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Waking Nightmares

by KnightMysterio

Chapter 29: Quick Little Gashes Part 1

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Waking Nightmares

by Jonathan "KnightMysterio" Spires

Chapter 26: Quick Little Gashes part 1

The disclaimer about copyrights from the last chapter will apply to this and all future chapters. This story starts two days after the events of Chapter 25. Also, I would appreciate any help in keeping the TV Tropes page for Waking Nightmares updated and edited. Thanks in advance.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Ponyville...

Carousel Boutique...

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Medic and Rarity sat in the center of the room, Medic's healing beam flowing from his horn to Rarity's body. Spike stood nearby, wringing his hands nervously. The two ponies and dragon sat in silence, staring awkwardly at each other, until a familiar crackling sound emanated from Medic's horn.

"Ready?" Medic asked. Rarity nodded. Medic concentrated, and activated the mental trigger for his Ubercharge. In a surge of magical light, blue armor enveloped Medic's body as Rarity literally swelled with power, her horn growing larger, wings sprouting from her back, and her mane and tail turning ethereal. She felt the might of an alicorn flower inside her...

...but her missing leg wasn't growing back.

Rarity shook her head sadly. Medic cursed, letting the UberCharge fizzle out. "I could have sworn zat vould vurk..."

Spike sighed, plopping down in a nearby chair. "Yeah... Twilight said that might not work. Because the damage was caused by a Smooze creature, it would resist attempts to regrow it..."

Rarity shivered softly. She still remembered how badly it hurt, having her limb crushed, her flesh tearing, her bones cracking like a brittle tree branch... "Merging into EngiRarity didn't work either. We just formed a one-armed human," she said softly.

"There's gotta be someway to restore her leg, though, right?" Spike asked, his face a mirror of Sweetie Belle's when she had gone off to school that morning.

Rarity just smiled sadly. "Spike..."

Medic quirked an eyebrow. "Not restore, but perhaps... replace?"

Rarity and Spike looked at him in confusion. Medic just smirked. "Engineer is coordinating with ze construction crews doing ze rebuilding. Most of ze destroyed robots are being used as materials to help rebuild and reinforce the town, while ze Mayor has commissioned zat several of ze robots ve defeated be smelted down and made into four memorial statues. An Earth pony, a pegasus, a unicorn, und a changeling."

Spike blinked. "A changeling? Seriously?"

"Chrysalis was rather surprised, to say ze least, but Twilight und ze Mayor insisted zat zey be included in ze memorial zat is to be built. The town council agreed after ze Mayor smacked them a few times vith her lead pipe." Medic chuckled wickedly. "I really like her... Anyvay, vhat I am trying to say is zat Engineer is planning on using some of ze robot parts to fashion a cybernetic limb for yourself. He is also talking vith ze Doctor about adding Cyberpony tech as well, to improve it further."

Rarity blinked. "A prosthetic?"

"A new limb," Medic insisted. "Ze Doctor suggested the Cyberpony technology because, according to him, it can uplink directly to your nervous system, meaning you'll be able to feel vith ze limb exactly as you would before."

A slow smile crept across Rarity's face. She looked down at the scarred over lump where her leg used to be. "Do you think it will be all right?"

Spike blinked. "THAT'S what's in the letter Twilight had me send out this morning!" he said, realizing. "You guys were asking permission to access leftover Cyberpony tech!"

Medic nodded, smirking. "Ve'd have to go to Canterlot to perform ze operation und finish ze leg, once we make sure things are stable here. Think you're up to a trip to ze capital for a couple days?"

Rarity just giggled. Spike smirked. "You're asking a high class pony if she wants to go to a high class town? Yeah. Might as well ask water if it wants to be wet."

Spike nodded. "That works out great, actually," he said, pulling out a scroll from a nearby bag. "Princess Celestia and Princess Luna asked both all the Elements and the BLUs to head to Canterlot anyway for a debriefing on what happened here."

Rarity nodded. "That makes sense," she said. "It will be nice to see Princess Celestia again."

Medic unpacking some equipment. "Engineer actually asked me to acquire a blood sample from you," he said, levitating out a syringe. "He und ze Doctor needed it, along vith some other vital statistics, to help vith ze transplant of ze cybernetics."

Rarity grimaced. She had never been fond of needles. But she trusted Medic.

...which felt really odd to think, considering Medic was a self-admitted sadist.

