Chapter 1 – Newbie

Twilight was sick of waiting. If Josh was indeed still alive, why wasn't he contacting them? Did the time skip have

something to do with it? Nopony knew, and Twilight and Trixie had had several avid discussions on the subject. They

had become good friends since the adventure to Earth of two months ago, and while Trixie still grieved, she had too

much science to do to remain focused on her grief for long. Twilight thought, and thought, and still thought. The war,

meanwhile, had taken a turn for the worse, as ponies were being captured and interrogated in startling numbers.

The war was far from Ponyville, though, so for the time being, they were safe. Twilight began composing a letter to

Josh, hoping that she might work a spell to send it to him. "Dear Josh," she began.

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"It's been two months since our last escapade. We miss you, and we hope you will return soon. You could be

reading this on… what was it? October 26, 2011, at 9:21 AM. Or you could be reading it later. Anyway, we want you

here in Equestria. Things aren't the same without you. Your friend, Twilight Sparkle." Twilight scanned her letter. It

wasn't bad, but not her best quality. She was about to call Trixie to try and send the letter when a blinding green

flash erupted in her bedroom, the letter disappearing.

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Shane was overseeing Gordon Freeman as they worked on the new specimen from Xen. He was a young intern sent

to Black Mesa because of his good grades, and was happy to be there. He didn't get to do anything, but it was nice

enough working here. He had had the choice of here or Aperture Science, and he chose Black Mesa because by all

accounts, it was cleaner. A man in a blue suit and red tie walked in, seemingly from nowhere, and whispered into his

ear (which startled the hell out of Shane), "prepare for unforeseen consequences… brony." He repeated the first

part of his message to the group overseeing Gordon, minus the brony part, and left, smirking all the while. Shane,

meanwhile, was flabbergasted. How did a random suit-n-tie know his secret? He had never told anyone he had

watched the show. Gordon pushed the crystal in, and immediately the Anti-Mass Spectrometer began to malfunction.

Shane snapped out of the reverie and immediately stood up, knocking a chair over. A scientist was beckoning to him

to escape the disaster. Shane was about to comply when he vanished in a green light.

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When the smoke cleared, a human was lying facedown on the floor. Twilight almost thought it was Josh for a

second, as it, well, he, was wearing a white labcoat. Closer inspection revealed that he was not Josh, but indeed

had similar attire. The logo on his lapel pin was the only major difference, bearing an image of a strange raised

platform inside a circle, and "Black Mesa – Intern Shane Wright" on the rest. Twilight didn't know about Black Mesa,

so she assumed it was another strange company, and teleported to Fluttershy's to inform her of her new,

unconscious patient.

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"Who… wha… What?" Shane said as he painfully cracked open his eyes. He was lying on a small bed, and a yellow

pony with wings was watching him anxiously. Wait… pony? Yellow? …Wings? His eyes snapped open, and the pony

fell back with a small squeal. "Oh! Sorry…" Shane apologized. The pony looked at him, still somewhat afraid. "My

name's Shane," he said. "And is yours… Fluttershy?" he asked. Fluttershy nodded, but was very confused. How did a

random human know her name?

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By the time Shane was feeling better, it was already well into the night. The Mane Six were gathered around to hear

his story. They, in turn, explained that he wasn't the first to come here, and Shane listened attentively. Then he

caught 'Aperture Science', and 'Equestrian Enrichment Center,' and groaned. Why did Aperture have to beat them to

everything? The company kidnapped astronauts, for goodness' sake!

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Tomorrow, Shane was supposed to see the famed Enrichment Center, and meet the current caretaker. He was

thrilled that he was in Equestria – it was the dream of every brony ever – but at the same time, he was

apprehensive. There was a war going on between ponies and griffins over who should have control of Aperture

technology, and he suspected that the guy who'd been here before, Josh Stevenson apparently, had started it. For

now, he was in Fluttershy's cottage, in the spare bed. He drifted off to sleep…

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Shane was having a pleasant dream when Nightmare Moon suddenly appeared, his dream fading to a white

nothing. "Human," she bellowed, "we have waited far too long for another. You will be the one to help us," she

declared. Shane was scared out of his wits. "Wh-what do you mean?" he timidly asked. Nightmare Moon looked

straight at him. "You will find out soon," she said, and vanished, laughing.

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Shane woke up in a cold sweat. It was just beginning dawn, and he presumed Celestia was busy raising the sun. He

got up, got his clothes back on, and went outside to take a morning walk, leaving a note for Fluttershy. As he

walked, he took in everything around him – the bright sky, Cloudsdale in the distance, and all that. Shane was

intoxicated by the calming air of Equestria.

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By the time he got back, Fluttershy was waiting for him, so they could visit the Enrichment Center that was

apparently located elsewhere in the Everfree Forest. It was a short walk through the dark and creepy woods before

they found the small gray building with a security camera on the outside, and Fluttershy rang the doorbell. The door

opened, but no one was there. Shane heard the intercom click on, and a young female pony with a familiar, but

somewhat computerized voice spoke.

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"Oh, hello Fluttershy! Is this the new human?" it said, the camera studying Shane. Fluttershy nodded and excused

herself. The camera, watching the door close, turned back to Shane. "What is your name, and what company do you

work for?" Shane was reluctant to answer. "Come on, spill it out." The voice coaxed. "I'm Shane Wright, and… I work

for Black Mesa." There was a silence, and then the voice said "GET. OUT," and the floor panels below Shane rose up,

and unceremoniously dumped him outside. "Your 'company'," the voice spat, "is nothing more than thieves." Shane

took offense at that. "I wanted to learn about the other human who was here, not steal your stuff!" The voice took

on a depressed tone. "He's dead. Or stuck on another Earth. What do you care?" Shane smiled. "What if I could

bring him back?" There was a silence on the other end. "…Maybe you can come in after all…" the voice finally

answered, a panel next to the door opening. Shane was apprehensive, but ventured inside once more.

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Chapter 2 – Preparations and Hiring

*two months ago*

Josh was not a happy person. He had been traipsing around this universe's New York City for a while now, and

couldn't find a place to stay. People were gawking at his Long Fall Boots and Portal Device, but that was normal

to Josh. However, he caught whispers of 'cosplayer' and 'He's from Portal'. Josh didn't know what 'Portal' was

supposed to be. He hoped it was cool. To prove that he was not a cosplayer, he chose a nice-looking building and

portaled his way into an empty office, the people who were staring at him earlier now screaming in disbelief. Josh

rolled his eyes. Hadn't they ever seen a portal before?

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He made his way up to the roof of the building without further incident. There, he placed a portal on the side of

the building, which was taller than any others (Josh had chosen it for this) and jumped off. Before he knew it, a

crowd had gathered under him. He fired a portal at the space below him, causing the crowd to jump back, and

flung himself far out into the city. It reminded him of the time he had done the same with Canterlot. Only that

involved a lot more incapacitation of guards, and a lot more pony. Josh sighed. He missed Equestria. And now he

hated crows with a passion. He was still soaring through the air when he hit the side of another building with a

thump. Feeling the wind in his lungs leave him, Josh began to fall down the side, eventually landing on the

pavement. He looked up irritatedly at the building he had slammed into. It was a small store with scientific

equipment inside. What were the odds? Feeling a sense of fate, Josh shrugged and stepped inside.

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He met with a young woman, early twenties by the looks of things. "Hello, and welcome to Magnus Industries,"

she said with a smile. "How may I help you?" Josh smiled back. "Well, I was thinking of browsing the shop, looks

like you guys have a great selection, and also I was wondering if I could ask you a question." The woman

laughed. "If you're asking me out, Portal guy, I'm married." Josh got a good chuckle out of that. "No, I was

wondering if you could tell me what 'Portal' is." The woman cocked an eyebrow at him. "You don't know? You've

got the Aperture Science lapel pin, boots, gun…" Josh grimaced. "Err… do you have a flat wall I could use?" The

woman jerked her head at the wall behind her.

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A few fired portals and long explanations later, the woman was still staring in disbelief. "You're from Aperture

Science, went to the universe of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, and now you're here?" she shook her head.

"Promise you won't commit me to the nearest mental asylum? I wouldn't blame you, this is pretty far-fetched. So,

my universe is a series or two of video games?" he asked in return. The woman nodded, and promised not to tell

anyone. "My name's Sara, by the way. Spelled with no 'h'." she said. "Josh." He answered, and they jokingly

shook hands. "You know, I've always wanted to learn more about Aperture, and I've always wanted an assistant

around the shop. You up for it?" Josh grinned. "Give me food, bed and science and I'm set for life."

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*now*

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Shane and that pony in the suit were still discussing their plans. It was the first time a Black Mesa associate and

an Aperture Science associate had come together on the same issue, and normally Shane wouldn't have bothered

helping. But you were generally supposed to be kind and helpful in Equestria, and he somehow found that easier

to do here. Also, the pony seemed to have a crush on 'Josh'. Who was the pony in the robotic suit, anyway?

Finally, she said "I'm quite famished. Fancy a drink?" Shane nodded, and the suit split down one side, a blue pony

climbing out. She smoothed her mane and tail, and Shane realized that this was the Great and Powerful Trixie.

But how? She looked at him and smiled. "Josh took me in when I was about to die," she explained. "I was his

assistant and best friend before the… incident. Anyway, I know a good food and drink place around these parts,"

Trixie mentioned offhandedly.

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They finally arrived at Sugarcube Corner, and Trixie bought two cupcakes and two glasses of water to wash them

down. Pinkie, as per usual, gasped when she saw Shane, and rushed off. "Expect to be jumped at wherever you

live," Trixie muttered to him, and Shane laughed. They enjoyed the food and drinks, and headed over to

Twilight's. Now Shane was really confused. These two were supposed to be enemies, so why were they

discussing the latest news over tea and laughing? That Josh guy must have really turned Trixie around, Shane

guessed. Twilight noticed the preoccupied look on Shane's face and asked him if he was alright. "Just thinking,"

he replied. "Well, spill. What were you thinking about?" Shane blushed. "I was thinking that you're different than

the Trixie I saw in the show. You're nicer, smarter, kinder, all that. What did Josh do?" Trixie beamed. "Thanks for

the compliment!" then she drooped. "Josh gave me everything. A home, a job, food and board, and a friend," she

answered after a pause. "All he wanted in return was for me to have some fun with science." Twilight nodded,

noticing the small but visible tear in Trixie's eye.

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As they walked to Fluttershy's, Shane was still thinking about his position here. He was promised food as long as

he helped Trixie with the new gateway (based off an amalgamation of Black Mesa and Aperture Science

technology), and bed as long as he stayed with Fluttershy, but Shane longed for independence. And a computer.

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Josh surveyed his new bedroom. It was incredibly tiny, but he didn't care. The bed was spacious, and the pay was

just enough. He could get used to life here… But he knew Trixie would track him down and kill him if he didn't

make a few attempts to get back. He would need a lot of scrap metal and components if he wanted to build the

gateway, and it would take him a while. Fun would have to wait, he had serious science to do. Of course, Sara

had insisted she help, uttering "Friends never let friends science alone!" which Josh knew was one of his

company's mottos for cooperative testing.

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A/N: The return of Josh to the scene! Read, review, and explode!

…

With joy, I meant! Stop yelling at me, Trixie!

