3:2: Stallion VS. Griffon

"I need to speak to that apple bucking sibling of yours. Stop hiding her."

"Eenope."

"Darn it, stop that. I need to speak to her. This is a matter of importance. I need to talk to her about Rainbow Dash."

"She's out. Come back later."

"No, tell me where she is."

"Eenope."

"Darn it you lame p... fine. I'll come back in 10 minutes."

Rainbow Dash groggily rubbed her head. It was later that evening after Rainbow's short nap and the first thing Rainbow noticed was the loud argument going on. Gilda and Big Macintosh, by the sounds of it. Rainbow Dash rubbed her temples before rolling over, shoving the blankets off the bed. She sighed, before pushing herself off the bed onto her hooves. She ignored the vertigo, opting to stumble to the door. Outside, the rain pelted the windows obscuring all traces of moon rays; that added with the raindrop refractions makes for a very dark night.

Hmm, what's going on? The gist, I think, is Gilda wants to talk to Applejack... about me but Applejack isn't here and Big Macintosh won't tell her where so... ehn, I'll go downstairs and find out. Rainbow thought before opening the door. The light in the hallway was off but downstairs, it was bright as could be. Rainbow trotted down the stairs, hearing the door close and Big Mac's hoof steps towards the kitchen.

"Heh... Big Macintosh is more of a mare than Applejack," Rainbow said to herself, touching down on the bottom step.

"What's that now, sugarcube?" the aforementioned mare asked, popping out from around the corner.

Rainbow almost gasped, instead slipping on a small rug at the base of the stairs, crashing onto the ground. Rainbow chuckled sheepishly, looking up at the smirking farm pony. Applejack extended a hoof, helping Rainbow to her hooves.

"Uh, I mean, it just seems that Big Macintosh is spending a little too much time in the kitchen lately... kinda odd for a Stallion like him," Rainbow said as the two trotted into the living room.

Applejack looked to the ceiling as the two mares sat down on the couch, staring outside at the dark rainstorm. She chuckled when she came to the same conclusion.

"Heh heh, Ah reckon yer right 'bout that one... but he's not cookin' or anythin' half th' time," Applejack said.

She leaned back, crossing her hind legs while Rainbow lazily hogged the other half of the couch. She sprawled her entire body across the couch, setting her back hooves on Applejack's lap. The country mare looks down in annoyance before rolling her eyes with a sigh.

"So, what's the big guy doing, anyways?" Rainbow asks, stretching out again, still groggy from the sleep.

"He's takin' care of th' crop at home. He's writin' th' records, 'n stuff. He's th' brains of Sweet Apple Acres," Applejack said proudly.

Rainbow cocked an eyebrow. "Big Mac is the brains? I'm shocked, legit," Rainbow said, arching her back to stretch before a nice crack signalled the end.

"Heh, well, y'all wouldn' think much when ya first look at th' guy. If it weren't fer him, we'd pro'lly be on th' streets," Applejack chuckled.

Rainbow shot up into a sitting position and peered over at Applejack. "On the street? I wouldn't let that happen, Applejack," Rainbow said, almost defensively.

Applejack held a shocked face before chuckling.

"Woah there, Rainbow. Kinda sudden but two things: one, why, and two, y'all live in cloud house," she said, leaning back while adjusting her stetson.

Rainbow motioned to talk before face hoofing. "Applejack, there is no way in Chaos I would let the Apple Family, or a friend, stay on the streets... and if that's the case, I would get a house on the ground, just to allow you to not live on the streets," she said, resisting the urge to stretch once more.

Applejack rolled her eyes playfully, chuckling as the cyan mare could not find a comfy sitting position.

"Well, thank ya kindly, sugarcube. Nice t' know a friend o' ours would be willin' t' go so far fer us. Thank ya," Applejack said, nudging Rainbow's leg.

Rainbow sighed before stopping her fidgeting. She stretched her legs out once more before setting herself down.

"You don't have to thank me, Applejack," she replied, having found a comfy position.

"That was an early thanks."

A banging on the door broke the short-lived silence and Big Mac immediately rushed out of the kitchen, Applejack and Rainbow watching. Applejack was shuddering slightly and Rainbow adjusted her once comfy seating position.

"Gilda?" Rainbow asked, half knowing the answer.

Applejack looked at Rainbow in confusion before unsteadily looking towards the front door.

"Uh, yea... how'd you guess?" she asked as she too adjusted her sitting position almost as if she tried to hide herself in the couch.

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Well, I heard her and Big Macintosh earlier arguing and that got me up. Kinda noisy, that Gilda," Rainbow chuckled to herself.

Applejack sighed. "Sorry 'bout that, didn't mean t' wake ya but she want's t' talk. T' me. 'bout you. Not talkin' until Ah talked t' ya 'fore Ah go around sayin' things y'all don't want me t' say," Applejack said, tilting her hat down.

Rainbow chuckled before nudging Applejack's shoulder. "C'mon, you don't have to ask me. Just as long as you don't say anything I don't like," she chortled while getting comfy once more.

The door opened finally and a quick bang was heard, the door itself opening to it's fullest. A few stomps and then Gilda walked into the living room, Big Macintosh sighing as he followed. The griffon was soaking wet from the rainstorm outside. Gilda stared directly at Applejack who bore a nervous expression and Rainbow Dash, who seemed to be sleeping. Gilda didn't take in the scenery long.

"You, Earth Pony, I need to talk to you. Quickly," Gilda said.

Rainbow, only having her eyes closed, almost reacted. Gilda's voice didn't sound rude... it just sounds frantic. Huh... she thought. Applejack cleared her throat.

"What for?" she asked.

Gilda shook her head. "I just need to talk to you. Badly. Look, sorry for barging in or something but this is important," she said, looking back as Big Macintosh was dangerously close to Gilda, wearing a stern expression.

Applejack cocked an eyebrow, arching them also. Suspicious, but Ah reckon Ah've seen more suspicious an' an old friend o' Rainbow whom happened to have come back t' patch things up isn't that bad, Ah 'spose... Applejack thought before gently moving Rainbow's legs, who only moved as if she were sleeping. Why's she actin' like she's asleep? Eh, it can wait.