Medic rolled his eyes, sensing her hesitation. "Relax," he said. "I left all my fun tools back at ze hospital. Plus, your bodyguard over zere vill stop me if I get too overexcited during surgery."

"That's right, I will," Spike said, narrowing his eyes and looking as imposing as he knew how.

Medic snorted while Rarity just smiled. He really was such a gentlemanly young dragon.

As Medic gathered the blood sample and started his examination of the three-legged mare, Engineer stepped into the boutique, a tired smile on his face.

"Just checking in on ya, Miss Rarity," he said. He had felt her brief transformation to alicorn, and was disappointed and saddened to see that their last attempt to avoid using the cybernetics had failed.

"Ah, Engie," Medic said as he performed his tests. "Good to see you up and about."

Engineer nodded. "Just doin' some work to catch up on this," he said. "Ah don't like leavin' mistakes I made uncorrected." He sighed, the guilt over his transformation into Nightmare Clockwork nagging at him.

Rarity, sensing this, frowned. "Now, don't you worry, Dell," she said. "What happened was not your fault. You were poisoned by the Smooze and not in your right mind because of the time displacement."

"It feels like it is, though," Engineer said. "And while ah appreciate Trixie bein' willing to take on all the memories of the pain ah've suffered..." He paused briefly, and said. "No, nevermind, not gonna say anything. Ah won't demean what she did by complainin.'"

Medic sighed softly. "She has done much for us," the mad scientist said. "In a single courageous gesture, ze Great and Powerful Trixie brought you back to us vhen we vere at a total loss at how to save you..."

Engineer just smiled. Ever since he had woken up, the rest of the team had almost always taken the time to refer to the showmare by her preferred title. It didn't change the guilt he felt for his own part in everything that happened, despite the fact that he didn't remember it, despite the insistence his teammates made to the contrary. Trixie shouldn't have to suffer for his own sins...

Ah well. Focus on the practical problems.

"Twilight says we have to be in Canterlot this evening, give the Princesses a debriefing on the recent attacks," Engineer said.

"Ja," Medic said, nodding. "Herr Spike just gave us ze word himself. Vhat of ze captains?"

"Harbinger's comin' back with us," Engineer said. "And from what I get from Power Words and Swift Saber, Twilight's guards, Barricade's gonna remain here and set up a watch. Lyra and Bon Bon, of all ponies, have volunteered to help set things up."

Rarity smiled. "Lyra's always been eager to help everypony," she said. "Although sometimes I question her fashion choices. Did you know she once went around in a black hoodie? It clashed so badly with her coat. And she claims she wore it to AVOID getting noticed." The marshmallow white unicorn shook her head, tutting.

Engineer chuckled. Medic rolled his eyes, going over to the medical bags he brought with him. "It should be interesting, seeing Canterlot," he said. "I look forward to seeing ze nature of zere equipment."

Rarity smiled and stood up again, staggering a little. She limped awkwardly over to her couch, sitting down on it. "It really is a truly fabulous city," she said, looking over at Engineer. "Although I dare say they've never really seen the likes of you nine before."

"Note to self: Keep Scout silent at all times, so ve do not make a bad impression," Medic said, Rarity and Engineer chuckling.

"How are Barricade, Gem, and Pyro?" Rarity asked. "They took a lot of punishment during all of this."

Engineer smiled. "Gem's fine. She and Pyro are playing in the park," he said. "As for Barricade... well, she'll be fine." He chuckled.

Rarity frowned. "What is it?"

"Fluttershy's father, Doctor TL Care, arrived in town today," Engineer said, smirking. "Let's just say that I fully understand Fluttershy's personality now that I've met her parents."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Hospital...

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"I can't BELIEVE YOU!" the small, canary yellow pegasus with the salmon-colored mustache and mane said as he whapped Barricade over and over again with a newspaper. "You PROMISED me you wouldn't take so many risks anymore!"

"Ow! OW!" Barricade said, the massive mare covering her head as her husband railed at her, a grin not leaving her face. The newspaper wouldn't have hurt normally, but with her recent battles... "Concussion and skull fracture, remember?"

The smaller stallion's eyes were filled with tears as he looked her over. "Among other injuries. Damn it, you told me you'd take less risks once you got promoted to Captain!"

Barricade shrugged, wincing. "Couldn't be helped, TL," she said. "Had to do something, otherwise the town would have been destroyed."

"Captain Harbinger told me you were brainwashed. AGAIN," TL said, the comparatively tiny pegasus glaring at her with as much authority as his adorable eyes could muster.