Chapter 3 – Interrogations and Revelations

Shane kicked a rock, watching the fillies play in the park. Sure, things were going great for him. But every time he

thought of his former compatriots at Black Mesa, a stab of pain was felt, deep in his heart. Still, that Josh had

gone through the same thing. All of his friends were dead. He had been trapped in a universe beyond his

imagination, but did the guy just lay down and die? No, Shane had heard. He made things work for him. He

punched a Manticore in the face. Why couldn't Shane be that cool?

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Josh certainly didn't feel cool at the moment. He was picking up several orders for hundreds of integrated circuits,

diodes, and assorted laser-cut steel parts. The money had been given to him by Sara, who insisted for him to get

started on the gateway. Josh smiled. She was demanding, but in a friendly way.

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A few hours later, he was soldering and welding components together. The gateway had been vastly improved

from the previous designs, now resembling a typical circular Aperture door, with a portal in the center. It had been

designed to link to a point in space just outside the Equestrian Enrichment Center. The designs had been

finished, but the project was not transitioning well from paper to reality. Half the time, Josh or Sara found some

flaw in the blueprints, or worse the machine itself, which they quickly corrected. "How does this thing run?" Sara

asked, surveying their work. So far, only the very bottom portion of the door had been completed, not counting

the inside circuitry and mechanics. "Same way portals work, but with a different 'link'. You know how each portal is

linked to the other in a typical portal device?" Sara nodded. "Instead, we program coordinates and specify a

universe, and the portal in the doorway gets linked to that instead." They heard a knock on the door. Sara

immediately went to get it.

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"Ma'am, we are here to inquire as to the presence of an illegal alien," a suited and tied official was speaking. Josh

thought fast, and dug out his old passport from his scientist's coat. He walked up to the front door. "Hello, do you

mean me?" Josh asked, holding out his passport for the apparent inspector to verify. The man took one look at it

and sniffed disdainfully. "I'm afraid this will have to be verified with our department," he said. "If you'll come with

me, I'm sure we can work this out," Josh raised an eyebrow, but followed. "I'll come back. Keep working," he

whispered to Sara on his way out. Sara nodded.

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The official led Josh to his car, a sleek black car (the windows were also tainted black), and they got in. The man

drove, and Josh passed the police station. "Hey, that was the-" he began, but stopped when a second man who

was in the passenger's seat shushed him. "You are now under service to the United States Government, and we

are going to ask you some hard questions later. For now, go to sleep." The last thing Josh felt was a noxious gas

being sprayed in the car, and a window between him and the other two sliding up, cutting them off from the gas.

"Dammit…" Josh said as he gave in to unconsciousness.

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Sara was concerned. It had been six hours, and she had kept working on the gate for only three of them, the

other spent anxiously watching the roads. She was afraid for Josh, as being new to this world could easily get him

in trouble. She still wasn't convinced that he had been to the pony universe, though. He might just be making a

portal to get somewhere else, maybe even in this universe. She was an avid brony, but it seemed unlikely that

such an event would not have affected the show in some way."

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"Where am I?" was the first thought Josh had when he woke up. Unfortunately, this was out loud. He looked

around. He was sitting in a conference room, handcuffed to a chair. A murmur was heard outside, and Josh

twisted his neck to see who it was. Another man in a suit (with no tie, however) came in, and sat in a seat next to

him. "Hello. You might be wondering where you are, but do not worry. You are in our office building in New York

City." Josh narrowed his eyes. His memory hadn't faded somehow, so he remembered the hostility with which

these men had treated him.

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"Whatever you want, the answer is very likely to be NO," he said without hesitation. The man regarded him with

a look of mild surprise on his face. "Your voice isn't slurred," he remarked. "Looks like I'm better than you, then,"

Josh said while grinning. He could see this irked the man. "We'd like to ask you some questions regarding how

you got here," the man continued, trying to keep his voice smooth. "Chances are I'll lie to you, of course," Josh

replied airily. "Who are you?" the man inquired, without noticing.

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"Josh Stevenson," Josh replied without missing a beat. "How did you get into this universe?" the man queried

next. "I… was already in it?" Josh said, pretending to laugh at him. The man's eyes narrowed. "Don't play games

with us, Josh. We know you worked for the fictional company Aperture Science, that you are from another

universe, and that you possess the secrets of said company. Are you willing to advance science by three centuries

or not?" Josh thought about it. "Can I punch that into a calculator? I'd like to make a happy face," he answered.

The man's response was swift and immediate, punching Josh directly in the face. Josh's neck whipped back to

stare at the man. "You're not a scientist," Josh spat. "You're nothing but a government lackey. I bet you don't

even know how to calculate the position of electrons. Or Higgs Bosons. You suck." The man was furious, and left

the room.

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Trixie was fairly happy. She could devote all her time to the portal to the other Earth, now that the production of

the other devices Aperture produced had been rendered completely automatic. Given that she had a vast army of

manufacturing devices at her disposal, this new one was going to be relatively easy. One of the mechanical arms

in front of her looked like it was malfunctioning. It dropped a Portal Device that was being disassembled, and it

broke, generating a small explosion and firing a portal. The portal landed in midair somehow, and even stranger

still, opened to reveal a human female standing in a small room, a similar gateway to her own seemingly in

progress. "Who are…?" the human questioned, looking up at Trixie. "I'm Trixie," she responded, and the portal

shimmered and closed as she finished. Darn it! Trixie yelled in her head. She had wanted to know who that was,

and why they were constructing a gateway. Luckily, now that she had gotten a fix on the technology in that room,

she could cross-reference it to figure out exactly where and what universe it came from. The answer astounded

her.

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It was the exact same universe Josh had been seen in last.

He was alive!

Chapter 4 – Inter-dimensional Doors

Trixie was elated. The two-month depression she had endured seemed like a distant memory. A thought clicked in

her mind: that gateway. She had to get working faster than ever. Shane was at Fluttershy's, staying the night,

but Trixie had as much time as she wanted. She had nothing but time, actually. Ever since a voice in her head had

started whispering in her ear, she knew exactly everything she needed to do. The voice sounded a bit familiar…

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Shane was fast asleep, having a wonderful dream about Black Mesa and Aperture Science working together.

However, this was interrupted when a familiar black, blue-armored alicorn strode up in the midst of Shane's

surroundings. "Very impressive," she said, looking around. Shane would have blinked if he could. "Nightmare

Moon?" the mare nodded. "Sorry if my approach before was a bit… zealous," she grinned at the last word, fangs

showing. "Apparently I need to work on being softer." Shane was stumped. He remembered well the last time

Nightmare Moon had visited his dreams. "Why are you here?" he asked. "Sit down, Shane Wright," she said. "We

have much to talk about."

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"When I was purged from Princess Luna," she began, her eyes narrowing at the mention of her other self, "I was

a wandering spirit, not entirely dead. I had nothing to look for but one with darkness in her heart." Shane raised

an eyebrow. "Her?" Nightmare Moon looked away. "That particular story is for another time. The point of me

invading your dreams is to inform you that you will need the human Josh in your upcoming endeavors. As will my

new bond." Shane was now thoroughly confused. "Bond? Who's that?" Nightmare Moon smiled. "Let's just say…

one who knows Josh very well."

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Fluttershy was thoroughly worried. The human was tossing and turning in his sleep, and nothing she did would

calm him down. "Oh my – please wake up," she pleaded. Shane was not listening, however. She thought back to

the short time she had spent taking care of Josh. This was nothing like that. This human wasn't as sophisticated

as Josh. "No, that's too mean," Fluttershy thought out loud.

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"Well, I'd best be going. Might I recommend you build that gateway carefully?" she said, walking away. As she

vanished, Shane's brain, dreaming though it was, processed the information. Nightmare had indicated this human

would be important in the future, in turn indicating that she knew of future events. Therefore, her hint about the

gateway might refer to a possible malfunction due to a neglect on Shane's part. And who was her 'bond'? Shane

sighed in his head and went back to his dream, but he just couldn't get it like it was before he was interrupted.

Darn. He decided to wake up.

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Fluttershy was, to say the least, astonished when Shane simply sat up. "Ow," he muttered. Then he looked up.

"Hey, is there something wrong?" Fluttershy nodded. "You were dreaming of a nightmare," she said. Shane

laughed. "You might say that." Fluttershy was confused, but assumed it was a human thing and left it alone.

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Shane considered what he had learned. Nightmare had a new 'bond', who Josh was apparently important to. Half

of Black Mesa's supposed inventions were actually stolen from Aperture, who had already invented them at least

twenty years earlier. Neurotoxin was still deadly in Equestria. How could he factor in to this? He had no idea, but

he had already significantly helped with the portal to the other Earth, so he had done some good.

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Josh was getting rather worried. Sara would probably be more worried than he was. He was tied to a chair, with

a small room with a small window, facing the traffic outside. He was gagged and bound thoroughly. Could he

move? He tried making the chair jump, and it moved about an inch. Josh would have smiled, if he could. He

managed to 'hop' his way over to the window, and gazed outside. Thankfully, the window reached to the floor, so

what Josh had to do would be somewhat less painful.

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Using all his strength, he hurled himself, still bound, through the window, some thirty stories up. He plummeted to

the ground, glass shards raining down around him, and was fortunate enough to land on a car. A small crowd

gathered around him, pointing and whispering. Josh furiously tried to speak through the gag, and finally someone

untied him. He stood up, shook himself off, thanked the person, and ran for his life.

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Sara was worried sick. Josh had been gone for well over a day now, and all efforts to contact whoever had taken

him away had been in vain. The portal's insides were nearly complete, and seeing as that had taken the better

part of the day, she felt a mixture of pride at her work, combined with Josh's informative blueprints, and fear at

what might have happened to him. She bit her knuckle and welded another part onto the round doorway. Then

she made up her mind: She was going with Josh, wherever he went. Life here was boring, and she had barely

anyone who would miss her (although some might think her a bit odd if she went off somewhere without telling

them). She composed an email to Magnus Industries, explaining her official resignation. She made dinner. She

went to bed, exhausted from stress.

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Sara was woken up by a rather sharp banging on the door. Oh no, those men have come back to take me, she

thought. She grabbed a crowbar and went to greet them.

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She opened the door not to reveal more fake authorities, but one very bloodied Josh, who only said "Finally, a

friendly face." Then he collapsed on the ground, and Sara, looking both ways, dragged him inside, putting him to

bed.

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Trixie had a feeling something important was happening, but she couldn't detect what. Her end of the portal was

going smoothly, and she was trying to find a place for it to latch onto as its destination. All she had was the other

apparent portal on that Earth, so she chose that, working on the coordinates she had managed to wrest from

extremely long algorithms and equations. Then she closed down the Enrichment Center, and went to sleep. No

sense meeting Josh without a full night's sleep, she reasoned.

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A/N: We're so close! GO PRESS THE REVIEW BUTTON!

Wheatley: DO NOT DO IT! I FORBID YOU TO PRESS THAT BUTTON!

Press it!

Wheatley: DON'T PRESS IT!

Chapter 5 – The Return

Josh was still sound asleep. Sara had tended to his many wounds, and she thought he must have done something

incredibly stupid to escape his apparent captors. Speaking of which, what the hell? Why was he kidnapped in the

first place? Sara kept agonizing over this, with no end. Josh sat up in his bed, and looked around confusedly. "…

Where am I now?" he muttered. Sara placed a tray of food on his bed. "Here," she said. "Eat. We've got a world to

go to, right?" Josh smiled warmly. "Last meal on Earth. I'm starving." He ate, and Sara packed her things. Josh had

nothing to pack but his portal device, which the g-men had thankfully forgotten to take. He swung out of bed, and

placed the tray in the dishwasher.