"Ah don't think we properly introduced ourselves. Th' names Applejack," the farmer said with a smile, extending her hoof.

Gilda looked down in what one could perceive as shock before looking back and forth between Applejack's face and her hoof before reluctantly reaching out a talon and grabbing the hoof. Applejack shook with the griffon before Gilda retracted her talon.

"Uh, Gilda..." she said before stopping.

"Well, Ah saw you at Pinkie's party, so Ah know what ya used t' be like," Applejack said, walking out of the living room.

Gilda stepped back, a hurt expression on her face. She scowled, before stopping. Wait, she said... she thought before taking a cautious step passed Big Macintosh.

"Used... to be? Whaddaya mean?" Gilda asked, slowly following Applejack.

Big Macintosh walked back into the kitchen, Gilda looking around. This was her first time in the Apple Family home and may be the last, but... I have to admit, this is a cozy home. Little too cozy. Doesn't compare to Rainbow's cloud castle though, heh. she thought before they arrived at the front door.

"What Ah mean is that ya were a mite rude back then, but Rainbow said y'all had patched thing's up. If she's cool with ya, Ah am too," Applejack said, opening the front door.

Gilda looked outside quickly. "Why're we goin' outside? Can't talk inside the house?" Gilda scoffed, rubbing her damp feathers.

Once outside, Applejack closed the door and let a quick shiver pass. It was chilly, but at least the porch blocked the rain. Applejack just sat down right there outside the door and Gilda stayed standing.

"Alright, now don't beat around the bush. I have a few questions," Gilda said, not in a rude or demanding tone... Applejack couldn't pin it.

Applejack sighed. "Well, ask away. Ah can't lie, kinda my thing," she said, resisting the urge to add a chuckle.

Gilda paused, kneeling down.

"What do you think of Rainbow Dash?" she spat out rather quickly.

Applejack didn't reply immediately. What do Ah think? I dunno what she means... does... does she mean what do Ah think of her as a friend? Or as a pony... She looked over at Gilda.

"Ah'm not sure what ya mean. Ya mean... as a friend? As a pony?" Applejack asked, her mind shifting through the various answers.

Gilda scoffed, scratching at the wooden floor. "You know what I mean, lame-o. How much do you like her?"

Applejack would have spit if she was drinking something. Her eyes were wide, staring at Gilda; the griffon still scratched away at the ground. Applejack looked down at her hooves, trying to find an answer.

"She's a great friend. The great-" she started before Gilda interjected.

"Cut the crap, 'jack. Stop spewing whatever," she demanded now.

Applejack thought for a second before giggling. She smiled, leaning against the wall of the house. Gilda looked back over at Applejack, the mare staring off into the distance.

"She's the greatest friend a pony could ask for. She's loyal, she wouldn't give up on ya fer nothin', and she'd sacrifice her own time, adjust her schedule jus' t' help out a fellow friend. She's my athletic rival... my best friend," Applejack said, all with pride.

Gilda stared at her for a second before shifting her gaze to in front of the mare, smirking and chuckling before letting out a long sigh.

"That's all, huh...? Well, that's fine. Next question..." Gilda stopped fidgeting with the wood, leaning against the wall instead.

"Ask away, Miss Gilda," Applejack replied in a happier tone than before.

Gilda snorted. "Drop the miss bit. Just call me Gilda..." she cleared her throat. "Okay, second..." she paused, scratching her head. "What's the red doofus like on a daily basis? Lame-o looks way too buff to be a pencil pusher and doesn't act like me nearly enough to be a bully," she asked, sighing when she finished.

Applejack chuckled. "The 'doofus' is a quiet ol' fellow. Keeps t' himself, doesn't speak often, strongest pony Ah know. A while back, he dragged a whole house behind him, bouncin' as he did so, even with my lil' sis on his back. Th' kind o' pony ya don't wanna mess with, but he's still a big ol' lug," Applejack said, chuckling at the memory.

Gilda stared forward, a large smile on her face. Her face expressed the devious thoughts in her mind.

"So," she looked over at Applejack. "About your brother..."

Inside, Rainbow tossed and turned atop of the couch. Big Mac was busy doing his own thing in the kitchen, from the smell of it, making dinner. Applejack and Gilda were talking outside, there really wasn't much to do. After a few minutes, the door opened up and Applejack stepped in, followed by Gilda. Gilda had shook herself before entering, this time just appearing as a fuzzy ball of feathers. Rainbow resisted the urge to chuckle before remembering she was supposed to be sleeping. Gilda had caught her already, and Rainbow slapped herself quickly.

"So, Dash... your turtle can teleport apparently..." Gilda said, slowly tossing herself down onto the couch, directly onto Rainbow Dash's lap.

"Tortoise," Applejack corrected.

"Whatever," Gilda replied.

Rainbow replied with an "oof". Applejack joined in, setting herself down on Rainbow's legs. Rainbow resisted the urge to freak out mainly because doing so would hurt her more.

"Ugh, whaddaya mean? And ya mind getting off?" Rainbow said, squirming and wriggling around.

Gilda ignored her, folding her arms and crossing her legs and grit her teeth, staring out the window. "The guy doesn't stay in one place for more than five seconds. I turn away, five seconds later and the little thing is just gone. It's hectic," she said with a stern annoyance. Rainbow only grunted, now trying to push Gilda off with her forehooves. She grit her teeth and let out a few growls. Gilda noticed this and rolled her eyes. "Fine, fine..."

Gilda shoved herself to her talons and did a quick stretch. Applejack fixed it so Rainbow's legs were now on her lap, like before. Rainbow let out a large sigh of relief.

"Well, Tank is a tortoise, he shouldn't be that fast," Rainbow paused, "but if he learned how to time-warp, I'm probably going to explode because that would be seriously awesome," she said, smirking at the thought.

Gilda and Applejack both rolled their eyes. Rainbow stopped her chuckling. Wait, what the... she sat up and looked at Applejack.

