"So, what now sir?" Dale asked.

"The hell do I know?" Cotton sighed. "Who do you want to visit? Cuz I don't really care..."

"How 'bout Rainbow Dash!" Dale exclaimed with a smile. "She's my favorite pony!"

Cotton rolled his eyes. "Fine. We just have to find that rainbow-haired gal somewhere."

Kahn pointed to a flying rainbow-mane blue Pegasus. "Is that her?"

Dale smiled widely and vigorously nodded. "Yes! YES! YES!-!-!"

Cotton sighed again. "Hey Dasher!" He shouted to Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow Dash landed in front of Cotton.

"Hey Cotton. What's up?" she asked Cotton.

"I need you to do me a favor." Cotton said. "My friends just arrived in Ponyville. They need a place to stay."

Rainbow Dash shrugged. "OK. Take who?"

Cotton turned around to pick who should stay with Rainbow Dash.

Bill was busy scratching his belly.

Dale jumped up and down whispering "Pick me! Pick me!"

Boomhauer just nodded and said, "Yo," which made Rainbow Dash blush a tiny bit.

Kahn just yawned and gave a little glare to Rainbow Dash, who gave a glare tight back at him.

Cotton shrugged. "Gribble."

Dale flew up to the sky with a victorious grin. "YESSS!"

Rainbow Dash giggled a bit.

Cotton rolled his eyes. "Alright, another problem solved. Come on Fatty, Boomhauer, and Mr. Kahn."

As they left, it was just Rainbow Dash and Dale.

Dale smiled. "Got any cigarettes?"

Rainbow Dash tilted her head. "A what?"

Dale just smiled. His left eye was twitching a bit.

"Oh right..." He thought. "There are no cigarettes here..."

---

"Alrighty." Cotton said. "Let's go visit...uh..."

"Visit who?" Bill asked.

"HI COTTON!" Pinkie Pie shouted as she suddenly appeared in front of Cotton.

"GAH!" Cotton gasped. "Jesus, Pinks. You almost gave me a heart attack."

Pinkie smiled innocently. "Oops!"

Cotton then raised an eyebrow and said, "Hey Pinky, ya like new guests, right?"

Pinkie nodded happily. Cotton smirked, "Well mah friends need a place to stay, ya mind if..."

Pinkie laughed. "Oh sure! I'll take one in! Which one?"

Cotton turned around to pick who should stay with Pinkie Pie.

Boomhauer just let out a confused look at Pinkie Pie.

Kahn just yawned and looked around, bored out of his mind.

Bill just blinked at Pinkie Pie.

"FATTY!" Cotton barked.

Bill stood up straight and saluted. "SIR, YES, SIR!" he shouted.

Cotton smirked and slowly pointed to Pinkie Pie. "Say howdy to yer new roommate..." he said.

Bill looked nervous as the party pony let out a huge grin. Nevertheless, he continued to salute and shouted, "HOWDY, NEW ROOMMATE!"

Pinkie giggled as Cotton shouted, "Alright Boomhauer and Mr. Kahn! Move out!"

Cotton left with Boomhauer and Kahn, leaving just Bill and Pinkie Pie.

Bill just stared at Pinkie Pie, who just smiled at him.

Bill's stomach started to growl.

As soon as she heard his stomach, she immediately took out a chocolate cupcake.

"Here you go!" She said, handing the cupcake to Bill.

Bill just dropped his jaw.

"I think I'm gonna like it here..." He thought as he ate the cupcake in one bite.

---

"And that is my 14th compelling reason on why you should switch to propane!" Hank said as Spike yawned while Twilight was very impressed.

"Wow!" Twilight exclaimed. "You know so much about propane!"

"Yup." Hank said with a smirk.

"I'm definitely going to switch to propane!" she said. "On one condition."

Hank crossed his arms. "And that will be?"

Twilight smirked. "You set it up."

Hank just let out a victorious smirk.

---

Mark formed another cloud and shaped it to look like Joshua Ziff.

Joshua was friendly like Jacob, though he sometimes got angry. Nevertheless, he had a good heart.

Mark facepalmed with both of his hooves.

"Why..." He said. "WHY!-!-!" he shouted as tears came out of his eyes and stained his hooves.

---

"So he's alive?"

"Yeah...he really is."

"This bores me. Can we do what you promised?"

"We don't have to do this, ya know?"

"Cool your jets, you two. You two will get what you want...just like me and my friend will get what we want..."

Ugh. I'm such a lazy writer.

As usual, my apologies.

READ AND REVIEW!

"I tell you what sir, man, where in goddang we going, man?" Boomhauer blurted out.

Cotton sighed. "I ask myself the same question, Boomhauer..."

"Hello Cotton!" Rarity shouted.

Cotton looked at Rarity and waved, "Hey."

Rarity walked up and smiled. "Oh. Are these your friends?" she asked, looking at Boomhauer and Kahn.

Cotton nodded. "Yeah...they need a place to stay. Wanna take one in?"

Rarity looked at Kahn and Boomhauer.

Kahn just stared back with a blank face.

Boomhauer, however, just nodded and smiled. "Yo."

Rarity let out a tiny blush and asked him, "Oh...um...and you are?"

"Dang old Jeff man. Canadians called me that, I tell you what. But, um, Boomhauer is what they dang old call me, just dang don't call me egghead or something yo." Boomhauer replied.

Rarity just stood there with a confused look.

Cotton chuckled. "He's Boomhauer."

Rarity slowly tilted her head. "Oh...um...nice to meet you."

Cotton smirked. "C'mon Mr. Kahn. Let's leave these two lovebirds alone."

As Cotton and Kahn left, Boomhauer and Rarity blushed as Cotton said that statement.

Boomhauer just scratched his head. "Yo." he muttered.

---

"So what now, Cotton?" Kahn asked.

Cotton smirked. "I'm taking you to yer new roommate, Mr. Kahn." he said as he took Kahn to Fluttershy's cottage.

When they arrived, Cotton knocked on the door. Fluttershy came to the front door and opened it.

She smiled weakly. "Oh. Um. Hi Cotton." she whispered.

She looked at Kahn. "Oh. Um. Hello."

Kahn looked at Fluttershy and raised an eyebrow. "Hi." He said in a friendly tone.

Cotton chuckled. "Hey Flutters. Ya mind taking my friend Kahn Souphanousinphone?"

Fluttershy looked surprised. "Um...well...uh..."

Cotton smiled. "Great! Have a nice day you two!"

As Cotton left, it was just Fluttershy and Kahn.

Kahn scratched his head. Fluttershy just stood there.

A small white bunny came and poked Fluttershy's leg and pointed at Kahn.

Fluttershy smiled. "Oh, Angel. This is my friend Kahn Super-Phone."

"Souphanousinphone" Kahn corrected.

Angel just glared at Kahn and shook his head.

Kahn glared at Angel. "I just met this bunny" Kahn thought. "And already I hate it."

---

Hank was sweating profusely as he installed the propane heater in Twilight's house.

"I never thought it would be so different than it was on Earth. It feels so wierd." he said to himself. "If I can just...get it...to...ugh...argh...BWAAH!-!-!"

Hank shouted, while sweating large beads of sweat, as he finished the final touches on the heater.

Hank smiled as it worked perfectly. "Yes! Yes, I did it!" he said while laughing like a madman.

---

Dale was grinning as Rainbow Dash introduced him to her home.

"And yeah, this's my home. Any questions?" She asked Dale.

Dale shook his head. "Nope!"

Rainbow Dash smiled. "Oh...OK. Cool. Oh by the way, you didn't ask my question earlier. What's a cigarette?"

Dale's smile quickly turned into a small frown.

"Oh it's something...you know what? Forget about it." he said as he let out a nervous smile.

Rainbow Dash let out a raised eyebrow but decided to forget about it.

---

Bill happily shoves cupcakes in his face.

Pinkie Pie giggled as he ate cupcakes like a pig.

"Oh my gosh! You're so funny!" she said with a smile.

Bill just shrugged while eating. "Thanks. I guess."

"So you're a barber?" Pinkie asked Bill. "That's cool! Can you demostrate?"

Bill froze. Cutting hair for humans was one thing. But can he cut pony hair?

He grinned nervously. "Um...I'm gonna need some scissors. But I don't have any, so maybe another tim..."

"Here you go!" Pinkie said as she handed a pair of scissors to Bill.

Bill started to sweat a bit. "Ah damn." he whispered.

---

Mark formed two clouds and shaped them both to look like two of his friends, Alexander Dean and Andrew Devin.

Andrew was a kind teenager. However whenever he is insulted, most of the time he will get too defensive. Alexander was the same thing, however, sometimes he can be a little mean. Despite that, both Andrew and Alexander were good teenagers.

Mark started to shake and rocked back and forth. He tried to forget the memories as hard as he could.

DUDE PLEASE STOP!-!-!-!-! STOP STOP STOP...

OH GOD! PLEASE NO!-!-!-!-! NO NO NO NO...

NO!-!-!-! STOP!-!-!-!-! PLEASE!-!-!-!-!-!-! I'M YOUR FRIEND!-!-!-!-!-!-! FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND...

He closed his eyes as hard as he could. Tears forming from his eyes.

STOP STOP STOP...

NO NO NO NO...

FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND...

He gritted his teeth as hard as he could. Small whimpers came out of his mouth.

STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP...

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO...

FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND FRIE...

All of a sudden, he stopped. He opened his eyes and relaxed his face. He slowly got up with a completely blank face and flew to home.

---

"What!-? He's alive?"

"You know him?"

"It's a long story..."

"So what now?"

"Something I've always wanted to do..."

Cotton decided that, since he hadn't talked to Mark, he should visit him.

"Excuse me lady." He asked a random mare in the street. "Ya know how I can get to...uh..Mar...I mean Midway's house"

"Just around the block." the mare responded.

Cotton then headed towards the direction the mare pointed.

He stopped in front of a red brick house.

He noticed a mailbox that was labeled "Midway"

"Yeah," Cotton said. "This's Mark's place."

He walked up to the front door.

Just when he was about to knock, he heard a small stool fall to the ground inside.

Curious, Cotton walked around the house to find the source of the sound.

When he walked up to a window, he was horrified at what he saw.

Mark was there hanging in a noose, tied to a ceiling fan.

"Oh shi..." Cotton muttered.

Cotton immediately rammed to the window, shattering it.

Then he picked up a sharp piece of the window and threw it to the noose rope, cutting it.

Mark then fell to the ground, coughing violently.

Cotton ran to Mark. "Jesus Christ! Mark! What the hell is wrong with you?-!"

Mark just sobbed and coughed. "I killed them..." he groaned.

Cotton just dropped his jaw. "What?" He whispered.

Mark just muttered. "I'm sorry Alex, Andrew, Jacob, Joshua..." he said before passing out.

"Mark!" Cotton shouted as he shook Mark. "DON'T YOU DIE ON ME, SOLDIER!"

---

Three days ago

Mark then woke up.

He noticed that he was in a hospital bed.

He lifted up his arm and noticed two IV tubes on his arm.

He placed a hoof on his face and felt a respirator tube on his nose.

"I'm alive...?" he whispered.

"Yeah. You are."

Mark slowly turned his head and saw a smirking Cotton, who had his arms crossed.

"Took you three days to wake up. You was always the soldier youse was at the WWII." Cotton said before his smirk became a frown. "Now then. Mind telling me why you were hanging on a fan?"

Mark just stared at Cotton before rapidly reaching to the cord of his life support.

Cotton quickly grabbed Mark's hoof and shook his head. "Pulling the plug?" he said with a raised eyebrow. "I don't think so."

Mark glared at Cotton. However, it slowly turned from a glare to a pained, sad face.

Immediately, he broke into tears. He put both of his hooves on his face.

Cotton sighed. "Just tell it to me Mark. Ain't nobody here but us two."

Mark slowly stopped crying and, in a sad tone, explained the whole thing.

Cotton just widen his eyes.

Mark just gasped. "I can't take it anymore, Cotton." he said. "I just want to end it...I just...want to...die..."

Cotton placed a hoof on Mark's shoulder. "Don't you dare say that, soldier." he said with a serious tone. "Sure, you killed some people. But, the reason why you'll like this is because you never forgave yerself for this. When I met you, here on this stupid horse world, you were happy. You had some good friends, a house, a life, every-goddamn-thing. And now yer gonna throw all that away. Let me ask you something. Suppose ya did kill yerself. What about that cross-eyed pony? What about those six horse friends? What about all of your friends? What about the life you have that's a million times better than what you had on Earth? Are you willing to throw all that just because you couldn't forgave yerself for the death of yer friends? Are you willing to let them feel the same way you did when you killed yer friends? Are you willing to kill yourself?"

Mark just stared at Cotton, dried tears were under his eyes.

Cotton took out a shard of glass he got from three days ago at Mark's house.

He placed it on Mark's hoof.

"Remember, soldier." Cotton said. "I don't know the right or wrong answers. It's all you. You pick yes, use that shard. You pick no, throw it away."

He turned away and crossed his arms, letting out a serious look on his face.

Mark looked at Cotton, who was still standing.

He then looked at the shard, seeing his reflection.

As Cotton looked away, he heard a noise.

A noise he knew he would hear.

A glass shard shattering.

He turned around and saw the glass pieces on the floor and Mark, who gave Cotton a small smile.

Mark saluted Cotton. "Thank you, Colonel."

Cotton saluted back to Mark. "Much obliged, soldier."

"Mark!"

Cotton turned around and saw the pony whom he believed was Derpy Hooves.

She ran to Mark and gave him a hug. "I was so worried for you!" she said as she shed tears on his shoulder.

Mark hugged Derpy tightly. "I'm so sorry Derpy..."

Cotton let out a smile as he left the room, leaving only Mark and Derpy.

As Cotton left the hospital, he realized something.

He felt that he did something good.

Sure, he did SOME good back on Earth, but for some reason, it was different this time.

Cotton just shook his head. "God said I would redeem myself here...He...I...NO!...No?" he said to himself.

He just sighed and muttered, "Crap..." as he went back to Sweet Apple Acres.

5 days later

"Huh..." a blue husky unicorn muttered as he ruffled his yellow mane. Next to him was a light green unicorn with a brown mane and glasses.

"So we live in Equest-something..." the light green unicorn said. A young red bloodhound dog stood next to the light green unicorn.

"Equestria, sug." a pegasus corrected. She had a long blond mane and was pink-skinned. Standing next to her was a brown pegasus with a black mane. Another standing next to the pink pegasus was a pegasus who looked like the other brown pegasus, but more older and had a longer mane.

"Ugh...Nothing but a bunch of ponies and ponies..." a unicorn muttered. She was light brown and had a black mane. She was right next to a younger unicorn, who had light brown skin and black hair.

"I think it looks pretty." a green pegasus said, curling her blond hair. A tan Earth pony with crooked teeth and a tan mane placed a hoof on the green pegasus's shoulder. Standing next to the tan Earth pony was a filly who looked like the green pegasus.

"I think it looks a little too pretty." an army green Earth pony colt muttered, putting a hoof on his brown mane. He stood next to a unicorn, who had red skin and a yellow mane.

"Settle down, Ol' Top." a gray pegasus, with a gray mane, told the colt. Right next to him was an light blue Earth pony with a gray mane and glasses.

"Yes. Ever since your world ended, I asked your god to send you here." Princess Celestia told the ponies.

"Oh man oh man oh man." the blue unicorn muttered. "First we woke up here, freaked out when we were ponies, came to Cannerlot..."

"Canterlot." Celestia corrected.

"Yeah...then got freaked out by the ponies, and got sent by guards to come here and let us know what's going on...I said it once and I'll say it again: Please let me wake up."

"I'm afraid it's no dream, Robert Hill, or Bobby." Celestia said with a frown.

The unicorn, Robert Hill or more commonly known as Bobby, just dropped his jaw. "Wha...I never told you my name! How did you know my name...?!"

The light green unicorn looked surprised. "Can she read our thoughts?" she thought.

"No, I can't read your thoughts, Margaret Hill, I mean, Peggy." Celestia said with a smile.

The unicorn, Peggy, just gasped.

"I know who all of you are." Celestia said.

She pointed to the pink pegasus, the brown pegasus, and the older brown pegasus.

"You are Nancy-Hicks Gribble, along with your son Joseph Gribble, and your 'acquaintance,' John Redcorn."

She pointed to the green pegasus, the filly pegasus, and the tan Earth pony.

"You are Luanne Leanne Platter, along with your daughter Gracie and your husband Elroy 'Lucky' Kleinschmidt."

She pointed to the light brown unicorn and the younger light brown unicorn.

"You are Minh Souphanousinphone and your daughter, Connie, or Kahn Jr."

She pointed to the red unicorn and the army green colt.

"You are Didi Hill and your son, G.H., or Good Hank."

Lastly, she pointed to the gray pegasus, light blue Earth pony, and the bloodhound.

"You are Buck Strickland, Tillie Hill, and Ladybird."

Minh just shook her head in disbelief.

"How on earth..." G.H. whispered.

Celestia smirked. "As I told Cotton Hill, my secret."

When she mentioned Cotton's name, Peggy blinked.

"Cotton Hill?-! The same Cotton Hill..."

"...who killed fifty men? That's him."

The ponies turned around and saw an alicorn with an indigo body and a teal mane and tail.

"Hello Luna." Celestia said with a smile.

"Hello sister." Luna replied back with a smile. "I see you're introducing these ponies to Equestria."

Celestia nodded. Bobby raised his hoof.

"How do you know about Grandpa?" he asked. "And who's the dark purple princess?"

"This is my sister, Princess Luna." Celestia answered. "And as for your grandpa, when he died, your god wanted Cotton to redeem himself. So, with my permission, I allowed Cotton to be in this world. I figured he shouldn't be lonely, so I asked your god to bring Hank, Dale, Bill, Boomhauer, and Kahn here when the world ended."

"Dad's here?-!-?-!" Bobby shouted.

Celestia smiled. "Absolutely. Once again, I didn't want them to be lonely either, so I had every one of you come to Equestria. I will have a train ride ready for you so that you can meet them."

Peggy just stood there, her jaw dropped to the ground.

Buck just chuckled. "Looks like my assistant manger's still alive."

John Redcorn just sighed. "I just can't believe all this."

G.H. just stood there with a confused look. "Dad's...alive?"

"Thank you, Princess Celestia and Luna." Luanne said with a grateful smile.

"You're welcome Mrs. Platter." Celestia said with a smile. "Princess Luna will lead you to your train ride."

As Luna and the ponies left, Celestia took out a letter and began writing.

Dear Twilight,
Please let Cotton know that there will be some new ponies arriving. Also notify him to go to the train station to meet them. He may bring his friends that just arrived. You may also bring some of your friends.

Sincerely,
Princess Celestia

---

Twilight finished the letter. "How did she know that Cotton's friends arrived?" she said to herself.

Spike finished his bath and exited out of the bathroom, with a robe and a relaxed look on his face. "Now I feel really silly for not switching to propane in the first place."

Twilight smiled. "Yeah. I know. Thank Celestia for Hank. Oh, and Spike? Please tell Hank that all of us need to go to the train station. I got to go tell the girls and Cotton's friends."

---

Cotton was busy bucking trees.

Once again, he felt glad he had his shins.

Shins, Mark, a nice town. He actually liked it here.

However, he still refused to thank God for all this. He knew the main reason he was brought he was to redeem himself. Something Cotton did not want to do.

"Hey Cotton!" Applejack shouted.

"Yeah?" Cotton shouted back.

"Get ready! We're going to the train station!" She yelled.

"Why?-!" He yelled.

"I dunno! Twilight said that the princess said you should be there!" She shouted.

"That princess whore?" he said to himself.

"Alright!" He shouted.

---

Cotton looked bored as he stood there with Applejack.

"Ah'm bored." Cotton muttered to himself.

"Hey Cotton!"

Cotton turned around and smirked as he saw Mark.

"Hello Mark!" Cotton shouted. "Got out of the hospital?"

"Yeah." Mark said with a grateful smile. "Thanks again."

Cotton just smiled. "Don't mention it."

"Hello Colonel, sir!" Bill shouted as he walked to the train station with Pinkie Pie.

"Hello Fatty!" Cotton said with a salute.

"Fatty? Oh right. Bill." Mark said to himself.

Bill also saluted Mark. Mark smirked and saluted back.

"Hello sir!" Dale shouted as he walked with Rainbow Dash.

"Gribble!" Cotton shouted as he waved.

"So that's that the conspiracy guy..." Mark said to himself.

He noticed Kahn walking with Fluttershy.

"Hello Mr. Kahn!" Cotton said with a smirk.

Kahn just waved.

Mark frowned. "That Laotian guy..." he muttered while shaking his head.

"Yo!" Boomhauer shouted as he was walking with Rarity.

Cotton just waved. Mark did the same.

"I'll never know what that crazy bastard is saying, I tell you what." Mark muttered.

Hank walked with Twilight. Cotton just grunted.

"Hello Hank..." Cotton muttered.

"Hey, dad." Hank said.

"So what are we all doing here again?" Cotton said as he threw his arms in the air.

"Princess Celestia said we should be here because she has a surprise for us." Twilight responded.

"Waste of time." Cotton blurted out with a yawn.

---

Just then, the train arrived. As the doors opened, ponies came out of it.

Bobby got up and yawned.

"Well Ol' Top." Buck muttered. "We're here."

"Be sure to say hi to Hank, Gracie!" Luanne said as she patted Gracie's head.

"Yes mama." Gracie said with a smile.

G.H. just stood there, with a blank face. "I actually get to meet dad..."

Peggy patted Ladybird's head. Minh and Connie just sighed.

"Well, let's get out of the train." Nancy said.

As Cotton and Hank's friends waited, Peggy, Bobby, and Ladybird came out of the train.

Hank raised an eyebrow. "Wait a minute. They look familiar."

Peggy and Bobby recognized that voice. They both gasped.

"Hank?" Peggy whispered. "Dad?" Bobby said.

Hank widen his eyes. "Oh my God..."

Cotton dropped his jaw. "Bobby? Hank's wife?"

Ladybird came up to Hank and started to sniff his leg. She then sat down and barked.

"Ladybird?" Hank whispered. "Why...you're so young..." he said with tears.

Nancy, Joseph, and John Redcorn came out of the train.

"Is that you Hank?" Nancy said.

Dale gasped. "Nancy?"

Joseph and John Redcorn looked surprised.

"Dad?" Joseph said. "Dale?" Redcorn said.

Dale just stood there with a shocked face.

