The Bionicle Mare

by ROBCakeran53

Chapter 1: With a Capitol B.

Author's Notes:

It should also be said, when changing said tie rods (that this fic helped pay for said parts, I did the labor), I got punched in the face when my wrench slipped... so yeah, this fic in a weird sorta way bruised my cheek.

Summertime in Ponyville was a lot different than summertime in any other city or town Jacob had been to over the years. For one thing, the quietness of the little village was hard to get used to, having grown up in a city, then living in Canterlot for some time with the occasional visits to Manehattan and Fillydelphia. Number two was the leadership. Although Mayor Mare “ran” the little village, Princess Twilight Sparkle micro-managed most of the happenings, legal or not, and after years of this it got too much for the studious alicorn to handle on her own.

And by “her own” it was actually not just herself, but also her assistant Spike, and her protege Starlight Glimmer. Jacob could remember times when he’d need to ask for help, and Twilight was off somewhere doing some world-saving or solving a friendship problem, so he’d need to go to someone else. Spike was good at helping guide him to finding his answer in a book or a local pony. Starlight… well, she really liked kites?

When he heard Twilight was looking for a secretary, he’d never been so thankful for his thankless job back on Earth.

Before meeting Spitfire, he’d been sort of absorbed into Starlight’s little group of “misfits” as she called them. Herself, Trixie Lulamoon, Maud Pie, and occasionally a stallion named Starburst.

“Mhm. Those were good times,” Jacob mused, sitting on his front porch swing.

Though small, the two story house nestled into the southeast corner of Daffodil Street and Melody Lane was that of his personal dreams. There was a good twenty feet from his neighbors wall to his own, there was enough grass that cutting with his reel mower was a good workout, but not enough to wear him out. Although it had no real backyard (save for a little brick patio, barely enough room for a grill if Equestria had propane grills) the front yard was big, open, and he had a single maple tree that—were he younger—he’d have a tire swing on.

The local mail pony, Derpy Hooves, waved as she deposited his mail into his box. He waved back.

“Good morning Jacob! Is Spitfire coming today?”

Jacob nodded his head, taking a sip of his lemonade. He’d offer her a glass, but already knew the mare prefered soda drinks. She liked the bubbles.

Derpy picked a small brown box out of her saddlebags, and jumped into the air, gliding towards him with her wings outstretched.

Jacob got up to meet her at the steps.

“Also, this came for you.” Derpy shook the box, making it rattle. “Although, I fear you’ll be sending it back. It sounds like it’s in a million pieces.”

Jacob took the box, rubbing his chin with his other hand. What was I expecting? Oh… right!

“Thanks Derpy. And no, that’s how it’s supposed to be, thank you!” Jacob patted Derpy on the poof of her golden mane, making the mare smile.

Derpy saluted, then with another flap of her wings was off into the air once more, bumping into one of the high branches of his maple tree before gaining proper flight.

Watching her go, and still looking up at the nothing in the blue sky, Jacob moved the box from hand to hand, hearing the contents rattling inside.

“Spitfire’s gonna love this.”


If the shouting in her office was any indication, Spitfire was having a bad day. While her yelling could be fun at times, being on the receiving end was not, and after her many promotions over the years and her official rank, it was demoralizing, demeaning, degrading, and de-whatever else she could think of.

When all was said and done, Spitfire found herself on a “forced” leave of absence for the next week. Once the Commander in Air had left her office, another pony had sneaked in before the door could shut.

“I’m sorry, Spits,” Soarin’ said, his ears down.

Spitfire waved him off. “It’s done with and over now. I’m on leave for the next week.”

Soarin’ stomped a hoof. “It’s still not right though! How were you supposed to know of the change in plan? The message got lost and-”

“And I should have known something was different when both Princess Celestia and Luna were there, and not just Luna. She gets it, Celestia… not so much.”

“Still, we’re all just as responsible as you. Shouldn’t we all—”

“Oh, you all are, just I’m the captain, so I’m in the biggest of trouble. You lot are gonna be getting a temporary replacement.”

“Oh no, don’t tell me…”

Spitfire nodded her head. “He’s insistent that he can ‘shape up you lot’ better than me. He’s been spewing that garbage for years, and finally thinks he can out train me.”