"Gilda, this conversation is accomplishing nothing," Rainbow stated.

Applejack chuckled while Gilda face taloned. Rainbow adjusted her hind legs so she was in a proper sitting position.

"Yer right. Gilda, why don't ya go talk t' Big Macintosh, 'fore dinner. An' if ya want, yer welcome t' stay fer dinner," Applejack said.

Gilda looked at Applejack as she finished the sentence. She had a look of confusion while Rainbow smiled. That was nice. she thought.

"I can't, I don't even know you that well, and I don't live here. 'sides, Dash's place is fine," she said, a hint of smugness in her voice.

Applejack scoffed. "Nonsense, any friend o' Rainbow is a friend o' mine, 'member? Y'all are welcome as long as ya respect th' surroundin's," Applejack said,

Gilda looked away from both ponies, an odd look of joy and surprise on her face. She turned to the kitchen, then back to Rainbow and Applejack; both ponies were plastered in almost the exact same sitting position. She sighed, before resisting the urge to stomp into the kitchen.

Gilda hasn't acted out or very angry lately. She was distressing yesterday... oh well, at least she'll come through. I hope. Rainbow thought as Gilda walked into the kitchen.

"So, what all did you talk to Gilda about?" Rainbow asked as Gilda's talon steps were inaudible behind the various sounds in the kitchen.

"Eh heh heh, y'all will find out in about a secon', Ah reckon," Applejack said, turning her head to the kitchen.

Rainbow curiously tilted her head and kept her ears up. Inside the kitchen, Big Macintosh was busy at work creating a stew and to the side, a book with Sweet Apple Acre's earnings for the week. Gilda leaned against part of the counter. Big Macintosh turned to look at Gilda for a few seconds, stopping as he went to put some apples into the stew. A few seconds passed before he continued on with his work.

"Hey, Big Macintatch," she started.

"Macintosh," Big Mac interjected.

"Whatever," Gilda said, dragging a talon across her face. "Anyways, I wanna ask you something," she started, waiting for an acknowledgement. This pony was said to be rather awkward in conversations and she didn't feel like wasting breaths.

"Sorry, Ah'm taken," he replied, hiding his smile via picking up some potatoes and dropping them into the stew.

Gilda's face reddened for a few seconds before she growled. "No, I mean, are you doing anything tomorrow morning?" she asked, more demanding this time.

Big Macintosh looked over at Gilda with a dull stare. "Uh-"

Gilda sighed. "I know, I know, 'Ah'm taken' or whatever. Not what I mean, just answer before I forget why I'm supposed to tolerate lame-o ponies," Gilda said, forgetting all manners.

Big Macintosh payed no mind to the rude tone Gilda took and quickly plopped the last of the ingredients, broccoli, into the stew. After, he checked the flame underneath the pot, set the lid atop of the stew, and looked over to Gilda.

"Eenope," he replied.

Gilda smirked. Applesmack was right. He doesn't say many words. Gilda craned her neck and rotated her wings which had grown stiff; she hasn't flown in a while and the rain agitated her wings.

"So..."

THE NEXT DAY, Applebloom, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Twilight all sat in conveniently set-up bleachers with an awning on it shielding them from the light but long showers going on above. The field in front of them lay set up with various things; fences, mud pits, ropes, various things used for competition and a few things that are being set up for the upcoming Iron Pony Contest. In the centre, about to start a competition of their own, is Big Macintosh and Gilda. Spike stood off to the side, holding a megaphone and wearing a raincoat with an umbrella hat. Sighing, Spike started to speak.

"Fillies and Gentlecolts, welcome to the not-Iron-Pony-Competition Competition, Stallion VS. Griffon!" Spike shouted into the megaphone to the small audience who clopped after he finished.

"In the right corner, we have the big red brain of Sweet Apple Acres, Big Macintosh!" Spike paused to let the audience applaud once more.

Big Macintosh didn't make any poses or move much. He just stared at the ground, eyeing the rope that lay there. Gilda looked towards Big Macintosh with a look expressing disgust and fury; an odd combination given Gilda hasn't known Big Macintosh long enough to develop a grudge.

She did re~eally hate Pinkie at first, though... Pinkie's not telling me all of the details of what happened mainly because Gilda made her Pinkie Pie swear when prompted by Pinkie. Curious... suspicious... rah. Rainbow thought as she fidgeted on the bench.

She looked to the left to see Applejack with a broken composure, fidgeting around with her mane as she eagerly but nervously awaited the upcoming events. Twilight held a notepad in the air and stared at the two figures in the field in one of her infamous analysis sessions. Rarity had a raincoat and umbrella hat on, the camera held in the air as she stood pretty much right next to Spike. Pinkie Pie was giggling uncontrollably, almost as if she set up some super secret surprise.

"Hee hee, after we're gonna party on the train because we can't have a party here because we have to go on the train later so we're going to party on the train and I wonder if they'll let me take my Party Cannon with me?" Pinkie rambled on, looking to the sky (or the awning) with a hoof on her chin at the end.

The ponies rolled their eyes at Pinkie's antics and went back to anticipating the event.

"In the left corner, we have the..." Spike looked down at a piece of paper. "'The Coolest Griffon Ever', Gilda," Spike said, doing his best to keep his announcer voice.

Gilda simply smirked and nodded and was mildly surprised when she actually did get applause, loudest from Pinkie Pie. Rainbow looked off to the side. Jeez, Pinkie. I know you have a tendency to freak out, but... she sighed, leaning on the railing of the bleacher. Spike was unsure of what to say, merely looking around nervously before clearing his throat.

"Uh, let the games begin! First up, we have a simple tug-of-war, brawn VS. brash!" Spike said, examining the ground.

No mud pit this time, simply because the ground is already muddy enough. There was only a small flag tied around a part of the rope. Gilda spat into her talons before picking up an end of the rope. Big Macintosh bent his knees and picked up the tip of the other end in his mouth, not really showing he was ready. Spike looked at the two.