Minh and Connie came out of the train.

"That you Gribble?" Minh said with a surprised tone.

"Minh?-!" Kahn shouted.

"Dad?-!" Connie shouted. Kahn just stammered.

Luanne, Lucky, and Gracie came out of the train.

"Uncle Hank?" Luanne said.

Hank was pretty surprised to see Luanne.

"Hello Hank." Lucky said as he waved at Hank. "Come on dear. Say hi." he said to Gracie.

"Hi..." Gracie said in a shy voice.

"Lucky? Gracie?" Hank said in a surprised tone.

Tilly, and Buck came out of the train.

"Hey Ol' Top!" Buck said with a smile. "Hello dear." Tilly said with a smile.

"Mom?-! Sir?-!" Hank said as he almost had a heart attack.

G.H. and Didi came out of the train.

"Hello Hank." Didi said.

"Didi?-!" Cotton yelled.

G.H. walked up to him.

"Dad?" G.H. whispered.

Cotton looked down at G.H. "Dad?" Cotton said with a confused look.

Didi walked up to G.H. "It's your son, Good Hank."

Cotton gasped as he looked down at G.H.

"Jesus! You've grown!" Cotton said with a surprised tone.

G.H. just glared at Cotton.

Then, immediately, he quickly jumped on top of Cotton and hugged Cotton's neck, small tears coming out of his closed eyes.

Cotton smiled and hugged G.H. back. G.H. was his favorite son.

"Awww..." Gracie said with a happy smile.

G.H. immediately opened his eyes and jumped off Cotton.

"Ya never saw that OK?" he said, pointing at Gracie.

Gracie just crossed her arms and let out a cocky grin. Everypony started to chuckle.

Mark let out a surprised grin to see this reunion.

Cotton just sighed. "Oh God." he muttered. "Thanks for being Good Hank here, but you had to bring Hank's wife..."

READ AND REVIEW!

Bobby, Peggy, and Tilly were hugging Hank, much to his dismay. Buck gave him a proud smile.

Nancy and Joseph were hugging Dale. John Redcorn let out a smile as Dale cried a bit from joy.

Minh and Connie were also hugging Kahn. Despite the fact that he doesn't like hugging that much, he was crying with joy.

When Bobby, Peggy, and Tilly were finished hugging Hank, Luanne, Lucky, and Gracie ran up to Hank and gave him a great hug, making Hank grit his teeth and his face red.

Cotton just looked at Didi, but didn't hug her. However, he was hugging G.H.

Even though G.H. didn't spend much time with Cotton, he loved his father, though he thought that his father was a bit annoying and a little rude. He was honestly getting tired of him bragging that he killed fifty men.

"Oh I forgot, which one of you is Midway?" Peggy asked.

Mark raised his hoof.

Peggy said, "Before we got on this train, this Princess Luna told me to say that she said hi to you."

Mark blushed. "She did?" He said softly with a small smile.

Cotton noticed this and shook his head with a smile.

"Oh god..." Cotton muttered.

Ladybird came up to Twilight and started to sniff her leg.

"Looks like she's taking an interest in you." Applejack said to Twilight with an amused smile.

"Excuse me." Cotton said as he walked towards Mark.

"Hey Mark?" Cotton asked Mark.

"Yeah?" Mark replied.

"Ya like that Princess Luna?"

Mark blushed. "Uh...well...um..."

Cotton smirked.

Mark sighed. "Well, she is a little...cute?"

"Ya ever met her?" Cotton asked.

Mark thought back on when he first laid eyes on her.

---

A couple days before Cotton's arrival

Derpy's Home

Mark was busy reading a book while laying on a couch. He can't wait to get a house for himself. He liked Derpy's home, but he desperately needed a home for himself.

"Hey Mark!" Derpy called out. Despite the fact that he uses the name Midway, Derpy was the only one who called him by his real name.

"Yeah, Derpy?" He replied.

"You got a letter." she said as she gave him a letter.

Mark took it and started to read it.

Dear Midway,

Please come to the castle at Canterlot.
There is a train waiting for you.

Sincerely,
Princess Celestia

"Isn't that the white princess gal?" Mark said to himself.

He shrugged and got up.

"Alright Derpy. I'll see ya later."

"Alright." Derpy said with a smile.

---

Canterlot

Mark whistled at the sights of Canterlot.

What he didn't like were the ponies. Too snobbish. Now he was really glad that he wasn't rich.

He eventually got to the castle. He convinced the guards there that Princess Celestia had sent him.

As he got to the throne room, he saw princess Celestia.

But what really got his attention was Princess Luna, who was standing next to her sister.

Mark was staring at her until Princess Celestia spoke.

"So glad to see you, Mark Walsh."

Mark gasped. "How did you...?"

Celestia smiled. "We know who you are, Mark."

Mark bit his lip. "They know who I am?" he thought. "Does that mean that they know what happened to my frien..."

"Yes." Celestia said with a small sigh and frown. "We know that."

Mark gasped and bowed his head down in shame.

"But don't worry Mark." Luna said, which brought Mark's head up.

"We know that you have a good heart." She said, which made Mark let out a tiny blush.

Luna let out tiny blush when she found out that Mark was blushing.

"We know that you are staying with a friend." Celestia said. "However, me and my sister took the opportunity to buy you a new house."

Mark gasped with joy. "Really!-? Thanks Celestia. Thank you um..."

"Luna," Luna said with a smile.

"Luna huh? That's a cute name." Mark said with a smile.

Luna giggled softly as she let out a blush.

Celestia noticed and let out a small smile.

"Oh and we also want to tell you something else. You are familiar with Cotton Hill, right?" Celestia said.

Mark let out a small surprised look as he nodded.

"Back on Earth, he is dying. However, I asked your god to bring him to Equestria when he dies."

Mark gasped and had a shocked face. "COTTON HILL?-!-?-!" He shouted.

Celestia and Luna nodded.

Mark just stood there. "Wow..." he muttered.

Celestia smiled. "That's all we need to tell you."

Mark sighed. "Alright. Thanks Celestia. Thank you Luna."

Mark bowed as he left.

"He seems like a nice pony, right Luna?" Celestia said.

Luna nodded. "He is nice...and cute." she said.

"Cute?" Celestia said with a raised an eyebrow.

Luna realized what she said and started to stammer.

"Um...I meant...uh...he...ah...um..."

Celestia started to laugh. "Don't worry about it Luna." She said with a smile.

Luna sighed and let out a small smile.

---

Now

"You called her cute." Cotton said with a blank face.

Mark grinned nervously.

"So what now?" Dale said with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh yeah." Peggy said. "Luna said that she and Celestia bought a new house for each of our families and will be ready in a couple days."

"Celestia bless them both." Dale said with a smile.

"Um...everyone except the six girls." Cotton said. "A word."

As everypony, except the Mane 6, came forward to Cotton, he gave them a stern look.

"Alrighty, look. These horses don't know that we're from Earth. So I'd advise y'all keep yer mouths shut. Alright?" He said in a serious tone.

Everypony around him nodded.

They eventually went back to the Mane 6.

"Alright." Cotton said with a sigh. "Who's staying with who?"

After some discussion, they agreed who's staying with who:

Peggy, Bobby, and Ladybird will be staying with Twilight.

Nancy, Joseph, and John Redcorn will be staying with Rainbow Dash.

Luanne, Lucky, and Gracie will be staying with Pinkie Pie.

Buck and Tilly will be staying with Rarity.

Didi and G.H. will be staying with Applejack.

Minh and Connie will be staying with Fluttershy.

Mark smiled. No pony gets to stay in his home. Just how he likes it.

Cotton sighed. "I don't know about you guys, but I'm going home."

Everypony agreed with him and they all headed home.

READ AND REVIEW!

It's been three days since the guys' families arrived in Ponyville.

Peggy, Bobby, and Ladybird got along pretty well with Twilight and Spike. Bobby thought Twilight was a perfect combination of cool and nerdy.

Nancy, Joseph, and John Redcorn became friends with Rainbow Dash. Nancy got a little suspicious that Dale was staying with Rainbow Dash all alone before she arrived. However, she let it go. Joseph thought Rainbow Dash was the coolest pony he ever saw.

Luanne, Lucky, and Gracie got along with Pinkie Pie. Gracie and Luanne absolutely adored the Cakes' babies.

Buck and Tilly became acquainted with Rarity. Buck even tried to hit on her, much to Boomhauer's dismay.

Minh and Connie liked Fluttershy, though they loathed Angel. Connie got along with all the other animals.

Didi and G.H. were all kind to the Apples. G.H. thought Big Macintosh was cool, much to Cotton's horror. G.H. became friends with AppleBloom and agreed to hang out with AppleBloom and her friends, even though he already had his Cutie Mark, which was a pair of brass knuckles. He also wanted Gracie to join, even though she too had her Cutie Mark, a yellow flower.

Mark got along pretty well with everypony, except Minh and Connie, though he disliked Kahn and Minh more than Connie. He especially liked Bobby and G.H.

---

Hank, Bill, Boomhauer, and Dale were standing near a fence at Sweet Apple Acres, drinking beer.

When they arrived at Ponyville, they were surprised that beer actually existed in Ponyville.

They chose this spot because it was the closest thing to an alley.

"Boy, I tell you what," Hank said. "We gotta build our own alley or hangout. Hell, maybe bring back that couch. What ever did happened to that couch?"

Bill scratched the back of his head with a nervous frown.

"You know what we should do?" Hank said with a smile. "I feel like playing a round of golf."

Bill and Boomhauer smiled. Dale, however, frowned.

"I'm pretty sure golf doesn't exist here..." Dale muttered.

The guys all frowned.

"Waitaminute." Bill suddenly blurted out. "What about making our own golf course? Remember when we made Rainey Street Country Club at our alley?"

The guys smiled.

"Let's go! Let's go!" Dale shouted with a wide grin. "Let's build a golf course!"

---

Both the guys decided that the field next to Sweet Apple Acres would be suitable for the golf course.

They decided to make a three hole golf course to see if their plan would work out.

After gaining permission from Applejack to use the fields, the guys started planing on what to do.

"Let's see..." Hank said as he looked at the blueprints he had with him. "We need golf equipment, three holes, and proper lawn care."

Bill shrugged. "Seems simple enough."

Hank adjusted his glasses. "I dunno. We can do the lawn care, but..." He muttered. "It seemed simpler back on Earth."

Boomhauer cleared his throat. "Hey, man, I tell you what, yo, how about dem my little ponies, man, yo, get some dang ol' helping hands, er hooves, yo."

Cotton then arrived with Mark and G.H.

"Hello gentlemen." Cotton said with a grin.

"Whatcha doing?" G.H. said as he looked at Hank's blueprints.

Mark looked at the blueprints. "A golf course? Eh, golf's alright, but I was born a football fan and I will die a football fan."

"Right on, Uncle Mark." G.H. said as he hoof-bumped Mark.

"We need help making this." Bill said.

Cotton raised an eyebrow. "Ya need help? I thought ya guys made one back at Rainey Street by yourselves." He let out an evil grin. "You remember Rainey Street Country Club?"

Hank, Dale, Bill, and Boomhauer glared at Cotton. True, they did make their own golf course at their neighborhood. But, they had to take it down. Not because they didn't have the license to build a golf course, but when Cotton visited on that certain day, he thought it would be funny to burn the backyard putting green with matches.

"You almost burned down my tree, dad." Hank said with an angered face.

Cotton chuckled evilly.

G.H. shrugged. "I can help. Got nothing to do."

Mark sighed. "I can get some other ponies to help."

Boomhauer smiled. "Dang, man, the more the merrier, yo, problem solved, I tell you what."

Cotton sighed and scratched the back of his head.

"Alright." He muttered. "What do ya want me at?"

---

Eventually, Mark brought the Mane 6, Big Macintosh, AppleBloom, Kahn, Bobby, and Buck.

The Mane 6, Big Macintosh, and AppleBloom had no idea what golf is, but they are eager to help the guys.

Cotton, G.H., Mark, and Kahn started to work on the first hole.

Hank, Dale, Bill, and Boomhauer worked on the golf clubs and golf balls.

The Mane 6 got to work on the second hole.

Finally, Buck, Bobby, Big Macintosh, and AppleBloom were working on the third hole.

Eventually, through hard work and three days, the golf course is finally complete.

Hank smiled and let out a small tear.

Cotton started laughing triumphantly.

Applejack let out a smile.

Buck put on a proud grin.

"So then," G.H. said with a small smile. "What are we going to name this golf course?"

Hank shouted, "Rainey Street Country Club!"

Cotton shouted, "Fifty Men Golf Course!"

Twilight shouted, "Harmony Fields!"

Buck shouted, "Strickland Greens!"

Everypony started to look each other with widen eyes.

"Ah hell..." Cotton muttered as he shook his head.

"Fifty Men?-!" Hank yelled. "Really?-!"

Cotton glared at Hank. "Well, at least I'm not naming it after a goddamn place!" He yelled. "What about the other two names? No one cares about 'Greens' and what kind of a golf course is called 'Fields?' Really?-! I worked on it! I should name it! Yer not mah daddy! I'm yer goddamg daddy!"

As everypony started arguing, Twilight stopped the arguing.

"Alright everypony. I'm sure we can settle this reasonably."

Cotton thought for a while and said, "How about we have a golf tournament? Winner gets to name the golf course."

Eventually, everypony thought that it was a good idea.

Everypony split up into four teams.

Cotton formed a team with Mark, Kahn, and G.H.

Hank formed a team with Bill, Dale, and Boomhauer.

Buck Strickland formed a team with Bobby, Big Macintosh, and AppleBloom.

Twilight formed a team with Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Applejack.

The guys didn't understand why Twilight's team wants to play, even though they don't know how to play golf.

Hank shouted, "Tournament, two days, noon! If you got any guts, you'll be there!-!"

Everypony then left.

Cotton muttered with an evil grin. "If four eyes win," he said as he took out a pair of matches. "Then he's gonna get a special surprise."

READ AND REVIEW!

The next day

Cotton yawned as he got off his hay bed.

He walked up to Applejack's house and knocked on the dad.

This time it was his son who answered the door. Both G.H. and Didi stayed in the house. They both used the pull-out bed from the couch. Cotton, however, wanted to sleep in the barn. He was used to it.

"Hey dad." G.H. said with a small smile.

Cotton patted G.H.'s head. "Hey Good Hank. Ready to help me practice for that tournament thing?"

G.H. nodded. He was ready to beat his older half-brother, Hank Hill.

"C'mon." Cotton said. "We gotta meet up with Mark and Mr. Kahn."

---

Hank woke up a little early so that he can practice early.

He met up with Dale, Bill, and Boomhauer near Everfree Forest.

Hank took out his golf bag that was filled with just four clubs: a driver, a wood, an iron, and a putter.

"I wish we had more time to make more clubs." Bill muttered.

"So it's agreed." Hank said. "I participate in the tournament. You guys are my...um...let's say pit crew."

"Dang ol' yo, man." Boomhauer said.

Hank used his magic to take out an iron and a golf ball.

He used his magic to swing the iron and hit the golf ball.

"Not bad." Dale said with a smile. "I have a feeling that we're gonna win this tournament. Hey. Did I ever tell you about this scene in the season 4 premiere in which..."

Dale went on as Hank practiced and Bill and Boomhauer just paid attention to Hank.

What they didn't know is that a hooded pegasus was watching them...

---

Buck met Bobby, Big Macintosh, and AppleBloom in a park to practice.

Buck admired Big Macintosh and hoped, if Buck brought back Strickland Propane, Big Macintosh would join Team Strickland. AppleBloom enjoyed being around Bobby, since she thought he was funny like Dale. She still wondered how he and Buck got their cutie marks. Bobby had a whoopie cushion cutie mark and Buck had a cash sign cutie mark.

"So how does gawlf work?" AppleBloom asked.

"Bobby, Ol' Top," Buck told Bobby. "Tell AppleBloom how it works."

"I don't think I can do that, Mr. Strickland," Bobby said with a nervous grin. "I'm not good at explaining sports."

"Oh come on Ol' Top," Buck said. "You did a pretty good job explaining golf when you had Chip."

"How did you know about Chip?" Bobby asked.

Buck smiled. "Hank told me. He also told me how he was gonna kick Dale's ass one day for killing Chip."

Bobby chuckled. "OK. I'll try."

As he explained it to AppleBloom and Big Macintosh, Buck took out a driver and practiced some swings.

They didn't noticed the hooded pegasus that was spying them...

---

Twilight, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie all met in another park.

True, they did not know how golf worked. However, Lucky, who personally knew how to play, volunteered to help them.

Eventually, Lucky, Luanne, and Gracie met up with Twilight and her friends.

"Hey Ms. Twilight, Ms. Pinkie Pie, Ms. Rainbow Dash, and Ms. Applejack!" Gracie said with a smile as she waved.

Twilight waved at Gracie.

Lucky walked up to the Twilight and her friends.

"Alright." Lucky said with a calm smile. "First off, who's entering the tournament?"

Applejack raised her hoof.

"Alright." Lucky said. "First, some drills."

He got in a swinging position. Then he pretended to swing.

Rainbow Dash yawned. "Boring! When do we actually learn how to play?"

Lucky shook head. "Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Come on now." he said in a calm voice. "I'm not just teaching you to play. I'm teaching you on how to be good at this game, well, that and how to play. Now try to do that swing I just did."

As Applejack practiced the swings, Gracie couldn't help but giggle at how goofy she looked when swinging.

"Come on sweetie." Luanne said as she rubbed Gracie's head. "Don't laugh at Ms. Applejack."

"But mama," Gracie said with a smile. "It looks funny. Like that time you told me that daddy swung while his legs were broken."

Lucky stopped swinging and stared at Luanne.

"You told her that." He said with a small frown. "You weren't even there. How did you..."

"You know how easy it is to control Dale with just cigarettes." Luanne said with a giggle.

Eventually, everypony started chuckling, even Twilight and her friends.

Rainbow Dash's laughter was a bit less hearty. She still don't know what cigarettes are.

They didn't noticed the hooded pegasus that was spying on them. He let out an evil grin.

---

Sweet Apple Acres

Cotton, G.H., and Kahn were all waiting for Mark.

Just then, the hooded pegasus, that was spying on the other ponies, arrived.

He took off his hood, revealing to be Mark.

"So!" Cotton said. "What did you find out?"

Mark grinned. "You know that Dale Gribble guy?"

Cotton nodded.

"His weakness is cigarettes. Can be easily persuaded." He said with a grin. "But bad news and good news. Bad news is that cigarettes don't exist. Good news is that I read a book at Twilight's library and tobacco DOES exist. I think it's at the Everfree Forest. I get it and somepony's gonna have to turn it to cigarettes."

Kahn shrugged. "I don't like doing favors for Gribble. But if it will make Hill lose, I'll do my best."

Cotton grinned. "Good. Looks like I have to practice just in case. Mark, go find the tobacco."

Mark saluted. "Yes sir!" He said before departing.

As Cotton took out a golf club and started to practice, he let out an evil grin.

"Mah boy ain't gonna beat me." Cotton muttered. "And I intend to keep it that way..."

Nighttime

Fluttershy's cottage

Kahn waited patiently as he walked back and forth in Fluttershy's living room.

"Everything alright dad?"

Kahn turned around and saw Connie.

"Oh yeah Kahn Jr." Kahn said with a smile. "Everything alright. Hey why don't you go help Fluttershy or your mother or something."

Connie yawned. "I'm feeling tired. I think I'm gonna take a quick nap."

"Alright." Kahn said. "Sleep tight."

As Connie left the living room, Kahn heard a knock on the door.

He went to the door and opened it.

He frowned when he saw Mark. "Oh it's you." He said with a glare. "You got the..."

"...tobacco?" Mark finished Kahn's sentence and gave back a glare. "Yeah I got it here. Here, take it and turn it to cigarettes or something. Then give to Cotton tomorrow." He said as he gave him a brown bag.

Kahn took the bag and slammed the door.

Mark rolled his eyes. "I really hate that Asian bastard..."

---

The next day

Cotton, Mark, and G.H. all met on the golf course.

Eventually, Hank's team, Twilight's team, and Buck's team showed up.

G.H. looked around. "Where's Kahn?"

Just then, Kahn showed up with a brown paper bag. He had an evil smile on his face.

Cotton noticed Kahn's smile and let out a devious smile. "Ya got the goodies Mr. Kahn?"

Kahn chuckled and gave Cotton the bag.

Cotton opened it and laughed evilly to himself when he saw the contents of the bag:

Eight cigarettes.

"Wait here." Cotton said to his teammates as he walked up to Dale.

"Hello Gribble." Cotton said with a grin.

Dale saluted.

Cotton chuckled. "No need for dat. I have a favor to ask ya. I knows ya can sabotage anything. I want ya to ruin Hank's chance of winning..."

Dale shook his head. "Sorry colonel. I'm afraid I can't do that."

Cotton grinned evilly. "Not even for this?" he said as he opened the bag, revealing the cigarettes.

Dale's jaw dropped and he tried to grab the bag.

Cotton, however, quickly hold up his hoof to Dale. "Do. What. I. Say." Cotton said with a cruel grin.

Dale slowly nodded.

"Hey Dale!" Bill shouted. "Come on! The tournament's about to start!"

"Once ya ruined Hank's chances of winning, ya can have the smokes." Cotton said.

He went to Mark, Kahn, and G.H.

"Showtime, folks." Mark said with a grin.

---

Both the teams agreed that whoever got the lowest score will name the golf course.

Cotton went up first. He walked up to the tee area of the first hole.

Taking out a driver, he swung and hit the ball, landing in the freeway.

Cotton smirked as he walked off the tee area.

Applejack went up to the tee.

Doing her best to swing, she landed the ball near Cotton's ball.

The guys were surprised. They didn't know that she could swing a golf club. Lucky let out a prideful smile. Cotton just raised an eyebrow.

Buck Strickland went up to the tee.

He swung and his ball landed in the sand trap.

He slammed his driver in the ground and let out a curse word.

Big Macintosh had to block AppleBloom's ears. Bobby blinked. "I never heard that word before." he muttered.

Finally, it was Hank's turn.

Using his magic, he hit the ball, landing in the green.

Dale, Bill, and Boomhauer cheered while Cotton's team let out a glare.

"Thought you said Gribble would ruin them." Kahn muttered to Mark.

"Thought you would shut the hell up." Mark muttered back to Kahn.

After a couple of minutes, Hank's score was 3, both Cotton's and Applejack's score was 4, and Buck's score was 5.

