tried."

"I wouldn't dare attack either, just because I don't know what effects it would have on this world. I'm positive I could kill them, but I wouldn't."

"You've obviously never seen them use magic, if you think you could kill them."

"I'm not stupid enough to attack her head on. Poison, a knife in the night, a shot from far away… I could bring them down. I just have no reason to."

"Sounds like you need to be taken down a peg or two. You forget that both are being guarded constantly."

"I could probably kill either, guards or not. I'd offer to do it as a training exercise, but we're both here, and they're half a world away. Besides, most of my strength comes from being stealthy. If the guards knew I was coming, it would be harder."

"You're very arrogant. I say you should ask the princess yourself if you can turn it into a training exercise. After all the trouble you've put some of the guards through, I'm sure they'd be happy to beat you down."

"After the whole Africa campaign, I'm pretty sure I've saved the guards more trouble than I gave them. But we digress. Do you have any advice for me or not?"

He rolled his eyes and told me pretty much what I was expecting to hear. I got similar answers from the other guards.

After a day of doing basically nothing, my wounds were feeling a hell of a lot better. I was still thinking the ones on my face would scar, though I was hoping it wouldn't be too noticeable. Either way, I could probably get the scars healed away. Hell, Luna's first healing removed most of mine.

Today was supposed to be the day the contact was taken. If he showed up, which I found myself doubting. More likely that it would be a trap, which was okay with me since none of my men were doing the attacking.

I went to talk to Emerald to see what our agenda for the day was. I found her fretting and pacing nervously in her room. "What's wrong, lass?"

"I'm just so nervous about this contact situation! If he isn't caught, when will the next attempt on my life come? Ponies aren't supposed to deal with stuff like this!"

"You shouldn't have to worry about another attack from that assassin group. Kat told me they won't accept two contracts on the same person. If you're really worried, you can ask the king to give us different accommodations, or more guards."

"I'd feel much better if I didn't know you were leaving soon. You're the only reason I'm still alive. Not like my guards did anything to stop that attack…"

"I'm sure the assassins would have been stopped before they got to you, lass. As it was, I don't think they were even there long when I found them. They were likely waiting for you to get back. The guards would have stopped them before they got to you. Besides, I thought you were still mad at me."

"I feel like I should be, but the princess and I both know that all you've done was done for the best. It's just hard to think that when you see the grisly results…"

"It's done and over with. What's on our agenda for today?"

"Laying low until the ambush party gets back with or without the contact. When they get back, we go to see the king."

"I feel I should let you know now, before it becomes a possible issue: The king wants my help with something. He didn't say what. I think he's going to try to bribe me to do whatever it is."

"Why would he think he can bribe you? What would he even try to bribe you with?"

"He probably still holds to the belief that I'm a mercenary, and that I'm in this business for money. I don't know why he would still be thinking that, but whatever. I might be able to use it to our advantage. It's not like I have to help him with whatever it is."

"Interesting… Keep me abreast of anything he asks you to do. If it won't endanger you or the mission, feel free to do whatever it is. At least one of us might as well come out of this endeavor a bit richer than before."

"I don't think salt will do me any good back home. Not like I really need money anyway, with both of the princesses looking out for me."

"I didn't figure you to be one for living off the kindness of another."

"I don't. I earn my pay doing stuff like this."

"Fair enough. So their money here is salt? Do they know ponies use that as a stimulant?"

"Yes, they do, and they think it's hilarious. That said, they'll also take bits if you have it. I wouldn't be surprised if their official system is bits and their unofficial is just salt, because it's so useful."

"I'll have to see about asking the king to set this place up on Equestria's gold standard. That would be one way for us to become closer, and to facilitate trade."

"That's none of my business. I want nothing to do with the economy."

"Lucky you. Sadly, I'm stuck doing all this work now. Alone. Since, you know, you killed my partner."

"Yeah, that's such a shame," I said wistfully, pretending to not catch the hint.