Harbinger, you tattling little shit-for-brained... Barricade thought. "...Mmmmaybe," she admitted, coughing nervously. She always had a weakness to mental spells...

TL Care shook his head. "...Barri, please," he said. "Take care of yourself. If something were to happen to you or to Fluttershy... I don't know what I'd do."

Barricade just smiled, kissing him. "You'd soldier on. Same as any other," she said. "I know you, TL. You're a lot stronger than you ever give yourself credit for. And not just because you have my oversized plot to hide behind."

TL chuckled a little, shaking his head. "...It's going to get worse, isn't it," he said softly.

Barricade nodded solemnly. "I can't go into details, not even to you," she said in a surprisingly quiet voice. "But we're in major trouble here. This town's always been a weirdness magnet, but now things are getting serious. Too many ponies have died, TL. Plus..." She shook her head.

TL Care shivered softly. "Oh Barri... I wish you didn't have to take these risks..." he said, nuzzling up close to his massive mate.

Barricade smiled, a surprisingly gentle expression in her fierce eyes. "Someone has to, love. It's what my Cutie Mark is for. Being that impenetrable iron wall that nopony can get by. Just like yours is for healing," she said, gesturing to the bandaged heart on her husband's flank.

TL shivered. "Just... take better care of yourself, okay?" He gently ran his hooves over the bandaged part of her skull, sighing. He removed the bandages, revealing the large, swollen welt from where she had headbutted Nightmare Juggernaut, and began replacing them with new ones.

As he changed the bandages, Heavy wandered in.

"Ah! Giant pony is doing better?" he said, smiling. "I come to check on you for tiny flutter pony." TL eeped and hid behind Barricade, the larger pegasus chuckling.

"I'm fine, Heavy. My hubby's taking care of my injuries," she said, motioning to the comparatively small pegasus with the light yellow coat behind him.

"You are huge and scary," TL managed after a moment.

Heavy chortled. "Do not fear me. Heavy Weapons Guy is friend to all doctors!"

"That's nice," TL said, grinning weakly, visibly shaking. Is he one of the mercenaries Barri mentioned in her last letter? He's huge...

Barricade chuckled. "I know how to get him out, don't worry," she said. "TL? Honey? This is Heavy Weapons Guy, one of the Builders League United mercenaries. He's the one I headbutted while he was poisoned by Smooze."

Heavy could swear he heard an audible clicking sound, TL Care doing a complete 180 as he came out from his hiding place to examine Heavy, hovering around his head.

"Are you all right? Any lasting headaches from the injury? Any residuals from your transformation?" the pegasus asked, all business, all fearless. Once Barricade had mentioned Heavy's injuries, in TL's mind the mercenary had gone from 'large scary thing' to 'patient.' And no amount of fear would stop him from helping a patient.

Heavy chuckled. "I am fine, tiny doctor pony. Restoring Engineer's form restored mine as well. No injuries remain," he said.

TL frowned. "Still, I'd prefer you to undergo an examination," he said. "I don't fully trust 'magical' cures. It's no substitute for professional treatment and some tender loving care."

Barricade smiled. It was always a pleasure to watch her husband work. Heavy shook his head. "I cannot. BLU and Elements of Harmony are needed in Canterlot. Fluttershy is getting ready now, asked me to check on you two. She said she'd be by before we all left."

TL blinked. "Oh... does she have to leave so quickly?"

Barricade quirked an eyebrow. "Princess Celestia has called. Fluttershy is a defender of the realm, she has to answer," she said.

"Somepony as sweet and gentle as her shouldn't have to put herself at risk..." TL said, sighing.

Barricade hugged him. "I know..." she said softly. "But she's stronger, so much stronger than even she herself realizes. We have to give her the chance to show that strength."

Heavy thumped his chest. "I will protect little flutter pony," he said. "Do not worry."

"I'm holding you to that," TL said, frowning.

At that point, Harbinger came in. "Ah, TL. Good to see you here," he said.

TL Care scowled and threw his newspaper at Harbinger, the projectile striking him in the face.

"Nice to see you too," Harbinger said.

TL threw a pillow at him, Harbinger not bothering to dodge. "You broke your promise again," TL snapped. "Barricade got hurt, and my daughter was put in danger."