Hank went to the second hole.

He hit the ball, which landed in the green.

Cotton growled as he went up to the tee.

He hit the ball and it landed near Hank's ball.

Cotton smirked and walked away with an evil grin.

Applejack hit the ball, which landed near the green.

Buck went up to the tee area and let out a deep breath.

He hit the ball and, to everypony's surprise, he scored a hole-in-one.

Buck smiled and started to laugh and jumped around.

He didn't noticed the rock in the ground until he tripped over it and twisted his ankle.

He let out a yell as he grabbed his ankle. "My goddamn ankle!" he shouted as Big Macintosh, AppleBloom, and Bobby ran to him.

"Oh no!" AppleBloom shouted. "Your ankle's broken! How are you gonna play now?-!"

Buck looked at Big Macintosh.

"Big Mac!" Buck shouted. "I need ya to replace me! Ya saw how I swing! You should be able to do the same!"

Big Macintosh let out a confused look. He learned the rules from Bobby, but he never actually played it.

Nevertheless, he nodded and said, "Eeyup."

After a few more minutes, Hank and Cotton scored a 2, Applejack scored a 3, and, of course, Buck scored a 1.

"Let's see." Mark said as he looked at the scorecard he had with him. "Hank's total score is 5, Buck 6, Applejack 7, and Cotton's score is 6. "

"Hey dad! Look!" G.H. told his dad.

Cotton looked at what G.H. was pointing at.

Dale took out a driver from Hank's golf bag and replaced it with an identical one.

Kahn raised an eyebrow as he walked closely to the golf bag to take a quick look at the driver in the golf bag.

He then walked up to Cotton with an evil smirk.

"The driver's rigged." Kahn said.

Cotton laughed evilly. "I knew Gribble would never let me down..."

Big Macintosh went up to the tee with a slightly nervous face.

He took a small breath and tried to swing like Buck.

He hit the ball and, to his surprise, it landed near the green.

Everypony dropped their jaws.

"How did M. Freaking Bison make a swing like that?" Cotton muttered with a horrified look on his face.

Buck's team shouted a cheer as Big Macintosh smiled.

"Eeyup."

Hank walked up to the tee area for the final tee.

He swung, but to his horror, the ball landed in an Out-of-Bounds area.

Hank angrily kicked of a patch of grass on the ground and walked away.

Cotton's team let out an evil grin.

"Tough luck boy." Cotton muttered.

"How's it feel bro?" G.H. said to himself.

"I tell you what." Kahn whispered.

Mark let out a tiny laughter.

Cotton walked up to the tee and hit the ball, which landed near Big Macintosh's ball.

Cotton saw this and glared at Big Macintosh.

"Looks like it's time for ya to lose, Elmo." He said with an evil tone.

Applejack walked up to the tee and let out a small deep breath.

She swung and hit the ball.

Cotton, Hank, and Big Macintosh looked at where the ball landed.

They both dropped their jaws at what they saw.

The ball landed in the hole.

"A hole-in-one?" Hank said in a shocked tone.

"Motherf..." Cotton muttered.

"Well..." Mark said as he looked at the scorecard. "Her total score's 8."

Cotton smirked. "I have a 6. So no big whoop."

Hank had to swing again. He landed in a sand trap, much to his anger.

Cotton savored Hank's yells of anger.

After a while, Hank finally landed on a green on his fifth shot, though he gave up and forfeited the game.

"Someone's getting his smokes..." Cotton said with a satisfied grin.

Big Macintosh went up to the ball and swung. He landed a bit far from the green. He placed a hoof on his hoof.

He hit the ball and landed in the green. However, he was still far away from the hole.

He gave up, knowing that he couldn't beat his sister's score.

Cotton let out a small frown as he got in position.

He swung and his ball landed in the green.

He smiled. He can still be tied with Applejack.

He grabbed his putter and putted the ball.

But to his horror and shock, it ALMOST made it to the hole.

He let out a defeated yell as Applejack's team exploded with cheers.

Dale was saddened, but then Mark tapped Dale's shoulder.

Dale turned around and saw Mark.

Mark smiled and threw Dale the paper bag filled with smokes.

Dale caught it and let out a giant goofy grin.

After a long discussion (and arguments), the golf course was now dubbed, Harmony Fields. The winning team, Applejack's team, thought that this was a good name. Hank and his friends totally disagree.

Cotton frowned. G.H. noticed this and nuzzled his father's leg.

"Look on the bright side dad. You beat your son 'fair and square.'"

he said with a mischievous grin.

Cotton couldn't help but let out a mischievous grin as he put a hoof on his son's head. "Ya were always mah favorite, Good Hank."

---

Two Earth ponies were bored as they sat down on large rocks.

One was wielding a knife while the other one had an axe.

"You promised killing." One of the them said, "I don't see any killing!"

"This tires me." The other one said. "I am assuming that that there will not be any murder."

Two unicorns walked up to them.

"Patience Christian and Takashi." One of the unicorns said.

"Soon you'll get what you wanted..." The other said.

One of the unicorns looked at the ground with a furious look.

"The one whom we want dead has a loyal friend." He told the other unicorn.

"Don't worry. I have a plan." The other unicorn said.

Both unicorns thought about the one whom they want dead out of all things.

"I'm gonna enjoy sending you to hell, where you should belong."

The next day

Cotton was taking a walk with Mark.

Cotton let out a relieved sigh. "I can't wait for dat home for us to be be done."

Mark laughed. "Don't worry about Cotton."

Mark then looked a bit sad.

Cotton noticed this and said, "Something wrong Mark?"

Mark sighed. "Well, it's about my friends. I forgave myself for killing them. But I still wonder if they would have forgiven me..."

Cotton just remained silent.

Mark looked up in the sky. "Well, it's getting late. See you later?"

Cotton sighed. "Yeah. See ya later."

As Mark left, Cotton headed for Sweet Apple Acres.

However, on his way, he noticed something in the Everfree Forest that caught his attention.

He didn't know what it was but now he wants to know.

He went into the heart of the Everfree Forest.

He tried looking around for that thing he had noticed.

Cotton sighed and shook his head.

"Must of been mah imagination." Cotton muttered.

"Well, your imagination has lead you to the path to hell."

Cotton was suddenly charged by an Earth pony.

Cotton looked at the Earth pony and noticed that he was silver skinned with a blood red mane and tail. His Cutie Mark was a skull.

Another Earth pony emerged from the shadows. He was grey skinned with a white mane and tail. He had a knife Cutie Mark. Cotton noticed his face looked Japanese.

The grey pony took out a knife and threw it near Cotton's face.

He let out a disgusted face. "I should just kill you here, right here and right now."

The silver pony shook his head. "Back off Takashi. He's mine."

"You 'back off' Christian." The grey pony told the silver pony.

"All of you back off."

Cotton noticed two unicorns. One was black skinned with a white mane and tail. The other one was white skinned with a black mane and tail. They both had the same Cutie Mark, a dagger with some blood on the tip.

The black unicorn glared at Cotton. "He's the one."

"The one?" Cotton said with a small glare.

"Shuddap." Christian said as he punched Cotton in the face.

As Cotton was about to punch him back, Takashi held up a knife to Cotton's face.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Takashi said calmly.

"Taking advise from a Japanese." Cotton muttered. "You're too young to be one of the fiddy men I killed..."

"As I was saying," the black unicorn said. "He's the one we want."

The white unicorn walked up to Cotton and angrily glared at him.

"Where's Mark?"

"What?" Cotton said with a raised eyebrow.

"WHERE'S MARK?-!" The white unicorn shouted in a rage-filled voice.

Cotton glared at the white unicorn. "Why do ya want to know? Ya wanna marry Mark or something?"

Christian couldn't help but to chuckled slightly.

The white unicorn shook his head. "Last chance. Where is that bastard?"

Cotton just spat in the white unicorn's face.

The white unicorn slowly wiped the spit from his face and turned to the black unicorn.

"Is the spell ready?"

"Ready."

The white unicorn turned to Cotton. The black unicorn's horn began to glow.

Cotton glared at the white unicorn. "So what now boy?"

The white unicorn let out an evil glare. "As punishment for your lack of cooperation, my friend here will send you to a duplicate dimension. I hope you will enjoy it..."

Cotton just gritted his teeth.

"Oh. And don't call me boy." The unicorn said. "Call me...Alexander."

Cotton widen his eyes. "What? Alexander?"

Alexander looked at the black unicorn. "Now Joshua!"

Cotton shook his head. "Alexander? Joshua? Wait a minute. Are you guys Mark's frie...?-!"

---

After a bright flash, Cotton found himself in the the Everfree forest.

"Ugh..." He muttered as he put a hoof on his forehead.

"I'm at that forest I woke up in..." He muttered.

He looked around. "Damn it. I forgot where Ponyville is..."

He sighed. "Well, this shouldn't take long..."

---

A day later

Cotton couldn't believe it. He took a wrong turn and ended up being lost. He managed to get out, but he wasted a whole day.

"Well I should get to Applejack. She's probably...wait. Alexander said that I was in a duplicate dimension."

Cotton thought for a minute and ran to Sweet Apple Acres.

As he got there, he saw Applejack bucking apple trees.

"Hey Applejack." Cotton said.

Applejack turned around and raised an eyebrow.

"I'm sorry, but do I know you?"

Cotton blinked. "It's me! Cotton Hill!"

Applejack shrugged. "Sorry. Doesn't ring a bell. You look new here."

Cotton shook his head. "Cotton Hill!-! Mah son's Hank Hill, remember?"

"Who's Hank Hill?"

"What the...?-! YOU HAD BREAKFAST THIS ONE TIME WITH HIS THREE OTHER FRIENDS AND MR. KAHN!-?"

Applejack just shook her head. "Are you alright sugarcube?"

Cotton growled and walked away.

"I guess Alexander sent me here right when I died and went to dis planet."

Cotton realized something.

"Mark. He knows who I am!"

He then ran to Mark's home.

---

As he got there, he noticed it was too quiet.

He looked in the window and was horrified at what he saw.

He saw Mark hanging in a noose, tied to a ceiling fan. He had a note taped to his chest.

"Oh crap..." Cotton muttered.

Cotton immediately rammed to the window, shattering it.

Then he picked up a sharp piece of the window and threw it to the noose rope, cutting it.

Mark then fell to the ground.

Cotton ran up to Mark and put a hoof on Mark's chest.

"He's...dead..." Cotton muttered.

Cotton took the note from Mark's chest and read it.

To my loved ones and my friends: I'm sorry. But I couldn't take it anymore! Princess Celestia told me that my friend, Cotton Hill was coming...what happened then? HE DIDN'T COME! What happened if he didn't actually came. Why? WHY?-! He was my only true friend I had...just like Alexander, Joshua, Andrew, and Jacob...Alexander, Joshua, Andrew, Jacob...OH GOD WHY DID I KILL THEM?-!-?-!-?-!-?-!- WHY?-! WHY?-! WHY?-! I'M SORRY!-!-! I'M SORRY!-!-! I'M SORRY!-!-! I'M SORRY!-!-! I'M SORR

The rest were covered with scribbles. The note was slightly wrinkled with tears.

Cotton read this while shaking his head.

"Why Mark? Why?" He whispered.

He angrily punched a wall, leaned against it, and put his hooves on his forehead.

He let out a small tear. "Why couldn't it be Hank..."

All of a sudden, he heard a mare gasp.

He looked up and noticed Derpy.

She had tears in her eyes.

"What did you do to Mark?"

Cotton silently cried as he ran out of the house.

---

One day later

Cotton wished he hadn't ran out like that.

He learned that he is now accused of murder.

He never knew how unfair this world was.

He was hiding in a forest.

"Damn it Mark." Cotton said as he sat on a tree stump. "Ya were a fine soldier. Why'd ya do it?"

He sighed but then realized something.

"I'm in another dimension. Maybe I can find a way to get back to my old dimension..."

"There he is!"

Cotton turned around and saw two Royal Guards.

"You are under arrest for the murder of Midway."

Cotton glared at them and shouted, "Damn it! I didn't kill him!"

The Royal Guards ignored him and started to ran towards him.

Cotton started to run.

As he ran, he noticed an edge of a cliff.

He ran towards it and saw the ocean.

By then, the two Royal Guards surrounded him.

"Give up now! There's no way out!"

Cotton looked at them and then the ocean.

He then jumped off the cliff and dived into the ocean.

The guards looked at the ocean for a while.

They both couldn't find Cotton.

One guard looked at the other guard and shook his head.

As they both went away, Cotton dived back into the surface of the ocean.

Cotton gave an anger-filled look and calmly said in an evil tone:

"Alright. Here is what I am going to do. First, I am going to get off this ocean. Next, I am going to find a way out of this hell hole. Finally, I am going to find Alexander, Joshua, Christian, and Takashi and then...well... let's just say that I am Cotton Hill. And I killed fiddy men...soon to be fiddy-four men."

One week later

Cotton was in a cafe in Manehattan.

He managed to make his mane and tail white, changed his name to Topsy Brooklyn, and found a nice brown cowboy hat. He was somehow able to get some money.

Cotton sighed. "I gotta find a way out of here."

As he got off the table and placed some bits on the table to pay the bill, he walked away.

He didn't notice a small filly and accidentally bumped into her.

"Oops! Sorry 'bout that mister." The filly said in a Bronx accent.

Cotton noticed a gamboge filly with an amaranth mane and tail. She had no Cutie Mark.

"Um...that's alright." Cotton said calmly.

"Hey!" The filly said with a smile. "That looks like Applejack's hat."

Cotton blinked. "Ya know Applejack?"

The filly nodded. "Yup. She's my mom's sister and big sister of my favorite cousin, AppleBloom."

Cotton raised an eyebrow. "AppleBloom? May I ask what's yer name?"

"My name's Babs Seed. Nice to meet you!"

Cotton thought for a while. "Didn't AppleBloom and Gribble talk about a 'bad seed' or somathing when we had breakfast at AJ's?"

Cotton smiled. "Nice to meet ya too. I'm Cot...um...I mean Topsy Brooklyn." He really wanted to say to he killed fiddy men (he can't wait for it to be 54 men) but he didn't want to freak out the filly.

After a while, they began a conversation.

Cotton made up a story in which he is a storyteller traveling around the world. When Babs Seed asks him for a story, he says it's for grown-ups only and not for little kids. When she said she was not a 'little kid,' Cotton decides to tell her the story of when his one of his friends killed monster using only dental floss he kept in his boot. To Cotton's surprise, Babs didn't seem to be freaked out from the story.

She told him about AppleBloom and Cutie Mark Crusaders. She also told him about Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon and how she temporary joined them to ridicule the Crusaders.

As she was done telling that story, Cotton thought, "Now I know why Gribble hated those two. Those two are nothing but bullies and brats!"

Eventually, Cotton got along pretty well with Babs Seed. He even thought of her as a female version of G.H.

"So what are ya gonna do now?" Cotton asked Babs Seed.

"Well, me, my mom, my dad, and AppleBloom are gonna visit Canterlot."

"Cannerlot?" Cotton said with a raised eyebrow.

Babs giggled. "Canterlot." She corrected. "You know? Where Princess Celestia lives? Me and AppleBloom are going there by train."

"Celes-tea-something?" Cotton thought. "Wait! That's that white princess gal who can read my mind...WAIT! Maybe I can convince her that I didn't kill Mark and maybe get me out of this crappy dimension!"

"Is it alright if I join you? I'll pay for mah ticket!" Cotton asked Babs Seed.

Babs scratched the back of her head. "Well, I gotta ask my parents..."

Cotton nodded. "Fair enough."

---

After Cotton talked to Babs's parents, they decide to let him join them as long as he pays for his own ticket.

As Cotton was sitting on his seat, he realized something.

"Crap! What about Hank and his friends?"

As he thought about Hank and his friends, the train stopped.

"Well." Babs told Cotton. "We're at Ponyville to pick up AppleBloom."

Cotton looked at the window and saw Applejack and AppleBloom.

To his shock, he also saw a WANTED poster of him.

"Crap." Cotton thought. "Applejack knows who I am. What if she told AppleBloom about me?"

Babs exited out of the train to meet Applejack and AppleBloom.

Eventually AppleBloom ran up to Babs Seed and hugged.

"Babs! You came!"

"Good to see you too AppleBloom!"

Eventually they went back to the train.

"Hey AppleBloom." Babs said. "Say hi to my friend Topsy Brooklyn."

Cotton waved nervously.

AppleBloom titled her head. "You look familiar."

Cotton began to sweat. "Um...OK..."

Eventually the train began moving.

Thankfully, AppleBloom didn't realize that Topsy was actually Cotton.

Eventually, they got to Canterlot.

As AppleBloom and Babs Seed went to explore, Cotton told them that he had to 'do something really quick.'

Eventually, Cotton found a castle and assumed that Celestia is here.

He was able to sneak past the guards.

He sneaked into the Princess's quarters.

"Well then," Cotton said. "All I gotta do is find that Princess, tell the truth, get to mah world, and then kill those four bastards. Simple."

"Sure..."

Cotton widen his eyes and turned around. He saw a pegasus Royal Guard. He was blue skinned and had a yellow mane and tail. He was wielding a spear. His Cutie Mark was the spear he was wielding.

"You're that stallion that killed Midway. You're a sick pony.." The Royal Guard said as he walked towards Cotton.

"I didn't kill him..." Cotton said with an angered look.

"Sure you didn't..." The Royal Guard said.

"He didn't."

Both ponies saw Princess Celestia standing at the doorway.

The Royal Guard bowed. "Your highness, I was just about to apprehend..."

"You don't have to," Princess Celestia told the Royal Guard, "He is innocent. Aren't you Cotton Hill?"

Cotton nodded. "Yeah. Thank god you can read my mind."

The Royal Guard looked confused. "Read your mind?"

Cotton chuckled. "It's a long story."

Cotton then explained how he was from another dimension.

The Royal Guard raised an eyebrow. "Interesting..."

Cotton looked at the Royal Guard. "I forgot. Yer name is?"

"My name's Blue Fang."

"You can tell him your real name." Celestia told the Royal Guard. "He is from Earth, just like you."

Cotton was surprised. "From Earth?"

The Royal Guard sighed. "Alright. My human name is...Kenny...Kenny Walsh."

Cotton gasped. "Yer Mark's uncle!"

Kenny was surprised. "How do you know..."

"Mark? He's a friend of mine! Hell, he's Midway!"

Kenny gasped. "Midway IS Mark?-!"

"Yes he is." Celestia said.

"Then...then...that means Mark is...dead?"

Kenny collapsed and started crying.

Cotton was surprised. "Not the reaction I was expecting."

Kenny looked up with tears in his eyes. "Huh?"

"Mark told me about ya. Abusive uncle and whatnot."

Kenny cried even harder. "Oh god, I never did tell him the truth..."

Cotton was confused. "What?"

Celestia sighed. "I'll tell you. We should give him some privacy."

As Cotton and Celestia went to another room, she told him the details.

Kenny didn't mean to be abusive to Mark. The truth is, his daughter died. After Kenny's wife had given birth to his daughter, they divorced because of his laziness. He was not allowed to see his own daughter. When Mark was around 8, Kenny learned that his daughter and ex-wife both died in a horrible car accident. Kenny became depressed and took out all of his anger on Mark. Eventually, when he was accused of murder and jailed, he snapped and committed suicide in prison. When he died, he was sent to Equestria and found work as a Royal Guard.

Cotton was surprised. "Dear God..."

Celestia nodded sadly.

Cotton shook his head. "I gotta tell Mark this. Is there a way to get back in mah own dimension?"

Celestia smiled weakly. "Yes there is. I have dimension spell."

Cotton smiled gratefully.

Celestia's horn started to glow.

"Oh and tell Kenny I'm sorry..." Cotton said.

"I will." Celestia said as the horn became brighter and brighter...

---

Eventually Cotton found himself in the Everfree Forest.

"Did I get back to mah own dimension?"

Cotton sighed and decided to find out.

"Now then...Alexander, Joshua, Takashi, and Christian...to quote mah good fer nothin' son...I'm gonna kick yer ass!"

Cotton sighed as he tried to find his way out of the forest.

"Don't tell me I'm gonna get lost again..." He muttered.

All of a sudden, he heard a small sound.

He wondered what that small sound was.

"Could it be...oh please be that Alexander and his asshole friends..." Cotton said to himself.

He ran to the source of the sound but couldn't find anything.

He slammed his hoof on his face.

"Once again...mah imagination..." He muttered.

"I doubt it."

Cotton turned around and saw two female Earth ponies. One was white skinned with a red mane and tail. She had a microphone Cutie Mark. The other one was yellow skinned with a purple mane and tail. She had a magnifying Cutie Mark.

The white pony titled her head. "Is this the guy?"

"Yeah...it's him..."

Cotton saw two Pegasi. One was red skinned with a blue mane and tail. The other one was blue skinned with a red mane and tail. They both had the same Cutie Mark: a court balance scale Cutie Mark.

Cotton let out an aggressive glare.

"You are?" He said.

The red Pegasus sighed. "Jacob...Jacob Springer."

"Andrew Devin." The blue Pegasus said.

Cotton gasped. "Ya two are Mark's friends!"

Both Jacob and Andrew looked at the ground.

Cotton looked at the two girls.

"Oh, I'm Rena Redwall." The white pony said.

"And I'm Olivia Bella." The yellow pony said.

Cotton narrowed his eyes at Andrew and Jacob. "I'm guessing ya are here to finish what Alexander and Joshua started."

Andrew and Jacob widen their eyes and shook their heads. "God no! We're not with those guys!"

Cotton raised an eyebrow. "Not with them?"

Jacob sighed. "Let me explain. True that we were friends. But all that changed when Mark killed us. Apparently, God sent us to Equestria. Me and Andrew found ourselves in the Everfree Forest. After a while, we found Alexander and Joshua. There was one problem though."

"Me and Jacob forgave Mark." Andrew continued. "We understood why he killed us. I couldn't blame him. I just couldn't. However, I guess Alexander and Joshua didn't forgive Mark, because they wanted revenge. Me and Jacob realized how cruel they had become and we went separate ways."

"That's why they wanted to tell me where Mark was..." Cotton said as he put a hoof on his chin.

"Eventually we met Rena and Olivia, who were also humans from Earth." Jacob explained as he pointed to the two mares. "They're both looking for someone named Ludwig Bella, Olivia's brother and Rena's fiancé. We agreed to help them find Ludwig."

Rena looked saddened. Olivia put a hoof on Rena's shoulder. "Don't worry Rena. We'll find him."

