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Equestria In My Sock

by Lamia

Chapter 1: Out Of This World


So here I am, laying on my couch, watching the tube, being unconstructive as usual. I feel like I should do something a little more substantial, but I really just wanna lay around the house. Reaching into my small bag of beef jerky, I pull out a good piece, biting down with my sharp teeth and tearing off a chewable bit. I zip the bag closed and scroll through all of the channels on the remote, but there's seriously nothing on. Even with all the thousands of channels we have, there's never anything. Sighing, I turn off the TV and lay sprawled on my back across the couch for a while. My bushy tail dangles over the edge, and I sway it to and fro to help me relax.

Seems to be a calm day, not too noisy outside, for once. The dull hum of our mechanical house is soothing as always, almost enough to make me fall asleep, but I just took a nap an hour ago. Looking at the metal band on my wrist, I tap a couple buttons on it to bring up the time, checking it. Looks like afternoon. I flick my pink locks out of my face and close my eyes to rest a bit, trying to think of what else I can do to pass the time.

"Lamia!" My older sister is calling me, but I don't feel like getting up, so I try to block out her voice. "Lamia! Lamiaaaaa!" I can hear her walk into the room; now she's right next to the couch. I still don't feel like getting up. Her breath grazes my ear, causing me to involuntarily twitch it.

"Lamia, Lamia, Lamia, Lamia, Lamia, Lamia, Lamia--"

"ALRIGHT!" I shout, getting up on my elbows and glaring over at my light-blue sister. "What is it, Lapis!?" Taking another piece of beef jerky from the bag, I start munching on it while I prepare to hear another long-winded explanation of sciencey stuff or whatever.

"Lamia do laundry!" she says, pointing at me with her right paw and glaring at me annoyed, her ears pointing down. "All dirty, all week!" I sigh and give her a defeated face. She's going to bug me until I do it, to the point where I won't get any sleep. I figure I may as well do what she asks, since I need something to do, at least for right now.

"Fine," I conceded. Lapis smiles and runs off on all four of her stubby limbs, no doubt eager to get back to another crazy experiment. Arching my back upward and stretching out, I collapse for a moment before rolling off the couch and hitting the carpet with a shaky thud that travels through the room. I get up and take my beef jerky with me, walking into the hall behind the couch. I still really need to get some decoration around here; the walls and ceiling being pure white is boring. It needs eye candy.

I decided to walk a little while as I snack, down the upper hall, taking a left, going down a flight of stairs, turning right, then left, under the pipe, across the glass box, and finally straight to the laundry room. Instead, I'm going to get a drink, first. Turning to the kitchen from the hall, I open up the fridge and take out a grape soda. Sticking my beef jerky into my skirt's pocket for later, I pop the can open and start the hike.

I walk a little while as I drink, down the upper hall, taking a left, going down a flight of stairs, turning right, then left, under the pipe, across the glass box, and finally straight to the laundry room. Tossing the now-empty can into a bin, I look at the small pile of clothes of me and my sisters: Lapis's giant white sweaters, Lauir's one-pieces, my wife beaters and purple skirts and socks. When I think about it, all three of us like to wear white. Wonder why that is.

Stepping over to the washer, I hop on top of it and open the lid. Replacing the fur filter covered in strands of our magenta, light blue, and yellow hair, I hop off and prepare some magic. Taking a rooted stance, I stomp on the ground once and force the pile of clothes up and over into the wash. A few articles of clothing fell on the ground, so I begin tossing the rest in.

As I pick up one of my purple socks, I notice a strange glow coming from the open end. Turning it around, I peer inside and notice I'm looking at a really bright place; it's a kind of town from a bird's-eye view. I can see ferals, four-legged furs walking around, but they don't look like any species I've--

Oh, great. An optically-activated pandimensional portal in my damn sock. Before I can react, I'm being sucked into the sock and travelling through a wormhole. I sigh to myself as I feel the dimensions compress and contort me, sending me to whatever place I was just looking at. I really should have gotten a warning from the house that there was one; I'll have to check on a couple things whenever I get back. Hopefully I can, anyway. My mother-figure will eventually find I'm not on our home planet and will be forced to scan. At least being in another reality could give me something to do.

I find myself hitting the ground right on my ass. Ow... I get up and rub the pain away, looking around to see what kind of place I ended up. It's bright here. Like, really bright. Not just because of the sunlight, but the trees, the buildings, even the people are bright. My eyes are burning. I take a moment to rub them. Opening my eyes again, it's still just as blinding.