"Look, I can understand why you're mad," Harbinger said. TL threw a bedpan. This time Harbinger did dodge. "Is it my fault your wife has a policy of 'smash first, crush second, break third, and ask questions only if she remembers to?!'"

"YES," TL said, tossing a bottle. Harbinger caught it and set it down. TL moved to throw something else, but Barricade stopped him.

"Let's not break more of the hospital's property than we have to, okay?" Barricade said.

TL just scowled.

"A million things terrify him and I'm not one of them," Harbinger muttered. Heavy and Barricade both laughed. Harbinger shook his head. "I'm escorting the BLUs and Elements to Canterlot. What's the plan for here?"

"I've put in for a transfer to Ponyville to help with any medical needs here," TL Care said, sighing wearily. "If what Barri said is true, you're going to need all the doctors you can get in short order."

Barry? Heavy thought, amused by the nickname.

Harbinger nodded. "Your talents will be greatly appreciated, TL," he said.

Barricade nodded. "I'm staying here, both to recover from my injuries and to help coordinate the recovery and protection of the town while the BLUs and Elements are away. I've already got several volunteers. Mare-Do-Well's gone back to Manhattan and the Wonderbolts back to Cloudsdale, but they've both agreed to be on call if need be."

Harbinger nodded. "All right," he said. "You two take care. We'll be leaving for Canterlot in an hour or so."

"Good luck," Barricade said. "Keep our Fluttershy safe."

Heavy nodded. "Heavy will protect her, do not fear."

TL chuckled weakly. "It's because I fear that I've stayed alive so long. It helps me take things seriously," he said.

Heavy gained a thoughtful look on his face, having never considered that side of things before.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Human world...

2Fort...

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

"You wished to speak with me?" Merasmus said as RED Sniper entered into his quarters.

"Yeah... Sorry about the nutshot from me earlier, we tend to get tense when our mates are in danger," he said.

Merasmus thought about it and decided to just let it go. "Understandable," he said. "You are forgiven, and I appreciate the respect you showed me in coming here."

RED Sniper nodded, sitting down by Merasmus's desk. "...I actually need some help," he said.

Merasmus nodded, putting down the book he had been reading. "What can I do?"

"My transformation during the whole mess at the mine, the Christian Brutal Sniper... that's actually a real part of me. Everything I hate about myself, suppressed. And he got out... I couldn't stop him..." RED Sniper said.

Merasmus frowned. "...You wish for help to control him," the wizard said.

RED Sniper nodded. "The worst part about it is... if I understood what he said correctly before he locked me in my own mind, then BLU Sniper's already figured out to keep him in line. It's humiliating..."

Merasmus looked thoughtful, and began sifting through his books. "There are mind-delving spells. It's risky, but there are ways to confront this dark part of yourself..."

RED Sniper nodded. "I need to get this done," he said. "I can't risk the possibility of Christian Brutal Sniper taking over my body again. Do this, and I'll owe you one, so long as it doesn't hurt me mates."

Merasmus nodded, smirking. "A dangerous thing to say to a wizard such as I. What if I were to ask for your immortal soul?"

Bombinomicon chose this moment to float off of its shelf and chime in. "He doesn't know how to steal souls. Plus his hat doesn't actually steal souls, it just glares at you menacingly."

RED Sniper visibly relaxed. Merasmus glared at the book, who just calmly floated around the room, giggling. "I live to troll you!" the book said, cackling.

"Wretched thing," Merasmus muttered. "At any rate, I DO know a spell which can help you confront Christian Brutal Sniper. I agree that letting that menace go unchecked could be dangerous."

RED Sniper sighed. "Anything you can do would be appreciated, Merasmus."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Pony world...

Friendship Express...

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

The BLUs, Gem Sentry, RED Spy, Spike, and Elements of Harmony, all of those that had them wearing their artifact necklaces (or tiara in Twilight's case) ended up having a whole car to themselves, chatting quietly as the train made its way into Canterlot. When the train entered the tunnel, Pyro began to panic.

"Too dark!" she yelped, running back and forth. "Too dark!"

"Can't believe we forgot she's scared of the dark..." Soldier muttered. "Calm down and that's an order!"

"Least it is'nae as bad as when we first got here," Demoman chuckled. "She nearly burnt down the whole ruddy forest..."

Flames started to dance around Pyro's body. Gem squeaked and hid behind Engineer, frightened. "Too dark! TOO DARK!" Pyro wailed. RED Spy took to the air reflexively, twitching when Pyro came near him.

