Best Night Ever (Extended Edition) Part 3

"I'm glad you're happy Dash." said Luna. "But that still leaves some ponies who got pretty badly let down."

Twilight Sparkle spoke up. "I'm alright actually. At least I've gotten to be with Princess Celestia, even if we haven't talked much about what I've learned. Out of all of us, I think Applejack's suffered the worse. I know how much it meant to her to be able to sell her apples here. She was going to replace the roof of Sweet Apple Acres barn, and get a new plough, and an operation for Granny Smith's hip."

She looked aside to Rarity, and over to Pinkie Pie. "I know you didn't find a prince, and you didn't get your party, but Applejack didn't just not make any money, she's wasted all the apples, and the ingredients she used to make all that food. She's lost money, and all because those Gala goers were too busy keeping their noses in the air to smell just how good her baking was."

"Aw Twi, it ain't that bad." Applejack interjected. "I kinda messed up, figuring this'd be more like a carnival. Pinkie Pie's parties always have food, I should have figured a fancy shmancy ball would have it's own catering. Besides, we had to replace the barn anyway after the para-sprites ate the old one."

Twilight hung her head. "I'm sorry about that. My spell was supposed to stop them eating altogether..." Suddenly she realised who was listening, eyes widening in panic. "Uh, that is, no para-sprites, just big moths, I completely did not half-wreck Ponyville by miscasting a spell..."

"Sugar-cube, I think Princess Celestia figured out what happened." Applejack said, glancing over at the white alicorn. "I know it seemed a mite convenient that she decided to cancel her visit, 'specially after she saw Pinkie Pie parade those critters past her."

Celestia nodded her head once at the farmer."I also received a report from the Mayor. I know what really happened, and that a certain unicorn worked harder than any three others with magic and her telekinesis to fix things. Spells on living things are particularly difficult, especially cast without preparation."

Luna winced. "I still remember the platypus. Long story, don't want to talk about it, ever!"

After a suitable moment of silence, Applejack went on. "Better the barn than the apple trees. That would have put us out of business. I've lost a few bits tonight, but it won't mean I can't buy Apple Bloom new schoolbooks, or Granny her favourite brand of tea. What really gets my dander up is that no-one even tried anything, exceptin' Soarin."

"And Blueblood, that ingrate." Rarity fumed. "I don't think he even tasted it before he spit it out. If he truly didn't like it, something I find impossible to believe, he could have held it in his mouth until we were well away and disposed of it politely in a napkin. Well at least I can pay you the four bits for them."

"I said I got ya covered on that." Applejack tossed her head back, closing off discussion.

Twilight sighed. "I know how you feel about accepting help, even though you give it freely enough, but we'd all like to find a way for you to break even at least."

"T'ain't that so much, as I gave my word, and I ain't goin' back on it." the earth pony replied. "I can still take the stuff I have left over back to Ponyville, and sell it there, some at least."

"Well I wouldn't mind trying one of them." said Luna.

"Sure thing, Luna. If'n Pony Joe says it's okay."

The unicorn gave a nod. "Matter of fact, I wouldn't mind trying one myself after all I've been hearing. If you don't mind letting the competition in on it."

Twilight's horn started glowing again, and Applejack said, "It's alright Twi, I want to go check on my cart anyhow."

Shortly, both Luna and Pony Joe had an apple fritter in front of them. Luna lifted hers with her telekinesis and sampled it, then immediately started munching on the rest like she hadn't had three doughnuts. "Mmmm! This is really good!"

Pony Joe was holding his up in front of him the same way. "You're right there, Princess! I may specialise in doughnuts, but I can do other pastries, and this is as good as anything I ever made, maybe better."

"And ain't you both kind for saying it." said a pleased Applejack. "It's mostly the quality of the apples, but I like to think I'm pretty good at cookin' 'em up too."