She harrumphed. "You know, I'm sure your human mind has all kinds of interesting ideas in it…"

"I've had people think that before, yes. And they are correct that it does."

"Any help you could give me would be… appreciated." Why the slight pause?

"I'll keep that in mind."

She waited for more, but got nothing. "We have a while before the ambush party is due back…"

I sighed. "Fine, if you really want to bloody know." I spent a while detailing how the American economy works. When it works, that is. I don't know how it's going now, but when I was stolen, everything was tanking.

When I finished, she just said, "Humans are crazy!" I couldn't disagree.

In the rest of the time we had left until the royal emissary came to get us, I decided to try to learn how to juggle. I don't know why.

I was failing rather badly at my efforts when a guard came by and told me to get ready to go.

"Any word on what the locals found?"

"Not that I was told," he answered.

I shrugged and grabbed my gear. There was no need to go about hiding who I was here, so I didn't bother with all the concealing clothing. Just grabbed my crossbow, a random quiver, a few knives, and went to find some news.

Kat was waiting for us all in the front lobby area.

"Well, lass, are we safe?" I asked.

"I'll wait to say until the ambassador is here."

"Little tease…" I couldn't read her, either. Ah well. Either way, I'd probably be gone soon enough.

Thankfully, Emerald didn't take long to get there. "Well, Kat, are we safe?" she asked.

"We didn't nab the contact, but we did wipe out an ambush. They weren't expecting the numbers we brought."

"Any losses?" I asked.

"None that were important. And we think we know the name of the cat responsible."

"It could just be a fake," I warned. "I wouldn't be too surprised if they were given a fake name when told who they were working for."

"Not likely. We caught the chief bodyguard of one of the biggest pro-slavery barons in Egypt. Soldiers are on the way to arrest the baron as we speak."

"I don't envy them. Anyone that can pay for assassins and wield a large enough army to risk men in an ambush probably has a large standing guard force paid to be well loyal. And he'll know someone is coming, if his men haven't reported back yet."

"That's why I'm here, instead of in the assault. Are you ready to go talk with the king?"

I nodded and Emerald said, "Lead the way."

I don't feel like describing local politics, and honestly, it isn't that important. So I'll just say that when the king got an excuse to take down a powerful baron that was basically opposing him, he very happily took it. Doing so greatly increased his own power, and it put all the other barons on their toes.

So the king was very happy to see us again. "Feeling well, Navarone?" he boomed as soon as we stepped in.

"Better than the other fellows, majesty," I answered.

"Quite. I don't suppose you'd want another crack at the fellow that did that to you? He's still alive, I think."

"I don't torture for pleasure. As far as I'm concerned, his usefulness is over and should be put down. No reason to leave him suffering."

"His usefulness to you is over. But he is still part of a guild of assassins that I am very interested in putting down."

"It is your kingdom, lord."

"Yes, it is. And I have you and your patron to thank for that. And I have you and your ambassador here to thank for helping me keep it. I won't forget that." I bowed my head in response. I mean, what was I supposed to say?

Thankfully, Emerald took over. I don't actually know what the hell she was trying to get from the guy. I mean, I know ambassadors do… stuff, I guess, but I've never really thought to care what.

And I didn't think to care now. I zoned out of their conversation rather quickly. I was supposed to be a guard anyway, so I figured I'd just sort of look around, pretending to watch for assassins or whatnot.

The throne room we were in was lavish, but thankfully not that garish. I think Rarity would have given it a grudging approval, though I'm sure she would have rushed to 'improve' most of it. There were no windows, which was a smart move. One official way out, though I was guessing there were hidden exits dotted about. The throne was wooden, engraved with all manner of scenes, all of which I later learned were pivotal points in the history of Egypt. I didn't see the revolution anywhere on there, though.

The king's guards were lazily watching us from the foot of the small dais the throne was on. Our guards were doing their best to watch everything without the impression of moving. They had almost failed once, and they weren't going to risk it happening again.