Every other unicorn in the room and Twilight lit their horns, creating a soft glow that lit up the car during the brief trip through the tunnel. Engineer moved to comfort her, but Trixie got there first.

"Pyro! Pyro..." the showmare said in a soft voice. "I know it's scary. I know what the cold and the dark can do to you. But the darkness always goes away. Believe in that."

Even as Trixie finished saying it, the train emerged from the tunnel. Trixie smiled. "See? Nothing to worry about," she said, hugging the firebug. Pyro shivered.

"S-Sorry..." she said quietly. "I just... I don't like the dark... It reminds me too much of home..."

"A Dark Element of Harmony scared of the dark," Scout said, chuckling. "There's freakin' irony for you."

Trixie snickered. "At least she didn't pee herself when I showed an image of Discord," she said, Pyro giggling.

Scout fumed. "I did no such thing!" he snapped.

Medic patted him condescendingly. "There there... He tries so hard. But despite his mother's best efforts little accidents do happen," the sadist surgeon said.

"The ONLY time I have EVER gotten piss on me in the past few years is because of the RED Sniper's fuckin' Jarate!" Scout snarled.

"Keep tellin' yourself that, laddie," Demoman said, taking a sip of scrumpy. "Ye just might believe it one day!"

Scout growled and went to the back of the car, away from the others as the BLUs all shared a laugh at his expense.

The Elements watched this exchange with a mix of amusement and bewilderment. Twilight quirked an eyebrow. "Is this some aspect of male friendship I'm unfamiliar with? This relentless insulting?"

Sniper chuckled. "All part of the game, sheila," he said. "Scout knows we don't mean it."

"Most of it, anyway," Spy added.

Soldier snorted. "The kid's problem is that he's got skin as thin as paper. Dodging can only do so much. You have to be able to TAKE a hit as well."

Derpy frowned. "Are you talking about actual fighting or taunting?"

Soldier shrugged. "In the end, it's all the same, isn't it? Life is a series of battles. You just have to work to win each one."

"That makes more sense than it should," Derpy admitted after a moment.

Pinkie Pie bounced over to Scout, nuzzling him. "You gonna be okay?" she asked.

Scout snorted. "Yeah, they're just dicks," he said. "I don't ever get mad, I just get even."

Pinkie Pie frowned. "...You aren't gonna do anything TOO bad to them, are you?" she asked hesitantly.

"Just a few harmless pranks, that's all," Scout said, smirking.

Pinkie Pie giggled. "Need some help with them?"

Scout shook his head. "Nah, I got this. The best plans take time to execute," he said. Hopefully I can get it done before we have to go back, he thought. He then frowned, wondering why the thought of leaving hurt so much... He shook his head, dismissing the thought.

In another car, Harbinger and the Doctor conversed.

"You're sure you can keep the Cyberpony technology from dominating Rarity's mind?" he asked.

The Doctor rolled his eyes. "Everypony keeps asking me that..." he muttered. "Of course I can. I've fought them enough times throughout the centuries to know how their tech works. The emotion suppressor chip is the only thing we have to worry about, and that's always gone in the chestplate. Any other hostile tech I can easily remove. We're just needing a leg. In addition to that, we're going to incorporate some of Gray Mann's technology into it. His obedience protocols are astonishingly potent. Rarity's new leg will do only what she wants it to and nothing else."

Harbinger nodded, sighing. "Sorry if I seem tense," he said. "I'm just not happy about having to go back to Court. With Barricade in Ponyville and Shining Armor a Prince of the Empire, I have to lead the Royal Guard until Shining's replacement is decided upon."

The Doctor blinked, quirking an eyebrow in amusement. "Still no luck on finding somepony to replace him?"

Harbinger grumbled. "Everypony we've tried either has been underqualified, couldn't take it, or was a goddamn useless noble..."

The Doctor chuckled. "And now the real reason for your distaste with the Royal Court comes out," he said.

Harbinger just snorted. "Damn fools... If I had my way I'd round them all up and send them all to the Home Guard... Fancy Pants and his ilk are about the only ones I can tolerate..."

The Doctor grinned. "Oh, the nobles serve their purpose, as do all things," he said amiably.

Harbinger snorted, flaring his nostrils. "What purpose could a bunch of useless, rich, stuffed shirt, arrogant, overblown fools have?" he asked.

