Romance and the Fate of Equestria

Chapter Twenty-Six

Fluttershy and Big Macintosh helped the Cutie Mark Crusaders set up a number of strange blinking and twirling machines in the barn at Sweet Apple Acres. At the center of all the machines stood Cheerilee, hooked up to a series of wires and monitors.

"Wow, Cheerilee," Fluttershy commented. "That's a lot of equipment attached to you there."

Cheerilee shrugged. "Eh, beats teaching."

Scootaloo frowned. "Wait, what?"

"I'm kidding, Scootaloo. It's a teacher joke. I actually love teaching, you know that."

"Don't worry yourself about all the attachments on you," Apple Bloom said. "These machines don't actually do anything, it's just to make everythin' look cool. This'll be simple, Miss Cheerilee, simple and fun."

"Okay, then," Cheerilee said, smiling.

Rainbow Dash stealthily watched these proceedings from the highest window of the barn.

"Rainbow Dash!"

Rainbow whirled around. Applejack was down on the ground, looking up and scowling at her.

"Oh hey," Rainbow said casually. "What's up, buddy?"

"Care to explain why you've been spying on Big Mac lately?" Applejack said casually.

"I don't stalk Big Mac, I stalk Fluttershy," Rainbow said matter-of-factly. "Their locations just tend to overlap a lot recently."

"Oh, please, you're an even worse liar than I am," Applejack sneered. "I've seen the way you've been lookin' at my brother. It's cool, RD, I get it. He's been seein' Fluttershy, so he's been hangin' out with us a lot more, and you've fallen for him. It happens, okay?"

Rainbow smiled sheepishly and floated down to the ground. "Hey… the heart wants what it wants, am I right?"

"You can't act on this, Rainbow Dash," Applejack said sternly. "It'll kill your friendship with Fluttershy. Kill it and kill it dead! You know that, right?"

"I have no intention of doing anything to interfere with anypony's relationship," Rainbow said simply.

"But you just said…"

"I know what I just said, but I don't give a damn what 'the heart' wants. I'm stronger than 'the heart'. You should know that."

Applejack scowled, unconvinced. "And the, uh, stalking?"

"Hey, just because I'm not interfering doesn't mean I can't get an eyeful," Rainbow said, pressing her face against a lower window. "Is that a crime?"

"What, stalking? This may come as a shock, but that's a little bit of a crime, yeah. Just a little."

"Tccht!" Rainbow hissed sharply. "Look in there. What are those kids doing…?"

Apple Bloom looked over Cheerilee and all of the surrounding equipment. "Okay, we're ready," she said. "Scootaloo—fire up the dramatic, swirly, sciencey displays."

"Right away," Scootaloo said. She beat her wings and took to the air, touching the levers and buttons running all along the tops of the machines and among the rafters. Fans and lights started whirling and twirling and blinking. Scootaloo saluted Apple Bloom and remained hovering above Cheerilee's head.

Cheerilee turned her head to get a better look at her. "Scootaloo, you can…? How long have you been flying?"

Scootaloo shrugged. "Couple of hours, maybe? I've been reading up on exercises to get my wings to sprout early, until I was informed that those exercises are completely bogus, so I just got some Golden Thread and, yeah. Now I can fly."

"All right, that's set up," Apple Bloom said thoughtfully. "Sweetie Belle?"

The tip of Sweetie Belle's horn glowed with pale green energy. "Weeks of tireless studying," she declared, "and I finally have the ultimate power… to kill the lights!"

Sweetie Belle's magic enveloped the overhead lights, and they all went out simultaneously, leaving the barn lit only by the stars and moon outside, plus the superfluous light displays, which had been deliberately placed to leave Cheerilee completely shrouded in darkness.

"You ready, Miss Cheerilee?" Apple Bloom said softly.

"I… I think so, Apple Bloom," Cheerilee said, a nervous smile permeating her voice.

"Okay, girls, we're all gonna fire it up!"

There was a whirring sound, and Cheerilee cried out in pain.

"Cheerilee?" Fluttershy called out in concern.