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"What happens if the gateway doesn't work?" Sara hesitantly asked. "Then we die," Josh answered simply. Sara

swallowed nervously. Josh looked at her. "You did build it exactly according to specification, right? Nothing left out?

Sara nodded; this was true. She had taken extra caution for this. Josh grinned. "Let's finish it up, then." With an

energy that surprised even him, he bounded over to the mostly finished door and surveyed it. "You know, you are

really good at this for someone who's never done an interdimensional portal before," he remarked. Sara blushed.

"Thanks."

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Josh's gaze drifted upward, and he saw something that surprised him: The circuitry inside the door was done. All of

it. He turned to Sara, eye twitching. "I swear, someday I'm going to find out how you managed to finish so fast," he

joked. Sara was about to respond when she heard a knock from the door. Josh's smile quickly turned to an ugly

grimace. "Allow me," he said, pushing past Sara. He opened the door to reveal the same suited workers as before,

complete with tasers and pistols. Before they could say anything, he shut the door and locked it. "It's them! Try to

work on it before they get inside!" There was a loud thumping on the door, and Josh knew that the two were trying

to break it down. "That only works in movies, idiots," Josh laughed at them. "Five parts to go!" said Sara, welding as

fast as she could. Josh steeled himself. Suddenly, sparks flew from the other side. "You're welding a DOOR open?

How incompetent are you people!" Josh yelled at them. "Three parts!" Sara shouted. Josh was nervous. They were

running out of time. The second those two burst in here, and saw his Portal Device laying on the table, they were

done for. The door was about to give way, and Josh decided on a retreat, grabbing his ASHPD and Sara's suitcase of

stuff. He retreated to the basement door, locking it.

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"What happened?" Sara asked, still welding. "They got in," Josh answered grimly. Sara was furious. Josh,

meanwhile, was taking all the heavy objects in the room and piling them against the door. On his way, he saw a

cabinet marked 'EXPLOSIVES'. He opened it, and was surprised to find quite a lot of trinitrotoluene (known to laymen

as TNT). "Hey, Sara. What would happen if we set off this whole thing at once?" he said, gesturing to the large

blocks of the white compound. Sara blushed. "It would probably destroy the whole house," she said. "Wanna do it?"

Josh grinned. Sara was about to laugh when she realized Josh was serious. And for a good reason: If those two, or

anyone for that matter, got into Equestria… it would be the end of harmony, and the beginning of something far

worse. Equestria would probably be strip-mined of its resources, and the magic of the ponies inhabiting it would be

put to more sinister work. Such as killing. She nodded grimly. She had just welded the last part on, and Josh

immediately flicked the switch. The gateway roared to life, and they ran through.

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It was nighttime in Ponyville. Trixie was asleep, and Shane was hoping for a peek at the Test Chambers. Sure, it was

a stupid idea, but he had heard that only prisoners of war could be tested, in an ironic cycle of being forced to help

their enemies improve their weapons. But no Black Mesa scientist had even seen a Test Chamber, so Shane had no

idea what to expect. He reached the entrance, and considered his next move to get inside the building.

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Josh and Sara came out into the Main AI Chamber, with Sara looking around in wonder. It was exactly like the one in

Portal 2, minus the Stalemate Associate Button and with a smaller, pony-shaped GLaDOS-like figure next to the

larger one, still far smaller than GLaDOS herself was. Josh walked over and touched a wall, tears coming to his eyes.

"It took so long," he whispered. Then he remembered the 1-foot cubes of TNT he had brought along. He quickly

tapped into the database, having a fuse and lighter delivered in seconds. He ran over to the portal, still active, and

stepped through again. He placed the cubes of TNT all around the gateway, and threaded the fuse through each

one.

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The door had almost given way, and the two lackeys had nearly made their way through. "We cannot let him get

away!" one spoke, and Josh was surprised at how deep the voice was. He stepped back through the portal, and lit

the fuse. He opened a link, and he could now see the room, full of white cubes. He turned off the actual portal,

keeping the viewing link open. He could see every minute detail as the two burst into the room, only to find their

white, cubic fate meeting them. The light became blinding, and Josh shut off the video link, retinas burning. He heard

something at the front door, and set off to find out 'just who in Equestria would come calling to the Equestrian

Enrichment Center at this time of night'.

00000

Trixie had also heard, and her alarm had woken her up. She angrily pulled herself out of bed, and walked over to the

front door.

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Shane had just opened the door (to his surprise, it was unlocked) and walked forward. Straight into two turrets on

either side of the door. "Target acquired," said one in its cheerily deadly voice. "Hi!" the other said at the same time.

In the seconds before they fired on him, Shane felt like a complete failure. He had risked his life, for what? To cast a

guilty glance at yet another thing he could not have done back in his universe? How could he have been so stupid?

For a few seconds, nothing happened. Shane opened his eyes. Nothing continued to happen. The turrets were

gazing at something in front of him, eyes shrinking in shock. "Stand down, turrets. He's a friend. …I think." Josh said,

gazing down upon the terrified figure.

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Trixie, meanwhile, had just entered the room. "Who is i-" she said grumpily, but stopped when she saw Josh

standing in front of her, a grin on his face. Her jaw dropped in pure shock, then she ran forward and hugged him.

"Now that's the greeting I was hoping for," Josh laughed. "Josh! You're back, I can't believe it, you're here!" Trixie

was both laughing and crying for joy. Her exclamations were soon stifled by a huge squee from Sara, who had just

laid eyes on her. "TRIXIE!" she yelled as she ran up. They stared into eachother's eyes. "Do I know you?" Trixie

cautiously asked. Josh laughed. "Another viewer of the show. From the other Earth, too. Seems like our adventure

paid off." Sara was stumped. Adventure? This she had to hear about.

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…After hugging as many ponies as humanly possible.

Chapter 6 – Rescue-Party

Josh was resting, and in his semiconscious opinion, he deserved it. After escaping from kidnappers, finishing

a dimensional gateway, and blowing up said gateway, he was tired. REALLY tired. Trixie, meanwhile, was

ecstatic, reminiscent of Pinkie Pie as she bounced up and down the corridors in joy. Sara had a similar

feeling. She was in Equestria! Better yet, she was in an Enrichment Center without GLaDOS! Oh, she could

do whatever she wanted. She could be a Test Subject. She could oversee the several griffin Test Subjects

shipped by the cartload as prisoners of war. Or she could have lunch. Sara, for the moment at least, chose

lunch. There was only vegetarian food here (which made sense), so she made herself a sandwich.

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It was a boring sandwich, topped with boring lettuce, boring tomatoes, and an especially boring olive.

Nonetheless, it didn't stop Sara from feeling like her happiness was about to explode inside of her.

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By the time Josh got up, it was late afternoon. He swung out of bed, confused for a moment. Then he

pumped his fist. "Record time to beat the rules of intradimensional physics? Two Months," he said jubilantly.

True to form, the camera recorded this and sent it off to the Records and Achievements Department. He

walked down the corridor, making his way to the one place he felt the most at home; the Central AI

Chamber. Spying his suit, he noted that Trixie was not controlling the facility at the moment. Her suit limply

faced the floor, no signs of activity present. Josh shrugged and attempted to climb in his own, only to find

someone already there.

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"…What are you doing, Sara?" he asked, for it was indeed Sara in the robotic body. "Er, sorry!" Sara said,

climbing out. "I just wanted to see what it felt like!" Josh laughed. "I don't blame you, it is pretty awesome."

He climbed in, and once the suit was on again, did a celebratory spin, the panels following him by doing their

own sort of 'wave'. "Oh, that felt REALLY good. Oh! Here's an idea!" he said. "Why not go about town? I

could use a few things from Sugarcube Corner." He went on to list a few pastries and treats. "Sure thing!"

Sara said, brightening. Josh watched her go from the suit, a hidden smile on his face. She was in for a

surprise. "Now…" he said, straightening his 'body' and extending a screen down to his optic.

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"What have I missed?"

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A full three hours later, Sara had just met with Pinkie Pie. True to form, Pinkie had to throw a party for her,

and rushed off to prepare. The Cakes took over the sale, which was uneventful apart from the usual small

talk ("Oh, another human?") Sara headed back into the Evergreen Forest, feeling excited and

uncomfortable. She opened the door and was met with a full blast of confetti, sending her reeling backward

and laughing. Pinkie stood in the doorway, the Party Cannon still smoking and a devilish grin on her face.

"Happy Welcome-to-Ponyville Party!" she exclaimed happily, and the party began. Trixie was there, as Josh

was still overseeing from his room. All of the important ponies were there, including Gilda (who was now

assistant Test Subject Overseer) and many more. Turrets also were present, talking to various ponies and

having fun in general (one had managed to cover itself in Repulsion Gel, and had to leave the room because

it was bouncing everywhere. Well, actually it left all by itself, but everyone agreed that it was better they

didn't get hit by a flying, gel-covered piece of metal, however cute it might be). Josh occasionally made

comments through a screen next to his camera in the room, and refilled various food items. Where he got

the refills, science may never know. Regular science, that is. Anyway, the party went quite smoothly, with

the younger ponies having access to a playground that Josh had built out of Repulsion Gel, Propulsion Gel,

and a whole lot of shock-absorbing foam. The entrance had an Aperture Science Gel-Absorbing Cover

stretched across the entrance, which would clean the foam off of the ponies' hooves when they left.

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The party went on well into the evening, and finally ended late at night. The last of the ponies, Pinkie

included, said their goodbyes, and left the building, while Josh set about disassembling the playground and

cleaning up the room in general. He was just finishing when Princess Luna walked into his chamber. "Hello,

Princess. To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?" he inquired politely, shifting uncomfortably a little in

his suit. Luna, after all, did not look happy. In fact, she looked positively anxious. "To tell the truth, we need

thy help," Luna said, eyes downcast a little.

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"Yes…?" Josh prompted. "Our royal sister the Princess Cadence has gone missing. Can you find her using

your science?" Josh thought a while. "I can do so, but I will need a sample of her DNA," he finally answered.

"Her what?" Luna said, looking confused. "Deoxyribonucleic acid. It's the genetic blueprint for any particular

life-form, and with it, I can narrow down the lifeforms with that sequence of DNA to the one you're looking

for," he explained. Luna still looked confused, and Josh sighed, exasperated. "Just bring one of her… hairs

or something. Something that came from her body." Luna nodded and left, leaving Josh alone in the

chamber. "I wasn't even aware there was a third Princess," he grumbled as he climbed out of his suit for the

night.

00000

The next day was uneventful. Josh brought out a few DNA sequencers, and the corresponding apparatus

that would tell where in the world Princess Cadence currently was. In the meantime, he did furious research

on Cadence, finding only small mentions here and there. The best he found was a fragment of the royal

birth tree, which showed a clear line of 'Princess Cadence' next to Luna and Celestia's lines. This frustrated

Josh to no end. "How am I to find this princess if I don't know who she is?" he griped to Trixie as the clock

struck one. "Which one?" said Trixie, unaware of the entire situation. Josh proceeded to explain Luna's

strange arrival and his request. Trixie thought. "Cadence… Cadence… if I remember right, she's one of the

royal family but not actually a 'princess' in the governmental sense." Josh nodded, storing this tidbit of

information in an online folder for later use.