"Ready..." he saw Gilda get tense and extend her wings, primal instincts taking action. "Set..." he saw Gilda bend her knees and prepare to tug. Big Macintosh hasn't changed position. "GO!" Spike shouted out.

Gilda stepped back, pulling on the rope. Immediately, she had resistance. Good resistance. Big Macintosh didn't budge, nor did he seem to be moving. As a matter of fact, he hasn't moved since he picked up the rope. Gilda grunted and began tugging on it erratically, just trying hopefully to gain some ground. Rainbow looked on, her face going solemn.

Oh no, Gilda is going to lose... Rainbow thought, biting her bottom lip. Normally, I wouldn't care but she freaked out last time over a bunch of silly pranks. she adjusted her sitting position. Applejack and Applebloom both smirked, remarking at Big Macintosh's natural strength.

"Heh, tha's Big Macintosh fer ya. Ah'd be surprised if Gilda even makes 'em think about movin'," Applejack said, leaning against the wood, tilting her hat over her head. "Wake me when it's done."

Rainbow looked over and gave Applejack a light smack on the leg. Applejack chuckled.

"Don't be like that, Gilda could win. Maybe she's just playing..." Rainbow said, slowly turning to watch Gilda continue her "non-struggle".

Big Macintosh sighed, twisting his body slightly and turning his head slowly. Gilda slid, regardless of her talons gripping the ground, passed the line. The small crowd in the bleachers clopped with the exclusion of Rainbow and Applejack, the former still wearing her solemn look, the latter chuckling.

"Tol' ya so," she said as she sat back up, adjusting her hat once more.

"Eeyup!" Applebloom said in her best Big Mac impersonation.

Applejack and Applebloom both chuckled while Rainbow let out a surprised breath, unable to reply for the moment. She grumbled before crossing her forehooves and wrinkling up her snout.

"Didn't laugh at you when you lost the tug-of-war..." Rainbow mumbled.

"Whaddaya mean, Dashie? You laughed and bragged for hours!" Pinkie exclaimed, obliviously ecstatic.

The others chuckled and Rainbow's face reddened slightly from embarrassment. She shot to her hooves and trotted off the bleachers to the ground. She stood just in the light rain and stared forward to the scene. Gilda has pushed herself up, growling in frustration.

"C'mon, Gilda. He's just a pony and you lost. Are you gonna take that?" Rainbow asked, obviously trying to infuriate the griffon...

... and it worked. Gilda took a surprised look for a second before scowling with rage. She opened her mouth to speak, before snapping her beak shut. She turned suddenly over to Big Macintosh. The others sitting on the bench expressed shock, confusion, and an odd sense of betrayal as the pegasus sided with the griffon. Only Applejack picked up on the tactic.

"That was one time, 'reddy'. Prepare to get your miserable flank beaten in the next events," Gilda said, trying to suppress her rage.

Rainbow sighed in relief. My plan worked. Get Gilda frustrated at me rather than Gilda, make her hyped, save face. Good job. she thought to herself as she walked to the bleachers again.

She sat back in her previous position, Applejack nudging her shoulder when she sat. Rainbow looked over to the farmer, noticing the others stopped thinking about what Rainbow had said.

"Ah see what ya did there. Heh, way t' diffuse a situation," Applejack whispered to Rainbow.

"Shut up. Tell nopony otherwise the hat gets it," Rainbow grumbled out before sighing. Applejack chuckled and Rainbow stared at the ground for a second, in thought. "Y'know, we haven't done anything related to the Apple Spectrum for a while. Kinda seems odd, but at least we're doing something later today," Rainbow said with another sigh.

Applejack let out a hum, the other ponies pretending not to listen to the conversation that got louder. Before long, Applejack let out a "huh", before nodding.

"Yer right... and later today is pro'lly gonna take f'ever, what with this 'competition', 'n stuff," Applejack said.

All the ponies in the stand both nodded at the same time, ignorant of each other.

Back in the field, Gilda and Big Macintosh set up at the next event. Rarity had taken to tallying the score on a clipboard she levitated next to the camera. Event #2: Running Long Jump. Big Macintosh showed no emotion still, but inside, this was a fault of his.

"Simple, the objective of this game is to run and jump the farthest. Ready..." Spike said in a rush, ogling Rarity as she snapped photos.

Gilda cracked her neck side to side and rotated her wings once more. Big Macintosh just stared, remaining his his usual stoic stance.

"Jump when you're ready, Big Macintosh," Spike said.

The bleacher ponies clopped their hooves, cheering on the stallion. Big Macintosh sighed and bent his knees before taking off in a gallop. He reached the line and hopped directly into the air. The ponies excited cheers burst when he jumped, only to quickly die off.

Big Macintosh jumped a total of three feet before he fell down, tripping on the ground and landing on his face. Disappointed sighs rung out from the onlookers, Rarity accidentally snapping a photo of Big Macintosh. Gilda smirked and started to laugh hard, before spotting Rainbow Dash in the corner of her eye with a stern expression, shaking her head no. Gilda covered her beak with a talon, sighing in frustration. Right... laughing at others is a good way to not work this 'friendship' thing... ugh, that's all I used to do to lame-o ponies.

Rainbow looked over to Applejack. "So, uh, how or... why is this happening? I don't object the notion of seeing two brutes going at it in brutal competition... as a matter of fact, I endorse it. I actually want to see a Twilight VS. Celestia magic duel in the future," Rainbow said.

Twilight spun around instantly and shot Rainbow Dash a furious scowl of rage, left eye twitching.

"NEVER. EVER. GOING. TO HAPPEN," Twilight said before taking a deep breath. Her friends all looked at the angered mare in shock, especially Rainbow Dash. "... but I thank you for your... 'compliment' on my skills, so to speak..." Twilight trailed off, looking back to the scene about to unfold.

Rainbow gulped before chuckling sheepishly. "Uh, so yeah... why is this happening, Applejack?" Rainbow asked.

Applejack shook off the recent event and looked back at Rainbow.