Luna finished off hers, and said, "Well if you aren't wedded to taking it back with you, I'll take whatever you have left." She suddenly looked puzzled. "I don't actually have the money on me...to be honest, I haven't needed to buy anything since... I woke up. Uh, sis, how do we buy something. I used to have a sack of gold pieces in a drawer back at the summer palace in case I needed something, but I didn't think to look before we left."

"You would have needed to move most of a tower, from what I saw, that end of the palace was rubble." Celestia shook her head, and the others realised they were talking about the ruined castle in the Everfree forest. It brought home to them just who they were talking to.

"Applejack can do what Pony Joe will do, send a receipt to the palace treasurer, and he'll charge it to our personal expenses and send her the money."

"I don't expect you to buy everything, Luna." Applejack said. "I've still got pretty much everything I cooked up. That's a passel more than any pony could eat, before they go off anyhow."

"That's what stasis spells are for." Luna grinned.

"Stasis spells?" Twilight said eagerly.

Luna looked confused. "Wait, this is the future right? Flying chariots and ponies in shiny suits and messages across the length of Equestria instantly by flame-mail. You're telling me no-one remembers how to do a simple stasis spell?"

Celestia shook her head. "Simple to us, but remember, most unicorns don't have that much power. I'm sure a modern rune-set could handle it, but I never really considered it. It's been so long since I could find the time to do some spell research. A box where closing the lid completes the rune-set... Twilight, I know you scored high marks in your Modern Runes class. Maybe you and Luna could work together on this."

"I'd be honoured." Twilight said, then remembered what Luna had said earlier. "I mean I'd love to!"

"I'd like that too." Luna smiled back. "The spell books I'm studying take things for granted that we hadn't considered back when I was spell-crafting. I have a thousand years of catching up to do. If you'd be willing to help out."

"Yes! Oh yes please!" Twilight's eyes gleamed. "You must know other spells long since lost, that aren't in any grimoire. A chance to learn them study them..."

Rarity whispered to Applejack. "Goodness, I think she's going to go Pinkie Pie."

But the purple unicorn calmed herself down with an effort. "But we were talking about Applejack's goods. Applejack, just what do you have left, and what were you selling them for?"

The Earth pony thought. "let me reckon it up, forty eight caramel apples at a bit a piece, six big old apple pies at eight bits, twenty apple fritters for two bits each, and twenty four bags of apple fries at two bits, twenty four apple cobblers at four bits and forty eight bottles of my own Sweet Apple Acres fresh pressed apple juice at three bits a pop."

Twilight had a pencil and paper from somewhere and was writing it down as Applejack spoke. "I make it three hundred and fifty two bits. That's nice amount, but I'd hardly have thought it would be enough to buy a hip replacement."

"Well, I did have a whole lot more apples, and fixin's to bake 'em up, but they all went into that high falutin' cake. So that ain't gonna be much use."

Pinkie Pie spoke up, surprisingly subdued. "I'm sorry. I was the one that landed on the cake, or at least landed on the cart, and made it go flying, which would have been fun if it was a prank, but it wasn't and I ruined your cake, and your night, and I got Rarity all covered in cake, sorry Rarity, and I'd pay you for it but all my money goes on party supplies, but I will make you a replacement cake..."

"Don't you fret none, Pinkie." Applejack shushed her. "I don't see how I could have made any money off of that cake anyhow. By that time, I was tearing mad, and just wanted them to try it and acknowledge that my cooking, and my apples, were worth something. 'Sides, you were expectin' to be caught."

Twilight examined the paper. "Actually, I'm surprised you were selling so cheaply. I came with Spike to Pony Joe's for an occasional treat while I was at the Academy, because he does really good doughnuts at a good price, but they're still more expensive than this. And as for some of the fancy cafés in the Palace Quarter... there's a reason I ate in the Academy dining hall.

"I had no choice but to eat in one a few times. One of those apple fritters would cost about fifteen bits, except it would have a fancy name, be two thirds the size and only half as nice. I think the difference was made up by a gilt edged plate, the monogrammed cloth napkin, and a lump of ice cream about the size of a strawberry. A small strawberry. Oh, and a staff that acted as if they were doing you a favour by serving you, and add another ten degrees to the tilt of the upraised muzzle because I was clearly a student."