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An hour after the sun went down, Luna once again arrived at the Enrichment Center. "One moment, testing

in progress," Josh said over the intercom. Luna impatiently waited. "Alright, he's passed out again. You can

come in," Josh finally responded, opening the door from the lobby to his chamber. "We have the hairs thou

requested," Luna said, levitating a group of purple, pink and yellow hairs. "Excellent! Incidentally, where did

you get them?" Now Luna shifted uncomfortably. "We had to ask the royal barber. He… keeps hairs of each

of the princesses." If Josh's suit had any eyebrows, they would have been raised. "Really? Well, lucky for us

that he did. If you don't mind…" he said, taking the hairs with a robotic arm and placing them into the

sequencer. "This determines, down to a Thymine, Princess Cadence's exact genetic blueprint." Josh

explained, as the hairs were slowly fed down the machine's intake slot and the results processed on-

screen. The results were then fed to the program Josh had developed, showing a full-globe map. The map

zoomed out of Equestria to the world, and then rapidly zoomed in. "Is that…?" Luna asked. Josh was

surprised as well. "It is. The Griffin Nation Maximum-Security Prison." Josh answered.

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Luna's aura immediately burst out, raging in a whirling tornado of anger around her. Josh tried to resist

being pushed by the winds, but quickly gave up trying, as Luna was far too furious. She made to leave,

when Josh stopped her by closing the door. "Wait just one moment! That is a maximum-security prison

you're flying into. Emphasis on maximum." Luna turned to face him. "Are you saying I should not rescue my

sister?" Josh shook his head violently. "No, I'm saying that I can help you yet. Give me a moment, I'll need

some sort of interface. I wonder if any of the Cooperative Testing Bots are active…" he muttered as he

brought out a short, squat robot with a blue optic. It looked half-finished in Luna's opinion. A robotic claw

activated something within the central sphere, and the core flickered to life, looking around cautiously.

"Good morning, ATLAS," Josh said.

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"Today, I have a special mission for you that does not involve your partner. However, I will be using you as

my eyes and ears. Is that clear?" ATLAS nodded as a chip was installed behind his optic. "I'm fully

connected. I can see everything." Josh said from both his and the robot's speakers. " In addition, you will be

given this laser cutting and EMP tool, just in case," Josh said, while handing ATLAS something that looked

like a smooth, circular-barreled gun. "Is this necessary?" Luna impatiently questioned. "Completely. Magic

might not be able to open some doors, but a laser can open all. The EMP can instantly stun guards. Now we

can go." ATLAS raced out the doors, and Luna followed, catching up to and then passing him, to which

ATLAS ran harder. He had also been equipped with the Gel Boots, and was now racing Luna across the

countryside.

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"Sister!" Celestia cried as she teleported in from above. "I sensed your anger. What is going on? And who is

this?" the Princess of the Sun questioned as she raced alongside Luna. "This is Josh, through one of my

testing robots named ATLAS. We are currently rescuing Princess Cadence from the Griffin Nation Maximum

Security Prison," Josh explained as ATLAS ran. Celestia nodded, her expression hardening, and continued

with them.

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After some hours of flying and running, with only ATLAS able to go continuously (as he didn't get tired), they

arrived at the Equestrian border. The border guards were somewhat surprised to see both of their

princesses and a metal ball with legs and arms racing past, and didn't stop them. They were simply too

confused to do anything, in fact.

00000

After avoiding most of the towns and cities, the trio came to an imposing stone building. "Well, here we

are," Josh said. "I don't suppose there's a front door?" Celestia almost laughed. "You would try getting in

through the front door? We'd be spotted and arrested immediately." ATLAS actually did laugh in his odd

manner of speech, causing the two ponies to look up in surprise. "He can talk?" Luna questioned. "Yes, but

he speaks a language that neither of you would recognize." ATLAS then proceeded to say something in his

language. "The wall, Blue. We need to get the inner wall." Josh answered the question. 'Blue' immediately

sprinted over to the nearest wall and began cutting through it with his laser tool. "Is that thing melting solid

stone?" Celestia asked, marveling at yet another technological innovation.

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Chapter 7 – Explosive Rhythm

When the laser had finished cutting through the rock, ATLAS (or Blue as we will now call him) gave the wall a

gentle tap. It fell backwards, disintegrating as it hit the wall, and the trio moved through. "How come no

alarms have gone off yet?" Luna asked cautiously. "I jammed their primitive signals. It was easy, really."

Josh answered from Blue. Blue repeated his amazing wall-busting technique on the inner wall, and then

they were inside.

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The place was off-white, with simple prison cells on the top and more complex ones going down.

Fortunately, they were labeled. "Says we're in block D8," Josh muttered. "I can use that to give you guys a

good idea of where to go. Ah, perfect! Head to block A6, for Prisoners of War. She should be on floor six, cell

18A. Can either of you turn the three of us invisible?" Celestia nodded, horn glowing. Josh made Blue look

down at his hands. "Visible to only oneself? Interesting…" Josh noted. Blue raced forward, startling the two

princesses into following.

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As they passed through the C-block of the huge prison, they saw guards everywhere, and nearly bumped

into more than a few. Josh picked up on a conversation from across the room they were passing. "…And the

alarm is down?" a voice inquired. "Yes sir. We'll have it up in a second," a younger voice answered. Josh

made Blue turn a corner into a blocked-off, guardless corridor. "Did you hear that? They know," Josh said

darkly. "Fortunately for us, there's no way they can get past my handiwork on the signal. Unfortunately,

they're suspicious. We'll have to hurry." Luna and Celestia nodded grimly.

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The rest of the prison passed by in a blur until they came to something that looked suspiciously familiar.

"Isn't that the statue of Discord?" Josh muttered. Celestia looked surprised. "That was missing from the

grounds this morning. What do they plan to do with it?" Blue shrugged, and sauntered onward, dodging a

guard. Celestia and Luna looked at eachother and followed.

00000

"We're in block A, and no one has found us yet," Josh muttered. "This could be very good or very bad." Luna

raised an eyebrow. "Like, how bad?" Blue stretched out his arms as wide as they could go. "As Blue is so

thoughtfully saying, 'Like, this-is-a-trap bad'." Celestia nearly laughed. "You're thinking too far ahead. They

would never do something like that?" Blue rolled his optic, and though she couldn't see, Luna was

absolutely sure LaECOS was doing the same. "This is war, Celestia. Granted, I base my knowledge of war

tactics off of human strategy, which is generally a lot less friendly, the concept of winning by any means

necessary should remain the same. Therefore, proceed with caution." Celestia held up a hoof. "What do you

mean, 'less friendly'? What strategy have you developed to win a war?" Blue looked agitated, and it

appeared that Josh was conversing with him, as occasionally he would comment in his unintelligible

language. "A weapon so destructive that entire countries could be wiped out in under a second. A weapon

that our entire world banned it from military use," Josh said grimly. "The atomic bomb."

00000

When they reached floor six, the two ponies flying and Blue scaling the walls and stairs, they saw a crude

arrow marked "IMPORTANT PRISONER" pointing to Cadence's cell. "If this was a trap, they couldn't make it

any more obvious. That looks like it was hastily scribbled with a marker," Josh commented. Blue melted the

lock, and opened the door to reveal Princess Cadence. She looked the worse for wear, bound and gagged.

Around her were several inconspicuous crates. "Hold on. Do NOT enter this room." Josh warned, as he used

an X-ray to scan the room. "I was right, this is a trap. Those crates are filled with explosives, and the

tripwires are across the entire door. Cadence, can you hear me?" Josh called in a louder tone. Cadence

nodded and made frantic motions to the explosives. "Blue. Listen carefully. On the laser/EMP tool, switch the

mode to 'Emergency'. This makes the device a highly unstable portal device temporarily. Celestia, Luna, try

to free some others. This is going to be a BIG explosion."

00000

The two immediately left to coax other prisoners out, and sometimes teleporting them out instantly.

Meanwhile, Blue cautiously placed a portal on the wall next to him and another on Cadence's chair. The chair

slid through and Blue helped Cadence through and out of her restraints. "Thank you," she said in the most

melodic voice Josh had ever heard. They heard guards coming into the room and Celestia and Luna flew

over. "We just finished, let's get out of here! Perhaps we still have-" Celestia could not finish her sentence,

as the room erupted in a fiery conflagration sure to engulf them all. However, before it even touched Blue's

metallic skin, time appeared to stop. "Time? Is that what you need?" a familiar snarky voice said. Nightmare

Moon, appearing seemingly out of nowhere, tapped Blue on the shoulder, and Blue found he could move

again.

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"In case you're wondering, I'm going to do you a favor and let you live for now. As for my sisters, what do

you think?" Nightmare surveyed the scene with disdain. Celestia's face was frozen in an expression of

horror that would have been funny at any other time. "Why are you helping me?" Josh said, experiencing

the curious effect of being frozen in time from another being's body. "A favor from a friend," Nightmare said

dismissively. "Save the princesses too. As much as you want to take over Equestria, it needs to have

something to take over," Josh said irritably. "Okay, fine. But this is our little secret." There was a flash of

white, and then total darkness.

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The three princesses woke up in a daze. They were in the Enrichment Center, slumped on the floor. Celestia

took a while to adjust to the bright white lights, and saw LaECOS looking down at her. "Congratulations.

You have been asleep for approximately 876 minutes." Celestia looked around. "How did we get here? I

remember the room exploding, and then nothing. "Oh, I'm sure a guardian angel came along and saved us,"

Josh said, attempting a joking tone. "What's an angel?" Luna asked. Josh gently laughed. "That was a joke,

I have no idea. Angels are mythical humans with wings." Cadence looked around. "What is this place?"

LaECOS chuckled gently. "This is the Aperture Science Equestrian Enrichment Center. I am known as

LaECOS, but my real name is Josh Stevenson. If you've heard the news, I seem to have started a war

between two nations, and now I'm helping to end it." Sara walked into the room and saw the three ponies

slumped on the floor. "Omigosh! Are you okay?" Sara cried, running up to Celestia. Celestia nodded. "I'm

fine, thanks to… whatever saved us. Are you sure you detected nothing?" she asked Josh. "No, nothing, at

all. Sensors entirely blank," LaECOS said, a bare hint of nervousness in his tone that only a thousand years

of honed political skills allowed Celestia to detect. "Okay then," she finally said. "We must be off, we do

have a country to run." LaECOS said his goodbyes, and Luna stopped just out the door, turning back to him.

"We thank you for helping us," she said sincerely. LaECOS nodded. "Of course, anytime." The door then

closed.

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Chapter 8 – All that Effort for Nothing

The rest of the day was uneventful until Shane came a-knocking on the Enrichment Center. "Hey, open up! It's

me, Shane!" he called loudly. The camera above the door turned to look at him. "I can hear you just fine, no need

to shout," LaECOS calmly answered. "Oh. Can I enter? I've got stuff to discuss." Shane said. "What's the

password?" LaECOS teasingly replied. "Password!" Shane answered, going along with it. "Come on in," LaECOS

answered, and the door opened of its own accord.

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Shane walked in to see Trixie and Sara having a discussion over tea. "So, you're the Black Mesa guy, huh?" Sara

said, unimpressed. Shane rolled his eyes and took a seat. "Now, now, children, this should be a civil environment.

If you're going to fight amongst yourselves, aim for the head." All three took one look at the camera and burst

into peals of laughter. Blue popped his head around the doorway of the kitchen with an apron and chef's hat,

angrily chattering at them. "He says he needs concentration if he's to cook your panini." Shane laughed even

harder, causing Blue to throw a spork at him. "He says he's entirely serious. And that – Oh. Blue, there's no way

I'm saying that to them. No, seriously, that's completely ridiculous." Blue crossed his arms and muttered

something, returning to the kitchen. "How do you understand him, anyway?" Trixie asked, sipping some tea. "He

speaks in binary. Not too hard, once you know what's a one and what's a zero." Shane would have rolled his

eyes again, but Blue was ominously staring at him from the doorway.

