Romance and the Fate of Equestria

Chapter One Hundred and Fifty-Five

"How do you alwaysss find me?" Mitgaeard demanding, her snout wrinkled in a snarl.

"Dream vision," Kolassa said casually.

A pillar of white sand popped out of the ground and clipped Mitgaeard in the chin, then flipped itself over and slapped her downward on the snout, forcing her closer to the ground.

The other goddesses came in from every direction, flying over the sparse forest of tiny cherry trees that existed near the coast of Nara, fine white sand sprinkled all over the forest's moist soil.

With a mighty heave, Okapiopteryx uprooted a cherry tree, brandishing it in her talons, and jabbed it into Mitgaeard's gums, while Luna and Song Li hovered side by side and shot energy beams at the scales along Mitgaeard's jawline.

"Nara is a lovely country, isn't it?" said Luna, as casually as she could when yelling over the sound of the energy coming from her horn and Song Li's front hooves.

"It is," Song Li yelled back. "I am surprised it's so obscure. I would visit often, had I the time."

One of Mitgaeard's scales cracked under the pressure of the beams, which seemed to snap the giant serpent back into focus; she chomped on the cherry tree Okapiopteryx was brandishing, reducing it to splinters.

"A weapon?" Mitgaeard whispered, slowly turning her head to the tiny queen. "Why would you ussse a weapon againssst me when your own immortal clawsssss and hornsss would be ssssso much more effective?" She blinked her eyes with fascinating slowness. "You are diverting me. Sssssomething isss going on elsssewhere that you wish for me to misssssss." She eyed the southern horizon. "My treasure hoard…"

"Uh-oh, she's onto us," Luna said dryly. "Celestia!"

Celestia approached from the west, hovering directly between Mitgaeard and the setting sun. Mitgaeard reflexively turned to face her, hissing and squinting briefly. Celestia opened her eyes and mouth wide, and from her entire face she shot a massive wave of golden sunlight into the serpent's face.

Mitgaeard hissed and flew away to the south, but Celestia pursued, not letting up on the beam. As Mitgaeard built up speed, the beam moved from her face to the back of her heard, and further along her body, leaving scorched marks and cracked scales all down Mitgaeard's back.

Okapiopteryx curled up into a ball and bodily hurled herself into Mitgaeard's sides again and again, to little effect. Scoffing with frustration, she dashed forward in an attempt to catch up to Mitgaeard's head. As she did, another sandy tendril popped out of the ground and slugged Mitgaeard in the jaw; Okapiopteryx elegantly spun in the air to dodge the sand, and raked her claws along Mitgaeard's jawline.

Luna flew alongside Kolassa, who was galloping in pursuit, but had quickly been left behind.

"We will lose much of our advantage when the sun goes down," Luna reported.

"Mm-hmm, and if the sun goes down, whose fault is that?" Kolassa shot back, eyeballing Luna playfully.

Luna chuckled. "I could halt the cycle, I suppose, keep the sun up a while longer. It would certainly do less harm in the long run than if we can't stop her."

"What advantage specifically will we lose?"

"The moment the sun dips below the horizon, Celestia will lose her sight and her strongest magic."

"And what'll happen to you?" Kolassa challenged.

"I?" said Luna. "Well then, I suppose I would pick up Celestia's slack." She laughed enthusiastically and picked up speed, leaving Kolassa behind in her wake.

Okapiopteryx had dug her talons into the tip of Mitgaeard's pointed snout, and was pulling her down toward the ground with all of her might.

Song Li dove down, wrapping her arms around the serpent's jaws, and set off the thrusters in her hind hooves, adding to the force of Okapiopteryx's pull. Celestia conjured a whip of pure light, which she formed into a lasso, wrapping it around Mitgaeard's jaws. Luna swooped down as well, pushing on the serpent's head to aid the pulling, and Kolassa appeared and pushed as well.

"Oh my us, we're actually doing it!" Kolassa said exuberantly. "We're actually holding her!"

"Forcing her to the ground," Celestia agreed with a grim smile.

Two bright red circles appeared on Mitgaeard's cheeks like an extra pair of eyes; a massive fireball blasted them all backward, reducing one of Kolassa's front legs to dust and scattering all of them. Only Song Li remained, maintaining her grip precariously. Much of her armor had cracks in it and pieces missing, revealing patches of shaggy electric-blue fur, much of it burned.