"Gilda o'er there decided that if Ah'm able t' be yer rival, she, being 'better than ya', wonders what m' brother would be like as a rival. Ah think somethin' else is brewin' in that head of hers, heh..." Applejack chuckled before looking over at the griffon, about to take off as Big Macintosh stumbled out of the way.

Rainbow looked at Applejack in confusion. "'Something else'? Whaddaya mean?" Rainbow asked from Applejack's right side.

Applebloom looked over at her sister also. "Yea, whaddaya mean 'somethin' else'?" she asked from Applejack's left side.

Applejack's smiley face died out, replaced by an annoyed face. Both sides bein' riveted by th' same question... "Never mind, jus' pay attention t' yer friend, RD," Applejack said with a sigh.

Applebloom and Rainbow Dash both shrugged, facing forward also. Gilda stared at Spike who waited for the go ahead from Rarity to start. Rarity looked at Spike and nodded with a smile. Spike's heart almost exploded before he reminded himself, he has a job. He looked at Gilda.

"Jump when your ready, Gilded," Spike said.

"Gilda..." the mentioned griffon growled out.

"Oh, uh, right..." Spike turned away.

Gilda let out a shaky sigh before looking up at the situation ahead. She didn't bend her knees in preparation but instead took off in a sprint on all fours. She came up to the line and took a mighty leap, soaring far passed Big Macintosh's line and landed almost on the end of the little sand pit; further than both Rainbow Dash and Applejack at the last Iron Pony Competition. The bleacher ponies let out "oohs" at the surprisingly good jump. They clopped against the bleachers, Gilda resisting the urge to showboat. Rainbow said that's also not a good thing to do during this... 'Friendshiip' stuff... the things I do to earn back the trust... holy Celestia, is Rainbow going to have severe payback coming her way when this is all over... Gilda thought.

Rainbow peered on and a thought struck her. She smirked deviously, chuckling quietly to herself as she rubbed her hooves together. If only I had a handlebar moustache... haa! She thought to herself. Applejack looked over, brow raised in confusion. Rainbow leaned over, suggestively close to the mare. Applejack's eyes widened slowly with confusion.

"I'll give you the bits I don't need-need from my paycheck and I'll work double and overtime for half a year if I can have 30 cartloads of apples," Rainbow said.

Applejack's eyes shot open, pupils smaller than an apple seed. She turned slowly to face Rainbow as if she were insane, only to see Rainbow sporting one of the most devious expressions ever, matched possibly only by Discord himself. Her spare change, an' half a year's overtime for 30 carts of apples? She sure makes a lot, but th' thought of her wastin' it on apples? she thought.

"May Ah ask why, sugarcube? 'cause quite frankly, you lost me at 'I'll give you the bits'..." Applejack attempted to wrap her mind about what was just said.

"Do it. Go grab Big Macintosh and yank them apples over here, I'll be over to help. Important change to the rules to make things exciting. I'll also be stopping in my cloud home to grab something," Rainbow said, zipping over to the four surrounding the dirt pit.

Applejack nodded slowly, noticing now that her friends on the bleachers all stared back at her with the same confusion she wore. They all turned to look back at the sand pit. Rainbow touched down, gathering the attention of all present.

"Everypony, griffon and dragon, we're scrapping the other games in favour of one tie breaker simply because I said so. Big Macintosh, go see your sister for why," Rainbow demanded.

"Wait, who died and made you princess?" Gilda scoffed.

"I did, now sit tight, G. I'll be back soon," Rainbow said, zipping off into the skies once more towards her cloud home.

Rarity and Spike looked up as Rainbow Dash sped off at her top casual speed.

"Uh, what just happened?" Spike and Rarity asked in unison.

Half an hour later, Rainbow, Big Macintosh, and Applejack brought in the last three carts of apples, totalling at 30. Rainbow had ordered that 15 be placed at each end of the large field Rainbow practised in earlier. Rainbow unclipped herself from the cart of apples she just flew in and examined the field. The rain gave it a nice slippery feel (to Rainbow), and the bleachers have appropriately been moved to the side of the field. Rainbow dropped the harness onto the ground and flew over next to the bleachers where Applejack, Big Macintosh, Gilda, and the others all stood in wait. Gilda was growling from boredom. Rainbow saw the two competitors and smirked. She trotted over to a box she had brought in and opened it, pulling out two uniforms. She tossed one at Big Macintosh, one at Gilda.

"Uh, what are these?" Gilda asked, holding the uniform by the end.

Big Macintosh looked at it, carefully examining every inch. The others had the same question in their mind, just not asking out loud. Rainbow Dash took her proud Rainbow Dash stance.

"Uniforms for Apple Battle Royale. Unfortunately, I only have pony ones so Gilda, you'll have to do something about that," Rainbow said, chuckling.

"Woah, what!" Big Macintosh, Applejack, and Applebloom all asked at once.

"Apple Battle Royale? What're ya talkin' about, Rainbow? Ah don't ever recall givin' ya permission t' use m' apples fer anythin' involvin' 'battle', did Ah?" Applejack said in a stern voice.

Rainbow smirked. "I did just buy 30 cart loads (early), and volunteer half a year of overtime work. Let's just ignore that fact and get to the premise..." she said.

Gilda was smirking deviously. Battle Royale, eh? Leave it to Rainbow Dash to create the stupidest yet most awesome concept for a competition. Gilda thought to herself, opting to tie the blue uniform around her waist while Big Macintosh squeezed himself into the red uniform.

Applejack facehoofed and let out a long sigh. Twilight and Pinkie both shot Rainbow looks of uncertainty. Fluttershy, Rarity, and Applebloom all looked worried.

"Rarity, you take as many photos as possible from as many angles. This is perfect for photo opportunities to advertise Sweet Apple Acres!" Rainbow exclaimed, looking back to the two combatants.

"Uh-" Rarity started.

"GENIUS! The way of showing Sweet Apple Acres apples are amazing is beating the crud out of each other with the apples to show they are nice enough to beat the crud out of each other!" Pinkie exclaimed happily with a closed eyes, wide smile.

