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Hey, Where's the Cream Filling

by Pacce

Chapter 1: Now That's the Stuff


Pinkie Pie was busy restocking the display counter at Sugar Cube Corner when the shop's door bell jangled. "Hello custie-customer," Pinkie sang out as she put the last muffin in it's place. "What can I help you fill your tum-tum-tummy with today," she asked turning around. What she saw caused her to dive behind the counter, leaving the muffin pan twirling in her wake. "You," she cried out. "You're here to finish me off once and for all! SOMEPONY CALL THE POLICE!"

Gilda leapt across the shop and clamped a clawed hand over Pinkie's struggling mouth. "I came here to apologize, you little dweeb," Gilda hissed through her clenched beak. Seeing herself reflected in Pinkie's terrified eyes, Gilda looked embarrassed and took her hand away. "I'm sorry," she said almost sheepishly. "I tend to, uh, overreact sometimes."

"That's okay," Pinkie said, all smiles once again. "I've been told that I overreact all the time!"

Gilda arched an eyebrow at Pinkie in bewilderment. "Right. Anyway, like I said, I came here to apologize." Gilda walked around the shop looking anywhere, but at Pinkie. "I've had lots of time to think about how I acted and I know that I was being a kind of a jerk."

"Toooooootally a jerk!" Pinkie offered up, helpfully.

Gilda shot a glare at Pinkie that could have set her mane on fire. "Yeah, well, you were a little Miss Buttinski all morning, ya know," Gilda shouted as she stormed back behind the counter. "I tried to be polite about it then, just like I'm trying now and you still refuse to take any sort of hint."

Pinkie's head cocked to the side, "This isn't a very good apology. Usually, when someone apologizes, they talk about all the things they did wrong and how bad they feel and how much they want to make it up and,"

"Do you EVER shut up," Gilda roared into Pinkie's face.

Unfazed, Pinkie cocked her head to the other side, "Sometimes when I'm sleeping." Thinking it over, she then added, "Or if I'm having something really yummy!"

Shaking, Gilda put a clawed hand on Pinkie's shoulder and pushed her against the wall. "Well, eat this," she shouted and shoved her beak over Pinkie's mouth.

Pinkie's eyes went wide with surprise and her forehooves flailed in the air. After a few moments, Pinkie's eyes slid half closed and her hooves came to a rest on Gilda's back. After what felt like hours, Gila pulled away from Pinkie with a gasp. "So, uh, let that be a lesson to you," she said between breaths.

'Well, I don't know where that came from.' Gilda thought looking at the apparently paralyzed pony, 'But it seems to have quieted her down'.

Pinkie remained standing with her back to the wall, her eyes glazed, and slightly dribbling from her mouth. Gilda began stammering as her heart refused to stop racing, "So, yeah, now you're apologized to." Gilda then cleared her throat. "You know where I can find Dash? I got some things I need to say to her."

Pinkie blinked her eyes once. Then her eyes sprang fully open and she fell back on all fours and shook her head before shouting excitedly, "Oh Celestia!" Gilda backed up against the counter as Pinkie approached. "So THAT'S why you wanted to be alone with Rainbow Dash!"

"What?!"

"I mean really, I'm not dense, if you had just said you needed to be alone for that, I would have totally totally backed off!" Gilda found herself half way on the counter as Pinkie kept pressing forward. "Pinkie Pie's no hater, I know the score! All you had to was give me a little nudge nudge, wink wink and I would have been out of your hair/feather combination!" Pinkie had now clamped her hooves on the counter, trapping Gilda. "Although now I AM a little jealous. You were just going to town in here," Pinkie said pointing a hoof at her mouth and leaning in. "I've been told that I have a crazy tongue, but I'll bet you could empty out a cream filled pastry and leave the dough intact!"

"Excuse me," They both looked up to see Derpy Hooves standing in the doorway. "Do you have any fresh muffins," she asked with a smile.

Gilda grabbed the edges of the counter and pulled herself back, sliding out from underneath Pinkie. She then began shoving Derpy out the door, "Sorry, store's closed, come back again anytime!" Gilda then slammed the door, locked it, and turned the sign in the window to say "Closed, baking in progress."

She then turned back to Pinkie, glowering. "Now I'm REALLY going to have to shut you up!" Gilda stomped forward as Pinkie just smiled, her tail shaking excitedly.

* * * * * * * * * * *

In the skies above Ponyville, Rainbow Dash was flying in circles with a heart shaped box of candy tied to her tail while talking to herself. “So Pinkie, I bought this box of candy, but I guess I wasn’t thinking since I don’t actually like any of these. I was just going to throw it out when I noticed that these are your favorites, so I figure you might as well have them." Dash nodded to herself, “That’s perfect, I’ll go with that!”

Flying to the shop, Dash saw the temporally closed sign in the window and circled to the back door. She swallowed hard, clenched her teeth, and pushed open the door. “PINKIE, I GOT YOU SOME CANDY, BUT I DON’T LIKE YOU,” Dash shouted with her eyes closed. Hearing no response, she cautiously opened one eye. Both eyes immediately flew open, but no matter how hard she stared, her mind couldn’t piece it all together.

“This isn’t what it looks like,” Gilda said, pushing Pinkie’s tail away from her face.

“Well, that depends,” Pinkie said scratching her chin. “If it looks like me and Gilda-” Pinkie was cut off by Gilda clamping a hand over Pinkie’s mouth which Pinkie immediately began to nibble, causing Gilda to squirm.

‘Well,’ Rainbow’s shattered mind thought. ‘This isn’t how I expected my old friends to treat my new friends either.’

“Dash,” Gilda said with shame in her eyes. “I never meant for any of this.”

Rainbow’s face was without emotion as the slipped the box of candy off her tail and sat it on the counter. She then took in a deep breath, “You know, the Cake’s are going to run us out of town when they see what we’ve done to their kitchen.”

“We?” Gilda and Pinkie said together.

We,” Rainbow Dash said with a devious smile.

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