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"So, what to do?" LaECOS mused, cutting his voice off from the monitors. He went back to watching one of the

current testing Subjects. "Congratulations on completing that aesthetically designed, non-scientific chamber. I'm

sure if anyone were around, they would congratulate you upon completing such a meaningless puzzle." The

griffin, male and sinewy in musculature, glanced up at the camera and growled. "Now, let's see… The next

chamber is exceedingly deadly. There is a ninety-five percent chance you will die in it, and then I will be forced to

bring yet another subject off the cryosleep line. We have hundreds, you know. This war was the best thing to

ever happen to testing." The griffin flew up to the camera and was attempting to break it off the wall. "… You do

know that this is hooked in place with steel rebar, right? You couldn't break it if you had the laws of physics on

your side. Which, unfortunately for you, you don't." Josh turned off the monitor, bored. The pits were filled with

fake acid, and would only leave an uncomfortable itch after a few seconds. Not like real acid, where the subject

would have decomposed almost as soon as they were immersed.

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Some hours earlier, 'Princess Cadance' walked around the courtyard of Canterlot Castle. Nopony had yet

suspected that she was not the real Princess Cadance, and she had already assumed the place of Shining

Armor's bride-to-be. "Take out the head…" the queen changeling muttered to herself. She had a ridiculously

dangerous, but potentially game-changing idea. "And they said I wasn't bright enough to do royal duties," she

said, smirking as she flew off to Ponyville. There was only one being who had the gullibility to attempt something

this crazy.

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Sara, Trixie and Shane were interrupted by a knock on the door. "Come on in," LaECOS called momentarily before

returning to berating and mocking Test Subjects. Princess Cadence walked in regally, smiling at Trixie before

staring at Sara and Shane. "How many of you are there?" she asked, somewhat surprised. "Oh, you know, at

least two universes full," Shane said offhandedly while he took in Cadence. She stood only slightly taller than a

regular pony, owing to her being the niece of Celestia. "I'd like to speak to the manager, please," she said,

attempting a smile. Trixie pointed down the hallway. "Down there, through the last door on the end. He's testing

right now, so you might have to wait a bit." Cadance thanked her and continued walking.

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"And you are a horrible excuse for a sentient, carbon-based life-" LaECOS stated, interrupting himself as he

noticed Cadance. "One moment, please." He said to her, and she nodded. "-Form. Ignore the interruption. Now, if

you'll excuse me, which you will because you don't have any say at all, you're boring me, and thus I shall talk to

someone more interesting. Goodbye." He then swiveled to face her, Cadance flinching. Gentle laughter issued

from the thing's head, as its single yellow eye stared directly at her. "That's a common reaction. Now, what can I

do you for?" Cadance gulped, still a little shocked. "I thought you were the blue-eyed, shorter robot. What

happened to him?" LaECOS rolled his eyes. "Ever since I activated him, he's been attempting to cook nonstop. He

likes it, and most of his recipes don't explode, so we leave him be." Cadance nodded. "So, you're made of metal?"

she asked. "Not entirely. I'm human on the inside, this is just an extremely handy suit made of metal."

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'Cadance' took a bit to steady herself before speaking again. "I have a plan to end the war," she said, hating how

she couldn't sound any bolder. She needed to win him over. "Yes?" LaECOS answered. "What if we… kidnapped

the griffins' king?" she said, finally getting her idea out to the open. Cadance watched LaECOS as he watched

her, both fully expecting the other to burst into laughter. Then, a thoughtful look came into the yellow optic as he

swiveled around to examine a screen that flickered to life. "This… could work. We'd need a team of specialists,

though. Not like you, more… trained. No offense." Cadance laughed. "None taken, I don't think I'd ever want to go

back there." LaECOS turned to look at her. "This would have to be done with the knowledge of our current

monarchs to be effective." 'Cadance' sighed, though she was practically screaming in triumph on the inside. She

had done it! Now he would be out of the way for the next few days, trying to devise a strategy.

00000

Two days after Cadance left to attend her wedding, Josh heard of the imposter's trickery (Twilight had explained

in detail). Then, to his surprise and delight, he received a package: The trussed-up queen of shapeshifters

herself, held by Princess Luna. "Dost thou still accept subjects for testing?" she inquired, reverting to her older

tongue. "Always. Is this the insect I keep hearing about?" he casually responded, smirking at the queen, who

was glaring at him. "Yes. We believe that this was the thing we 'rescued'." Luna shook her head mournfully. "Such

an endeavor, for nothing more than an impostor… We invited her right into our doors." Josh glared at the queen

changeling. "I'll be sure to take care of her," he promised. She was dragged inside by a robotic arm, into the

waiting hooves of Trixie. "Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in," she said, grinning. "Mmph!" the queen

attempted to speak with a gag in her mouth. "I'm sorry, I can't understand you. I also don't care." Trixie dragged

her over to a Relaxation Vault, the glass walls lowering so the queen could be placed inside. "Have fun testing,"

Trixie said, bored. "I'm gonna go get a drink." She left, despite the queen's muffled screaming in terror through

her gag.

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A/N: OMG FanFiction! It's been so long! HI!

Twilight: That Princess Cadance is a Spy! Oh, and review.

Chapter 9 – Escape?

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Queen Chrysalis was certainly not having an enjoyable day. Her plan had been ruined by that insipid Twilight

Sparkle, she had been captured, and perhaps worst of all, that robot had messed with her magic. "After carefully

studying the magical properties of a unicorn's horn, and being inexplicably drunk, we invented a gas that inhibits

magical ability by shutting down your horn's nervous system." The queen didn't actually care about the lecture,

she cared that she had been in Test Chamber 2 for an hour and still hadn't figured out how to fire the Portal

Device, which the human had said 'was specifically adapted to ponies'. "Would it be alright if I killed myself now?"

she asked, half-jokingly. To her surprise, she received a response. "No, I would like you to actually try doing the

tests. I have no patience for a suicidal Test Subject," the smooth, robotic voice said. Chrysalis noticed a panel on

the wall which looked… odd. She poked it curiously. Meanwhile, LaECOS watched, with growing unease. That

panel looked dangerously unstable, and there was a Subject right next to her.

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Chrysalis picked up on this, of course. She tried bashing the wall in with her body, and to her surprise, it

crumbled. She spilled out into a hallway, a griffin looking at her in surprise. She did not, however, notice the

robotic arm sneaking up behind her. She screamed, and begged for help as the arm pulled her back into her

chamber. The wall panel was quickly replaced, and Chrysalis laid down on the floor, all hope lost once again. Why

couldn't she win, just once?

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LaECOS sighed in irritation. Surely he had better things to do than this. He turned his attention away for a

moment to work on his pet project(s). The first was obviously the most important. Now, where was that

modification protocol? He found it, and selected 'Apply to: Turret Production Facility'. This could get interesting… he

thought.

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A few hours later, Chrysalis was tired. After being hurled through the air by these little oblong black things called

"Aerial Faith Plates" by the robot, and her wings duct-taped together, she felt like just giving up on life. Then she

spotted a small crack in the top-left corner of the chamber. She grinned evilly. How could that omnipotent,

perfectionist 'bot have overlooked this? She quickly transformed into a bee and flew through the gap, exiting the

chamber.

00000

Meanwhile, Josh was on lunch break, completely ignoring his latest Test Subject. Alarms went off, and he picked

up a headset. "Lockdown, Code 11 – Escaped Subject," he said, almost nonplussed with the fact that one of the

most dangerous Test Subjects had escaped.

00000

Fluttershy was about to knock on the front door of the Enrichment Center when a loud Klaxon alarm sounded.

She screamed in terror and jumped back, cowering as the alarm continued to peal through the midday sounds.

"Fluttershy? Is that you?" Josh said from an intercom next to the camera above the front door. "Okay, don't move.

This is important." He said as a green beam spread out over her, slowly moving down. There was a beep. "Okay,

thank science. You really are Fluttershy." Fluttershy was now thoroughly confused. "Of course… why wouldn't I

be?" she said to the camera. "Can you go back and tell Twilight Queen Chrysalis has escaped from her chamber?"

he said. Fluttershy paled. "Oh my – Absolutely!" she said, flying as fast as she could.

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Sara, Shane and Trixie also heard the lockdown, being outside the facility on a picnic (Josh had stayed behind to

make sure nothing happened). "What is that? Sounds like the alarm that we had… when something went wrong…

that we stole from Aperture…" Shane didn't even want to finish his sentence, not least due to his admitting to

Black Mesa's little-known patent thievery. Trixie would have lectured him on this, but given that for an experiment

in Aperture to be have gone wrong, it would have had to have gone horribly, HORRIBLY wrong, she decided now

was not the time.

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"Should we head back and help?" she asked. "No, Josh has the machines in case he dies. So, what could've

happened that made Josh panic enough to issue a lockdown?" Sara wondered out loud. "I'd guess an escaped

Test Subject, but who would be so dangerous…" Then, it dawned on Trixie. "Run! We have to warn the others!"

she said, getting up and running at a fast gallop. "Humans don't run this fast!" Shane argued as he struggled to

keep up.

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Josh whistled cheerfully as he walked through the closed-down facility. That queen wasn't getting out of here,

alive or dead. All testing had been suspended, the subjects stuck in their elevators while "Maintenance

Underway" signs flashed at them. It was a common trick to not let subjects know escape was possible. Josh

fingered his weapons. He had brought a fully automatic shotgun, the magic-inhibiting gas which he had forgotten

to fill the last chamber with, and a tranquilizer gun. No taking chances when a threat to Equestria this big was on

the loose. He stepped out onto a corridor and came face-to-face with… himself?

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It was a mirror. Josh would have laughed at the absurdity of it, but concentrated on shooting it first. "Don't let the

mirrors catch you," he muttered to himself. "That's how the man finds you." A bloodcurdling scream was heard in

the next room. Josh, taking his time, walked over. This could only be a trap, after all.

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Opening the door, he saw Shane standing over Sara, a pistol in his hands. "I'm so sorry, man. I thought she was

the escaped queen." Josh rolled his eyes. "One: You two are attached by the feet. I guess you can't split into two

things. Two: I'm not nearly that stupid. The others are on a picnic. Three: I honestly don't care, we can bring the

dead back to life anyway." He sprayed the gas at the queen, and unable to keep her form, she melted back into

her changeling self. "Very well done," she said. "But how are you going to get past me? I have other weapons

besides deception." In response, Josh took aim with his auto-shotgun and shot off her horn. Chrysalis screamed

in pain. "Oh, don't be such a baby. Horns grow back!" Josh said. He shot the tranq-gun at her, and she dropped

like a stone. As she lost consciousness, Josh leaned down and whispered in her ear, "No they don't." He had a

robotic arm escort her to cryosleep, and he watched as her life support slowly came on. "Sweet dreams, you

monster," he said, wondering if deep down, she heard him. Oh well. He turned off the alarm, and wandered off to

continue what he was doing before this annoying setback.

A/N: This chapter was a bit iffy... what do you guys and gals think?