I was watching all this, so it came as a bit of a surprise when the conversation came to a close. "I don't suppose you'd mind if I talked to Navarone a bit, would you, ambassador?"

"He shouldn't have a hard time finding his way back. It wouldn't be his first time. You can borrow him for now. If I need him, I have a way of calling him." Like I'm a bloody pet. At least I had warned her beforehand. Now she wouldn't be concerned about it.

The ponies bowed their way out, pulling Kat along with them. I fixed my gaze on the king.

"So. Navarone. I don't suppose you'd be willing to take a little job on the side for me? It would pay well, I promise you."

"That depends on what the job is, lord."

"You question the job, rather than the pay? What manner of mercenary are you?"

I smiled at that. "I told you true when we met on the field east of the Suez. I am not a mercenary. I am an agent. However, if there is a job you need help with, I might be able to do it."

"Hmph. And how can I trust you'll settle the manner according to my needs instead of according to Celestia's needs?"

"I will not betray Equestria or Princess Celestia, and I will always put Celestia's interests above yours. I am if nothing else a loyal subject. If your job asks me to betray them, tell me so I can go back to the embassy now."

"No!" he said, too quickly. "No, human," said slower. "I need you. I do not think it will be a betrayal of Equestria or Celestia."

"Tell me your job, then. I'll decide myself."

"First, let me see that dagger at your waist."

I handed it over, with a raised eyebrow.

"As I thought… this is naga work, yes?"

I looked at it. That was one of the knives I got from the naga. The sword was stolen by the slaves. "Yes, lord."

He handed it back, and started to pace somewhat angrily. "There is a group of desert naga living under the Sphinx. I think they get their water from the Nile. I need their support, but they refuse to see any of my messengers, cat, dog, or pony. I don't have any dragons to ask for me, and naga mercenaries are so rare and I don't think I could find one willing to risk going down there. But with that dagger, you could get in."

"I did not know this dagger was like a key."

"Not quite like a key. But there is apparently a custom among naga: Anyone with a naga weapon is welcome into their caves, as long as they come in peace."

"Are naga weapons so rare that you'd need this thing?" I asked.

"Yes. Exceedingly rare. You must have broken into a naga cave to get that, or killed a naga from a main group that was migrating. They don't let those weapons get far from the main group."

"Glad I haven't lost it, then. What, exactly, do you want me to do?"

"Get in and ask them what I can do to buy their loyalty."

"And if their answer is negative?"

"Ask them what I can do to ensure they won't sell themselves out to an enemy."

"And if that answer is negative?"

"Come back to me. I might have you help me wipe out their nest, if that's the case."

"I won't fight under another foreign flag. But if I can draw you up a map I will."

He shrugged. "I have soldiers aplenty." I was tempted to smack him for saying that, but smacking a king is usually a bad idea.

"What is the pay?"

"Whatever you think your services are worth. Tell me what you want when you get back." Interesting.

"When do you want this done?"

"As soon as possible."

"I'll go change and do it right now, then. I'll bring an answer back as soon as I can."

"Why would you need to change?"

"The naga I met hate wings. I want mine to be hidden while I meet these."

"I will have to remember that. Go in peace, Navarone."

I stopped at the embassy long enough to change, warn Emerald where I was going to be, and grab Kat.

"Why do you need me to go?" Kat asked.

"So I don't get lost on the way to the Sphinx, and so I can find the entrance to the caverns they're living in." That, and I was planning on trying to fly back if I could, and with her there I could solve two obligations for the price of one.

It took us a few hours to walk through the city, and another hour to reach the Sphinx. It doesn't look like that long of a distance, but it's a lot longer when you're weaving through crowds and trying to find a direct route through the city.

Thankfully, the city guards still had a cordon around the Sphinx from the raid earlier, so getting in was no large problem. The guards were slightly hesitant to let us in, but when they saw my face and my wings they folded.