"Song Li!" Celestia called. "Song Li, get out of there!"

"No!" Song Li retorted. "I can hold her! I can force her down…"

She shut her eyes in concentration. Her armor began repairing itself, the skintight material wrapping around her front hoof once more. She used it to defiantly shoot an energy pulse directly into Mitgaeard's eye. In response, she gave a bestial roar and repeated the fireball attack. This threw Song Li to the ground, breaking off even more of her armor.

The sun touched the horizon, and the sky began to darken with almost alarming speed. Mitgaeard flapped her small flippers, picking up speed. Luna pursued her at a high altitude, shooting a silver moonbeam at her back. Kolassa blundered her way through the forest, slowly gathering sand from the forest floor to repair her leg, attempting with her remaining front leg to grab Mitgaeard around the middle.

Celestia landed on the ground and rushed to Song Li's side. "Well… I cannot see a thing, but that had to hurt."

"I would say so," Song Li replied weakly.

"Are you hurt? Let me look at you…"

Celestia lit her horn, bathing Song Li in a tiny patch of sunlight, where Celestia saw that her mask and helmet were completely gone. Song Li's ears were arrowhead-shaped, the fur around her muzzle was shaped to give her the appearance of a hooked beak, and she had three pairs of narrow, light brown eyes which fluttered with the pain of her wounds and the brightness.

"You're—beautiful!" Celestia blurted.

Song Li smiled weakly. "You really can't see a thing."

Okapiopteryx landed beside them. "I fear this is going very wrong," she said. "Mitgaeard is still going strong. I hope in my heart your adventurers are doing their part. We can't keep slowing her down very long."

"Not with you standing over here we can't," Celestia said, cracking a bitter smile. "Kolassa and Luna are suppressing her fairly well. Join them as best as you can, you're the one who's good at that, at the holding her back thing. I'll be with you as soon as I'm sure Song Li is going to be all right."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Steven made an attempt at a vicious roar as he faced down the three pegasus adventurers, deep within the waterlogged coastal cave.

"Wear 'im down, boys," Rose Belt said with a smirk. "Then I'll take care of him."

Flasher and Snare rose up to the river serpent's eye level, Flasher drawing his toylike crossbow and Snare producing a collection of throwing knives.

Snare flew a bit higher and threw the knives in a frighteningly precise spray, but they bounced harmlessly off of Steven's snout scales. Steven glared at Snare and swatted him out of the air. "Quit it!" he snapped.

From Flasher's crossbow came a barrage of pure energy missiles, striking at Steven's chest at a rate of two or three per second. Soon, they stopped firing, and Flasher opened his crossbow, tossing aside an empty cartridge of some sort, cartoonish and brightly colored just like the bow itself, and replaced it with another, gripping the crossbow in his metal hands and firing another barrage.

"Would you just get out of here?" Steven whined, erratically waving his hands around.

Snare carefully dodged each swing of his skinny arms as he rose back into the air, tossing several large black rings at Steven's face, which sliced the front of his snout, far more effectively than the knives had.

Flasher tossed aside the second cartridge, and in the crossbow he placed what appeared to be an oversized pony's skull covered in pink powder. He launched it at Steven's face and it disintegrated, the pink dust exploding into smoke which he had no choice but to inhale.

"Whoa…" Steven said sleepily. "What's going on with this…? Funky…"

Snare produced another object from his leather vest, a nasty metal bear trap. He pried it open and tossed it at Steven, and before it reached the serpent it launched a barrage of heavy black arrows, the force of the expulsion changing the trap's direction and leaving it to tumble into the water.

The arrows buried themselves in Steven's belly, and the toxins within quickly put him to sleep. His massive head landed with a crash on the cave floor.

Rose Belt landed in front of him, spreading her wings. A pointy metal wingblade appeared from nowhere, sheathing itself around the primary feather of her left wing. Grinning smugly, she walked toward Steven's throat.

"Wait!" Trixie yelled, desperately struggling forward on the precarious, rough rocks at the cave's sides. "You can't kill him!"

"Why not?" Belt said casually.