Cheerilee's response was interrupted by a loud thunk. "AAAAGH!" she cried.

"Sorry, Miss Cheerilee," Apple Bloom called to her. "You'll be okay… as I'm sure you've noticed, it only hurts for a split second. How do you feel now?"

"Mm… I'm fine," Cheerilee forced out. "Actually, I feel really good… strong, and… smarter, somehow? What… why would I…?"

"Bring the lights back up, Sweetie," Apple Bloom commanded.

"You got it, uber-boss," Sweetie Belle said, clicking her tongue. The entire barn was then lit by the pale green light of her magic, making every pony in the barn only visible in silhouette.

"Shall I tear down the machines?" Scootaloo asked from up above. "This is… this is pretty cool, Apple Bloom."

"Rip 'em down," Apple Bloom agreed.

Scootaloo flew around dismantling the machines—as it turned out, they were nothing but blinking lights and fans sticking out of holes cut in cardboard boxes.

"Come on into the light, Miss Cheerilee," Apple Bloom said.

Cheerilee stepped out, sporting what was unmistakably a pair of pegasus wings and a unicorn horn.

"Check this out, y'all… through the power of science and magical research, we, the Cutie Mark Crusaders, have given humble earth pony Cheerilee ALL THE POWERS OF THE THREE RACES! AH-HAHAHAHAHA! BWA-HAHAHAHAHA! MUUUUWA-HAHAHAHAHAHA—do I have a cutie mark?"

Scootaloo dropped to the ground next to Apple Bloom and checked. "Nope. Me?"

"No."

Sweetie Belle checked her own flank. "Damn it," she grumbled. She irritably extinguished the pale green light and lit all of the barn's overhead lanterns.

Under proper light, it was more apparent that Cheerilee's new appendages were entirely artificial; the wings were a pale creamy color, the horn dark brown. Cheerilee sat down and began stroking one of her wings with a hoof.

"Seriously?" she said with disbelief. "None of you got a cutie mark for this? This… this is an absolute marvel of magic! You've attached these to my shoulders with… what, acupuncture needles?"

"That's right," Apple Bloom said, giggling.

"Each individual feather, a strip of oak bark," Cheerilee said with wonder. "Held together with… copper? Little copper wires? And… what are the bones made of?"

"Titanium," Apple Bloom said proudly. "Dug it up in the Everfree Forest." When Big Macintosh looked concerned, she hastily added, "…ish area… vicinity."

"And the horn?" Cheerilee inquired. It glowed with a yellow aura, as did a nearby bale of hay, which rocked back and forth slightly when Cheerilee looked at it.

"Mahogany," Sweetie Belle said. "But it comes in all kinds of cool materials." She whipped out a bundle of blue cloth and opened it, revealing an assortment of differently-colored unicorn horns. "We've got marble, iron, steel, ivory, oak, pine, limestone…"

Cheerilee stared in alarm at the long and sinister-looking needles coming out of the bases of each of the horns. "And… the needle, it goes… straight into my brain?"

"Almost," Apple Bloom said. "Scratches the surface, really, givin' you the knowledge you need to perform magic."

"This is… I mean, I didn't even know this was possible," Cheerilee breathed. "How was this accomplished?"

"No biggie, really," Sweetie Belle said. "We just read up on engineering, magic, and acupuncture, and… figured it out from there."

"Well, that and we do all our manufacturing deep in the Everfree Forest-ish area-vicinity," Scootaloo said. "I get the feeling that's the only reason the stuff actually works. We've all been testing this stuff on ourselves, see? And now that we know it works on other ponies too, we're ready to give it to the whole world!"

"We also have earth pony pins!" Sweetie Belle said cheerfully, producing an assortment of flower-shaped ornaments made of precious metal and studded with multicolored gems. The needles on these items extended out the ornaments' backs, like earrings.

"You know, if you ever feel you're deficient in that area," Sweetie Belle went on. "You plug it straight into your heart. I'm wearing one right now." She stood on her hind legs, revealing one made of gold and emeralds on her chest. "I've been caring for the trees. I can feel their vibe now. They think I'm cute." She giggled.