And I finally got my first close up look at the Sphinx. Body of a human male, bird-like wings, and head of a cat. Complete opposite of my world.

I asked Kat, "Why did the naga allow such a thing to be built over the entrance to their caverns?"

She looked at me, somewhat surprised. "The king didn't tell you? The naga commissioned the statue. It was built with slave labor. Nobody knows why they commissioned it or how they paid, or at least no one told any of us."

"As long as it isn't part of some ancient prophecy that I have to fulfill, I don't suppose it matters. I just want an answer." I started unwinding the bandage around my head. "No reason to go in there looking too injured…" I muttered.

"Do you want me to try to go in with you?" Kat asked.

"I don't think they'd let you in. If you want to wait here, I was planning on trying to fly back, if my wings were up to it. Or you could head on back, if you want."

She looked at me somewhat dubiously. "I don't think your wings can take two right now. I saw the damage in them better than you did. I'll see you back at the embassy."

I shrugged and went into the door on the side of the Sphinx. Despite it being winter out there, it was really bloody hot in the daylight. The freezing cold in the nights was an annoying contrast. I was really hoping this whole mess would be over quickly so I could get back to the city before night fell.

My eyes were starting to adjust to the darkness when I saw a few hulking shadows slink out of darkness of a larger connecting room. "What is your business here, creature?"

I slowly pulled the dagger out of its sheath and presented it to him, hilt first. He took it, and I said, "Shelter for a spell, if you'll have me. And a word with your leader, if possible."

"This is not a clan I've seen a symbol for. But it is definitely naga make. Where did you get this?"

"A clan of naga, around three hundred strong, around the middle of Equestria. It was payment for services rendered."

"You are no pony," he accused. I was about to answer when I heard and saw a striker in action as he lit a torch. I squinted in the bright glare. "You are also neither cat nor dog. What are you?"

"Human. Don't be surprised if you haven't heard of me."

His eyes narrowed. "Oh, I've heard of you. Human. Winged. Liberator. Monster." He handed the dagger back. "Friend of naga. Come." That could have gone worse.

I sheathed it and followed him into the murky shadows beyond the torch's flickering light.

As we walked, the naga said, "Remove the cover over your wings, human. Deception will give you nothing, here." I sighed and did as he said. I stretched them as far as I could, to try to relieve some of the cramps they get when hidden for so long. I could see the tips brushing against the walls of the hallway we were in. I was able to make out the naga stiffening and catching his breath when he realized what I was doing. These people really don't like wings…

We had to walk rather far before we started getting to natural caverns, and even farther before we found any signs of habitation. Around the time we hit the natural caverns, my boredom overcame my logic and I started asking questions. "Does your water come from the Nile?"

"Yes, but it goes through much cleaning before it gets to the main cavern. We control it using a system of floodgates and, when necessary, buckets. Not the most pleasant of jobs, but the water rarely needs to be changed, so it thankfully doesn't need to be done often. Where did water come from in the other cavern you visited?"

"I honestly don't know. I think it was a natural spring, but I didn't ask. I had other things on my mind at the time."

"That is likely. Most groups go after natural springs, to save themselves much effort. We just live here for the convenience of being near a large city."

"What do you get from the city?"

"News, food, jobs, any raw materials we can't make ourselves." If they get jobs from the city, why wouldn't they talk to any emissaries?

"In the other group, there were warriors stationed near the entrance. Large war bands, not just a few sentries. Do you not fear any attacks?"

"No one in these deserts would be stupid enough to attack any of us. And we know these tunnels better than anyone. One of us could hold an entire invading force back long enough for the other to get to the main cavern and alert all the fighters, and we could spread ourselves out in such a way that no one could get through without losing too many fighters. The only reason we would station a war band near the entrance is if we wanted to be able to attack outside us quickly, or scout for a new location to live."

"I suppose that's what the other group was doing. I helped them wipe out a hostile group of naga."