"Fifteen bits?" Applejack exclaimed. "Hooee! That's some mighty expensive fritters."

"This is Canterlot, like Manehatten, everything's more expensive." said Twilight.

"I can pay the higher price..." Luna said.

Applejack shook her hand. "Nope, we have a deal, and I'm not gonna bump up mah prices just because I can. Three hundred bits may not be enough to buy a new plough, but it's more than enough to get our old one fixed up like new. So I've got two out of those three things you were talking about, sugar-cube. To be honest, even if I'd sold everything I had, a hip operation for Granny Smith'd cost more."

"If only there was a way for your farm to earn enough money for that too... I know you wouldn't simply accept the money, even if we could raise it." Twilight mused.

"That's right, and Granny Smith'd box mah ears even if I did." Applejack replied. "Rightly too. It'd cost at least ten times what I made here, and accepting that kinda gift... it was bad enough we had to take a loan out to fix the barn. We'll get by."

"Why not just come up to Canterlot and sell more apples?" Rainbow Dash asked. "They must get through a lot of 'em around here."

"Did look into it, but it ain't that simple. Y'see..." Applejack paused, "Or maybe you don't. Market vendors here in Canterlot need permits and such. Add travel time coming up here, and finding a good spot... It works out I barely make any more than I would in Ponyville. Besides, selling of the cart isn't where most of the day-in day-out money is made. That's generally for luxuries, and saving up against a rainy day."

Seeing they didn't understand, she explained further.

"We got about sixty acres planted with apple trees, and about twenty or so we use for other crops, mostly grain. That's about all me and Mac can buck. Granny Smith can't help out much, and I ain't going to ask Apple Bloom to take on more chores than she does. Filly needs to be in school, and have time with her friends.

"We sell wholesale to all of the places in Ponyville, and I've got contracts for to supply cafés and grocers in Hoofingdon and Trottingham. That accounts for most of our apple supply. We have to keep some in reserve to cover the contracts in case of accidents or spoilage, but when the contracts are filled, it's them apples we sell off of the cart, and make into other apple products. It's extra money on top of our main business."

"You don't sell any of your crop in Canterlot?" asked Twilight, puzzled.

"I'd love to, but I had to work through wholesalers. They were only offering sixteen bits on the bushel, and I sell for a minimum of twenty. Besides, with our existing contracts, we'd have to expand the farm, and we don't have the money or the pony power to manage it afterwards. Sure, the bumper crops we had this year mean I could fill a couple of big orders, but we can't count on that keeping happening, even with the best weather control and growing seasons." She gave a nod to Rainbow Dash and Princess Celestia as she added the last bit.

There'd been a surprised whinny from Pony Joe as Applejack had stated her prices, and Twilight looked over at him. "You found that surprising?"

"Yep. They ain't passing those prices onto their customers. I don't use many apples myself, but a lot of my friends in the food business do, and they were complaining how the price had just gone up another 2 bits to 34 on the bushel. The fancy restaurants can handle it, heck they pay extra for first pick, but a lot of the regular places are taking a hit. If you have apples to spare, I know quite a few ponies who'd be interested."

"Do you have any idea how many bushels that might come to?" Twilight was frowning in thought as Joe gave some numbers. "And how many bushels per acre does the farm produce on average?" Applejack gave her own figures.

"Including getting Granny Smith's hip fixed, what kind of money would we be talking about to expand apple growing acres on the farm, by that much, Applejack?"

"Sugar-cube, there ain't no way you could raise that kinda money, we're talking twelve thousand bits easy, plus hiring an extra farm-hand. I can't go to the bank for another loan, not while I'm still paying off the barn. And how does fixing up Granny Smith fit in with expanding the farm?"