Andrew sighed. "Apparently, we learned Alexander and Joshua found two other ponies."

"Christian and Takashi." Cotton said with a scowl.

"I think they were once serial killers back on Earth." Jacob said with a frown.

"Wouldn't doubt it." Cotton calmly said. Takashi was good with knifes and he could still feel that punch Christian gave him.

Jacob scratched the back of his head. "So...um...how is Mark?"

"He's good." Cotton replied. "He's got a load of friends and is happy as mah friend Gribble."

"And his racism?" Andrew said.

"Well, not that much Asians in Equestria." Cotton replied. "But I know someone who Laotian named Mr. Kahn and I don't think he and Mark get along pretty well. Then again, Mr. Kahn doesn't get along with mostly anyone."

Jacob sighed. "We really want to see Mark. But we need some time off before we can show ourselves to Mark."

Cotton looked in the ground.

"Well...we should go now." Andrew said. "And Cotton?"

"Yeah?"

"...please take care of Mark."

Cotton nodded.

Eventually, the four ponies left.

Cotton sighed and left. He had something important to do.

---

Twilight's House

Cotton knocked on the door.

Eventually, Bobby opened it. "Hey Grandpa." Bobby said with a smile.

"Hello Bobby." Cotton said with a smile. "Is Twilight there?"

"Yeah she's here." Bobby replied.

Cotton walked inside and eventually saw Twilight.

"Hello Cotton." Twilight said with a smile.

"Hello Breakin...er...I mean Twilight." Cotton said. "I gotta ask ya a favor. Ya can send letters to Princess Celes-tea-somathing, right?"

---

Celestia was reading a letter in her throne.

When she finished, she told a guard to send in Blue Fang.

Eventually Blue Fang was sent in.

Blue Fang bowed. "Your highness, you sent me?"

Celestia smiled. "Blue Fang, I would like you to take a day off tomorrow and go to Ponyville."

Blue Fang blinked. "Why?"

"You'll see." Celestia replied.

---

The next day

The train station

"I'm sorry but why am I here?" Mark asked.

"You'll see." Cotton said as he stood there waiting for the train.

"I just hope things don't get too ugly." Cotton thought.

Eventually, the train arrived.

Cotton saw ponies coming out of the train but eventually saw Blue Fang.

Cotton waved at Blue Fang. Blue Fang raised an eyebrow.

Blue Fang eventually stared at Mark.

Blue Fang was confused. "You look familiar."

Mark titled his head. "You sound familiar."

Blue Fang gasped. "Mark?"

"How do you...?"

"It's me...Kenny..."

Mark gasped. His surprised look then turned into an angered face.

"You goddamn bastard..." Mark hissed.

"Mark please." Kenny pleaded. "I know I was a terrible uncle but..."

"SHUT UP!" Mark barked.

"Mark, come on." Cotton said "Just let Kenny explain."

Mark glared at Cotton. "Alright fine." He said angrily.

Eventually, Kenny explained his story, tears coming out of his eyes. Mark's angered face slowly became a sad face.

"Kenny...I...I didn't know...why didn't you...?" Mark whispered.

Kenny started to sob. "I don't know...Oh god...I'm so sorry Mark..." He said as he hugged Mark.

Mark put his arms around his uncle's neck and started to cry. "I'm sorry. I'M SORRY! I was the one who let you rot in prison!-! I'M SORRY!-!-!-!"

Mark and Kenny hugged each other, crying and sobbing.

Cotton sighed. "One problem solved." He thought as he smiled. "But now I have something else to take care of..."

---

Alexander and Joshua was out looking for food.

Christian and Takashi stayed at their hideout in the mountains.

"Well, I'm bored." Christian said he leaned against a rock.

"I couldn't be more happy for you." Takashi sarcastically said.

"Hey, Takashi?" Christian asked.

"What do you want?" Takashi said with a glare.

"Before the world ended, what did you do?"

Takashi sighed. "Why the hell should I answer that question? Haven't your parents ever tell you to not mind other people's businesses?"

"Come on Takashi! I told you I'm bored!

"And I told you I couldn't be more GODDAMN happy for you!-!"

Christian just smiled. Takashi saw his smile and groaned angrily.

"Fine. I'll tell you. But, first, YOU tell me your story."

"Deal." Christian said. "Well, before the world ended, I was a serial killer. I was caught and was about to be executed. Apparently, that's when the world ended." Christian didn't explain the whole story to Takashi. There was a reason why he became a serial killer. When his wife was alive, she became pregnant with Christian's baby. Eventually, she gave birth to his son, Sean. However, his wife died giving birth. Sean was taken in by child services. Christian, who lost his wife and his son, snapped and started killing people.

Takashi sighed. He didn't care about Christian's story and was thankful that his story was finished.

"Alright. My turn." Takashi said with a frown. "I was like you. A serial killer. However, I was at Japan. I was caught and sent to prison. I was sent to Equestria right before my execution." Takashi, to his surprise, actually thought about telling him about Zen, his younger estranged brother. Takashi hasn't heard much from Zen, though he suspects that Zen hates him for abandoning him and for being a killer.

Takashi sighed. Christian just looked in the ground. The minute Mark is dead, he will go on and try to live a new life. He didn't know that Takashi was planning on killing him, along with Alexander and Joshua.

Takashi let out an evil look. "Once Mark is dead," he whispered to himself. "All of you can join with him in the Gates of Hell..."

READ AND REVIEW!

It's been a week since Cotton returned from the duplicate dimension.

The house built for the Earth inhabitants was finally finished. Hank, his friends, and their families and friends all adored the house. They all named it Arlen House. Cotton, in his opinion, disliked the name.

Cotton still kept his job kicking trees. He still couldn't wait to get revenge on those four.

Mark now tolerated Kenny. Kenny couldn't stay because he was still a Royal Guard.

Cotton had one problem though. He still wanted more money.

---

Arlen House

Cotton sighed as he lied down in his bed in his room.

"Something wrong, Cotton?" Joseph asked.

Cotton got up. "Oh. It's ya. Well, not everything. I still need money."

"You can always get a job at the weather factory! I bet Rainbow Dash can get you a j..."

Joseph paused as he realized Cotton didn't have wings.

"Oops. Sorry."

He then left. Cotton lied back down in his bed.

"I heard that some ponies want a babysitter."

Cotton got up and saw Bobby standing next to him.

"Babysitting?" Cotton said with a raised eyebrow. "I don't know...how much?"

"I think 10 bits. Each."

"Each what?"

"Babies. I think there are 10 of them."

Cotton smiled. "100 bit! Hot damn I'm sold!"

Joseph walked past his father's room.

"Hey dad." He said when he saw Dale.

"Hey Joseph." Dale said as he finished his cigarette.

Dale picked up the paper bag to get another cigarette.

He looked inside the bag.

It was empty.

Dale's eye twitched.

---

Cotton went to the place where he was supposed to babysit.

He saw a small pink house.

"Ugh. Who paints a house pink?"

He went inside and saw ten mothers, each holding a baby.

"This the babysitting thing?" Cotton asked one of the mothers.

"Yes it is." She replied. "Are you the babysitter?"

"Yeah. I guess." Cotton muttered.

"Good. Well, we got to go. Please take care of them."

She gave him her baby and walked away.

The others put their babies on the ground and also walked away.

"They didn't even pay me..."

Cotton put the baby down with the other babies.

The babies blinked at him.

Cotton scratched the back of his head.

"So...uh...hi. I'm Cotton Hill. Um...I killed fiddy men...I hope it's gonna be fiddy-four men...uh..."

Cotton got some word blocks and put it on the floor.

"Um...spell something."

The babies took the blocks and threw it at Cotton.

Cotton quickly dodged them. He let out a furious look.

"This is gonna be mah hardest mission..."

---

Eventually, the babies started making a huge mess.

Babies were throwing stuff all over the room. Toys were scattered everywhere.

Cotton dropped his jaw. "I've seen massacres less messier than this..."

Cotton sighed. "How about I tell y'all a story?"

The babies stopped and looked at Cotton.

Cotton sighed. "Alright good. Well then, let me tell ya the time I once lost mah shins. I was 14 years old. A bit older than mah grandson. But I knew Uncle Sam needed me. So I lied and joined the army. We had beat the Nazzys in Italy, and they shipped me to the Pacific theater. A Tojo torpedo sent our troupe's ship to the bottom. I was able to save three of mah friends, Fatty, Stinky, and Brooklyn. They were kinda like mah friends right now, only one of them was from Brooklyn. Out of the sun came a Tojo Zero and put fifty bullets in my back. The blood attracted sharks. I had to give them Fatty. Oh god! Then things took a turn for the worse. I made it to an island. But it was full of Tojos! They were spitting on the American flag, so I rushed at them. But it was a trap! They opened fire and shot mah shins. Last thing I remember was that I beat them to death with a big piece of Fatty! I woke up in a field hospital, and they were sewing mah feet to mah knees."

Cotton put a hoof in his forehead.

He noticed an awful smell.

He looked up and noticed all the babies soiled themselves.

"Goddamn it!"

---

Eventually, Cotton changed all of the diapers.

"Ah man...the time I slept under dead bodies in Vietnam smelled better than this." Cotton muttered.

Eventually, more babies started to make more noises and messes.

Cotton's right eye twitched. However, he took a deep breath and let out a relieved sig...

CRASH!

Cotton looked at the bookshelf, which was now laying on the floor.

"THAT'S IT!-!-!"

The babies all stopped what they were doing and looked at Cotton.

"I AM GETTING SICK AND TIRED OF THIS! ALL YA DO IS MAKE NOISE AND PISS ME OFF! YOU'RE LIKE THE FIDDY MEN I KILLED, SOON TO BE FIDDY FOUR MEN! HECK, YOU'RE MORE ANNOYING THEN THE FIDDY MEN WHOM I KILLED! I'M GONNA GIVE YA A COUPLE REASONS WHY I'M PISSED OFF!-!-!"

---

30 minutes later

"...AND YA INTERRUPTED A GOOD WWII STORY ABOUT HOW I LOST MAH SHINS AND FATTY! YA GOOD FOR NOTHING PIECES OF CRAP!"

The babies just stared at Cotton.

Immediately, they all started crying.

Cotton just rolled his eyes.

"I gutted a man, he whined less than ya kids." He muttered as he went to another room to take a nap.

As soon as he lied on the bed, he took out a pair of earplugs.

He put them on his ears and took a quick nap.

---

2 hours later

Cotton yawned. "Oh man. How long was I asleep?"

He took out his earplugs and noticed the silence.

"No crying babies? Must have gone to sleep."

He got up to check on them.

He dropped his jaw.

There were no babies. The window was broken.

Cotton looked outside. He saw baby hoofprints on the ground. They were leading to the Everfree Forest.

"Crap."

Mark's House

Mark lied down on his bed.

He let out a smile. Cotton Hill is with him, he forgave himself for killing his friends, he reconciled with his uncle, and he has friends who Mark cared for.

Mark sighed. "I got everything except one thing. But I don't know..."

He got up of his bed. "Princess Luna's loyalty! I'm just a small-time guy..." He said before letting out a sigh.

"Well I gotta do something! I can't just stand around doing nothing...maybe I can..."

There was then a rapid knocking on the door.

Mark raised an eyebrow. "Who could that be? It's like around 10 o' clock!"

He opened the door and saw Cotton.

"Oh hey Cott..."

"MARK! Thank God! Ya gotta help me!" Cotton shouted.

Mark was confused. "With wha..."

"I was babysitting some kids and now they're gone in that Evertree Forest!"

Mark widen his eyes. "Oh crap!"

"Ya gotta help me Mark!" Cotton said.

Mark nodded. "I'll do it!"

---

Cotton and Mark stood before the Everfree Forest.

"You sure the kids went here?" Mark asked Cotton.

"Damn right." Cotton said. He hoped that Mark would not meet the his friends...

Suddenly, they heard a demented laughter from the forest.

Cotton widen his eyes. "The hell was that?-!"

Mark gulped. "Beats me."

Cotton sighed. "Come on Mark. We can't let someone laughing stop us."

They could hear the laughter again.

Mark smiled nervously. "Yeah...we can't..."

Laughter again.

Cotton and Mark gulped and into the forest.

---

Cotton was walking around, looking for babies.

He heard that laughter again.

Cotton cringed. "Why does it sound familiar?" He said to himself.

As he continued looking around, Mark was looking at the bushes to see if he could find the babies there.

He then saw a shadow and thought it may be one of the kids.

He walked towards the shadow and saw a brown unicorn with a green mane and tail. He had a bow and arrow Cutie Mark. He was holding a basket of vegetables and fruit.

He smiled. "Hey there. Looking for something?"

Mark nodded. "Yeah. Seen any kids run around here."

The unicorn put a hoof on his cheek. "Well, I haven't seen any babies, but I have heard some baby sounds over there." He said as he pointed at a direction. "Love to check it out, but that laughter creeps me out."

They heard the demented laughter again.

"See?" The unicorn said.

Mark gulped. "Oh well. Thanks for the help, um..."

The unicorn thought for a moment. "Should I tell him...? No. I shouldn't."

"I'm...Hunter."

"Nice name. I'm...Midway." Mark replied.

"I'm sorry, but I have to go!" Hunter said as he walked away.

"Thanks again!" Mark said as he waved.

Hunter sighed as he walked away.

"At least it wasn't him..." He muttered.

---

Cotton was getting angry.

"Alright. This is starting to piss me off." He told Mark.

They both heard the laughter.

"AND THE LAUGHING IS STARTING TO PISS ME OFF!" Cotton yelled.

Mark widen his eyes. "Cotton?"

"WHAT?-!"

"I found the kids."

Cotton blinked and looked where Mark was pointing at.

They saw the ten babies together. They were scared and were hugging each other.

Cotton smiled and walked towards them.

"Thank God I found ya."

The babies started to shake in fear.

Cotton frowned. "Is this cuz I yelled at ya?"

They all heard the demented laughter, only it sounded closer.

"Maybe it's because of that!" Mark shouted as he pointed at the source of the laughter, which was behind the trees and shadows.

Mark held his breath as a Pegasus emerged from the shadows.

Cotton dropped his jaw.

"GRIBBLE!-?"

Dale saluted. "Colonel, sir! Oh hey Mark."

"Hey Dale." Mark said with a confused look.

"Ya were the one making that crazy laughter?-!" Cotton shouted.

Dale nodded. "Yeah. Sorry about that. I ran out of cigarettes so I went to Twi's library to see if tobacco exists. I read that it does exist and it's in the Everfree Forest."

"You were laughing insanely because you found tobacco." Mark deadpanned. "Cotton, you were right. This guys is crazy for cigarettes."

"So what are you and Mark doing here? And why are these kids scared?" Dale asked.

Cotton sighed. "Long story. Let's just say that I'd rather lose mah shins than babysit just ONE freaking baby pony."

Cotton looked at the baby ponies. "Alright. Let's get ya home."

---

Cotton, Mark, and Dale all lead the kids to the pink house.

"Hey thanks again Mark for everything." Cotton told Mark.

Mark smiled. "Don't thank me. Hunter was the one who helped me."

Cotton raised an eyebrow. "Hunter?"

Mark nodded. "Yeah. He's some Pegasus I met in the forest. He showed me where the babies were."

"Oh. OK." Cotton said. "At least it wasn't Mark's friends." He thought.

Eventually they got to the pink house.

Cotton sighed as he opened the door. "Let's just hope the parents aren't..."

"THERE HE IS!"

"...never mind." Cotton muttered as all the mothers gave death glares at Cotton.

Mark smiled. "Don't worry ladies. Cotton was, uh, just taking the kids for, um, stargazing."

The mothered were still glaring at Cotton. "I don't think they're buying that story Mark." Cotton muttered.

Dale brought the kids to the house.

The babies ran to their mothers, hugging them.

"What is wrong with you?" One of the mothers said.

"You should be ashamed of yourself!"

"The kids could have been in danger!"

"SHUT UP!" Cotton screamed, surprising everypony in the room.

"YA THINK I LIKE DIS? HA HA! WELL I DON'T! YA DON'T KNOW WHAT I HAD TO GO THROUGH WITH! THEY MAKE MESSES! THEY RUINED MAH STORY HOW I LOST MAH SHINS! AND YET YA BLAME ME! YA OBVIOUSLY DIDN'T RAISE 'EM RIGHT! HECK, YA DID NOT PAY ME BEFORE YA LEFT! WHO DOES THAT?-! REALLY?-!-?-! YA KNOW WHAT? KEEP THE GODDAMN MONEY! I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS CRAP!-!-!-! See ya Mark. At ease Gribble. SCRAM YA IRRESPONSIBLE MOTHERS AND MISBEHAVING KIDS!"

Cotton stormed out of the house.

Everypony just blinked.

"That was more unexpected than Twilight's scepter." Dale said.

---

Hunter went into a tree house in the forest.

He knocked on the bark six times.

The door opened. Hunter went inside.

"Sorry I'm late." He said to two ponies.

"Don't worry about it man."

Hunter smiled. "Here's the food."

"Thanks."

Hunter sighed. "I met someone."

"Was it...?"

"No it wasn't...thank God." Hunter said.

"Please tell me it was..."

"Sorry...nope." Hunter said.

"Oh well..."

Hunter let out a happy grin.

"Don't worry about it. Now come on. I'm starving."

"Yeah. I'm so hungry, I could eat a pony!"

The three started to laugh before they began to eat.

Sweet Apple Acres

Cotton yawned. He was really exhausted from last night.

He felt like sleeping in the barn instead at Arlen House.

"Damn those moms." He muttered. "Might as well go into town."

As he walked, he noticed AppleBloom jumped around happily.

Cotton smiled. "Hey young'un."

AppleBloom smiled back. "Hi Cotton!"

Cotton's smile was gone. "I called ya the thing ya don't like being called."

AppleBloom giggled. "I'm in a good mood today! Mah cousin Babs Seed is moving to Ponyville!"

Cotton widen his eyes. "Babs?-! Like the one from the alternate dimension?" He thought.

AppleBloom smiled. "Now we can try to get our Cutie Marks together! She even gave me a postcard telling me that she's visiting!"

AppleBloom showed Cotton a postcard.

The front of the postcard was a picture of Babs Seed standing in front of the statue.

Cotton cringed. He remembered that statue. It was were his identity was blown in the alternate dimension.

Cotton saw G.H. walking towards him.

Cotton smiled. "I never get tired of seeing you Good Hank."

G.H. smiled. "Likewise."

AppleBloom smiled at G.H. "Hey Good Hank!"

G.H. laughed. "It's G.H."

AppleBloom showed him the postcard. "Check it out! Mah cousin Babs is moving here!"

G.H. saw the picture of Babs. "Wow...she looks cute..." He said with slightly wide eyes and a small smile.

"She looks what?" AppleBloom said.

"Oh! Um...cool. Yeah. She looks...cool. Yeah." G.H. said with a nervous grin.

Cotton just chuckled. "G.H. and Babs. That should be interesting."

---

Cotton was walking in the middle of town.

"Hello Cotton!" Nancy greeted.

Cotton saw Nancy with Redcorn, Dale, and Rainbow Dash.

Cotton smirked. "Hey." He said to them.

"Hello sir." Dale said as he saluted Cotton. He had a cigarette in his mouth.

Cotton raised an eyebrow. "How did you make...?"

Dale smiled. "Oh. Hank makes them, as long as he gets 4 bits per cigarette and O bring the tobacco."

"Cotton." Redcorn said with a smile.

Cotton smirked. "Hey Redcorn."

"What's up Cotton?" Rainbow Dash said with a smile.

"Eh. Same old, same old."

"Heard that some mothers are in a really sour mood."

Cotton gritted his teeth. "Gribble told you why?"

Both Dale and Rainbow Dash both shrugged with a small smile.

---

Mark was walking in town with Derpy.

"I can't believe that Cotton lost all the babies in the forest!" Derpy said with a grin.

Mark chuckled. "Yeah. That's him."

Mark looked in the ground.

Derpy looked at him. "What's wrong Mark? Is it your...?"

"No. I forgave myself for killing them...it's just..."

Mark wondered how he was gonna put this.

"Hey Derpy."

"Yeah?"

"Um...let me put it this way...there's this stallion who secretly 'likes' this girl."

Derpy widen her eyes. "Are you saying...me...you...?"

Mark gasped. "Oh God no! I didn't mean that. I respect you as a friend but...I had always seen you as a friend and not someone whom I...um...(sigh)...love?"

Derpy giggled. "Hey don't worry about it! I respect you too! I just don't see you as somepony I love."

Mark let out a relieved smile. "Anyway, continuing on. Let's say that this girl is...rich...but this stallion isn't that rich. How would he...um...win her heart?"

Derpy thought for a while. "I dunno. But that kinda reminds me of Shining Armor and Princess Cadance."

Mark widen his eyes. "Yeah...You're right! Shining Armor may be the captain of the Royal Guard, but that guy's married to a princess! Thanks Derpy!"

"No problem. By the way, who's the pony you're trying to win?"

Mark coughed. "Uh...well...it's um..."

"Hey Mark!" Cotton shouted. He was with Nancy, Redcorn, Dale, and Rainbow Dash.

"I'll tell you about it later." Mark said to Derpy. He still had to figure out a way to tell her it's Luna he's trying to win.

---

"How's it going Mark?" Cotton said as Mark and Derpy walked towards him.

"Good thanks." Mark said. "And you?"

Cotton let out a giant frown.

"Oh right." Mark said as he scratched the back of his head. "You're still pissed off at the mothers and babies last night."

"Damn right." Cotton muttered.

Mark turned to Nancy. "You're Gribble's wife, right?"

Nancy nodded. "Yes. I'm Nancy-Hicks Gribble."

Mark looked at Redcorn. "You're John Redcorn, right? Nancy's ex-husband or something?"

Nancy and Redcorn widen the eyes. Dale just chuckled.

"Ex-husband...nice one Mark!" Dale said as he continued chuckling.

Mark blinked. "Oh...you're not...oops sorry. It's just that you always hang out with each other."

"He heals my wife. Or used to. Now they're good friends." Dale said as he finished chuckling.

"Oh...I swear that you used to be married." Mark said. "I mean, look at your son...um...Joseph, is it? He looks like Redcorn."

Nancy and Redcorn bit their lips. Rainbow Dash glared at them. "Yeah..." She said. "Joseph DOES look like Redcorn than Gribble..."

Cotton noticed Dale just standing there. Dale had a blank face.