The others looked at Pinkie with confusion and Pinkie's eyes opened, her smile disappearing.

"On second thought, that actually makes zero sense in Pinkie Logic," Pinkie said, shrugging it off.

There's a first... Twilight, Applejack, and Rarity all thought.

"Quit yapping, explain what we're doing, Rainbow Dash," Gilda spat out in bitter annoyance.

Rainbow sighed. Too many questions. She faced the two. "Simply put, toss your apples at the other until the other is blue skied," Rainbow said with a stomp.

"Uh, what is 'blue skied', Rainbow?" Fluttershy asked.

Rainbow went to speak, so did Gilda but both were cut off.

"Blue skied is when during a round/play/set in a sport or game, you're knocked onto your back and you're forced to stare at the deep, blue sky from the sudden shock of impact knocking you on your back and your position, hence blue sky," Big Macintosh answered.

A quick silence overtook the whole group before Rainbow cleared her throat. "So yeah, extreme sport for two brutes of utter bruteness and brute strength, go to your sides," Rainbow said.

Gilda nodded in excitement and darted off to the furthest side. Big Macintosh slowly trotted over to the closer side. Applejack spat out quickly.

"Woah, wait a minute big brother, why're ya jus' acceptin' this battle thingy so willingly? Don't y'all realize somepony could get hurt?" Applejack said, frantically.

"Eeyup," everypony and dragon said, mimicking Big Macintosh before bursting into laughter.

"So wh-" Applejack started to say before being cut off.

Rainbow stopped laughing. "Waitaminute, hurry up. Spike, gimmie that megaphonographic thingy," the cyan pegasus said, snatching the megaphone out of Spike's claws before he could object, much to his surprise.

"READYSETGO!" Rainbow shouted into the megaphone.

"Slow down, dear. You'll be rushing into your own grave yet, Rainbow Dash," Rarity said as she trotted over to the centre of the field with the camera in tow.

Gilda immediately spent no time lingering and grabbed several apples in her wings and one in her talon. She ran out into the centre of the field. Big Macintosh casually picked up an apple in his hoof and slowly turned, only to be hit in the left foreleg causing a stumble. He looked down to see a golden delicious splattered all over his leg. Right after, he heard a splatter on an apple cart behind him. He turned his head immediately to face Gilda, only to have one apple pelt him directly between the eyes. Gilda's cackling prevented any shock from the impact, let alone a blue sky and he quickly swung his arm in a clean fashion, launching an apple through the air.

Gilda had little time to react and dashed to the side only to slip on the wet grass and take an apple to the wing. She fell onto the ground, dropping two apples she still carried. She rolled onto her back to prop herself up with her wings. She reached out with her left talon and snatched the two apples. Another apple pelted her arm, causing her to drop the apples. Big Macintosh, turns out, is a very good shot. He had an actual cart on his back and whenever he wanted an apple, he just did a short gallop causing one to fall off. He proceeded to toss another apple, Gilda barely managing to roll out of the way. She darted off to her side of the field... only to get another apple to the back causing her to fall to the ground and roll, slide, and crash into her own apple cart. Apparently, Big Macintosh is a sharp-shooter too.

Applejack, Twilight, Rarity, Spike, Rainbow, Applebloom, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie all looked on in utter surprise, shock, and nervousness. This could easily go south... but Applejack started to not care. This would be very implausible if it weren't happenin' right in front of m' eyes... Applejack thought to herself, face hoofing.

Rainbow only watched in excitement as the battle started. Spike and Twilight were now pondering a what-if scenario: What if Princess Celestia and Princess Luna had an Apple Battle Royale...? Apparently, the thought was popular because everypony else envisioned others they knew to in one of these Apple Battle Royale's. Pinkie Pie VS. Twilight... Rarity VS. Blueblood... Rainbow Dash VS. Applejack...

"Wait, how did you come across these uniforms, dearie?" Rarity asked, only realizing now that she didn't make any uniforms that looked like the ones worn by the two combatants.

"Ehn, made them myself. Took a course in school for an easy credit. 'nuff said," Rainbow spat out before going back to battle-watching.

All ponies (and dragons) rolled their eyes and focused on the battle. Gilda had gotten up and grabbed an apple in a talon and whipped it on a curve ball. The rain itself plus the wind altered it's course so what normally would have been a miss, nailed Big Macintosh directly in the chest. It startled him a bit but he didn't stop his slow trot towards Gilda's area. Gilda picked up another apple and tossed it at random, again producing the same result as before. The apple pelted Big Macintosh in the side and he reacted by tossing an apple with pinpoint precision, hitting Gilda in the knee of her left leg, causing her to jerk back and hit the latch on a cart. The door came undone and all the apples in the car poured out onto the rainy ground. Gilda let out a gasp and immediately dove behind her cart. This truly felt like an actual battle.

Rainbow thought of something, slowly gathering an idea.

Hmm... tag teams...? That would certainly spruce this up but then it wouldn't be a Stallion VS. Griffon and... wait, when did that become an official thing? Rainbow pondered as she paced around, no longer focusing on the seemingly one sided fight.

Meanwhile, at said seemingly one sided fight...

"Hrrk, is that the best you god, Macky?" Gilda spat out as she prepared herself for the next volley of apples to sail her way.

She clutched two large apples in her talons and stood up, spinning around the crate itself as Big Macintosh came dangerously close to her... side of the field. She growled and shot herself over the crate, doing a twirl in midair with her wings expanded and tossed the apple as hard as she could, watching it sail directly unto the latch of the cart on Big Macintosh's back.

The instant the sound of a metal hitch being undone hit Big Macintosh's ears, he showed an emotion of panic as the latch came undone, bonking him in the head before a large weight in apples shifted. All of the food fell off the cart, causing Big Macintosh to tilt forward and slowly flip over. Unlike Gilda's roll, if he landed on his back, it would count as a blue sky. He snorted and undid the harness from the cart he had on to ensure balance. He slid off, landing on his back hooves. He quickly overturned the cart to grab some apples only to get pelted by three consecutive apples. He saw Gilda whipping many at random, rapidly creating a field of death. Big Macintosh snorted and spun around and galloped back to his field, getting pelted by some of Gilda's long shot, wildly thrown apples. Gilda had nearly spent the total of the apples that had fallen out of the cart and grunted. She picked up the cart and with little effort, she took off the ground and set it up as a defensive wall.