Twilight had a pen scribbling on the notepad, and had conjured an abacus that floated in the air beside her, clicking away merrily. "If my calculations are correct... yes, this could work! If she had a new hip, she could do some of the light jobs around the farm, letting you and Big Macintosh do more heavy work. That is unless she doesn't want to."

"Sure she does. I know for a fact it rails at her that she can't help out more." Applejack's eyes widened. "Maybe we could get along with part-time hires in that case... just for when the big things like apple-bucking season come around."

Then she looked crest-fallen. "But without the money, it's all just hooey."

"Darling, you don't need to go to the bank, not for all of it. I can loan you six thousand, at least." Rarity spoke up. "Hoity Toity and Sapphire Shores pay well for my work. I may have to have reduce my spa sessions to once every other week, but I can manage. And before you say anything, it's an investment, not a gift. We're both business ponies, I'm sure we can arrange something, maybe a corporation so there can be other investors..."

"I have almost a thousand saved up." Twilight said. "I haven't needed anything much past food money this last year, what with living in the library, and I wanted to replace my telescope with the new Decetrig Multi-Parallax 3000. But this is a better use for it."

"I can match that." Rainbow Dash added. "My Weather Control job is a pretty sweet deal. I built my own house, and I don't have any expensive hobbies. Give me an open sky and flying room and that's all really I need!"

Fluttershy hung her head. "I'm afraid I spend most of my money on healing sick animals, but I have some friends who could help with the digging if you were to give them any windfall apples, one's you can't sell. If that was alright with you, I mean..."

Rarity nodded. "And with two thirds of the money already pledged, I'm sure I can interest some other business ponies in Ponyville. After all, we're betting on the Apple family's ability to work hard and grow apples. A pretty safe bet."

"Ohhh! I want to help too, but I don't have..." Suddenly Pinkie Pie's eyes widened as a thought struck her, and she giggled. "Dash, I think we need to plan..."

Applejack looked around the table, tears in her eyes. "You'd all do that for me?"

"In a heartbeat!" "Of course!" "Sure would!"

Luna had watched this, and glanced over at her sister. "I can't help out with money, much as I'd like to. The Royal family doesn't get involved in business, for very good reasons. But I'm sure we could grant you the 'By Royal Appointment.' to help smooth the way, if you can provide more of your baked goods for the two of us. I can also find out if the Palace is being over-charged by their supplier."

"By Royal Appointment?" Rarity gasped. "Oh Applejack, that would be fantastic. Do you know how rare that is?"

Applejack sniffled, and wiped a foreleg across her eyes. "I can guess from the way you acted. Right, then we'll do this! It'll be a lot of hard work, but like you said, hard work and growing apples is what me and mah kin are best at."

Dash and Pinkie had been talking quietly, and giggling to themselves the whole time, and finally came up for air.

"We have a way to help you out, and Rarity too, and pull a prank on a great big meany-horn, all at the same time." Pinkie Pie exclaimed.

"Best prank ever, you mean!" called out Dash. "We're thinking of calling it, 'How'd you like them apples!' It's... well better to show you!"

They backed up from the table, turned to face each other, and Dash ran a hoof over her mane. "Scene 1, The Throne room. Enter stage left, a unicorn who's ego is far to big for his horn, which is small and inoffensive, unlike him."

Then Pinkie spoke. "My dear Blueblood, thank you for coming."

There was surprise around the table, as Pinkie was doing an almost perfect impression of Princess Celestia. Even her posture had somehow changed, and her frizzy mane was somehow more floaty.

"My not-so-humble pleasure, Princess." Dash's response was more a caricature of a posh unicorn accent. "Do you wish me to help raise the sun? For I need only to stand under it and look in a mirror, and the inflation of my already massive ego will lift it into the sky."

That had most of the table giggling, including Luna. "Yes... That's him."

"No, I have a far more vital task for you, one that only you can do. Your father is Minister of Agriculture, and if you are to ever hold high office yourself, you need to get some experience, 'in the field', so to speak." Pink-Celestia replied. "The palace and Canterlot, will be getting many of it's apples from a farm in Ponyville, Sweet Apple Acres. Your job will be to go there, in person, and see to it that the expansion goes through without a hitch, and that those apples are produced."