"Isn't it obvious he's a slave?" Trixie said urgently. "Look at the terror in his face. I don't think the treasure matters to him one way or the other. He's only guarding it because they make him."

Belt smiled at Trixie through heavily-lidded eyes. "Fascinating. Why didn't either of you pick up on that?" She raised an eyebrow at Snare and Flasher, who stared back at her blankly. "On into the cave, then. Let's see this alleged treasure hoard."

The three pegasi flew through the cave—slowly, so that Trixie could keep up with them on hoof, unsteadily walking across the cave's edges.

All together, they entered the massive city-sized cavern, filled to the brim with gold. They were shocked into silence at the hoard's massive size, none of them moving apart from their eyes, until Flasher took to the air, lowering his one optic lens over his right eye.

"LOOK AT ALL THIS TREASURE!" he squealed. "Look at this…"

He rushed over to one pile, digging through objects with his mechanical fingers. "A bracelet made of cold lightning!" he exclaimed, holding up the object. "A ball gown woven from water. L-l-look at this gigantic golden statue! Are these shadow diamonds? And… AND THIS BIG HONKIN' RUBY!" His eyes even wider than usual, he held up a flawless red gemstone almost as big as his entire body, carefully balanced atop his hooves.

"Wow," Trixie remarked blankly. "He's excited." Snare laughed.

"Belt, we can't destroy all of this!" Flasher pleaded. "It's far too—"

A rumbling sound came from overhead, shaking the ceiling slightly. They all looked up apprehensively.

"The goddesses are counting on us, folks," Belt said quietly. "The world is counting on us." She gazed at the treasure, the glittering gold reflecting in her eyes. "But it's so shiny… all right."

From a pouch in her belt, she produced a large, purple cloth sack, unfolding it and laying it down on the cavern floor. "Anything that catches your eye, put it in the bag," she commanded. "Demolish the rest. As quickly as possible."

They all flew into action, scattering in every direction. Flasher's first move was to gather up all the objects he had pointed out, and stuffing them into the bag, where they vanished instantly, leaving the bag still seeming empty.

Each of the adventurers had items they had acquired from Song Li; wooden disks with red buttons in the center, steely orbs, and pitch black wrist-mounted devices armed with bright red points.

The buttons in the wooden disks were pressed, and barrages of them were tossed into the mountains of coins; the resulting explosions melted the coins and gems into much smaller, featureless lumps.

The orbs were thrown with much more urgency, as when they activated everything around them in a 20-foot radius was obliterated into nothingness. The wrist-mounted gadgets shot pure black energy beams which disintegrated the treasures into fine black powder.

All the while, the four adventurers were grabbing objects and tossing them into the magical bag, where it vanished. In five minutes, they had brought down over a dozen of the mountainous treasure piles.

"WHAT… THE… HELL?"

The four of them froze and slowly turned around. Vorpal Blade, Skippmud, and Crazyface were standing at the entrance to the cave, Vorpal Blade's many wings bristling and his face tightly contorted with rage.

"Whoa," Belt said calmly, stepping forward. "Nice attachments. You look like you'd be really hard to draw, among other things."

"What have you done?" Vorpal Blade rasped. "These treasures were priceless, each individual one! And you've destroyed them all?" His voice rose several octaves as he spoke.

"You're the one who stole them!" Trixie shot back. "And were planning to use them to, what, buy off the whole world or something?"

"I… I never wanted that," Vorpal Blade fumed.

"Ah… another slave," said Belt, nodding. "Like the serpent outside."

"I'm not a slave!" he snapped. "Not a slave! I'm… I'm not a slave." His entire body shivered and his jaw tightened. "Look at what you've DONE! I've been building this collection for five hundred and fifty years!"

"And it only took us five, ten minutes to blow it all up!" Belt said cheerfully. "Kinda makes you wonder if it was all worthwhile, don't it? Nice eyeballs, by the way. Mind magic?"

He blinked in surprised. "Um… yeah."

He turned around and sighed, hanging his head. Skippmud and Crazyface looked at him uncertainly, waiting for their cue.

He looked up at them in bewilderment. "Kill them, won't you?" he said condescendingly.

Skippmud flapped her wings and took off. "Can't say no to that."

"No, I don't suppose we can," Crazyface agreed, trotting forward.