Cotton closed his eyes and shrugged.

"Redcorn banged your wife."

Nancy and Redcorn both gave death glares at Cotton.

Cotton shrugged. "What? He was gonna find out anyway."

Dale blinked rapidly. He thought for a while.

"Joseph, Redcorn, Man with No Face, Little Strongheart, Chief Thunderhooves, Braeburn, Babs Seed, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, Revenge, Jedi, 7th Star Wars Movie, J.J. Abrams, Star Trek, Into Darkness, Khan, Connie, Joseph, Redcorn..."

He put a hoof on his chin.

"...Scepter, Discord, John de Lancie, Breaking Bad, Malcolm in the Middle, American Dad, Aliens, Avatar, Pocahontas, Redcorn, Joseph..."

He carefully removed his sunglasses.

"...Daring Do, That Rainbow Dash Smile, Gak, Spike's Card, Academy Record, Spitfire, Wonderbolt, Rainbow Dash, Best Pony, A second Chance, My Little King of the Hill: Friendship is Magic and Efficien-WAIT. Redcorn and Joseph..."

Dale's eyes were wide as dinner plates.

"Oh crap..." He muttered.

Nancy and Redcorn looked at each other with scared faces.

Rainbow Dash, Mark, and Derpy looked at each other with concerned faces.

Cotton just shrugged and let out a tiny smile.

"Dis gonna be good."

Dale pointed at Nancy, then Redcorn. He had a blank face.

"So. All. This. Time. You. Weren't. Healing. My. Wife?" Dale said in a robotic-like tone.

Redcorn nodded with an ashamed look on his face.

"You. Nancy. Sex?"

"Yes sug. I'm so sorry." Nancy said as she looked at the ground.

Dale remembered all the signs.

---

"Dale! This isn't what it looks lik-"

"Shut up. Now get off of my lawnmower and start healing my wife!"

...

"He's taking the fun out of this."

---

"Joseph's true father is-"

"NANCY LOVES YOU!"

"-an ALIEN!-!-!-!"

...

"What?"

---

"I dreamt of this Indian. But, he had no face. No eyes, no mouth, no nose, nothing! Then, I saw Joseph being born. I looked in his face...he had no face...like that Indian..."

...

"I am that Indian! I am a Native-American!"

---

"Nancy. What's John Redcorn doing in the shower?"

---

"I believe I deserve the ass-kicking. I slept with my best friend's wife...for 18 years!"

"Yeah Bill's wife was a tramp!"

---

Dale stared at Redcorn. "I thought you were stealing that lawnmower. I thought Joseph was an alien. I thought I was an Indian. I thought you had sex with Lenore. All that wasn't true?"

Redcorn nodded.

"Even having sex with Lenore."

Redcorn let out a disgusted look. "Of course not."

Dale took a deep breath. "Let me sum it up. You were having sex with my wife and you are actually Joseph's father?"

Redcorn and Nancy nodded, clearly ashamed.

Rainbow Dash stared at Dale, seeing what his reaction might be.

Derpy looked at Mark, who shrugged.

Cotton raised an eyebrow.

Dale stood there for a minute.

Slowly, he formed a demented smile, similar to Twilight's when she had to find a lesson to report to Celestia.

Dale let out a laughter.

Cotton cringed. It was a far more demented laughter than the one from the forest.

"I've been cheated on this entire time!" Dale shouted insanely, his smile still on his face.

He continued laughing and falling to the ground, jumping up and down.

Everypony in town stared at Dale.

"I think ya broke Gribble." Cotton told Redcorn and Nancy.

Dale immediately knocked down every stall and started tripping everypony he saw.

He stole a jacket from one of the stalls and wore it.

He flew to the empty schoolhouse and started writing on the chalkboard, "Rusty was Here. Go Watch Don't Mine at Night."

He flew to the playground and went to the sandbox. He grabbed a good amount of sand and put it in the pockets of jacket.

He flew to Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. He shoved them into a puddle of mud.

"Hey Tiara." Dale said with his sadistic smile. "POCKET SAND!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!"

He grabbed some sand and threw it at Diamond's eyes.

She screamed and covered her eyes.

He then flew around, creating havoc.

"So! What now?" Cotton said,

"We gotta find a way to make him calm down!" Rainbow Dash said.

Mark grabbed some cigarettes he had personally kept for himself.

"I'll try to calm him down." He said as he flew to Dale.

Dale was busy writing "BUTTON MASHxSWEETIE BELLE" on a wall, right next to a picture of a scepter with Twilight's head on top, which he also drew on the wall.

Mark landed next to Dale. "Hey Dale! Look! Smokes!" He said as he grabbed a cigarette and showed it to Dale.

Dale stared at it and took out twenty other cigarettes he had.

Mark blinked. He'd forgotten Dale had cigarettes.

Dale, however, smiled insanely and jumped on top of Mark.

"Hey let go of me!" Mark shouted.

"Mark!" Derpy shouted with a scared look on her face.

"Mark Walsh! No!" Cotton said as he ran towards Mark and Dale.

To his surprise, Dale was then jump-kicked by a green and blue striped unicorn. He had a white and black mane and a grey tail. He was wearing a headband on his head and was equipped a wooden pole. His Cutie Mark was the pole that he had.

Dale got up and growled. "That's it. Prepare to be destroyed by a lethal, dangerous, forbidden combination of the deadly arts of Tai Chi, Kung Fu, Ba Gua, Krav Maga, Taekwondo, Capoeira, Street Fighting, Wrestling, and Pega-Fu! Monkey Style - Squirrel Tactic - Alicorn-"

Dale is immediately interrupted when the unicorn then shot a beam at Dale.

Dale then fell to the ground, snoring.

Mark walked up to the unicorn. "Hey thanks Mr...um..."

The unicorn turned around and stared at Mark.

Mark was surprised when he saw that the unicorn's right eye was actually a reddish glass eye.

The unicorn let out a grateful smile. "I finally found you...Mark Walsh."

"That voice...that eye..." Mark said as he put a hoof on his chin.

His eyes widen.

---

Costa Rica

Four Weeks Before the End of the World.

A young man was surrounded by four thieves in an alleyway

He had a reddish glass eye.

One of the thieves was holding a wallet.

"Please! Don't! My sister needs that money! Or else she'll die! I swear! PLEASE!"

The thieves just laughed. "Likely story." One of them said as he walked away, along with the other thieves.

"NO! PLEASE, MY SISTER IS PREGNANT AND IN DEBT! NO! PLEASE NO! NOOO!" The young adult shouted as he flew to the ground.

Just before the thieves left the alley, the one who had the wallet bumped into Mark.

"Please!" The young adult shouted. "They have my wallet!"

"Is that so?" Mark said as he quickly snatched the wallet from the thief.

Immediately, all the thieves took out a switchblade.

One tried to stab Mark, but Mark punched him in the stomach and threw a trash bin at him, knocking out the thief.

Another tries to attack, but Mark dodged and punched him in the face, knocking him out.

Another charged at Mark, but Mark kicked him in the stomach and threw him at a wall.

The last one tried to flee, but Mark grabbed his throat. "Mark Walsh." Mark said with a grin. "Remember my name." He said before h knocked out the guy.

Mark then threw the wallet next to the young man.

"Here you go. Crap. I'm gonna be late." Mark said as he looked at his watch.

Mark ran away. The young man tried to run after him to thank him but he didn't know where Mark was now.

The young man let out a tear. "Thank you...Mark...Walsh...I swear I'll thank you...somehow..."

---

Mark gasped. "I gave you your wallet."

The unicorn let out a tear. "I was able to save my pregnant sister with the money. He then had a son. I don't know what his name was, since the world ended."

The unicorn looked at the Everfree Forest.

"I spent my time, training under a zebra named Zecora, still thinking about you. Eventually, I found out that you lived here in Ponyville."

He bowed. "Thank you. You saved more than my life, you saved my sister and her son."

Mark scratched the back of his head. "Um...My pleasure...um..."

"Ben Long." The unicorn said.

Mark smiled. "You're welcome Ben Long."

"Excuse me!" Cotton shouted. "Mind telling me what ya did to Gribble."

"I used a spell that will revert him back to normal. Should work."

Dale immediately woke up, yawning.

"Woah. What happened? I remember Nancy and Redcorn telling me that they had an affair, and then I woke up! I fainted, right?" Dale said with a nervous grin.

Everypony in town looked at each other and shrugged. They all nodded.

Cotton chuckled as he saw Diamond Tiara giving a glare at Dale. "Doesn't pay to be a bully, doesn't it?" He said to Diamond Tiara, whose only response is a raspberry.

"Oh and Redcorn and Nancy, I forgive you." Dale said.

"WHAT?-!" Redcorn, Nancy, Mark, Derpy, Rainbow Dash, and Cotton said at the same time.

"Just like that?" Mark said as he shook his head.

"John Redcorn's still a friend and Nancy's still my wife. As long as he's sorry and promises never to have sex with wife, and she's sorry and promises never to have sex with him, I forgive them both. Besides, at least I know that Redcorn's not gay, Joseph's not a alien, and that Nancy was impregnated by aliens." Dale said with a smile.

"Now I gotta find out more about Charlene..." He said to himself.

Cotton just rolled his eyes.

"Dis turned out OK...for everyone else that is..."

Arlen House

Cotton laid in his bed.

"OK, there's me, Hank, his friends, his families, my family, Mark, Ben, I think, Mark's friends, their friends, Kenny...Goddamn. How many Earthlings are there?"

"Hey Grandpa!" Bobby shouted. "Get ready!"

"For what?" Cotton said with a raised eyebrow.

"You, Dad, his friends, Mark, and those six mares have been invited to stay over somewhere called, Crystal Empire?"

Cotton shook his head. "Crystal? Really? Well, I have nothing to do. Alrighty, I'll go."

---

Train Station

Cotton, Hank, Bill, Dale, Boomhauer, Kahn, Mark, and the Mane 6 were standing, waiting for the train.

Ben wanted to come along. He wanted to protect Mark and to visit the Crystal Empire.

"Zecora told me about the Empire." Ben said. "The more she told me, the more I wanted to go."

"It's been a while since we visited the Empire, right girls?" Rainbow Dash said. The other girls nodded.

"I hope we see Shining Armor and Cadance!" Dale said to Cotton with a wide grin.

Cotton just shook his head.

Eventually the train arrived and everypony entered it.

---

Crystal Empire

"Well, we're hear!" Rainbow Dash shouted as the rest of the Mane 6 exited out of the train.

The guys stared at the Empire.

"Wow. Not bad." Kahn muttered.

Dale let out a tear.

Cotton yawned.

Eventually, they went into town.

To Kahn's surprise, the ponies were friendly.

"Wow. I thought this was a place with rich, rude ponies. Looks like I brought this three-hole-puncher for nothing." He said as he took out a three-hole-puncher.

"Three-hole-punch rich ponies' faces?" Cotton said with a grin.

Kahn nodded. Cotton chuckled.

"Hey! Twi!" A voice shouted.

Both Twilight and Dale smiled.

"Shining Armor!" Twilight shouted.

Dale grin grew larger. Cotton rolled his eyes.

Twilight ran towards the pony named Shining Armor and gave him a hug.

"Long time no see sis." Shining Armor said with a smile.

Shining Armor looked at Hank and his friends. "Are these your friends?"

Hank nodded. "Yup." He said. Cotton cringed. "Twilight told me about you."

Bill saluted. "Sargeant Bill Dauterive sir!"

Shining Armor chuckled and saluted.

Boomhauer shook Shining Armor's hoof. "Hey man good to goddang see ya man. You don't know me, likewise with me I tell you what, but this dang ol' Twi told me about you, yo. Canterlot Wedding, King Sombra, Equestria Games, man why in goddang ol' yo Twilight princess man dang ol' yo. Oh, and I'm Boomhauer, yo."

Shining Armor blinked. "I'm sorry. You lost me."

"Man, dang ol' listen man yo."

Shining Armor shrugged. "Well, nice to me you...Boomhauer."

Dale immediately shook Shining Armor's hand. "So good to meet you!-!"

Shining Armor chuckled.

He looked at Kahn. Kahn just rolled his eyes.

Shining Armor walked up to Cotton.

Cotton raised an eyebrow. "So you're a Royal Guard?"

Shining Armor nodded.

"You know Ke...I mean...Blue Fang?"

Shining Armor smiled. "He's one of the best Royal Guards and a personal friend of mine."

"He's my uncle." Mark said with a smile.

Shining Armor raised an eyebrow. "I didn't know that."

Cotton chuckled. "Well now ya do."

"Come on Twily." Shining Armor said. "Cadance wants to see you and your friends."

---

The guys dropped their jaws when they saw the palace.

Cotton just muttered. "Meh."

"Twilight!" A voice shouted.

Both Dale and Twilight smiled.

"Cadance!' Twilight shouted.

She ran to Cadance and began a small dance.

"Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake! Clap your hooves and do a little shake!"

Cotton just slammed his hoof on his forehead.

"So good to see you." Cadance said as she hugged Twilight.

She looked at the guys. "Are they your friends?"

Twilight nodded.

Cadance walked up to Shining Armor.

"You think they're..." She whispered.

"Wouldn't doubt it." He whispered back.

"Um...Twilight? Can I talk to your friends privately please?" Cadance asked Twilight.

Twilight nodded. "Sure thing. Come on girls. Let's go she what the Crystal Ponies are selling."

As the Mane 6 left, it was just the guys, Cotton, Mark, Ben, Shining Armor, and Princess Cadance.

"You're from Earth, aren't you?" Shining Armor asked.

The guys gasped and had shocked faces.

"How did ya?" Cotton asked.

Cadance giggled. "You're not the only ones. You can come out now!"

Everypony turned around and saw 6 Crystal Ponies, all of them were unicorns.

One was red with a brown mane and tail. He had a shopping cart Cutie Mark.

The other was orange with a dark brown mane and tail. He had a trumpet Cutie Mark. He also had a small beard and was holding a trumpet.

The oldest of the six was dark green with a white mane and tail. He had a bayonet Cutie Mark.

One of them, who looked relaxed, was light green with a grey mane and tail. He had an apple Cutie Mark.

One of them, who had a long brown beard, was black with a brown mane and tail. He had a guitar Cutie Mark and was holding a guitar.

Finally, the last one, who looked Japanese, was brown with a black mane and tail. He had a wrench Cutie Mark.

The red unicorn waved. "Hey."

Hank gasped. "BUCKLEY!-?"

The orange unicorn waved his trumpet in the air. "What about me?"

It didn't take Dale a while to figure out who it was. "CHUCK MANGIONE?-!"

The old dark green unicorn saluted. "At ease!"

"TOPSY?-!" Cotton shouted.

The light green unicorn waved. "Hey Hank." He said in a relaxed voice.

"APPLESEED?-!" Hank shouted.

"Hey there Hank!" The black bearded unicorn said.

"DUSTY?-!" Kahn shouted with a smile.

Finally, the brown Japanese unicorn walked to Hank and and bowed his head.

"It's been a while...brother."

"JUNICHIRO?-!-?-!" Hank and Cotton shouted at the same time.

Junichiro smiled. "So good to see you father."

Cotton stared at him before letting out a giant smile. "WHO-WEE! So good to see you Junty-Joe!"

Junichiro glared at Cotton.

Cotton smiled. "Just kidding...Junichiro."

Hank turned to Cadance. "You know them?"

She nodded. "Before your world ended, Topsy and Buckley came to Equestria as Crystal Ponies, since they both died before the end of your world. Eventually, Chuck, Appleseed, Dusty, and Junichiro came to this world. They told us about 'Earth' and we accepted them and let them stay in the Crystal Empire. Me and my husband, Shining Armor, knew that you were from Earth, since all of you act differently."

"Like him." Shining Armor said as he pointed at Boomhauer.

Boomhauer shook his head. "Hey man yo, it's how I talk, I tell you what. I don't judge you, man."

"We're also aware of...'bronies.'" Shining Armor said with an amused smile.

Junichiro, Dusty, Topsy, and Chuck stared at Buckley and Appleseed.

Buckley shrugged. "What? I like that show."

Appleseed nodded. "It's a good, relaxing show."

Dale came up to Buckley and Appleseed and gave them both a "brohoof."

Cotton sighed. "So ya know who we are? Oh great."

"Does Twilight or her friends know?" Shining Armor asked.

Hank and his friends (and Kahn) shook their heads.

"Nope." Mark said.

"Zecora knows." Ben said.

Everypony looked at Ben.

"You told her?" Mark asked Ben.

"She knew. My body looked unusual and she noticed how I acted more like a human than a horse."

"I always wanted to ask." Dale asked. "What's with your body?"

Ben shrugged. "I asked God to make me 'look cool.' In my opinion, I think this is good enough."

Everypony dropped their jaws in disbelief.

"What? Cotton has blood red eyes." Ben said.

Cotton nodded. "He has a good point."

"So what now?" Hank asked.

"Can we stay over?" Dale asked.

"Sure thing." Cadance said with a smile. "We'll show you to your rooms."

"Oh and in my opinion, I think Twilight and her friends should know where you guys really are from." Shining Armor told the guys.

Cotton chuckled. "Good one Shiny."

As the guys left, it was just the six Crystal Ponies.

"So what do you think, now that more Hills live in Equestria?" Dusty asked Junichiro as he nudged his shoulder.

"Pretty good. Though Hank and I have some things in common, I respect my father, and I enjoy having Bobby around." Junichiro replied.

"And me?" Dusty asked Junichiro.

"Never heard of this ZZ Top." Junichiro said with an evil smile.

Dusty stammered. "What about this?-!" He said as he took out his guitar and started playing "Tush."

"Please stop." Junichiro muttered as he covered his ears with his hooves.

Topsy shook his head. "Ya young'uns should be ashamed of yerself. Youse would never make it in the army." He said. "Especially...YOU!" He said as he pointed to Buckley.

"What?" Buckley said as he shrugged. "Is this because of that Mega-Lo-Mart explosion? Hank distracted me!"

"I was almost killed!" Chuck shouted.

"Well it's not my fault you lived in that store anyway!" Buckley shouted.

Eventually, Topsy, Chuck, and Buckley started fighting. Dusty and Junichiro soon argued about Rock n' Roll.

Appleseed just stood there. "You guys should, like, relax or something."

---

Nighttime

Cotton chuckled as he laid down in his bed.

"Tell them that I'm human...like that'll ever happe-"

He was interrupted by a mare screaming in horror.

He got out of bed and went outside.

He noticed Shining Armor, Princess Cadance, Hank and his friends, Mark, Ben, and the six Crystal unicorns.

To their horror, they saw green zombie-like creatures walking in the streets.

To the guys surprise, they not only looked human, but they also looked Japanese.

"Wait a minute..." Cotton said with narrow eyes.

He carefully walked up to one creature.

"I KNOW YA! I KILLED YA!-!"

Twilight blinked. "Killed him?"

Cotton ran to one who had a big hole in his stomach.

"I BAZOOKA'D YA!-!"

Applejack looked confused. "Bazooka?"

Cotton saw one creature with bandages wrapped around his chest.

"YA! I SHOT YA THRU THE HEART!-!"

"The heart?" Pinkie said in a scared tone.

Cotton noticed a creature with multiple knife wounds.

"I GUTTED YA TIL I GOT BORED!-!"

"Gutted?" Rainbow Dash stammered.

Cotton saw a creature with burnt skin.

"I TORCHED YA TIL MY FLAMETHROWER RAN OUT OF FUEL!-!"

"Torched?" Rarity said with a scared look.

Cotton saw another creature with missing teeth.

"YOU! GOT YER TEETH IN A JAR BACK ON EARTH!-!"

Fluttershy cringed. "Teeth?-!"

Twilight raised an eyebrow. "Earth?"

"YOU! YER ALL...!-!-!" Cotton said as he backed away from the creatures.

He turned to Shining Armor. "HOW MANY ARE THERE?-!-?-!"

Shining Armor gulped. "The townspeople think there are...50 of them."

Cotton lowered his ears.

"Crap."

Yes I know...KOTH got cancelled before MLP aired. It's my story OK?

READ AND REVIEW!

"EVERYPONY! INTO THE PALACE! IT'S THE ONLY SAFE PLACE!" Shining Armor shouted in a loud voice.

Eventually, everypony ran to the palace. To Princess Cadance's relief, there were no casualties.

Ben looked at the creatures.

"What are these things?" He said as he saw the creatures roaming the streets, destroying anything they see.

"Zombies?" Mark said with a shrug.

"I doubt it." Ben said. "They would be trying to break into the palace and eating our brains, not wrecking everything around them."

The Mane 6 walked up to Mark, Ben, Hank and his friends, and Cotton.

"A word please." Twilight said with a concerned face.

Cotton sighed and nodded.

They walked away to a room.

"Alright. Who are you?" Twilight said with a small glare.

Mark and Ben looked at each other with concerned faces. Hank and his friends just scratched the back of their necks.

Cotton groaned. "We're humans." He muttered.

The Mane 6 gasped. "HUMANS?-!" Rainbow Dash shouted. "YOU MEAN LYRA WAS TELLING THE TRUTH ALL ALONG!-!"

Dale couldn't help but let out a small smile.

"But what about those creatures?" Twilight asked. "How do you know them?"

Cotton sighed. "They are the fiddy men I killed..."

The Mane 6 let out surprised looks.

"I'll explain from the beginning..." Cotton said as he lowed his ears.

He explained about how he had fought in WWII, lost his shins, and started a new life. He had a son whom he didn't like, and eventually a son whom he adored more than anyone. Eventually, due to a sushi restaurant accident, he then died. He was sent to Equestria by his god so that Cotton could 'redeem himself.'

Eventually, Dale came up and explained how their world ended and that they were sent to Equestria.

Hank walked up and explained a bit about himself and his friends. He didn't tell the girls about Dale being a brony, since he thought that would be too weird.

Bill then explained a bit about Hank's families, and the other people the guys knew from Earth, that came to Equestria.

Mark walked up and explained that he and Ben was also from Earth. He told them that Midway wasn't his real name and that it is actually Mark Walsh. He didn't mentioned about his friends whom he killed.

Ben also explained that Mark saved him and his sister's and unborn nephew's life, which is why he is in debt to Mark.

Kahn explained how golf was something from Earth and why the guys wanted it to name it after their homes.

Boomhauer explained about bronies, but the girls didn't understand what he was saying, much to Hank's relief.

Cotton just sighed and looked down at the ground. "Well now ya know."

"Why didn't ya tell me the truth?" Applejack said in a sadden voice.