"Now hold on an apple-bucking minute!" exclaimed Applejack. "You're gonna send that posing pony to my farm to stick his horn in everything, and tell me what to do?"

"I must agree." Rarity added. "I fail to see the prank, unless it is a rather mean one on Applejack."

"Aww... Let us finish guys!" Dash exclaimed, then went back to imitating Blueblood, badly. "But Princess, that would mean leaving Canterlot, my massive collection of grooming equipment, my full length mirror, oh, and Princess Luna. Poor dear will be totally lost without my help. You really should consider her future..."

Luna's horn was sparking at that.

"There is an excellent spa in Ponyville, and think how impressed all your friends... well, the other courtiers anyway, will be when you inform them you are on a special mission, by my direct request. Luna too will be so pleased to see you travelling so far away... to accomplish your mission."

That calmed the moon princess down as she chuckled, "Well, you're half right."

Blue-Dash was visibly swelling with pride as Pink-Celestia ladled on the flattery. "A spa you say? Very well, I shall do it! I shall go to this 'farm' and see to it that Sweet Apple Acres provides you with only the finest apples, or I'll know the reason why!"

Dash looked away to the audience. "Scene two. Sweet Apple Acres." Looking back, she went back into character as Blueblood. "You must be this Applejack I was told to see. You seem familiar, though I can't see how could ever have met a common farming pony. I am Prince Blueblood, handsomest unicorn in all of Canterlot, neigh, Equestria. While I know the mere sight of my immaculate grooming and toned muscles must make you wish to worship me, we have matters of business to discuss first.

Pinkie had somehow acquired Applejack's hat, and tied her mane back in a straight pony-tail like the other earth pony's. Once again her impersonation of Applejack's voice was so perfect, she had ponies looking back and forth between her and the original.

"Yep, I got a letter from Princess Celestia right here, saying she was sending you to help out. So get those fancy duds off, and come on out to the fields. We've got acres of apple trees to plant, and I'm guessing those muscles must be good for something other than showing off."

"Work? Like a common Earth pony?" Blue-Dash tossed her head, overacting dreadfully, "I will forgive your impertinence this once, but my report to the Princess will not be good if it happens again. You are mistaken, I am here to oversee the work. Now have someone fetch my bags."

"It is you who are mistaken, young Skywalker, about a great many things." Pinky Pie replied, making her voice deep and creaky, pulling the hat forward to shade her face, and everyone, even the two princesses felt a chill go down their spines.

"Uh... Pinkie, you know the guy's called Blueblood, right?" Dash looked confused. "Skywalker sounds more like a pegasus name than anything."

Pinkie looked confused for a minute. "I just thought it sounded right somehow..."

Dash shook her head. "Pinkie, you are so random!"

The pink pony bounced back. "Okey-dokie-lokey, I was Applejack, and you'd just asked me to fetch your bags."

As Apple-Pie, she pulled the hat back into place and said. "That ain't what the Princess said in her letter to me, sugar-cube. Reckon you should take a look at it yerself before you get up on yer high horse." She held out a napkin in her teeth, then dropped it, but Dash was looking at it as if it was still there. Pinkie Pie went back to Princess Celestia's voice.

"Dear Blueblood, if you are reading this message, you have met Miss Applejack, the proprietor of Sweet Apple Acres. I believe you may have met her before, at the Gala..."

"Aagh! That's it,you were selling that fatty carnival food!" Blue-Dash waved a hoof at her frantically.

"Please don't interrupt my letter, and be politer to Miss Applejack. As I was saying. She is highly knowledgeable about both the growing and cooking of apples, so please do not argue with her. I trust her implicitly. I believe the best possible place for you to begin your field training is in her fields. You will follow her requests as if I was giving them, and assist her to the best of your ability.