Soarin’ raspberried. “Oh yeah, right. He can’t teach a dog to fetch.”

“There’s not much I can do, Soarin’. When the CIA wants something, he gets it. With justifiable cause, of course.”

“And a stunt gone wrong was justifiable cause?”

“When the princesses are involved? Yes.” Spitfire brushed her mane back with a hoof. “To be fair, Soar, since Crash joined, we’ve had a lot more… unusual situations arise than before.”

“That’s true.” There was silence between the two for several seconds. “So, uh, now what?”

Spitfire took off her blue uniform jacket, placing it on her coat rack. “Now, you’re gonna go take a shower and then inform everypony else of what the plans are for drills come Monday.”

“What about you?”

Spitfire put on her worn brown bomber jacket. “I had plans this weekend, and now they’ve been extended. I’m gonna make the best of it.” Spitfire forced a smile.

“Spending time with the B-F?” Soarin’ grinned mischievously.

“And how. I wasn’t able to make it the last two weeks due to training for, well you know.”

“Well, at least you’ll be having a good time to make up for the bad.”

Spitfire trotted past her second in command, patting his shoulder with her wing. “Oh chin up, Clipper. You’ll be fine. Just remember what I told you.”

“Just follow what he does with minimal effort, then once he’s gone go back to our usual routine.”

“Good boy.”

With that, Spitfire walked out of her office, down the hall, and out into the fresh open air of Cloudsdale. With a deep breath, she jumped into the air and began doing what she did best: fly.

As much as she wanted to enjoy the flight to Ponyville, the day’s incident still stuck in her mind. Her frown would be masked away when she passed by another pony—especially if it was a Wonderbolt—but would be right back once she was on her own.

Before long, she was alone in the skies, riding thermals as much as she could, and having to fly against a jet stream once in a while. She eagerly awaited winter time, when Cloudsdale was hovering closer to Ponyville, then she’d just go to Jacob’s every night rather than just on weekends. She was looking forward to the two of them snuggling together at his fireplace, ignoring the snowing and blowing outside.

It was thoughts like those that helped her mood in the worst of times. This wasn’t the worst mood she’d been in, but it still stunk, and thinking of Jacob did wonders to battle off her self-doubts.

A couple hours later, the little village she was aiming for came into view, nestled between some hills and farmland. Okay, lots of farmland on hills. How all those apple trees grew straight on such angles puzzled the mare, but farming wasn’t her thing so she didn’t dwell on it too much.

Do any earth ponies ever look up at me flying and think the same thing, only reversed?

Within moments, she was flying over the village proper, houses and businesses going by under her, until she found the familiar little cluster of houses around Jacob’s. She could never remember the street names, but his house had the only south facing chimney, so she could quickly spot it above all the thatched roofs.

If only Ponyville wasn’t so ground bound.

Then again, Jacob was stuck on the ground all the time, and try as Princess Twilight might, she couldn’t get the cloudwalking spell to work on him very well.

His shoes, yes, but not the rest of him. A shiver went down Spitfire’s spine, remembering how if his shoes hadn’t been tied so tightly, he would have been gone. Hanging upside down through a cloud was an amusing thing after the fact, but at the time she’d legitimately thought she’d lost him.

That was when she knew, too, that she was stuck to him, and wouldn’t let him go for anything in Equestria.

Centering on his house, she began flying circles, seeking her prey. If he didn’t show soon, then she’d look for a open window. Usually when he knew she was on her way, he’d leave one open for her to fly in and “surprise” him.

After her twenty-fifth revolution, she’d cooled down enough to go in for a landing. There was still no sign of him, so she went into a steep dive right for his upstairs bedroom window. As she’d predicted, it was open plenty wide for a pony of her size to glide into without smacking her wings on the sides.

Swiveling her wings to bleed off her speed, she gently glided through the open window and touched down on his bedroom floor, all four hooves at once. Taking a big whiff, his scents overwhelmed the room, while her own could only be picked out when she was closer to the bed.

She gave the bed a silly smile. It was all made up nice and neat, like he did every morning, until she was there, then it became a mess. On more than one occasion she’d made a nest out of his comforter. Sour moods and going to sleep grumpy tended to make her do that; she could never figure out why.