Skippmud's limestone horn sparked with magic, and from that magic blast she conjured up a gigantic, fat golden catfish which plopped down onto the cave floor, flailing around and grabbing Flasher in its big mouth.

Crazyface picked up speed and charged straight for Snare, who brought his wings together to block; Crazyface struck with his wing and broke right through Snare's guard, cutting his chest straight through his leather vest.

Belt prepared her wingblades once again, while Vorpal Blade gained altitude, telekinetically pulling Belt close.

"I will trap you in a nightmare so profoundly terrible you will beg for death," he snarled in her face as she struggled, trying to fly away. "Minutes will feel like years and I will NEVER let you free! All that I've ever worked for… all that I've ever had… you took it from me!"

A sudden burst of fireworks revealed the interior of his giant wing, the blue-gray slate chipping away to reveal the titanium and copper of the limb's skeleton and nerves. He lost his concentration and Belt broke free. Trixie was floating alongside her, one pink aura around her horn and another around her entire body.

"Ha ha ha! You learned how to fly!" Belt whooped.

"We should go," Trixie said anxiously. "That rumbling noise is getting…"

Mitgaeard burst through the ceiling of the cavern, chunks of stone flying everywhere. Only her head dangled from above, and she looked around at the fight, not quite comprehending what she was seeing.

"Enough of thisss…" she commanded. Three gray filaments burst from her mouth, unerringly seeking out Vorpal Blade, Skippmud, and Crazyface, who were all stuck by the filaments and pulled toward her. Mitgaeard snapped her jaws shut with the three of them dangling just inches outside of her mouth.

"My treasure is gone!" Vorpal Blade bawled. "It's all gone."

"We weren't planning on keeping it, fool," Mitgaeard retorted. She scanned what was left; there will still numerous towering mounds, but now bits of the cave floor were actually visible—more of it visible than not, when before the gold itself had been the only floor. "Does thisss redussssse itsss value sssssignificantly?"

"Uh, yeah!" Vorpal Blade snapped.

"That complicatesss thingsss," Mitgaeard admitted. "We shall have to be more frugal in the future, then."

Vorpal Blade blinked up at her wearily. "You were going to spend it all."

"Of courssse I was!" she spat. "I fully intend to ssspend what'sss left! You know that perfectly well! That was the PLAN!"

"Yes… yes, it was," he said quietly.

"Come," said Mitgaeard. "The time has come for retreat." She pulled herself back through the hole, bringing the trio along with her.

The four adventurers gathered together beneath the hole, all of them shaken and nervous, alone but for the now limp and motionless giant catfish. "They're gone," Snare reported.

"And I don't want to wait around until they come back," Belt said grimly. "For that matter, I don't want to wait around for the goddesses to find us either. Who knows what other kind of dangerous crap they'll have us do? I've had enough… goddesses, giant serpents, giant serpent goddesses, and that guy, with all those gadgets and mind magic—what the hell was that? Is he a god too? This is their world. They can do their own adventuring. Give me a spike trap or a cockatrice any day. I'll die by something of my own skill level. This is… beyond us."

She paused for a moment. "But… it wouldn't kill us to take a minute to gather up as much of this treasure as we can. Go! Go! Go! I want this bag filled all the way up to the brim!"

At that, Snare and Flasher immediately leapt into action, flying all around and collecting treasure to drop into the open bag.

"I thought it was extradimensional," Trixie said blankly.

"You heard me," said Belt, winking.

Trixie shrugged, and began magically collecting some treasure herself, dropping huge bundles of it into the bag, where it disappeared into nothingness.

"What about the serpent guard?" Trixie asked. "He's still being held against his will."

"Assuming we live in a universe where he's our problem," said Belt, "which we don't, what do you propose we do about him? He's huge. We can't carry him out of here. There's nothing we can do for him."

"I suppose you're right," Trixie said reluctantly. She gathered up an entire hill-sized pile of jewels and golden objects, funneling it into the bag somewhat slowly.

"Haha! Nice," Belt guffawed. "That'll do it. Back to the ship, then! Ah, but dang… we don't have Kolassa to pull it anymore. Lulamoon, all the simultaneous tasks that are required to sail a ship of that size… can you do those all by yourself with magic?"

Trixie thought for a brief moment, then smirked. "Pfft, of course I can."