Chapter 10 – The Griffins are Bad at War

Chrsyalis woke up with a horrible pain in her head. What had happened? Also, something felt… missing. She reached up to feel her twisted horn, and felt

nothing. She felt ever more frantically. Still nothing. She screamed in frustration. "Oh, shut up," a female voice said on the intercom of the chamber she

was in. Chrsyalis narrowed her eyes. This was not the male who normally tormented her, nor the female blue pony that she met shortly before testing.

"This is Sara. New to the whole 'testing' thing, but that doesn't mean you get any slack. "Why don't you come over here and say that to my face?"

Chrysalis said slyly. There was a long pause on the other said. "…Do you think I'm stupid?" the new voice responded. "No, but it was worth a try,"

Chrysalis replied. A door opened in her chamber, and she calmly and serenely walked through it. No more getting angry, or scared, or insulted, she

thought to herself. She would face whatever this hell had to throw at her with the dignity and poise that befitted a true queen.

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As she entered the next room, she heard a faint "Are you still there?" She looked up at a camera that was affixed to the walls. "Aren't you not supposed

to use bullets for your turrets?" she inquired. To her surprise, 'Sara' answered. "No, we can't. That's the fun part," she smugly replied. Chrysalis arched an

eye. The fun part? Well, better go figure it out. She looked around. A cube was resting on a spinning panel, and she attempted to grab it. The panel

moved away from her teasingly before finally giving up its prize. Chrysalis looked around for a button, and found on… on the ceiling? How was she

supposed to do this? Would the room rotate somehow? She found her answer in a blue funnel of churning liquid directly below the button, apparently

defying gravity. She placed the cube in, hoping something would happen. To her slight surprise, the cube was carried by the funnel up to the button,

where it stayed. She sauntered off to the next part of this long room. Or, she would've, but she jumped back when a dent appeared, literally out of

nowhere, right in front of her. She looked up, searching for the source of this, and found a turret behind her on a high ledge, where she couldn't have

seen it from the other way. It opened its casing and began firing at her, but no visible bullets could be seen. Suddenly, Chrysalis felt as though a

sledgehammer had hit her on the head. She collapsed to the ground, and the last thing she heard before she blacked out was "Goodnight."

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"It works! Yeah!" Sara spun around enthusiastically as Josh watched. "Bullets made of sound," he chuckled. "Brilliant. I hope you'll modify the existing

turrets as well as those on the battlefield already?" Sara stared. "How do we do that, recall all the turrets?" Josh shook his head, walked over to the

computer next to the Aperture Science Red Phone, and typed in a few commands. A schematic of a turret was brought up, and he zoomed in. He kept

zooming, past the gears and wires, until all that was visible were a bunch of small, rectangular bug-shaped things. "Nanobots," he said cheerily. "We put

them in everything, and if someone comes up with a more efficient design than what we have, everything can be changed at a moment's notice. Just tell

all the nanobots in all the turrets to copy the new master-turret, which you can take from that chamber once Chrysalis is done with it, and the nanos will

do the rest!" Sara blinked. Nanobots. Of course.

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Shane was discussing the finer points of quantum physics with Trixie and Twilight, though Twilight was absolutely lost on the discussion (though she was

taking notes). "But then why would effects happen before causes?" Shane was questioning. "It's one of the many quirks of the quantum dimension,"

Trixie explained. "Like quantum foam bubbles, and the Higgs Boson, and all that…" Twilight zoned out. The duo (and Twilight) continued discussing the

strange world of the quantum level all the way back to the facility, where they saw Josh laughing hysterically. "S' up with you?" Shane questioned, a smile

on his face already. "Look at this!" Josh said, handing a letter over. "Griffin Embassy would like to negotiate a peace agreement with Equestria and

Aperture Science Industries. Signed by… I don't know who these griffins are." Shane read. Trixie levitated the note over to her. "These are members of

the royal council over there," she stated blandly. "They control the legal stuff, the king does the rest." Shane raised an eyebrow. "Well, that's good if they

want to end the war." Josh rolled his eyes in response. "They started it, they're probably just now realizing the mistake they made." Nevertheless,

preparations were made. Trixie and Sara stayed behind to guard the facility, while Josh, Shane, and Twilight got ready for a trip through griffin country.

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While Shane and Josh were packing in their respective rooms (Shane had been given temporary lodging at Aperture), Josh came in and tossed a backpack

his way. "Nice, but I already have one." Shane said. Josh shook his head and thrust the backpack at Shane. "Try putting a few things in it, you'll see how

useful it is." Shane shrugged and tried it out. He put a shirt in. When he looked in the backpack, it was gone. "What kind of prank is this? A bottomless

backpack?" He really liked that shirt. In fact, he wanted it back immediately. He reached in and was surprised to find that it had reappeared just as rapidly

as its original disappearance. "What…?" Shane said confusedly. He moved all his stuff, including what had been in a suitcase he'd found, into the

backpack, finding that it all disappeared when he removed his hand from the backpack. Even better, no matter how much stuff he put in, it never gained

any weight. "Man, I could hike a mile with a house in this thing!" he thought out loud. Then he remembered; Black Mesa had a similar system. That they

probably stole from Aperture. He popped into Josh's room, and held up the backpack. "You guys invented this thing, right?" Josh laughed. "The backpack,

yes. The concept, no. That was actually Black Mesa if I remember right, so the security guards and HEV operatives could carry all their guns and crystal

samples and stuff." Shane raised a fist in triumph. "Yes! Black Mesa actually did something original!" Josh grinned. "Well, they discovered Xen too," he

said.

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Twilight, being the punctual student that she was, was sending a letter to Princess Celestia and the embassy at the same time. "And that we will do our

best to negotiate a peace agreement with the griffins so that we may resume in cordial relations. Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle." Spike finished

writing and looked up. "…Was that for the letter to Celestia or the griffins?" Twilight groaned. "Well, it's not easy writing two letters at the same time, I

keep getting all mixed up!" Twilight reviewed the two letters in her head. "Alright," she said, attempting a smile, "let's start again. Ready? Go. Dear

Princess Celestia…"

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A/N: What an absurdly long hiatus! This chapter isn't quite up to snuff, I think, but it makes for a good bridge for when they actually Meet the

Griffins! Lots of action there. And now, to go back on hiatus! :D

Chapter 11 – Fearless?

After quite a bit of last-minute packing, and some advice from Rarity on griffin fashion (after all, Twilight recommended the best first impression possible), the group of

three were ready to go. Spike had wanted to come, but had to keep the library running. As they walked down the path, Shane noted the disturbing lack of technology.

Josh noticed Shane looking at him. "What?" he questioned. "Nothing, it's just… no gear? Tools, weapons, something to show off?" Josh shrugged. "Nah, not yet. If they

ask, I've got small stuff." Shane grinned, trying not to laugh. The small stuff was almost definitely some sort of microtech or something. This was going to be good. As

they proceeded through the Everfree Forest for a direct shortcut to the griffin kingdom, it grew increasingly darker. "Wasn't it around 6 AM when we left?" Josh

wondered. Twilight shuddered. "The Everfree Forest operates on its own time. We'd better hurry, I don't want to meet some of the things in here…"

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Two hours later, they were deep in the forest when they heard a roar to their left. "Manticore?" Shane wondered aloud. "No, not deep enough. Twilight, any guesses?"

Twilight started a faster walk, almost galloping, and the two humans broke into a jog. "None of them herbivorous, and none of them friendly." Twilight answered after a

few seconds. "I see a light up ahead." Shane puffed. He was more fit than half the scientists at Black Mesa, but that wasn't saying much. They came to the light and

were surprised to discover it was a house. "Who would live out here? Not even Zecora lives this deep," Twilight wondered. Josh peeked inside, and found a small pony

sleeping on a rug in front of him, twitching slightly. It rolled over, and Josh could see it had bite marks all over it. Josh quickly shut the door. "I've seen enough horror

movies on PsychoNite to know where this is going," Josh said, leading the others quickly away from the house. "PsychoNite?" Shane asked. "It was every Sunday, the

psychology department watched our reactions to the scariest movies they could find." Shane nodded and kept running. Meanwhile, the forest was seemingly melting

around them into a blur of colors. "Keep running straight!" Josh yelled as he dodged a lump of seemingly liquid tree.

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Finally, they burst out into a bright clearing. Josh looked around suspiciously. "That went… surprisingly well," he remarked. "No it didn't, we're still in the middle of the

forest," Shane said, showing them a GPS he had found (and had calibrated to Equestria). "Well, shoot." Josh said. "What now?" Twilight said, looking around. The

clearing wasn't much to look at, perhaps a thirty-foot circle of bright, sunlit grass. "Welp, we better start running," Josh remarked casually. "Why?" Twilight said.

"Twilight, where is this sunlight coming from?" Josh answered. With a sinking feeling, Twilight looked up to discover that there was no sun in the sky. All three started

running just as a lightning bolt pierced the ground under them. "I've heard of scary, but this is outright murderous!" Shane yelled as he was nearly hit by another bolt

from nowhere. He ducked, rolled and screamed as another bolt hit the ground next to him. "The creatures in the forest respond to your innermost fears and

personality. Are you afraid of lightning?" Twilight shouted back as she dodged a bolt herself. "Yeah, how 'bout you guys?" Shane replied, wondering if their fears were

quite as mundane as his. "All the usuals for a person like me; failure, threats to Equestria, Nightmare Moon, all that," Twilight answered. "Josh? You got any fears we

should know about?" Shane shouted. There was no reply. There was also no sign of Josh.

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Josh opened his eyes, confusedly. A bolt of lightning had hit him, and then… what? He was in a blank nothingness, white everywhere. "This is my worst fear? Isolation?

You've got a lot to learn, forest, I was doing this dance for years before Aperture." He took a step forward, or what he defined as forward. The 'ground' was like

walking on air with those boots he made a while ago, no feeling whatsoever. In fact, he had no way to tell whether he had even stepped forward. He closed his eyes,

the white was starting to hurt. Suddenly, a shadow loomed over the patterns of his seared retinas. Josh opened his eyes to see two people, a man and a woman,

looking down at him. The woman seemed to resemble him, and so did the man to a lesser extent. "It's okay, son," the woman said. "You're safe now."

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"You're my parents." Josh stated, expressionless. "Why, yes, sweetie! We're so glad you came!" the woman said. "My own boy, so grown-up…" the man mused, tears

in his eyes. "I have a few questions," Josh said, looking at them. "Sure, fire away." The man grinned. "How stupid do you think I am? If you were really my parents, you

would be embarrassed. You abandoned me on a doorstep. If you were even real people, you would wonder what I've been doing. Also, you're the 'perfect parents' I

used to use as a psychological comfort back when I was a kid, and I've never actually met either of you, which makes me either a psychic or you fake. I'm willing to bet

all my money on the latter." The two people were stunned for a second. Then the girl began to scream. The man began to howl too. Louder and louder, their faces

stretching to seemingly impossible angles, until Josh couldn't stand it. He slapped the two in the face, and they immediately stopped, shocked. "I never liked you. I like

my new friends better!" The woman seemed to want to say something, but didn't. The man's jaw was set, eyes hard. Suddenly, they dissolved into dust, and Josh

could hear "Goodbye, son…" as though carried on an intangible breeze. "Goodbye, mom. Goodbye, dad. I miss you." Josh said, a tear running down his face. He walked

onward through the white haze, never looking back.