She removed her jacket, draping it over his vanity chair, and gave herself a look over in his mirror. Her mane was a mess, but that tended to come with the territory. Her tail had had enough time to dry from relieving herself mid-flight, and a quick whiff told her it smelled okay. Her coat was covered in a decent lather, and she considered taking a shower, but her lazy side was showing, so instead she turned around to face the bed.

With a mighty flap, she launched herself into the air, and landed with a plop on Jacob’s bed, bouncing slightly and sending one of the pillows over the bed’s edge.


Jacob had heard the clop of hooves overhead as he flipped another blueberry pancake. While not a professional cook by any means, he could make most of the simple foods, mostly breakfast foods.

In fact, Spitfire would occasionally jab at him over his love of breakfast items throughout the day. Eggs, hash browns, pancakes and waffles, cereal, oatmeal… as well as various “breakfast” meats.

He smiled, remembering the times where Spitfire would sneak a strip of his bacon for “experimentation only”.

Placing the fresh pancake on a waiting plate, he took it along with a glass of orange juice and left the kitchen. I wonder how she’d like tacos?

By the time he’d reached his stairs, the recognizable sound of his bed being jumped on echoed through the house.

After walking up, what greeted him in his bedroom was no surprise, and instead a welcome sight.

Spitfire’s ears twitched, swiveling back towards him in the doorway.

Jacob smiled. “And a good afternoon to you, too.”

Spitfire flicked her tail.

“Wow, silent treatment? That bad of a day?” Jacob walked into his bedroom, placing the plate and glass on his night stand.

The mare continued to remain silent, so Jacob sat down beside her and began rubbing her back.

“A mare could get used to this…” she finally mumbled through one of his pillows.

“So could I.”

“I’ll hold you to that, then.” Spitfire finally raised her head, her muzzle lifting into the air as she sniffed around.

“I made you pancakes. Blueberry, your favorite.”

Jacob released his mare, allowing her to sit up and reach for the plate. He set it on the bed next to her, and she dug right in.

“Skip lunch again?”

Spitfire nodded. After a gulp, she took a drink of her orange juice and looked to Jacob.

“So, good news first or bad?”

“Always bad news first.”

“Okay.” She took a breath. “Well, the reason I skipped lunch, and the last two weekends I was going to be here, was for a stunt... that ended up going wrong and I got my flanks chewed out.”

“Oh. Well, that sucks.”

“Your bluntness sometimes is a magical thing,” Spitfire snorted a laugh between bites.

“So what’s the good news?” Jacob asked, rubbing her back.

“I’m on administrative leave for a week, so you’ve got me for that long.” Spitfire took another bite of pancake.

“Hey, that’s not too bad, I hope. Sorry you had to get in trouble just to get to stay with me for a week.”

Spitfire shrugged. “Not like I planned for it or anything.”

“What, deliberately sabotaging a aerial stunt just so you can spend more time with your boyfriend?”

Spitfire stopped chewing. “Technically, aren’t we engaged now?”

Jacob scratched his head, then shrugged. “I mean, I’m not going around and spreading the word or anything, I just assumed we had an agreement on what our plans were.”

Spitfire nodded her head, then began licking the plate clean.

“Wow, worked up quite the appetite. Want me to make more?”

She shook her head, downing the last of her juice. “Naw; if anything I’m ready for a nap.”

At that, Jacob stood up, walking around the bed and picked up the fallen pillow, placing it on his bed. With a jump, he joined the mare, causing her to bounce and flop next to him.

Spitfire rubbed against Jacob’s side, nestling up against him, and let out a content sigh. The human wrapped an arm around her back, hugging her close.

“I got some stuff to do, so you rest, and when you wake up I got a surprise for you.”

Spitfire nodded, then closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.


With a stretch and a yawn, Spitfire woke up wrapped in a cocoon of bed sheets and a single pillow she’d been hugging.

“Urg, again?”

She stood from her impromptu nest, giving it a kick in the vain hopes to mask what it was shaped to be.

Walking out of Jacob’s room, she made a quick pit stop to his upstairs bathroom, then marched downstairs. Spying her human on the couch in the living room, she walked in to join him.

“Good morning, Firehead. You know, your mother’s right; your nesting habits are adorable.”

Spitfire’s ears went flat. “Don’t tell me you two have been talking about that.”