"What was their number?"

"The enemy numbered at least a hundred. Probably half of those were fighters. We had fifteen naga and me."

"And you killed them all?"

"All but one, yes."

"The naga in your land must be warriors out of legend!"

"It helps that I snuck into the enemy camp and killed about a quarter of them in their sleep, and then lit their camp on fire before fleeing."

"That is not the way of honor. But not all fights are about honor, I suppose."

"When I take on a job, I strive to finish the job. The best way of finishing a job is with the least amount of danger to me and the people I'm working with."

"I find it odd that those naga would have given you a weapon in exchange for a service like that."

"I also used torches to light their ceiling for them. Their main cavern had alcoves carved into the ceiling in the form of stars, and they had me place lit torches in each alcove. That was a long and exhausting job."

"I can imagine. Tell me, if you are a hero to the cat people and an agent for the ponies, why do you seek shelter here?"

"I've a question for your leader, if he'll see me."

"What is your question? Maybe I can answer it."

"Why won't your people respond to the emissaries the king sends?"

"We do. We just don't respond in a manner the king wishes to hear. We refuse to hire ourselves out to him, and have told each of his emissaries the same thing."

"Why won't you work for him?"

"Because we don't get involved in political struggles until it is clear who the winner will be. The king has a very rocky hold on power right now. If we decide to support him and he gets overthrown, we might be persecuted for helping him."

"Wise. But I have some information that might sway your opinion on the rockiness of the king's power."

"This must be rather new information. We keep agents in the city, and they report any wins or losses in the local power struggles."

"I'd be more comfortable speaking to a leader about this. But then, I think I am, aren't I?"

I was guessing that if I could see the naga I would see a smile on his face. "You aren't wrong, Navarone. What gave me away?"

"Most leaders wouldn't pull sentry duty. But most common soldiers wouldn't be able to discuss strategy and politics so openly. I suppose you had someone see me coming and came up using a shortcut to take the place of a sentry, so you could judge my mettle before I arrived in any dangerous position, where I might could hurt your people."

"Astute. What is your new information?"

"One bit is older, and you probably already know it. Which means you don't put as much weight on it as you should. Princess Celestia is supporting King Johnson."

"We knew this."

"The strongest pro-slave baron opposing the king is in the process of being arrested or killed by troops loyal to the king."

"That is happening right now?"

"It either has happened in the past few hours, will happen within the next few hours, or is happening right now. I don't know exactly. There was a skirmish outside the Sphinx today, and that gave us the evidence we needed to bring down the baron."

"That is, indeed, pivotal news. If it is true."

"When you learn that it is true, would you send someone to talk with the king, and tell him you are willing to discuss working with him?"

"Yes. We should learn the truth of this matter within seven surface cycles. Days, I believe you call them. If we learn it to be true, and the raid is successful, we shall send word to the king."

"Cool. I don't suppose there's an exit from these caves near or inside the city?"

"There is. But I think there are some matters for you and our elder to discuss."

"Why?"

"I do not know. But you are the closest thing we have ever seen matching the description that was passed down. I would be a fool to let you leave without talking to the elder."

"If you're going to try to make me pass some ridiculous rites of passage, would you be overly upset if I left?"

"I wouldn't care one whit. The elder would, though, and that means most of the naga here would, so I don't think that would end well."
The situations I find myself in…

The caverns here didn't have any nice sites like the burial chamber or the sapphire chamber, but their main cavern was still a sight to see. There weren't fish in it, though, and I don't think there was any way for the ceiling to be lit up. So it was just a massive, dark chamber with a few circles of light weakly fighting back the encroaching darkness. The leader fellow I was talking with called up a guard to watch me while he went to find the elder.

It took about ten minutes. As soon as the elder got out of the water and got a good look at me, he smacked the younger leader on the back of the head. "Does that look like a cat to you?"