"While I'm sure you aren't familiar with manual work, but I trust Applejack and her family to teach you. I believe that experience broadens the mind. It will undoubtedly help you when you ultimately begin work in your father's department to understand the work you're directing. Of course, I would not ask you to do something you truly did not want to..."

Blue-Dash raised a hoof and pulled it down in a 'Yes!' gesture.

"... and if you wish to return to Canterlot, I'm sure no-one will say anything invidious about the fact that you abandoned the mission you were sent on five minutes after you started, being humiliated in front of your peers and made a laughing stock of the entire court..."

"I get it, I get it!" Blue-Dash said, wincing.

"Then the next thing you can get is your own bags, and then we can get to work, in the fields." Apple-pie responded.

"In the fields? with the dirt? My mane, my coat, my pedicure... Nooo!" Blue-Dash went to her knees, head up in a classic pose of despair,then got up, grinning at the audience. "You get the basic idea. He eats what he's given, sleeps where he's told, and won't have much time for a spa treatment, or much point, since he'll be going straight back to the fields.

"And when he's worked a few weeks helping Applejack, she offers him a chance to help out a friend for an afternoon in a job where he only has to stand around and look pretty. He'll jump at the chance! I'm sure Rarity will need a male ponyquin for something..."

"Blueblood? A field hand? Wouldn't it be kinder just to give him a blindfold and last stick of rubarb and pie him right away?" Luna asked, trying and failing to hold in her snickering.

"Genius!" Rarity was giggling away. "Absolute genius! Especially the chance to use him as a ponyquin. Being a clothes-horse is probably all he's good for."

Dash finished off. "Applejack gets her extra help, Blueblood gets some lessons in hard work and that looking pretty and sneering at people doesn't always work."

"Hmm..." Celestia started, and the levity around the table stopped. She was trying to avoid laughing herself, they had picked a perfect solution to several problems, more than they knew. But time to add her own finishing touches. "You seem very certain that I will go along with this prank. It does seem a bit excessive, even if Blueblood has a number of problems with manners and his actions around other ponies."

"I... we just sort of..." Dash looked abashed.

"Very well, I will assist in this, but I would ask both you Applejack and Rarity too, to not mistreat him, simply because of the way he acted. Very few ponies are utterly irredeemable. I would remind you Applejack that even the smelliest fertiliser can have a seed under it that can grow into a fine plant, if you are willing to nurture it. And Rarity, I'm sure you have found gems of great worth inside rocks that looked worthless."

"I won't go easy on him, but I ain't going to expect anything more of him than I would another green farm-hand." Applejack said, retrieving her hat from Pinkie Pie. "I'll do my best to see that he learns some better manners, though it might take a couple of hard lessons first."

Rarity added her own comment. "If Applejack teaches him manners, I can teach him etiquette. I'm sure every one has good in them somewhere. Even though in this case, I may have to arrange an extended mining expedition. "

That got a few chuckles.

Celestia nodded, pleased with the outcome. As Rainbow Dash had said, Blueblood should learn some valuable lessons from these ponies, and it would help Applejack with her expansion project. What they probably didn't realise was that if Blueblood could be taught to be a better pony, then maybe Rarity might find a Prince Charming after all.

Authors Notes: Okay, this one was interesting. I hope people don't think I'm going to overboard on Applejack's reward, but I felt that out of all the mane cast, she was the one going for the most selfless reasons, and she had the worst disappointment. I know nothing about farming, though I did some research, so any errors I may have made are honest mistakes.

I also managed to put in a measure of revenge on Blueblood. I've been planning this since I first came up with the idea. It's a perfect case of poetic justice, combined with exactly the sort of moral lesson the show gives. It's only a harsh punishment because Blueblood is such a complete prat. If he can learn not to be, it won't be.

I probably won't write the obvious spin-off, one of the reasons I did it as a playlet. I leave it open for other authors to play with. I still have the last part of this, and several other stories I want to do. Hope people enjoyed it.

One part and three ponies to go! See you all soon!