"To make the Princesses look good by comparison," the Doctor said simply, sipping his tea and munching on a Jammy Dodger. (It had taken him months of pestering every cookie maker he could find to get the cookie made in Equestria, but damned if he was going to go without one of his favorite snacks in any of his forms.)

Harbinger had to chuckle at that. Almost immediately, though, he began coughing, clutching his bandaged chest as his broken ribs dug into him. He shook his head. "Shining Armor unavailable due to his responsibilities in the Crystal Empire. Discord trapped in stone again because of his guilt over an old mistake. One of the Light Elements of Harmony crippled. The Dark Elements of Harmony incomplete. Barricade forced into a command-only position because of her injuries, and me unable to use my speed until my own injuries heal and my internal magic reserves restore themselves. Plus despite her promise of allegiance, I still don't fully trust Chrysalis," he said, sighing. "And Slendermane now has an army of robots and an evil genius backing him. We are at a severe disadvantage here..."

The Doctor sipped his tea calmly. "I've told you about the odds I've overcome before, haven't I? The number of times I've rendered the Daleks extinct."

Harbinger quirked an eyebrow. "There's still the fact that they keep coming back," he said.

The Doctor scowled, waving a hoof idly. "Time travel makes the concept of things staying dead all... all wibbly-wobbly..."

"'Wibbly-wobbly?'" Harbinger said, chuckling.

The Doctor snorted. "At any rate, what I'm trying to get at is that I've faced similar odds with far less assets, usually just a companion and her lippy boyfriend," he said. "And each time, I've come out the victor."

"A fine thought, Doctor," Harbinger said. "But what did those victories cost you?"

The Doctor said nothing, looking away.

"I thought so," Harbinger said, nodding. "Victory has its price. Always. The question is always how much you're willing to pay."

"There are times you can get away with a full win," the Doctor insisted. "There are times when you can walk away from the battle, and everybody lives."

"I don't believe in miracles, Doctor," Harbinger said softly.

The Doctor's ears flattened as he scowled. "Never did get along with military..." he said, sipping his tea.

"Naivety will only get you so far," Harbinger said, closing his eyes and sighing. "Of the few things in this world I am certain of, that simple fact is near the top of the list..."

The rest of the trip to Canterlot passed uneventfully. They pulled into the station and got out, the Doctor excusing himself to head over to where the Cyberpony technology was located, Spike insisting on helping Rarity down the stairs.

"I shall be your legs, Lady Rarity!" he said, positioning himself at the stump of her limb.

Rarity giggled. "Spike, dear, that's very sweet of you, but there's a few problems with that plan," she said.

Spike blinked.

Rarity smiled indulgently. "Firstly, to truly be my leg, you'd need to hold still and hold on... and your claws kind of hurt."

Spike eeped, releasing his grip.

"Secondly... you're a little taller than my foreleg," Rarity said, kissing him on the cheek.

Spike blushed, realizing she was right. Then he nearly fainted in joy from her kiss.

Rarity sighed. "And finally, I'm fairly certain I'd get arrested for abuse if I used you as a prosthetic. Even though you're a volunteer, there's rules about this sort of thing we have to follow."

Spike grumbled, giving up. "Are you sure you don't need my help?"

Rarity nodded, looking uneasily at the steps down. After a moment, she shook her head and teleported down, smiling. "See? Easy as pie."

"Pie?" Pinkie Pie said, appearing next to Rarity. "What kind of pie? Because I've had a real craving for blueberry pie lately."

The others just chuckled, disembarking from the train themselves. Almost immediately, the BLUs were struck by the shining majesty of the city.

"Wow..." Scout said softly, admiring the shining buildings.

"Everything's so PRETTY!" Pyro said, giggling.

"Magnifique," RED Spy said softly.

Gem let out a trilling beep, visibly in awe. This whole place is shinier than ME! she thought excitedly.

Engineer nodded, pleased. "Good architecture," he said. "Solid. If we have time once Rarity's surgery is done, I'd like to see the supports that hold this city up against the side of the mountain."

Twilight grinned. "I'll see if it can be arranged," she said.

Only Heavy seemed unimpressed. He just snorted as he looked around the town and said nothing, retrieving his saddlebags. He glared at the well-dressed ponies milling about the station, all with their noses subconsciously in the air.

"What's wrong?" Fluttershy asked, sensing her partner's discomfort.

"City of the rich and elite," Heavy said, snorting again. "Over-privileged bourgeois who live off of the sweat of their workers."