The young guy was rubbing the back of his head and staring daggers at the elder. "You're the one that asked for any leads! This is the closest we've gotten to anything approaching the description. I figured you could ask him some questions or something."

The old one tried to mutter under his breath, but since he was old and bad of hearing it was clearly audible: "Stupid youngsters, bringing ugly fliers down here…" In a louder voice, he said, "Fine! What are you supposed to be, you ugly mutant?"

"I'm supposed to be respectful and kind, but sometimes I change my mind about that."

The young guy was smiling, the guard that was still watching me was glaring at me and making a point of rearranging his weapons, and the old one seemed taken aback for a minute before coughing a laugh and saying, "Oh, you wanna be like that, huh?"

"I would like to be kind and respectful, but if you keep up that attitude I'll change my mind. I don't care how old you are, I'm not above smacking some respect into you."

The guard behind me unsheathed his very long sword. The young leader did the same, with a warning to the guard, "He's a guest, with naga steel to back him up."

"He is threatening our elder!" was the retort.

"As far as I'm concerned, the elder deserves it. And I control what guest lives and dies here." The guard lowered his weapon, but didn't put it away until the elder waved him down.

"Fire in you," the elder said. "Good. Don't think that makes you the chosen one."

"Fuck that, I don't want to be the chosen one. Chosen ones have to risk their lives doing things for people that are too inadequate to do it for themselves, and rarely gain anything of note but pain for their troubles."

"Well, you don't match the description anyway…" the elder said. "That scratch on your face. Where did you get it?"

"An assassin. A male cat assassin, so don't get any ideas in your head."

"Hm. Fine. You aren't the one we're looking for." I put my shirt back on while he continued. "However, you are close. I don't suppose you'd be willing to go through some of the trials, as a test run?"

"I would not be. In fact, it possible, I'd kind of like to leave."

"There'd be no danger to you involved. Just a bit of flying."

"My wing was recently injured. I haven't tried flying yet. I might or might not be able to fly at all right now."

"Then all the better to try now, in a safe environment!"

I looked to the young leader, "Can he stop me from leaving?"

"He can make it very difficult."

I sighed. "Fine. Tell me what you want me to do and I'll bloody do it. And then I'll leave."

"Great! Fly to all the lit up points in the room and come back here."

"That's all? Are there any obstacles between the points, or is it all open space?"

He looked down at that and mumbled something. "What was that? I didn't quite catch it," I said.

"He said to watch out for stalactites and stalagmites," the young guy said. "There aren't many, but there are a few." The elder glared at him. "What? You already said he isn't the chosen one. No reason for him to risk cracking his skull if he can't see in the dark."

"Damn right. Cats can see in the dark. I can't," I said.

All three of them looked at me like I was an idiot. "You… you can't see in the dark?" the elder stammered.

"Why would you come into a cavern if you can't see in the dark?" the young guy asked.

"No, I can't see in the dark. And I came here because I was asked to."

"Are you sure he isn't the chosen one?" the guard asked the elder.

"I hope not! This guy's an idiot!" he responded, still looking at me like I just said I forgot how to breathe.

"So… you still want me to fly?"

"Let's just… let's just go, human. I'll lead you to an exit near the city," the young guy tried.

The elder stopped him. "No. I want to see him try it."

"I'll take it nice and slow. Don't want to risk hurting my wings anyway. If I run into anything, it shouldn't hurt that much."

"Your funeral…" the guard muttered.

I did fine. A few close calls, and my wing started to ache a bit near the end, but I made it. I got a lot of looks, and there was a small crowd around the elder when I got back. I did my best to load the crossbow in the air, just in case, and then landed.

"I made it. Your test is fine, old man. Now, where's the exit?"

"What would you do..." he started, and I pointed the crossbow right at him, "…if I said you were the chosen one?"

"If you have someone behind me knock me out my finger will pull this trigger and you'll die. I'm not your chosen one. I don't care what you need a chosen one for. I don't care what kind of great evil you're fighting. I don't care what the rewards are. I don't care if you'll threaten to kill me. Where's the exit?"