Rainbow chuckled, nudging Applejack.

"Looks like G has this one in the bag, 'jack, ha," Rainbow chuckled.

Applejack gave an uneasy glare to the weather pony, pressing her snout directly against Rainbow Dash.

"Are y'all sayin' my big brother is losin' at an event involvin' apples?" Applejack said, full of venom.

Rainbow was slightly taken aback by the reply, but only for a second. She fixed her brow and her grin and pushed back.

"Market Harvest any different?" Rainbow replied.

Applebloom and Applejack looked at Rainbow Dash with a look of surprise, Applejack's face turning into an immediate scowl. Everypony else on the stand slowly turned to watch the train wreck in slow motion. Applejack let out a few growls.

"Looks like we're extendin' th' teams, RD," Applejack grumbled out before pushing passed everypony else on the bleachers and running over to Big Macintosh's side.

Rainbow spat in surprise. "Hey, no tagging in or ganging up! Gilda, I'm on your team now!" Rainbow shouted before zipping through the fabric roof of the bleachers and shot towards Gilda's side.

"Ho~old your horses, looks like a rule change has been made! It appears that there is now two more combatants entering the game! Will this change the tide of battle?" Spike shouted into the microphone.

Rarity just continued to snap photos, completely unsure of what to make of the explosion in slow motion. Pinkie, Twilight, and Fluttershy watched in sheer confusion, Twilight actually writing notes while doing this.

"Huh? I don't need your help, lame-o. Go back to your stupid bleachers," Gilda demanded as she picked up a few apples.

"Eenope. Go back to th' stands, lil' sis," Big Macintosh said to Applejack.

"NO!" both mares said at the same time.

Gilda and Big Macintosh both shrugged it off and payed no further mind. Applejack immediately latched a cart to her barrel and cantered towards the field. Big Macintosh simply wiggled himself under the cart and stood up, planting the entire cart on his back. Rainbow imitated Applejack but before Gilda could do the same for Big Macintosh, Rainbow stuck a hoof out.

"I pull, you toss. You aim for the tank's cart latches, I'll be aiming for Applejack's head. Applejack is impossible to blue sky with that cart attached to her and Big Mac in the way. We have to take out the juggernaut," Rainbow Dash said, confidently. Gilda shrugged with a nod. "I'll set up our little checkpoint at the overturned cart," Rainbow said.

Gilda smirked. "Don't give me orders, flip-flop. I run my own show. When we get there, I stay to guard, you come back and bring more carts. Defend yourself when you do, 'cause I'll be busy taking out big red," Gilda said, picking up several apples.

"Got it!" Rainbow exclaimed before breaking out into a canter towards the overturned cart.

Gilda flapped her wings and took to the sky with multiple apples in tow. Several in her hands, two in her tail. She soared approximately 10 feet into the air and immediately faced apple-fire from Big Macintosh below.

Rarity was furiously snapping away with her camera, replacing film with more film. She noticed she had run dangerously low on film and turned to Spike who watched in awe as the ultimate battle related to apples took place.

"Spikey-wikey, be a dear and run back to my boutique. I'm in need of photographic film, as this session of uncouth activity is proving to use it all up," she asked politely.

Spike's heart fluttered, even if Rarity wasn't trying to be a flirt or use her charm for something. "Anything for you, my sweet..." Spike said as he dropped the megaphone and darted off.

Rarity waved a hoof. "Spikey-wikey, I never told you where... it is..." she stopped when she realized Spike was long gone.

That little dragon is so charming... she sighed, before turning back to photograph the battle.

"Big Macintosh, y'all go an stay in front. They know Ah'll be the hardest t' take out with the cart latched behind me, so they'll target you. If y'all go in front, it'll give us the advantage since ya hide me from 'em, an' Gilda'll be targetin' ya from th' side; they won't be focusin' on me. I'll focus on th' aerial problem, y'all focus on Rainbow Dash," Applejack said.

Big Macintosh nodded, cantering for a second before placing himself in front of Applejack. Rainbow raised a brow. They know we're supposed to take out Big Macintosh, so why is he in front...? she looked up towards Gilda. "G, be careful. It's like our Junior Speedsters Cloudball against the Fillydelphia Junior Speedsters," Rainbow said.

Gilda let out a chuckle. "Yeah right, I'll stick to my plan," she said, curving to the left and gathering all but one apple in a cradle with her left arm before tossing an apple quickly towards Big Macintosh's left side.

The apple was taken out by another from behind Big Macintosh and Gilda turned her head slightly only to get an apple directly into the face. She wiped the mush and juice off her face to see Applejack whipping multiple red blurs towards her... and at insane precision. Why is the Sweet Apple Acres team full of sharpshooters?

"I just noticed something: THIS ISN'T FAIR! Dashie, I'm coming!" Pinkie shouted before zipping towards Gilda's side of the field.

"Pinkie, wai..." Twilight tried to say before growling in defeat. "Why is it everypony is obsessed about bludgeoning each other with food? What does this have to do with anything?" Twilight shouted out to herself before scribbling more onto her table.

Fluttershy remained quiet, and did so when she peaked over at what Twilight was writing. She squinted; the hole Rainbow created in the awning above let a few drops in, refracting her vision of the paper.

"Pro...ba...bility... of... sce...nario...?" she read quietly to herself.

Twilight's ears perked up. She spun around to face the shy Pegasus. "YES! This is so implausible yet it's happening! Do they not know that Rainbow could possibly not make enough to match the cost of these apples? Do they not know that this contributes absolutely nothing to the Apple Spectrum, or Sweet Apple Acres? And why is nopony getting a concussion from this?" Twilight screamed out before scribbling some more notes down onto the paper.