"Hi!" A perky voice comes from behind, causing me to spin around. There's a really pink thing in front of me; she has poofy hair, four legs that look like noodles, bright colors that burn my corneas, and giant globes for eyes that have about a hundred reflections in them. "I've never seen you before! I'm Pinkie Pie! What's your name?" Her voice is high-pitched and squeaky and grates at my sensitive cat ears. Good thing the translator installed on my wristband was working, though now I know to write a program for lowering pitch. It's odd that she didn't take note of my appearance, though; furries must be an active race on this planet. I stare at her beaming face, our height being about the same.

"Lamia," I say calmly, covering my ears. Uninterested in talking with that loud pink resident, I turn to walk off as she continues talking to noone in particular, not noticing that I'm no longer there. The road appears to be pretty hard; my paws are seriously gonna be sore at this rate.

Stopping before entering into the town nearby, I take a good look from the side of the road. I can see some people from here, deeper into the town; from what I can tell, they have fur, and also hooves for feet. A type of ungulate, apparently. Makes sense now why there's nobody wearing shoes. Their hair and tails also seem to have different patterns and colors than their fur, which is expected, but some styles are just really strange. No doubt dying hair is popular in this society, too.

I guess there's nothing else to do while I wait for rescue but to take a look around on this new planet. Walking into town, I draw a few odd looks, but they more or less pass me by. Guess I was right about there being furs here common enough to not give too much notice.

As I keep going through the town, I overhear some conversation using the word 'pony' as part of various pronouns and such. So they're horses. A village, maybe even planet filled with a bright rainbow of multicolored horses, nice ones, even. There were compliments all over the place, good tidings, happiness, love, and excitement. I felt a bit sick; this is like culture shock to me or something, considering how crappy people are back on Akane.

"Hello, there!" a random denizen says to me as I pass by. Are you visiting Ponyville?" I glance back; she appears to have light purple fur and a horn, along with pretty straight and well-kept hair. Unicorns must be a species variant; that means it's possible there are other types of horses here, too.

"Yep," I say without breaking stride, looking forward again and continuing on. More and more of these colorful ponies say hello to try and strike conversation, but honestly I wish they'd leave me alone. It's better for me to learn about where I'm at by myself, and I really can't adjust to their profound niceness right away.

Something I'm noticing is that nearly each pony I see has some kind of brand on their hips, both sides. The younger cubs mostly don't have one. Wonder if it's some kind of rite of passage or something, getting a fur tattoo here. I know that I'm not going to be getting one, but I doubt anyone would be able to tell I'm only just a couple years old, either. Still, I best try and avoid any tattoo parlors.

Up ahead, I can see a crowd of them gathering around another who seems to be boasting about how awesome they are. Oddly, this one appears to have a rainbow in their hair. Strong-spoken and self-confident she is, which makes me smile to myself; she's pretty hot. I continue walking, exploring more of the town.

Was it just me, or did the sky turn pink for some reason? The atmosphere here must be different, although I'm not noticing any change in my breathing. Well, whatever. Looking ahead, I can see a shady tree from here outside the town with my name on it. Picking up the pace a little more briskly, I come to it and plop down at the base, sighing at the chance to relax.

As I glance around, I see that the locals are gazing up at the sky, too. Maybe it's not supposed to be pink. I crawl from my spot to peer up from out of the shade. ...Clouds, I imagine, aren't supposed to be pink, either. It begins raining all of a sudden from the multitude of clouds, but it's dark rain. I scoot back into the shade to be protected from it, mostly. I can see that it's brown, and smells-- Is this chocolate? Taking a taste, I verify it: It's chocolate. This place was getting interesting, fast.

Ponies are confused all over as the sugary condiment covers hair, trees, buildings, even the ice cream stand nearby. I can't imagine the sticky mess will be easy to clean up. Not being much a fan of chocolate, I try to repel the rain with some simple magic; it seems to work, for now, as it simply bounces off. That in itself is strange 'cause it's supposed to splatter. I shrug and watch as the town begins getting affected more by the weirdness.

A couple houses melt before the roofs change into books that flap away using their pages as wings. More clouds start transforming, turning into gigantic feathers and raining down grapefruits. Even the people start morphing into different things such as drinking glasses, eyeglasses, and stained glasses. Well, this is pretty weird. Taking my bag of beef jerky out of my pocket, I take a piece with one of my tentacles and toss it into my beak, chewing horizontally with my rows of ice cube teeth; this is definitely a strange sensation. Wonder if this place is normally like this.

Whatever, I don't really care. I lean back on the totem pole trying to get comfortable, laying all five of my arms across me to relax. I think I'll take a nap while I wait for my return back home.

And so I did.

~ The End ~

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