It’s funny really how every one looks at on another and assumes that they are “normal”. That they grew up with a happy-go-lucky family lifestyle and probably don’t suffer from anything at all aside from spilling coffee on their lap or messing up homework.

Bitch, please. I’m about as far from normal as you can get. I think I’ll demonstrate my point with a little story.

My name is Garrett. I’m a twenty four year old mechanical engineer who works for big companies like NASA and Boeing. I design and build all sorts of things from air and space craft to robots. Part of the reason why I’m so successful with my designs is due to my greatest ally and closest (more than you know) friend: Sir Lawrence Ci Ci Fedorable (Actually his name is just Lawrence. He just likes the sound of the extra names)

Damn straight bitches! I gotta get me my props on this crash course you put us through.

(Okay, first off, it wasn’t my fault. How was I supposed to know all this would happen?) You see, when I said “closest”, I meant that Lawrence is my other personality. If you watched Smeagol talk to himself in the Lord of the Rings movies, then you have an idea of what goes on inside my head on a daily basis.

Yeah, except my “Precious” is the three B’s: Bitches, Bombs, and Blowing your mind.

We may seem like complete opposites at times, but we still know how to work together.

Can we just get on with the story already? I’m falling asleep here.

Right, well here goes.

---

So I’m driving down the highway to get to work. I’m probably clocking at about eighty miles per hour but I didn’t care because I’m late for work. As I concentrated on the road, Lawrence sat in the passenger seat rocking out to the songs on the radio. Though he was in my head, I could also see and interact with him using my thoughts and imagination as could he in my situation.

I wanna rock and roll all ni-i-ight

And party every day!

After listening to this for a few times, I decided to mess with him by zipping his mouth shut. Noticing this, he glared at me and unzipped his mouth while I was chuckling softly.

Dude, don’t interrupt me when I’m in the middle of a song. I was on a roll here ya asshole.

I glanced at him and smiled, “Lawrence, you were way off key to the point it was really annoying.” I was a bit OCD when it came to little things like that.

Lawrence smiled back, Could be worse. I could be playing some Three Days Grace right now.

“You know what that music does to your mind.” I deadpanned.

Lawrence just grinned even wider, I know.

We spent the rest of the trip arguing about radio music to the point that when we arrived at work, we were talking about some obscure musical topic.

The building I worked at currently was a government research facility. Tall, grey, square, and surrounded by guards and barbed wire fences. Normally, I hated the government but the only reasons I took this job was because the pay was good, I got to build cool stuff, and blow shit up. I flashed the guard my ID and Lawrence flashed him the middle finger. He does that stuff because no one can see him but me and sometimes it gets quite hilarious.

I parked the car and made some last minute grooming in the rear view mirror. I had a lean face with scattered pimples, brown eyes, a hawk like nose, and chestnut hair. Lawrence had the same features except that he had crimson eyes. I was wearing the standard issue lab coat while he wore jeans and a t-shirt, it was one of the things I envied about him at times.

I stepped out of the car to see Lawrence jumping out the window like the Dukes of Hazzard. Laughing at his antics, I remembered I was late and almost ran into the building. Nodding at the security guard receptionist, I walked to the elevator and swiped my card. After a few seconds, the door opened to reveal a few other occupants. I paid them no mind as I stepped in and pressed a button to go to one of the deeper floors.

I got off on my floor and went through several more security screens (it gets annoying after the first few times) before coming out onto the floor of a special project I got to help with. In the center of the room was the core of a meteorite that landed in the middle of the desert some months ago. Since the government picked it up, we have been conducting countless experiments with it. It’s been said that it gives off a special radiation that could prove more efficient and less dangerous than regular nuclear fission.

What does mechanical engineering have to do with space junk and nukes? I work on a team that builds special devices to control the energy to make it safer to use. Pfft, I’ll believe the radiation is safe when I’m sixty and not having cancer from working here.

Anyways, today was a big day in that the facility was going to try to successfully harness the radiation as an energy source. Dozens of other scientists scurried about in excitement and anxiety for their moment of glory. Stealthy as a ninja, I took up my position as the Igor of the day. Basically, I stood by at the control panel until the other mad scientists pointed at me and yelled ‘PULL THE SWITCH!’ in a dramatic manner. God, I’m such a nerd. Fuck it, I don’t care.

Time passed quickly and soon enough, everybody was in place behind some safety glass. The head of the research team pointed at me and gave me my cue; he even did the dramatic voice as well. What? It was a running gag in the facility. Sue us.

I pulled the switch with much gusto, even throwing in my own evil laugh as well. The entire room lit up as the meteorite core began to glow an ethereal blue. My team and I controlled more levers and buttons and then the glow started to rise out and was directed to a custom made battery pack. The energy meters began to rise slowly but steadily. I could see some of the electrical engineers crack open some bottles of the bubbly even though we weren’t done yet.

Those idiots are just taunting Murphy’s Law. If this goes south, I hope they die first. No, scratch that. I’ll make sure they die first. Lawrence said as he looked through my eyes.

Amen to that, I thought as I gave him a mental brofist. I turned my attention to the monitors to see that the meters were almost full. When they were full, it would be my job to cut the power. I watched the levels make their way to the top like a snail. Once it reached the top and the light turned on, I reset the switch and cut the power. Everyone began to celebrate a job well done. Except me, I don’t celebrate until I see it end. I've watched too many movies and i've been hit by the laws of the universe a few time to know that this is the point when bad things happen

The glow stopped and began to retreat back to the core, but it didn’t go back in. instead the glow formed up and detached itself from the ball. The orb of light began to move away from the core and to the batteries.

Oh shit, I thought. The batteries were already packed and adding more energy would be like adding more pressure to a bursting balloon. Except that bursting balloon could blow a mile wide crater out of this facility. So what do I do? I run for the batteries. Stupid as hell but if it worked then I wouldn’t care. The orb was only about four meters away. I was ten meters. Luckily for me, I did a lot of parkour and running in order to stay fit and be prepared for the zombie apocalypse. Hey, it’s going to happen eventually.

I sprint forward and start running on top of the expensive government equipment. Right now I could hear the others are yelling at me for my actions and others screaming at what I was trying to prevent. The orb was just 2 meters away and I was almost there.

Run Forest, Run! Lawrence yelled at me, trying to make fun of the situation.

The orb was now a meter away and started to snake out towards the battery cells. In a last ditch effort, I leaped forward and pushed the battery cell into a pile of wires nearby. Phew, I thought, that was close.

Famous last words, Lawrence said, now look. He took control of some body movements for me to see the orb was right on top of me!

I put on my best poker face and said, “Well, fuck.”

The orb engulfed me and I saw nothing but white.

---

All I could feel was the light tossing me (or at least my particles) around in empty space. Sometimes it felt like I was almost being chewed up and tossed around like a dog toy. I could feel myself being torn apart and put back together like i was play-doh. In short, it hurt like fuck. I don’t know how long it took but finally a tear appeared in the light and I mustered together all my particles and dove through it as soon as I could.

Unfortunately, the ground I landed on was sloped and I began to tumble my way down the hill swearing like a sailor all the way down to the bottom. The last thing I saw before losing consciousness was a large tree coming at my face.