Cotton let out a tear. When he realized his tear, he shook his head.

"Don't cry soldier..." He muttered to himself.

"Let me ask ya a question." Applejack said. "Ya lied to us about where yer really from. But did yer god really sent ya here so that ya may redeem yerself?"

Cotton looked at Hank, his friends, Ben, and Mark.

"Well..." Cotton said. "At first, I didn't wanna. But apparently, I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think God really knows what he's doing."

Mark let out a smile.

"He sent me mah friends so that I may have a second chance." Cotton said as he smiled back at Mark.

The Mane 6 stared at Cotton.

Applejack smiled. "I believe ya."

Twilight smiled. "I believe you."

Rarity nodded. "Me too."

Rainbow Dash grinned. "Me three!"

Pinkie Pie smiled widely. "ME FOUR!"

Fluttershy smiled weakly. "Me...um...five."

Cotton smiled. "Thanks girls."

"Um..sorry to kill the moment," Ben said as he clapped his hooves. "But we oughta deal with these creatures."

Cotton took a deep breath. "I'll take care of them." He said, earning him everypony's concerned faces. "I killed them before, I can kill them again."

Mark walked up. "Count me in."

Ben walked up. "Let's do this." He said as he got his pole ready.

"What about us?"

Everypony turned to six Crystal Ponies.

"Have we met?" Applejack asked.

"I am Junichiro. These are my acquaintances, Dusty, Buckley, Topsy, Appleseed, and Chuck."

Dusty spoke up. "Princess Cadance and her husband gave us a home, and we'll be damned if zombies are gonna destroy it!" He said as his horn glowed.

Topsy took out his bayonet. "Time to kill!" He said as he took a deep breath and puffed up his cheeks extremely large, which made everypony around him uncomfortable. Cotton just laughed.

Appleseed smiled as his horn glowed. "Time for a little action."

Buckley chuckled as his horn glowed. "Right on Apples."

Chuck got out his trumpet. "This bad boy broke that anger management teacher's face for one month. Add my magic, and I'm an unstoppable fighting machine! I am Chuck Mangione! Not Chick Mangione!"

Cotton grinned. "Looks like it's up to me, Mark, Ben, and the Crystal Six!"

---

After convincing Shining Armor and Princess Cadance that they'll take care of everything, Cotton and his eight allies walked outside.

Cotton growled at the creatures.

Mark smirked as he cracked his hooves. Ben got his pole ready.

The horns of Junichiro, Buckley, Topsy, Chuck, Appleseed, and Dusty all began to glow.

"Kill 'em all." Cotton said in an evil voice. "Let's all I ever asked for mah men."

Immediately, Cotton ran up to a creature and kicked it in the face, snapping its neck.

Mark picked up a wooden plank and smashed two heads.

Ben ran to one creature and impaled its head with his pole.

He took it out, backing away as he cleaned his pole.

As he repeated this process to three other creatures, Topsy ran and stabbed a creature in the head.

He laughed and puffed his cheeks as he stabbed four more creatures.

Dusty got his guitar and smashed it on a creature's head.

He chuckled as he bashed two more creatures.

Appleseed stared as creatures ran towards him.

Appleseed let out a calm yawn as he used his magic to get a hammer and smashed the heads of three creatures.

Eventually, Chuck attacked creatures with his trumpet.

As he finished killing four creatures, he noticed Buckley killing two creatures with a shovel.

Chuck noticed a creature sneaking up to Buckley and charged at the creature.

As he finished killing it, he said in short breaths to Buckley, "You owe me big time..."

Junichiro used his magic to wield two wooden planks.

He smirked as he smashed six heads.

Cotton, Mark, and Ben charged at four creatures and, without ease, killed them.

"Just fifteen more..." Cotton said as he panted. Mark and Ben were also tired. They noticed that all the creatures they killed were reduced to dust.

"Leave it to us." Junichiro said as he and his Crystal allies walked towards the creatures.

Cotton smiled as he saw Junichiro, Dusty, Buckley, Topsy, Appleseed, and Chuck surround the last fifteen creatures.

Chuck's horn glowed. "You shouldn't mess with us."

Appleseed's horn glowed. "We're, like, unstoppable."

Buckley's horn glowed. "Guess what? Chicken butt."

Topsy's horn glowed. "Time to die, my precious."

Dusty's horn glowed. "We are Crystal Ponies."

Junichiro's horn glowed. "This is our home. And we will not let you destroy it..."

Immediately, they all shot a beam from their horns, reducing the creatures to dust.

Mark and Ben stared in awe as Cotton smiled triumphantly.

Junichiro, Dusty, Buckley, Topsy, Appleseed, and Chuck all let out a cheer.

Dusty played his guitar and Chuck played his trumpet as Topsy puffed his cheeks while smiling.

Appleseed took out two apples and gave one to Buckley.

Junichiro smiled and said, "Victory," in Japanese.

Eventually, all the ponies inside the palace walked outside and were surprised and delighteda to see that the creatures were gone.

Shining Armor walked up to Cotton. "We don't know how to thank you..." He said with a grateful smile.

Cotton smirked. "Start by thanking the Crystal Six." He said as he pointed to Junichiro, Dusty, Buckley, Topsy, Appleseed, and Chuck.

"They did most of the work." Mark said.

"They're the ones whom you should be thanking." Ben said.

Eventually, the Crystal Empire townspeople started cheering for Junichiro, Dusty, Buckley, Topsy, Appleseed, and Chuck, now known as the Crystal Six.

Cotton chuckled. "You didn't do bad, Ben."

Ben smiled. "I'm gonna have to thank Zecora again..."

Cotton then frowned. "I have a feeling that Alex and his friends were involved in this..." He thought. "I am really gonna enjoy killing them..."

It's been three days since those zombie-like creatures attacked.

Cotton and his friends enjoyed their stay at the Crystal Empire.

The Crystal Six were now favorited by everypony in the Crystal Empire.

The Mane 6 knew about the humans' origins and still accepted them.

They promised not to tell anypony about the humans' origin.

Cotton now had two issues:

Revenge on Alex and money for himself.

---

Arlen House

Cotton took a nap as he lied on his bed.

As he slept, all these weird thoughts came to his head.

"Ugh...no Hank's wife...I don't want yer big feet...ugh...who the hell is Mane-iac?...ugh...Rainbow Dash, stop smiling like that...it's giving me the creeps...ugh...Equestrian Academy?...wait...who's kkman57?...ah forget it...what the hell is gak?...how gives a crap about Weird Al...must kill Fidel Castro...need mah whip for...ugh?"

Cotton woke up and blinked.

"Mah whip...MAH WHIP! That's it! I know how to get money!" He said with a wide smile.

---

Carousel Boutique

Rarity was busy making a dress when Boomhauer came in.

"Rarity, yo." Boomhauer said.

Rarity smiled. "Hello Boomhauer."

"Just dang ol' thought of dropping by wit my favorite little pony, I tell you what. Where's dang ol' Sweetie Belle, yo?"

"Oh she's with her friends. By the way, I've heard about your 'dates' with other mares." Rarity said with an amused smile.

Boomhauer froze. "From dang ol'..?"

Rarity giggled. "All I can say is that I think Berry Punch, Carrot Top, and Colgate are in love with you now."

Boomhauer gulped.

Suddenly, the door opened and Cotton entered in.

Boomhauer was amused to see that Cotton had a whip with him.

He was also wearing a hat, which had the words 'Cop' crossed out and replaced it with the words 'Sheriff.'

Cotton saluted. "Boomhauer, say hello to the new sheriff in town."

Boomhauer didn't know whether to laugh or to urinate on himself.

Rarity giggled. "How did you...?"

"I have mah ways." Cotton said as he crossed his arms and let out a prideful smile.

"So what in dang ol' now?" Boomhauer asked.

"Seen any crimes?" Cotton asked.

Rarity shook her head. "Not that I know of."

Boomhauer rolled his eyes. "Man, dang ol' stupid man."

"Ah zip it Boomhauer." Cotton blurted out as he walked out the door. "Ya got yer own problems to take care of. I heard that all the stallions who had a crush on Berry Punch, Carrot Top, and Colgate all wanna kill ya tonight."

As Cotton left, Boomhauer widen his eyes and looked at Rarity.

"Well...they're not going to literally kill you..." Rarity said with a nervous grin.

Boomhauer gulped and lowered his ears.

"Dang ol' crap."

---

Cotton was bored. He couldn't find a case.

"Hmm..." He said to himself. "Maybe Twilight has a problem for me to solve..."

He headed towards Twilight's house.

He knocked on the door.

Spike opened the door.

"Hey Spyro." Cotton greeted with a smirk.

"Hey Hank's father." Spike replied with a smirk.

Cotton frowned.

"I hate being called that."

"I know. Dale told me that."

Cotton peeked inside and saw Dale sitting down with a book.

Dale grinned nervously as Cotton glared at Dale.

---

Mark's House

Mark sighed as he took out a piece of paper.

He wanted to ask Shining Armor about how he met Princess Cadance, but Mark was afraid that Shining Armor would find out that the pony Mark is trying to win is Luna.

Mark decided to write a letter.

Dear Princess Celestia,

I just wanna say that I'm grateful for giving a home to Cotton and his friends. I wish there was a way I can thank you.

Sincerely,

Mark Walsh

P.S.

The Mane 6 knows that me and my friends are from Earth. They still accept us as friends.

Mark started to sweat as he wrote:

P.P.S.

Tell Luna I said hi and thank you for everything.

Mark put a hoof on his forehead.

"Well, it's better than nothing..." He muttered.

He left his house with the letter and walked towards Twilight's house.

---

"Are ya sure ya don't need mah service?" Cotton asked Twilight as he crossed arms.

Twilight was busy reading a book.

Twilight giggled. "That's sweet of you, but I don't need any service."

Cotton sighed. "Well, since I'm here, got any police books or somathing?"

"Police?" Twilight asked with a confused look.

"He's saying he wants a book on how to be a good detective!" Dale shouted.

"Oh." Twilight said as she gave Cotton a book. "Start with this one."

Cotton sighed and sat down to read the book.

He heard the door open.

"Hey Cotton."

Cotton smiled. "Hey Mark. What are ya doing here?"

Mark smiled. "Just doing a quick thing." He said as he came up to Spike.

"Hey Spike." He whispered to Spike as he got out his letter and a large green gem. "Deliver this letter to Celestia and don't say a word to anypony about this and I'll give you this gem."

Spike stared and drooled at the gem and nodded as he grabbed to the gem and letter.

Mark smirked as Spike ate the gem in one bite.

As he was about to leave, he noticed a book about romance.

He noticed how Cotton, Dale, Twilight, and Spike wasn't looking.

Mark let out a small smile.

"Why not? I'll just take this and bring it back when I'm done. Simple."

He grabbed the book and left.

Dale got up. "Well I'm going. See you Twilight!"

"See you." Twilight replied.

As Dale left, Twilight got up.

"Well, I'm done with this book, time to rea...hey, what happened to Winning Somepony's Heart for Morons?"

Cotton put his book down. "Huh?"

"I could've sworn it was here." Twilight said as she started to look around.

Cotton put a hoof on his chin. "Hmm...this sounds like...A CASE!"

He put down the book and let out a huge smile. "Don't worry Breaking Dawn! I'll find yer book!"

He ran out of the house with a determined look on his face.

---

Canterlot

Celestia was sitting on her throne.

All of a sudden, a letter came up to her.

She read the letter.

She smiled. "Luna?"

"Yes sister?" Luna said as she appeared.

"Mark says hi and thank you for everything."

Luna let out a shy smile. "Oh...um..."

Celestia let out a small chuckle. "I'll tell him you said you're welcome. He also said that he wished to repay us somehow."

Celestia put a hoof on her chin. "I have an idea..."

Cotton made up a list.

"Let's see...Rainbow Dash called Twilight an egghead, so she's a suspect. Pinkie Pie confuses Twilight, so she's a suspect. Rarity...eh...she's looks suspicious, thanks to her fancy manners. As for Applejack...um...well, she never takes Breaking Dawn seriously so she's on mah list. And for Fluttershy...well, sometimes the most innocent is the most dangerous."

Cotton smiled. "I have mah list. Now, to find a way to squeeze the truth..."

---

Mark's House

Mark was reading the book that he "borrowed" from Twilight.

All of a sudden, he heard some knocking on the door.

He opened the door and smiled. "Hey Derpy."

"Hey Mark. Got a letter." Derpy said as she gave him a letter.

"Thanks. Tell Dinky I said hi!"

Mark opened the envelope.

"Huh. It's a letter from...Celestia?"

Mark sat down as he read the letter.

Dear Mark,

You're welcome. It was an honor. Also, it's good to hear that Twilight and her friends still accept you.

Yours Truly,

Princess Celestia

Mark dropped his jaw as he read:

P.S.

Oh and there is a way you can personally thank me and Luna for giving a home for your friends. In five days, Luna will have a personal day off for herself. Do you mind watching after her that day?

Mark carefully reread the last part.

All of a sudden, he let out a giant "YES!" as he fell to the ground laughing and crying.

---

"Alright Rarity." Cotton said with a stern look. "Just confess, and all's will go well. Did ya take the book?"

Rarity started to whimper.

"I'm not gonna ask ya again," Cotton said with a furious look on his face. "Did ya steal Twilight's magic book?-!"

Rarity shook her head vigorously.

Without hesitating, Cotton started to tear Rarity's dresses, while she was tied to a chair and is forced to watch.

"No please stop! I didn't take it!"

Not believing her, he completely teared her new dress to shreds.

"Noooo!-!-!-!-!-!"

She soon passes out.

"I believe ya." Cotton said happily as he untied her.

"Let's see...who's next...Ah! I know..."

---

Fluttershy whimpered.

"PLEASE! DON'T DO IT!-!-!-!"

Cotton just yawned as he tightened Angel with his arms.

"PLEASE!-! PLEASE!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!"

"Then confess."

"BUT I DIDN'T TAKE TWILIGHT'S...!"

Cotton immediately bit off Angel's head off, red ooze coming out of Angel's neck and head.

Fluttershy screamed and collapsed, crying.

Cotton stared at her. "Well she didn't do it." He said to himself. "Hey Flutters. Stop crying. It wasn't even Angel. It's just a cake sculpture version of him. See? The blood's actually strawberry jam."

Fluttershy couldn't hear Cotton over her sobbing.

Cotton sighed. "Whatever."

He walked outside and approached Angel, who was tied up and gagged.

"The good news is yer being freed." Cotton said with a friendly smile.

Angel let out a relieved sigh.

"The bad news is that I asked Mr. Kahn to do it." Cotton said as his smile slowly turned to an evil grin.

Angel's eyes widen as Cotton left, chuckling.

---

"Hey Pinks. Thanks again for that Angel sculpture." Cotton said with a smile.

"No problemo." Pinkie Pie replied with a smile.

"Kinda makes me sad for doing dis to ya." Cotton said as he took out electric hand mixer and showed it to the tied up Pinkie Pie, who was, regardless of the situation she was in, smiling happily.

"Feel free to confess to me any time." Cotton said.

Cotton then turned the mixer on and shoved it on Pinkie's mane.

Despite the pain, Pinkie started giggling.

"Damn it Pinkie!" Cotton shouted as he took out the mixer from her mane."Yer girly mane done burned the motor! I'm gonna get the chocolate cake mix."

"YAY!"

After a half-hour of chocolate cake mix, a vacuum cleaner, and 20 cupcakes, Cotton gave up. Mostly because Pinkie seemed to enjoy the experience.

"OK." Cotton said as he panted heavily. "Ya didn't take it."

Cotton thought about who should he torture next.

"Hey Pinks. I heard ya go dis thing that let's ya fly. I need to go pay somepony a visit."

---

"DON'T. DO. IT."

Rainbow Dash gave Cotton a death glare.

Cotton just smirked and lit a match and walked up to a pile of Daring Do books.

"Don't think I'm scared to do this..." Cotton said quietly. "When mah boy and his friends got that new couch that was eventually stolen by Bill...I didn't think twice about throwing a match like this at the couch..."

"IF YOU WANNA LIVE," Rainbow Dash whispered as a serial killer would whisper to his victim, "DON'T BURN THEM..."

"The Japanese blew mah shins off. What are YOU gonna do?"

"DO NOT.."

"Oops." Cotton said with a smile as he dropped the match on top of the books.

Rainbow Dash let out a horrified scream and immediately formed a raincloud and let out rain on the books.

"Well. Yer innocent. That could only mean one thing..."

---

"Dag-nab-it Cotton!"

Applejack gave out a scowl.

Cotton just smirked as he waved Applejack's hat over a goat pen.

"Ya know how much I love that hat!" Applejack yelled.

"Exactly. Ya like that hat as much as Bloom loves her bow." Cotton said as he took out AppleBloom's red bow.

Applejack growled.

"Oh? And what's this? Could it be Big Macintosh's favorite doll, Smarty Pants?" Cotton said as he took out an ugly doll.

"DO NOT DO IT."

"Confess if ya value these things."

"I DID NOT...!"

"Chow time boys!" Cotton shouted as he threw the hat, doll, and bow in the goat pen.

Applejack screamed as the goats chewed on the hat, doll, and bow.

Cotton sighed and frowned. "Well, ya didn't do it...then who...?"

---

Twilight's House

Dale just simply crossed his arms as the Mane 6 started talking.

"Cotton's gone outta control!" Applejack shouted with an angry look on her face.

"Those were limited editions of Daring Do!" Rainbow Dash yelled.

"That dress cost a lot of gems!" Rarity yelled. Dried tears near her eyes were visible.

"He could have hurt Angel!" Fluttershy whispered loudly.

"I like how he got himself a whip." Pinkie Pie said with a smile.

Dale simply walked inside the closet.

"For some reason, all the girls think you did these things to them." Dale said as he lit his cigarette, lighting the dark closet and revealing Cotton.

Cotton narrowed his eyes and tightened his whip.

"Cuz I DID those things to 'em." Cotton hissed.

"Wait what?" Dale said with a surprised face.

"Clearly, I was wrong. They are guilty!" Cotton growled.

"I say we use that whip on him!" Rainbow Dash shouted.

That was enough for Cotton to hear.

"HALT!-!" Cotton shouted in a great voice as he bursted through the door. "ALL OF YOUSE ARE UNDER ARREST FOR LYING AND THREATENING A SHERIFF!-!-!-!"

"Lying?" Twilight asked.

"I thoughts they didn't stole yer book." Cotton said as he twitched his eye. "But clearly I was wrong. Thus, one of them DID STOLE YER BOOK!-! WHICH ONE OF YA HORS...oh hey Mark."

Mark froze. The girls looked at Mark. He had snuck in and was going to place a book on Twilight's table then leave.

"HEY!" Twilight shouted as she pointed at the book. "That's my book!"

Cotton blinked. "MARK?-! Yer the prime suspect?-!-?-!"

Mark sighed and bowed his head in shame. "Yeah. It was me. I thought Twilight didn't mind so...I kinda took it without noticing...sorry Twilight."

Twilight's angry look went away. "That's OK. Just ask next time. OK?" She said with a smile

Mark smiled back. "Thanks."

Rainbow Dash glared at Cotton. "So that means that you tortured us for nothing...?"

Soon the rest of the Mane 6 all glared at Cotton.

Cotton gulped. He had two choices. He could either apologize. Or...

"See ya."

Cotton immediately ran out of the door and as far away from Twilight's house.

Dale came out of the closet. "Anypony feeling deja vu? Or it's just probably me. I'm surprised that Kahn wasn't the one who did it."

Boomhauer walked in.

Everypony was shocked to see that he was covered his bruises and bandages.

"Oh god." Dale said. "What happened to ya."

"Well." Boomhauer said as he gave an angry frown. "Let's just goddang say that it was git old men who dang ol' fall over heels for god dang Berry, Carrot, and Colgate and a, I tell ya what, a VERY BAD COP...yo."

It's been two days since Cotton tortured the Mane 6.

Thankfully, for Mark, Twilight didn't ask him why he took the book in the first place.

Boomhauer was recovering from his wounds from the stallions who beat up Boomhauer.

Cotton avoided the Mane 6 for a while before things cooled down.

---

Bobby sighed as he took a walk around town.

"This place is great and all, but I'd love it if something interesting happening." He said. "I wonder what Pinkie's doing?"

He walked over to the Sugar Cube Corner when he suddenly heard a noise.

"Huh." He said to himself. "Sounds like it's from that dumpster next to that bakery place."

He walked over there and heard some rumbling.

"OK..." Bobby said as he stared at the dumpster.

"Wait. Why am I staring at a dumpster?"

Bobby shook his head and turned around.

Just then, he heard a noise in the dumpster.

"Huh." Bobby said. "Just a raccoon."

He turned around and saw a raccoon.

The raccoon started sniffing Bobby and then stared at him.

Bobby smiled and patted the raccoon's head.

"Hey there little fella." He said. "Huh. You look familiar."

He put a hoof on his chin. He dropped his jaw when he realized who this raccoon really was.

"Bandit?"

---

The next day

Sweet Apple Acres

Hank, Dale, Bill, Boomhauer, and Ben were standing near a fence, drinking beer.

"This is nice." Ben said with a smile.

"You think Big Macintosh would like beer?" Dale asked. "I'm not sure. Man, I seen Fluttershy become a vampire but I've never seen Big Mac get drunk."

"Hey y'all." A glum Applejack said.

The guys turned to Applejack, who wasn't wearing her hat.

"Where's your hat, Miss Applejack?" Ben asked.

Applejack couldn't help but let out a smile. "Please. Ya don't have to call me Miss." She said as her frown returned. "Anyway, it's Cotton."

Ben nodded. "Ah yes. I heard about that." He turned to Hank. "Is your dad always like this?"

Hank sighed. "You don't know."

"Speak of the dang ol' devil man." Boomhauer said as his friends saw Cotton and Bobby walking by.

"Morning gentlemen." Cotton greeted "Hey Apples."

Applejack just rolled her eyes.

"Ah don't worry about it." Cotton said with a small smile. "You'll get used to not wearing a hat. Ask Four-Eyes there. He was got a hat from a woman who turned out to be a hooker. Be lucky that I didn't burn yer hat like I did with Little Miss New York."

Applejack and Hank gritted their teeth.

"Stop calling me that dad." Hank muttered.

Bill smiled as he reached for his cooler. "Alright. Who wants a cold-AHHHH!-!-!-!"

Bill screamed as he saw a raccoon inside the cooler. He fell down to the ground.