"Oh here we go," Soldier muttered. "Save the communist propaganda for those who actually care, Heavy."

"I am Bolshevik," Heavy declared, thumping his chest proudly. "I serve the proletariat. And nothing will ever change that."

"You seem perfectly fine with the princesses," Engineer said, amused.

"And you don't mind hangin' out with a buncha capitalists," Scout added, smirking.

Heavy shrugged. "Princesses actually care about welfare of the people. I have no issue with rulers who care for those underneath them. But just from looking at this lot around us, I can tell they are exactly the kind of privileged elite my people revolted against years ago," he said, smirking and adding, "and as for you lot... well, nobody's perfect. I don't hold your faults against you."

The other BLUs snickered and shook their heads. Heavy's beliefs were clearly an old argument for them. Spy decided to get the last word in, saying, "And what about your vast collection of headwear and the like?"

"Is different," Heavy said, smirking. "A man is not complete without a large collection of hats."

This got a chuckle out of the entire group. Twilight, through Spike, sent a message summoning for several air chariots to take them to the palace.

"I don't mind walking, deary," Rarity said. "I'm grateful, certainly, but really, I wouldn't mind sightseeing and taking it slow. It HAS been a while since I've been here."

Twilight nuzzled her. "You can walk around all you like once we get you a new leg," she said, Rarity blushing.

The trip went uneventfully, the BLUs and Gem watching the city pass by beneath them with amazement. The chariots landed in a courtyard, a contingent of guards meeting them. The procession was led by four Earth ponies, each carting large, glowing, green-colored lanterns. They flashed the magical lights over the gathered ponies, Spy and RED Spy flinching and covering their eyes as the light passed over them.

"What ze hell was zat?" Spy demanded.

"Standard procedure," Harbinger said. "We may have a truce with the changelings right now, but ever since the invasion that took place during Princess Cadence and Shining Armor's wedding, we've had these detectors in place. Everyone coming into or out of the palace gets scanned."

One of the guards looked worriedly at the Spies. "Sir..." she said. "They reacted to the lanterns."

"They're half-breeds, here with special permission of the Princesses," Harbinger said, Twilight nodding in confirmation. The guards seemed uneasy about it, but decided not to say anything and just agree with their Captain.

"Princess Twilight Sparkle, Guardian of Everfree, is here at the request of Princesses Celestia and Luna to give a report on the recent battle that took place in Ponyville." She gestured to the gathered ponies, and said, "I also bring the Elements of Harmony, the other-dimensional mercenaries known as Builders League United, and a representative of Reliable Excavations and Demolitions for audience with the Princesses as well."

Harbinger stepped forward. "I am confirming these orders and am also taking up duties as head of the Royal Guard in Captain Barricade's absence."

The guards nodded. "We accept you and welcome you all to Canterlot," the lead guard said, the words clearly practiced. "Please follow us and we will present you to their Majesties."

The group was led through a long, opulent hallway, the BLUs marveling at the architecture of the palace. They paused outside a long hallway filled with stained glass windows, when one of the guards turned to the group and said, "If the mercenaries would please wait outside? The princesses have requested to speak with Captain Harbinger and the Elements of Harmony by themselves first."

Scout frowned. "Why?"

Harbinger understood. "The Elements and the princesses are dear friends with one another. Wouldn't it make sense that before anything else, you would want to make sure that your friends were all right?"

The gathered mares all grinned widely. The mercenaries could find no reason to contest that, so they simply sat back as the guards led the Elements inside, two white-coated unicorn guards standing outside the door.

"So I guess we wait then," Scout said, flitting about the room and admiring the stained-glass windows. The others simply sat down, waiting to be called it.

Gem trotted about aimlessly, tooting her toy horn as boredom set in quickly. The magitek mechanism began following a bug around the outskirts of the hall, amused by the way it trundled along, Gem crawling on her belly to keep up with it. Pyro began playing with flames, making butterflies out of them and having them float about the room, making the guards and RED Spy nervous. For a few minutes, nothing happened.

And then someone new entered the hallway.

"And who, may I ask, let you ruffians in the palace?" said the elegant unicorn as he strode haughtily up to the BLUs. He was a handsome creature, his coat a shimmering white, his blonde mane perfectly coiffed. He wore a jacket which was immaculately clean and pressed.

Heavy's eyes narrowed. Scout snickered. "Who's this ponce?"

The unicorn glared at Scout. "It's pronounced 'Prince.' Prince Blueblood," he said. "You may all bow respectfully now.