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Twilight was dodging a bolt when another struck her right in the face. She closed her eyes and awaited the pain, but none came. She opened her eyes to stare directly

into the face of Discord. "Why, hello, sweetheart!" he crowed. "I'm here to reveal to you… your worst nightmare." He swept aside a curtain behind Twilight to reveal

Queen Chrysalis and Nightmare Moon, grinning evilly. Princess Celestia was in a cage behind them. "We're going to enslave you, and if you resist, your princess dies,"

Chrysalis said with relish. Nightmare Moon laughed evilly. All three advanced on Twilight, who cowered in fear… to watch as Nightmare Moon turned and kicked

Chrysalis in the chest. Chrysalis stared in shock as she sailed across the stage, before hitting the wall and slumping to the floor. "Run, Sparkle! Run straight at the

curtain and don't look back!" Nightmare Moon bellowed as she fought Discord, protecting both herself and Twilight with a green wall of magic. Twilight did as she

asked, and burst right through the wall, running into Josh.

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"You!" they both said, and assumed fighting stances, Twilight with a ready spell, Josh with his knife. "How do we know we're real to each other?" Josh said, still looking

at Twilight with suspicion. "What's the answer to the Schrodinger's cat paradox?" Twilight questioned, parroting a conundrum Josh had taught her earlier. "Well, it

really depends on either of the two scenarios, either the cat could be dead or alive…" Josh's mouth was zipped up by magic. "Alright, you're real." Twilight laughed. The

world shook, causing both of them to stumble and trip in alarm. "…Try laughing again." Josh said. "Well, it's not that easy, you know!" Twilight retorted. "Imagine a

gigantic cannon for the sole purpose of targeting and hitting Rainbow Dash with a pie," Josh replied. Twilight stifled a giggle, and the 'world' shook again. "A Test

Subject who gets a cheesecake instead of a portal gun," Twilight responded, sending Josh into peals of laughter. The world shattered into shards of white against a

dark canvas, and the two fell into another pit of pure black.

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Shane was the last one on the field. Josh had simply disappeared, Twilight doing the same thing moments later. He had nearly reached the end of the field. He could do

it! The ground apparently chose that time to simply sink into a crater shape, ever deeper. Shane desperately grabbed at handfuls of grass, now brown and brittle.

Finally, the crater opened up, and Shane fell into a room. There was only one light, and a man in a blue suit and red tie sat in a chair. It was the same person from

Black Mesa, the g-man! Seeing that Shane had arrived, the man straightened his tie and smiled slightly. "You're looking well, Shane," the man commented in his

strange, unearthly voice. "But also quite, confused. You are, wondering why I'm here, right?" Shane could do nothing but nod. "Well, I did want to check in on my little

experiment," the man said. "Who are you? What do you want from me?" Shane hesitatingly asked. "You are one of, the last, of Black Mesa," the man answered. "You

have to survive, even if you do so in an, unusual, location. I could take you back, if you wish?" The man questioned. Shane was torn. He could go back to Black Mesa,

possibly back to the time when everyone was alive (he assumed they had all somehow died). But, he had friends here. And ponies! "…No." Shane said, decided. "I

can't leave my friends now. We have too much to do." The g-man frowned, apparently displeased with his answer. "Now, I believe your, friends (Distastefully spoken,

Shane noted), are wondering where you are…" the man got up and simply walked out of the room.

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Twilight and Josh burst in a moment later, startling Shane. "Shane! There you are!" Twilight said. Shane stood up awkwardly, feeling the blood rush back into his legs.

The floor opened out from under them, and they fell into the same clearing they left, only free of lightning bolts. "Looks like we're out, there's the sun," Josh noted. The

three looked at each other for a minute, wondering what stories each had to tell and what fears each had faced. "Let's get going," Josh said after a while of this. "I

was about to say the same thing," Shane said, Twilight nodding her assent. There was a new path at the end of the clearing, and it was invitingly sunny. The trio

walked onward, chatting a bit to relieve the tension of the events just a few minutes ago.

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Meanwhile, miles away, thirteen shadowy figures perched on thirteen dark, stony rises in the middle of a partially lit room. "Soon, my friends. Soon, we will have

everything," one said, and the others nodded. "Isn't that right, King?" The king of griffins was bound to the table, whimpering in fear. The thirteen shadowy figures

laughed and congratulated each other.

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HOLY CELESTIA, THIS TOOK FOREVER! Have an extra long chapter to compensate! I have turned into the one thing I really hate; a hiatus!

Review, and tell me to work harder.

Chapter 12 – They're on a Boat!

Josh reviewed the Equestrian map they had been given. "According to this, our next checkpoint is the old castle ruins, which should be very close. Do we have a boat?"

Shane shrugged, while Twilight shook her head. "Just as well, we'll find something. Or build a raft." As they walked, the trio came upon a bridge, old and decaying. "I

remember this bridge!" Twilight exclaimed. "This looks unstable," Josh commented. Shane shrugged, and walked halfway out onto the bridge. Josh and Twilight had

chosen that moment to be distracted by something in the forest, but quickly turned back at Shane's urgent cry of "Help me!" He was dangling by one foot from the

bridge; the boards around him had given in. Twilight rushed forward, and with some strain, lifted the entire bridge back onto their side, the ropes at the other end

snapping.

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"Well, that was certainly exciting," Josh said. "Now, how do we get across? The bridge broke." Twilight groaned. "My fault," she said. Josh rummaged in his backpack,

grunting with strain as he pulled out a long, rectangular object with a flat, rounded rectangle on the top. "Calibrate for distance… Twilight, can you tell how far away

the other end of the bridge is?" Twilight squinted at the other end. "About… what's your measurement again? Feet? Well, 20.2 of those." she answered, working out

the math in her head. Josh made some adjustments on the bottom. "Ready. Jump on top, and watch the landing," he said. Shane, knowing what this was, immediately

did so, but messed up the landing, with a cry of pain. "Heal you in a second!" Josh called over, as he jumped, landing perfectly with the use of his Long Fall Boots.

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Twilight hesitated, thinking. The plate had been calibrated to a human's weight, she supposed. She was about half that. So, wouldn't she just fly into the forest? She

couldn't teleport over, as she had used too much magic saving Shane from the falling bridge. She finally decided to put her trust in Josh's technology, and jumped. To

her surprise, she followed the same flight path as the others, and landed with a thump on the grass of the other side. "How-?" she questioned. "Calibrates for any

object's weight, no matter how heavy, so that it always follows the same trajectory," Shane answered. Josh stiffened. "Sorry," Shane said awkwardly. "S' alright, I

guess I'll have to get used to it," Josh replied, grinning.

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As they headed towards the ruins, Josh scanned the area for usable materials for a boat or raft. His eyes alighted on a fallen log that had crushed part of a wall, large

enough to carry the three of them. "Over here," he said. Shane looked up at the log. "How do we move it?" Twilight asked. Shane dug in his own backpack, and after a

second, pulled out a Zero-Point Energy Field Manipulator. "I still can't get used to owning one of these," Shane said, almost caressing the so-called 'Gravity Gun'. "Back

at Black Mesa, they said one of these was worth more than the entire facility, and we could only see the blueprints." Josh rolled his eyes. "Funnily enough, we said the

same thing about the Portal Device. It wasn't really true, as we can manufacture a lot of them if we need it. I think most of the cost went into safely manufacturing

them, because it's not easy to enclose a miniature black hole within a carbon-lead tube, and then put a bunch of electronics and heaters in. Making the ingredients was

relatively cheap, though." Shane nodded, and began lifting the log out of the hole in the wall.

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An hour later, they had built a relatively stable raft. Josh had made some fine-tuning adjustments to the boat, and soon they were climbing into the river. "I hate it

when my clothes get wet!" Shane complained. Josh felt much the same way, and groaned as he sloshed his Long Fall Boots into the boat. Twilight laughed as she

stepped in. "You two remind me of Rarity, being so fussy," she said. Shane smiled, while Josh merely focused on the boat. A minute later, they were off! "We might

have to make camp by nightfall, which should be in about three hours." He consulted the map. "Unless anyone wants to make a stop at Baltimare?" Twilight shook her

head. Shane considered saying yes, but realized they needed speed, not comfort on this voyage. No matter how much he wanted to visit more pony cities.

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They passed the time by playing cards, I Spy, whatever they could think of. Eventually, a few minutes after the moon had risen, they passed into a beautifully lit bay.

"Horseshoe Bay," Twilight commented happily. "My parents took me here when I was a foal." Josh looked around, appreciating the sights and smells. He hadn't been

outside for the fifteen years he had been at Aperture, and was still getting used to everything. They steered the boat with makeshift paddles ("Oh, we use these

now?" Shane sarcastically complained) and made camp at a small patch of beach which wasn't public. As they set up their sleeping bags, Josh sketched in a small

notebook. While he went to go find some water to distill for drinking, Twilight took a look at it. It was full of chemical equations, design schematics, and comments on

experiments he had seemingly done. One amused Twilight: "Note to self: Don't flood the lab with chlorine. Feels worse than neurotoxin." She felt a presence behind

her, and looked to see Josh, with a smirk on his face. "Yes, I know, it's a cluttered recollection of my thoughts," he said, misinterpreting the still somewhat amused look

on her face. "No, it's not that, it's this one comment," she said, pointing it out.

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Shane came over and read it. He looked at Josh. "Since when exactly have you smelled neurotoxin?" he said. Josh groaned. "Initiation Day," he replied. "The scientists

were forced to do everything a Test Subject would do, including running all the worst cognitive gauntlets and… well… inhaling neurotoxin at non-lethal concentration."

Shane laughed, and Twilight glared at him. "That's horrible, what did it smell like?" she asked sympathetically. Josh thought for a minute. "Like… as if someone had set

your nose on fire from the inside, and then spread that feeling to your innards. I imagine it gets worse at higher concentrations, some subjects just immediately die

without feeling too much beforehand if the amount of neurotoxin in the room gets high enough." Seeing Twilight's shocked look, Josh backtracked. "That was in the

1980's, it's been twenty years since we've had to use subjects for neurotoxin testing!" Shane shook his head. "Wow. And I thought our department was bad. At least

we were safe," he exclaimed. "Yeah, until you caused a freaking Resonance Cascade and killed eighty percent of the population," Josh retorted, causing the two of

them to begin bickering. "Enough!" Twilight finally shouted. The two stood there, looking sheepish. "Just go to bed, we can argue about who's science company is

better in the morning," she said, climbing into her sleeping bag and rolling over. Shane wanted to argue that technically they were more production facilities than

companies, but didn't feel it was worth it, and sank into his own sleeping bag.

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A/N: Filler. Joy… Sorry for the terrible chapter, but I do have to cover all that time spent between now and GriffinLand. Expect things to get more exciting when

the trio go sailing next chapter.

Chapter 13 – Plots, Secrecies and More

Gilda picked at a patch of floor that was chipped, wondering if she should follow the three to her homeland. It had been a long time since she was there, having run

away directly after flight school. Her father had searched the kingdom for her, and even searched Equestria, but to no avail. Eventually, or so she heard, he had fallen

into a depression. It pained Gilda to do this to the only parental figure she had, but she couldn't bear to be a griffin princess for one more second, let alone the rest of

her life. There were plenty of distant cousins who would be more than happy to take over the nation for her. Well, maybe not. She stretched out her wings, left a note

for Trixie, and sped off for Horseshoe Bay.