"Oh... okay... sorry for peeking..." Fluttershy said, backing off as she turned back to the field.

Gilda growled and grabbed yet another apple and tossed it towards Applejack and quickly tossed another at Big Macintosh. Applejack opted to protect her brother from damage and grabbed an apple in her hoof and tossed an apple at the one coming towards Big Macintosh's right shoulder. She took out the apple and prepared for the impact of the second apple before watching it go out too, courtesy of Big Macintosh. Both siblings winked at each other in quick thanks before looking back up as Gilda swooped by and arched back towards Rainbow's little fort, having set up four apple carts next to the overturned apple cart. She unhitched herself from the harness and grabbed a few apples and took to the skies, joining Gilda. She didn't notice as Pinkie zipped into Gilda's field and grabbed an apple herself in her mouth and hopped into battle. Rainbow looked over at Gilda and tilted her head to the left of the Apple Siblings and Gilda shrugged the best she could before she zipped ahead, swooping around. Rainbow took the other side.

"Here they come..." Applejack said, grabbing an apple in her hoof.

"Eeyup," Big Macintosh said, his voice noticeably darker.

Rainbow zipped around and whipped an apple directly at Big Macintosh's cart, hitting the latch but not undoing it. Big Mac grunted and quickly reached up, grabbing an apple and quickly tossing it up in the sky. It soared and with precision, hit Rainbow's left wing. She let out a quick yelp and quickly descended, slowing down only to prevent a complete crash. Gilda growled a bit and almost changed her target to Big Macintosh, only Pinkie cut in.

"DA~ASHIE!" Pinkie screamed out, her pupils shrinking.

Gilda looked over for a second and took this chance to toss an apple. She grabbed the last apple she had and went to toss it but Applejack beat her to the draw, grabbing and tossing another apple towards Gilda, slapping her as she swung her arm back. Pinkie tossed an apple that seemingly teleported when she finished her swing. Big Macintosh had swung his leg out to grab another apple and went to throw it before Pinkie's apple slammed directly into Big Macintosh's forehead. He stumbled backwards and his apple flew out of his hand.

Both apples that hadn't been thrown sailed off to the sides; Big Macintosh's apple fell and tore directly through Twilight's note, just as she finished up her report on Apple Battle Royale Implausibility. Gilda's apple flew into a tree and hit an empty bird's nest.

"My... MY REPORT!" Twilight shrieked before looking up to a shocked Big Macintosh. "AUGH!" Twilight darted off towards Gilda's side.

"BEAKTRIX! YOUR HOME!" Fluttershy squeaked out in absolute horror.

"Uh-" Big Macintosh and Gilda both said at the same time.

"YOU MONSTER!" Fluttershy screeched at Gilda before zipping off towards the Apple Sibling side.

"Wait fer me!" Applebloom shouted as she stumbled off the bleachers, following Fluttershy.

Spike arrived at the last second and dropped a box of film next to Rarity who subconsciously snapped photos in her shock. Spike himself had a jaw drop when he saw every one of his friends, excluding Rarity, had begun to battle.

"So, uh, wha-"

"Don't ask, dear. Just let it flow through your mind..." Rarity said.

Pinkie had zipped back in what one could refer to as teleportation as she grabbed and threw an apple at Big Macintosh who stumbled back with each pelt to the head. Applejack had already whipped the cart of apples she had like a Gatling gun towards Pinkie who had the nerve to pelt her brother. Applebloom and Fluttershy had grabbed apples and were focusing on hitting the griffon in the sky who zipped back and forth, unable to fly back to grab more apples. Twilight levitated an entire cart's worth of apples into the air and shot it into the air at Big Macintosh; exactly like a wall of arrows, Big Macintosh nor Applejack could dodge the mess of fruit. Finally, the seemingly infinite supply of apples on Big Mac was knocked over and rendered unusable. Big Macintosh and Applejack both zipped back towards their side.

Fluttershy had set Applebloom on her back and flew into the sky, both ponies carrying a plethora of apples. Fluttershy had attached a small apple cart to her back and Applebloom slid down, landing in the back. It was just like a chariot full of ammunition. Fluttershy zipped by Gilda's back as the griffon attempted to pelt Applejack who still danced around Big Macintosh in an attempt to protect herself and her brother. Gilda got hit in the back of the head by the smallest Apple sibling. She turned around and got hit in the gut by an apple tossed by Fluttershy.

"YOU... YOU HIT BEAKTRIX'S HOME!" Fluttershy screamed.

"Hey, that nest was empty! Chill!" Gilda said, actually trying to dodge before getting hit by Applejack in the wing, causing the griffon to spin down before reorienting herself.

Fluttershy zipped down on an angle, Applebloom holding on for dear life.

"THEY WERE ON VACATION!" she shouted out, grabbing one more apple and tossing it directly at Gilda's stomach.

Down below, Pinkie let out one more blood curdling scream, tossing one final apple as Big Macintosh turned around, ready to dive back into battle. She whipped an apple, one that could rival a Sonic Rainboom, and pelted the big red pony in the forehead yet again. This was the final hit as he fell back from the shock.

Both Big Macintosh and Gilda landed on their backs, blue skied at the same time and as they did, everypony else in the field slowed down into an awkward silence.

"So... so who won?" Spike asked, scratching his head.

"Uh, nopony won so... we just bludgeoned each other for pretty much no reason?" Rainbow asked, wiping some apple juice off of her wet feathers, letting the rain finish the wash.

Silence took over the scene once more. Each pony rubbing the backs of their necks awkwardly, kicking the ground, Fluttershy shying away at her sudden outburst... a train horn rung out in the distance. Everypony excluding Gilda and Spike shot up in surprise.

"The Train!" they all said in unison.

"Sorry, thanks, good game, gotta go, bye!" Rainbow and Applejack said to the others before zipping off, completely forgetting the others were coming too. By the time everypony, Griffon and Dragon realized what happened, the two rivals were long gone.

Author's Note: Chaotic enough? Sorry for the wait.

Read "Just Friends" by Lonewolf.007.

Mr. Masato/Arby Works.