Everypony had shocked faces and backed up a bit when they saw the rodent.

"BANDIT!" Bobby shouted.

Hank was about to throw his beer can at the raccoon but then stopped himself from doing that. He would never thrown out beer. Even for a grass fire.

"Get outta here, you furry bastard!" Hank shouted as he threw some small rocks at the raccoon.

The raccoon dodged the rocks and ran up to Dale, biting him in the leg.

Dale screamed as the raccoon ran to the forest.

Bobby bit his lip. "Oh. So that's where Bandit was."

Hank blinked. "Bandit? You mean that raccoon of yours back on earth?"

Dale widen his eyes. "Bandit...that name...Of course! That raccoon with..."

Dale twitched. "R...a...b...i...e...s..."

Hank bit his lip. "Oh God. Not this again..."

"YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!-!-!"

Dale immediately ran to the Everfree Forest.

Applejack was shocked. "What the hay was that about?-!"

Hank sighed. "Dale thinks he has rabies. One time, when he thought he had them, he became paranoid from the rabies shots."

Cotton looked at the Everfree Forest.

"Man. This story's taking place more in that forest." Cotton muttered to himself.

Ben sighed. "So we have to find Mr. Gribble, huh?"

Hank sighed. "I guess so. Four of us has to go there."

He glared at Bill and Boomhauer. "And you can't come because last time we searched for Dale, you were at the GODDAMN WATERHOLE."

Bill and Boomhauer smiled nervously.

Bobby let out a scared face. "Don't tell me you're gonna...kill Bandit...?"

Hank just stared at Bobby. "We're just gonna find Gribble. That's all."

Ben walked up. "I'll volunteer. But I won't kill the raccoon."

Cotton sighed. "I guess I could help too. Maybe Mark would like to help too."

---

Eventually, Hank, Cotton, Mark, and Ben all stood in front of the Everfree Forest. They had backpacks on them, which were filled with supplies. Ben brought his pole just in case.

The Mane Six, Bill, Dale, Boomhauer, and Bobby stood next to them.

"Please make sure you don't hurt Dale." Rainbow Dash said.

"Or Bandit." Bobby and Fluttershy added.

Hank sighed. "I'll do my best not to kill Bandit. I'm more concerned about Dale."

"Reminds me of old times, huh Cotton?" Mark said with a smile.

Cotton smirked. "You may have killed those Tojos like it was nothing, but it's nothing compared to me."

Ben chuckled. "I finally get to see Mark in combat."

"Alright." Hank said. "Let's go find Dale."

Hank, Cotton, Mark, and Ben walked in the heart of the forest.

Cotton gritted his teeth. "Things are gonna get really awkward if Mark's 'friends' show up." He said to himself.

"I wonder if I'll meet Hunter again..." Mark said to himself.

"Let's split up." Hank suggested. "Dad, you come with me."

Everypony nodded. Hank and Cotton walked away.

Now, it was just Ben and Mark.

As they walked, Mark coughed lighty.

"So..." Mark said, wanting to start a conversation. "You have a sister, right?"

Ben nodded. "Yeah. Her name's Melia Long. Sweet thing. Ever since my parents got divorced, I always took care of her. And then Dylan Sawyer came to the picture."

Mark raised an eyebrow. "Her boyfriend?"

"Her husband. I met him and, in my opinion, I think she could do better. Nevertheless, if she's happy, then I'm happy. And being around Dylan is making her happy."

"So, what's it like being an uncle, now that your sister has a child?"

"It feels...good." Ben replied as he put out a prideful smile.

Mark smiled. "You had someone to love. Unlike me..."

Ben frowned. "What do you mean?"

Mark sighed. "I dunno if you wanna hear it..."

Ben put a hoof on Mark's shoulder. "I've heard worse." He said with a smile smile.

Mark let out a small smile. As his smile faded away, he explained about his friends and what happened in the past.

Ben's eyes widen, but he smiled and patted Mark's back.

"Don't worry. I'm sure they forgive you."

Mark let out a relieved smile and hugged Ben. "Thanks Ben."

Ben smirked as he hugged back Mark. "No problem. By the way, you like Luna, do you?"

Mark widen his eyes and took a big step away from Ben.

"How the hell did you...?-!"

Ben laughed. "I have my ways Mark. Besides, Twilight told me about that time you stole that book and Cotton told me about you and Luna."

"BORROW." Mark said with a frown. "Not stole."

Ben shook his head.

All of a sudden, they both heard a jungle cry.

---

Hank and Cotton widen their eyes.

"Gribble." They said at the same time.

They ran to the source of the cry and found all these messages written on the trees.

GO BACK

TURN BACK

NO HOPE

GOVERNMENT WILL KILL YOU

DAMN DIAMOND TIARA AND SILVER SPOON

EAT ME SURI POLOMARE

ROCK ON COCO POMMEL

CHEESE SANDWICH IS BEST PONY

DISCORD IS BEST VILLIAN

KKMAN57 FOREVER

RARITY AND RAINBOW DASH RULES

WHAT ARE THE KEYS FOR THAT BOX?-!

WOW. SO MUCH SUSPENSE. MUCH DANGER. (SORRY. COULD NOT RESIST)

"What the..." Cotton said with a raised eyebrow.

All of a sudden, Dale kicked Cotton in the head, knocking him out.

Dale let out a roar as Hank had a shocked face.

---

Cotton then woke up.

He noticed that he and Hank are all tied up to a tree.

Dale was pointing a sharpened staff at Hank.

"Remember on earth, how I wanted to take your blood and combined it with mine in order to obtain your propane skills? Oh hey...Cotton's awake." Dale said with a disturbed smile.

Dale was covered in mud and dirt. He had scratches over his body.

"Don't worry Dad!" Hank shouted. "Mark and Ben will find us!"

Dale smirked and walked over to a tent.

He dragged Mark's and Ben's unconscious bodies and laid them next to Hank.

"We're screwed, aren't we?" Cotton said with a completely blank face.

Dale took out an electric hand mixer.

He then turned it on and shoved it in Cotton's mane.

Cotton gritted his teeth as he tried to control the pain.

After a few minutes, Dale decided to use other things, such as chocolate cake mix, a vacuum cleaner, 20 cupcakes, 20 muffins, and a scepter.

Eventually, fifteen minutes passed by.

"Well. That was fun." Dale said with a smile.

"Ya are gonna regret the day youse were born Gribble." Cotton whispered.

"Oh and by the way." Dale said with a grin. "You girls can come out now."

Cotton dropped his jaw as the Mane 6 appeared. All of them had smirks on their faces.

Mark and Ben started laughing as Hank was being untied by Bill and Boomhauer.

"What the hell...?" Cotton said with raised eyebrows.

Rainbow Dash smirked. "That's for my Daring Do books.

"And my dress." Rarity added.

"And my hat, Big Mac's doll, and Bloom's bow." Applejack added.

"And for Angel." Fluttershy added.

"And for goddang being a dang ol' bad cop. Whatcha gonna do when they come for ya." Boomhauer muttered.

Cotton stared at Boomhauer. "Hey, next time, keep your wee-wee away from the ladies, OK?"

Boomhauer just walked over and kicked Cotton in the shins.

Mark and Ben started to untie Cotton.

"Sorry Cotton." Mark said. "Couldn't resist."

Cotton shook his head. "What about that raccoon thing?"

"You mean Bandit?" Bobby said as he appeared with Bandit on his back.

"You see." Twilight explained. "The girls wanted payback for what you did to them. So we got an idea. Bobby found this raccoon he used to had back on earth. It turns out he's also in Equestria. Fluttershy found out that Bandit doesn't have rabies. Dale and Hank also told us about that rabies incident. So we decided to recreate that and end up torturing YOU."

Cotton just dropped his jaw. "They gots me." He thought to himself. "Well...I guess I deserves it."

Cotton chuckled for a bit. "Touché girls. Touché everypony.

---

As everypony laughed, two ponies hidden in the shadows of the trees blinked.

"Wow." An adult stallion muttered.

"That was unexpected." A young colt said with a smile.

The adult stallion smirked and shook his head. "Come on. We should tell Hunter about this."

The colt nodded. "Good idea."

The ponies soon disappeared.

Two days later

Cotton woke up from his bed.

Cotton was mad at the Mane 6 and Hank's friends but he immediately let it go.

Bobby let Bandit stay at Fluttershy's cottage.

As he yawned, he got up and stared at the clock.

"Eh. Got time for a walk."

He wanted to hang out with Mark, but he knew that Mark was going at Canterlot to 'hang out' with Luna.

"Careful Mark." Cotton muttered. "Ya know how much I don't trust royalty."

As he opened his door, he went into G.H.'s room, which was empty.

He turned around and saw Tilly.

"Tilly!" Cotton shouted. "Where's G.H.?-!"

"He's at the train station." Tilly answered.

Cotton shrugged. "Alright."

As he left the house, his eyes widen. "Crap. That's right. Babs's coming to stay here."

He shrugged and smiled. "Eh. Might as well go there mahself."

---

Train Station

Cotton walked to the station and saw Applejack, the Crusaders, G.H., and Gracie.

G.H. smiled. "Hey dad."

Cotton smiled and waved. "Hey son."

Gracie waved. "Hi Uncle Hill."

Cotton grunted. "Just call me Cotton."

AppleBloom jumped around. "I still can't believe that Babs is coming to visit!"

Just then, the train arrived.

Babs Seed was the first one to come out of the train.

"BABS!" The Crusaders shouted as they jumped on top of Babs.

Babs smiled and hugged them. "Good to see you girls."

"Hey Cotton!"

Cotton turned around and saw Ben running towards Cotton.

"Hank says that he needs to see you and Applejack NOW." Ben said as he panted.

Cotton rolled his eyes. "Fine. I'll do what Hankie Wankie wants."

"Girls, make sure you take care of Babs." Applejack said as she and Cotton left with Ben.

"Babs, I want you to meet our new friends." Scootaloo said as she pointed to G.H. and Gracie.

"Hi. I'm Gracie. This is my cousin, Good Hank, or G.H."

G.H. smiled nervously. "Hey..."

Babs stared at him and also smiled nervously. "Um...hi..." She said.

"She kinda looks cute." G.H. thought.

"He kinda looks cute." Babs thought.

---

Canterlot

Mark got off the train.

He let out a big breath.

"Alright Mark." He whispered. "Nothing to worry about. Just meeting a girl. That's it. Hang out with somepony."

"Whom you have a crush on and is a princess."

"Shut up inner voice." Mark muttered. "Oh great. I'm talking to myself."

He walked towards the castle.

Two guards stood next to the entrance.

"Halt. What is your purpose here?"

Mark sighed. "I'm...um..."

"It's OK." Luna said to the guards. "I invited him."

Mark suddenly breathed a bit faster just when he saw Luna.

"Hello Mark." Luna said with a smile.

Mark nervously waved. "...hey." He said with a smile.

"This is gonna be long day."

"Indeed it is."

"Shut the f&%k up inner voice. Oh God why am I still thinking to myself?"

---

"Alright." Cotton muttered. "There's Hank. Huh. His friends and Mr. Kahn's there too."

"So are the girls." Applejack said with a raised eyebrow."

Cotton walked towards Hank who was near Twilight's library.

"Alrighty Hank." Cotton said. "What do ya want?"

Hank blinked. "What do you mean?"

Cotton growled. "Ya called me?"

Hank shook his head. "I thought you called me and my friends...and Kahn."

Cotton blinked and stared at Ben.

Ben shrugged. "Hank told me to call for you."

"Indeed I did."

Everypony was shocked by Hank's voice that came out of nowhere.

"Doppelgänger?" Ben guessed.

All of a sudden, a draconequus suddenly appeared in front of everypony.

"You mispronounced Discord." The draconequus said in Hank's voice.

"DISCORD!-!-!-!" Twilight, Fluttershy, and Dale shouted at the same time.

Discord took out a hat out of Dale's ear. "Eeeeeyup." He said in a hillbilly tone.

Dale let out a weak, hearty laughter. "I finally met Discorrrr..." he muttered weakly as he fainted humorously.

Discord laughed. "Finally, a fan."

"What do you want Discord?" Rainbow Dash asked.

Discord let out a sad face. "I can't meet your Earth friends?" He said as he took out a tissue from Kahn's ear and blowed his nose on it.

"Wait. You know they're from...?"

"Indeed I do Twily!" Discord shouted as his sad face literally turned upside down. "Two ways. One, Fluttershy."

Fluttershy nodded. "I send him a letter about Cotton and his Earth friends."

"And the second?" Twilight asked.

Discord took out a box out of nowhere and placed it on the ground, in front of everypony.

"Pre-goddang I tell ya what-senting!" Discord said as he turned into Boomhauer.

"THE PUPILS OF DISCORD!"

He kicked the box, which made the side of the box fall on the ground.

Immediately, six ponies ran out of the box, gasping for air.

"Please don't ever do that Mr. Discord." A light brown unicorn with white mane and a pen Cutie Mark muttered as he tried to breathe.

Hank's eyes were as wide as dinner plates. "TWIG BOY?-!"

"Anthony Page." Discord corrected.

"Indeed. You surely must learn some manners Hank Hill." A dark brown unicorn with pink mane and a wine glass Cutie Mark commented.

Bill gasped. "GILBERT?-!"

"Wait. That's how you say it?" A cyan pegasus with red mane and a hammer Cutie Mark said. "Man, I've been mispronouncing it since day one."

Dale suddenly woke up and dropped his ears. "R-R-RUSTY SHACKLEFORD?"

A pegasus who looked like Boomhauer, with the exception of his yellow mane and sunglasses Cutie Mark, noticed Rarity and smiled.

"Hey man, I tell you what, how 'bout you and me go BOW-CHICKA-WAH-WAH, yo."

"DANG OL' PATCH BOOMHAUER?-!" Boomhauer shouted.

"Ugh." Rarity muttered. "You may look handsome but you obviously do not know any manners."

An Earth Pony who looked like Kahn, except for his black and neon red mane and lightning bolt Cutie Mark, chuckled.

"I said it once and I'll say it again. You sound like freaking Brad Pitt."

Kahn dropped his jaw. "PHONSAWAN?-!"

Hank and his friends looked at Kahn.

Kahn rolled his eyes. "My nephew...remember?"

"Hey!" Phonsawan said as he pointed at Dale. "I know you! You that dude who kept calling me time-traveler alien thing."

Dale widen his eyes. "You're that time-traveler!"

Phonsawan put a hoof on his forehead. "I'm not a goddamn time traveler!"

"But...that alien language..."

"IT'S F&%KING LAOTIAN!"

Kahn winced. "Jesus Phonsawan! Watch your damn mouth!"

A blue Earth pony with a messy orange mane or tail and a calculator Cutie Mark stomped on the ground.

"What about me!" He shouted.

Hank blinked. "Jimmy? Jimmy Wichard?"

Jimmy nodded and pointed to himself. "That's right. I'm Jimmy. I work at the race track. I was once in a gun club. I smash cans. I create propane art. I conned a con man. I CONNED HIM GOOD!-!-!"

"OK..." Rainbow Dash said.

"OK?-! What's that suppose to mean! Take it back! TAKE IT BACK!-!" He said as he started to charge at Rainbow Dash.

"Now now Jimmy." Discord said as he stopped Jimmy. "I'll let you smash some cans and bottles..."

Jimmy immediately sat down like a behaving child.

The Mane 6 blinked.

Discord chuckled. "Guess that's what happens when you stare at the sun too long."

Hank and his friends scratched the backs of their heads.

"I can't believe Twig Boy, Gilbert, the REAL Rusty, Patch, Jimmy, and Pho...Kahn's nephew is here." Hank muttered.

Cotton let out a glare.

"I can't believe it." He thought. "I JUST CANNOT BELIEVE IT! How can mah friends and family not see this! That's it. It's time to do what I should have done back on Earth...time to kill Discord...or should I say...FIDEL CASTRO!-!-!-!-!-!"

A pony wearing a robe hid in the shadows of the trees.

He took out a book and started writing.

It's been a week or something since that unfortunate day

I am forever an outcast...

Why? People ask.

Please, heed my story on what really happened...

...on Earth.

I was once a happy teenager.

I had a loving father, and yet no mother or brothers or sisters.

All was well...until one night...my father accidentally killed himself.

I went to my neighbors and told them about this...

But...

But...

The pony started crying.

They accused me of such murder.

It was too late.

I became wanted.

No one trusted me.

I was an outcast...or...a troll...as they called it on the internet. Heh.

The pony let out a ragged sigh.

Eventually, the world ended and I was sent to Equestria...

I could have started my new life...

But I didn't...

Because...

The pony couldn't control his tears.

What if they were right?

What if I am an outcast?

An outcast!

AN OUTCAST!

AN OUTCAST!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!-!

AN OUT...

The pony dropped the book as he fell to the ground, laying in his pool of tears as he wept.

Cotton shook his head in disgust.

"I just can't believe that Castro's alive." He whispered.

"So let me get this straight." Dale said to Phonsawan. "You're not a time-traveler. You're just Kahn's nephew and your alien language was really Laotian and that time machine was just a modified Toyota Supra and that time-traveling year was just military time?"

"Correct." Phonsawan said with a glare.

"Do you have a nickname or something Phon...um..." Hank asked.

"Phonsawan, you dumb hillbilly." Phonsawan and Kahn said at the same time.

"If you MUST call me something else." Phonsawan muttered. "Neon Dash would be alright."

"Hey!" Rainbow Dash shouted as she pointed to Phonsawan. "You stole my last name!"

Patch smiled. "Hey missy ol' girl you look like dang o' I'm sexy and I know it yo, I tell you what."

Boomhauer sighed. "Damnit Patch you gotta um learn some goddang self-damn-control man yo git."

"I must admit." Gilbert confessed. "He really is a handsome man." He said as he put his arm around Patch's neck, freaking out Patch.

"Are you...um..." Rainbow Dash asked.

"He's gay." Cotton blurted out. Everypony stared at Cotton then Gilbert.

"What?" Gilbert said calmly with a smile. "He isn't lying."

"So he's attracted to...stallions? Not mares?" Applejack asked.

"Correct miss." Gilbert answered.

Applejack let out an evil smirk. "You should meet my big brother, Big Macintosh..."

Gilbert's smile widen. "I'm listening..."

Rusty rolled his eyes. "Get a room."

"So you know Dale?" Rainbow Dash asked Rusty.

"Yeah. He stole my identity."

"For the last time, I thought you were dead!" Dale shouted.

Rusty sighed.

Rainbow Dash stared at Dale. "I dunno. Rusty Shackledford doesn't fit you."

"I know the name of a ten-year-old German who died during WWI. His name kinda fits me."

"I'm sorry. Can I change the subject?" Anthony Page asked. "Can I ask why this man is not in jail for being an abusive father?" He asked as he pointed to Hank.

Hank's eye twitched. "I'm gonna kick your ass!"

"Flank." Dale corrected.

"Shouldn't it be rump?" Bill asked.

Dale stared at Bill.

After some thinking, Dale dropped his jaw.

"All this time...I thought it was flank...DAMN YOU DIAMOND TIARA AND SILVER SPOON!-!-!-!-!" Dale shouted.

For some reason, Jimmy also joined Dale. "GO TO HELL DAY-MOND TERRY AND SIL-PURR POO!-!-!-!-!"

Bill couldn't stop giggling.

Discord smiled. "This is why I like my pupils."

"I'm sorry." Twilight interrupted. "Explain how you got them."

"Well." Discord said as he took out a monocle and put it on his eye. "When goody old Earth ended, these six entered into Equestria. I know about this but I was focused on Hank, Dale, Bill, Boomhauer, Cotton, and Kahn Sulfer-Noofer-Phone."

"I am gonna kick your ass." Kahn whispered as he gritted his teeth.

"As I was saying." Discord said as he got a fake mustache and put in on his upper lip. "I wanted to make my own Hank, Dale, Bill, Boomhauer, Cotton, and Kahn gang. So, taking the people who are related to them, I gots the Pupils of Discord: Antony, Gilbert, Rusty, Patch, Jimmy, and Phone-Shawn-Wah."

"You must be sh*ting me..." Phonsawan muttered as he shook his head.

"No interruptions please." Discord says as he got a pair on sunglasses and put it on. "Their job is to explore wacky adventures and be yourselves."

"YEAH!-!-!-!" Jimmy shouted from the top of his lungs. "SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH! SMASH!..."

Everypony just stared at Jimmy.

"How long did he stare at that sun?" Twilight asked.

---

Mark bit his lip as he walked with Luna in the garden near the castle.

"OK. Just be cool."

"I wonder what you'll name your children with her."

"Go to hell, inner voice."

"You gotta love me."

"Lovely garden. Don't you think Mark?"

Mark let out a stupid smile. "Yes it is Your Highness."

"Please. Call me Luna. Are you OK? You look like something's troubling you."

"Wait. Is it Mark Luna, or Luna Walsh when you get married? Mark, what do you think?"

"When I get home, I'm gonna drink all that booze I have until your ass is dead inner voice."

"I'm shutting up now."

"Oh. It's nothing." Mark replied to Luna.

"You don't have have to be nervous around me." Luna said with a friendly smile. "Just be yourself."

"Mark and Luna sitting in a tree..."

"Did you know that there's vodka in Equestria?"

"Sorry. Shutting up now."

"Oh. OK. Thanks." Mark said with a happy smile.

"I heard that Kenny Walsh, your uncle, is doing fine." Luna said.

"You know my Uncle?" Mark said with a surprised look.

"He's one of our best Royal Guards. I can understand, since you were in the army in World War II."

"How did you I was in W...oh right. Celestia. Forgot about that."

Luna sat down in a bench. "Do you mind telling me a story back when you were in the army.

Mark sat down. "That was a long time. But I think I remember one story..."

---

Cutie Mark Clubhouse

"So what should we do today?" AppleBloom asked her friends.

"Try to get our Cutie Marks?" Babs suggested.

"Maybe not today." Sweetie Belle asked. "We got banned from that bowling alley AND the video arcade in the same day."

"How about a game?" Gracie suggested.

Everypony except G.H. nodded.

G.H. rolled his eyes. "Make it an interesting game."

"Truth or dare?" Scootaloo suggested.

"Fine." G.H. muttered.

"I'll go first!" Scootaloo shouted. "Sweetie Belle, truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Do you have a crush on Button Mash?"

"What?-! No! I don't hate him...but I don't have a crush on him."

"Oh. I wonder what Mr. Gribble was writing on that time he went nuts..."