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Josh had traded their makeshift boat in exchange for a more suitable vessel, and now he was anxiously watching as they headed east, checking the map every now

and then. His portal device was by his side, orange light pulsating gently from the barrel and indicator. Twilight was cooking sweets (the one thing they could all agree

on to eat) and desperately trying to remember the recipes Pinkie had taught her. Shane was relaxing belowdeck, reading one of the books Twilight had lent him about

magic. In return, he had managed to find a modern (for Black Mesa) textbook about physics, and the two were taking turns discussing it. Josh had been steering for a

while when Shane called up "How's it going up there, cappie?" Josh jolted awake, and then snorted. "Cappie?" he called back. "Anyway, right on course." Twilight

seemed to be struggling to remember something. "There was something I was supposed to watch out for," she said, then gasped involuntarily as a drop of ice cold

water hit her.

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"What in science's name-" Josh started, but stopped as he looked up. A massive storm was right in front of them. "Teleporting storms?!" Josh said to Twilight. "Part of

the sea magic in this area. It usually scares away any unwanted intruders." Twilight nervously answered, looking around. "Well, this is my boat, and I will intrude,

storm or not!" Josh defiantly answered. He swept out the sails, and the boat immediately lurched forward. Twilight stumbled around as she tried to find a footing, and

nearly fell off the boat into the stormy depths had it not been for Shane. Using the hatch as a handhold, he pulled Twilight back onto the ship and belowdecks.

"Careful, Josh!" Shane bellowed over the storm. Josh was too busy concentrating on his position to notice or care, and he focused his entire mind on keeping the ship

in the right direction and upright.

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A few hours later, they had just cleared the storm. Josh was soaked and shivering, and Shane took over, even though he hated boats. Twilight treated the horrific cold

Josh had got in the meantime. "I am bad at steering boats," Shane thought out loud as he got sprayed by a stray wave. Finally, he checked his position to find that

they were nearly there. "Josh, you feeling alright down there?" he shouted. Josh came outside, face somewhat red from the blistering conditions he had endured.

"Good enough, I found a medkit in the boat. Seems this happens a lot," Josh said, pointing to his windblasted face. Shane smiled and continued steering, while Twilight

and Josh ate dinner (muffins). "Oh what, I don't get any?" Shane said, looking back for a second. "Tell you what, we'll stop off at a supply shop once we land, and you

can enjoy Fre- Griffin cuisine." Shane noticed the Freudian slip. "Alright, what have you noticed?" he said. "This griffin nation is exactly like France, but sans their

extremely bloody history." Twilight looked at him. "Five revolutions, more than a few dictators, you know. They make excellent croissants, though." Josh answered.

Twilight laughed.

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Finally, they caught sight of land. "All right!" Shane exclaimed when he saw how civilized it was. "Man, you must really hate boats," Josh remarked.

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Soon, they were eating in a small catery not unlike Sugarcube Corner. They thanked the owner and paid, who only looked at them as though curious, and continued on

their merry way. "So, where's the capital?" Shane asked Josh. "Right about there." He pointed to a spot on the map not far from where they were. "Couldn't we have

taken this way, here?" Shane said, pointing out a spot closer still on the shore of the nation. "No, that's uninhabited. Keep in mind this is still Renaissance times for

them, population expansion practically hasn't even happened yet." Josh answered. "I have no idea what you're talking about, but look at this," Twilight said. She

pointed to an extremely old missing poster glued to a window. "Missing: have you seen this Griffin?" Josh read, then looked at the picture.

It was Gilda.

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"What. The. Hell." Shane muttered so quietly that only Josh could hear it. "Looks like she's got a reason to be in Equestria," Josh said. "Look at the father." Shane

looked, and read the title. "The IX King of our fine nation," he said. Then he looked at Josh, evidently shocked. "I guess we did commit a capital crime, in their eyes,"

Josh said.

"We kidnapped a princess."

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Chrysalis was by now in the 17th chamber, but felt like she was in the 17th level of hell. She stared as the elevator opened to a simple, non-portalable corridor. Odd,

she thought to herself. Before this, most surfaces had been able to accept portals in any given chamber. This one was almost entirely black metal. She walked forward

grandly, still maintaining that air of grace and poise. "Deploying surprise in five… four… three… two… one." Sara blandly said. Chrysalis immediately hid behind a wall,

but didn't hear anything ominous except for… music? She peeked out, and was disappointed to find that it was only a cube. But this one was different. It had pink

hearts on it and a pink ring on the faces instead of the typical Aperture logo and a blue ring. She poked it, and immediately felt… Warm. Happy. Loved.

"Congratulations." Sara spoke up. "This was a prototype cube that is only used rarely, and actually emits love in the form of aerosolic hormones. After a few seconds of

research, I have determined that this is not only your primary source of food, love also keeps you alive. Please take care of it." Chrysalis felt another new sensation,

this time on her hooves. The holes that she had been told were going to eat her alive were disappearing, until they vanished entirely. Chrysalis was stunned. She had

only seen this happen once before, and never thought it would happen to her. She ran down the chamber, not noticing the bouncing energy balls that the cube

blocked, nor the portal device strapped to her hoof. She also felt stronger, more secure, less nervous. "Ahh… I had forgotten how delicious love is," the changeling

queen sighed. Wait. A brilliant thought had just occurred to her. If poking this thing restored her to her former powers, what would happen if she gave it some of her

own love? It couldn't hurt, she would just get it back a second later. She gave the cube a tentative hug, and immediately passed out as a flood of love assaulted her

senses.

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"Yeah," Sara said. "That looks about right." She consulted her own plans for the changeling. They were different than Josh's, but hopefully everything would work out

for the best.

Chapter 14 – No Going Back

Josh, Shane and Twilight walked through the streets of the town they were in. It was a typical port town, with plenty of ships, fishing shops, and street vendors.

"Reminds me a bit of some parts of Seattle," Shane mentioned. Josh rolled his eyes. "Never been to Seattle." Shane groaned. "Are you sure you're human?" Josh was

silent for a second. "…Not entirely," he finally answered.

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Gilda had hitched a ride on a trade ship to her homeland, hidden in a barrel. Half of her wanted to rip herself out of the barrel and roar at the ship's crew until they

followed her orders. The other half told that half to shut up until they reached the mainland. It was already hard enough to not rip out these stupid griffins' throats for

being so slow, but she kept reminding herself that she did not know how to handle a ship. She hunched down, hidden inside her barrel, and began to drift off to sleep.

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This town was quaint, Josh decided. Then again, most of his coworkers would laugh at him if he ever used the word 'quaint' in a sentence. Then again, he was in a land

of magical talking ponies. As he walked with Shane and Twilight through the streets of this strange land, they came upon a large wall, with guards stationed at the

only visible entrance. "Halt!" a guard said. "What is your business here?" Twilight held up the letter for them to inspect. "We are here on royal business with your

king," she said. Moments later, after the two griffins had determined the authenticity of the document, they escorted the trio through the wall and towards a massive

castle, far larger than that of Equestria.

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"Louis XVI, all over again," Shane whispered to Josh, who laughed. "Quiet back there! No laughing in the palace, king's orders," the guard in front of them ordered.

After a long walk through several decadent hallways and courtrooms, they finally came to a huge set of doors. The guard in front knocked, and a voice from the other

side replied "Yes, come in…" It sounded sad. The doors opened, and the two guards hastened back to their posts.

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When the doors were opened, all Josh could do was stare. The king had plastered news reports about Gilda all over his walls, as well as pictures of her and him

(judging from the age of Gilda in the pictures, this had been several years ago). "You must be Aperture Science." The king said. It wasn't a question. "Yes, and we've

come to negotiate the end of the war." The king almost cracked a smile, but apparently thought better of it. "Good. My people have been suffering long enough. Will

you give us what we want?" Josh nodded, feeling uncomfortable. "You will get precisely as much access to our technologies as Equestria currently does. The king's

frown deepened even further, if that was possible. "That won't do. We'll have to see if you can come up with something of a better offer. Guards, take them away."

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Security guards burst through the doors, surrounding the three. In a last-ditch bid for escape, Twilight desperately enveloped Shane in magic, and threw him out the

window, meaning to follow him herself. However, she was sprayed with some sort of gas canister by one of the guards and quickly fell unconscious. Josh was busy

himself, fighting three of the guards. It was too much, however, and one of them got him with the spray of gas. Josh's last thought was 'dammit, Shane,' and quickly fell

to the floor.

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Twilight woke up to find herself in a prison cell. The walls were off-white, and from what she could see from outside her cell, the place was huge. Clearly this was a

more 'modern' prison, as instead of bars across the doorway it had a single, heavy steel door. Josh was still very asleep from whatever had happened. What had

happened, anyway? She was distracted by the door opening. She lunged at the intruder, ready to rip out its very spine, but was restrained by a metal chain attached

to the wall. When had she been chained to the wall? Twilight groaned as the events of the previous day caught up to her. "Very nice," the newcomer said. This griffin

was dressed in the most outlandish fashion Twilight had ever seen, wearing an actual dress. And it was a he. "Do you like it?" he asked, noticing her look. "It's the

latest fashion around these parts. Of course, you wouldn't know that. "What do you want?" Twilight said, trying to keep herself from breaking into tears.

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"What do I want?" the voice repeated. "I want control. We all want control." To Twilight's horror, twelve more figures walked in, taking up almost the full space of the

room. "Who are you?" she asked. "We are the Council. We're the ones who are really in control here, not that wretched king."

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The griffins seemed to be focused on Josh, still sound asleep. "Wake him up," one said. It was not a question. Twilight gently shook Josh awake, and he looked up to

see the thirteen griffins in a circle around him. "Now. You're going to give us all your technology, or die." The apparent leader spoke, with a heavy accent. "No." Josh

said, equally firm in his stance. One of the council grinned, and kicked him in the face, sending him stumbling back and leaving a red mark. "You'll break. It's just a

matter of when." The leader whispered, as the thirteen filed out, leaving Josh and Twilight alone in the cell.

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Shane came to as the sun was burning over his head. Evidently, it had been some time since he had landed here. Speaking of which… where was he? He was in a

small cellar, dark except for a beam of sunlight, encasing his body in a perfect circle of light. Shane got up, and looked around. "Lookin' for somethin', are you?" an old,

wheezing voice spoke up behind him. Shane jumped about a foot and turned to face the intruder.

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What he saw was the king of griffins – only somehow… older. Bruised. Scarred. The griffin saw his recognition, and laughed, a slow, painful sound. "Don't worry

yourself, cub. I'm Matt's brother." The griffin held out an object to him, and Shane recognized the Gravity Gun. "Looks like this is yours." The griffin stated. Shane took

the Gravity Gun, inspected it for flaws, and finally asked, "Who are you, exactly?" The griffin cocked its head, looking at him. "Like I said, I'm King Matthias' brother. My

name's Grunel, and I'm also the janitor for the palace." Shane was confused. "You're the janitor? Shouldn't you be royalty?" Grunel laughed. "I never liked that sort of

thing, I just wanted to keep the place clean. So when Matt started going crazy over the loss of his daughter, I helped him out behind the scenes. Now that I've

introduced myself, who are you?" Shane introduced himself and explained the recent events with the Council, the king and his friends. Grunel frowned. "Sounds like

blackmail to me… Best thing would be to just get out of the country and back to Equestria while you can."

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"You're going to have to head through these old passageways through the catacombs to be completely unseen. They'll take you to a bar outside the castle if you go

straight… and just about anywhere in the palace, if you can find the right door." The griffin opened a door behind him, which had been hidden by wine bottles and

barrels. "Happy trails… and good luck with your friends." Grunel smiled as he closed the door.

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A/N: We now return you to our regularly scheduled hiatus. I can't apologize enough for the distance between these chapters, as college and a few other things

have been keeping me busy to no end. Review so I have motivation to get off my arse and work on the next chapter.