Jacob shrugged. “Well, she likes to visit between your shows, and we’ve got nothing better to do than talk about you behind your back.”

“Gee, thanks. Any other ways to improve my mood, smart ass?”

With a large smile, Jacob reached onto the coffee table for a plain, brown box. “In fact, I do. I got you a little something.”

At Jacob’s expression, Spitfire raised a brow.

“Okay, maybe I got us something, but still, it’ll be fun. They reminded me of when I was a kid—I was obsessed with Legos.”

Spitfire began to open the box, noticing the packaging tape was already sliced open for her convenience. “Legos? What’s that?”

“Plastic interlocking blocks that you could build things with. Mostly they acted like land mines on the floor at night in your bare feet, but still, they were fun.”

Shoving a mass of packaging peanuts out of the box and onto the couch, Spitfire pulled out two identical shaped boxes, the differences being the character portrayed on them.

“What in the wide world of Equestria are these?” Spitfire asked.

“They remind me of another type of Lego, more advanced, called Bionicles. They’re obviously not the same, but still, I thought they could be a fun challenge for us.”

“Ignoring the fact that one is of me, and the other is Daring Do, these are designed for unicorn foals, you know that right?”

“Yeah, but, I have fingers, and you have wings that sometimes act like fingers. I figured between the two of us, we could make a day project out of them!”

“Okay, but it's kinda weird you got one of me.”

“Well that’s mine. Yours is Daring Do. I’d have gotten you one of Soarin’, but they were out. Apparently he’s a hot item.”

“Himself or the toy?”

Jacob shrugged. “Probably both.”

Spitfire shook her head. “He’s such a hopeless romantic.”

“Hey, when it comes to the woman, or mare, that we love, it’s anything but hopeless.”

Spitfire stuck her tongue out and made a gagging noise.

Jacob let out a laugh. “Alright, well what do you say we start on yours first? I’m curious how advanced these really are.”


Sunday mornings were always a pleasant time for Twilight Sparkle, even before she moved to Ponyville or became a princess. There was something about knowing this was the last morning before the hard work week was to start up again made some ponies less than enthusiastic to get up and greet the day.

For Twilight, it just meant she had one more day of freestyle studying before she had to study for school.

Trotting along briskly through the Ponyville streets, Twilight had a goal in mind. While the weekends were a time off, being a princess meant that sometimes her tasks and duties bled into the weekends, and as much as she strived to take on these burdens on her own, there were times when she just had to reach out to complete her task.

Approaching Jacob’s house, she mused to herself at his little white fence that surrounded his property. An odd thing for most ponies, to Jacob it was something part of his American Dream as he so commonly would boast, having acquired his own home.

He did at least leave a clear opening in the front to enter. She’d wondered if he was ever going to install a gate, but he’d told her this way ponies knew they were still welcome. He’d just wanted to set a boundary, and get a chuckle out of his own home world humor.

Her hooves clip-clopped along his stone walkway, and as she marched up the steps she could hear voices through an open window. She hesitated to knock, instead allowing herself a moment to eavesdrop on her employee.

“Look, I’m telling you, it’s too small,” said a mare’s voice Twilight didn’t recognize initially.

“It’s not that small,” came Jacob’s voice.

“Yeah, you’re gonna hurt it or yourself if you force it in.” A fait blush formed on Twilight’s face. She swore she recognized the voice, but couldn’t quite place it.

“Look, I’m gonna shove it in, and hope for the best.”

Twilight shook her head, giving the door a solid knock. With a flick of her tail, she listened to the foot falls approaching, the exchanges she’d heard stuck in the back of her mind. She needed to find a coltfriend…

Jacob opened the door, sporting only a pair of shorts and socks.

“Good morning, Jacob! Hope I’m not intruding on something intimate?” Twilight internally slapped herself at her word choice.

Jacob looked around. “Uh, what time is it?”

From her saddle bags, Twilight pulled out a silver pocket watch. “Why, it’s eight in the morning!”

Jacob rubbed his face. “Oh. Well what can I do for you, Twilight? Also, intimate?”

Twilight rubbed a foreleg. “Ehehe, ignore that. I heard a mare’s voice and I thought—”

“Hey, Jacob, who’s at the door? Tell them we’re busy.”

Jacob turned his head around. “It’s Princess Twilight. You know, my boss?”