Heavy growled. Demoman rolled his eye. "Oh here we go..."

Blueblood looked them over, frowning. Only the guards bowed, their expressions eternally neutral, the BLUs were just staring at him with expressions ranging from annoyance to amusement, Pyro ignoring him completely and playing with fire butterflies.. "I can't help but notice that you aren't showing the respect I deserve," Blueblood said.

Engineer quirked an eyebrow. "Respect's gotta be earned, pardner. Y'all ain't done that, yet," he said.

Blueblood gagged. "Good HEAVENS your accent," he said, sticking out his tongue. "I never knew a unicorn could be such a RUBE."

Engineer's eyes narrowed beneath his goggles, but he said nothing.

Blueblood shook his head. "Out of my way, peasants, I have come to seek audience with my Aunties," he said.

"Forgive me, your highness," one of the guards said, "but the Elements of Harmony are already inside, and the Princesses have asked to meet them alone. The mercenaries are to join them shortly."

Blueblood grumped, pouting. "Oh for Heaven's sake. Hired killers? In the PALACE?" he said, indignant. "Plus THOSE show-offs again..."

Soldier snarled. "Those 'show-offs' have saved this world more times than you've probably given sincere compliments to someone, maggot," he said.

Blueblood glared at him. "Mind your tone, vassal. You've no idea what I can do to make trouble for you," he said.

Heavy growled. "You. You are embodiment of everything I hate. The bourgeois, entitled rich who think that just because they have money that they are meaningful," he snarled.

Blueblood actually smirked. "Ah. You must be of the 'labor movement.,'" he said. "Trust me, brat, that will never get off the ground. My family has been of noble title for centuries, descended directly from Celestia and Luna themselves!"

"Drunken one night stands that result in a random foal don't count bein' born noble, pally," Scout quipped, Sniper snickering.

"Mind your tone, whelp, or I..." Blueblood paused, noticing Pyro for the first time. He put on a winning smile and sauntered over to her. "At least one of your number is worthy of attention, it seems."

Engineer moved to stop him, but Scout held out a hoof to get him to back off, wanting to see where this went.

Blueblood grinned. "Well hello there, beautiful," he said, the mercenaries groaning inwardly at the cheap pickup line. "And who, pray tell, are you?"

Pyro blinked, her fire butterflies vanishing as she noticed Blueblood for the first time. "Hi!" she said pleasantly. "I'm Pyro. And you are?"

"Prince Blueblood," he said, posing grandly, his horn flashing discreetly and creating a perfectly timed dramatic breeze, "Lord Regent of Canterlot, Nephew to the Princesses of the Sun and Moon."

Pyro giggled. "You have a long name," she said.

"That's not the only thing that's long," he said, waggling his eyebrows. Pyro just stared at him, confused, not getting it.

Engineer started to protest, but Scout interrupted him. "Careful pal," Scout said. "She's the type of mare who'll set your balls on fire." Take the bait, take the bait, take the bait...

Blueblood smirked. "My my," he said, getting the wrong idea. "I like the sound of that."

Pyro stared at him for a long moment, and then shrugged, her horn flashing once.

"AGH, MY BALLS ARE ON FIRE!" Blueblood screamed, trailing flames from his crotch as he ran out of the hall, heading for the nearest fountain. The other BLUs and RED Spy laughed uproariously, Gem looking up in confusion. The robot had missed the exchange entirely, having been focused on following her bug. (She was debating making it a pet and calling it Fred.)

"Well, zat was pointless," RED Spy said. "Amusing, but pointless."

"It killed time, lads," Demoman said. "And we did'nae have to kill anyone either."

"He said he'd like it," Pyro pouted, still confused.

The guards frowned. "He CAN make trouble for you," one of the guards said. "With his connections, he can have you barred from several important places."

"Oooh, real scary," Scout said, doing a lazy loop-de-loop in midair.

Spy snickered. "As if people not wanting us there has ever kept us out of a place we wanted to be before," he said.

A loud thump came from behind the door. The BLUs, Gem, RED Spy, and the guards all froze, looking at the door. Gem nervously deployed her chainguns, revving them up in case she needed to attack.

One of the guards hesitantly knocked on the door. "...Princess?"

The door burst open, darkness washing over them all before they could do anything to stop it.

"No... No! It can't be... I KILLED YOU! I KILLED YOU!"

TO BE CONTINUED...

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