"My turn!" Sweetie Belle shouted. "Gracie, truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"What was the worst thing you did to your Uncle Hank?"

"Simple. I drain propane from one of his tanks on his lawn. He wouldn't talk to me for a week."

"Let's see," Gracie wondered. "Babs Seed, truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"What was the worst thing you ever did in your entire..."

"Team up with Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon."

"Oh yeah...sorry."

"None taken." Babs Seed replied. "AppleBloom truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Have you ever kissed somepony?"

"Umm...nope."

G.H. laughed. "Oh come on! You girls just keep on picking truth! Why not any dares?-!"

"Alright..." AppleBloom muttered. "Truth or dare Good Hank?"

"DARE! Gimme your worse dare you got!"

"I dare you to kiss Babs for 10 seconds."

Everypony gasped.

"Anything but that..." G.H. thought.

"What's wrong?" AppleBloom asked with a smirk. "Chicken?"

"HEY!"

"Oops. Sorry Scootaloo."

Babs blushed. G.H. took a deep breath.

"10 seconds right?...No problem."

Gracie gasped. "He's gonna do it."

Babs bit her lip.

G.H. moved next to Babs. "10 seconds and that's it. Nopony ever has to find out about this..."

Babs shook her head. "I'm sorry but..."

"Dang it! I will not be ridiculed as a chicken!" G.H. shouted as he quickly put his lips on Babs' lips.

Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Gracie dropped their jaws.

Babs' eyes widen. Many thoughts went into her head.

None of them unpleasant.

After 10 seconds, G.H. stopped kissing her.

"THERE! I'M DONE! MY TURN!"

"That was..." Babs thought as she just blinked. "Wonderful...what?"

---

"And that's the story of Jimmy." Discord finished with a smile.

Everypony dropped their jaws.

"Jimmy is an even worse version of Pinkie Pie." Rainbow Dash muttered while shaking her head.

"So what now?" Dale asked.

"Well," Discord said as he took out a briefcase and a Hawaiian shirt. "We're gonna stay over for a bit! Anthony can stay over with Twily, Rusty can stay over with Rainbow, Gilbert can stay over with AJ, Jimmy can stay over with Pinks, Ph-Neon Dash can stay over with Fluttershy, and Patch can stay over with Rarity."

"At least you called me Neon Dash..." Phonsawan muttered.

Applejack smiled deviously. "Big Macintosh can't wait to see you..."

Anthony adjusted his glasses he had on. "Maybe I can get the purple unicorn's opinion on Mr. Hill."

Pinkie looked at Jimmy. Jimmy let out a stupid smile. Pinkie returned the stupid smile.

Patch winked at Rarity, turning the white unicorn into a blushing red unicorn.

Rusty just waved at Rainbow Dash. "Umm...hi."

"Hey." Rainbow Dash blankly replied.

Cotton smiled. "Castro's staying with Flutters huh? Now is the perfect time..."

Canterlot

"And that's how I learned how to survive in the jungle for three days." Mark said as he finished his story.

Luna had a surprised look on her face. "Lovely story Mark." Dhe said as she let out a kind smile.

Mark chuckled. "Thanks. Though it was kinda disgusting now that I mentioned it."

Luna placed a hoof on Mark's hoof.

Immediately, Mark started to sweat.

"Oh god...she's touching my hand...er...hoof...oh god...oh god..."

"I wo-"

"Beer."

"Oops."

"Oh god, the pony I have a crush on is touching my hoof!"

"Are you OK Mark?"

Immediately, Mark snapped back to reality.

"Oh yeah. I'm cool, thanks." Mark said with a smile.

Luna got up from the bench. "Well, I think it's time you should go back to Ponyville. Thank you for spending some time with me."

"You're welcome Luna." Mark said as he got up from the bench. "Always a pleasure. Well, I'll see you."

As he walked away, he heard Luna say,

"Hey...Mark?"

"Yeah?" He said as he turned around.

Luna immediately placed a peck on Mark's cheek. "Thanks again." She said as she walked away smiling.

Mark stood there.

His eye was twitching. His head was sweating. His legs were shaking.

With a happy smile, he fell to the ground.

"There is no way in hell I'm cleaning this cheek." He said dreamily as he softly put his hoof on the cheek Luna kissed on.

Both Luna and Mark didn't know that Celestia was watching them from a window.

Celestia smiled at this touching scene.

---

Twilight's Library

"I'm sorry, what is it that you wanted to know again?" Twilight asked.

"Do you notice any aggressive signs from Mr. Hill when he is around children under 12 years old?" Anthony replied.

"I'm sorry, but I don't see Hank as...aggressive around children."

"Looks can be deceiving Mrs. Sparkle."

Twilight blushed. "I'm not married."

"Ooh. Apologies."

Hank sighed. "This is a waste of..."

"Hank please. Just let Mr. Page talk, please?"

Hank wanted to argue but saw Twilight's concerned face.

"Oh alright..." Hank muttered.

"Well," Anthony said as he wrote down something in his notepad, "As I was saying..."

---

Rainbow Dash's House

"So that's the story about me, Dale, and this identity theft thing." Rusty finished.

"Huh. I dunno." Rainbow Dash said with a shrug. "Dale doesn't seem to be a Rusty. He seems more like a...I dunno."

"Eh. Sometimes I thought about changing my name. Someone confused me for someone who bought something radioactive and accidentally left it in the garbage bin."

Rainbow Dash blinked.

Rusty chuckled lightly. "Long story."

Rusty looked around. "Nice home."

Rainbow Dash smirked. "Thanks. You're alright Rusty."

Rusty smiled to himself. "You too Dash." He thought as his smile grew larger. "You too..."

---

Sugar Cube Corner

The Cakes and Pinkie Pie just stared at Jimmy.

He was sloppily eating cupcakes, practically shoving them into his face.

"Hey! These are some good food! Kinda like momma made it! Now that you mention it, I don't know my momma! Also, I'm goddamn Jimmy! I work at the race track! I'm Doctor Jimmy! Wichard! I conned a con man!-! I CONNED HIM GOOD! GOOD! GOOD! GOOD! GOOD! GOOD! GOO-"

He dropped his face on the cupcakes, staining his face with icing.

As he idiotically snored, Mr. Cake asked Pinkie Pie,

"How long did you say he stared at that sun?"

---

Carousel Boutique

"Now hold still Patch." Rarity said as she finished putting on a tuxedo on Patch.

"Come on baby girl yo," Patch begged. "This is dang ol' boring! Let's, I tell ya what, go into your bedroom and yo dang ol' check my oil, ya know what I'm saying?"

Rarity blushed.

"OK! All finished."

Rarity levitated a mirror to Patch.

Patch saw his reflection and smiled.

"Man I feel like a dang ol' million bucks I tell ya what man."

Rarity giggled. "Oh thank you Patch."

Patch winked at Rarity.

Rarity's whole body was a shade of red.

---

Fluttershy's Cottage

"Nice place." Phonsawan commented.

"Thank you...Fool-en-sawan?

Phonsawan smiled as he rolled his eyes. "Close, but no cigar. Just call me Neon Dash."

"Oh, OK. By the way, what do you mean by no cigar?"

Just as Phonsawan was about to explain, Angel walked up to Fluttershy and poked her leg.

"Oh, hi Angel. This is my new friend, Phonsawan."

Phonsawan grinned. "I like you already."

Angel just sticked out his tongue.

Phonsawan glared at the bunny.

"I hate you already." He muttered to Angel.

---

Sweet Apple Acres

"Well here we are!" Applejack shouted.

Gilbert whistled. "Such a lovely place Miss Applejack."

"Oh please, call me Applejack."

"Very well, Appleja-"

He stopped as he saw Big Macintosh kicking trees.

"Who...is...that...?" Gilbert whispered.

"Oh, that's mah big brother, Big Macintosh."

Gilbert couldn't stop staring at Big Macintosh.

Applejack blinked. "Don't tell me you're..."

Gilbert walked towards Big Macintosh.

He bowed. "Greetings, I am Gilbert Fontaine De la Tour D'Haute Rive...or Gilbert for short." He said with a smile.

Big Macintosh looked confused but smiled. "Howdy, I'm-"

"Big Macintosh." Gilbert interrupted. "Your sister, Applejack, told me. I say, you have the voice of an angel."

Big Macintosh let out a confused look. "Uh...thanks?"

Applejack just shook her head.

---

Late Night

Cotton was busy in his locked room.

"I'll see ya in hell Castro..." He muttered as he took a dart and put it in a cigar.

"He and his pupils are leaving town tomorrow. Now's mah chance..."

---

The next day

Train Station

"Long time no see Mark!" Cotton said as he saluted to Mark, who got off the train.

Mark saluted back. "Hey Cotton. How's it going?"

"Eh. Not much. Some weird thing called Discord came to visit. He was with some of my boy's friends' acquaintances. I may or may not thought he was Fidel Castro..."

"What made you thought that?"

"I dunno. I think it was the beard and his way of messing with people or...I honestly have no idea now."

"So what happened?"

"Tried to kill him."

"Oh wow. He dead?"

"Nope. Before he and his friends left, I tried killing him by shooting a poison dart at him. Turns out that somehow Pinkie replaced it with a foam dart, since she thought, I quote, 'You're gonna hurt somepony with that Cotton!' After some explaining and some arguing and whatnot, I was a finally convinced he was not Castro. Though I still don't trust that...whatever the hell species he is."

"Heh. I missed a good day. Oh well."

"So how was your date with the Princess?"

"It is not a date. But I'll tell you how it went..."

---

"Wow. They made that old pony get a mixer on his hair?" Hunter said as he shook his head.

"I know right?" The adult stallion and the colt said with a smirk.

Hunter chuckled. "Man, this world sure is full of nut jobs..."

As rain began to pour over the mountains, Alexander entered into the caves where his companions are. Christian yawned as he slowly got off the giant rock he was napping on. Takashi was leaning against the wall, holding his knife with his hoof. Joshua approached Alexander.

"About time your ass came back," Joshua grumbled, "You got the stuff?"

Alexander nodded as he put down the saddlebag he had with him. Aura appeared from his horn as he used his magic to levitate a black book in front of his companions.

"So, what is the plan?" Takashi asked as he put away his knife.

"We still gotta get rid of Cotton for good," Alexander explained, "From what I heard, this book should rid of him. I don't know what it does, but if it can rid of Cotton, then that's fine by me."

Christian stretched his legs, "When do we leave?"

Alexander put back the book inside the saddlebag, "NOW."

---

Cotton lying on his bed, sleeping. He let out soft snores, which were the only sounds during the night, besides the quiet sound of the wind. Eventually, faint hoofsteps were heard. Cotton, who was still sleeping, didn't pay attention to the sound. However, the hoofsteps were getting a bit louder as time passed.

Cotton opened his eyes and quickly observed his room. Cotton took a while as he slowly turned his head to observe more. Eventually, he let out an exhausted yawn and went back to bed.

Mah imagination...

---

Cotton yawned loudly as he opened his eyes, only to close them back due to being tired, despite having a long night's rest.

He slowly removed his blankets and calmly got off his bed. He carefully rubbed his eyes. He stopped rubbing them when he realized one thing.

He no longer had a hoof.

He opened his eyes a bit, only find out that he had his hand back. In fact, he discovered that he was once again a human. Cotton blinked rapidly as he looked around his room. To his surprise, he found a brown uniform on top of a brown wooden desk that was next to his bed. He walked up to it and saw a license card on top of the uniform. Cotton raised an eyebrow when he realized that his face was on the card.

"Cotton Hill...Janitor?!...Canterlot High? What the hell?"

Cotton widen his eyes when he remember that Dale once ranted about an 'Equestranauts Girls movie.' All Cotton knew was that there were colorful humans, most of the ponies that were in the show are now humans, and that there was a red demon. Cotton honestly didn't care about what Dale ranted about. At least Cotton was a human again. Sighing, he put on the uniform and exited out of the room.

"A house, huh?" He said as he examined the hallway, "Nice. By mahself. What more do Ah need?"

His question was answered when he saw some car keys next to a driver's license that had Cotton's face on it.

"Hell yeah."

---

Cotton had trouble not grinning as he drove his red car to school. Despite the fact that it looked like an ordinary car on the outside, it was the inside that sold the deal. Cotton discovered that the car was complete with a DVD player, seat warmers, a fully-functional air conditioner, and a built-in GPS. He used the GPS to find where the location of the school is.

Cotton rolled down the windows to get a good look of the school. He dropped his jaw when he saw that a majority of the students were multi-colored and looked cartoonish. Shrugging, he closed back the windows and drove to the parking lot, oblivious to a certain screaming teenager who was purple.

Cotton left his car and entered into the school. Some students greeted him politely, which made Cotton assume that, somehow, he had been doing this job for a long time. What surprised him was meeting some 'familiar faces,' such as Big Macintosh, which Cotton called him Philip J. Fry, Diamond Tiara, which annoyed Cotton a bit, and the Crusaders.

He eventually found the principal's office and entered it. There, to his surprise, he saw a white-skinned woman sitting at her desk. Cotton realized that it was Celestia.

She's actually kinda hot, Cotton admitted.

Celestia smiled at Cotton, "Hello Cotton. You're early. You can have some time off before you have to mop the floors."

Cotton nodded, "Thanks...Ah guess."

"Oh, and tell your son I said hi."

Cotton froze, "Mah son?"

"Yes, you know, Hank Hill? Friends with Bill Dauterive, Dale Gribble, and Jeff Boomhauer. Doesn't get along with Kahn Souphanousinphone."

"Mr. Kahn?"

"Yes, Kahn. You know, the kid who gets in trouble with Mark Walsh and Ben Long?"

"Um...Ah'm gonna leave."

Cotton immediately exited out of the office, a frantic look on his face. Alright, he thought, So apparently mah son and his friends are here... He didn't notice where he was walking as he accidentally bumped into a teenager.

"Hey!" She yelled rudely, "I'm walking here!"

Cotton turned around and saw an angry teen with red and yellow hair. Cotton just snorted.

"Whatever."

"Don't you whatever me, you...dirty ol' SHIN-LESS FREAK!"

Cotton seemed to be offended by her words. She noticed this and smiled devilishly.

"That's right, Cotton. I called you shin-less. Because calling you a midget or a circus boy wouldn't have any effect, don't you agree?"

She rudely shoved him aside, enraging Cotton even further.

"That whore..." He whispered as he walked away, "Well, might as well look around the school. Learn some info on these kids and scchool. Ah'm sure this mopping thing won't be a big deal."

---

Cotton dropped his jaw when he saw the floors were dirtier then he had imagined. He leaned his mop on one of the lockers as he checked how much he had to mop. The answer made him shocked even more. Most of the kids weren't here, so at least he was able to work in peace.

Cotton let out a sigh as he grabbed his mop and slowly cleaned the floors. "Goddamn kids," he muttered bitterly as he took some time to scrub off some dirt that was stained on the floor, "Even HERE the teens act like jackasses..."

As he mopped the floor, he heard a teenage girl talking with somebody. It caught Cotton's attention as he carefully eavesdropped on the conversation.

"I want you to follow her. Bring me something I can use just like I did with that last girl who thought she could challenge me."

Cotton let out a mischievous smirk. Sounds like something from those soap operas shows where the chick takes her top off, he thought. He heard a boy answer the girl.

"You got it, Sunset Shimmer."

Cotton raised an eyebrow. Sunset Shimmer?, he thought, Oh yeah...That annoying whore who made fun of mah shin-less legs.

"When the crown and its power are mine," Sunset explained, "Twilight Sparkle will be sorry she ever set hoof into this world. Not that she would've been much safer if she'd stayed in Equestria."

Cotton grin slowly faded. "What the hell is she talking about...?" He whispered to himself.

"Yeah, in Equestria," the boy, whom Cotton identified as Snips, replied.

"What are you still doing here?! Go!"

Cotton shook his head as he continued to mop the floor quietly.

"Oh," Sunset added, "And make sure you also take care of Hank and his friends, and Kahn, and, of course, that crazy janitor, Cotton."

Cotton looked up with a surprised look on his face.

"Got it Sunset!"

"What about that Mark and Ben?"

"Oh yeah, deal with them too! Get them expelled or something! Anything! And have that Cotton fired! Just keep them away from this school!"

"That sounds a lil' extrem-"

"I'm sorry, WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME?!"

"Um, nothing Sunset!"

"Good. Now SCRAM!"

Cotton let out a scowl as he tightened his mop with his hands. "Ass whupping time, bitch," he muttered as he walked away.

Very sorry for the late chapter. I was very busy. School is officially a bitch.

Cotton let out a sigh of relief as he finished mopping the floor. As he dropped the mop and leaned against the wall, he noticed a teenager with a light green sweater and orange hair. He was sporting sunglasses. Right next to him was another teen with a green and blue striped sweater, grey t-shirt and black hair with white highlights. He was wearing a headband on his head and had a reddish glass eye where his right eye was supposed to be at.

Cotton raised an eyebrow. He knew who these two were. "Hey Mark. Hey Ben."

The teen with the sunglasses, Mark, gave Cotton a high five. "What's up, Cotton?" he greeted with a grin, "Did you hear? Some girl's gonna compete for Princess of the Canterlot High Fall Formal!"

"She's actually pretty cute," Ben, the other teen, commented with a smirk, "I'm surprised that no one hit on her yet, she's 'Vice Principal Luna' pretty, eh Mark?"

Mark immediately blushed. "Cut it out!"

"Hey, it's not my fault you have a crush on her."

Ben started to laugh, Cotton joined in and eventually, Mark also joined them. As soon as they were done laughing, Cotton cleared his throat.

"So, who's the pretty gal?"

"Twilight Sparkle, I believe."

Cotton shook his head in disbelief. "She got a baby purple dragon with her?"

Ben and Mark exchanged confused expressions. "I think I saw her with a purple dog."

Cotton twitched an eye. "How interesting," he mumbled. Wait a minute! Dale said something about Breaking Dawn being in Canterlot High or something like that? OK...it's official. Ah'm in that Equestranauts Girls movie.

"Well, we gotta go. Nice talking with you Cotton!"

As Ben and Mark left, Cotton placed his hand on his forehead. "Ah guess Ah need to meet mah son and his pals. Oh, and Mr. Kahn."

---

Cotton headed for the track, since he knew his son would be there. He was correct when he noticed a Laotian teenager angrily wave his fist at four other teenagers.

"Stupid rednecks!" He hissed as he walked away. He accidentally bumped into Cotton.

"Oops." Kahn replied as he backed away from Cotton, "My bad."

Cotton let out a raised eyebrow. He had expected a 'watch where you're going' or 'move it.' Then again, Cotton knew that, just like on Earth, Kahn knew that Cotton shared the same hatred towards Hank.

"No worries, Mr. Kahn." Cotton replied as Kahn walked away. Cotton headed towards the four teenagers. He noticed that they both looked like their teen selves back on Earth.

"Hello, sir!" One teen, Dale, shouted as he saluted him. Cotton saluted back. I guess in this world, I'm still a WWII veteran. Or just a veteran. Don't know if they have WWII.

"Fall in!" Cotton yelled, resulting in Dale and his friends running up to him, bakcs straight.

"Hey dad." One teen, Hank, greeted with a tiny smile.

"SHUDDAP!" Cotton barked at Hank. He then turned his attention to Bill. "Fatty!"

"Sir!" Bill, the obese teen, loudly replied as he tightened his back and closed his eyes.

"So, dang ol' colonel, sir," the final teen, Boomhauer, said in his infamous way of talking, "how's your dang ol' I dunno, day and how you doing and you doing alright and fine and dandy, yo?"

Cotton shrugged, "I'm doing alright. You guys stay out of trouble, OK?"

The teenagers nodded and then saluted. Cotton did the same gestures and then left them.

---

Cotton's House

Nighttime

Cotton took off his clothes as he walked to his room. He let out a yawn as he threw his clothes on his desk. He climbed into his bed and let out a calm sigh.

"Tomorrow's a new day," he muttered as he closed his eyes, "I wonder what Hank, his friends, Mark, and others are doing on Equest-something..."

Cotton went to sleep very quickly. However, he woke up when he heard a voice that woke him up.

"Who's there?!"

Oooouuuuttttccccaaaasssstttt...

"What?" Cotton blurted out as he jumped out of his bed.

Ttttwwwwiiiilllliiiigggghhhhtttt...

"Twilight?"

Ccccrrrroooowwwwnnnn...

"I don't follow."

Ffffoooorrrrmmmmaaaallll...

"Wait, ya mean that Fall Formal in that school?"

Yyyyeeeessss...sssshhhheeee mmmmuuuusssstttt wwwwiiiinnnn...

"Wait why?"

Rrrreeeettttuuuurrrrnnnn...

"Return? Ya mean get out of this hell hole?"

Cotton heard nothing but silence. He stood there, in thought.

"So, I need to make Breaking Dawn win that crown? To return the pony world?"

He put his hand on his chin.

"Eh. On the bright side, I woulda helped Breaking Dawn just to get even with that that stupid Sunset gal."

He went back to his bed, laying down in his bed in thought.

---

The next day

Cotton rubbed his eyes as he entered the school.

"Alright. Make that girl a princess here. Should be eas-"

"Hey Cotton!"

Cotton turned around and saw Mark and Ben running toward him.

"Hey Mark. Hey Ben. How's it going?"

Mark took out his phone.

"You know that Twilight girl who wanted to run for princess?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Sunset Shimmer just posted a video about this."

Cotton raised an eyebrow and stared at the phone as Mark put on a video

Twilight Sparkle wants to be your Fall Formal Princess. What does it say about our school if we give someone like this... such an important honor?

Cotton's eyes widen.

"Oh sh..."

---

"-eesh!" A Laotian teenager blurted out as he threw his arms in the air. He was immediately shushed by a tan skinned teenager.

"Quiet, dang ol' man!" The tan teen said to the Laotian teen, "Let the dang ol' master talk man."

"OK, so we just find the old man, right?" A teenager wearing a blue shirt asked to the walkie talkie.

"Correcto," Discord's voice came from the walkie talkie, "Find him then use that lil' red stone to teleport back to Equestria."

"Hey, Frenchie, you better not hit on these kids or something," a chubby teenager quipped to a handsome Cajun teenager.

"Hmph. Such manners," the Cajun teenager replied, facing away from the chubby teenager. "Must be from smashing cans daily."

"Alright, we have our orders," a skinny teen with glasses and a strange red stone on his palms, "Let's go find Mr. Cotton Hill."

"Dang ol' yo man."

A bonus. :)