“Okay. Tell Her Majesty to go away, we’re busy.”

Jacob shook his head. “Never mind, Twilight. Want to come in? I’m about to make breakfast, if you haven’t eaten yet.”

“I don’t want to intrude…”

“You wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t important on a…. Sunday morning, so come on in. I’ll make breakfast, then you can tell me what’s up.”

Jacob stepped aside, allowing the alicorn to enter. She’d been in his house before, multiple times. She followed him into the living room, where Spitfire sat on the floor in front of the coffee table, small plastic bits strewn around her.

“Good, you’re back. I think if we put this piece here we can- oh.” Spitfire looked up to see Twilight. “Princess, good to see you.”

“Good morning, Spitfire! It’s been a while!” Twilight rushed over to nuzzle the mare, who reluctantly returned the gesture.

“Yeah. What uh, wait, did you say morning?” Spitfire looked to the windows, covered with drapes thick enough to only allow slivers of sunlight in.

“Yeah, we’ve been up all night, go figure? I’m gonna make breakfast. Take a break from those things.” Jacob walked away, grabbing a white t-shirt from the back of the couch and pulling it over his head as he walked.

Twilight took a seat on the floor across from Spitfire, examining the toys and parts covering the table surface. “How have you been, Spitfire?”

The pegasus shrugged, her eyes glancing between the alicorn and the archway leading into the kitchen. “Been better, been worse.”

Twilight nodded. “I see. So, what brings you by Jacob’s? I know he often spends his weekends with his marefriend, so I didn’t think I’d see you here.”

Spitfire blinked, head tilting curiously. “Um, I am his marefriend.”

It was Twilight’s turn to look curious. “You are?”

Spitfire’s mouth dropped open. “What? How? We’ve been dating for over three years!”

Twilight scratched her chin. “Huh, odd how I never connected the dots.”

“Odd is the last word I’d use…” Spitfire mumbled.

“So, why do you have unicorn designed buildable figurines-”


Twilight raised a brow.

“Their technical name is too long and boring, and Jacob had something similar back home called Bionicles, so that’s what we’re calling them.”

“O-kay then, why do you have Bionicles?”

“Jacob thought it would be fun to build them. I was hesitant at first, but now I’m finding them a great challenge and distraction.”

Twilight’s magic picked up the completed one. “This is you, isn’t it?”

Spitfire nodded, a faint blush on her face. “Yeah, I remember signing something a while back for my likeness to be used in toys… I didn’t think it was this kind of toy.”

“I’m impressed! Most non-unicorn ponies struggle to even solve the puzzle, let along putting the pieces together.”

“Well, between Jacob’s nimble fingers and my bullheadedness, we’re getting there.”

Twilight chuckled, placing the Bionicle back down. “I’m hoping his nimble fingers will aid in a problem I’m having.” She then levitated out some papers from her saddle bag.

Spitfire’s ears went flat. “Oh, you’re just here to make him do more work?”

Twilight shook her head. “No no, it’s his time off. I just need him to clarify part of a proposal he amended on my behalf.”

“Hey, you two, food’s about ready!” Jacob called from the kitchen.

Both ponies stood and made their way into the kitchen. The table was already set with plates and utensils, and two seats pulled away so they could jump right up.

Spitfire did just that, taking her seat in his oversized chairs with his oversized table. A human thing she remembered, since they’re so tall. He, thankfully, had most of the chairs made with extra padding so ponies could still sit up at the table.

It didn’t, however, make it any easier to get up on them. Thankfully, she was of the flying variety of pony so with a few flaps of her wings she was seated in her spot.

Twilight forgot for a moment about hers, and tried to climb up. She succeeded; however in the process, she knocked off her cushion. With a quick burst of magic she brought it up and sat on it.

Spitfire tried not to laugh. Rainbow was right, the princess was quite adorkable.

Jacob placed a plate with a half dozen pancakes on it, and returned to the kitchen to make more with the remaining batter.

“Some are chocolate chip, some are blueberry,” Jacob said between bites of his own, preferring to roll his up like a burrito and eat it dry.

As the mares ate, Twilight magicked a piece of paper out of her saddlebags—which she’d left in the foyer—laying it on the table’s surface. Jacob returned with another half dozen pancakes, placing them down, and took a seat himself where Twilight had placed the paper.