"Just asking. Show him out," he said to the young guy. He nodded, and began pushing through the crowd. I jumped back into the air and flew over the group of naga in the direction he was heading, crossbow still aimed at the elder.

When he got to me, the fellow said, "Wise. But he was just joking."

"I'm not unloading this thing until I'm back in the city, and I'm not going to stop pointing it at a naga until I'm out of these caves. I refuse to be used by another group of people for a goal that I care nothing about. Four is enough for me."

"Four?"

"Princess Celestia, the slaves, King Johnson, and the naga back in Equestria."

"If all those have you pursuing goals you don't care about, what do you care about?"

"Getting back home to my friends and living in peace. My adoptive home, rather, not my original home. That is now beyond me."

"It is good to be among friends, yes. But don't you ever feel the need to serve a cause bigger than yourself?"

"Yes, but I manage to remind myself that most people that dedicate themselves to causes get used up by that cause before too much progress is made. And if you think I willingly went along with any of their requests for help, you're only partially correct. I was captured by the naga and my choice was basically endure captivity until the naga that captured me won out over the invaders, or help the naga deal with their enemies. I refuse to be a captive, or bound forcefully to one place for too long. Princess Celestia blackmailed me. The slaves held a knife to the throat of a friend. And serving the king is an extension of serving Princess Celestia. I just want to live in peace, but here I am, covered in weapons, threatening the life of someone that doesn't deserve to die just so that I won't risk my freedom again."

"You are welcome to stay with us, you know. You may not be our chosen one, but you could help us plan for him. Or her. It would take more manpower than anyone would risk to come and get you."

"It wouldn't take any manpower to get me. Princess Celestia could pluck me from the air with her magic. And then I'd be stuck with one very pissed off employer, with no defense and completely at her mercy."

He looked rather alarmed at that. "She can use magic to take anyone at any time?"

"No, just a few people she's attuned to. She is attuned to me. That has saved my life in the past, so it isn't all bad. Though, to be fair, it was her fault I was in any danger at all."

"Does she automatically know when you are in danger?"

"I don't know how it works. She never explained it. I know she can eavesdrop when she wants, though."

He looked alarmed at that, too. "Aren't you worried she'll hear you talking about her?"

"She's the immortal princess of over half the planet. Surely she has something more important to do than listen to me all day." Probably. "And if you are listening, I want it known that this is all said under duress," said with a smile.

The naga smiled, and said, "Quiet, you! Get back to telling us how much you hate your life!"

"Well, a few years ago I was kidnapped from my home plane and forced to live in a fairytale world where ponies and buffalo could talk, cat people and dog people existed, and naga lived in caves. Ever since then life has just had so many twists and turns that I don't know what to do with myself. I accidentally caused someone to fall in love with me, I've been forced to change my shape, I grew wings, and I've had taken from me something that should only ever be freely given on more than one occasion."

"You sound like you need a break."

"I get a few. And then something else comes up. I just can't win. I keep waiting for the spring, but I fear I'm lost too deep in winter to have much hope for the coming warmth."

"Just remember that all seasons turn eventually."

"That doesn't do me any good if I don't survive long enough for that."

"True enough, human. This here is your stop."

We arrived at a ladder leading up to a trap door. "There's no way you have a trap door in the middle of the sandy plain between the city and the Sphinx."

"This leads to a back alley near the edge of the city. Thieves have learned to avoid this particular alley, so don't worry about getting attacked right outside."

"Thanks, mate. And good luck with your chosen one, whatever you need him for."

He rolled his eyes. "I could care less about it. Until I saw you, I thought the elder was a complete nut case. My attitude on that matter is the same as yours: Chosen ones are for those that can't deal with their own problems. Good luck on the surface. Tell the king he'll have his answer soon."

I nodded and climbed my way out.