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. "You hit on trees now? You won't talk to Spike, but you'll flirt with trees?"

Sweetie Belle rolled her eyes as well. "Now's really not the time."

"Spike's a catch, dude."

"I have a boyfriend."

"Yeah, that's gonna last all of twenty minutes, and then where will you be?"

Fluttershy stepped forward, eyes wide in anticipation. "This pin, it… it gives you the powers of an earth pony?"

"Uh-huh," Apple Bloom said.

"Can I have one?" Fluttershy said eagerly. "Do you need to hook me up to something to get it into my heart?"

"No, no, that was all just for show," Apple Bloom said. "Which one do you want? All you gotta do is fire 'em up."

Fluttershy selected one of platinum and pink amethyst, stood on her hind legs, and tapped it curiously. The needle found her heart and promptly pushed itself in, causing Fluttershy to yelp in pain.

"Fluttershy!" Big Mac gasped.

"I'm okay," she said. "I'm okay…" She dropped back down to all fours. "So… it'll work now? Just like that?"

"Yeah, just like that," Sweetie said. "It's subtle, hard to notice at first. But you'll start to feel the effects as you go about your life and stuff."

Big Macintosh stepped forward and stared in awe at the many pieces of equipment the Crusaders had presented. "What… what do you girls call this stuff?"

"CMC," Apple Bloom said proudly.

Fluttershy tilted her head to the side, curious. "Cutie Mark Crusaders?"

"No, Crusaders Mecha," Apple Bloom said. After a brief silence, she clarified, "the second C is, you know, for the C in, uh, in the middle of the word 'Mecha'."

From outside, Rainbow Dash flapped away from the window in awe. "Wow… that's amazing…"

Applejack ignored that statement, turning away from the window to glare at Rainbow. "So, what are we gonna do about this whole Big Macintosh deal?"

Rainbow Dash blinked in surprise. "Are you serious? You're seeing this, aren't you? You gotta be a unicorn way beyond Twilight's level to—"

"Don't change the subject," Applejack snapped. "We're gonna talk about how you're gonna deal with your feelings for Big Mac."

"Your thirteen-year-old sister just turned Cheerilee into a cyborg-immortal… thing!" Rainbow said in disbelief. "Does that not impress you at all?"

"No, I'm impressed," Applejack said. "Impressed and proud and a little bit freaked out, yeah, but that's not what we're talkin' about right now."

"You are so strange."

"Never mind, you know what? Just do it your way. Shall I pre-write the letter for you?"

"Letter?" Rainbow repeated. "What letter?"

"Here, I'll start it," Applejack said. She mimed writing something. "Dear Princess Celestia, today I learned that friends should respect each other's relationships, i.e., not try to steal each other's loyal and devoted boyfriends…"

"Okay, okay, I get it," Rainbow muttered.

"Stealing boyfriends is a hopeless pursuit that can only end in tears for the pony who tried to do it. I marvel at my own stupidity. I can't help but wonder what kind of drugs I must have been taking in order to think that this could possibly be a good idea…"

"Are you done?" Rainbow snapped.

Applejack thought for a second. "Well… no, I got more. You wanna hear more?"

"I get the picture, okay? He's a great guy who's never gonna betray Fluttershy. I realize that. So, I'm not gonna talk to Big Mac, or look at him, or nothing. I'll just hang around and suffer my lame unrequited schoolgirl crush in silence. Are you happy now?"

Applejack sighed. "Look, I get that you're unhappy, but… what can ya do, you know?"

"Yup… what can I do?"

Cheerilee exited the barn. Applejack and Rainbow Dash ducked behind the barn to conceal their presence.

The schoolteacher flapped her new wings and took to the air for a brief second. Her hooves dragged along the ground, and she couldn't stay truly aloft for more than a few seconds.

Nevertheless, the fact that she had wings at all held a significance that hung over the two of them.

"Those punk Crusaders just changed the world," Rainbow whispered.

"Yeah… it's a bit scary," Applejack agreed.