“I remember this one. Mayor Mare was having some issues with the Canterlot Nobles on whether or not going through with this, so I dumbed it down for both parties.”

“Yes, but I fear it was too dumbed down, because now Ring Tied is causing a stir in Canterlot, and wants more changes.”

Jacob shaked his head, and began talking government with Twilight. Spitfire happily ignored the two, munching on her amazing pancakes and watching Jacob’s expressions as he talked. She wondered if she ever looked that serious when discussing stunts and performances with the other ‘Bolts…


An hour later, Spitfire was resting her cheek on her hoof, barely listening to Twilight and Jacob talking about some sort of legal jargon she didn’t want to try and understand. If they continued this for any longer, she was going to go crazy.

“So, you think this will suffice for those Canterlot ponies?” Jacob asked.

Twilight gave the sheet of paper another look over, and nodded her head. “Yes, I think so.”

“Good, because if they can’t figure this out, then they’re more useless than I thought.”

Twilight was about to speak when Spitfire saw her opportunity.

“Hey! Speaking of figuring stuff out!”

Both Jacob and Twilight look to Spitfire quizzically.

“SO! Did you know, Twilight didn’t realize we were dating?”

Jacob looked over to Twilight for a moment before looking back at his marefriend.

“Um, I’m not sure what this has to do with anything, but really? You didn’t?”

Twilight shrugged. “I mean, I never saw you two in a intimate setting, so I never connected the dots.”

“Oh, well that makes—” Jacob began.

Spitfire’s forced laughter interrupted her boyfriend. “Aha ha ha, yeah, I mean, we’re practically engaged now and you didn’t even know we were dating. How weird is that?”

Jacob dropped his pen.

Twilight raised a brow.

Spitfire internally slapped herself, then promised to hit Jacob later for boring her to stupidity. Maybe in the bedroom. After they finished those cursed bionicles...

Twilight smiled. “Wow, I hadn’t realized how serious your relationship was, Jacob! You’re engaged? Well, congratulations! Have you decided on a date? Venue? OH! I can help with the planning! And I know Rarity will want to help with the suits and dresses! We could have it at Sweet Apple Acres, and Pinkie and the Cakes could cater! Oh, this will be perfect!”

Jacob opened his mouth to attempt at responding to each of Twilight’s questions, but failed miserably as the princess continued on ignoring him. Twilight gathered up all her corrected paperwork with a single poof of magic, her saddle bags suddenly ready to burst as she stepped down from the table.

“Wait, what? Twilight, hold on!” Jacob also stood, trying to follow the princess.

“I’ll go let everypony know! I’m so happy for you both!” Putting on her saddlebags, Twilight made her way out the door and out into Ponyville.

Jacob tried to catch her, but with a flap of her wings she was gone. The stunned human stood on his porch, watching Twilight turn into a small purple dot and then disappear from sight. Spitfire walked up and stood beside him.

“Good, she’s gone. That could have gone better, but I’m sure it’ll be fine. Now, let's go back to those bionicles,” she marched inside.

Jacob continued to stare at the empty sky. “We are so screwed.”

“After we finish Daring Do, sure,” Spitfire called from inside with a whip of her tail.

In a zombie like trance, Jacob returned inside, closing the front door, and taking a seat on the floor of the living room where Spitfire was picking up where they left off.

“You do realize we’re screwed, right? Once Pinkie finds out-”

Spitfire silenced Jacob with a kiss, then returned to her spot opposite of him on the floor. “Jacob, I had a really bad day yesterday. I want to just let it go, spend time with you, and enjoy my week. Relax, we’ve got at least a whole day to ourselves before anypony else knows anything. Word can’t travel that fast.” At Jacob’s blank stare, she added, “Also, you’re right, these things are really addictive!”

Jacob began to visibly sweat. “This is Ponyville. Nothing escapes the Pink Menace.”

Spitfire raised her head to look at Jacob, but froze herself at what was looking at them through a open blind.

Pinkie Pie, with the largest smile Spitfire had ever seen, was looking at them with a grin wider than she thought physically possible.

The bionicles were momentarily forgotten, instead regret on a scale larger than any sort of verbal abuse she could give or receive flooded her mind.

“You’re right, we are so screwed.”

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